#Ponce Suites

[underwittingly]

draco lucius malfoy's hair throughout the ages because i know he definitely changes his parting every once in a while so he doesn't get bald spots (and also because i cant decide on a parting for him... idk except for the gel hair he looks like a shiny egg)

[ckygetsjobs]

i was watching minghags earlier and only kept watching because of dico in the suit…

i swear man he’s so fucking pretty and rut ru is worth watching the movie for tbh

[dearheartdont]

I love the costuming/character design of Henry vs Alfred.

In their first meeting, we see Alfred as the epitome of the Victorian man: full beard, hat, gloved and buttoned up within an inch of his life. The way he presents himself as much a way to hide as the other parts of heterosexual masculinity he is (over-)performing: a husband to a wife and a police officer.

And then there’s Henry: clean-shaven, fair hair uncovered, collarless and a little dishevelled after a night at the molly house. This divergence from propriety, and the area of Whitechapel he’s frequenting, lead to him immediately being called a ‘ponce’ by a policeman. Which interestingly, Henry doesn’t deny, even in this moment of danger.

When Henry goes to Alfred’s home to ask about the photograph he’s obviously made an effort to look smarter – collared shirt, a matching three piece suit. He’s turned himself into the sort of person that wouldn’t look out of place on Alfred’s street, hiding who he is to fit in, but for the purpose of convincing Alfred to do what is right.

After the séance and the first time they have sex, we see Henry leaving in a panic. He’s hat-less, tie-less, in his shirtsleeves, and conscious of the glances of the ‘decent’ people walking past him. He’s stripped of all the accoutrements of masculinity he can usually hide behind.

In this moment, after he has acknowledged and acted on his attraction to another man, and with all the fear that this brings him, he goes back and scratches his name on the brickwork next to where the body was found. And it feels like Alfred is answering the question he asked Henry about the photographs of the molly house patrons. “Why risk it?” To be seen, to be true to himself even if it doesn’t fit what authority is telling him needs to be done to keep equilibrium. A mark that shows his commitment to the case he has been specifically told to drop.

[wyrmarchives]

Main | Navigation | COD Writing | Send a Request

Tag List! Google Form, doesn’t collect emails

Celebrations Prelude

Series: On The Side

Triggers: Age Gap (Price: 37, reader in early 20s), Cheating, lying, fighting (verbal, and shoving)

MDNI

Now Playing: She’s All I Wanna Be by Tate McRae

I hate her. I really hate her. Platinum blonde, blue eyes, those crow feet to match. A perfect smile. She smiles so sweetly, and you close your eyes when you laugh. Lips pulled to the side and head turned down. She’s not even that funny. Voice shrill like the mean girl on a telly.

I watch when you remove your ring in a bar. How you hold your chin up. Cocky smirk. You know how to pull one in. Tell Ghost it’s just like fishing. Tell me it’s just a joke, that you respect women. You respect Laswell well enough, then turn around and snap my bra strap through my uniform if I hesitate to your beck and call.

I hate her so much. A civilian. She’s tall. You treat her right other than your deployment ventures. She’s your equal right?

I hate her.

She dances well. Pretty white dress. Finally got the bigger rock on her hand. The one you’ve been flaunting around to the guys saying “soon enough.”

I could tell her. Watch your black suit stain red with the wine in her hand. Maybe watch your cheek turn red when she slaps you.

I considered myself a “girl’s girl” until you. Now look at this…

Fucked up.

I’ll lie when you ask too. Say I’m happy for you and your missus. Like you’re a good man.

Maybe the wine’s a bit too helpful to waste on your suit or her dress…

“Rookie, you good?”

“I’m not a rookie anymore, Sarge.” I grumble back taking a sip from the glass. It’s an acquired taste, but when in Rome… God, she drinks red wine. I thought you liked whiskey, John?

“You still are to me.” Kyle banters back, taking a seat at the table. “You’ve been staring.”

“Just foreign is all.” I reply with a small shrug. Nonchalant with a quick commenting frown to pair. “Odd seeing Cap’ acting… Not grumpy. Or bitchy.”

It earns a scoffed laugh. “Right that is. Cap’s always got a bad habit of picking on you, doesn’t he?”

“Let’s see,” I begin to list on my fingers, “first there was pulling my bun down, then there was swapping his hat for mine, then there was stealing my boot laces-“

“You know he was trying to be friendly, right? We’ve been a tight knit group for a while now. Welcoming you was difficult for us, hell, Price most of all more than likely. We’ve worked with women before, but accepting one onto the team? That’s a bit different.”

I roll my eyes. Landing on the love birds of the night. John practically holding her up and sliding her across the floor as she tip toes about. Maybe she doesn’t dance as well as I thought. Is she difficult to lead? I scoff. Adorable.

“It’s the truth, lass. Best not take to heart. Honest, the Scouser’s chuffed about you. Thinks you’re a right addition.” His glass raised to toast singularly as John glances at us. “Tell me, lass, you think our Captain actually wanted this big show?” His finger taps his glass.

