#Now I want to drink it >_< but I'm out of coconut milk :(

[hermitsdump]

So I have this spreadsheet of scents that I would use to make candles that smell like different characters, right

But it's hard to decide on a vessel for some of them

Anyway I went back to the candle shop today and a good bit of them were cycled out for other scents (maybe Choso will get his next year)

So I wanted to use the seasonal scents while they're here, yk

And I came out with one inspired by Sukuna's milk

[bigification]

Star Of The Show

"Is that really safe?" A snobbish man in an expensive suit snarled.

"Yes Mr. Derry, how many times do I have to tell you. It'll make you into a prime bodybuilder just like you asked." The technician sighed.

"It better be, because I am an important stake holder in this bodybuilding competition and I paid a lot for this." Mr. Derry continued to whine, despite receiving exactly what he asked for.

"Here I brought your coffee, sir." Mr. Derry's assistant sheepishly held out a Starbucks coffee. He grumbled as he read the long list of modifications he needed in his coffee to drink it.

"This has coconut milk you idiot!" He shoved the coffee back into his assistant, sending the scrawny man stumbling back. In an attempt to regain his balance he flailed his arm into the large machine that sat nearby.

"I... I'm sorry sir." The assistant panicked. "I can fix it." He reached for the machine in an attempt to minimize the blowback from his boss. He tried to move the machine back to its original position.

"Wait no! Don't tou-" the technician was interrupted.

A blinding light erupted across the back stage as a concentrated beam shot into the assistants chest. He looked like a ragdoll being tossed across the room, slamming into the wall. No one even noticed what had happened while they tried to recover from the flash.

The assistant slowly got up, his head was spinning. He assumed it was from the crash into the wall, but it only got worse after he got up. A burning heat boiled inside his chest as he attempted to recover. The burning soon turned to a tightness as his chest began to grow. His flat chest started to rise like a loaf of bread in the oven. His preppy button up strained under the pressure of his thickening pecs until the buttons started to pop off. His shirt burst open, revealing the perfectly formed pecs of a bodybuilder that created a shelf over his stomach. Speaking of which, his stomach began to melt away. His now flat stomach quickly rose back up, but with hard muscles this time. His stomach started to round out into a small muscle gut as six distinct muscles formed over it, causing the rest of his buttons to pop off in the process.

The technician and Mr. Derry were starting to recover from the flash, hearing increasingly loud footsteps rumbled from across the room and ever deeper sounding grunts and moans came from the assistant.

The assistant lurched over as his shoulder broadened, finally ripping his shirt to shreds. His upper back exploded with rippling muscles that would make any man jealous. And his lower back slimmed to give his body a strong V shape. Moments later he started to flex his arms, making them balloon with every flex. His biceps grew to the size of melons as veins surfaced all down his arms. And his hands thickened into massive man hands, twice the size of his old delicate hands.

Mr. Derry let out a loud scoff as he watched the assistant transform into the man he wanted to be. And the technician just smiled at Me. Derry's dismay. Meanwhile the assistant started to let out deep guttural moans pleasure as his body grew, and animalistic grunts every time he flexed his growing body.

Next, the man's lower body started to grow, making him nearly a foot taller than he was before, towering over everyone in the building. His thighs thickened to over twice the size of his massive biceps, making him have the man spread to make room for all the muscle. Unsurprisingly it didn't take long for his pants to rip to shreds, leaving him in his comically small underwear. Though that wouldn't last long either. His flat ass got flooded with both fat and muscle, making it large and plump and creating a shelf over his thighs. His fat ass strained against the shockingly strong fabric of the underwear before overpowering them, bouncing as his cheeks tore right through them. His calves also grew quite thick and defined as his feet burst out of his shoes, becoming a monstrous size 20. Though the only downside is his impressive package shrunk from a massive 8 inches to an unremarkable 4 inches, looking small in comparison to his hulking body.

Finally the man's head began to change to match his body. His barely visible jawline looked like it got vacuum sealed around his jaw, becoming sharp as a knife. His brow bone became more prominent, adding to his manly appearance as a well kept beard spreads across his face. And his long flowy hair recedes into a military buzz cut.

By the time the transformation slowed, his skin had a bronze tanned color with a slick sheen of oil over it. Almost as if he was getting ready to compete.

"You fucking idiot. Look at the mess you've made. You need to clean this up ASAP, and you better hope that machine has some juice left for me or so help me god I will bury you six feet under Edward!" Mr. Derry blew up with rage, it almost looked like there was smoke coming from his ears.

