#Oh and if you're a chloe hater

[muggle-born-princess]

Dear Chloé Haters,

Now that "Revolution" has aired, I hope you're proud of yourselves.

I hope you're proud that she's gonna live with her abusive mother, I hope you're proud that she lost everything; including the two friends (Adrien and Sabrina) that she actually cared for and were willing to help her, I hope you're proud that no one, not even her own father or sister, loves her. I especially hope you're proud that you got your wish: That she's worse that Gabriel, Lila, Nathalie, and Félix, and that she's an irredeemable monster because your precious Marinette and your God Thomas Astruc said so; just so you can have your stupid ass Love Square ship (Which I'm starting to despise more and more thanks to how poorly written this show is and because of you guys.) and that she might be (Key word: might) written out for good because Thomas himself hates her for the most pathetic fucking reason ever.

If you can honestly look at this and go "Woohoo yes! It's about time that bitch got karma! She had it coming all these years!"

A. You don't know a damn thing about karma and how it works.

B. You also don't know what it's like to be abused and how abuse can affect someone, especially someone as young as Chloe was when her mom left her.

And C. You especially don't know what it's like to be change for the better, only to fail repeatedly because old habits are hard to change for the better.

Oh, and don't you dare fucking give me that "Well Mylène said her mom left her and she turned out fine" or "Well Gabriel was a shitty person as a teenager, and he only got worse" crap. I don't want to hear a goddamn thing about those shitty ass arguments. That just proves that you're biased and Thomas doesn't know a fuck ton about abused victims and how they cope differently.

I don't want to deal with you. Not now. Not ever.

Get off my page if you hate Chloe. Block me for all I care. Hell, call me a bully or racist apologist or hell, even a sociopath apologist for all I care.

I. Don't. Give. A. Fuck.

You got your wish, and now my wish is to not associate with any of you people.

Bye.

[lithium80writer]

Bad Things (Eddie Munson Short Story)

⚠️Warnings: Explicit sexual content. MINORS DNI. Toxic relationship. Drugs. Angst.⚠️

Summary: Modern AU. Rockstar Eddie. Nova Gray is a pop star and the on again/off again girlfriend of rockstar Eddie Munson. Both of them are at the height of their career. Fame and trouble follow these two everywhere they go. They both know they are no good for each other but can they stay away? Just a heads up that this will not be typical sweet Eddie. He's kind of an asshole. But a hot one.

Characters and intro, Chapter one

Chapter Two: Eddie Fucking Munson

****Don't matter what you say. Don't matter what you do. I only wanna do bad things to you..****

Nova's POV

You had an interview today which you were dreading already. Rebecca White was one of the most nosy people in the industry and you already knew her questions would consist of nothing but Eddie Munson.

"You're gonna do great, babe." Max says gently as he kisses your cheek. You give him a half smile as you grab your purse and sling it over your shoulder. "Fuck.. where's my phone? I'm gonna be late." you groan as you flip the blanket on your bed searching for it.

You hear it ringing in the distance and Max makes it there before you. You see Eddie's face on the screen and Max's turns to you, his eyes full of questions.

"The performance at the VMA's is soon. I'm sure that's what it's about." you lie as you take your phone. Though broken up, you and Eddie still had to perform your duet together in a few days. That should be fun.

"Yeah, I'm sure... Call me when you're done with the interview. Maybe we can grab lunch somewhere?" Max calls as you head for the door.

"Sure!" you call back slamming the door behind you. You run to the elevator as your phone continues to ring. "Hello?" you answer the phone in a rush.

"Hey Princess."

God, his voice makes me melt.

"I don't have time to talk, Eddie. I'm in a hurry." you say quickly as push open the doors to the outside world. You see your driver parked and waiting for you.

"How's my favorite girl?" he continues anyways as you slide in the backseat of the car.

"When did I become your favorite over Stacie, or Jessica, or what was the bendy one's name... oh yeah... Trixie?" you snap.

"You're stressed. What's going on... hey, no teeth.." he mumbles.

"Are you seriously getting your dick sucked while you're calling me? Fuck you, Eddie!"

"Oh come on, you're the only one I let use teeth..."

You hang up the phone and lean back against the seat with a sigh. He's literally impossible.

Why does everything in me want to tell the driver to head there instead? Why am I always craving him?

You grab your phone again flipping through your contacts.

"I fucking hate him." you say as soon as she picks up and Chloe snorts.

"No you don't. But I've told you a thousand times, come to the dark side, baby. We have so much fun." she teases.

Chloe Monroe. My only true friend in this industry. Proud lesbian and hater of most of the male species.

"I do. He's such an asshole." you groan and she sighs deeply.

"So you're trying to decide if you should go fuck him or not." she states bluntly.

"What? No!" you protest. "Shit... maybe. I miss him." you mumble.

"Suck it up, baby. You need to go to this interview and then you need to go home to your sweet hunk of a man." Chloe says sternly.

"You're right. I know you're right."

"I'm always right. But if you do go, tell me all the filthy details later." she giggles and you just roll your eyes.

"I love you. Gotta go."

"Love you!"

Your driver meets your eyes through the mirror and shakes his head with a laugh.

"You do keep an old man like me entertained." Sal laughs and you can't help but give him a smile. He pulls up in front of the building and you take a deep breath before slipping out of the car.

I can do this. Just talk about my music. Stay focused.

The fact that it's filmed in front of a live audience wasn't helping your stress level. This was your first interview since your breakup six months ago. People wanted to know what happened. Everyone wanted to know the dirty details of your life as if it wasn't breaking your heart into pieces.

These people didn't care about you. They just wanted information. It was just the business.

You made your way to hair and makeup. The guy who tended to you was a sweetheart. He kept the conversation light and focused on getting you perfect for the camera.

And then came Rebecca.

"Nova! You look incredible!" she gushes as you stand up from the chair. You give her the fakest of smiles as she pulls you in for a hug.

"Thank you. So do you." you reply sweetly. "So I just wanted to make sure we were clear on the topics..."

"I know, dear. No talk of that handsome boy of yours... is he still yours?"

Fuck this shit.

"Rebecca, with all due respect, I don't have to do this interview."

"I'm only kidding. I received a list of all the off-topic things before the show. No Munson. No diets. No Max? Such a shame.. he's a cutie." she chatters.

"Are we clear?" you say shortly.

"I'll see you soon." she disappears swiftly and you feel even more nervous than before.

You quickly dial your manager and she answers immediately.

"You can't back out."

"She's gonna spend the entire interview talking about the breakup. I can already tell." you argue.

"Nova, you need this. You need to get back out there. You need to talk about your new album. You need to show them he didn't destroy you." Lisa pushes back.

You pause for a second weighing your options. She's gonna eat me alive.

"Put your big girl panties on. Those sexy ones, with the little bow." Lisa chuckles.

You exhale deeply and tell her you'll call her after.

Here we fucking go.

You walk out on the stage and the crowd begins with their clapping and cheers. You look out and give them all a wave as you plaster a smile on your face.

You see Rebecca seated in her chair as you make your way across the stage. She stands and greets you before you take your place across from her.

The questions start simple. "How have you been?" "What new projects are you working on?"

She lets you talk about your new album which makes you feel excited and a little more relaxed. Maybe she won't bring him up.

"Nova will be performing a song from her upcoming album for the first time for all of you!" Rebecca cheers. The crowd is filled with excitement as you make your way to the side of the stage.

The lights dim and you take the mic in your hand.

"Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep

If I shall die before I 'wake

I pray the Lord my soul to take."

You speak the first verse slowly. You close your eyes and shut out the people around you. You feel the music running through your veins as you begin to sing.

"I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life.

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind.

They talk shit, but I love it every time.

And I realize..

I've tasted blood and it is sweet.

I've had the rug pulled beneath my feet.

I've trusted lies and trusted men.