My head snaps. Brows furrowed with careful thought. “But that’s his wife.” I nod to the pair.

Kyle looks at me. His signature bitch face. A brilliant treat. “Right, she is. A right ponce in my opinion…” He trails off. “Maybe the drink is a tad much.” He downs his glass and stands. “Give me a bell if you need. Don’t let him get to you.”

“Plastered, mate?”

“Not yet, Rookie.” The snicker is quick as he walks away to talk with the single guests. He’s definitely up for it tonight.

Celebration. That’s the point of weddings.

Looking down the bottom of my glass isn’t too far. Maybe I’ll find my celebration there… or along the dotted lines of my transfer papers…

I look back up. Maybe it’s the liquor courage, or the fact that none of it matters so much to me anymore. A toast would do some good.

I rise. A knife sounds my glass. Sharp but classy tink ringing through the air. My glass raised high with rosy cheeks and warm smile.

“To the bride. She’s got everything that I don’t have. She’s all I wanna be so bad. Perfect smile and personality inside and out to match.” I bite down the truth. “To the beautiful Heather. A woman with a heart of gold to love a man like John. May he treat you right, and your marriage be a happy one. Cheers!”

John crosses his arms, shrugging with his snarky smirk. I wanna wipe it off his face. “Orders.”

“You know, I could report you for abuse of power.” I challenge.

“You could. You won’t.”

“Why do you do this? What’s the point? You could have me removed from the team, Captain.”

“Just a bit of fun-“

“Bullshit.” I cut off. “Don’t give me that shit. You don’t treat anyone else like this.”

“Other people aren’t on my team, Rookie-“

“Lance Corporal.” I correct. “I get I’m new, but how the fuck am I supposed to be anything if I don’t get a chance? I worked hard. I graduated top of my class. I got a chance to be apart of the ‘big leagues’. I try my fucking hardest, Sir. Where the hell do you get off on harassing me? Just taking the piss, are you? Fucking bullshit-“

“You know you have a mouth on you, Lance Corporal.” He steps up. Towering over me in the small office. “You should learn to shut it.”

I straighten myself. “Yes, Captain.”

He scoffs, rounding his desk and plopping into the seat. It’s silent for a few moments. I, waiting for orders, and him, waiting to sort through his thoughts. “Were you going to tell her?”

“Sir?”

“The wedding toast.”

A beat. “No. I just thought that the red wine would look proper on your tux. Would’ve been a waste of money.”

“Good. Don’t forget, you’re convenient. I won’t leave her for you. You’re on the side.”

Star border by @cafekitsune | Border link: here

Music Divider by @thecutestgrotto | Divider link: here

[nerds-yearbook]

G.I. Joe the Movie was released on August 14, 1987. It was meant to be a theatrical release, see the death of Duke (Michael Bell), and have a topless scene with Zarana (Lisa Raggio). The production went longer than predicted so the Transformers movie was released first, which ended up having a huge impact on the Joe movie. Because Transformers the Movie underperformed in the theaters, it was decided to release the Joe movie as a direct to video and TV presentation. Because the Transformers movie recieved so much backlash from killing Optimus Prime (Peter Cullen), dialogue was added explaining Duke didn't die but went into a coma. The topless scene was story boarded but the scene was altered in the final film with a swim top. Most of the new characters introduced were the new recruits (Lt Falcon - Don Johnson, Kunoichi Jinx - Shuko Akune, Chuckles, Law - Ron Ortiz and Order, Big Lob - Brad Sanders, and Tunnel Rat - Laurie Faso), Sgt Slaughter's (Robert Remus), Renegades (Mercer - Kristoffer Tabori, Red Dog - Poncie Ponce, and Taurus - Earn Boen) and the mutants from Cobra-La (Pythona - Jennifer Darling, Golobulus - Burgess Meredith, and Nemesis Enforcer - Cullen). As Cobra Commander (Christopher Collins/Chris Latta) was facing a mutiny by Dr Mindbender(Brian Cummings), Baroness (Morgan Lofting), Destro (Arthur Burghardt), Zartan (Zack Hoffman), Tomax (Corey Burton) and Xamot (Bell), Pythona arrived and convinced Cobra to steal the BET device. The mission failed, Serpentor was captured, and Cobra Commander retreated his forces to Cobra-La. There Golobulus revealed that Cobra Commander was an escapee from Cobra-La. Also that Cobra-La had secretly manipulated Dr Mindbender into creating Serpentor (Dick Gautier). While Lt Falcon was court martialed by the Joes, Cobra Commander was put on trial in Cobra-La. The movie also featured the familiar Joes and Cobras Low Light (Charlie Adler), Wet Suit (Jack Angel), Blow Torch, Lift-Ticket (both Bell), Motorviper (Gregg Berger), Iceberg (Burghardt), Beach Head (William Callaway), Quick Kick (Francois Chau), Zandar (Cullen), Dial-Tone (Hank Garrett), Hawk (Ed Gilbert), Slip Stream (Dan Gilvezan), Roadblock (Kene Holiday), Bazooka (John Hostetter), Doc (Buster Jones), Gung Ho, Ripper, Televiper (all Latta), Lady J ( Mary McDonald-Lewis), Letherneck (Chuck McCann), Cross-Country (Michael McConnohie), Snow Job (Rob Paulsen), Mainframe (Patrick Pinney), Flint (Bill Ratney), Buzzer, Shipwreck, Monkeywrench, Hector Remirez (all Neil Ross), Thrasher (Ted Schwartz), Scarlett (B.J. Ward), Alpine (Lee Weaver), Torch, Wild Bill (both Frank Welker), Lifeline (Stan Wojno), and Jackson Beck as the narrator. ("G.I. Joe the Movie", Movie, Event)

