#On the run exchange

[agentwhalesong]

Almost Everything She Ever Wished For

Also posted on AO3 | 3,306 words

Written for the On The Run, @xfilesfanficexchange, based on @kyouryokusenshi's prompt to explain how Scully became a doctor and how her name was cleared.

Enjoy ♥

She didn’t know how long she had been looking outside the kitchen window, watching life as it happened right in their backyard and thinking of her own. It was his presence right behind her more than his voice that woke her from her trance.

"Hey babe," he said, giving a quick kiss to the top of her head as he reached for the cupboard above her.

If he noticed anything off about her, he didn’t show.

"How was church?” he said, pouring himself some milk. “Did you say hi to Jesus for me?"

"I always do," she said, smiling.

“Aren’t you going to have breakfast?”

“I’ve already eaten, sorry for not waiting today.”

She leaned back on the sink while he sat, and uneasiness took over her as she wondered how she would broach the subject.

“Are you gonna tell me what’s wrong or will I have to guess?” He said, after a few moments of silence. “And if you say you’ve just seen Bigfoot outside that window, I’ll know you’re lying because he doesn’t come out of his cave this time of the year.”

This silly, silly man, she thought fondly as she laughed, but her smile slowly faded as she remembered she had a question to answer.

"Something happened today… Father Henderson approached me. It seems he has noticed me, despite my efforts."

"And what did he say?"

Mulder’s actual question was 'What did YOU say?', but she pretended not to have read between the lines.

"He said he's been curious about me. That he's seen me alone every time, and he was wondering if I wanted to do some volunteer work with the community, to kind of mingle and make friends. There's a local hospital in need of people to read to children and some other activities like that, so..."

What she didn't tell Mulder was that the father sensed loneliness in her, some sort of longing to be part of something, which was why he had approached her in the first place. What she didn't say was that Father Henderson was right in his evaluation. It wasn’t Mulder’s fault, of course; she had signed up for this when she decided to jump in that car with him without looking back. She would do it all over again without a second thought, but sometimes she wished she could also have a life outside their pretty, yet unremarkable, little house.

"What did you answer?" He interrupted her thoughts.

His face had changed slightly while she spoke, and she wouldn't have noticed it if she hadn't known him for over a decade; wouldn't have noticed if they hadn't been together day and night for the past couple of years.

"Don't worry, I wasn’t reckless. We are still wanted, no matter if it's been ages since we last sensed we were being followed."

He was quiet for a while, looked at the plate in front of him, bit his lower lip, and all of those small gestures made her look at her own feet, ashamed for having even entertained the idea.

"You should say yes," he finally said, making her look up again and meet his eyes. They were kind eyes. Full-of-love eyes.

"But Mulder…"

She didn't even know how to start a protest, so she just left her sentence unfinished, giving him room to complete his thoughts.

"He doesn't know anything about me, right? So, in his mind, you're a single woman who lives somewhere in this town, somewhere he doesn't know either. I see no harm as long as you're careful, which I know you always are."

She considered his words for a while, wondering if it could really be that simple. Maybe it could.

“Will you…” she hesitated a little before continuing. “... Will you be okay without me?”

He locked eyes with her, and there she read ‘what kind of question is that?’, but the words that came out of his mouth were lighter, bitter less.

“Of course I will. What makes you think that I won’t?”

She shook her head.

“I guess I’m just saying that we haven’t been apart for a single day since we started this life together. Finding ourselves alone, even if for only some hours, can be challenging. Scary, even.”

“Are you scared?”

She hesitated a little, trying to admit it to herself.

“Maybe, I don’t know.”

“You’ll be fine too, Scully. I promise. And if you’re not, you can always say you don’t want to go anymore.”

She nodded, considering this worst case scenario that wasn’t at all that bad. It was this way of his, of filling her heart with hope, that still made her weak in the knees from time to time.

“I love you,” she said in a low voice as a response.

He smiled at her, his eyes surprised upon hearing those words. It’s not like she never said it, but it wasn’t exactly very frequent either.

“You’re cute when you get all sappy,” he said, smirking.

She couldn’t help chuckling.

“Mulder, shut up.”

She then walked towards him, kissed his cheek, and left the room. She still needed some time to think, but maybe she would go talk to father Henderson the following day.

—------------------------------------

FIVE MONTHS LATER

She sighed as she stared at the card in her hand for the millionth time. This definitely wasn’t what she was expecting when she started volunteering, and yet it felt like it was something for which she was secretly hoping.