Broke down and put myself back together again.

Stared in the mirror and punched it to shatters.

Collected the pieces and picked out a dagger.

I've pinched my skin in between my two fingers

And wished I could cut some parts off with some scissors.

"Come on, little lady, give us a smile"

No, I ain't got nothin' to smile about.

I got no one to smile for, I waited a while for

A moment to say I don't owe you a goddamn thing.

I, I keep a record of the wreckage of my life

I gotta recognize the weapon in my mind

They talk shit, but I love it every time

And I realize..

I'm no sweet dream, but I'm a hell of a night.

That I'm no sweet dream, but I'm a hell of a night.

No, I won't smile, but I'll show you my teeth.

And Imma let you speak if you just let me breathe.

I've been polite, but won't be caught dead.

Lettin' a man tell me what I should do in my bed.

Keep my exes in check in my basement,

'Cause kindness is weakness, or worse, you're complacent.

I could play nice or I could be a bully.

I'm tired and angry, but somebody should be.."

You lose yourself in your song as you perform. Fuck, I missed this.

"Someone like me can be a real nightmare, completely aware.

But I'd rather be a real nightmare than die unaware, yeah.

Someone like me can be a real nightmare, completely aware.

But I'm glad to be a real nightmare, so save me your prayers..."

You finish the song softly.

"I'm no sweet dream, but I'm a hell of a night.

That I'm no sweet dream, but I'm a hell of a night."

The crowd cheers wildly as the lights brighten. You smile and give your lip a little bite. They liked it.

You start to feel a new confidence. One that's been missing these past few months. Maybe Lisa was right. This was needed.

You take your seat again across from Rebecca who praises you dramatically. She's so fake. Her personality and her entire face. It's not my business.. I'm just saying. You wouldn't recognize her if you had met her 5 years ago.

"Dark and dramatic and sexy all at once. I love it!" she purrs.

You give her a smile and thank her before glancing at the clock. It's almost over.

"Now.. a question we've all been wondering.."

Don't do it.

Your smile immediately fades.

"What happened between you and Eddie Munson? Everyone thought the two of you would be together forever. Well maybe not forever.. this is the fourth time you guys have split? The last one was pretty nasty." she flings the words out before you can even process.

This bitch. I can't overreact. It's a taping but there are people here, fans. She knows what she's doing.

There are murmurs throughout the crowd.

Calm down, Nova. Breathe.

"I like to keep some things private. My romantic life being one of them. I hope everyone here can understand that." you repeat the rehearsed lines Lisa fed to you before the show.

"Well I wouldn't call getting into a fight in a bar in front of one hundred people very private... what started that? Did he cheat?" she lowers her voice on the last word as if everyone in the room can't hear your conversation.

"Rebecca, I was in this industry before Eddie. I am an artist. My entire life doesn't revolve around Eddie fucking Munson." you spit the last words and Rebecca does a dramatic gasp.

Shit.

"I think this interview is done." you quickly make your way off the stage.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

You call Sal and rush down the stairs. The paparazzi is waiting for you as you open the doors.

"Nova! Over here!" Shouts and screams surround you as the flashes blind your eyes. Sal quickly makes his way to you and helps you into the car.

He pulls off quickly as your tears begin to fall.

"Home, Ms. Gray?"

"No... I.. can you take me to see him?" you sniffle.

Sal nods and turns down the familiar street. He slowly comes to a stop in front of the apartment building.

"Want me to wait?" Sal asks as you open the door to leave.

"No. Thank you, Sal." you say before shutting the door behind you.

You walk in and the security guard gives you a nod as he lets you past him. You slip in the elevator and chew your lip as you watch the floor numbers rise.

You reach his floor and stand in front of his door. Your phone goes off in your pocket.

Max: Any requests for lunch or you want me to pick?

Fuck.

The door opens and you look up to see his dark brown eyes. A shit eating grin on his face.

"Hello, sweetheart."

*A/N: lyrics from Halsey's song Nightmare

Masterlist to follow along 🖤

[chickensoup1025]

Onto Bubbler...

Before it starts I wanted to say I have beef with Nino in this episode cause he makes his best friend's birthday about his hurt feelings and it's annoying and he didn't even get him a present

It was actually pretty nice of Plagg to try to give him that present

We love Sabine on this blog

Did Nathalie not even try to get him something herself??? She practically raised him!

Y'all should throw a small party at school if a house one isn't gonna work

Marinette is beyond thoughtful for MAKING him a gift.

EVEN CHLOE DIDNT REMEMBER IT WAS HIS BIRTHDAY???

Are you seriously telling me Paris's Teen Sweetheart didn't have a fan club that is celebrating his birthday at all? He's not getting letters in the mail? Or fans coming up to him at school? Or MORE people telling his dad to throw a party/throwing one for him??? This episode is just. Idk man.

Marinette has been a called a push over in the last two episodes (and this is the SECOND EPISODE) so it's amazing to see how far she's come!!!!

ADRIEN HAD A PHOTOSHOOT SCHEDULED ON HIS BIRTHDAY? THATS SO UGHHHHHHHHHH AND DURING HIS LUNCH BREAK TOO

Bro. Nino says he's gonna go to Adrien's house and Marinette and Alya are in the background. Cut to only Marinette and Alya at Adrien's house. Did Nino get lost????

Alya can you please tell Adrien later that it was from Marinette?

NATHALIE YOU SNAKE

Wild how Gabriel really did come out to talk to Nino. Ohhhh he wanted to make Nino an akuma. Gotcha.

DONT SIT ALONE AND BE UPSET NINO. THIS ISNT ABOUT YOU. BE WITH ADRIEN. HE WAS JUST TOLD ON HIS BIRTHDAY THAT HIS BEST FRIEND COULDNT EVER COME AROUND HIS HOUSE AND YOURE JUST GONNA WALK AWAY??? GO BACK TO SCHOOL TOGETHER AT LEAST????? Speaking of, that photoshoot was super quick? And why was he dropped off at his house? No way lunch break is that fast???? Go to school??????

Ugly ass akuma

Gabriel seriously made an akuma who specifically hates and is mad at him 🤦🏽‍♀️

What even counts as an "adult" here? 18+ or like out of university or like old enough to have kids or-

I'm a Nathalie hater I dunno yall I can't believe her this episode.

Just a weird ass akuma

This being his first party makes me wanna cry.

NINO IF YOU TURN ON A SLOW DANCE BECAUSE CHLOE ASKED YOU TO THEN YOU DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT ADRIEN. HE WAS VISIBLY UNCOMFORTABLE EARLIER THAT DAY WHEN SHE WAS UP ON HIM OH MY GOD.

NO ITS THE ADRIENETTE SLOW DANCE SONG NO NO NO

I think Ladybug should be allowed to use her power selfishly like this more often.

Did no one hear when Ladybug said "yours truly"??? It was pretty loud

No one knows how old ladybug and chat noir even are so people might be imagining they're also just stuck in bubbles lol. Oh god, if Adrien and Marinette were adults then they wouldn't be able to transform like that out in the open and THIS COULD HAVE BEEN SUCH A GOOD PLAN TO TRAP THEM OR FIND OUT THEIR IDENTITIES HAWKMOTH JESUS. What you have to do is: Bubbler brings all the bubbles together so you can see them all in one spot. Have Bubbler WATCH, not just throw a party. If someone inside transforms then great! You know who they are. But if LB and or CN show up anyway then you know they're not an adult and that whittles down your search BY A LOT.

Girl is pretty brave for writing "Love, Marinette"

Nathaniel has some Shuichi energy hm

Cool moves...

"But adults keep children, safe, and protected. They care for their kids, they love them!" "Most adults do, anyhow." JESUS CHRIST WAY TO GO STRAIGHT FOR THR HEART

Him throwing his staff for her to swing her yo-yo around was completely unnecessary-

You can really see how the stakes change between the beginning and end of the show. "Oh I'm stuck in a bubble for awhile and just have to wait an hour at most to go back to my normal day" to "oh the world is ending"

Adrien is such a good boy...

