#Rather than actually talking about it because I'm a massive pussy

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #210

In what form of communication did you last use to talk to the person you're currently interested in? Discord.

When was the last time something really cute happened to you? When I was at Girt's house a few days ago, when his mom got home, I called hi to her and she got so excited, exclaiming, "My girl's here!!" and she comes into his bedroom to hug and kiss my head and it was so adorable she's so pure

Has anything happened to you within the past month that's made you really happy? Girt started talking about engagement rings with me (he started it, not me) and was deadass taking notes in his phone lmao. I'm not in a rush or anything, but HIM bringing it up was validating that he genuinely wants to be with me forever. Ever since Jason I still struggle to imagine anyone at all ever wanting to marry me.

What was the last thing you looked up on YouTube? Rammstein albums, lol. I've gone through their entire discography before but I did a massive bulk of it a second time and I found I like even more songs than the first time, and that was already the vast majority of their entire history of songs.

Did the last guy/girl you kissed have any piercings? No, I could never picture him with any and I don't believe he wants any.

Do you actually love your parents? Yes. I would die without a millisecond of thought for my mom. I hold some bitterness and hurt towards my dad, but yes, I still love him.

Where did you get the underwear you are wearing right now? I'm in my pjs, I'm not wearing any. Who in the hell wears undies in their pjs, that entirely ruins the comf. I know for a woman it's not healthy to wear them 24/7, anyway. let yo pussy breathe

Do you feel uncomfortable sharing drinks with other people? The one and only person I'll comfortably share a drink with is Girt, if I can make out with him I can drink after the guy lmao. I'd still very much prefer my own drink, though. It doesn't really matter who you are.

Have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far? blink blink blink

Last person to make you seriously mad? Our landlord.

Who have you recently made up with after fighting? Nobody.

Funniest name you have ever heard? This is a very mean question, next.

When people ask "how are you?" do you say "good" even if you aren't? No, actually. I might downplay how bad I am, but I don't pretend to be well if I'm not.

Do you wear your hair up or down most often? It's too short to go up, so.

Have you ever eaten tofu and if so, did you enjoy it? I don't believe I have. It doesn't look like something I'd enjoy whatsoever.

Have you worn make-up today? I couldn't even TRY to remember the last time I wore makeup...

Can you hear anything right now? I have "Tattoo" by Rammstein on.

What was the last fruit you ate? It was either pineapple or grapes.

Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? I watched some with Sara when I visited her once, because it was one of her favorite shows. I thought it was fine, but I didn't have any strong feelings. Television shows normally don't do it for me.

Have you watched a movie this week? No, movies are another thing I don't generally care for much, unless it's a theater experience. I can't remember the last film I watched.

How far away is the closest McDonald’s from your house? Around 5-ish minutes by car, depending on what traffic lights you hit.

Have you ever been to Hawaii? No.

How old is the mattress on your bed? It's rather new. I don't think I've had it even a year yet.

Do you keep magazines by your toilet? No. Bring your phone bro

Do you watch movies with the subtitles on? No, unless it's very quiet or foreign. I generally find subtitles to be distracting.

Are you happy? I'm currently rawdogging my mental illnesses with no medication, no :^)

Do you still talk to the person who hurt you the most? Nope.

What do you wear to bed? Loose pj pants and a tank top.

What are you excited about? This weekend Girt and I are going to Charlotte to meet a couple that are some online/gaming friends of his, and we're gonna do stuff around the city. It's more than a three hour drive and we're going there and back in the same day so it's gonna be a long day, but I'm looking forward to it.

Best summer? I'm supposed to remember this?

What type of foundation do you wear? I don't wear it.

Have you read the Pretty Little Liars series? No, but god my sister Misty was obsessed with that and its show when it was a thing.

Do you actually read privacy policies when signing up for new things? Does literally anyone?????

Can you juggle? No.

Do you like Nerds candy? I love them.

What is your favorite color(s) of eye-makeup? It's all about the black, baby.

Do you have sensitive skin? Yes.

Who in your family would you describe as a “character”? My dad.

What color is your best friend’s hair? Black, although like his dad, he's graying very early so there's a lot of that grizzled in.

Do you think your neighbors have any complaints about living near you? No. We mind our business and our dog doesn't bark much.

Is there something you want to tell someone? Two somebodies. I doubt they'll ever be said, though.

Are you interested in more than one person at the moment? No.

How frequently do you pee at night? Once or twice. A night where I don't get up at least once is basically unheard of.

Is there a stuffed animal you still take places with you? No.

Have you ever done something illegal with a family member? What about with your best friend? Possibly, I don't feel like thinking about this forever.

Would you rather get high or get drunk? High, but only on like, weed. No serious drugs that are truly dangerous if you take a responsible dose. Being drunk doesn't sound pleasant in any way, tbh.

What was the last thing you cooked? I don't cook, I pop shit in the microwave lmao.

Have you ever gotten alcohol poisoning? No, that sounds like hell.

Do you want to see someone at this very moment? Yeah, Girt.

Think of the person who has hurt you the most in the past year, who is it? I saw the woman TWICE and it was my last psychiatrist. She did me so much harm in such a short time.

Do you think two people can last forever? 'Til they die, anyway. I don't pretend to know what's gonna happen once my body's dead.

Last person you talked to on the phone for longer than 5 min? My dad.

Are you a morning person or night person? Morning.

Who was the last person in your bedroom? Mom. Besides me, anyway.

Did you ever lose a best friend? What adult hasn't at some point, honestly?

How many piercings do you have? Six right now. Others that have closed either intentionally but mostly unintentionally due to being hospitalized and piercings having to come out.

What is your middle name? Marie.

Could you handle living with the last boy you texted? That's my dad, and yeah, I'd be fine.

Have you been to the beach this year? No, doubt I will.