[fandomwritingbit]

A Random Act of Kindness.

michael afton x afab reader

A/n: Wanted to do something for Mike because even though Will is my cup of tea, Mike is a hot chocolate that I’m sometimes partial to. Reader is the dominant one in interactions, Mike following her/your lead, enjoy!

No warnings, it’s fluff and bad flirting lmao but if you squint Michael is kinda obsessed

You know, he saw you every damn day.

Driving home from the pizzeria slap-bang in the middle of the rush-hour traffic, Michael would find himself watching you walking home in his rear-view, then in front as he remained stationary for well too bloody long. Sometimes he’d be there for ages queuing up, resisting the urge to be a knob and just pull a U-ie to get the heck out of dodge, like he’d seen a fair few do. But to be honest he liked watching you walk down the road. 

It's not just that you’re pretty and he was being a perv, it was just something about how you walked. Like you owned the street or some shit, confident as any teen in full underarmour, a proper billy big bollocks. 

He concluded after the first few times that you must work somewhere nearby. Some kind of salesperson, judging by the suit and overconfidence. The smug smile, too. One time he’d seen you cross the road during the stand-still, and some silly cock in front of him honked, it made no sense, you weren’t inconveniencing them in any way, but they slammed it on like you were trying to cross the M25. His own brow fell in confusion as he watched you stop right in front of their car, raising your hands into a shrug. A damn-near contagious smirk of disbelief on your face. You stood in front long enough for it to be awkward before walking off, still smirking away, and he liked you for that, he would never have the confidence to do that kind of thing.

~ 

Now was no different. Oh except for the rain, which was mental, pelting hard against his window. He’d just missed it, luckily, so his umbrella sat in the footwell dry as a bone. But longer into his drive, it picked up bad. As such, he didn’t expect to see you walking. 

When he saw you, wet-through with your air matted to your skin, your blazer limp with wet, he laughed. God, you poor thing, it looked bloody brutal. Still managing to walk well directly against the pelting rain, he did notice that you were walking with a pressed-lipped smile, clearly amused at your own sorry state. But as he watched you gain on him, he glanced at the umbrella on the floor. He didn’t need it, but then again, neither did you. It was much too late.  

Yet as you get closer to his vehicle, the traffic remains completely rooted which causes him to feel an increasing itch to shout you over. When you finally caught his position, the urge was overwhelming. He wanted to help, be your knight in shining armour, and all that... Well, to be honest, he just wanted to talk to you, you're almost a celebrity to him.

You were so distracted trying to keep the rain out of your eyes and your hair from engulfing your face, that the car window in front of you rolling down was nothing. As was the hand jammed out trying to wave at you, completely missed. It was only when the man inside the vehicle called out that you looked to the side, a certain gesture already crossing your mind. For fuck’s sake, it was Baltic out and you're wet through, talking to some ponce wasn't an attractive thought.

But when he calls out again, you hiss a plethora of insults as you walk over to his window, you’d better recognise him or some shit, if you don’t he’ll have hell to pay. Who the fuck would cat call in this type of weather? 

You bend at the waist to peer inside the car, brows instantly narrowing when you realise that his guy is a stranger. 

He’s about to speak but you get there first, “Do I know you?” Your tone is on the line between rude and enquiring, largely because you’re still being pelted by the rain. 

 “No. Look sorry, you look tortured. Can I give you my umbrella?” It takes him a bit too long to get the words out, nervous to be actually talking to you. When he finishes the question and gestures to the item on the passenger-side floor, you straight up laugh.

“I think it’s a bit late for that.” you chuckle, lifting your arms to demonstrate how the water ran off you. 

Man, he felt like an idiot, he knew you’d say that but couldn’t help but ask, now he looks damned stupid. “Yeah, sorry. I just thought, I’d offer...” he pauses, internally debating whether to say the next bit, deciding to go for it to kill the awkward silence. “I’d happily give you a lift but you’d be pretty stupid to get in my car- not because I’m dangerous or anything! I-”

He stops talking when you continue laughing, more than amused by his rambling, a small respite in this damned weather. Honestly, who was this guy? He’s clearly shy as hell, can’t even meet your eye without blushing. 

