#Okay I'm done spamming the tag/your dashes

[littlecajunlady]

Look at them 😭

[22degreehalo]

eugh and I am STILL struggling with what to do with fandoms on this tumblr

I know that everyone reblogs that post about how if your moot changes fandoms that's a-okay and you'll either accept or block this new spamming of some random character you've never heard of before. But I can't help feeling a bit bad about it.

TBH secretly, and I feel rly bad about it, but... I actually don't like it when people spam stuff I don't know anything about on tumblr. (Or reblogging the same post 5 times. Sorry.) It's just... empty clutter on my dash, which I too often use as a sorta dopamine IV for if I'm in desperate need of brain stimulation. (Not as much as I used to but still.)

But maybe that's just because I'm too hesitant to block tags. I'm finally starting to block fandom tags now and like at first I felt really bad like 'of all the fandoms you chose to block, that one?!' but now that I've done a few it's easier. It's not that I hate to see it it's just it interrupts my dashboard's flow.

But also just. I really do think that compared to most people the fandoms I go between tend to vary REALLY widely. Most people will go from e.g. fantasy video game fandom 1 to fantasy video game fandom 2 or whatever and there's a good chance fans of one will like the latter. And I know this sounds very 'I'm so quirky lolz' but just. objectively. I am pretty sure that Star Trek TOS -> Homestuck -> Little Busters! -> Supernatural -> American Revolution RPF -> Ensemble Stars! -> Fire Emblem (especially Genealogy of the Holy War) is. an unusual list of Main Fandoms.

And partly that is my brain's inherent craving for novelty. I *need* a certain level of Different Things, vaguely defined. Which explains why I tend to gravitate towards fandoms with a lot of different quirky characters (like Homestuck, Ensemble Stars! etc.) or Visual Novels, where each route registers as a Different Story in my brain so it's like I get five Different Things for one.

So I'll have, like. ONE fantasy game I play. But then I need to mix it up with other really different things. So I can get a multitude of vibes. Same thing with my fanfic: I'm constantly trying new things, and can't really get motivated to write something unless I feel like I couldn't easily read it somewhere (thus my total lack of creative motivation while I was into Supernatural).

Anyway the point of it is. I'm just too aware that my followers are real people, who presumably followed me for something they enjoy seeing on their dash. Probably just agreeing with my opinions in general. And in general I like to reblog things that I think people will. Like. Not in a 'This'll Do Numbers' way but in a 'I like contributing positively to a community' sort of way I guess.

But it's also a matter of post type. I mind much less when people write heaps of text posts or whatever about their stuff; sometimes it's fun to see analyses even of things I know nothing about, and I can feel their passion shining through. It's much more cluttery when people do heaps of e.g. fanart reblogs without commentary.

But then that's what sends me into stasis whenever I see a post I like and want to reblog but I feel like I have to Write Something Good Enough in the tags. Which is an inherently very very silly idea I know lmao. But it was honestly a bit freeing several months (years????? timye.) ago when I allowed myself to just hit reblog with no tags at all.

IDK like look I want to just be free and make my blog filled with nice things that I like but just like with masking I can't divorce myself from the context that these are things I'm sharing with real people. And maybe it's just a loneliness in me that because my tastes are so absurdly specific and radically Different it's hard to find other people who'll really relate to more than one or two of them.

Anyway thanks for coming to my TED Talk, this one's called 'thoughts about this blog I've had variously for the last five years or so which is funny because at some point that'll be more than half the life of my presence on tumblr lmao'

[kourtwrites]

i'm really not trying to be rude, just honest and you're very welcome to not post this at all but your constant promoing of your rp makes it seem like you're kind of desperate for apps and not happy with your current mems

I’m not going to lie I debated even posting this, but I decided I want to because I want to clarify a few things just incase anyone else feels this way.

First of it’s not my rp? I’m not an admin there, the admins are Becca and Drea. I’m just a member of the group. I do know both admins and have known them for a while, but I’m still just a member. They have never asked me to promo or anything like that. I’ve done this myself because I love the group and feel passionate about it. So to be blunt I’m not desperate for apps or unhappy with current members, because it’s not my group? 

Second off I do want to address the notation that I’m not happy with current members. The members of this groups are some of my best friends and I spent most of my time talking/interacting with them online. I love every single person in that group! Some of them I just met in this group, but other’s I’ve known upwards for 4+ years. Plus I can promise you if I didn’t like the members I wouldn’t be in the group or promo it. 

I do want to point out that I’ve always promoted this way though for every single group I’ve been apart of mod or not. If you’d like you’re welcome to check back I use to promo heavily when I was apart of MIO, BTS, and HG. It’s just who I’ve always been? It doesn’t mean I’m unhappy or desperate for something. When I’m in a group and I love it I want to share that love with other people. Half the rps I’ve joined are off people recommending them to me, that’s why I promo. Because someone else could see the group, join, and end up falling in love. It’s not meant to be a negative thing or that I’m out here scouting? It’s just me wanting to see wanted connections come to life, wanting to see new and interesting characters, and even a little of me wanting to see some of the rps I love playing against. I mostly just like rping! 

Also just to note here I will always promo my friends when I see their groups or I’m apart of them. Hell I will shamelessly self promo at times too and I have when I’ve been an admin of a group.

I know this got longer than I intended, but I guess what I’m trying to say here is; If the group gets new members that’s amazing, but if they don’t it’s okay too because I am happy where I’m at and who I’m with. 

P.S. I’ll be honest I never knew it came off this way or that it was being reblogged that much. I usually just spam the dash for a few hours then roll out like I normally do. In effort to be more cautious of those who follow me I’ll reblog it less, because I’m not trying to be an annoyance here. If you want you’re welcome to block the tag it’s rp promo, but if you want to unfollow me that’s cool too, because at the end of the day I’m still going to reblog the group.