Does it take a lot to make you cry? Sure doesn't.

Do you have a favorite classical composer? No.

Would you ever visit a psychic medium? No, they're scam artists.

Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? Dishwasher.

Who was the last non-relative woman you spoke to in person? The woman who took my blood today.

What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? I was once a conservative dicklord of a teenager. Now I'm politically left and feel very strongly about these beliefs.

Have you ever had a dream in which you died? Multiple.

Do you use Snapchat? No.

Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? Yes.

Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Not knowingly to me.

Which accents can you emulate pretty well? British and country are about it.

Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? ...........................................................

What’s the weirdest way you’ve ever heard somebody die of? Oh I dunno.

How many true heartbreaks have you had in your lifetime? One true one, romantically.

Do you have any gay family members? My mom's cousin or something named Tom is gay.

Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Girt.

Would you ever get a boob job? If I lose all the weight I want, I want to get a breast lift. Obesity does things.

Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? No. I would only be upset if he tried to hide it from me.

Have you ever been punched? No.

How do you feel about bats? I love bats, I think they're very cute. Especially flying foxes and similar species.

Has your Facebook ever been hacked? No.

Have you ever played laser tag? Yes, it was extremely fun.

Is anyone you’re close to in the hospital right now? No.

Who or what sleeps with you? Roman, my cat. He starts off in my bed, anyway; throughout the night he goes to different spots.

Are you pro-life or pro-choice? Pro-choice as fuck. It's not even a matter of whether the baby is truly "alive" or not to me, if it's in MY fuckin body, my wants and needs come first.

Who was your first kiss with? Jason.

What aren’t you afraid to stand up for? LGBTQ+ rights, for one. I'd die for the right to love and to be true to your own body and however it feels like home.

Do you have any STDs? I don't.

Do you have a favorite NASCAR driver? I couldn't care less about NASCAR.

Who’s your celebrity crush? a stupid german rockstar old enough to be my dad 😭

Have you ever intentionally trolled? Hm, not to my recollection.

What is your favorite type of cat? Oriental shorthairs.

What ancient culture intrigues you the most, if any? Maybe Egyptian.

[ask-artsy-oncie]

I was gonna make a big long post about gender last night but I got really high and fell asleep before I could do that

Talking about gender and genitals below

I still am genderfluid. But I realized a few days ago that my type of genderfluidity is less feminine than I used to think. I think it's a lot like how I described Louie's gender, for those who have been following me for the DT17 fandom, where like, the fluidity is between boy, agender, and demi-girl. At the time I didn't realize that was how I felt about my own gender.

But I've been thinking about it and demi-girl really does best describe how I relate to womanhood. I was thinking how fucking upset and dysphoric being called a "woman" is, but I tried thinking of myself as a "nonbinary woman" (which is a term I remember Rebecca Sugar using to describe themself, not sure if it still is) and things felt a lot more comfortable, a lot more right.

Being called "she" makes me upset and tired, but I think that's mostly because I'm SICK of being misgendered at work (which double-sucks because that's the only place where I wear a pronoun pin) and I'm a little more sure that I'd be fine with it if people actually respected me. I'm leaving it in my pronouns. But there's a reason I put "he" and "they" first.

I very much want to be seen as like. A feminine man. A prettyboy. But also someone who you question the gender of like 90% of the time. I dunno how better to describe it. It would be nice to use the men's restroom without fear, also.

I think one of the biggest reasons I clung to femininity is that my bottom dysphoria is MASSIVELY fluid. Some days I want a dick so bad it makes me want to die because I wasn't born with one. Those days are fewer and far between now that I'm not a teenager anymore, but I do still get days where I just wish I was born with a cock. But a lot of the time I'm comfortable with the genitals I was born with, and honestly I really would like to get pregnant and have at least one child someday. And I've gotten more comfortable with my genitals the more and more I've seen people sexualize trans men of all different transitional stages, kind of normalizing guys having pussies and still being guys. I remember not wanting to even TOUCH tguy porn when I was younger because of my bottom dysphoria, but now I seek it out by default. I want to see guys with scars and pussies in my porn, it makes me so much more comfortable.

I think I'm more fluid in how I feel about my genitals than how I actually feel about my gender, is what I'm getting at. Being able to recognize that sometimes I wanna be a man with a cock and sometimes a man with a pussy (though sometimes I feel feminine and want a cock, those feelings have definitely happened). I think that's why I consider myself a trans man rather than just non-binary (though I do still consider myself non-binary). Why I consider myself mlm.

I'm happy to have figured things out a little more. My lables haven't really changed at all but I know a little more about myself.

[maleficore]

(Oc & creator questions!)

7, 10, 23, 27

F, G

Hohoho strap in (this is obv about Jesse, for those who are just joining us)

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling? I would say… calmness? When things are slow and there's not much to worry about. Stuff like quiet nights around the campfire, going on pointless rides etc. It reminds him of childhood and being back home, but he does not enjoy it. Not with all of it having been ripped away from him as forcefully as it was. It might feel nice, however the thoughts that come later are not.

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them? Oh definitely the one where when asked by one of his brothers (the wording different) "Are you a queer?" he said "No." and it does haunt the absolute shit out of him. It's very much not a "I wish I said the truth" thing, though. It's more the entire situation surrounding the lie that is a massive motivator for the way that he acts and the way that he does, in a negative way. A bit not what the question is about, I guess, but he really is not a liar so I don't have much else…

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)? Take what he wants? Hell no, he's totally the opposite type of person. He won't take shit unless he's explicitly allowed to take it or told to steal it (he's an outlaw after all lol even if only out of necessity). Resentful, though… totally. He can be a little bitch when things that he wants are unattainable. Especially after he's gotten older and starts to feel a bit like he's just… owed some of them? For the shitty life he's had? Still he'd rather seethe in silence than do something about it. He's not a risk taker unless he has to and stealing taking what you want is always risky.