“I got what you meant and no, I wouldn’t get in a stranger’s car. But... I think it was nice of you to offer. Provided you don’t want to murder me.” He manages a self-deprecating smile, thank God you were being so nice to him. “Still, looking at this traffic, I’ll probably get home before you.” 

He sighs, still looking close to devastated. “Sorry to stop you, I didn’t mean to waste your time.” 

“Weirdly, I’m okay with it.” You say, grinning with disbelief, you were ready to give him a mouthful a few moments ago, but seeing how embarrassed he looked was kind of cute, it clearly took all his bollocks and then some to shout you over… To be fair this fella was cute in general, with his messy hair and pretty blue eyes. “Well, wouldn’t want to miss your light. See you uh... Mike” 

When you said his name butterflies invaded his stomach, and it took him a minute to figure out how you knew it, only revealed by the ducking of your head to read his name tag. “Yeah uh, see you...” he went silent hoping you would fill in the blank and tell him your name, he’d just love to put a name to your celebrity. 

Lifting your lapel slightly, you let him read your own name tag and he smiles. A big genuine smile that makes you drop your cock-sure smirk for one of your own. He is bloody cute.

~

Since your meet-cute, Michael found himself doubly looking for you every evening when he drove home from work, each time practically bouncing in his seat. No longer was it solely him admiring your form and swagger. Now you reciprocated, picking his licence plate out among the stationary vehicles to give him a wave or come over for a, albeit brief, chat. 

He couldn’t quite believe it, if he told his friends he would be met with giggling, it was nothing really, just an acquaintanceship with someone, but to him it was something special. And he hoped it was for you as well.

~ 

“Hey, y/n!” he called out, a little over a week later, already involuntarily smiling before you came over to his window. He waited till you were properly in ear shot before continuing. “You alright?” 

You oblige him absolutely beaming, you bend to look into the car, “I, Mike, am absolutely brilliant. Yourself?” 

He chuckles, “Yeah okay, clearly not in as good a mood as you. Something good happened?” 

“Just landed a huge account at work.” You jump to tell him, pride very evident, “I can’t wait to go back to my flat and tell the empty rooms all about it.” You giggle. 

Grinning, he congratulates you, trying to keep the heat from his cheeks, "Not going out to celebrate?” 

“Not unless you’re offering.” You look at him through your eyelashes and he swears that if you keep your gaze like that his heart was going to jump out of his chest. “...Cos I would say yes, you know.” 

Sweet lord, he has to work to keep his excitement buried. You had just, very cockily, asked him out. Like out out. To have a drink. With you. He tries not to pounce all over his answer. “Yeah, I mean, yes. I’m free, if you want to go for a drink or something?” 

You let yourself smile again as he stammered over his words. “Lovely... So are we going now? Cos you’ll have to unlock your door to let me in.” His eyes go wide a little as he rushes to press the button that would do as you asked, still reeling from excitement as you open his car door. 

“...We’ll uh be waiting ages to get out of this street, what with the rush hour.” 

“Doesn’t matter, gives us a chance to get to know each other properly.” You speak as you fasten your seatbelt, placing your briefcase in the footwell. Then you turn to your date, “Plus if it wasn’t for the traffic I wouldn’t have met you, can’t complain too much.”

[keicordelle]

I will never be over how Endwalker just destroyed Emmanellain's characterization. They needed a waifish, damsel in distress comedic relief character, and they just ignored all of his 3.x character development to do it! They just slapped him in there to be a pretty boy noble who doesn't want to be there, when post-Heavensward Emmanellain is so much more than that.

Like yes, that's very much what he was at the start of the game. He didn't want to fight, or take life particularly seriously, and he wasn't really good at the things his family wanted him to be good at.* He was flighty and immature and completely willing to just go through life riding on the coattails of his brother and getting by on his family name. No one expected much from him, and he was perfectly content with that status quo. He is a comedic caricature of a pretty boy noble there, so incompetent that he's assigned his own houseboy to keep him in line.

But all that changes post-Heavensward. He's thrust into a position where suddenly he has to take charge, and make decisions, and he's not ready for it. He makes the wrong call, and he blames others for it, as he's always done. And then he experiences the consequences for his actions. And it's still someone else who suffers for them! It's Honoroit who gets beat up, not Emmanellain himself! But it forces him to own up to his shortcomings in a way he's never bothered to before. (Thancred's fist and the imposing WoL certainly help with that too, of course.) He's given an ultimatum, and he steps up!

And of course he's not going to magically become a clone of Artoirel and get super serious and become an amazing knight. That's not who he is, and that's not where his skills lay. But he's trying. When you talk to him after that, he tells you about his training regiment, and how he's still not much good with a sword and how he'll never be like Haurchefant, but he's working on it, and he's training regularly and not skipping out on it like he used to. And when he takes over Camp Dragonhead, he treats the role with all the gravity it's due. Even Artoirel says he's impressed with him and how seriously he's taking it!