Mulder entered the bedroom just then, giving her no chance of hiding the small piece of paper that would probably change her life. She had been hiding it enough anyway; it was time for the truth.

She took a deep breath before looking at him.

“We need to talk,” she said quietly.

“Uh oh, don’t tell me you want to file for divorce.”

Close enough, she thought, but didn’t say anything. Did her eyes show what was going on in her mind though?

“Okay, you didn’t laugh or say anything about us not being married, so now I’m scared.” He sat beside her on the bed slowly. “What did I do?”

She interlaced their fingers, stroked his thumb with her own, then let go and silently handed him the business card.

His eyes went over the name of the doctor and his occupation a few times, but she couldn’t read his mind this time.

“Is this guy someone you’re interested in or…”

She chuckled in spite of herself, shaking her head. He ran one of his hands through his forehead as if saying ‘phew’, which made her laugh a little. She had to keep going, though.

“Remember that boy whose life I saved about two months ago, the one who went into cardiac arrest while I read to him?”

He just nodded, waiting.

“It turns out the board of directors have kept a close eye on me since then.”

Mulder clenched his jaw, probably unconsciously. He was starting to get worried, she could tell.

“Does that mean we are not safe anymore?”

She shook her head, although the answer to that would really depend on how you looked at the whole situation.

“It means they took an interest in me, enough to think that I would be a good addition to their medical team. Well, not me exactly, because all of that happened to Katherine, not Dana.”

“And what does Dana want to do?”

“I have to give them an answer by the end of the week.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

She sighed and closed her eyes briefly, knowing what she was getting into.

“I want to say yes.”

He averted his gaze to somewhere on the floor, and it took him a long time to say anything afterwards.

“How long have you had to consider this?”

“About a week.”

“And why are you telling me just now?”

“Because I needed to think, and to talk to someone before I made up my mind.”

“You needed to talk to someone? Shouldn’t you be talking to me instead? I mean—” He raised his voice, which kind of startled her for a moment.

She interrupted him before he jumped to conclusions.

“I needed to talk to an attorney, to know what chances I had of having my name cleared without anyone knowing where you are. I needed to know if I could stop being Katherine No-Last-Name and go back to being Dana Katherine Scully.”

Mulder stood up and ran his hands through his face, pacing the room like he always did when he needed to put his thoughts together in a coherent manner. It took him some time to speak again.

“What did this attorney say?”

“She said I have to move out and live by myself for a while to make a convincing case. That means we’ll only be able to start the whole process about a month after I get my own place, just to be on the safe side. They have to actually believe that I regret my life choices and want to repent, so to speak. I will probably be closely watched, followed, my phone may be tapped… well, you know as well as I do what the FBI can do to catch someone on a lie.”

His eyes teared up while he heard her, and he just nodded when she finished her sentence. Then, in a low, hurt voice, he asked.

“Do you regret all your life choices?”

She stood up, got closer, tried to hold his hand, but he withdrew it before their fingers touched completely.

“Mulder, no. I don’t regret a single day. How many times will I have to say that?”

“I’m sorry, Scully, I’m having a hard time believing that right now.”

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and then opened them again, speaking more calmly this time.

“Do they know at the hospital that you are not who you say you are?”

She nodded.

“I had to tell Dr. Mills,” she pointed at the business card that was now on the bed. “My first reaction to his proposal was to say I couldn’t, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. So, the next time I went to the hospital, he approached me and I just… told him.”

Mulder’s face changed into a are-you-kidding-me? expression, because now he was probably thinking she had compromised their location and everything they worked hard to hide. It pissed her off that he would think something like that, as if he didn’t know her at all.

“I lied about a few aspects.” She continued, trying not to let her anger show. “He believes the story that I used to be in a relationship with someone who is wanted by the FBI, not that we are still together. But, apparently, this was no big deal to him because he said they can wait for me if I truly want this job. They even offered to let me start as an assistant of sorts while things don’t get solved.”

“You must have made quite an impression.” He scoffed.

The resentment in his voice didn’t let her see it as a compliment. Instead, it made her feel as if she had done it all on purpose, just to hurt him. Her eyes flooded immediately. This wasn’t supposed to go this way.

Her reaction to his words was probably what brought him back from his high of self-pity and anger because his face softened, his eyes moistened, his tongue wet his lips and his voice was low when he spoke.