One day- NO ONE HOUR of no adults and suddenly every thing everyone is trying to mail will be late for another week. Huh

Marinette didn't take the credit 🥺

"You're amazing Marinette, someone Adrien will see that too." Cut to not even a full season later Adrien leaning back in Marinette's desk chair, "You're amazing, Marinette."

SOMEONE GET THIS BOY A LEGIT BIRTHDAY OR SO HELP ME

[chloexquinn]

"Oh." Chloe said with a nod. "Gotta do what you gotta do right?" She gave him an understanding smile. It was no secret to anyone that knew her that Chloe came from a life of privilege but growing up her lift hadn't always been all puppy dogs, rainbows and care bears. She was grateful for that but it also taught her to be thankful for what she has, which she is even though it may not always seem that way. "I mean, from the sound of it, it does seem like it's helped you..If the other members are as friendly as you are maybe I'll consider it." Once the waitress had returned to the table and set down her water Chloe thanked her before taking a sip and setting the glass back down. I know a girl like you shouldn't get mixed in with people like the Reapers. If he'd only known that Chloe wasn't entirely as sweet as she was coming off, however for all she knew he could be fooling her. You know the saying Ignorance Is Bliss? It's often how she felt about people who wore their heart on their sleeve. Through her eyes the kinder you came off the more likely you were to be taken advantage of which is why she kept that part of herself hidden. Reserved for those she actually trusted, but she'd be lying if she said she didn't miss the times she felt like she could let that part out.

"Yeah, I know that nightclub. I didn't know they owned it though, I've never been. I've heard of the Reapers too. I don't know too much about em but from what I've heard they're bad news." The corner of Chloe's lips turned upwards when Tyler stared to laugh. "Um, you should be flattered! They're adorable! " She quickly glanced back down at her screen to look at the picture once more. "Magic Tree Friends! Oh my God I love them! You're such a hater!" Hearing Damien casually clear his throat at the other end of the booth she reached for her water with her free hand and took a sip. It was go time. Moving her hand forward Chloe purposefully accidentally knocked the glass over and spilling it towards herself. She stood up once she felt the cold liquid come into contact with her skin. "Shit! I'm such a klutz. Do you have any napkins? Fuck, it got in my bag." She then propped her bag onto the table with a sigh.

Tyler enjoys having fun and not taking life too seriously. He's glad Chloe seems likeminded in that regard. Because life doesn't open many doors to nice encounters and good people. Sometimes its just nightmares, dead parents, and a small jail cell that smells like piss.

Tyler didn't want to be a part of the Vipers, he as forced into it. But he's doing his best to turn the gang around and offer its members and future prospects a better way. "I'm- yeah. A part of the Vipers." He considered telling her he was their new president after his grandfather passed away, but being the leader of a gang sounds pretty awful. As if putting together a group of delinquents was his idea. It wasn't. Like Chloe, Tyler was a lone wolf. He preferred to be alone. But sometimes the world has other plans for you that are out of your control.

"I know...I'm tired of looking over my shoulder too. I'll be honest with you. Life hasn't been easy for me. But it's been getting better since joining the Vipers. And since - well, getting back together with an old girlfriend. Maybe I'm just trying to return the favor. Like, give back or something. I just know a girl like you shouldn't get mixed in with people like the Reapers. They're awful. They own that nightclub on West Craven St. The House. Have you heard of it?"

Tyler's eyes roll back with a big dumb smile when Chloe leans forward with a picture of the Care Bears. "Oh my god. Please don't refer me to a Teletubby or whatever the fuck that is." He laughs, covering his face with his hands. Those colorful bears looked psychotic! Way worse than the Reapers he warned her about. "You know what they kind of remind me of? You ever see the show Magic Tree Friends? If not, look that up. I don't trust anything that colorful and happy."

[thealexchen]

i kinda get this bc tc is the most recent game, but i feel like the first three get unnecessarily harsh hate when it comes to dialogue, especially 1. It was written 7 years ago by clueless white frenchmen (badly) mimicking how american teens talked. and personally since max is so socially awkward I thought some of her odd dialogue made since for her since she’s kinda always out of the loop? but I didn’t think bts or lis2 had bad dialogue but they still get hated on, esp sean and chloes lines

LiS as a whole gets a lot of hate because it's easy to hate on. It's a very openly left-leaning game series in a pretty misogynistic industry; it's slow-paced and character-driven, and all of its protagonists are unconventional for video games. That hasn't stopped me from liking the series anyway because haters are honestly not worth my time, but I still think some scenes from LiS1 are a little embarrassing to rewatch. But that's kind of the point, right? You cringe at the angry teenagers telling off their parents, or the bullies who torment kids because they don't know any better, and young people with way too much grief on their shoulders. It's the reality of high school, despite the preppy boarding school setting.

Looking back, I believe that people think that outdated slang = bad writing, which is hardly the case. Outside of the slang, I thought LiS was well-written overall, particularly with exposition. You learn everything you need to know through Max's journal and context clues, but you don't have to read it if you don't want to. Then Chloe recognizes Max, and the scene in the truck catches you up in case you missed anything:

"'Oh, and thanks, Chloe!' After five years you're still Max Caulfield." (Chloe's a little sarcastic but also annoyed, and this line indicates they know each other already)

"I thought it would be quiet here. Feels so weird to be back." "So I guess Seattle sucked hard?" (Indicates that Max used to live here and Chloe has known her long enough to know where she moved to)

"So you came back to Arcadia for a teacher...not your best friend." (Establishes their prior friendship)

"My step-douche has a boatload of tools. Maybe you can fix it at my place." (Hints at what happened to William, shows off Chloe's snark more, establishes David and Chloe have a strained relationship, and sets up the next scene at Chloe's house)

It's all very tightly written and still manages to show off both of their personalities and character flaws (Max's indecision and flakiness, Chloe's impatience and long-held grudge). The cutscenes are also short and to-the-point, but the moments of calm let the player go at their own pace. And that's not even touching on the pacing, drastic tonal shift, plot twists, cinematography, and visual and environmental storytelling that makes this game so memorable.

[crystalblazefire]

mind if i shine some light on phastos and druig's dynamic real quick? It's very much implied that before they separated, druig liked hanging out in phastos' lab while he was working. They seem to be the most affected by not being able to do anything as humans hurt and kill eachother through centuries. And that scene at the end where phastos goes for the handshake but druig hugs him and tells him the planet's lucky to have him. It shows druig isn't as much of an asshole as you'd think he is? (1)

(2) like he can be a bit dickish but also, that's his 7000 year-old family, he loves them! Also the scene where the both of them and makkari are snuggled on the couch eating pizza, and makkari's smile when they hugged. It's so sweet i love them

you're totally right!! that's honestly one of the reasons i love druig, like at first i was like oh man, grouchy grouch being a hater is funny and Cute™ but then the more i thought about it and the more i inspected his interactions with the others, it became evident that he cares about all of them - he's just bitter about the situation they've been placed in. b/c they're forced to become bystanders and watch the very people they were sworn to protect, suffer. tbh, if i were druig, i'd be angry af too?? plus, families always fight and eventually come back together. i think druig displays that aspect of familial relationships the best through his interactions with the other eternals!!! he feels like the younger brother who's withdrawn and kind of sullen sometimes, but also loves to poke fun & stands up for his family members when they need him. anyway, props to marvel (and chloe zhao esp!!) for creating such a nuanced character. if anything he could've ended up becoming the average I Hate Everyone But You guy (which isn't necessarily bad per se, just kinda overdone.) yet his interactions with his fellow eternals and his motivations have made him into so much more than that. can you tell i'm obsessed with this character (i just realized this descended into a druig textpost when it was about druig AND phastos omg i'm so sorry?? but i also love my boy phastos and i would be open to any asks about him 🥰 i love the arc he goes through as well and i could wax poetic about that lmfao)

[measuringbliss]

Just as with Disco Elysium, here's my Life is Strange "how much I'd like to f*ck/date the guys" tier list. Please note I haven't played LiS2 lol I'll stay vague about True Colors but I *will* spoil LiS & LiS BtS.