And then he shows back up in Endwalker and it's like they've just erased all that character development and turned him back into a useless ponce. He's not there because he wants to be, he's there because his brother commanded it and he had no choice. And, idk, but the Emmanellain I'd come to love wouldn't have stressed that so hard. Even if it had been Artoirel's suggestion, even if he knew he wasn't suited for the task, 3.x Emmanellain would have taken the role seriously and done his best in whatever capacity he can. While still being a flirty comic relief character.

Like, I love Emmanellain and Sicard, but damn I wish they hadn't destroyed my boy to bring them together.

*However, that doesn't mean he wasn't good at anything, or that his skills were useless! He's very adept socially, and he knows all sorts of rumors and all sorts of people. We see it during the riots in 3.1 in particular, where he knows people who knows people. There's merit to being a well connected gossip in high society! Just because he's not good with a sword doesn't mean he's useless! And he himself goes through a whole arc of self discovery where he realizes his skills are, in fact, skills.

[titsgirlbuffy]

hey sorry if you've gotten a million alerts about me liking way too many of your posts!! i'm currently rewatching Buffy and Angel for the first time in over a decade (i first watched both shows between ages 10 and 13 so this has been an eye opening rewatch) and the hyperfixation has returned big time! I've been scouring the internet for meta and all of yours that i've read resonate with me a lot.

if you ever feel like writing them out (no pressure of course!) i'd love to read some more of your gay Wesley thoughts -- i've also always read him as gay, and i have such a strange time going into his tag on tumblr because soooo much of it is Wes/Lilah content. i'm particularly curious about your thoughts on how a gay reading of Wesley impacts his storylines with Lilah, Fred, and maybe Virginia. also sorry if all this is weird from a non-Buffy-blog stranger!!

Omg Thank You for sending this! It’s been sitting in my inbox for a while cause I needed to actually think about it in words rather than just. Autistic screeching. And also cause I wanted to see more of the Wesley/Lilah relationship to make sure my first thoughts weren’t totally baseless (if anything they’re being proven further). Just watched Apocalypse Now-ish so there’s probably later stuff I’d add in if I’d seen the whole show.

I’m really surprised by how many fans read him as straight (no offense but we have different eyes). Wesley’s coded as queer pretty often – part of it’s just the queer-coding of the Buffyverse supernatural in general (see This Old Gang of Mine for a questionable but really clear-cut example), but there’s also tons where it’s him specifically (in Sanctuary where the council’s kill squad call him out on his “perverted” relationship with Angel and also call him a ponce, Wesley stopping Angel in that same episode before the fight to make sure he knows he gave up a chance to go home and be accepted by his father and culture For Angel, multiple times in season one when outsiders assume he and Angel are together, that time Angel gets possessed by an old guy who assumes Wesley is his boyfriend and tries to let him down gently but freaks out when Wesley goes to touch him… etc etc etc). Plus the way he looked up to Angel in early seasons absolutely comes across as a crush, he and Gunn were So into each other but Wesley especially was repressed about it (running theme, man radiates internalised homophobia), and all his relationships with women… well, there’s Layers going on.

So his early relationship with Cordelia was the first time (if you don’t count just. Looking at him) I solidly thought Wesley must be gay, rather than any other label. To me that’s absolutely a comphet relationship on his part. The crucial parts of the Cordelia/Wesley relationship is that 1. He sees himself as “a bad, bad man” for wanting to pursue anything with Cordelia, and as such 2. She is completely unattainable, but 3. When it’s proven that she’s Not unobtainable actually, the relationship falls apart the instant they try to do anything about it. He’s attracted to Cordelia because it’s a safely straight crush where he’s not Allowed to actually follow through on anything (and panics the moment he does anyway), and to an extent because a relationship would give him a reason to stay in California.

I headcanon Wesley as actually working out that he’s gay between seasons 1 and 2 – purely because he’s the one who introduces the group to Caritas and was visiting it between seasons, which… do I need to explain why Caritas is a gay bar? Please feel to ask me to explain that if anyone doesn’t get it, but for now, trust me, as a frequenter of gay karaoke bars, Caritas is 100% a gay karaoke bar. This is also around the time he starts dressing differently, stops wearing multi-piece fully buttoned suits year round in California. He’s getting more comfortable being himself.

Which all makes his relationship with Virginia really interesting. They met when he was mimicking Angel’s Straight Man Persona (literally in the same episode where Angel was getting therapy and being told that his manly persona is an act and that it’s hurting him. Yeah), and I’m not totally sure if she was a beard or a purposefully chosen Public Relationship. She was a billionaire socialite – again, Wesley’s internalised homophobia is off the charts, and this is a relationship that got into the papers (and would definitely get back to his family, if they made any effort to look). Sidenote, I’m genuinely certain that he was just homeless until they got together. Wesley is established as Broke™, starts dating a billionaire, and suddenly has a large swank apartment? In LA? I am simply drawing connections. So yeah, while I’m undecided about how much Virginia knew this, their relationship reads as one based on public persona and just social climbing generally.

