#OH I LIED. i have died in other ways. specifically by misjudging how FAR the dodge roll takes u

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I refuse to be one of your regrets

They were playing back to back, each of them with a headset on but facing away from each other. When their screens were side-by-side it was too easy to get distracted. Like this, they could still be close without compromising their skills.

Bibi’s mic was muted, as it usually was when they were in played competitions. For some unfathomable reason, despite the fact that she was one of the top rated players globally, when most people heard her speak over voice chat they had a hard time listening to her.

Greyson thought excluding people based on their gender was stupid, but he didn’t care enough to argue with every moron they ended up on team with. Instead, Bibi muted her mic, and Greyson relayed what she had to say in her place. It was a bit complicated, but they were the highest rated tank/healer duo and people put up with a surprising amount of shit to keep them from changing teams.

They hadn’t lost a single match since starting, despite the fact that neither of them had gotten much sleep. Bibi didn’t sleep well on planes, and when she didn’t sleep Greyson didn’t either. Their current match was going so well that they had left the dps to camp the payload while the two of them camped the respawn point. Or rather, Bibi decided to camp the respawn point to terrorize the other team and Greyson had pretended it was a legitimate strategy and gotten the team organized.

Subtle, his murder girlfriend was not.

Sighing, she tipped her head back against his, while they both listened to their teammates argue about which kebab shop in a specific neighborhood was better. Normally Greyson would have muted his mic and talked with Bibi, considering it looked like the game was basically over unless somehow one of the two of them were knocked off the spawn point. But when they played tournaments they spoke English, and Bibi liked to listen in for practice.

English was her fourth language, and despite Greyson’s offer to help her with it, she was dead set on figuring it out on her own. Even though she didn’t speak most of the time, she had to understand the instructions from the other players without the lag of Greyson translating for her. Difficult, but other than a rare mistranslation, she was doing fine.

The argument about the kebabs had devolved into petty insults that made Bibi giggle. Learning creative insults was one of her favorite things. He pulled one earphone off and heard her repeating some of the more interesting phrases under her breath. Her accent was a mix of Korean and French. George couldn’t stand it which made Greyson love it all the more. It was less intense when his brother wasn’t around to be annoying when she wanted to she could amp it up on purpose to get under his skin.

Bibi let out a sudden battle cry that made Greyson thankful her mic was still muted because it would have hurt before her character charged forward at full speed, knocking three (3) enemy players off the edge of the map in one go. Her gleeful cackle nearly drowned out the sound of one of their dps calling for them to return to the payload, and Greyson had little warning before Bibi charged him and began pushing his character towards the center of the map.

When the match ended officially, and Bibi once again celebrated getting player of the game, Greyson pulled them out of the queue and made the executive decision they were going to get some rest before they continued qualifying. However, his proposition of sleep and food had not gone down well with a certain party.

Bibi was not sleeping.

She was being quiet about it, head tucked against his chest like she usually did when they slept together. She wasn’t squirming around or making lots of noise. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t awake, it just meant she was a good faker. If there was one thing he had learned, it was that Bibi was very good at faking it.

Greyson was not, by any stretch of the imagination, a soft person. Not physically, not emotionally, not morally. Everyone knew this, including him. It wasn’t like he tried to hide it. So why, then, Bibi insisted on using him as a pillow he did not understand.

Not that he minded in the slightest when his girlfriend treated him like a glorified teddy bear. Hell, he didn’t even mind after she left and George drummed up the spine to tease him about it. If it made his Bibi happy, he was willing to do just about anything.

This policy did not happen to extend to letting her exhaust herself for no reason.

“We agreed on sleep first,” he told her, still using English rather than their usual French.

“Did not,” Bibi replied immediately. “I need food.”

“You need sleep,” Greyson countered gently.

“I will become hangry Bibi.” Hangry was a word Sam had taught her. Greyson didn’t know when she had spoken to Sam, or even how Sam knew what hangry was, but it was definitely his fault. “I like food,” Bibi continued, interrupting herself with a yawn. “I want take away food. Not Elenore’s.”

“We can order food,” Greyson agreed amiably. “After you get some sleep.”

“I don’t want sleep,” Bibi argued petulantly. “I want to eat hamberger.”

“Hamburger,” he corrected.