Let's go in order, shall we?

Skip Matthews: Skip is THE guy I thirsted on, in Before the Storm. I was still high on that Will Graham thirst and this guy right here didn't nothing to quell my thirst. He has everything: the uniform, the hair, beard, posture, pathetic vibes... he even does nice music! And he's one of the few adults who's really chill with Chloe. Damn. I love him.

Charles Eriksen: Obviousy physically, he's my thing (what a surprise). Apparently his wife is dead and he became an alcoholic? Yeah it only adds to the whole thing. (You all know by now that I'm a lost cause lmao)

Diego Morales: Have you *seen* him?

Brody Holloway: Oh a bear journalist with glasses, what's not to like? Apparently he's even a nice guy!

Frank: Listen at this point if you're still surprised, there's nothing I can do for you. He's not relationship material but. He can get it.

Gabe Chen: COME. ON. What a stud. Everybody loves him and that's for a reason. He's charming as hell and absolutely hot. He's also a nerd, and we love nerds in this house.

Jacob Hackerman: That gay guy from LiS2 I know of because he's the gay guy you can't date. He's cute!

Mac: Is he a jealous pathetic fuck? Yes. That's my brand. Well I could do without the jealous part, but he's insecure. I can fix him. Or make him worse. He's an awful guy, but he's nothing compared to...

Mark Jefferson: Ooh boy. Yeah he's an evil guy, yeah he's probably terrible in bed and wouldn't shut up about art nouveau and whatnot, but I'm weak. I'm just a sl*t, folks.

Pike: It's the dad energy. He's Hopper but thinner (*sad*) but he still has that dad energy. I'm weak.

Ryan: THE MOMENT MY EYES FELL UPON HIM, I KNEW I HAD TO DATE HIM. Damn. Just. Damn. His role in the storyline is *chef's kiss*. He's also much more present that Steph imo, like Steph is "around you" and Ryan is "next to you" if you know what I mean? I dunno. Damn he's great. (ALSO THAT SCENE IN CHAPTER 2 IS BEAUTIFUL, COME ON)

Chloe's dad: He's a nice dad.

Justin Williams: He's just chilling, he's nice, that's a goal right there. 100% would date. He's so chill. Very lovable character. I can't do my loving of the character enough justice. He's chilling when everyone else is either hyper or an ass.

Esteban Diaz: Oh another dad! He seems nice. Hope nothing bad happens to him.

Joey Peterson: He's beautiful but he's also one of the few characters that really look dateable. He's husband material, not just f*ck buddy material. I've got a ring for you, sir.

Nathan Price: Listen we all know Nathan is awful and IRL I'd absolutely steer away from that kind of person, but it's a videogame and I can!!!! Fix him!!!!

The bouncer from BtS: Not only can he protect you with his muscles, but he's genuinely a fun guy from what little screentime he has. It helps that Chloe's backtalk mechanic is so silly it makes him immediately endearing.

Warren: Haters gonna hate but I actually decided to date him with Max in LiS1. Okay here's the thing: I feel like dating Chloe comes with a lot of baggage. She can be annoying as fuck at some points in the game, and I understand it, I really do, I see where she's coming from and I absolutely cried in the DLC of BtS, but she's still A LOT to deal with. Meanwhile Warren is just generally supportive of Max, even though she's kind of an ass to him lmao. The narrative pushes Chloe/Max as far more canon than Warren/Max, and the Warren/Max romance feels like their kiss in EP5 is just something Max does to make him happy in this apocalypse, even though she doesn't really love him. It's clear she doesn't have the same relationship with him as with Chloe. But in the end, I've fallen for the nerdy nice guy (and not "nice guy" like someone else in this list...)

The rest of them: Eww. Though I have to say I quite appreciate the theatre teacher. The play part in BtS felt awfully close to home, in both the best ways and the worst ways. I've rarely felt so conflicted on a piece of media hahahaha

[ben-the-hyena]

Don't forget they both want to shoe horn one of the halves of the main ships as absolutely "pure perfect and innocent who can do no wrong" while they absolutely are not and present them being harrassers as normal and justified because "sad and lonely :(" and the other halves are stalkers who ruin lives around them but forgiven and always in the right and "would feel so much nicer if they gahe a chance to their harrasser". Oh and also both creators insist they are deep and everything but they actually rely too much on status quo erasing good developments and coming up with forced plot points to give the illusion the shows are "advancing". And both block "haters" and unprofessionally go on long rants on Twitter. And they are publicly mad and openly show they contempt for shippers of non canon ships and fans of the characters they hate and when they see that character (Chloe and Stella) they hate are STILL loved and given nuance in fanwork they retcon them into being absolutely evil more and more stupidly worse than they ever were but assure and convince their diehard fans it was always planned and you're just mad your headcanon (and ships) isn't real

Vivziepop Is The Female Thomas Astruc

Seriously, these two have so much in common and it's obvious that Vivziepop has gone down the same road as him which is a creator who is overtly sensitive to criticism and reveals themselves to be an immature manchild who snipes back at critics in the worst way possible.

One big thing I noticed is they have hate sink characters who had great potential to be more interesting, but refused to do anything with them because they want to hammer in a theme with them some people are just plain bad but as a result they become really bland villains who come off as just causing misery for the sake of it.

Another thing I noticed both have had dip in qualities after their promising first season. They were given praise in their first season but fans noticed by second season the flaws of the shows, especially when it came to the romance and characterization. Plot premises are repeated to an obnoxious degree and characters get more and more flanderized to the point they almost seem a parody of their first season characterization.

Also the biggest thing that seems to really be an issue is the romance. With Ladybug, romance was always the focus but it's the fact that it strangles the plot makes it a problem. In Helluvaboss, it wasn't originally going to be about romance but just running a business to assassinating people in the living world. Never or less, both romances have shown to get more toxic as they strangle the show from being interesting or bringing any good characterization.

I also think the biggest things against these shows is the fact that they both feel like they have no direction due the poor writing qualities that their creators have. I also think it ties back to them not listening to anything that could improve themselves, but instead double down on trying to look right and as a result looking foolish for their efforts.

[imthepunchlord]

Thomas Astruc: we're scrapping Felix because he's not a good influence on little kids and we don't want them to think they should all have crushes on a guy like him. We're replacing him with Adrien, who's is PERFECT and FLAWLESS and if you think there's ANYTHING WRONG with him that needs to be addressed in the show you're a hater and I'm blocking you :/ (I mean... this is basically what happened right?)

Yeeep. I kinda think more and more that Fe was scrapped because he was very obviously flawed, and just, oh no, we can’t have a boy be so clearly flawed! This is supposed to be about girls and them being super flawed and only them needing to face consequences for their behaviors and mistakes. 

I will say and agree, that on the surface, Adrien is a better example for kids than Felix is, especially on who to have a crush on. Someone that is encouraging and supportive of you, readily acknowledges your capability and is a solid friend and partner to have in your life, romantic or platonic. 

Compared to Felix, who is cold, distances himself, can be mean when pushed to the limit, and has a motivation that sets him against LB, sparks a partnership that can make trust iffy; yeah, Adrien is a more solid example on the surface. 

But, go past that surface, well, then Adrien is less of a good role model. He does stuff that’s not encouraging and not a good example for kids. 

Copycat, his jealousy and pinning the blame on LB.