What causes them to feel dread? Better question would be what doesn't lmao Since in modern times he would definitely be considered to have some sort of an anxiety disorder (just like me wahoo) -- he's always on his toes, anticipating the worst possible outcome. I'd go as far as to say dread sparsely leaves him.

What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)? Excitement!! I get so freaking giddy when I think of my silly little cowboy… Sadness sometimes too, because his story is tragic and fucked up, but it's that enjoyable type.

What trait of theirs bothers you the most? I'm gonna take this in a "if I met him" way because I'm in full control of his personality and actions so if something actually bothered me, I'd just change it 😅 In that case the answer is: that he's a pussy. It's not that he's not brave, a coward that would rather hide away from the danger than to jump into action. I'm talking more inter-personally, emotionally. If you read any of the stuff I wrote about him, you know what I mean. If he were my bestie, just hearing him talk about his life and relationships would make me want to beat the shit out of him.

[werevampiwolf]

Oh, also, one of the two known instances of wild inland taipan bites was a guy that was trying to catch one to show someone, which leaves just one known instance of a bite that could be argued as being unprovoked, and I'm skeptical as to if that's even the case.

But saying "antivenom is for pussies" when it comes to the handling the inland taipan is like saying "shielding is for pussies" while fucking around inside an active nuclear reactor. And there's even some overlap in results.

Though to be clear, snakes are not evil, and 99.999% of the time, they don't want to hurt you. They just want you to go away. (There have been a few instances of large constrictors eating people, but it's usually ones that were starving, often ones that were being underfed while kept as pets).

I know a lot of people's instinctive reaction to snakes, especially in the wild, is to panic and try and kill them on sight, which is unnecessary, and besides, they're much more likely to try and bite you if you're fucking around with it, because they feel like they need to defend themselves. Some snakes can even bite after they're dead. Just leave them alone.

Oh, and science note, we're not actually sure if inland taipan contains nephrotoxins, 1, because it's hard to get venom to test due to the fact that they generally try to avoid biting if possible and the fact that their venom is so dangerous if you do manage to get one to bite, but also, 2, because it definitely contains myotoxins, which break down the muscles. And myoglobin, and some other products of the process, are toxic to the kidneys in and of themselves.

Let me say that plainly. Your muscles start to eat themselves and then you piss out the remnants, which fucks up your kidneys. Literally one of the hallmarks of systematical muscle destruction is that your piss looks like black tea. This can also happen if you get part of your body crushed by a falling building or in a car accident. That's the level of damage that occurs. And that's just one component of their venom cocktail. There's also neurotoxins. Not only does your brain stop working correctly, which can lead to brain damage if you manage to survive, but your nervous system is also what allows you to move, it's what allows your body parts to communicate with each other, and that damage can be permanent too. And then there's the hemotoxins, which essentially cause your red blood cells to burst, rendering them useless. You slowly suffocate as oxygen from your lungs can no longer be distributed through your body. Also, hemotoxins cause extreme pain as they damage other tissues, and can lead to the loss of limbs, even with immediate treatment. The reason snake venom contains hemotoxins is because it makes prey easier to digest. There's also the kidney failure and the massive internal bleeding and subsequent clotting throughout the body I talked about in my previous reblog.

In short, if you survive an inland taipan bite, you're almost certainly going to wish you hadn't.

Like, I'm multiply disabled and have been on the receiving end of able-bodied people telling me they'd rather die than end up like me, so I'm typically very hesitant to say things like that, so I feel like that should help illustrate how much damage the bite of an inland taipan can do.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes

[imo-chan-imagines]

Masturbation | FKBU Headcanons

Ever wondered what Daisuke and Haru would be like when they touch themselves?

Characters: Kambe Daisuke, Katou Haru

Tags/warnings: Fugou Keiji Balance: Unlimited (anime), 18+, explicit descriptions of sexual activity, male masturbation, headcanons

⚠️ 18+ CONTENT! MINORS: PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT ⚠️

A/N: I just wanted to write about them stroking their cocks. I'm thirsty, alright? Cut me some slack 😩 Personally, I'm very much a fan of what I've written for Haru, but that might just be my tastes...

Anyway, thanks for reading, and please enjoy! ♡ And please consider voting in this poll to help me celebrate 100 followers! Thank you! ♡

♤ Kambe Daisuke ♤

Daisuke isn't masturbation-mad he drowns in pussy, so he doesn't feel an overwhelming need all the time

But every now and then, he'll get the urge, and if there's no one around who can satisfy him... 🤷‍♀️

Doesn't feel at all guilty about it because he knows that basically everyone does it and he would probably talk very nonchalantly about it with you if you asked, so if you're into that, you're in luck *wink wonk*

With Daisuke, it's either about pure practicality, or unadulterated indulgence

Either he's hard and distracted, and he needs to not be, so he rubs one out–

Or he's feeling like absolutely spoiling himself, drawing it out as long as possible and making himself feel ~amazing~

If he's being practical, he'll try and get it over with quickly, probably into the toilet or something. No fuss, etc.

If he's feeling like indulging himself, he'll get the whole freaking bedroom ready: soft sheets, high quality porn in HD ready, bottles of lube yes, multiple, different toys all laid out ready to be fucked like crazy–

He totally has Pornhub Premium and has no qualms leaving comments on his favourite videos 😂

He doesn't have to think about anyone in particular when he's masturbating. Sometimes it's a face he knows well, others a stranger he passed in the street. Sometimes they're faceless he's flexible

And, like I said, he has no shame about it. It is what it is 🤷‍♀️

Soooo, Daisuke's favourite toy is a fleshlight that he can mount to a table surface etc. He loves being able to go at it like a real pussy with no hands, and not have to hold back with his thrusts

But the rhythmic banging sound of him fucking it can literally be heard down the entire length of the hallway *dies*

Daisuke, ya ain't slick 😂😭😂

When indulging, he's definitely a fan of gently caressing up and down his cock with a Magic Wand vibrator y'all know the ones I mean until he's covered in precum 😍🤤

If he's in a relationship or seeing someone, he has no shame in video-calling said person and fucking himself in front of them I mean 😳😳

I volunteer as tribute!!