“Hemburger,” she repeated distractedly, and Greyson saw her wiggling her fingers in an imitation of the way she danced them across her keyboard when getting impatient. Playing asleep for so long had clearly left her with an excess of energy.

“Ham. Burger.”

“’amburgah,” she said firmly, in an accurate mockery of George’s posh accent.

“Now you’re just doing it on purpose,” Greyson complained, despite his mouth being turned up in a grin.

“Hambargar!” she declared loudly, causing him to jump slightly and sending her into a fit of giggles. Greyson tried shushing her but it didn’t work. The lack of sleep fueled her giggling fit until she started coughing, and Greyson had to retrieve a bottle of water for her.

“Why do they call it hamberger?” she asked him once she had calmed herself down. “It is not made of ham.”

“No, hamburgers are made of beef.” If it had been anyone else, the inane conversation would have driven him to leave the room. Bibi spoke about random things to test her understanding of the language, and also because she liked to see how far she could push Greyson before he swore.

Cheeky little giggler.

“Beef,” Bibi repeated. “Beef is not an animal.”

“Beef is the meat of an animal.”

“Beef comes from moos, yes?”

“Moose?” Greyson raised an eyebrow, but Bibi couldn’t see him with the lights out. Her eyes never really adjusted to the dark. Not like his. “No, beef does not come from moose.”

“Not a moose.” She elbowed him gently. “It goes moooooo. I don’t remember the name.”

“Cow?” he offered, but he felt her shake her head.

“Not cow.” She made an annoyed sound. “It was a long one.”

“A long cow?” Greyson couldn’t keep the grin off his face. He figured at the very least that getting to the end of her thoughts would get them closer to napping than letting her lay there and stew in it.

Bibi bolted upright suddenly, startling him. “Caddle!” she declared proudly.

“Cattle,” Greyson repeated. “Yes, that’s another word for cow.”

“Caddle.” She didn’t bother changing her pronunciation in the slightest, and ignored Greyson’s persistent hands that tried to get her to lie back down. “Why not call it after them?”

“Because beefburger doesn’t sound as good,” Greyson told her, and Bibi finally laid back down next to him.

“Cowburger?” she mused, and Greyson could barely make out her scrunching her nose.

“Still not as good,” Greyson lamented.

“Just burger would have worked.” Bibi yawned again, and nestled back into the nest of blankets they’d pulled together. “Don’t have to bring the other into it.”

“The other what?”

“Meat.” Bibi poked at Greyson’s chin until he reached up and trapped her hand in one of his. “They called it after the ham but it’s not a ham.”

“Ham comes from pigs.”

“Pig?”

“You know.” Greyson wiggled a bit to get more comfortable. “Like George.”

“That’s offensive to piggy,” Bibi admonished. “George is a little shit.”

Greyson couldn’t keep from laughing at that. “Yeah, but he’s my little shit.”

“Sucks to be you,” Bibi told him with a sincerity that made him laugh again.

“I don’t know about that,” he mused. “I’ve got you.”

“I’m Bibi,” she said as though she were introducing herself.

Greyson reached up to pat her on the head, but misjudged and patted her face instead. Bibi stuck her tongue out in retaliation and licked him.

“Gross.”

“You taste bad,” she told him seriously.

“Shh.” Greyson rolled over, pulling her more firmly against him. “Sleep. Then bergers.”

Bibi snorted. “You said berger.”

lies down and dies GUYS PLEASE-

L-LOOK AT MY OTP PLEASE GOD……………………………….

BIBI IS SUCH A DORK AND GREYSON IS SO SOFT LOOK AT HIM HE LOVES HER SO MUCH I’M GONNA DIE

kdjfhkjds this random discussion and jumpiness is so perfectly tiredness oh my god WHY IS EVERYTHING SO PERFECT THE WAY HE MAKES SURE SHE GETS SOME SLEEP AND HUMOURS HER UNTIL SHE GETS TIRED AND OH MY GOD SHE CALLS COWS MOOS THAT’S THE PUREST THING IN THE WORLD I LOVE EVERYTHING I LOVE BIBI I LOVE THEM I LOVE YOU SWEET WAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

I’VE ALREADY READ THIS LIKE 7 TIMES AND I CAN’T STOP READING IT IT’S SO GOOD IT’S SO GOOOODDDDDD