#Robbie's really outing herself as a gummy bear fan

[blogkitty09]

THIS IS DEDICATED TO ALL THE SKATER BEARS IN THE WORLD!!!

[simplyadorkable-blog1]

Season 6, Episode 15 - “Glue”

When Nick freaks out after Reagan lands him a book signing, Jess scrambles to boost his confidence and help it go smoothly. Meanwhile, Winston reveals to Schmidt and Cece that he's proposing to Aly, but needs their help to execute the big plan.

Let’s begin this breakdown with a moment of silence for Robby. Thank you. Nick enters the loft wearing his running bottoms and his hoodie, to Jess, Cece, and Schmidt’s shock and concern. Especially the fact that his hoodie has been washed, which is bone-chilling. Raisin may not understand the need for concern, but Winston sure does. He enters the loft shortly after Nick leaves in a panic and rushes to the window to shout, “Nick! Are you okay? I see you! And I love you!” This is all strangely endearing. But in Raisin’s defense, “No one here emotes in a normal way.”

Winston sits down with Cece and Schmidt, making plenty of eye contact with the couple, as they try to enjoy their boba tea. Winston makes a spot-on comparison of his relationship with Aly to the tea, but Schmidt does not follow. “I haven’t known what you’ve been saying for three and a half years.” Same. Winston finally gets to the point that he’s going to propose to Aly and needs their help. Cece tells Winston that he will make a great husband and father some day, though he points out that he is already a father because Furguson is his blood.

Meanwhile in Jess’ room, Raisin is worried that she’s never going to figure out Nick. “I feel like I found a forest baby, and I don’t know when it’s hungry or in pain or afraid of the kitchen light.” Jess gently explains that he’s an enigma wrapped up in a bunch of Chicago Bears crap. Jess offers to help because she cannot extract herself from their relationship and goes to Nick’s room to find out what’s wrong. It turns out that a publishing company turned down The Pepperwood Chronicles and he’s too embarrassed to tell Raisin. No surprise there, these two cannot communicate. Jess tries to convince Nick to share everything with Raisin. “Don’t just keep her in the perfect front room. Let her in the back with the weird rooms and the dead bulbs and the wet walls.” Nick acquiesces, “All right, but I’m not letting her go anywhere near my crawl space.” He explains that it’s the significant other’s job to clean out the boxes in there, but isn’t Raisin his significant other? But I guess that makes sense since when Jess literally tried cleaning out his boxes, they broke up. Jess is satisfied and leaves to go back to her room. She fills in Raisin on the issue and passes the baton on to her. It’s Robby’s baton, he was really into competitive male twirling.

Anyways, Winston sits down Schmidt and Cece at the bar to explain his plan. He’s going to suggest an activity for the four of them, then back out, leaving the two of the them to distract Aly while he prepares a beautiful and glorious picnic next to her favorite plant, the common cactus. Schmidt is so excited, he has a scream and nowhere to put it. Aly shows up and Cece and Schmidt nervously giggle in anticipation. Winston smoothly covers with, “We all had bubbly water. It made us giggle.” Winston invites Aly to paint their house, catching Cece and Schmidt off guard since their house is almost entirely painted. Schmidt recovers and chimes in with, “We wanted our best friends to finish it. Not professionals. Like our new home was some treehouse in a little league baseball movie.” Aly has never painted before, but reluctantly agrees, and Winston immediately backs out.

Back at the loft, Jess sees Nick sitting alone in the living room, “What’s up, boy in the hood?” Nick explains that Raisin’s, “Been on the phone all day like a grandpa who missed a package. Like… “Hel…” I’m not even gonna do it.” Shame we never got to hear that impression. Raisin cheerfully enters the room to announce that she found a bookstore that will sell Pepperwood, but they need 30 copies for the big reading that night.

Nick freaks out that he will have to do a reading, he doesn’t even know what to read. Thankfully he has his book for that, but that does not assuage the feeling of his heart pumping out scalding hot toilet water. Jess to the rescue, again, with a prototype of the book with perfect perfect-binding she made using her craft wagon. Raisin realizes the reality of having to make all of the books and begins to freak out like a robot, aka not react at all whatsoever. Jess tells Raisin that Nick needs to be kept occupied making the books so he doesn’t lose it again. “Gather around, my little Gutenberg's!” Solid printing press joke. She leaves the two to figure out how to make the books, allowing Raisin to be there for Nick like she always is. And by leave I mean step away five feet to sing with Winston about books and loan him her cactus gloves.

