#Optimus is indeed dead in this AU but he’s still around

[witchysolfan]

Sari calling Optimus “Uncle Oppy” when she visits the land of dreaming and encounters him there. The dead leader that now rests in peace.

The first time Sari came, she sensed she may disrupt his dreaming with her presence and started to leave but a voice called out to her. Red met blue and a soft, inviting smile beckons her to come closer. The girl coming over and is greeted by the dreamer.

“Your dreams are beautiful…” she told him, keeping eye contact. “I’m sorry for interrupting.”

“It’s of no consequence young one.” The gentle voice was deep and kind. Sari knew he would tell great bed time stories like her Papa used to do. “You wouldn’t have come here if you weren’t invited.”

The little girl quirked her head.

“This is my dream. I can welcome or deny entry to anyone here. I sensed you near, and I decided to let you in.” An old sadness enters his optics. Though at peace in death’s embrace, he still feels for others. He still holds on to his compassion in comforting others, especially the young.

“You have been through much, Sari.”

Sari swallowed thickly.

“Have you told your Dad how much you truly hurt inside?”

She shook her head.

“I’m…a big kid…I don’t…need to worry him.” She was careful in blanking her face. Hiding away deep inside, not thinking of how she feels.

If she feels too much, her powers start to react.

If she feels too strongly, she will ruin things and scare people. It’s fun sometimes to scare people but….not like…that. Not the way she scared her Dad.

She bowed her head.

Optimus reached up one finger to slowly lift her chin up to look at him.

“It’s alright, Sari. Your Dad loves you.” There was something on his face that flickered. An old sorrow, a relief, a grief of so much loss, an acceptance of how things are now. “Your Dad….has come far in doing the best for you. He will understand.”

Sari began to speak, saying her Dad did not have these dark thoughts. These ugly feelings of wanting to rage, give into burning anger of perceived injustice, to revel in frightened faces she saw as evil and make so many pay for what they have done. To her. To Papa. To Dad. To everyone she loves.

There was great rage in Sari as much as there was great fear and hurt.

It was frightening.

It was ugly.

It was violet.

Burning, terrible, violet.

“He understands. This rage is familiar to him….he knows it.”

Red eyes widened up at him.

“Please, talk to your Dad. He will understand you more than anyone.” He let go of her chin and slowly curled his hand around her, his thumb pressed softly to her head. “It is alright to cry.”

Something broke inside and the rivers flooded with the growing cries of a little girl struggling with herself. Clinging to the thumb and hiccuped in her crying.

Optimus silently let her vent in hand as the field of flowers from earth surrounded them.

It will take Sari a bit longer to come to her Dad about her emotions and black rage she struggles with, but she has the dreamer to help her with each visit until then.

Optimus smiled at calling him “Uncle Oppy” the first time. The flower crown she made resting on his head.

If her silly stories on the shenanigans that goes on the Lost Light caused much amusement to the dreamer, then perhaps it is worth having his dreams interrupted by her visits. Even though she never visited too many times and never stays for long, a thoughtful gesture from the child who knew how much her ‘Uncle Oppy’ valued this peaceful rest, Optimus had come to look forward to seeing the child. Wondering what stories she will bring next time.

[thewildwaffle]

Kidnapped Rival

So I’ve posted this Transformers au fic on Ao3 and have been writing it since Feb of last year ever since I saw an anonymous post on @zenxenophilia​‘s blog. I finally finished it, over a year and a half later.

You can read it here on Ao3, and I’ll also post the story here

Original post - submitted to Zenxenophilia on tumblr by anonymous: ***** ***** ***** Imagine a human on Optimus’ team. Optimus practically treats them like a sparkling, Ratchet is their grandpa and Bee and Arcee are like siblings. This human wants to fight in the war. For earth, for humans, for their family. Of course, Cybertron’s atmosphere is dangerous to humans making it difficult for the human to get involved. After begging and pleading to Optimus the human is put under extensive training with self defense and handling a weapon (thanks to Bee and Arcee). The human is outfitted with a mech suit disguised as a cybertronian. Even inside the mech the human has an armored space suit along with a blaster that can filter oxygen out of Cybertron's atmosphere just in case the mech were to break. It doesn’t take long for the human to climb the ranks(being the ‘child’ of Optimus helps a lot). The human uses a Cybertronian persona. Later they go out to the Cybertronian battlefields. This is where they meet Deadlock, Megatron’s maddog, the one responsible for so many deaths to the human’s friends. The Human quickly becomes Deadlocks rival, able to counter all his attacks and save Autobots from his clutches. After a while Deadlock develops a strange liking to the 'mech’, he seems to almost enjoy seeing them on the battlefield. One fateful day the Human and Deadlock run into each other on the battlefield, it’s just the two of them. Deadlock has trained a lot more after the first few encounters with the 'mech’ and the 'mech’ sadly couldn’t keep up, however, it didn’t stop them from doing a number on Deadlock. Deadlock is smart, he makes sure to damage the mech’s legs to most so they can’t run anywhere. The one thing that he enjoys about fighting the 'mech’ is that they don’t seem to feel pain. The mech can no longer stand up or move, it’s stuck. Deadlock oddly enough doesn’t kill them.