Glaciator, that unhealthy mindset that just because LB wasn’t clear in her no, that that means that yes, she could come to his date; and then gets upset at her when she doesn’t and she, who isn’t in the wrong, has to be the bigger person about it. 

Prime Queen, sparks an idea that they’ll date in the future while she’s clearly uncomfortable. And then repeatedly tries to kiss her when its clear that she’s not interested in it. 

Then a lot of the time just allowing Chloe to do what she wants, only really once stepping up about it and then just “lol, she’ll never change lets have fun with all the misery and hurt she causes, we can put up with it” and just… 

Adrien is flawed and isn’t perfect; but he is treated as such because these issues in him aren’t acknowledged nor do they work to fix them. Felix, who has clearer issues going on with him, if he did the same it’d be harder to ignore them or paint him as the one who should be in the right… though I suppose they could do the same as they do with Chloe, who has yet to really face up or apologize to what she’s done, and the few moments she moves forward are treated as big and celebratory.  

Anway! Yeah, I can see Felix being far more clearly flawed being the reason they got rid of him and replaced him with Adrien, who is easier to paint as a perfect character. On the surface, he is a better role model, but go deeper and there are issues of Adrien as a role model, with issues that can be easily overlooked since they don’t really want to point them out, like Copycat we were set up to feel bad for Adrien because LB didn’t see him romantically, despite the fact that he just lied to and about her. 

