#Realorb

[cruelsister-moved]

i love your content 😵🌞🧐 also i wanted to ask, so i read in your bio how you don't acknowledge pansexual as real! :o and i'm really interested in your thoughts. i'm still figuring it out but i think i identify at least partly with pansexual, because when i say bisexual i feel i am saying i'm not into nonbinary folks. :D so i'd say pansexual! or i guess i just wouldn't define my sexuality at that point and i'd say i'm people-sexual 🤔😂 anyway i really enjoy your blog and await your thoughts :3

Hi! I hope I didn't scare u off with that, I'm just discourse jaded 😳 so I'm going to try n summarise the issues most ppl have with the pansexual label:

1. It's often used in transphobic ways. I myself have literally met multiple people who are like "im pan bc I like men, women, and trans". Binary trans people are already included in every sexuality. If you're a lesbian, you already like trans women. If you're bi, you already like trans men and women. Making a specific label for that is just furthering the narrative that trans people are some "other" category.

2. Nonbinary isn't a third gender. Nonbinary is an umbrella term for a broad array of genders. So no one can say they are or aren't attracted to nonbinary people. As a lesbian I am personally capable of attraction to pretty much anyone who isn't a man. In terms of bisexuality, there is tons of literature going back to the 90s and earlier talking about how bisexuality includes nonbinary individuals and many bisexuals don't feel their attraction is at all impacted by gender.

3. It's homophobic. A lot of the pansexual slogans like hearts not parts and I don't see gender and "im just attracted to PEOPLE" are implying that gay people are just gender obsessed and that as a lesbian I walk around and fall in love with every woman I meet just because they're a woman. I also fall in love with people, not gender identities, I just don't fall in love with men. Also, because a lot of these end up implying that gay people are obsessed with genitals, that lesbians are just attracted to vaginas or gay men are dick obsessed perverts. (which is transphobic and homophobic).

4. Kind of related to the above 3, but it's just wholly unnecessary. like bisexual already encompasses anyone who is attracted to two or more genders and there is literally no need to get rid of a perfectly useful label for a functionally identical label that is often used in transphobic and homophobic ways. It fractures the lgbt community and also generally speaks to the obsession with over-labelling your identity. Which denies other lgbt people of their nuanced internal experience.

All sexuality labels are essentially umbrella terms to best describe how you move through the world, not meant to be like an intensely personal presentation of how u experience attraction bc, frankly, you don't really need to be able to summarise that to a stranger in the same way as "I only date girls" or "I date men and women". I also experience my sexuality in a unique and complex way, and a lot of pan talk feels frankly condescending to other lgb people like we all just smell pheromones and go crazy or something.

Sorry this is so long it's 1am and I can't edit my thoughts rn 😭😭 but

TLDR: 1. The pansexual label often others trans and nonbinary people when other sexualities are already inclusive of them (not just bisexual. gay includes trans and nb men, lesbian includes trans and nb women).

2.Nonbinary isn't a single gender you can be attracted to, so you can't base a gender identity around it.

3. It furthers homophobic and transphobic stereotypes

4. It's completely unnecessary and divides the lgbt community for no useful reason. Every explanation for how pan and bi are different ends up being transphobic and illogical.

if you're still confused, pls do send me another ask and when I'm more awake tomorrow I will point you in the way of some bisexuals who are way more informed than me and will be able to counsel you from one bi to another 💜💜