Fred’s the most complicated of his relationships with women. The rivalry with Gunn is probably a part of it, but actually I think a bigger part is Billy. As in, Billy, the guy who made any guy who touched him (or his blood, sorry Wes) become violently misogynistic. Side eyeing the writers for that one, but still, it Really fucked Wesley up. Fred was fine, she doesn’t blame him, but after the spell wore off Wesley literally hid in his room for a week then told her “I don’t know what kind of man I am anymore” then Cut His Hair Short Again. Some sort of closeness to Fred had been alluded to before this (protecting her in This Old Gang Of Mine despite her very much being able to protect herself, suddenly being given an interest in science despite being a linguist), but that was really the turning point for this being a textual Attraction. Even then, similar to the Cordelia thing, Wesley never makes a move (assuring everyone who asked that he would when he was ready. Okay), and when he talks about it, it’s an attraction to a Fred that literally doesn’t exist.

Fred doesn’t need anyone making a shovel talk on her behalf – she can and will just kill them herself (at the point I’m at, she and Gunn might break up because He killed someone when she’d wanted to do it on her own). There was a great moment when Lilah dressed up as “Fred”, complete with schoolgirl outfit and glasses, and the shot cut to Fred, hair down, glasses free, ready to hunt a ghost with Gunn. The irony is that the Fred who actually Does exist has way more in common with Wesley (it’s honestly just the gender that’s the issue here), but in a combo of self hatred and need to redeem himself post-Billy, Wesley’s created this sweet innocent young scientist who he needs to Protect™. Is that love? Well, he didn’t make a move when he thought it was.

I can see why people like his relationship with Lilah. They’re awful. Literally the first time they slept together it was because Wesley was So depressed and was hoping he wouldn’t regret it until the morning (didn’t work. Regretted it instantly). He doesn’t have a job, and Lilah’s trying to recruit him to W&H. I said, the second time we saw them on screen, that he was prostituting himself. I was joking! But uh. Canon jokes about how “giving” Lilah is. Expensive bribes (“gifts”, Lilah insists) Wesley could never afford. He makes a bet with her for ONE DOLLAR, loses, she MAKES HIM SIGN THE DOLLAR, and then LEAVES IT WITH HIM. They’re in bed for this. I just. I was joking. I wasn’t expecting an actual scene of them in bed with a dollar bill between them. What the fuck. Anyway, that aside, he really does just hate himself right now, tangibly depressed post-baby-theft, and Lilah is There. Caritas doesn’t exist any more and there’s no plausible deniability in a non-demon gay bar.

Thanks again for reading my stuff @lostupst8 <3 never apologise for spamming me, I crave attention

[doonarose]

But also, 14, you've clearly been settling in for a while here, at some point I do hope Donna points out you need to get some different clothes because, like, that's what normal people do. And it's one thing to be hopping all over time and space in the same outfit, but to be poncing around London, hanging out with the same people over and over, people will start to think you're weird. And it is weird to have a bunch of exactly the same suit, like you aren't just miracling that clean, you have identical copies of the same suit, weirdo, at least get slightly different suits, and something more comfortable for watching the telly in. And like exercise, just for exercise's sake, not keeping fit by running from aliens, but learning how to go jogging because it's good for him and the looks he'd get going hell-for-leather down the street in his stupid bloody suit. Also that buttons going to continue to ping off at every opportunity, maybe just leave it off.

[clonewarsarchives]

Clone Wars Magazine Comics #6.10 “Suited” (Aug 2010) [reprinted in U.S. #3, Mar/Apr 2011]

story by Rik Hoskin, art by Andres Ponce

[oswanily]

There’s a rabbit in the house. Thankfully for that rabbit, Ponce is not here right now, or there would have been rabbit stew for dinner (maybe, hunting is not Ponce’s strongest suit).

[fablewritesnonsense]

Snippet Saturday

Got tagged by @thefallenangelsgang for this. Had to shift through my WIPs to find something worth posting that wasnt spoilery af but here we go!

This snippet is from my WIP currently titled Spilling Tea, which is going to be about my Courier and her fun little jaunt through the Mojave. It does include spoilers for chapter 69 and 71 of Nuclear Family so proceed with caution if you haven't read them yet

No pressure tags for @andyandnormski @jackiegaytona @bardic-inspo @justaduckarts

She'd gotten old and sloppy, and now some ponce in a checkered suit and a group of Khans had managed to capture her. She sighed, and the jackass in the ugly ass suit turned to look at her. He started jabbering on, but she didn't care to listen.

All things considered, it was a good run. Nine years of freedom from the Institute surrounded by good people. Good people that she'd never get to say goodbye to. But she'd rather die a human than be decommisioned as a courser.