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Nancy

Rio: You know Rio: If you like, I could sleep with Mr. Tomlinson Rio: Take the heat and shine off you all in one, just ask Nancy: It's a kind offer Nancy: But it's not gonna fix any of the important stuff Nancy: And it's not like you deserve any of what would come from that unholy union Rio: Okay, you could give me names of the worst offenders and I'll sort them out Rio: not in similar fashion to teach, of course Rio: How are you really though, babe? Stupid question but gotta come Nancy: You can't take on half the school, Rio Nancy: If it was that easy I'd still be in London Nancy: Maybe it's a stupid question but I've only got an obvious answer so Rio: Sure I can Rio: Ain't my first rodeo Rio: Is there anything of actual use I can do to make everything not totally shit or? Nancy: Don't be nice to me Nancy: I can't handle it Nancy: And I just re-applied my make-up Rio: You ain't wronged me Rio: along with half the School, like but they LOVE taking shit personal when 10 minutes ago it was Quinn who? Rio: And we've all put our waterproof to the test before Nancy: If it was just her I wouldn't be thinking about leaving Nancy: Tristan literally has half the school on his side and it's not like I can blame him Rio: It's just insecurity Rio: 'cos you're not a total sadcase like the kids she usually works with, can't pick on them for loving on his Ma or swinging at her whatever Rio: he's just taking out his blatant issues about it 'cos he ain't had the chance before Nancy: Am I not? What would you call me? Nancy: Yeah, bit like how I was with his dad Nancy: At least he's got real issues, I've got...imaginary emotions? Or something Rio: Hmm Rio: I might throw hopeless romantic at you if I'm feeling really savage Rio: Nah, they ain't imaginary Rio: How much easier if they were Nancy: Hopeless is right Nancy: But I doubt either Sian or Quinn would call me romantic Nancy: Well, they weren't real. None of it was Rio: Not the fantasy in your head but the feelings were Rio: you can try and discredit them if it helps but in my experience, usually a pointless exercise Rio: but painful enough to feel somewhat fitting of a punishment, right? a start, at the very least Nancy: Ouch. Calling it a fantasy sounds....yeah let's not Nancy: I know you've got a point, that I should have let you make earlier Nancy: God, how did I let myself end up here Nancy: What the hell Rio: Sorry, as if the world wasn't ready to burst your bubble, like Rio: Shit happens Rio: You can't control it Rio: Arguably could've controlled it enough to not get to that point but I ain't got room or desire to judge too harshly Nancy: It's fine, I've heard worse from the world Nancy: I can though. I had been Nancy: Or so I thought Rio: 'Til you didn't Rio: exactly Rio: It's done now, the rumour mill will do it's thing, then you'll be free to deal with the actual mess in your head Nancy: It's his fault Nancy: The prick Nancy: I wouldn't have lost control if he didn't first Rio: Yeah Rio: She sounds devious Rio: Why her, like Nancy: He hates me and so does she Nancy: Match made, like Rio: He doesn't hate you, babe Rio: He's just an idiot Nancy: Okay, he hasn't forgiven me then Nancy: Point is, he's mad at me Rio: At least you've got reason to be mad at him now too, yeah? Rio: Fair fight Nancy: Like I need a reason, he didn't have one Rio: Yeah, not how he sees it though Rio: maybe you can get it all out there now Nancy: He sees things to suit him Nancy: Always has Nancy: Everything about her was right there for him to see before I left and after Rio: Yeah, it's fucked up Nancy: I shouldn't have to spell it out to him, he was right there Rio: I know Rio: I don't think it's like that Rio: like it's still shitty Rio: but it's not like, love Rio: he ain't like that, if nothing else, thank fuck, yeah Nancy: It doesn't make me feel any better Nancy: There's always girls around him, he didn't need to get with her Nancy: All their friends remember, they tagged me, so he can't have forgotten what she's like and everything she did Rio: He looked wasted Rio: in her photos Nancy: Lesbian or not, I know if he was that wasted he wouldn't have been able to get it up for her Nancy: It's not an excuse Rio: Let's not think about the logisitics Rio: it's not personal, physical reactions Nancy: You can say that, it doesn't matter to you Nancy: If he's so mad at me for moving to Dublin he shouldn't sleep with one of the main reasons why I had to Rio: Have you said this to him yet? Nancy: Fuck no Nancy: And I'm not going to Nancy: He knows what she did, he didn't stop it, whatever I didn't ask him to, but he still had a front row seat Nancy: She made sure everyone did Rio: Wouldn't it make you feel better, to rip him a new one? Nancy: Not really Nancy: I've tried enough times before Nancy: And she's the least of my worries now that half this school hates me and the other half loves me in a way I don't want, ever Rio: I can hear the threesome offers from here Rio: Ugh Nancy: Like, I get it, I'm a cliche, let me list the ways for you but then go away Rio: Keeps your inbox fun and fresh, I guess? Rio: Is it gonna be hate or love, know the feeling Nancy: I haven't even asked how you are! Nancy: Letting myself down in all the ways Rio: Oh God, same old, same old, no need to depress yourself further Nancy: Not to be like my brother and his (lack of) coping mechanisms yet again, but can we go out? Nancy: I'm over being staring at my walls or my phone crying or trying not to Rio: 'Course Rio: you're allowed to drown your sorrows at least 3 more times 'fore I'm calling you out on the parallels Rio: Anywhere with cheap drinks and GRL POWER bops? Nancy: Anywhere that my haters won't be Nancy: Because now I've called them haters which is the WORST thing Rio: 😂 Rio: May as well call 'em motivators whilst you're at it and be done with it Nancy: Sounded like a soundbite from my mum's mouth Nancy: That's the last straw. I wanna die Rio: Not before you've got a 'round in Nancy: If you come and help me not look how I feel then I'll owe you so many drinks Nancy: You'll be able to get as drunk as Buster, fuck everything up too Rio: I do owe you for the time I shamelessly stole your wardrobe so Nancy: You're literally trying to remind me and I still don't remember Nancy: So you're fine Rio: Still omw Rio: I've rocked many a makeover in my time, though it's been a while since any of 'em but Grace would let me 😂 Nancy: I have no energy to fight you Nancy: And can't look worse than I do right now Nancy: The bar is low low low Rio: Slap some cucumbers on those puffy eyes Nancy: Excuse me mum I need to take those from your water really quick, babe Nancy: 👌 Rio: When plain old water just ain't hydrating enough Nancy: @ my dehydrated but still crying self Rio: Dry it up, babe Rio: Gotta at least arrive at the club semi put together Nancy: Are they gonna let me in? Nancy: I can't do any more humiliation today Rio: Of course, you're nearly 18 anyway Rio: they let Indie in, you're fine Nancy: Tell it to Sian Nancy: And the powers that be so they don't sack her Rio: 😑 Nancy: If we're going out you need to work on your poker face Rio: I'm sorry but I'm not gonna cry for her, babe Nancy: You sound like the rumor mill Nancy: none of this is her fault Rio: Mm, she could've done more about it Nancy: She didn't know about it, what could she do? Rio: You reckon? Rio: She's a married woman and you probably weren't that subtle Nancy: You're talking to me not my brother Nancy: I can be subtle Nancy: I've had years of practice Rio: Not with love and shit Rio: No offence but you know it's true Nancy: Yes with love and shit Nancy: She didn't know until I wanted her to Rio: Okay Nancy: You don't believe me, do you? Rio: No but there's no need to push the issue Rio: you can't know either way now Rio: but they won't sack her Nancy: You should Nancy: You say I can't, but I do know, 'cause I've been over every moment in my head Nancy: I wish she did know, before, and she felt the same as I do but that's not gonna happen Rio: Yeah, and every time you go over it, the memory changes Rio: Sorry but you're not a trusted source on this Rio: especially 'cos you still wish that Nancy: I know Nancy: I can't just stop loving her Nancy: Everyone wants me to, even her, but I don't know how to Rio: Yeah Rio: Time, that's about all that'll do it Rio: or someone else Nancy: Did time work for you? 'Cause been there tried the second option already Rio: 'Course Rio: heals all wounds don't you know Nancy: I can't say I do know that yet Nancy: I'm still angry and hurt about Chloe and Buster so Rio: That's allowed Rio: got a decent amount of time left on both before people are eye-rolling Nancy: You think? It's been years since I left Nancy: I should be over it Rio: Nah Rio: she's still the same bitch Rio: why should you try and be above it Nancy: 'Cause I came here to change Nancy: So I shouldn't be the same bitch Nancy: It's pathetic, right? Rio: No, 'cos you weren't the bitch to begin with Rio: You don't need to change Nancy: if the alternative is this Nancy: i want to Nancy: I hate this Rio: Okay Rio: How do you wanna be? Rio: Let's make it happen Nancy: where to start, like Rio: You tell me, babe Nancy: My extensive wardrobe doesn't include a chastity belt so I'm gonna need more self control Nancy: Any ideas? Nancy: Not an app for building that as far as I know Rio: Hmm, idk Rio: could get yourself on tinder, the awfulness of people looking for a quick hookup will do wonders for your sex drive Nancy: Lord Nancy: That's a scarily good idea Nancy: Anywhere where straight guys exist in numbers Rio: The club will be the IRL embodiment so tonight is your lucky night Nancy: Luck isn't on my side lately but i've got nothing to lose Rio: That's the spirit Rio: Might as well put all your chips down now Nancy: Keep my phone for me later? Drunk dialing Quinn at the end isn't gonna work out the way it did at the start Rio: Not yet anyway Rio: Time, yeah? Rio: You take mine, swapsies Nancy: Likely not ever Nancy: You didn't see her Nancy: But sure, your phone camera gets me Rio: Never say never Rio: unless it's your married teacher Nancy: Don't give me undeserved hope Rio: I dunno Rio: It's not like you were married, you know Rio: or you properly cheated Nancy: Yeah but that's only because I didn't have the chance Nancy: I was still thinking about Sian most of the time Nancy: That's gotta hurt Rio: Bit insulting, yeah Rio: I wouldn't go back but maybe she liked you Rio: Either way, don't think there's anything you can do to make ammends rn so Nancy: She told me she liked me Nancy: And because I'm the worst human I didn't stop it Rio: Hardly Nancy: You're too nice to kick me when I'm down Rio: I ain't Rio: And I ain't above using someone for my own shit, not many are Nancy: I'm just as bad as him Nancy: Fucking twinning Rio: Different sins Rio: If you're gonna make like him, try not to give a shit about it, right? Take the perks with it Nancy: If only Nancy: At least he didn't like Chloe and use her anyway Nancy: That's just me and what I'm looking for in a girlfriend Rio: Oh, babe Rio: what a mess Nancy: Help me Nancy: Should I just go back to London or? Rio: Hmm, I don't know Rio: It'd maybe hurt less to not see either of them Rio: but you'd be more alone Rio: but, either way, it's a year and you're out of both Nancy: I don't know either Nancy: I wanna see them both so much and that's why I shouldn't be near either of them, right? Nancy: But June will murder me if I leave and I'll murder Buster if I have to share a house with him all the time again Nancy: Summer was Nancy: Oh God Rio: You're not a monster, you're allowed to feel that Rio: You aren't going to do anything else, the mistakes have been made, you're on learning time Rio: I can't really see London working, to be honest Rio: It'd be a step back, more than all...this Nancy: Yeah. I don't love it there. Closer to being at home here by far Nancy: I know I'm just scared to stay Nancy: But I need to girl up and stick it out, like Rio: Yeah Rio: We're all here Rio: that's a good % of the school pop so fuck it Nancy: 😂 real Nancy: be on your way faster 'cause whatever is closest or coldest in this fridge is being opened now Rio: 👍 Rio: Had to sort my own self but I'm in my car Rio: not looking a total state now, welcome Nancy: teach me how to make cocktails so I can make new friends? Rio: Ooh Rio: Fun Rio: Grandad gonna be pissed off but deal, old man Nancy: sorry but I need the gays to protect me now, granddad I can't wait for you to come over and be fabulous Rio: I'll invite some of my gay friends if you want Rio: not a hoe you out vibe Nancy: They'll back right off when they sense my 💔 so bring whoever you want Rio: See who's about and up for it Rio: first though, some tlc Nancy: If you bring a boy you like I'll promise not to gag Nancy: Or cry Rio: Trust, there are no boys making me gag or cry atm Nancy: Gross Rio: 😂 Nancy: And I assume disappointing? 🤔 Is that the goal, penis so big it almost kills you or? Rio: Oh honey 😏 Rio: I don't believe for a sec you're so 💔 that you're ready for the lowdown on the d Nancy: Trying to talk about you and your interests since I haven't shut up about me Rio: Sweet Rio: Maybe when I'm drunker myself I'll tell you all about it Nancy: Yeah? Nancy: So there's stuff to tell Nancy: Knew it Rio: Nahhhhhhh Rio: Not my own personal penis Rio: just the basics Nancy: Like basic teenage boys from your street or Ann Summer's basic range? Nancy: Either way, do better if I have to live through you Rio: Damn Rio: Pressure weren't real enough already, like 😜 Rio: Ma like, where's those grandkids @ Nancy: Like she wouldn't come at me with the same question Rio: We're all slacking Rio: for shame Nancy: Wait until she hears about my celibacy Nancy: Sorry auntie Nancy: I gotta do what I gotta do Rio: 'til you 👀 some cuties in the cloob Nancy: I'm giving myself to god Nancy: she's a babe Nancy: full nun mode activated Rio: You talking about Ariana Grande? Nancy: Never Nancy: I've got enough drama in my life without fancying a straight celeb Rio: Celebs don't count Rio: ask anyone, free pass, like Rio: off chance she's out in dubo tonight Nancy: It's 🌈 icons or nothing Nancy: But it's nothing, obviously Nancy: feel free to hit her up yourself though Rio: Picky Rio: I'm good tho, not really my type either Nancy: I could make a bunny joke but we don't need to get back into the Ann Summer's shelves Rio: Don't we? Rio: Celibacy ain't gon' be easy babe Nancy: I've done it before Nancy: First girlfriend, remember Rio: Pringle rules Nancy: Never say that again Nancy: Touches too much of a nerve, which in itself sounds dirty so Rio: 😂 Nancy: Don't laugh at me Nancy: Why did I have to ruin my life? Nancy: 😭 Rio: You had to know, yeah? Nancy: But I should've known anyway Rio: You'd always have a what if Nancy: Yeah but I've just swapped one for another 'cause now Quinn's a what if instead Rio: She's a has been now Rio: in the nicest possible way Nancy: Ouch Rio: Not a never ever though Nancy: Safe to assume Nancy: I wouldn't have me back Rio: Yeah but you're living up to your name rep rn Nancy: ? Rio: A negative Nancy Rio: sure that's not old Nancy: I was going on the McKenna part and I was like, how insulting is this gonna get? Rio: Too real for tonight Nancy: Too real for this month Rio: I'll allow it Nancy: Oh god, I'm gonna have to change all my birthday plans Nancy: Don't let me think about that Rio: Yeah, don't Rio: we'll sort something Rio: but I'm here Rio: pour me a drink and lemme in Nancy: 👌👌 Nancy: Excuse mum and dad's scowls Rio: 😬 Rio: Should I move my car lads Nancy: Back to the 24 and away from my bad influence I'm sure they'd say right now Nancy: not a direct quote Rio: I'll chat 'em round Rio: parents love me Nancy: 😏 Rio: Rude! Nancy: Hey, I'm preparing you for the kind of quality banter you'll have to get used to hearing if you hang around me Rio: Alright, the craic starts here Rio: deal with it, 'rents Nancy: 💚🍀

