#Ok I'll shuddup now <3 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kissimirrit · 3 years ago

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Could you Do 1,4,7,14 for the Ask Meme

:DD yessssss!!!!

this got kinda long so i'll put it under a read-more!

1. Tell us about your current project(s) – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

SO i technically have 2 current active WIPs, and few very very rudimentary rough notes for other ideas. so i'll focus on the two currently active:

project 1: i started this first and i planned for it to actually be my first multi-chapter fic, since before then i exclusively wrote one-shots. it's currently on hiatus because after starting it i got 1 and a half additional jobs and i had also started project 2 after i finished chapter 1 of it as a small side project (it did not stay small.) but basically it's a fake dating au. i love fake dating aus they are my favorite aus. but i like them in the sort of way where like, nothing really changes? nobody is surprised? and they don't even need to "act"? they just be themselves and then they just don't change anything after because honestly what was the point. they're practically fuckin married. progress wise, i have some rough notes for it, but i haven't started on chapter 2 yet because i have OCD and my brain needs me to finish project 2 first. but what i love most about it is that i can go ham with water and drowning metaphors. sink or swim bitches; and that it has a completely different title on my google docs than on AO3 — it's AO3 title was spur of the moment.

project 2: i started this at the start of december more or less. it was going to be a SHORT ONE-SHOT, like under 10k!! and then it kept. growing. and now it's over 10k and it's still in the super-duper beginning. and i'm beginning to think that maybe this is going to be my first multi-chapter fanfic because i can't drop 50k and go "lol here's a one-shot". i mean i COULD but everyone would hate that. it was progressing really fast until i got overloaded on my 3 jobs for the holiday season. and things are finally kinda slowing down now (at least until my caseworker starts scheduling me so i have 0 days off again). but it's more or less about a character realizing they're trans in the early 2000s, which is just a little bit before when i realized i was trans, so very similar time periods back when trans stuff was very very much less known. and what i love the most is that like, i'm writing from the perspective of a character whom i very much see as having OCD and gender dysphoria, and i have those things? and it's super fucking cathartic to write out these things that i, too, experience? the intrusive thoughts, the magical thinking, doing things a specific number of times or repeatedly doing it until the final time feels right, the mental rituals, the compulsions that itch and itch until you DO them and your mind goes at ease once more — it's just something i'm finding to be incredibly cathartic to write.

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

absolutely revealing my ass here with this one (yes i keep my google docs bg beige — it helps with writing!!!!!! shuddup!!!!) but i liked how soft and romantic these lines were? but i'm gonna let you in on a secret: my brain always goes to clay and bridges and architecture when it comes to trying to write anything romantic. i am aro. i am ace. i only know 3 things: clay. bridges. architecture.

i liked this one so much that i color-coded it as a reminder to myself to make it the ao3 summary.

ok, these next few are all from the same doc.

*slams OCD and gender dysphoria together*. i liked how snappy these lines were, really getting across the magical thinking aspect and counting compulsions tying in together, with a "special number" (3). this specific thing was pulled directly from me, from the time my dad was late by an hour from picking me up from my first job when i was a teen, and i recounted the tiles over and over again. telling myself if it was an odd number, he'd come get me, that he didn't get in a crash. the number kept coming out even and i kept recounting. i picked 3 as a "special number" for this character because i noticed they kinda do things in 3s a lot, mumbles to himself in 3s, that sort've thing.

there's another line that kinda reflects the whole magical thinking into compulsions thing that comes before this (i didn't wanna screencap it): "—and found himself repolishing the door knobs at no one’s request, but because he felt compelled to after seeing his thumb leave a cloudy imprint on the surface and thought that if he didn’t clean it right now then his father might have another workplace accident that once again prevented them both from coming home."

everything is OCD.

i just liked how these ones were written. [:

ok no more i'm stopping myself here. any more and i might as well just link you the entire google doc.

7. What do you think are the characteristics of your personal writing style? Would others agree?

cheesy overblown purple prose. extended metaphors. flowery. [noun] [conjunction] [adjective] [period or comma] [synonym of adjective]. "oh."

would others agree? i dunno! i've only just recently have been overcoming my own shame in sharing my writing. most people, friends included, don't know what works i've written aside from the 1 single thing that i didn't publish anonymously. so who's to say?

14. At what point in writing do you come up with a title?

immediately. i feel like i can't write if i don't have a perfect title, or a potential pool of titles picked out i can confidently choose from? i feel like a title is what sets the tone for my writing and if i'm not feeling that tone, i struggle to get into a groove or a writing trance that i can just go beastmode in.

i have a google doc i keep ideas for fic titles in. and i almost always pull titles from song lyrics. and when i write down notes for fics in my phone notes (i always do it in my phone notes because they just come at me while i'm trying to sleep) potential titles are ALWAYS the first thing i list.

(these are for 2 different fics btw. yes i know a lot of the possible titles are the same. i like to reuse potential titles in case one of them sticks.)

yes the title for that one has to be an egg joke.

#ask games

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