“You would make a great Decepticon”. … W-What? Was that an offer? Oh hell no! The Human would never join this monster after all he’s done to their friends! The Human gets out of their mech, much to Deadlocks surprise. What a lovely twist! The Human uses their blaster to keep damaging Deadlock, ducking for cover. Even out of their mech they were a threat to any Cybertronian, however, they weren’t as fast as one. Deadlock didn’t use his weapons, that would make it too easy, instead, he scoops the Human up ignoring the humans screams. He takes away their weapons and destroys their commlink. “Well well well. Who would have known? This explains a lot…” Deadlock forces the human to look up at him. His little obsession, his rival, was an organic… and a pretty cute one too!(Though he’ll never admit it) The Human struggles in his grip. “Now now. I don’t think you should do that” His grip tightens around the Human. 'It would be a shame if your armor were t’ break…’ the human stiffens, without the armor they would suffocate. “Heh.. I think I’m gonna keep you for a long while friend…” Deadlock keeps his rival on him at all times at the Decepticon base. No one is allowed to touch them but him. Most Decepticons see the Human as a living trophy to Deadlock, a pet, not knowing of Deadlock’s obsessive desires. Megatron is quite surprised by Deadlock's new pet. Megatron knew the mech that the human-piloted was Optimus’ favorite bot, not only would the Human be a good bargaining chip, but they probably know all the Autobots' little secrets. Megatron will let Deadlock do whatever he wants to do with the Human for now, after all, he earned it. Deadlock was happy with this. Meanwhile back at the Autobot base, Optimus is filled with grief. His precious human, his child, gone without a trace. He didn’t know if they were dead or not, Optimus sends out search parties for them, he regrets letting them in this war, they were too young. Ratchet is constantly checking for signals in his free time, for any sign that they were alive. Bumblebee goes quiet for a long time. He knows his sibling HAS to be alive! They have to be! They don’t die easily. He tries scout on more missions so he can find them. Arcee is filled with rage. That was her precious little sibling. Her anger is taken out on the battlefield. She questions any con she can for a sign of the human. She’s always training always, looking, always holding back her grief and the ideas that her sibling could be dead or tortured. No one has ever seen her like this. The human's disappearance is hard on everyone. That kid would constantly befriend and check up with everyone they saw, they were kind, helpful, and eager to learn. It’s dull without them at the base. They’re not there to tell Prowl to stop overworking himself. They aren’t there to help Wheeljack or Percy with their experiments. They aren’t there to jam out with Jazz or Blaster or to talk to and check up with everyone in the base. No one to listen to Ironhide's or Kup's stories. No one to complement Sunstreaker and play with Sideswipe. Everyone is heartbroken. This base isn’t a base without the kid running around. They can only hope that the human is still alive. The Decepticon base is another story. The human is filled with information about the Autobots, with the human on their side the war is in the bag. They have coordinates and information on practically every bot in the base and maybe… with a bit of mnemosurgey they could be an excellent Decepticon. The human is fine. They’re patient. They’re smart, they know how to play their cards, (Perceptor and Wheeljack taught them) they just have to play along with Deadlock and the cons for now. Hopefully, the Human can escape or pray that Optimus will find them. And hopefully, Deadlock has mercy on them.

***** ****** *****

My adding to the story:

The room was filtered, much like the human’s armored spacesuit had been. The entire Decepticon base was, not that the human had spent much time outside their room. When they did leave the room, it was for “questioning.” And it was always accompanied by Deadlock. Usually being carried by Deadlock. Actually, always carried by Deadlock. He said it was because he didn't want his human to get lost or crushed under the peds of a careless con. Really, it was to feel their rival squirm in his tight grip. Megatron had been present for a few of the first interrogations, but other duties or battles made his presence less and less frequent, which was fine by the human. As far as they were concerned, there were more than enough Decepticons around as it was. Using techniques Wheeljack had taught them, they “gave up” the info the cons wanted, just not all of it. It was just enough to keep the Decepticons from getting suspicious, get them to believe that the information that they pulled from Deadlock’s new pet was indeed genuine, but not enough info, they hoped, to really cause too much damage to the Autobots. The human needed to find a way out of this nightmare before the Decepticons caught on to what they were doing. Or before they gave up info that could actually do damage to the Autobots. It was getting harder and harder to keep the vital info they held away from their more sadistic interrogators.

The human loses track of time since being captured. Deadlock had taken their armored space suit soon after bringing them here. “No need for it here, little friend.” His sinister smile always made the human uneasy, but he just laughed at their rival’s defiant expression, putting the suit away in his subspace and leaving for another mission, making sure to lock the door behind him. When the human had time alone in the room, they scoured every inch for some means of escape. The vents looked promising, but getting to them would be difficult, even if they scaled the height of the berth or the desk, they were too short to reach. They need a better plan.

Meanwhile, the searches Optimus organized finally turned up something. If it's a good something or not has yet to be decided. It was Bumblebee who found it- the mech suit the human had been piloting when they went missing. He brought it back to base and everyone nearly lost their minds! The human, their human, without their protective mech suit?! Their armor they wore underneath was not found though, did that mean they had it and were still alive? The mech was severely damaged, they must have tried to run on foot and been captured. But by whom? And were they still alive now? Hopefully Perceptor would be able to find out something from the damaged mech to get some clue to the human’s location.

For the human, however, thoughts of being rescued seemed to be little more than a hopeful wish. Deadlock did his best to make sure that any such wish seemed less and less likely. “They’ll never find you,” he tells them. “They've given up looking for you long ago.” Or “Even if they did find out you were still alive, what makes you think they'll want you after what you've done? It was your information that lead us to victory in the Cronus Plains. How many of them did we kill because of you?” Deadlock took great pleasure in seeing his rival’s reaction to this. He smiled, knowing he could break his once-mortal-enemy both mentally as well as physically. Lifting their chin with one sharp finger he cooed, “I told you before, you'd make a good Decepticon. It seems I was right.” He moves closer, a dangerous, hungry gleam flashed in his optics. As Deadlock took a step forward, the human took two steps back. Deadlock chuckled and used mass-displacement to shrink down to just taller than the human. The human dodges his reach and turns and runs towards the berth to hide. Such a tactic seemed childish, and was doomed to fail, but it was better than doing nothing, it was some show of resistance. Deadlock was a lot… “touchier”... when he was this size, simply because it was easier to be so when the risk of crushing the object of his obsession was so much lessened. He grabbed the human by the shoulders and pulled them closer to him. “You're tense,” he murmurs, running one servo down their back. “Let me put you more at ease, my pet.” While still holding them so they couldn't get away, Deadlock stroked and prodded, massaging knots in their back and expertly melted the struggling human in his grasp. The human felt both frustrated by how effectively they'd been incapacitated, and blissfully relaxed as the tension they'd been carrying fell away. With what mental capacities they had left, the human willed themselves to make sure they made no moans or hums that would betray their pleasure to the Decepticon. After few minutes, Deadlock’s servos paused. He turned the human around to face him, holding them close and tight to his chassis. “There now, better?” One servo traveled down the small of the human’s back. The human didn't respond. Oh they wished they could be anywhere but here! They thought of the Autobot base, of their friends, of the bots that had become their family. Could what Deadlock said earlier be true? Had they given up looking for them? Did they blame them for giving up information? They must. The human sure did. As much as they tried to stop it from happening, the human let out a sob. Just the one, but it was one too many.

