#Rjalker reads Flatterland

[rjalker]

I give up entirely.

[ID: A screenshot from the book Flatterland, reading, "This, of course, must be the result of sexual selection. The Space Hopper says the same thing happens on Planiturth - female birds prefer males with symmetric tails, for instance. As I understand the process, a symmetric form is an external sign of 'good genes' - an indicator of genetic fitness. Females that happen to mate with symmetric males (and vice versa, natch) have fitter offspring, so not only are genes for symmetry passed on to the kids, so are genes for preferring symmetric mates. Astonishing. Suddenly the whole of our past snobbish society makes complete evolutionary sense. Bummer!" End ID.]

bigoted motherfucker of absolute uselessness

[rjalker]

Granted, I only got to page 3 so far, but yeah, it's extremely weird. The author goes "She's a line for christ's sake" but then she's also...wearing clothes? Like bro am I supposed to be imagining her as a literal line (yk, like in the actual Flatland) or a stylized humanoid? You gotta pick one!!

i like to think that Flatterland's Vikki walks like this. i love this book but also not. dislike at least a 80% of the flatland stuff. Everytging else good. but like. why shoes on a Line. they dont shy away from "theyre literal shapes" so how tf is she wearing a SKIRT and JACKET simultaneously. how tell them apart. Why .

[rjalker]

hey soon I can read past the literal 3rd page of Flatterland!

sure hope to fucking gods it's gonna be a criticism of White Feminism (Straight Line Feminism, if you will) instead of an endorsement of it >.>

[rjalker]

[ID: A black and white drawing of a circle surrounded by sharp straight lines. Inside the circle are the hashtags, "Feminism" and "Girlboss". End ID.]

[rjalker]

reading Flatterland now so here' more of the narrator's family tree.

IDK if Lee is his great granddaughter or married one of his great grandsons yet.

[ID: A family tree for the narrator of Flatland: A Romance of Many Dimensions, and the later adaption, Flatterland.

For all but three of the generations displayed, only a single father and son is showed.

At the top of the family tree is an Isosceles triangle, labeled "I S O", and "Great-great-great-great-great-grandfather" in black text, then "great-great-greate-grandfather" in red. An arrow points at him, saying, "Supposedly stabbed a rich guy (angle supposedly at 59).

Next is another Isosceles triangle, with an arrow labeling him, "Angle supposedly degraded to 58 (A K A the people taking the measurements wrote it that way to punish them.), and then labeled in black, "Great-great-great-great grandfather", and in red, "great-great-grandfather".

Next is another Isosceles triangle, labled in black, "great-great-great-grandfather", and in red, "great-grandfather".

Then another, in black, labeled "great-great-grandfather", and in red, "grandfather".

Then another, in black, labeled, "great-grandfather", and in red, "father".

Below him is a final Isosceles triangle, with an arrow saying, "described by his grandson as 'one of the least irregular of his unhappy Isosceles class'. He is labeled in black, "Grandfather", and in red, "Recounting story".

Below him is an Equilateral triangle, marked "E Q I", and labeled in red, "Father", and in red, "son". An arrow reads, "Granted rank of Equilateral, angle supposedly measured at 60 degrees".

Below him is a Square, labeled in black, "recounting story", and in red, "grandson". He is marked R E G, and labeled with a grey arrow, "the narrator".

Below the square is a line of shapes marked only with "children". There are five pentagons, and one straight line. In the center is a question mark leading down to the next generation.

The next generation is labeled "Grandchildren", and shows two hexagons, with another question mark next to them leading to the next generation.

A Horizontal line separates the above section from the one below, labeled, "Flatterland".

The next generation is marked with a questionmark leading down from the family tree above, labeling this generation, "great grandchildren", with a married-in Straight Line on the side labeled "Jubilee (Lee)".

The final generation of great great grandchildren consists of a single Straight Line, labeled Victoria (Vikki).

End ID.]

[rjalker]

page 29 and it's really irritating.