"The truth is, the game was rigged from the start," Checkered Suit said.

"You don't have to tell me," Tea sighed as he raised his gun. She turned her head as his finger squeezed the trigger. No matter what, she was not going down with a bullet between her eyes.

[the-replacemints]

Breve Pausa

Martín Espada

—for Juan Antonio Corretjer and Consuelo Lee Tapia

In the photograph, the poet leans over to kiss his wife. He wears a black suit and a black tie, as if there will be a ceremony and a medallion hung around his neck. His hair is white and crowns the back of his head. Her hair is white in waves. She lifts her face to kiss him through his white mustache.

This is a despedida. They are kissing goodbye. The charge is conspiracy again. The officers born years after his first incarceration lead him away to Castillo de Ponce. The officers lead her away to the women’s prison at Vega Alta.

The evidence is in the poetry. As the convoy of the empire’s army rumbles in the dark, past the mountain town where one day they will be buried side by side, the poet says to his beloved: Esta es pausa / para el amor. Es sólo / breve pausa. The poet watches her sleep. This is a pause / for love. It’s only / a brief pause.

[idabbleincrazy]

Ante Up

Fandom: Angel (Buffyverse)

Rating: T

Pairing: Spike/Angel

Characters: Spike, Angel, Wesley

Word Count: 704

Warnings: Crack fic, humor, confusion

Summary: Angel is confused, Spike is pissed that he's been had, and Wes gives good face.

A/N: this is what my muse came up with for the prompts 'Poker face' and 'confused' for 1_million_words on LJ.

"You what!?!" 

Angel crowded Spike against the office wall, his brow furrowed in angry confusion. Spike simply rolled his eyes and shoved the elder vampire away, nudging him towards the elevator.

"I won you, mate. Now c'mon and get your broody arse upstairs."

"Stop pushing me. What do you mean, you won me?"

Spike sighed dramatically as Angel whirled on him and planted his feet firmly, refusing to budge.

"In the poker game last night. Perce put you in the ante and I won with a full house. So shift it. You're mine for the next twenty-four hours an' I want you up in that posh suite of yours, naked and willing."

Angel stalked over to his desk and pressed a button on his phone, yelling into the receiver once the other line clicked on.

"Wesley! Get your ass in here!" Angel disconnected the call before Wesley could even respond.

Less than a minute later, the ex-Watcher walked into the office, his face neutral as he looked between the two vampires. 

"You wished to speak to me, Angel?"

"Damn right, I want to speak to you! What the hell were you thinking? You can't bet people, Wes! Out of almost everyone in this godforsaken building, you're the one I would least expect something like this from."

Wesley pushed his glasses higher on his nose, thoroughly unperturbed by Angel's ranting.  

"As you've pointed out in the past, you're not people, Angel. At any rate, I didn't actually expect to lose, and definitely not to Spike." 

"Yeah, ponce thought I was bluffin'."

Angel let out a soft growl in Spike's direction.

"Quite", Wes continued, his features still calmly blank. "Besides, it's not as though he can really make you do anything you don't already want to do."

"Oi!"

"Hey!"

"Oh, do let's stop pretending, yes? I swear, for two centuries-old creatures, you both still act so incredibly childish at times, especially around each other. Let me guess, Spike, you've already made some overly crude hint as to how you plan to spend your twenty-four hours with Angel?"

"Wasn't crude."

"Naked and willing? I wouldn't exactly call that demure, Spike." Angel glared at him from behind his desk. "Maybe if you'd worded it better, I wouldn't be so pissed."

Spike quirked a brow in his direction, lips pursed in a thoughtful pout.

"The fact that it's taken a bloody poker game to get either of you to even attempt to admit you want the other just proves how thick the pair of you truly are sometimes. The entire office can see it, the looks, the lingering touches when you’re handing each other weapons before you head out on a hunt. The way you both pull your punches when you’re fighting each other so as to prevent any real damage." Wesley shook his head. "There's even a betting pool on when the two of you will finally pull your heads out of your arses and just get it bloody over with, and one on who'll make the first move.”

Spike made a sound of gross indignance, and Angel gaped at Wesley, a small twitch starting in one eye. 

“Mm-hmm, precisely as I figured. Please, both of you, just use the ready excuse of this circumstance and get over yourselves. Angel, it would do you a world of good if you just let Spike drag you upstairs and have his wicked way with you. I think we all know your soul is in no danger with another vampire, no chance he’ll let you feel perfect happiness. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve matters to discuss with the secretarial sector.”

The two vampires watched in silence as Wesley left, closing the door behind him. After a minute they turned to each other, both with quizzical looks on their faces. 

“Since when does Wes have anything to do with the steno pool -”

“Y’know, when I won, he never did show his hand…”

“You don’t think…?”