And he's happy for them to join in and start touching themselves too the more the merrier!

He's comfortable with flaunting just how hard you they make him 🤑

He'll definitely keep his favourite pictures and videos of his encounters on his phone to ~use~ at his leisure

He'll casually scroll through the special folder on his phone at incredibly inappropriate times and smirk to himself

His face doesn't change too much when he's stroking his cock. It gets a little serious and he frowns like when he's pissed off and serious in the anime and his cheeks are tinged with a light blush, but on the whole, he's pretty collected

And you won't hear much from him other than grunts, heavy breaths, and stifled groans they're deep and gruff, and so fucking hot 🥵

But he is pretty strong and vigorous, I will say that. No soft, delicate touches and submissive moans here

Daisuke doesn't make love – he fucks, and that's exactly how he gets off by himself hnngg

Sometimes he just likes to see how long he can last, edging himself over and over for hours, sensitive and shaking, until he cums and shoots a massive load 😳🤫

I know I said he's not masturbation-mad, and he's not. He doesn't do it that often, but he likes to be at the top of his game, and he likes feeling good 🤗

There's a particular vein on the underside of his massive cock, that from past experiences if it's stroked or caressed, produces a highly pleasurable and intoxicating feeling

And he'll use this to his advantage, deliberately thumbing over it with fervour he likes to imagine someone's tongue curling up and down it 😏

Like, yes Daddy 🥵 let me suck your cock for you 🥺

He's literally so confident about it all. Absolute king 👑

☆ Katou Haru ☆

So, like Daisuke, Haru's not exactly crazy about masturbation, but rather than it being an occasional thing, it's more like a phase that comes and goes?

He'll go for a month or more with hardly needing to touch himself at all

And then – BOOM! Man can't go more than a couple of hours without needing to cum again

Literally can hardly do it enough

When he gets in that rut, Haru gets... desperate and it's so hot

Unlike Daisuke, Haru is very vocal when touching himself etc.

His face gets incredibly flushed, his eyes get hazy, and his hips basically move on their own I want to see iittt, pleeaase 🥺

Haru can't really afford toys etc. and would literally die of embarrassment from purchasing them so what he tends to do is:

Use his hand to stroke his cock

Make a homemade pocket pussy look up how, my peeps. It's quite easy

Or his most usual way humping things like crazy

One of his favourite ways of getting off, is taking two cushions/pillows, sliding his cock between them, and thrusting into them I highly recommend if you enjoy the movement of thrusting

I'm told it's surprisingly more intimate than stroking your own cock

When he gets like that, it's a because of an immediate need to be satisfied, and sometimes he won't even fully take off his trousers

He'll just be grinding away at it, desperately gripping the futon underneath him as he imagines being inside a tight, warm pussy, his hips getting faster and sloppier until he cums 🤪🤤

Lorddd, my body is readyyy 😩

Completely the opposite to Daisuke, Haru gets incredibly embarrassed about the whole topic, and also feels a strong amount of shame and guilt 😔

Especially when he thinks about an actual person which is why he tries not to, but he really thrives off of intimacy and connection, so it's hard

If he's in a relationship/seeing someone, he'll always make sure they're okay with him masturbating, thinking about them, etc. beforehand

Haru's the kind of guy who'll have a wet dream and start grinding against the futon in his sleep, and wake up just in time to feel himself orgasm and it normally gets all over him

Idk if that really counts as masturbation? I mean, I guess, right?

The tip of Haru's cock is really sensitive, so when his uses his hand, he likes to gently encircle it with his thumb which makes him leak so much precum 💦

Oh, and Haru is also a big fan of milking himself 😍

When he's in a rut and feeling desperate, he likes nothing better than to spend the entire mornings or afternoons of his day off cooped up in his flat, fucking himself over and over, until his cock's drained and he's completely worn out 🤫🤭🤤

Guess what he'd want to be doing with you on his days off...

But then, almost as if it never happened, like a switch has been flipped, he'll be back to normal for a month or so, and won't feel the need to jerk off more than a couple of times a week

And he gets so embarrassed about it 😭😭

He throws out the pocket pussy he made literally dying thinking about how many times and how desperately he fucked it so then he always has to make a new one all over again 😭😭

He gets scared about people finding out horny he gets and what they'll think of him 😫

Like, hush baby. I'd love to take care of you when you're like that 🤗 Cum inside me as much as you want 🥺

Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, please consider voting in this poll to help me celebrate reaching 100 followers! Thank you!