“There, there, none of that now,” rumbled Deadlock, “What's there to cry about? I've kept you alive. I've taken care of you. I will make sure no one dares harm you. You're one of us now.” He paused, his red optics glowing brighter. “You're mine.” He leaned forward, crushing his lips into the human’s. So taken by surprise, the human tried yelling out, which only made Deadlock squeeze them tighter in his arms, his glossa filling their opened mouth. The human struggled against his grip, but it was quickly obvious that they weren't going anywhere. As Deadlock’s servos traveled across their body, an idea of a plan came into their mind. It was a dangerous idea. It was an incredibly stupid idea, but maybe it was stupid enough to work. Instead of fighting against him, the human pushed into the kiss. Slowly, carefully, they loosed one arm and reached around to Deadlock’s neck, stroking the sensitive cables. He shivered delightedly as his cooling fans kicked on. After another moment, the human slid their other hand slowly up his chassis to where they'd seen their space suit stored away before. Lights all across Deadlock's body flickered. He reached one arm out to the berth to try to lift them both up onto it.

It was quick, before Deadlock could process what happened, the human pulled themselves away from him, opened his subspace compartment, yanked their suit out, and with one steady movement they had learned from Arcee, wrenched his arm behind his back and pinned him face down into the ground. Hard into the ground. They hoped that would be enough to keep their captor stunned long enough to get a good head start. They jumped up and ran to the door. If they could make it to the hallway and find a hiding spot, they could get their suit on and sneak out of the Decepticon base. They'd be free! The door was not locked, but it was closed and very heavy. They had only managed to crack it open when Deadlock began picking himself up off of the floor. Well, there went their head start. The human gave the door one last shove with their shoulder and started squeezing through. They were just about out when the door completely opened, sending them tumbling to the floor. Deadlock, now returned to his full size, reached down, scooped them up, and tossed them back into the room, sending them rolling across the floor. The door shut again with a loud metallic thud, followed by a click indicating that it was now locked. “I must admit, you're very good.” Deadlock's voice was dangerously calm, he almost seemed amused. “I've always known you were, the first time I saw you on the battlefield, I found you to be exceptional. A challenge for me after so many boring victories. Where was that again- our first? It's been a while, hasn't it?” He picked up the human again, who groaned at the movement of their bruised body. “Was… it was just outside... Simfur,” the human gasped, still trying to catch their breath after having it knocked out of them by the throw. “I must say... your hand-to-hand combat... hasn't improved much since then. I don't even need my mech suit to take you.” Now was certainly not the best time to sass-mouth a psychopathic killer robot, but the human was beyond caring. Deadlock only chuckled and held them close, pinning them to him so they couldn't move. “That may be. I've found I've always done well enough with my weapons though.” He began stroking the human's back absent-mindedly as he sat down on the berth. “Perhaps with a bit of mnemosurgery, you'd be more willing to stick around and give me some pointers.” The human's voice was a bit muddled y Deadlock's hold, but they said something along the lines of “like hell I will.” Deadlock mused to himself about future days with his then-compliant human, smiling at all the implications that shadowplay could bring. “It will be interesting to see how well mnemosurgery works on an organic, but I'm sure it will do wonders.” With the adrenaline of their failed escape attempt fading, and warm living metal surrounding them, the human felt exhaustion creeping in. Before they completely slipped away, they thought of Optimus and for a moment, they were back at the base, surrounded by the Autobots. Would they ever train with Bumblebee and Arcee again? Would they ever help Sunstreaker feed Bob again? Ever listen to another story from Ironhide, only to be interrupted by Kupp who told them ’how it really happened?’ They hoped so. They hoped the Autobots still wanted them back. “I’m sorry” they muttered as sleep finally overtook them.

*****    *****    *****    *****    *****    *****

Deadlock had been watching intently from the moment the mnemosurgeon entered the room. He was tense and anxious about what was going to happen, but inwardly giddy at the prospects a successful outcome could bring. Thinking back, it had been rather easy to convince Lord Megatron about going through with the procedure. Granted, Deadlock had kept all reasoning points to how it could help scrape out any remaining info the human had been resiliently holding back, further the Decepticon cause, and provide a severe blow to Optimus and his Autobots when they found out what had happened to their small, spunky, cute, soft… Deadlock shook his head ever so slightly. His mind was wandering again. It did that fairly often when he thought of his little rival. He watched as the mnemosurgeon inserted his needles to the base of their head. It was only two needles, and they couldn't be fully extended. As had been explained to him, mnemosurgeon was possible on organic life, but the process was different, and the results, varied. Instead of direct manipulation of memories as without on a cybertronian, organic life had to be done indirectly, usually through the twists and turns of emotions. Brains and processors, while shockingly similar, had their own operating systems, so to speak. The translation of mnemosurgery to an organic brain was difficult. It had been difficult to find someone capable of doing such a feat. Harder still, one willing to do it for him. Just in case the difficult and dangerous operation went awry, few wanted to run the risk of telling Deadlock they'd turned his little pet into a braindead bag of flesh. But he'd found one. A small lanky bot who went by the name Trepan. He seemed confident in his abilities and didn't even bat an optic when Deadlock added a bit more to his task. He was to not only seek out info, as he had told Megatron the purpose of this was, but he also wanted a few alterations. Nothing big, just a nudge, really. His little human, his little rival was still fighting him. They just needed a little mental persuasion to be sure that in the end, Deadlock won their little game.