[rjalker]

[my keyboard iz broken. virtual keyboard iz tiring to uze]

ell. anyay. I can finally read Flatterland. afer ho man detour and ditraction? Firt I had to top on page 4 to make the tranlation o I ouldn't get Corrupted. then it mentioned phereland. hich mentioned The Planivere. hich mentioned An Epiode of Flatland.

o no. I can finally read Flatterland. unle another Flatland-inpired tory ant to drop out of the ky before I get to page 4 again.

[rjalker]

the first half of the meme. the second half will be done when I actually get beyond page 4 of the book.

[ID: The first two panels of the Anakin and Pademe meme, with Anakin now labled, "Vikki", with a question mark, saying, "Straight Lines are the most oppressed people in Flatland.". Padme is now labeled "Me", and is smiling while replying, "This is commentary on White Feminism, right?". End ID.]

(pro tip: if you think Straight Lines are the most oppressed people in Flatland you need to reread it.)

I think Vikki should visit the local elementary school.

[rjalker]

Even the lowest of males, the isosceles triangles, had higher status

R u sure about that Mr. Stewart.

[ID: An screenshot from the second Resident Evil movie, showing Angie, a little girl, looking towards someone behind the camera skeptically, with text around her reading, "Are you sure about that" "are you really sure" "are you" "you sure". End ID.]

I hope this is just what Vikki thinks because she privileged and she will soon be shown reality. YK. By like. Visiting the local elementary school.

[rjalker]

I will read more than the first 3 pages of Flatterland when I'm done my Flatland translation but I'm still just laughing over the basic premise. The narrator's country has been a fashist hellhole for two thousand years at the very least. Why does this man think that'll just suddenly go away. He's grabbed onto the "it's a parody of victorian england" for dear life and is thus missing the whole "it's a dystopian nightmare that is not pulling any punches" part. It is not a 1:1 equivalent for England. Just because men going to war and women going to work helped to shift the ideas of patriarchy in the real England does not mean that'd work in Flatland, espcially because the only men who'd be going to war are the Isosceles! And they'd also still be doing all the work!!! No one's sending fucking squares off to die in war!!!!!

[rjalker]

You know, granted, I only got to page four (4) of Flatterlands before deciding to do my modern translation of Flatland first, but this author...is clearly one of many who's missed many points and does not understand Flatland.

It's not just Britain. You can't just take the history of real life Britain and slap it onto Flatland and call it a day. No, a single war where "all the Men had to leave and the Women went to work" is not gonna fucking do anything to their society because that's not how it would happen in Flatland. That is not even remotely what would happen in this society. At all.

It's just. Lazy. And completely not understanding the social structure of Flatland. And I only got to page 4. And on just page 2 this guy was declaring that Straight Lines are the most oppressed people in Flatland.

Are you fucking kidding me.

Like. I'm going to read the rest when I'm done the Flatland translation into today's language but just. that is not encouraging in the slightest.

Like. I could hold out the tiniest scrap of hope that these ideas are just Vikki's and not the author's, as a commentary on White Feminism™ and lack of intersectionality, but considering he's interrupting the story to speak exasperatedly directly to us, I doubt that's gonna be the case.

But you never know. I could be wrong. I fucking hope so.

[rjalker]

might just start calling things "unfashionably pentagonal". to express what emotion? IDK. failing to understand the deepest premise of a story maybe.

[rjalker]

you can tell a lot about a book from reading the first three pages lol. Lol. There's so much going on in the first three pages of Flatterland that are not encouraging.

but I'll actually finish reading that when I'm done the Flatland translation lol.

A Square's like yes. I'll tell you how we tell people apart but first, let me drop this subject like a hot potato and tell you about our houses instead.

[rjalker]

lazy batard

[rjalker]

im DYING

for the love of fuck author pleae let thi be a thng he ill learn i NOT FUCKING TRUE over the coure of the book or I ear to god I ill kill every ingle peron ho rite a flatland equel

[rjalker]

hey! now I can actually read past literal page 4!!!!