“Son of a bitch!” Spike looked back out the window facing the lobby, just in time to see Wesley passing by, putting his wallet back in his pocket. “That bloody wanker! Well, one thing’s for certain, Peaches, your mystic has a hell of a poker face.”

~~~~~

All Things Spike: @leatafanfiction​ @captain-peroxid3​

[ckygetsjobs]

why are you wearing that 

Dico x gn reader

A/n: Idk how to put warnings for this but. Ig name calling? It’s like one time but some may find it insulting. NSFW warning (like it’s literally the plot). Me and my horrible writing skills. Another self indulgent piece. This isn’t even what I was originally going to write about.

You weren’t sure what he was up to while he was filming for minghags, but he would be gone for long hours. He’d always come back in a ridiculous outfit that he was in when he was in character, like Ponce, or even Robin Hood (you didn’t even ask about that one, you didn’t want to know). You were snacking on another unhealthy food, not even bothering checking the calories, you didn’t give a shit. You were bored out of your mind, hoping his ass was going to be home soon. No luck though, hours and hours passed, you weren’t sure what time it was at this point but probably some time after two am. He finally waltzed his fucking late as hell ass into the living room. You couldn’t believe what he was wearing. You didn’t even know if you should laugh or question him if he was crying for help. So you opted out of both and instead just stared into his eyes which were kinda obscured by the thick black framed glasses he had on. You had never seen him wear glasses, fake or not, but you admit he looked really good in them. His black wig curled and fell a little bit into his eyes as he tried to fix it, letting out a lot of fucks and a long string of sighs. You weren’t going to let him suffer with it forever, no matter how amusing you may have found it. You styled it where it didn’t fall into his face and he just looked a lot more relaxed now, but he also looked like he was up to something, which you absolutely didn’t want to deal with right now. He sat on the couch, clearly waiting on something you didn’t know about yet. 

His tie was undone and his suit was wrinkled, making him look like a frightening mess. He usually cleaned himself well in a sense, other times he was just filthy, you weren’t expecting much given the history he had to get caked in food. His clothes weren’t dirty this time, he just looked like he had been through hell. “Well, aren’t you going to offer to take my clothes off?,” he asked with a god awful voice, really annoying but also really sexy. He had sex appeal, of course he always had, but especially right now, you played along for the fun of it. “All you had to do was ask baby,” you whispered at him, grabbing for the belt of his pants, throwing it onto the floor and pulling his pants half way down. Untying his tie and taking off the rest of his outfit until he was just in his blue and white boxers, having a sneer look on his face that was getting bigger and more alarming the further you got into whatever horrible thing he had planned for the rest of the night. It wasn’t going to be dark out for much longer, but that didn’t concern you much, you’d still fuck him, the situation was the same, the dark was just more fun. The couch squeaked as he hopped to get his pants fully off, throwing his shoes far away, and he’d probably end up searching for them in the morning when he had to go back to filming. 

“Lie down” he instructed, not being nice about it whatsoever. You listened, silently sinking into the couch, staring up at him as he was on his knees above you, brushing his fingers through your hair. “You’re being a good whore,” he said next, taking his dick out. Him telling you to open your mouth wrung in your ears as you struggled to put it all in your mouth at once, but he was very good at helping as he gently coaxed you into it. Once it was all in your mouth you just began to suck and suck, he moaned and held tightly onto your hand, to keep him grounded and to touch you more. He began to thrust, it was quick, he had no interest in waiting that was for sure. “How’s it feel to suck off Rut Ru? Pretty fucking great,” he already answered the question himself, not leaving a chance to disagree. “You are good,” you said a response anyway, and the answer seemed to please him as he was going harder and more smoother than before. You just kept going, letting him say rude ass shit and hear him go on and on about being rich. As he finally came into your mouth he told you to swallow, you did it without hesitation. He tasted so good, you’d do it on any occasion, even if he didn’t ask. Just felt hotter when he did ask, especially as this Rut Ru character. When he put his dick back into boxers he just laid his almost naked body on top of you. You held onto him, making sure he was secure and wouldn’t fall off the couch, it wasn’t big enough for two people really but you made it work. He kissed your cheek, giving you a soft gaze, you could also tell he was very sleepy. Not even that long later, he fell asleep, his hushed snores escaping his mouth. He was tired long before all that but he still did it anyways. You had to give him credit, he was still amazing as hell, and you definitely wanted to do this again. You closed your eyes and let the dark drift you off to sleep with your arms still holding him, but now just a little bit tighter. 

[neophytepagan]

My current bg3 playthro is a fun chaotic mess i went and made it so everyone had a class different from their original one. Wyll is a paladin and it suits him so perfectly. Astarion is a bard, gale is a sorceror, lae'zel is a monk, karlach is a ranger with a big pet dog. Wyll practically already has an oath of devotion so it just enhances his roleplay having the chivalrous paladin options in dialogue now. Also wyll running in and dunking the shit out of enemies with the distelled holy power of 1000 suns while his ponce bard boyfriend plays a little ditty to empower him is just splendid