The assistant stood up tall with his head up and his chest puffed out. Slowly taking steps towards his boss, making the ground shake with each step. As he got close, his brows furrowed and his grunt became deeper and louder. He bent down and yanked his boss by the collar, lifting the shorter man a foot off the ground to meet eye to eye.

"You think I need a fucking pipsqueak like you! You're nothing but a bug to step on. And my name is Evan, asshole! Remember it!" Evans voice booked across the room as he chuckled his former boss into the machine, breaking it in the process.

He stomped across the room and grabbed a black pair of underwear from the rack. Then he proceeded to waltz on stage, stealing the hearts of the audience.

Evan was the star of the show, winning an easy first place. Photoshoots, magazine covers, and sponsors were all he saw in his future. And he never saw his loser of a boss again.

[camillelespanayesbtch]

I Left My Conscience On Your Front Door Step (18+)

Content: Brief smut, swearing, typical (and a-typical) Camille stuff

Word Count: 4098

Author's Note: I rushed the end, I'm sorry. I just didn't have the motivation :( I do have an idea for a series where Camille is a vampire if anyone is interested please send an anon!

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“Sorry it took so long, Camille. Two of the Starbucks didn’t have the shots you liked, so I had to drive to the other side of town,” you say even though the excuses meant nothing to Camille, but they calmed the anxiety that had been bubbling under the surface. That anxiety bubbled as you drove from store to store just to get her fucking coconut milk coffee with a double shot of the best espresso available from that corporation. You set the takeout cup down and only then do you realize you should have fixed something- the one mistake you’d made other than being late with her coffee.

Camille eyes the take-out cup, turning it around then looks at you, “They spelled my name wrong. It’s C-A-M-I-L-L-E, not fucking C-A-M-E-E. You’re still relatively new, I’ll let it slide this time but don’t make a habit of it.” She picks it up and starts to drink it, leaning back in her desk chair as she watches you, she enjoyed watching you stew over the little things.

“It’s not my fault they’re fucking stupid. They’re Starbucks baristas, not Harvard educated people,” you reply, checking your tablet for what Camille had going on that day and you too.

Camille snorts and shakes her head, “Don’t you get it, Yn? You work for me. Ergo, it means that you have to make sure things go well. Ergo, you have to ensure that the fucking Starbucks barista spells my fucking name correctly, got it?” She smiles at the end although it was one of her subdued anger smiles that lets you know if you piss her off again, you’ll be her glorified footstool for the rest of the day. You did make such a wonderful stool too, back straight and silent, just the way she likes you.

You swallow the lump in your throat and nod, your cheeks turning pink, “Yes, Camille. I’ll remember that for next time.” You would make sure that you did, whether it be making a note of it in your calendar or on the order itself- No, you couldn’t do that because then Camille would know that you were imperfect, and she always wanted perfection in every aspect of her life which now included you. You, her assistant, and according to the NDA you filled out with heated cheeks, her pretty little whore.

“Good,” she drinks another mouthful of her coffee before returning it to her desk, scrolling through her phone before her eyes meet yours. “This job isn’t easy, okay? But I need you to want this. I need you to want this job and everything it entails.” She had her fair share of assistants, and her last lot coupled up and it was the most pathetic little display she’d ever seen in her life. They fell in love with each other? Just as she finished paying off both their student loans? What a fucking coincidence. And Camille L’espanaye doesn’t believe in coincidences.

“I know. I know, and I do want this.” You meet her gaze, she always looked so perfect; the slightest hint of blue to the inner corner of her eyes, the sharp eyeliner that isn’t exaggerated, the soft fullness to her eyelashes, and her eyes themselves- a grey green that reminded you of aged jade, expensive, elite, rare, everything that Camille is. “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want this job and everything it entails.” You hadn’t been intimate with her until the third day of your new position, and she made it perfectly clear that she wasn’t going to touch you unless you had earned it and you hadn’t earned it yet. You had a feeling in your gut that you were never going to earn being fucked by her unless she was just going to use your body to get off herself.

Camille chuckles and shakes her head before tilting her head slightly as she drags her eyes over you, “Please. You’re here because I’m paying off your student loans. What were you trying to graduate with again? A master’s in psychology… Now look at you. Oh, you’d surely make such an interesting research paper on yourself, don’t you think? An assistant and a whore. You don’t fool me, Yn.” She rolls her eyes; you were just another nobody after her money so you didn’t have to pay off your own student debt and thought that selling your body to her would make it happen faster. She knew she was attractive, hot, sexy, so who wouldn’t want a chance to be touched by her? To even be close to the one and only Camille L’espanaye. She’d had people stumbling over themselves in the street trying to get to her to even say hi and then be ignored. You weren’t special.