“Look, I’m not mad that you’re trying to take your life back, you deserve it more than anyone. It’s just not exactly easy to accept that you’re choosing medicine over me. And I guess I never thought we would break up, let alone like this.”

Of course he would get it all wrong.

“Mulder, listen to me.” This time, she grabbed his hand and he allowed it. “We are not breaking up and I’m not choosing medicine over you. We just have to stay apart for a few months until things get cleared. It won’t be easy for either of us, but I would not be doing any of this if it meant I would never see you again. We may have never exchanged vows, but what we have IS until death do us part, do you hear me? Unless you are now having second thoughts about it.”

He stared at her for a moment, digesting her words, then pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her. Their foreheads touched, in that comfortable and intimate way they had always done since their early days together.

“I am not having second thoughts.” He whispered. “It is until death do us part for me, too.”

He rubbed his nose against hers. “Promise you’ll come back?”

“I won’t rest until I do.”

He smiled.

“Congratulations, by the way. And I’m sorry for being such a jerk.”

“Thank you.”

Her answer was followed by a kiss, which was eventually followed by clothes on the floor and a slightly creaking bed.

When she woke up the following day, the first thing she did was to go to the hospital and talk to Dr. Mills.

—------------------------------------

THREE MONTHS LATER

She wasn’t yet cleared of all charges, but at least she was allowed to use her own name and act like an assistant at the hospital. It felt like her intern years sometimes, and some of these times she wondered if she wasn’t too old to be doing this. No, she was just tired.

She arrived at her apartment after one of those long days and checked outside the window to see if the usual agents were there to watch her. Strangely, they weren’t. This had become her routine ever since she started the process of being ‘reinstated into society’, and it was so familiar at this point that sometimes she felt like making coffee and taking some to the man and the woman on stakeout duty.

She smiled as she closed the blinds, thinking that she and Mulder could have used some freshly brewed coffee in their days.

Her smile then faded because thinking of Mulder always sent a pang of sadness to her chest.

Not seeing him for the past three months was worse than she had foreseen. She was constantly worried, wondering if he was taking care of himself, if he still had fun watching trash movies on Saturday nights even though she wasn’t there to make fun of them with him. Did he leave his office from time to time or did he start living there so his obsessions would always be close? How often did he think of her? Did he still have any resentments regarding her choices?

She sighed. It was frustrating that she still could do nothing about it.

She had thought of writing him small letters and have her mother deliver them to him, but she quickly changed her mind as she remembered Maggie could also be followed.

So all the notes and letters became journal entries instead. Maybe she would show him someday, maybe she would keep it private. Only the future could tell.

Her mind had traveled so far away that, when the phone rang, she startled.

The woman on the other side didn’t have to state her name for her to know who it was.

“We got it, Dana! No more hiding for you. You are now officially Dana Katherine Scully again.”

Scully’s heart raced, her eyes filled with tears, a huge smile took over her face, and she heard in a dream-like state her attorney’s instructions on what she had to do next . She barely even noticed when she put the phone back on the hook.

No more hiding for you.

She was so happy and so relieved that she cried for a long time, and when she slept that night, she didn’t have any nightmares or woke up every two hours.

It was about time.

—---------------------------------------------------

THREE WEEKS LATER

It took her a while to truly believe she wasn't being watched anymore. Sometimes, she would just drive somewhere far to see if someone followed, to see how safe she was if she were to stay away from her apartment or the hospital. There was never any sign that they hadn't believed her or that she was falling into a trap.

Not that she could, or would, abandon her apartment as if she had never lived there, but she could use it less often, maybe pretend she still lived there when her hours at work required her to be somewhere closer just so she could squeeze in some sleep.

So, trusting her instincts and careful observations, she woke up one day and decided to go home.

The dirt road that led to the house in the middle of nowhere finally came into view, making her heart skip a beat.

Remember to breathe, Dana. She told herself silently.

She was dying to see Mulder, but she was also afraid of what she would find. Was he still the same person she had left all those months ago? Did spending time with himself make him reconsider everything they agreed to before she went away?

In just a few moments, she stopped in front of the porch.

When she got out of the car, he was already waiting at the door, looking a little shy even though a beautiful smile rested on his face.

"Hi", she said, walking slowly towards him.

"Hi", he mumbled back.

It was all they could say before their bodies practically crashed into each other as they hugged so tightly that, if it were possible, they would have merged and become only one person.