It felt… weird. Were you floating? Were you sitting? Did it even matter? If this was weird, then what was normal? You couldn't think of the answer. Should that trouble you? You weren't sure. There was a voice that seemed to say it was fine. Well, it wasn't a voice so much as an idea. Basically, it said everything was alright, or more, the "voice" felt like everything was alright. Everything was according to plan. What plan? Was there a plan? Had you forgotten to do something for it? No, the voice that wasn't a voice came again, everything was fine, perfectly fine, just be calm. Oh, calm. That sounded nice. You hadn't really been calm for a long time. Not since before the battle with Deadlock, back when you were with the Autobots and, and… wait, what was the beginning of that thought? Calm. Oh yes, calm. You'd been calm for so long, you were the master at calm. How long had you been calm? Always. Oh, ok. That sounds nice, being calm is nice. Something seemed to nag in the back of your mind, something you were worried about, or should be worried about. What was it again? Is it about Deadlock?- the voice seemed to question sweetly. Uhhh, yes. Yes, it probably was. Why worry about him? He was perfectly fine. He can handle himself. No, not worried like that, it was more like… like… Why worry about him at all? Because, you thought. Because of what he's done. The battle- he took- The training- the voice corrected almost as instantaneously as you thought each word. He saved- The training where we fought. He saved me and took me back to base. I've been trying to get away. I have to get back, everyone's probably so worried. Oh, how did this line of thought start? Go back. Deadlock. He saved me during training and I've been trying to do something ever since. Do what? What was I doing? Uhhh… escape?- Leave, the word was replaced almost seamlessly again. Why leave? Deadlock would be so worried about you. You wouldn't want that. Oh, no, I guess not, right? Was that why I was worried about Deadlock earlier? Yeah, probably. He will be so worried when I'm gone. Then why go? He wants to take care of you, you need to be taken care of. Oh, yes. That was a good point. Cybertron wasn't exactly kind on humans. You needed help for sure. And if that help came from Deadlock, well then- But something still nagged in the back of your mind. Something? A couple of things? What were they? Did it matter? Did the somethings matter? What did matter? Deadlock. That's what mattered. And you mattered to him. In fact, you mattered so much to him that he was taking care of you. Oh, that's nice of him. Yes, very nice. You have nothing to be worried about with him around. It's easy to be calm around him. Yeah, it is. Very easy. Especially when he holds me...

*****    *****    *****    *****    *****    *****

Red Alert had checked the readouts. Had double checked them. Triple checked them. He had to be sure before he told anyone else. There'd been a pattern with the past few battles with the Decepticons. A mis-step on their part here, late arrivals and backups, tactical errors that seemed out of place of their usual methods. Yes, the Decepticons had won several important victories lately, but there was something off. It was like someone was feeding them misinformation and half-truths. The timing was too much to be a coincidence. Good thing that Red Alert didn’t believe in coincidences. The human, their human- was alive. And they were being held captive and questioned by the Decepticons. It took a bit of investigating. Red Alert felt confident enough to bring his discovery to Prime. He had to be sure. At the same time, he knew he had to make sure he had to hurry. Who knew how much longer the human would last with the Deceptions! By the time Optimus returned to base later that day, Red Alert and more than half the team were there waiting. "What's all this? What's going on?" Red Alert without a moment of hesitation handed Prime the datapad. “Sir, we have reason to believe that we know where (name) is being kept.” *** The human woke up wrapped in Deadlock’s arms. He was still in recharge from the even sounds of his air intake. They looked drearily up at his face. It was rare to see him look so calm. As they slowly became fully awake, they pulled as much of the soft blankets they could reach more tightly around them. They couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong. They frowned. What a way to wake up! But what? Was it because of Deadlock’s latest mission assignments? He often had to leave to fight or to do tasks given to him by Megatron. They were usually very dangerous and the human would hold his arm tightly in worry when he would return and recount his day to them. Were they worried about Deadlock getting hurt, or worse yet, not coming back at all? Well, yes, of course. Especially with this latest mission. But was that really the reason behind this guttural feeling of dread. They were anxious, like they had to act and act now before it was too late! What were they supposed to do?! They tried getting up without disturbing Deadlock. Something was wrong, but what could it possibly be? The human's breathing started to become frantic. It felt stuffy in the room. They wished they could go outside. Or well, maybe not outside on Cybertron, that would be deadly without their suit. It felt like every cell of their body was craving the feel of unfiltered sunshine. Their lungs yearned for even a whiff of fresh air. Walking on soft grass? Yes please. Digging through rich, organic-filled soil? It was like part of their soul hungered desperately for it. They tried to remember the last time they’d felt any of that back on Earth. They had taken it for granted then, not realizing how much they’d miss it when they went to Cybertron to join the Autobots. They’d been too full of righteous anger then, wanting vengeance for their losses, hoping to help end the war sooner in any way they could. They didn’t realize how much they’d miss… Their heart froze in their chest. Autobots? When they’d left Earth, they’d gone to join the... Autobots? That couldn’t be right? That didn’t make sense! The more they thought about it, the more their memories started to make less and less sense. The Autobots were their enemy. Right? But then why were there memories of Optimus Prime giving them a tour of the Autobot base? Why had they gone on a joyride with Sideswipe? Hound had shown them some Cybertronian vegetation samples he had been preserving throughout the war. Arcee and Chromia had helped them translate their fighting moves to combat while in a battle suit. They nearly gasped in shock as feelings of guilt and grief flooded their brain. Why were they feeling this? Why did they miss them? Where were these memories coming from? Recoiling, they searched their mind. Deadlock had met them on Earth, had saved them from an Autobot attack? They frowned. That memory felt so colorless and hollow compared to the new ones they’d discovered, but they continued. They’d begged Deadlock to let them come with him to Cybertron. He’d trained them to fight. Shockwave built the battle suit which was destroyed. It was a close call, but they’d survived. Deadlock hadn’t let them leave the Decepticon Base since, too worried about their safety. That… that was there. In their mind. Images of memories were there, acting as evidence of their validity. But… the more they were examined, the more things started falling apart. Cracks started forming in the memories, like dried paint on a balloon when you inflate it, or puzzle pieces that don’t quite fit together. And like a mis-matched puzzle, the whole image was starting to make less and less sense the more they thought about it. Something was wrong. Something was terribly, terribly wrong. Despite the human’s efforts to remain still and calm, Deadlock started stirring. His optics came back online and their red light spilled down onto the smaller human. “You’re awake early today,” he commented in a deep, still somewhat sleepy voice. “How did you sleep?” "Fine," they muttered stiffly. Deadlock pulled them in tightly, his lips resting against the shell of their ear. "Mmmmmmhmmmmm. Something is troubling you," he paused as if waiting for a response. When none came, he turned the human around to face them. "What’s wrong? Tell me.” He paused again, but there was only silence. “How can I fix what’s troubling you if you don't tell me?” The human frowned, conflicted about what to say, or if they should say anything at all. They gave in as Deadlock’s grip began getting unbearably tight. “How long have I been here?” The grip became significantly more loose as Deadlock’s expression changed to a mix of surprise and confusion. “What was that?” “How… how long have I been here,” they ask again, their confidence waxing a bit stronger as they seemed to find their voice. “What have I done?” The human could feel Deadlock tense at the question for just an instant before he relaxed again and responded in a dangerously sweet tone, "What kind of question is that? Where is all this coming from?" The human had enough sense to know that telling the truth about these new and confusing memories would only make trouble. If they were false, then it would only upset Deadlock unnecessarily. If they were true... well, they weren’t sure what that would mean just yet, but it definitely wasn’t good. In the meantime, they had to think of something to say. Deadlock’s red eyes were burning into their own. Thinking on the spot, they came up with what they could and told a half-truth. “I had… a strange dream. I don’t know if it was a nightmare or not, it just… it was… strange.” “Strange? How so?” The human panicked a bit, but kept their cool. That’s what Wheeljack had taught them before right? Wait, right? Uh, well that was kind of the question and problem right now. They had to come up with something to say and quick, so they continued on with the half-truths. “I think I just miss Earth. I was dreaming about it, and then I was here with you on Cybertron, but I was also with the Autobots? But we weren’t fighting. And then Megatron was there and he was really happy about something and…” The human looked up at Deadlock with the most innocent puppy dog eyes they could muster, “I’m sorry, I know that all sounds silly. Dreams don’t always make sense though, especially when you try to explain them out lou-” Deadlock swore violently as he got up from the berth and returned to his full size. The human sat, dazed and confused as Deadlock stomped toward the door. Before he reached it, he turned back to the human. “You’re sure you were dreaming about the Autobots?” His voice was icy and sent shivers down the human’s spine. They silently nodded, still a bit in shock. With a low growl, Deadlock turned back to the door and stomped out, leaving the human locked and alone in the room. “Well,” they said aloud to themselves, “that was odd.” Odd, and terrifying. It didn’t seem to match their memories of Deadlock, or… no. No it did. Dual images of Deadlock existed. A soft, caring bot who loved them and let them stay with him while on Cybertron was mirrored by a vicious and cruel mech who had fought and captured them and now kept them here as a trophy and play-thing. But which one was real? Why were there conflicting memories in their head? The human pulled their legs in close to the rest of their body and took a deep breath in an attempt to clear their mind. They had to figure this out. They had to get to the bottom of this. What was the truth? ---- Deadlock stomped down the hall, sending lower-ranking cons scurrying out of his way as he passed. They knew better than to be in range of the mech when fury roiled in his EM field like that, it was not a safe place to be at all. He paid them no mind though. There was only one bot that needed to watch out for his wrath right now. They weren’t on base now, but as soon as Deadlock got his claws into Trepan, he was going to pay dearly. Then he was going to address and fix the spots he missed in his dear little rival’s memories, before this all got out of servo.