© imo-chan-imagines 2020

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: [details of some party that they can go to because it's not someone he knows its more like a friend of a friend of so they can do what they want] Buster: I'll pick you up when you're ready Rio: Oh, I'm with Nancy rn Rio: think I might be in it for the long haul over here Buster: You've been there ages Rio: I know Rio: been a while, lots she wants to catch up on Rio: I can probably make it though, if I start politely getting ready to leave soon Buster: Where are you? Rio: at mine Rio: we went out shopping for a bit but now we're just chilling Buster: I'll tell her mum or dad are on the warpath, either's believable Buster: She'll be back before she realises they're working Rio: That's not very friendly, is it Buster: She's my sister, not my friend Rio: yeah but won't she wonder why you've tricked her Buster: She'll think I got it wrong, a common enough thought for her to have about me Buster: Who cares? Rio: I don't wanna be mean Buster: Don't then Buster: To me Buster: I haven't seen you all day Rio: Baby Rio: you know I wanna be with you Rio: let me get out of this my way though Buster: Alright Rio: I promise, it won't take that long Buster: You do know that unless you appear right now it's too long, yeah? Rio: Of course Rio: you know I missed you as much Rio: more, I think Buster: So prove it by getting rid of her Rio: I will Rio: it would've looked so suspect if I didn't spend any time with her Buster: Or like you've outgrown her which everyone wanted us to do with each other, therefore they'd have to be thrilled Rio: If everyone weren't massively hypocritical Rio: or her social life was a bit more robust in general Buster: Her lack of a social life is her own problem, not yours, babe Rio: not if I ditch her at the drop of a hat Rio: but I've worked it out Buster: Tell her to ditch her fringe and you'll be doing her such a big favour it'll cancel out the abrupt goodbye Rio: Stop 🤫 Rio: I'd almost forgot how rude you can be 🙄😏 Rio: I'm gonna have a fake argument with Dan that I'll 'need' to go and sort out Buster: It sounds good in theory but she'll probably try and convince you not to 'cause he's a man Rio: She can text me the TLDR of the gay agenda Rio: it'll be fine, less of a 😱 when I dump him later too Buster: Surprised you ain't had a real argument by now Buster: He's even more of a pussy than I thought Rio: He knows I'm busy with family still Buster: And those papers don't deliver themselves Rio: You're SO funny, babe Buster: Yeah, I know Buster: One of many talents Rio: I might rank it lower than some of your others Rio: but I still like ya Buster: Don't force yourself, like Rio: Come on Rio: what have you been doing today anyway? Buster: As the twin with a social life in each of our postcodes, I've been busy fulfilling those obligations Rio: See, you've been keeping busy too Rio: not even missed me Buster: I can do both Buster: Multitasking is one of my aforementioned talents Rio: I can give you that one Buster: [a topless post football playing selfie like see busy and thinking about/missing you hence I took this for you] Buster: I'll give you this then Rio: 😍😍😍 Rio: I wanna come watch you play next time Buster: Yeah? Rio: you need to ask when you look like that? Rio: I could be there, right, at a proper match Buster: 'Course Buster: Probably don't tell the others though, it'd be hard to stop Billie and Edie from wanting to come with you Rio: True Rio: do your parents come? Rio: 'cos I'd rather not control my 😍😍😍 at all Buster: They'd have to not be working for there to be any danger of that Rio: I thought so Rio: I'll cheer you on Rio: bring the 🍊🍊 Buster: My dad watches me box more often, you wouldn't like that anyway Rio: not gonna encroach on your male bonding time, don't worry Buster: Hilarious Rio: I was being serious Buster: Me too, it's hilarious you reckon we have any kind of bond to encroach on Rio: you live together Rio: that's something, like Buster: Only 'cause they won't let me move out yet Rio: Well yeah Rio: you are only 14 Buster: And they were making such good choices when they were Rio: they didn't get to have their own place either Buster: They didn't need one, they were already living in the same house Rio: I doubt that argument will change their mind Buster: Whatever, I'm not trying to leave Ava with just Nance Buster: She'd make her well weird Rio: I don't think you can't make anyone anything Rio: least of all your sister Buster: You know what I mean Buster: And you don't have to jump to the other's defence, I ain't gonna send her this Rio: Whatever Rio: what are you gonna wear tonight then? Buster: Unlike you I haven't been shopping, maybe I'll go now while I'm waiting for you Rio: Just trying to work out the level of effort I need to put in Buster: What level of effort would you like to put in? Rio: I just don't want to look out of place Rio: why is that a problem? Buster: It's not a problem, why are you coming at me with an attitude? Rio: Sorry Rio: I think all this shit that's going on with Nance has got to me Buster: What's she said? Rio: Just all about those kids, what they say and do Rio: it's a shitty situation Buster: Stay with her if you want, I can take some of the lads with me Rio: If you'd rather Buster: I obviously wouldn't Buster: But if it'll make you feel better Rio: I don't know Rio: there's nothing I can do for her Buster: I'd say bring her but she'd never go Rio: I hardly blame her Buster: 'Course not, you never do Rio: Going to a party where she knows no one won't make her feel any better Buster: She doesn't wanna feel better, she'd rather wallow Buster: A party's as good a place as any for that Rio: You invite her then Rio: I'm not a middleman Buster: I don't actually want her there, unbelievable as that may sound, babe Rio: then we're agreed it's a bad idea Buster: I'll take us being in agreement about something as far as my fucking sister is concerned Rio: For God's sake Rio: let's drop this Buster: Don't for God's sake me Rio: This conversation is pointless Buster: That ain't stopped you keeping one going with Nance though Rio: Your sister has spent most of today telling me how hard she's struggling and how hard she gets bullied and you want me to just put that aside like it's nothing Buster: Would you like me to applaud you for having to hear a day's worth of it? Rio: Don't be a dick Buster: Don't tell me what it's like as if I don't go to the same school Rio: Don't make it about you Rio: it's happening to her Buster: Cheers for that, I had no idea Rio: Like I said, pointless Rio: have a good night with your friends Buster: I will Rio: 👍 Great Buster: It's no mansion but I'll make the best of it regardless Rio: Go away now Buster: Who do you think you're talking to? Buster: That hasn't worked on me a single time you've tried it Rio: You're just trying to annoy me now and I don't need it Buster: You wish Buster: She's annoying you and you don't wanna admit that to yourself or her Rio: No, you're being an asshole because you're mad Buster: I'll take all the blame, babe, what do I care? Buster: It's a well established role, I'm the asshole and she's the only one ever who suffers Rio: I haven't said that, no one's said that Buster: Chelsea's always been a picnic for me, like Buster: Not that anyone's ever asked Rio: I know that, why are you saying it like I don't Rio: and I can't do fuck all about that either Buster: 'Cause you're acting like you don't Rio: The ways you cope aren't the ways she does, or doesn't Rio: I just don't see the point of acting like that'll work Buster: Well, I don't see the point of you taking all her bullshit on as your own Buster: Or getting dragged down by it Rio: I can't just Rio: dismiss it that easily Rio: she's still here, like, can you just give me a moment Buster: Take loads of them Buster: I'll see you tomorrow Rio: Thanks so much Buster: You're so welcome Rio: Bye then Buster: Yeah Rio: if that's how you feel then just see me on easter Buster: If that's how you feel, then you might as well bring your boyfriend to celebrate with us all Rio: Fuck you Buster: No, fuck you Rio: I don't get why you're being like this Rio: explain it to me Buster: You don't get to hold Easter over me like an ultimatum when you know it won't be the same then Buster: We only get 7 days and you've already spent this one with her but I can't be upset about it 'cause she's more upset than me Buster: Fuck that Buster: And like I said, fuck you Rio: You're allowed but that ain't what you put out at all Rio: you're mad at her, I get it, but fuck taking that out on me Rio: she's my cousin, I have to see her when she comes over Rio: and nah, it isn't a fun time but you don't need to take my mood so personally Buster: Forget it Buster: You could just see her on Easter, but why would you when that threat works so much better on me Rio: It's not a threat Rio: if you reckon you're gonna have so much more fun with your friends then you may as well Buster: I reckon I'll have to try and have fun with them 'cause that's the only option you've given me Rio: I was actually coming 'til you told me not to Buster: I didn't tell you not to Rio: Yes you did Rio: you said see you tomorrow Buster: Don't put words in my mouth Buster: You already weren't coming by the time I said that Rio: Then why would I have left my house to go have an imaginary argument for you Buster: To have a real one with me, obviously Rio: Yeah, that's exactly how I wanted to spend my evening, you've got it Rio: never mind I can't friggin' go back five minutes later 'cos she's probably still there with Junior Buster: You and me both Buster: So don't go back yet Rio: Well where do you suggest I go Rio: seeing as you've uninvited me from the party 'cos I'm so shit Buster: Come on Rio: I'm not sorry I care about her Rio: and that isn't me saying you don't, or me saying I don't care about you either Rio: I clearly do Buster: I don't want you to be sorry Buster: I love that you care so much, you know that Rio: are you coming to pick me up then or what? Buster: I'm basically halfway to you already Buster: I wasn't gonna turn around, who am I? Buster: Not a cunt who gives up that easy, like Rio: Don't scare me like that Buster: I didn't mean to Buster: I'm sorry Rio: You wanted to make me feel how you did Rio: I get it Rio: I've missed you too today Buster: It just made me think about what it'll be like, I've been trying not to Rio: Yeah Rio: I know Rio: we'll have to work out how often we can Buster: I missed you so much Buster: I can't leave you Rio: but you have to Rio: there's no scenario where we can be together as much as we want Rio: even if we weren't having to hide it Buster: There has to be, there's always choices Buster: If you want something badly enough, you make it happen Buster: That's my life Rio: You can't leave school, I can't go to yours, I wouldn't get in Rio: and I can't just move myself to London with nowhere to live and no plan Buster: Then I'll move back here Buster: With Nan and Granddad Rio: Your parents won't want that Rio: even if they're barely about, they still want you around Buster: I don't give a shit what they want Rio: I know, but it means they've got enough say to stop you, at least for now Rio: in a few years, nah Rio: it's shit, I don't want that to be how it is any more than you do Rio: I wanna be with you always Buster: In a few years you could have a boyfriend that isn't a pussy with a paper round Rio: Do you actually think I'm going to get a new boyfriend? Buster: Not right now, obviously Rio: Not ever, if you still want me Rio: I've only got this one still because I don't want to waste our time together right now dealing with the logistics of formally dumping him Buster: Like you said, we can't be together as much as we want Rio: so that means, what, to you Rio: you need to keep this open Buster: It means you deserve better Rio: there isn't better Rio: you said that Rio: and I believe it Buster: Not than me, but than this bullshit scenario Buster: My mum and dad only got through uni 'cause they had us, everyone knows that Buster: They'd had years together by then Rio: Well, I believe in us Rio: I thought you did too Buster: I do Buster: I just can't fucking breathe when I think about going back Rio: it's the first time Rio: we'll get better at it Rio: we'll have to Buster: Yeah, I'll add it to the list of shit I have to do Buster: It'll be fine Rio: It won't Rio: it'll hurt like hell Rio: but we have to be okay with that Rio: if we want the good of it Buster: Don't Buster: You can't ask me to be okay with hurting you Rio: It hurt more Rio: being without you Rio: we'll have more than we did, no matter Buster: I know Rio: That's what love is, right Rio: no matter what Buster: If it ain't that, I don't know what else it would be Rio: I don't want anyone else Rio: even if it's painful Buster: Okay Buster: Me either, in case that wasn't painfully obvious Rio: You better not Rio: You're mine Rio: I can't share you Buster: I am yours Buster: I told you, nobody is gonna change my mind Buster: I probably should have said no obstacle though, 'cause distance