She didn’t know how long they stood there before she moved in his arms just enough to look at him properly, analyze his features, plant a light kiss on his so-very-soft lips.

“I promised I would be back,” she whispered, still so close that her mouth brushed against his as she spoke.

Instead of saying something back, he glued his lips to hers, raised one of his hands to the back of her neck and slowly let his tongue meet hers. It was as if they were having their first kiss all over again.

It didn’t take long for his hands to go to her waist and lift her off the floor, prompting her legs to wrap around his hips.

They didn’t say anything as he took her inside, laid her on the couch and kissed every single part of her face, or when they took each other’s clothes off and slowly filled their mouths and hands with nipples, lips, necks and usually hidden skins, while their hearts exploded with emotions and sensations. Mulder’s first words came when he himself came.

“Don’t ever leave me again,” he panted, as he pumped one last time inside her.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” she said, breathing into his mouth as he circled her clit in just the right way to help her reach her orgasm in just a few seconds.

As she collapsed onto him, still catching her breath, she whispered.

“So, how’ve you been?”

They both chuckled as they realized they hadn’t exchanged more than a few sentences since she arrived.

“How about we talk about everything on our comfortable bed instead of this old, hard couch?”

“That’s the best idea you’ve ever had,” she joked, kissing his lips once more before getting up.

They went to bed and there they stayed. They had a lot to share with each other and she figured they wouldn’t be getting much rest for the next few days, just the way she wanted it to be.

For the first time in a very long time, she felt as if she had almost everything she ever wished for.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A whole new meaning to Gay Chicken.

(For: Anonymous raffle winner!)

[howtotalktoghosts]

for @milfygerard 🖤

[popppyfur]

sometimes when i like characters thisssss much i like drawing unnecessarily complicated comics of them having a normal ass conversation

[sainz100]

Daniel & Max being cute about Max holding the mic during this 2017 Austrian GP interview

[jackshiccup]

some modern hijacks for the soul (and bumping shoulders as a love language)

shoutout @midoristeashop for these swag brushes <3

[secretly-a-catamount]

I’m sorry, but if you think that Raoul wouldn’t switch places with Christine to be bait for the Phantom if he could, you’re just objectively wrong (it’s okay, I still love you).

[stellorc]

Amor Vincit Omnia My gift for my dear @commander-krios as part of the KOTOR Gift Exchange! Such a pleasure to paint her beautiful Revan and her spoils of war - as a friend so nicely put it ;)

[paunchsalazar]

Dragon Age: Origins - epilogue drawings

[crimeboys]

found this screenshot from an exchange form i did and am losing my mind

[soveryanon]

Akai mostly hanging around Yuusaku&Yukiko lately is catnip to me.

I love how Yukiko keeps gushing about how handsome Akai is - to her husband, in front of her kid, in front of the whole world on camera airing live while impersonating her husband, no shame whatsoever, Yukiko is living her best life.

It had also been her first impression ten years ago!

Courtesy of Sera, we know that Yukiko was wearing make-up when visiting Akai-Subaru to help him with his disguise~ (And that's not a glass for water, uh).

(GA also said he liked to think that Yukiko calls Akai "Shuu-chan"... SHUU-CHAN...)

Akai himself is shown mostly appreciative of her help, and a bit amused!

And Yuusaku.

There is something incredibly insane about Yuusaku having written a whole script, BLATANTLY BASED ON AKAI, that went on to receive a PRESTIGIOUS AWARD, while he had heard about Akai's existence a few months ago (at most)?

"Wizard of the Ripples" wasn't only about the two future Silver Bullets meeting; it was also Akai&Yuusaku (and Shinichi) solving the case in parallel, without meeting, with Yukiko as the only witness.

And Yuusaku&Akai have been talking and theorizing together - they're the ones who got the "KARASUMA" riddle, and Yuusaku&Yukiko immediately teamed up with Akai when they thought Vermouth could be after them (bringing the rest of the FBI along, but we saw Akai directing the bug-sweeping operations afterward and he had stayed with the Kudous in their room).

Much to Conan's dismay, Yuusaku&Yukiko&Akai have been in cahoots together... and inflicted the Akai&Shinichi Strategy on Shinichi himself.

Look at Conan being kept of the loop, for once - he might have engineered the meeting between Furuya and Akai&the Kudous (Furuya, at least, estimated that he was behind it), but he doesn't know enough of what transpired since... he doesn't get the "tea party" reference (Yukiko asking around which tea the guests would like to drink).