[wesonerdy]

Zoey is all about romance in this week’s grown-ish, but her player-antics might blow up in her face. Full recap of “If You’re Reading This, It’s Too Late” by @luvthispayne.

Courtesy of Freeform/Byron Cohen

  We are back y’all! I’ve been waiting for this all week and this week’s episode did not disappoint. Let’s just get straight to it.

Last week we left off with Zoey getting a “u up” text from BaeRon (pronounce this as Bae-ryyyyyyynnnnnnn in Teyanna Taylor’s voice) Zoey promptly, like damn girl can you even wait 5 minutes, responded yeah. Well since that night, Sis has gotten at least two other “u up” texts from Aaron and her first kiss. Wait. Her. First. Kiss. Awwwww, all the damn feels. Buuuuut her first kiss and she’s in love. I canna. If the first kiss has her in love, lawd don’t let her get the …… *loses signal*

Image Source: Tenor.com

  So about these “u up” texts, Zoey is all kinds of confused. The first couple of times she got them, she responded and it led to her and Aaron fooling around. We don’t really know what fooling around means, other than maybe some kissing and heavy petting as the old folks would say. I am really showing my age with that one lol SHUT UP!!! GET OFF MY LAWN!

Zoey needs some help sorting out how to feel so she calls a girls gathering in the middle of the night but the opinions are about as mixed and varied as a bag of trailmix. One the one hand, the twins believe that if Zoey responds to yet another “u up” text from Aaron that it basically insinuates that she’s a hoe and DTF (if you don’t know what that stands for, google it. I won’t do everything for you). I mean it is 2:30am.

  Then you have Nomi (thank God for Nomi), who assures her that if she responds its because she wants to. And there is nothing wrong with a booty call, especially if y’all both want the booty. Nomi tries to explain that there is nothing wrong with a young woman exploring her sexuality and having the desire same as a man. Okay. GIRL!

  Then there’s Ana who simplistically believes that the texts are just because he’s thinking about her, and that’s why Aaron is texting her at 2:30am. I would think her naivete was cute if she wasn’t doling out terrible ass advice.

Courtesy of Freeform/Byron Cohen

  Did someone say terrible advice, the entire discussion of the texts brings up another problem. Zoey doesn’t exactly know what hooking up means. She mentions that she responds to the text because she just wants to hookup with Aaron. She thinks hooking up means just hanging out. Look I ain’t that old but even I know hooking up has always meant two bodies doing the vertical tango. Zoey’s not the only one who doesn’t know what it means because Ana volunteers that she hooked up with her Uncle just last night at his hotel and it didn’t include anything sexual. Someone please call Child Protective Services.

  Ultimately, Zoey decides to play the long game and figures that not responding to Aaron’s text at all might just work in her favor because she’ll make him wait. Let’s just go ahead and crown Zoey #MissTeamBadDecisions2018 of Cal U because I swear it’s been one dumb decision after another. But thats college I guess.

The next day Zoey has blown Aaron off but she has to see him in class because they sit right next to each other. In class and Sis is giving him the cold shoulder and at first it seems to be working because he is laying on compliments HEAVY! I’m all cheering like okay girl, you got him right where you want him. But as soon as Zoey starts to feel her little self, Aaron leaves class early with a new bae of his own. We don’t know his other chick is but Zoey is seething with envy and hateration and holleration in the dancery.

  Girl that’s what happens when you out here playing more games than Jigsaw. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Zoey needs a new plan to get Aaron back and lord I wished her friends or at least her roommate was around before she launched her plan. Sis texts Aaron and when he doesn’t respond immediately she goes into text diarrhea. Send HALP! Sis is spiraling out of control and I am HOLLERING IN MY HOUSE, OH GOD STOP!

  Zoey starts texting everything from songs to asking for joint checking accounts and baby names. I mean, all she didn’t send was a Marvin’s Room, I’m just saying you can do better text. My god, I cringed thinking about just how many texts she sent and how embarrassingly awful they all were. What’s worse is that Aaron’s response was literally “Please stop.”

At this point, death really is her only option because I mean she looks NUTS. Like certified nuts. If I was Aaron, I’d be considering a restraining order. Given her humiliation, Zoey feels that the most logical way to get over one man is to get under another. Makes perfect sense.

  Who’s the new bae, Luca! Yes, the WEEKDAY is about to be her new 9-5 and Weekend. Now I genuinely can’t tell if Zoey is truly feeling Luca, which it seems like she is, or if she’s just spending time with him to occupy herself and make Aaron jealous. If it’s the first, then obviously, I am pro-Zoey, girl get your Luca on. If it is the latter, then girl DO BETTER!

My gut tells me its the latter because no long after she and Luca start getting cozy, Aaron pops back into her life and now she’s balancing two BAES! This doesn’t seem like it’s going to work out in her favor because let’s be real we’ve seen Zoey’s multi-tasking skills and they suck. Last time she tried juggling things she ended up mildly addicted to adderall.

For a minute things seem to be going well. I mean she’s keeping her calendar tight, avoiding pics with them both, and geo-tagging locations so there are no run ins. Sidenote: the fact that this geotagging is a thing is scary as all hell and millennials frighten me. Also just binged black mirror so lowkey all technology frightens me.

But back to Zoey, there’s only so long Sis can try and keep both balls in the air before they come crashing down on her head. Crash and burn. Now y’all know that Luca and Aaron been arguing since day ONE in Dr. Telphy class. Not only is oey balancing two men but she’s doing so with two men who cannot STAND EACH OTHER. This is messy and I love it.

  Zoey gets caught facetiming Aaron while on skype with Luca. They see each other and it’s an immediate roast fest. Aaron said that Luca looked like Willow Smith and I am pretty sure that my ghost is writing this recap because last night I died. Total help me sing. Anyway, the biggest loser in all of this ends up being Zoey because both the guys find out about each other and both want nothing to do with her. Yeah well she earned it. Now Zoey’s a ball of confused mess. While sulking we meet another character, Dean Parker.

Courtesy of Freeform/Craig Sjodin

Courtesy of Freeform/Byron Cohen

  Dean Parker takes the time to give his troubled student a few pearls of wisdom about relationships; mainly about communication and honesty. After their chat, Zoey is feeling better about how to move forward and vows that she’ll be more honest with herself those she’s dating. More importantly, she resolves that she is going to try and focus more on why she’s college in the first place; her education. I am beaming with pride. The baby is growing up and learning life lessons and look at her.