won't either Rio: not even you Rio: you can't change your mind yet Rio: preferably ever but Rio: I won't say you can't there Buster: Especially not me, what the fuck do I know, I reckoned ignoring you for the rest of our lives would work Buster: I won't ever change my mind 'cause I can't Buster: That'd be a mistake and those aren't allowed Rio: I love you Rio: and I'll get better at listening Buster: I love you too, but I can't promise that I'll get better at staying calm Buster: You know my history Rio: I know you Rio: and I love you as you Rio: we'll make this work Rio: what else can we do, right Buster: She gets to me too, you know Buster: Or all of that bullshit at school does Rio: Of course it does Rio: no one wants to hear that about their family Rio: and not be able to stop it Rio: I know you care Buster: She doesn't understand Rio: She sees it like you're picking their side Rio: instead of trying to keep some of them vaguely on it in any way Buster: I'm not gonna take on the whole school for her Buster: It shouldn't have got that far Buster: She lets shit escalate and then expects me to fix it Rio: She's a good victim Rio: she rises it to it, you know Rio: if she could just laugh it off or let it go, it wouldn't be happening Buster: I don't know how the fuck she could have been raised the same way as me, with the parents we have, and become that Buster: Everything my mum went through, it's offensive Rio: She doesn't mean to be the way she is Rio: she needs to get to a place where she can help herself, or ask for help Buster: She doesn't try hard enough not to stand in her own way Buster: So she might as well mean it Rio: It's frustrating, I know Buster: Frustrating ain't the word Buster: But whatever Rio: You can't change her Rio: unfortunate or otherwise Rio: just how it is, babe Buster: At least she ain't Ro levels yet Rio: Is anyone Rio: now that's offensive Buster: Fair point Rio: swear she lowkey hates me Buster: She don't like anyone Rio: yeah but she liked my ma and me being born stole her attention Rio: gutted ever since, I'm so sorry Buster: Come on, be real, she liked your mum until Edie was born Rio: Too true Rio: 'course that had NOTHING to do with Drew 🙄 Buster: Maybe she only wants mixed race babies Buster: I'll ask her if she comes to Easter Rio: 😂 Rio: please do Rio: how did you stand to live with her for all those years Buster: They are cuter, like Buster: And I didn't have a choice Rio: You'll want to get with a darker girl than me then Rio: it's amazing your da didn't murder-suicide Buster: No, I won't Buster: Look no further for where I get my coping strategies from, bottle in hand literally as I type this Rio: That's just cultural, like Rio: and when your brother does what Joe did, who's checking Buster: Yeah Buster: At least you're not actually my sister Rio: again, don't think that's calming anyone Buster: When have I ever been a calming influence? Rio: I wish there was explaining it Rio: but nah Buster: Who do we owe an explanation to? Rio: I mean, if we could Rio: so we didn't have to hide it Buster: If we ever tell anyone I'm not explaining or grovelling, fuck that Buster: Only God can judge me and he don't exist, so Rio: Shh, my nan has spidey-sense for blasphemy Rio: I just wanna show everyone how much I love you Rio: I can at this party, yeah Buster: You can do whatever you want at this party, babe Rio: That like just what I need Buster: [a picture of a full crate/case of something expensive that he's bringing to this party] Buster: Nobody's gonna care what we do Rio: 🙌 Rio: you're the best Rio: I'm gonna need to get changed in the car Rio: 'cos not even me puts on a party dress to go have an argument, sadly Buster: Next time I won't tell you to fuck off for less than a tiara and ballgown, like Rio: I appreciate that Buster: I can wait, you know Buster: Without distracting you too much Rio: where Rio: I told you, I already left Buster: But you can go back, if you need to Rio: No I can't, 'cos I'm going to see Dan, remember Rio: not get ready to go out with you Rio: it doesn't matter Buster: You could be making yourself look beautiful for him Rio: Rude to suggest I'm not already Buster: I'm not suggesting that, just that I'm aware how arguments work Rio: That isn't the vibe Buster: You decide what the vibe is, and Nance doesn't need to know Rio: If you're saying I need to then just say it Buster: What? Rio: Put more effort in Rio: 'cos I'm clearly not bothered so Buster: I'm not saying that Buster: Why would I? Rio: I don't know Rio: you tell me Buster: Rio Rio: What? Buster: All I'm ever gonna tell you is how perfect you are Buster: Come on Rio: Do you think I'm going to embarrass you? Buster: No Buster: Don't be stupid Rio: Don't call me stupid Buster: I'm not, I'm saying the idea that I'd ever feel like that 'cause of you is stupid and you know it is Rio: I'm nervous Buster: Tell me Rio: What if someone there knows Rio: it's stupid Buster: We're going there 'cause they don't Buster: Trust me Rio: I do Rio: I just don't want this to end Buster: It won't Buster: No matter what, remember? Rio: Yeah Rio: I know, it'd just be nice if we didn't have to test that theory for a long time yet, wouldn't it Buster: We're not testing it tonight Buster: It's the opposite, a chance for us to be like any other couple Rio: Yeah Rio: okay, I'll stop freaking out now Buster: Freaking out isn't the vibe either, your worries aren't irrational, I wish I could say they are Buster: But like I said, I chose this party over any of the others happening this week for a good reason Buster: You're safe, and so is the secret Rio: You aren't stupid either, obviously Rio: I do know Rio: and I do wanna have a good time with you, so we will Buster: I just wanna give you everything that he can, especially bullshit that gets taken for granted Rio: You don't need to compete with him Rio: or anyone else Buster: There's no competition Buster: Like you said, I ain't stupid Rio: even if we could literally never leave the hotel, I'd be happy, you know Rio: I just like being with you Buster: Yeah, but you need to know that I'm not ashamed of you, I wasn't when we were kids and I'm not now Buster: Whether nobody or everybody knows Rio: I know what I am Rio: and what your friends are like Rio: and girls you're used to Rio: is different Buster: I know what you are Buster: And they're not my friends, you are Buster: As for any girl other than you, you know how I feel and how I don't Rio: I love you Buster: I'm sorry Rio: No, don't be Rio: you've done everything right Buster: I haven't though, it's my