And in return, Akai has so much respect for Yuusaku's strategizing... that he has no problem receiving small dispatching orders from Yuusaku, and that he doesn't hesitate to tell his own boss to wait it out for Yuusaku's advice. Just normal things to do, he's basically the Kudous' (watch)dog at this point!

(Akai still thinks that the FBI plans tend to suck, but NOW he has someone they can refer to for guidance.)

I love the small details added in the anime adaptation that Furuya was absolutely dumbfounded upon seeing the Kudous, when he infiltrated the manor, and seeked out confirmation from Akai that what was unfolding was actually happening for real. Akai's little nod, as he's vouching for Yuusaku&Yukiko!

^that's his "Aren't my sugar parents cool, Rei-kun? :D" face.

It's also extremely logical that, since the Kudous are back, Akai doesn't need to stay disguised as "Subaru" while indoors anymore (the Kudous can now answer and welcome any guest, invited or not)... but it also means that Akai is now seen roaming inside of the house WITH HIS HAIR BARE TO THE WORLD AND IN COSY SWEATERS, AND???

This is absolutely depraved, coming from him?!

(HIS BARE! HAIR! WITHOUT THE BEANIE?! SHOWING HIS MOST INTIMATE PART?!)

(It also makes me emotional that he seems to be reverting to a fashion style that feels like home - very close to Tsutomu 17 years ago. He's fine! He's in his healing arc, being sugarbabied and offered tea and mystery to solve!)

My overall points are:

the first episodes with Yuusaku&Yukiko gave me the impression that they're in an open relationship, with lots of occasional nonsense and jealousy (and Shinichi knows, guesses too much, doesn't want to hear anything about this nonsense and has been very happy to live far away from it for the last few years)

Akai, who isn't married to his childhood friend, and who has dated TWO DIFFERENT PERSONS, DO YOU REALIZE HOW UNHEARD-OF THAT IS IN THIS UNIVERSE, is the DCMK-verse equivalent of promiscuous.

In conclusion: they fork, your honour.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

For vaggie that spear is her support animal/therapist

For charlie, it's a rival she'd like to throw in lava but can't cause, it's vaggies support 'animal'

silly headcanon plot twist- Charlie's jealously at the spear ISN'T silly or irrational at all, it's a subconscious manifestation of Charlie's desperation for her girlfriend to actually open up emotionally to HER instead of to a WEAPON, confide fears and problems in CHARLIE, and a very frustrated, very also-emotionally-constipated-in-her-own-way Charlie doesn't wanna pin that frustration on Vaggie directly so she deflects all her anger to the spear, which as an inanimate objects, can't get any hurt feelings over this or decide Charlie is too much and dump her

we've done it. we've cracked the silly headcanon and found the angst waiting underneath XD XD XD

or maybe the above is all just what the hazbin crew speculates together, in their weekly "there's no way those two idiots don't have shit going on in their relationship" chaggie hotel gossip meet-ups

[mochiajclayne]

silly one piece headcanon where tiktok existed in canonverse and the heart pirates shared one tiktok account so their fyp is an amalgamation of everyone's preferences which worked out fine until the algorithm redirected them to a luffy edit created by the barto club.

at first, they brushed it off but suddenly there was a collection, cheekily named as 👒. no big deal for the hearts, they respected the strawhats and held luffy in high regard.

until they opened the comment section of each video saved in said collection and they found their account saying stuff like "he's so precious, I love him"; "my sunflower"; "sunshine incarnate"; "cute", etc.

the crew knows one person responsible for the otherwise sappy shenanigan and confronting their captain isn't an issue except the hearts are secretly sending his pictures directly to the strawhats (it was an achievement to hide the entire thing from law) and the latest update that they got was luffy filled an entire album full of law's photos.

[raayllum]

They are very mean to me

[camp-camp-out-of-context]

Vera: Ah! You are supposed to be American cosmonaut! How does it feel to have failing space program?

Space Kid: What the fuck did you just say to me?

[simply-sithel]

and when you move, I'm moved by Catja [link]

A wee 60 pages- true mini, bound for the @renegadepublishing Tiny Book Bang. Typeset by Indoor Cat Press.

.

...this book was so tiny, I lost it in my Drafts! Sharing now, almost a year later, as the 2024 Tiny Books Bang nears it's 2nd typeset reveal