*****    *****    *****    *****    *****    *****

The human had been sitting in silence for, well, they weren’t sure how long. In the hours of his absence, they used Deadlock’s absence to review their memories in peace. They paced until their legs were tired. They sat to think before they grew too restless and began pacing again. How could they remember being with the Autobots and leaving Earth with Deadlock at the same time? That was impossible. Something was wrong. What was real? What was fake? Why were there fake memories in their head? Their feelings up to this point, about the Decepticons, about… about Deadlock… were those even real? Their chest felt tight as they began hyperventilating. What had happened -really happened? Why were they like this?!? They were trying to fight back tears as they searched through confusing memories when the door opened. The human glanced up apprehensively. Deadlock? They weren’t sure they were ready to face him right now. Not like this. For better or for worse, it wasn’t Deadlock. It was… it was Frenzy. The Casseticon’s silhouette was harshly lit from behind. The human stared silently, frozen in place as Frenzy stepped to the berth and pulled them up and along behind him roughly. “Looks like Deadlock’s gone off on one of his little jaunts. Humph. Just ‘cuz he’s Megatron’s favorite, he can do whatever he wants, go wherever he wants,” he looked back at the human, “take whatever he wants.” “What are you doing?” The human’s voice was barely more than a whisper. “More than what I signed up for today, that’s what,” was the gruff reply they got. Frenzy was a little more than a foot taller than they were and it was easy for him to drag the human along out the door. The relative safety of the room now gone, the human’s heart rate spiked even further. They’d left the room before. Plenty of times. But almost always with Deadlock. And definitely always not in the middle of some mental breakdown or memory mishap, or whatever the heck was going on with them! Primal fear stabbed through their stomach while at the same time, flaking memories surfaced in her mind of Deadlock telling them they’d always be safe with the Decepticons. Frenzy seemed oblivious to the mental war raging in the organic creature in his servo. He was much too focused grumbling about Deadlock’s sudden disappearance and having to cover his extra duties. “Now I get to haul you to Shockwave’s lab on top of everything else. If I were to just not show up for something, I’d never hear the end of it! Or rather, I would, right after I was put offline. But no, Deadlock can do whatever he wants whenever he wants because he’s Megatron’s little-” A loud alarm cut the disgruntled Decepticon off. He paused and looked around and tensed, then growled as he received orders over his comm. “Yeah I got the fleshie now… but I… but boss!.... Yeah, yeah, I got it. I’m going.” “Wh-what’s going on?” “Nonaya business, we’re just gonna have ta make a detour is all,” Frenzy started quickly down a corridor, nearly pulling the human’s arm out of their socket, grumbling as they struggled to keep pace. It was all they could do to avoid being dragged along behind the casseticon. Their mind raced as they tried to figure out what the heck was going on! Frenzy swore as the pair came around the corner. Two Autobots nearly ran into them, but one of them was able to jump out of the way to avoid a collision. The second smaller bot wasn’t quite as quick on his peds. The human nearly had the air knocked out of them as they crashed into the bright yellow of his chassis. “(Name)?!” The human looked up. Bumblebee? And the other… Sunstreaker? Almost immediately, a swirl of double memories assaulted their mind, laughing with Bumblebee while pulling a prank at base, helping Sunstreaker buff out some scratches after a battle with the Decepticons, dodging a blast from Bumblebee on the battlefield, hiding under debris while they prepared for a counterattack… wait, no, that hadn’t been Bumblebee, it was… it was Deadlock? Wait, what? Their stomach turned. With a screech of metal, Frenzy grabbed the slightly larger Bumblebee by the arm and swung him into Sunstreaker. Before either could recover, the casseticon ran and reached out for the human again. Just before he could grab them, a small, multi-limbed something jumped and struck him sideways. “Good boy Bob!” Sunstreaker cheered as he scooped up the small insecticon. Before the human could register what was going on, they were swept off their feet by Bumblebee who led Sunstreaker and Bob back down the corridor they came from. “No! Let me go!” the human screamed. They weren’t sure what was going on anymore and all they wanted was just a few moments to try to process what was going on and what was wrong with them. “(Name)?�� Bumblebee's voice sounded shocked and worried. “(Name), it’s me, it’s, it’s us. We’re your friends, we’re here to rescue you.” he glanced back to Sunstreaker who in turn looked back briefly at where they had left Frenzy behind. For a moment, it looked like he might go back and take a few extra shots at the small Decepticon. “What have those fraggin’ cons done to them?” With a kick and a struggle, the human squirmed out of Bumblebee’s grip and bolted. They didn’t know where. All they knew was they had to find somewhere, anywhere to think. “(Name)! Come back! Please!” The human stumbled a bit. Please? Since when did Autobots say please? Or, wait, no. No. Autobots… when did Decepticons say please? When had Deadlock ever said… From behind, the human saw Bumblebee, no Deadlock, no Bumblebee reaching out to them again. Past images flashed of Bumblebee reaching out to grab them, taking them away from the battlefield, no, away from their home on Earth? What was true anymore?! They grabbed their head as if that would help clear things. Not clearly watching where they were going, they tripped and rolled to a stop. “What did you do, drop them?” Sunstreaker ran up to help. With a loud clang, he was knocked back by a newcomer behind the human. “Autobot scum,” a familiar voice growled. The human’s spine tingled. Was that fear? But why? The human turned their head to see Deadlock look down and lock his glowing red eyes on them. “(Name), what are you doing out here?” he nearly snarled. He reached down toward them. As he reached, time seemed to slow down as the action sparked a surge of memories. On the battlefield, escaping a broken mech suit and running, doing their best to fight back while attempting to retreat, getting grabbed by Deadlock, the feeling of helplessness as they were carried off. The human’s eyes widened. These memories felt different than the others. This one felt whole and clear- like the others were glitching and foggy by comparison. They may not be sure what the heck was going on, but they knew one thing: Deadlock would not catch them again. They rolled and were on their feet with the speed that only comes from training. More clear memories surfaced: training with Arcee on evasive maneuvers, the Autobot base, the battlefield the day they’d been captured as they’d attempted to dodge Deadlock’s grasp. A wave of resolve filled the human. These memories were true. They clung to them desperately as they dove away from Deadlock’s reach. No sooner had they cleared the Decepticon’s outstretched hand that Bumblebee tackled him. The two tumbled back and Bumblebee kept his hits coming, trying to prevent Deadlock from being able to draw his weapons. The human nearly lept as Sunstreaker approached, crouching down to their level. The only thing that kept them from running was the fact that they were fighting against Deadlock. That was enough to hesitantly side with them for the moment. “(Name), it’s okay, we’re going to get you out of here.” Sunstreaker glanced up at his fellow yellow Autobot, now struggling to keep Deadlock occupied. He