fault you feel like I could be anything but flattered that you wanna go anywhere with me Buster: I know what I am too, and what I've done Rio: It's more circumstance Rio: you just played into it Buster: I've been acting like it's Nance who's wrong, for not fitting in, maybe it's me Buster: Maybe I'm actually the weak one Rio: You did what you had to do Rio: I would've done the same Rio: I have Buster: You haven't been cruel, that's just me Rio: I'm no saint, babe Rio: no one is Buster: You're as close as it gets then Rio: You're good, Buster Rio: I know Rio: and I knew Buster: I'm whatever people need me to be Rio: You ain't what you do to survive Buster: That's exactly what I am Buster: Everyone is Rio: I don't think so Buster: 'Cause you want to think that I'm good Rio: No Rio: because that assumes it's never gonna be more than just surviving Rio: it's some lowest common denominator shit Rio: I'd rather look at potential over desperation Rio: any cunt who thinks they'd be a 👼 at their lowest, hasn't ever been that far down Buster: It's not gonna be more than just surviving any time soon Buster: So 'course you'd rather look at potential, who wouldn't? Rio: I'm not going to be defined by my worst Rio: that's not naive optimism Buster: Good, don't be Rio: Why are you then Buster: When you're the best, you're also the worst Rio: I'm not Rio: You can't have it all the ways Buster: You're better than me, that's no secret, babe Buster: I keep telling you Rio: Then I can be worse too Buster: No you can't Rio: Why don't you like yourself Buster: 'Cause you can't please everyone Rio: you should consider yourself Rio: fuck everyone else Buster: That would only get me so far Rio: You don't have to be a dick to get places Rio: I'm aware, it does work Rio: but it's also not a requirement Buster: It is where I live Buster: And as we've established, I won't be leaving for a while Rio: you don't want to end up there Rio: do you? Buster: No Rio: Good Buster: I wanna come home Rio: I like being here too Buster: Remember when I hid Rio: Yeah Rio: and we'd really plan like your parents would just leave without you eventually Buster: Home Alone and Parent Trap really made it seem plausible, to be fair Rio: You were lead well astray with the latter Rio: though you're not also a ginger so that revelation probably wouldn't have happened Buster: I'm not a girl, more importantly, I'm not exactly sure how that's escaped your notice lately Buster: And I've got more chance of becoming one than my parents have of getting divorced at this point Rio: This is true, I remember Rio: it has been a day, you know Rio: my memory fades so fast Buster: Just as well I took more pictures than just the topless ones earlier then, yeah? Buster: [dropping nudes casually] Rio: you're forgiven for holding out on me Rio: just so you know Rio: 🥴 Buster: I said I wouldn't distract you too much Buster: My memory never fades Rio: that's a shame Rio: 'cos there's loads of this convo I'd like you to forget Rio: but we can start with the no distracting rule Buster: I didn't say no, just that you've gotta put clothes on before I can take them off Rio: I suppose that's fair Buster: What are you wearing then? Rio: You can't rip it Rio: it's one of my best dresses Rio: [a picture of it in her bag] Rio: you want me to put it on? Buster: I'll do it Buster: I've stressed you out, it's only right that I calm you down before we get there Buster: Full 👸🏽 treatment Rio: It's not you Rio: but I'm not going to say no or turn that down ever so Buster: You've got the wrong twin if you want any makeup doing though Buster: I only know how to take it off Rio: 😏 I'll survive Rio: though I may put on some to have you do that again Rio: it was so nice Buster: Start with lipstick, I really wanna take that off Rio: ❤️ or 💗? Buster: You tell me Buster: [sends her a pic of his outfit like] Rio: Hmm Rio: You'll look better in pink Buster: Okay Rio: more subtle, I know Rio: but I can leave other marks Buster: Yeah, you can Buster: I'm almost there now Rio: Go faster Buster: I'm not driving Buster: But I'll insist he does Rio: Do Buster: Already done Rio: he must think you're such a twat now Rio: my bad Buster: You're worth getting a lower rating from him for Rio: That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me Rio: 😂 Buster: You're welcome Rio: You can say what you like about my standards on that one Buster: I don't dislike myself that much Rio: Good Rio: 'cos you're my favourite person Rio: and won't have nothing said about my taste Buster: You've got flawless taste, especially in dresses Rio: I knew you'd liked it Buster: I love it Rio: I'm gonna look good for you baby Buster: You do now Rio: but always Buster: You do always Rio: I'll get lazy if you make it this easy, like Buster: You'll still look good then Buster: And I'll still want you Rio: Buster Buster: Yeah? Rio: I'm going to miss you so much Buster: I'll do whatever I can to make sure you don't though Buster: Anything Rio: We both will Rio: people do it, don't they Rio: there must be tips to cope Buster: 'Course Buster: Loads of people meet online and live in different countries, loads further away from each other than we'll be Rio: Exactly Rio: it doesn't always fail, can't do Rio: it's just harder Buster: Even if it does for everyone else, we're not gonna let it for us Rio: No Rio: we can't Buster: We won't Rio: you're too good and no one else is going to look after you properly Buster: Nobody else is gonna look at me or touch me or know me Buster: Only you Rio: I'm yours, in every way a person can be Rio: and I need you, you know Buster: Well, I'm here, so you can have me Rio: here here? Buster: Close your eyes and open them again Buster: You'll see me Rio: [does] Buster: [opens the car door because gentleman] Rio: [the most extra greeting like it's been 1000 years] Buster: [we know he's being as extra it's fine] Rio: [lol at the day you ever get a chatty driver] Buster: [he'd just be rude cos 100% that bitch] Buster: [or they'd do that thing where you try and talk normally and act like nothing is happening even though you're being saucy af] Rio: [that is a mood tbf] Buster: [we should give them a chatty driver one day lol] Rio: [we'll let you live today 'cos you need to get changed so literally as much ignoring as possible tah] Buster: [get you a man who will undress and redress you like he literally is] Rio: [so about it, reckon we probably know how this party will play out now so wanna do easter?] Buster: [yeah we know it's their chance to be extra in front of everyone so I'm down to do easter]