  It doesn’t last long because like 8 hours later, she meets a new guy named Cash, and got damnit if we ain’t right back where we started. Is Cash just going to be another ploy in her plot to woo Aaron, chile probably. Hey, Cash boo though. He’s a chocolate cutie.

Courtesy of Freeform/Byron Cohen

  Will our girl end up with more egg on her face? I seriously hope not because I really want #MissBadTeamBadDecisions2018 to give her crown to someone else. But we’ll just have to wait until next week to see what happens! See you then.

    Ashley is a lawyer by day and a television, social media enthusiast by night. Catch her on twitter spreading black girl magic. Twitter: @luvthispayne RECAP: ‘grown-ish’ Season 1, Episode 3 “If You’re Reading This, It’s Too Late” Zoey is all about romance in this week's grown-ish, but her player-antics might blow up in her face.

[tangent101]

Let us pretend for a moment that much like the Bros would have preferred, Life is Strange had been about two teenage males, Cole and Maxwell. We would not have heard any complaints about Cole's actions, especially after it got out that David was smacking Cole around. There would be outrage at David escalating that quickly. But because we had Chloe (and Max) we saw tremendous hatred that this "uppity" female had dared to stand up to David... and then as more and more evidence mounts for his being an abusive piece of shit, the Chloe-Haters would then use Max as a new excuse to hate Chloe (despite the fact they also hated Max).

Am I saying that misogyny among the people hating Chloe is responsible for the outcry against Chloe? For the vast majority of them, yes, I am. If someone reading this who dislikes Chloe feels the need to speak up against this, ask yourself why? Because I gave an out. I said vast majority, not all. So then... why get upset when you could very well be the exception to the rule? Why step up and insist I'm wrong (outside of the fact I'm a woman)?

David is no hero. He is not misunderstood. He is an abusive man who is in a position of power over a number of women including Chloe and we see multiple instances of his using his power over women starting with Max herself. Seriously, a girl comes out of the bathroom and he demands to know what she was doing in there? Class had let out and it's a central bathroom. (Hell, it is a fucking stupid place for Chloe and Nathan to meet, any of the female characters could have walked in there to use the bathroom, including Mrs. Grant, who would have not taken kindly to Nathan being in the women's bathroom and who knew Chloe didn't attend Blackwell anymore.)

Not only does David harass Max for legitimately coming out of a bathroom, he is seen an hour later harassing Kate Marsh. Kate is one of the more upstanding students at Blackwell. Yet David turns on this girl immediately, accusing her of dealing drugs. A known drug dealer is parked at the campus parking lot, but David is chasing after Kate rather than keeping an eye on Frank. Why? Because Frank is a tall scary man, and Kate is smaller than him and easily bullied.

Oh, and David, a man with military training, can't even clear a room properly. What happened, David, did you flunk out of basic training? This wannabe hero abuses women, ignores the known drug dealer when he's on campus, and only saves Max by blindly blundering into a dangerous situation, gun out, unable to stop a scrawny teacher from ambushing him and taking him out without a bound captive girl you're trying to save distracting that teacher. How many times does Max save David's ass from Jefferson? (Ignoring the Rewinds, twice that David is aware of.)

Also, after taking Jefferson out, does he go outside to contact the police? No. He starts nosing through evidence, despite not being a cop or having the knowledge of how to secure a crime scene, and contaminates evidence. For someone who wanted to be a police officer and who is ex-military, David is truly pathetic. How he was not allowed into the corrupt ABPD I have no idea, he'd fit right in.

Chloe „guilt tripping” Max

Chloe is accused of “guilt tripping” Max to do her bidding. The prime example of that is supposed to be when she tells David that her joint belongs to Max, expecting Max to go along with the lie, because Max “owes her” for abandoning her for five years.

I disagree with the above interpretation of the joint incident. I think it stems from some players not listening to what Max actually says. It’s true that Max feels guilty if she has witnessed Chloe being hit and insulted by David. But why exactly does she feel guilty?

Max explicitly says, wondering if she should rewind time, “David was such a mean bastard to Chloe ... What if I had stepped up to help?”. She doesn’t say “I should’ve bitten the bullet for Chloe because I owe her”. Max doesn’t feel guilty that she has some unpaid debt towards Chloe. She feels guilty, because she’s seen someone get hurt and she could take that hurt away, by putting herself at risk.

We feel compelled to protect our friends not because we owe them. We feel compelled to protect our friends because we care about them. If you feel compelled to help someone only if you owe them, you are not their friend. Friendship isn’t transactional in nature. Max doesn’t owe Chloe to go along with her lie. The same way she doesn’t owe Kate getting into a screaming match with a campus security officer. But Max doesn’t help others because she owes them. She helps others, because she can’t stand seeing them get hurt.

I can't see Chloe blaming her weed on Max as the work of some manipulative mastermind. I see it as something that a terrified, abused girl might do to not get hurt.

Chloe lies about the weed because she’s scared of David hitting her. It’s almost certain that he hit her previously. Notice that during the arguement in Episode 3 David briefly raises his hand towards Chloe, to which she reacts with a scared face – this happens even if David didn’t hit her in Episode 1. David’s gesture would not scare her if he didn’t hit her before. And if Max stays in the closet, Chloe says to David: "Don't touch me again asshole. That's the last time", which also implies that it happened before.

I also think that it's unfair to use a single interaction between Max and Chloe which takes place early in the game to make sweeping statements about Chloe's character and her attitude towards Max. Focusing on this one incident completely ignores Chloe's character development. Just like Max, she finds her courage and is willing to risk her life to protect her friend. In Episode 4, when Nathan catches Max in the boys' dorms, Chloe shields Max with her own body and pushes Nathan away, despite knowing that Nathan is armed and almost shot her just three days prior. When Nathan shows up, Chloe's facial expression is one of fear, but the moment he starts walking towards Max, she steps in.

There are other problems with the "guilt tripping" accusation. It rests on the assumption that Chloe bringing up Max’s five year absence is somehow wrong. I think it would be incredibly weird if Chloe didn’t address that elephant in the room in some way.

When friends feel betrayed or disappointed, the most healthy course of action is to talk things through. If you never discuss difficult things with someone, they are not your friend. An acquaintance perhaps, but not a friend. If you don't talk about difficult things with other people, that means you do not trust them and don’t feel comfortable with them. Imagine that instead of telling Max that she felt abandoned (and promptly welcoming her back home), Chloe would pretend that her father’s funeral was yesterday and that she and Max were never separated. That would completely poison the atmosphere between them. Max would constantly be expecting that conversation to come, only it never would. It would hang over them like a dark cloud.

Another problem is that this accusation ignores the fact that Chloe lies about the joint’s ownership only if Max fails to hide in the closet. If she wanted to use Max as a scapegoat, why would she tell her to hide? And allow her to stay hidden after David asked her about the weed? If Max stays in the closet the entire time, she says "I'm sorry" after David walks out. To which Chloe replies: "For what? He would've been a bigger dick if he caught you in here". In the version of events in which Max gets to the closet on time, Chloe does not expect Max to leave the closet and take the blame. So she doesn't think Max "owes" her that. She's super surprised if Max does come out of the closet. Which is why this is the only version of the weed incident in which Chloe lets Max in on her revolver secret.

As an aside note, the words David says to Chloe are just as awful as the slap itself. There are several versions of his angry tirade. The worst comes if Max didn't argue with him at Blackwell. He says that Max should stay away from Chloe for her own good, because Chloe will only drag her down. Can you imagine hearing your own parent talk about you like that? Hearing things like that from your own parent is crushing. When Max says that David was “a mean bastard”, I think she meant not only the slap, but also how he made Chloe feel worthless. Which is the opposite of how parents should make their children feel.