In Cece and Schmidt’s master bedroom, Aly is badly painting the walls. Schmidt describes her technique as, “Begrudgingly covering up graffiti.” I assume she gets that from her law enforcement background. Aly notices Cece and Schmidt whisper arguing in the doorway and offers to leave. Of course, they have to keep her occupied so they make up that they have marital problems. Aly is way too quick to agree.

An undetermined amount of time passes when Jess checks in to see how the books are going to see that Nick is alone with one poorly made book. Which reminds me, remember when Nick and Jess built an indestructible stool from newspapers? Just saying. Jess offers to help Nick finish and hauls out her glue she keeps on her non-mobile craft cart. #CraftCartGoals. It’s quickly evident that the glue is extremely strong and their constant sniffing gets them high which results in an array of nonsensical dialogue including Nick saying, “I think I’ll read that whole book in two minutes.” That book looks bigger than the fifth Harry Potter book so I kind of doubt that. Jess questions if Nick’s hair always looked like that, if it’s brown, and why didn’t he tell her (spoiler: it was a secret). The icing on the cake was Nick pretending to birth the book and Jess congratulating him on the paperback. Raisin returns before this can go any farther. She immediately notices their odd behavior and the strong smell and states what we already know, they are totally high.

Raisin wants to cancel the reading since they are both inebriated. Nick claims that he can still do it, he just has to buckle up his shirt, but the problem with it is that it’s made of honey and is too sticky. Jess still wants to go too and tries to walk off with a backpack full of books before falling hard onto her back like a clumsy turtle.

Back at the house, Cece calls Winston in a panic and they need him to hurry up with his plan. Unfortunately he’s at a costume shop so Cece and Schmidt have to fend for themselves. Schmidt tells Aly, “So many marital problems we have. My baby’s got a real sweet tooth. Just the other day, she ate an entire sleeve of pecan sandies and punched the top right off a parking meter. It was the craziest thing I’ve ever seen.” Cece says that Schmidt is addicted to gambling and cocaine. Aly is fed up with their bizarre behavior and  tries to leave, claiming that she knows they are trying to distract her from a prank. She tells them that she’ll play along to get it over with, but since she only think it’s a prank, we’re okay with the slight deviation from the plan.

Raisin reluctantly brings a high Jess and Nick to the bookstore for the reading. Jess says she can read everything from where she is and finds a secret world in what is actually a pop-up book. While Jess is off exploring, the bookstore owner introduces Nick with a quick reminder that they are dying and to please buy something. Nick approaches the podium to announce that we are all dying before collapsing into an anxiety attack and hiding in a child’s playhouse.

Jess tries to coach Raisin what to say to calm Nick down and ends up pouring out her soul, “Nick, you’re one of the most people I’ve ever met. Everyone here is lucky to hear your book, because it’s a part of you. And if you fail, it doesn’t change how special you are. And no matter what happens here, I’ll always love you.” Be right back, crying. Raisin attempts to comfort Nick and ends up telling him he’s a special boy and pretty much nothing else of value. But she does believe in him, so I can appreciate that kindness. Nick emerges from the playhouse and approaches the podium to read with Jess and Raisin in the front row.

We are saved from this depressing bookstore by a beautiful shot of Malibu as Cece, Schmidt, and Aly arrive to meet Winston. Aly questions what is going on and Winston presents her with a picnic, complete with a cactus. She is pleasantly surprised. Cece and Schmidt watch on to see Winston fake them out by getting on his knee to tie his shoe, give Aly a gummy vitamin, then tie his other shoe. This is why Schmidt double-knots his laces! Why does Schmidt tie Winston’s shoes? We never find out because Winston tells them that they can head off. He also tells them that he’s not actually proposing today and this is part of a 20-phase plan, with subphases, obviously (think of them as annoyingly elaborate smaller phases). Winston explains that Aly deserves the grandest proposal which is kind of sweet, but mostly frustrating. He boops Schmidt and runs back to Aly.

After the book reading, Jess introduces Nick to his biggest fan, a girl who weirdly resembles her. She buys a book for a dollar and scurries off. Nick tells her not to read it all in one place, which is downright adorable, but is worried about the shed scene. Jess suddenly remembers and freaks out too. I’m still not convinced Raisin ever read the book because she doesn’t remember it. How could you forget such an incredibly graphic sexual scene?

Originally Aired 2/07/2017