activated his comm. “Prime, we found them! We’ve got company though. Requesting backup.” Before he could end the transmission, Deadlock had managed to throw Bumblebee off of him. The minibot hit and rolled, leaving scrapes of paint and scratches in the floor behind him. As Deadlock reached to pull his guns, Sunstreaker blasted him in the shoulder. The con toppled back, crashing against the wall and dropping one of his blasters. Sunstreaker jumped up, pulling his arm for a punch. Before it could connect however, Deadlock’s hands shot out and stopped the oncoming attack. Sunstreaker cried out as Deadlock squeezed the Autobot’s fist in his larger hand and rose to his feet slowly. Sunstreaker threw a punch with his other hand, which connected with Deadlock’s face and caused him to stumble. With a terrifying growl, the larger con pulled Sunstreaker back with him, caught their fall with a sweep of his legs, and jolted forward to crash his helm into Sunstreaker’s face. Before the injured Autobot could hit the ground, the human had scampered to Deadlock’s fallen weapon. The gun was nearly as large as they were, but they were able to heft it up enough to get their arms around it. They put a hand on the trigger, and putting their whole weight into it, were able to lean it back enough to aim it at Deadlock. The smug smile melted off the Decepticon’s face as he noticed his rival’s actions. “(Name), put it down, you’re confused and afraid, it’s okay, I’m here for you now. You’re safe.” “Am I?” The human shouted back. Their voice sounded so raspy and not nearly as steady as they had hoped. “Then why do I have these memories? You attacked Earth! You attacked the Autobots! You attacked me! I remember fighting you in a mech suit.” Deadlock growled and his ruby optics flashed to the Autobots who were only just starting to stir on the ground. “They messed with your mind. Put that weapon down and I can get you help. We can fix this and you can be happy again.” The human readjusted their slipping grip on the weapon. “No! This started before they came. You did this, I don’t know how, but now I have double memories that tell two completely different stories. But you,” the human took a deep breath to steady themselves. They were shaking now. It was a struggle to keep the gun up and pointed at the menacing con in front of them. “You, I remember you. I have memories of fighting you that are clearer than the rest. I remember you destroying my mech suit and capturing me. You brought me here against my will. I don’t know what you did to me, but I’m leaving with the Autobots!” Deadlock’s optics narrowed. “What makes you think they want you back? How can you be sure they’re not just here to terminate you? Think of what you’ve done, what information you’ve spilled? How much Autobot energon do you think we’ve spilled because of you?” Deadlock smiled as the human’s eyes widened. Their hold on his weapon began to slip once more. He lowered his voice, “I told you, you are a Decepticon now. Like it or not, you belong here, with me.” The human’s eyes watered, and they blinked hard, trying to remove the extra fluids. Deadlock smirked. He had them. He would always have them. They could fight, and as amusing as their intrepid spirit was, he would always best his precious little rival. Thundering footsteps from down the corridor interrupted Deadlock’s triumphal thoughts. A large, red, and blue shape ran into view. “(Name!)” Optimus yelled, taking stock of the scene he was coming into. The human stared at him. Once again, memories flashed: meeting the Autobot leader on Earth, asking, begging him to allow them to join the fight, seeing the worried but proud look in those blue optics when they first powered up their new mech suit. Like before, these memories seemed sharp and clear. They brought a surge of emotions and comfort to the human’s entire body. Optimus was here and they’d be okay now. Deadlock snarled and reached for his other gun still holstered over his shoulder. Before he could draw and shoot, the human took advantage of his distraction and pulled the trigger. Their aim, as it were while trying to hold the too-large-for-them weapon, was not great, but it did hit. Deadlock stumbled and clutched his leg where he’d been shot. He turned back to the human, optics as angry as fire. With the remaining strength they had left, the human pulled the trigger again. The shot went awry this time, but Deadlock flinched at it nonetheless. As he pulled back his arm to swipe at the human, Optimus plowed into him, sending him tumbling into the wall. Having spent the last bit of their strength, the human fell to the ground, Deadlock’s gun pinning them awkwardly, but only for a moment. Optimus, as carefully as he could, removed the weapon and scooped the exhausted human in his arms. Behind him, Ironhide, Arcee, and Jazz ran up, weapons drawn and ready. Ironhide kept his cannons pointed at the unmoving Deadlock while Arcee and Jazz went to help Sunstreaker and Bumblebee who were struggling to rise now. “Up ya get my man,” Jazz helped Sunstreaker to his feet and pulled his arm over his shoulder to give support, “you’re brother’s never gonna let me hear the end of it if I don’t getcha back to base in one piece. You too Bob.” The insecticon who had been trapped under the fallen Sunstreaker, chirped and whirred weakly. Bumblebee, who was now being supported by Arcee, looked around and asked weakly, “(Name)? Are, are they alright?” Optimus looked down at the human cradled carefully in his arms. They gave a weak smile through their tears. It was about all they could manage right now as they were struggling to keep themselves from just shutting down mentally. The double memories had taken a toll on their mind. They still just wanted time to think, to figure all this out. There were wounds from this that would need to be healed. For now, though, they knew they could trust Optimus. They could feel that deep down, more than any memory, false or true, could say otherwise. Optimus nodded to his bots and opened his commlink, “Autobots, fall back. Ratchet, prepare to open a ground bridge at the rendezvous point.” The Autobots retreat, joy in their sparks. Arcee and Bumblebee look on with smiles as they retrace their steps down the corridors of the Decepticon base. They had their human “sibling” back! Ironhide led the way, canons at the ready as they went. Jazz soon joined him after Sunstreaker insisted that he could walk fine by himself and would cover the rear. No Decepticons snuck up on their back, and between Jazz and Ironhide, the cons they came across were quickly dispatched. They made it back to the rendezvous point with the other Autobots. The human at this point was barely hanging on to consciousness and didn’t hear Optimus comm Ratchet to open the ground bridge, but they did see the familiar blue and green swirling lights. As the Autobots retreated through the bridge, they looked up at Optimus. He noticed their attention and looked down concernedly at them. There were still tears in their eyes, though they were from relief now more than anything. “You came for me.” Something about the tone they said it in, tore at Optimus’ spark. Their shock and pitiful hopefulness spoke volumes about what psychological treatment they’d been dealt while captive. It was going to be a lot of time and effort to heal. Optimus looked around at his Autobots around him. They kept shooting worried looks to the human in his arms. He knew each and every one of them loved the human greatly, each in their own way, and would be supportive as they healed. The human, whom he viewed as his own child, was in good hands now. “Of course, (Name), we’re your family. We’ll always be here for you.” The human looked like they might break into tears but instead smiled softly before they finally slipped peacefully into a much-needed sleep.

[black-strike-otp]

part 2

time to shitpost becuz it’s hard to sleep with loud assholes about lmao

Of course, the heroin of this story cannot die because what fun would that be and how would otp be a thing (unless- ghost au. But let's not)? So a wee little gullible Novastrike managed to survive being in Decepticon territory. She’s very cautious and takes a slow, tedious trek with little risk as possible as she tries heading back to familiar Autobot territory. It takes weeks, but it’s worth it in the end when she manages to rejoin a fellow group of Autobots.

Quickly identified, Novastrike is immediately court-martialed by an Autobot officer. She is found guilty of some of the accusations against her; and is offered minor penalties more or less. Apparently news had reached Optimus Prime himself and although not thrilled with an escaped Decepticon commanding officer, he realizes that from reports, the ideals of Autobots were indeed not being followed by her team and gave the femme some slack.

With a ‘slap on the wrist’ punishment more or less, Nova is eventually allowed to be placed back in service. She is moved to a less-popular location for work and given the duty clean up crew, ie, doing the lackey chores around base, cleaning up after others, aiding in the disposal of bodies (”who was this, sir?” “Don’t ask questions, femme, just do your job.” “.... Yes sir.”).

Nova sees no battle, does nothing of particular value, and spends her spare time training despite the occasional mocking comment that there’s no way she’s ever going to see combat again. Undeterred; perhaps just stubborn or convinced she will see combat one way or another (of her choosing or not), she continues on training.

It pays off.

A Decepticon raid takes the Autobots off guard in the area. The entry of the base becomes overrun. Novastrike ends up joining those defending the area, and helps to hold the line until reinforcements.

She’s praised for her bravery, and it’s pointed out her combat skills are rough and sloppy, but she lived. Minor injures, but she was a good shot- but with a stun gun? Most say that was a ludicrous choice in weaponry, and Nova just shrugs it off and states there’s no weapons around for her size besides the training weapons.

Honest. There’s a small voice in the back of Novastrike’s head though. A flutter in the pit of her tanks. A jumping pulse momentarily in her spark.

The young femme has never killed before. The idea unnerves her, greatly.

With the pressure of the war mounting on even their unimportant locations doorstep, the commanding officer commissions new weapons be made. And he even takes into account Novastrike, under the high regard of some other Bots.

Slowly, the duties of others on base shift to allow everyone more training hours as well as give the responsibility of cleaning up the base. With more free time, Nova can train with more bots. It’s slow work, very slow, but she starts to progress in dealing with various size bots and smaller bots, and minicons, help advise her and encourage her the most.

A nearby base radios across Autobot channels one day they are under enemy fire and recover backup. The commanding Autobot of Nova’s base assembles a team. He’s hesitant to call up upon Novastrike but does so- trusting she will bring her recently assembled weapons.

What a foolish child, this little femme. She swallows her fear best she can, and at the last possible moment, switches out her new shiny guns for her training stun guns. Primus, she didn’t want to offline anyone.

It’s a massacre. Inbound, and they can see bodies litter the ground. Aboard the airship they’re dropped close to the ground and their air support takes off to aid from above. Novastrike can’t even take it all in. She’s never seen so many dead Cybertronian. Energon is everywhere, faces frozen even in death with horror and pain.

Her knees nearly buckle. This senseless violence, this carnage and death, and all for what? Couldn’t there be another way, was there no other alternative than to kill those who didn’t agree with you? The Council that had controlled Cybertron was scattered and most dead, could they not just work on a new government, could they not just work together?

There is yelling and blood and everyone is charging. Nova is caught up in the fray; stumbling over corpses with a shudder and soft apology. The deceased deserve better than to be trampled on in death.

“Primus bless your Sparks, I am sorry.”

Novastrike quickly tries to avoid confrontation as they charge head-on into the Decepticon forces. Spark pounding she follows the edges of battle towards the Autobot base, perhaps hoping to help others out there.

A femme blocks her way. She grins wildly; but she doesn’t see Nova. Her eyes are fixed on someone else in the throng of battle.

Spotting the Decepticon insignia on the femme’s shoulder, Novastrike stops. She raises her pistol shakily and fires, several times.

The stun rounds hit the femme and she shrieks wildly. She turns but it’s too late; too many stun rounds hit her and she stumbles awkwardly and falls.

Shuddering, Novastrike darts around the femme’s limp form and hurries along.

A weak plea for help catches her attention. Nova follows it, crawling over some deceased bodies to spot a Decepticon lying in a twisted heap of metal, his torso all but frayed in two.

An overwhelming sense of sympathy and an urgent need to do something sends Novastrike scrambling down to the mech’s side. He offers his servo, and she doesn’t even hesitate to grasp his digit gently.

“Please help... please help me.”

“What can I do?” Nova asks. She’s clueless. She’s no medic. She can’t help this mech. Her optics well with tears.

The mech continues to mutter weakly, his words turning to a slur. Novastrike grips his digit tightly. “I’m sorry,” she whispers while watching the mech slowly die. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

The light of his optics flicker and slowly fade. A gray hue begins to slowly creep over the mech’s frame as his mouth falls slack.

Novastrike places a servo against her mouth and bows her head. With a quiet prayer in her thoughts, she stands respectfully silent for the mech.

A shudder ripples through the ground. Novastrike looks up and hears the crack of an enormous weapon; energy rippling in the air.

An explosion nearly atop of her causes the front of the Autobot base to become a field of shrapnel and fire. Novastrike releases the mech’s digit and runs. It’s all she can hope to do as searing hot metal comes flying; searing and shooting straight through her limbs as she awkwardly dives over bodies.

The explosion forces Nova right in the midst of the fighting. Beads of energon dot her frame where twisted metal hit her, cut through her with ease. She’s shaking, sizzling circuits crackling, optics wide and side somewhat scorched.

Pedes are slamming all around her and Nova dodges wildly, not knowing who is who, where her allies are. She leaps away from the spray of weapon and splatter of others. A mech takes notice of her, and fires off an array of bullets. Nova dances back, trips, and manages to fall into the chassis of a dead bot of some kind.

With a squeal of fright she tries clammering out. The mech is momentarily distracted with firing at someone else, but spots her getting up and begins to shift his weapon towards her.

Unwilling to wait for another spray of fire, Nova half sags back into the cover of the torn up dead Cybertronian and raises her stun gun and fires it wildly at the mech.

He goes down.

With a breath of relief, Novastrike climbs out of the carcass’s holey body. She feels a stir in her, a small determination.

Before the feeling can leave her she charges into the fight.

There’s no good thing about war. But there is good. Novastrike proves relentless, not in killing, but in delaying. If knocking someone out, or down, saves a life, that is what she will do. And that is what she does.

She backflips out of the way of an energy-based shot and fires at the next mech. Rolls from a femme and shoots at her legs until she’s spasming and falling down. Paralyzing another Con’s arm so he retreats with a shocked and irritated expression.

Twisting and jumping out of the reach of a mech’s sword, Nova catches a tall shadow out of the corner of her optic. She shoots the mech attacking her but he still sluggishly advances.

She’s sidetracked though. Just a second, just a moment’s too long glance.

It’s that General. And he is pointedly looking at her. His gaze almost seems... amused?

Nova fumes. She considers the Fucking Giant, and is surprised as she’s knocked roughly aside by a weak swing by the mech’s sword as the flat side hits her.

Bouncing once, Nova skirts along the ground a moment and flops down. She sits up quickly to see the growling Decepticon advancing again.

She fires at him. He tries blocking her with his sword, and manages a few times, but not enough. Slowly, he falls to his knees, and collapses.

Venting a sigh, Novastrike flicks her optics to where she saw Satan at last. The mech was nearly out of range of her stun pistols already, but maybe-

She raises her gun, and fires.

Click. Click. Click.

“Frag,” Novastrike mutters. The damn things needed a recharge.

The small femme watches, witnessing mechs and femmes being cut down with ease by the Large Monster. He raises his cannon and fires. It’s massive; and cuts through a mech’s armor with fair ease.

Novastrike shudders. Was that what had caused the explosion at the entrance...?

Blackout turns slightly, blowing a hole clean through another Autobot who had tried to leap onto the big fragger when he was distracted.

Slipping her pistols away, Novastrike curls her tail close to her body. She looks around, and spots with some grateful cowardice some Autobots retreating off t oher far left.

Taking a final, swift glance back at the beastly mech tearing the entrails out of a femme who had managed to get close and attack the mech from the side, Novastike shuddered and took off after the other Autobots.

As she ran, she could hear a horrifying metallic noise from behind. She never dared turn back, but something, something came out from behind the retreating Autobots and whatever it was, the last thing she wanted to do was stop or slow down.

A few good Autobots were left behind by the cowards like Novastrike who continued to flee. Their screams echoing in the femme’s thoughts long past the time they had escaped and into the sleepless night-cycles to come.