Her words stung and you knew that was her intention; it was either this job or your degree, and being a waitress wasn’t cutting the loan repayments or even being close to covering rent. So, now you sell your body to your boss and do the dirty work for her too. The corner of your mouth twitches slightly in a brief smirk, “Oh Camille, you say that like you don’t enjoy when I eat you out under your desk.” You pout, “I’m wounded.” If you closed your eyes and thought about those times, you could still taste her on your tongue, a little tangy but mostly sweet with the slightest musk, and you would lap up every drop too just to savor her. 

The silver-haired woman looks slightly taken aback by what you’d just said, her tan cheeks taking on the slightest pink hue to them, almost matching the lipstick she often painted her lips with. “I enjoy getting off, the person that does it doesn’t matter to me. You keep talking to me like this, and I’ll find someone who won’t run their pretty little mouth as much as you.” She crosses her legs and drinks another mouthful of her coffee, her pupils dilating as she remembers how eager you were to eat her out the first time- the sparkle in your eyes, the devotion you looked up at her with, it was that moment that she knew you were just a stray dog that needed just a little more training. The first time you only managed to make her cum once with your mouth before you got sloppy because it was aching too much, your fingers finished her off, but she was pissed and told you to get better. How did you get better? Cleaning her heels and boots with your tongue until they showed her reflection, she didn’t realize how wet that made you until she heard you in the bathroom masturbating.

“I’m sure you enjoy it more than you’re letting on, Camille,” You head back over to the couch, leaning back against it and looking through the tablet again. This little device was the holy grail of information, and if you lost it, Camille would have your head on a platinum Cartier plate. She couldn’t afford to have the information you were dealing with slip into the hands of the wrong person because then it’d make her look bad and there’s one thing that’s consistent with her- she always looks really fucking good.

Camille narrows her eyes at you, it’d be so fucking easy for her to slap you, to hit you, choke you even- leave welts on your skin from the claw marks her nails leave, but she doesn’t. She wants to, God does she want to see your pretty skin marked up because of her, hear the way you whine and moan and hiss as she does, then as she touches each one as a reminder of what had happened. She takes a breath and exhales slowly like she’d seen on those shitty mindfulness videos that circulate around. She didn’t like your cockiness, only she was allowed to be that cocky. Only her. “Did you get the information on Victorine like I asked?”

“Of course I did, Camille,” you put the tablet to the side before looking through your bag, you’d had a number of documents printed and stapled together so she didn’t have to deal with the same mess of papers you had. You pull them out of your bag before heading over to her.

“Took you long enough. I require things I ask of you in a timely manner, Yn. Not at your earliest convenience. Mine.” She takes the papers from you and flicks through them, her eyes quickly scanning the pages, her lip twitching, “Is this it? That’s all you got? How am I supposed to nail her down with this shit?” Camille tosses the documents, the pages fluttering through the air before hitting the ground in front of her desk. Couldn’t you do one fucking thing right today?

You chew your bottom lip, stopping yourself from peeling a piece of skin from it like you had a nasty habit of doing, “That was all I could find-“ Your cheeks flush at her unimpressed stare, butterflies in your stomach much like the papers, they float around before hitting the bottom with a dull thud. “I’ll go look again, Camille.” How could you have been so stupid as to think that this would be enough? You’re a smart woman, you should have known better than to hand her some falsified documents that could be brushed under the rug fairly quickly. Try harder. Do better.

“Yes, you will go look again, Gina.” She drinks some more coffee before deciding that she’s had enough, tossing it in the bin then screwing her nose up when the lid pops off and spills coffee into it. “We both know this woman is killing innocent animals left right and center. And we both know that the only animals that deserve to die are men,” she looks at you and smiles, “So, go find me something more useful than pages of words.” Camille drums her nails against the desk, tilting her head slightly as she watches the little cogs turn in your head- she wondered if there was a little hamster or other vermin running around.

“Yes, Camille, I agree with you- I’ll keep looking,” you pick the documents up and go back to the couch to look again. There were multiple avenues that you had access to, seeing things you never wanted to see again, reading things you never wanted to, and oh- “I found a feed from the room they do the surgery in. Victorine front and center along with her wife. Nobody likes seeing animals getting hurt.” The video made you feel ill, incredibly so, so you look away before what little breakfast you had resurfaced.

Her head shoots up from her phone, her eyes twinkling with unbridled glee, “Oh? Video footage? Do show me, puppy.” She holds her hand out expectantly, taking the tablet from you once you place it in her outstretched hand. And like the obedient little doggy you are, you gently place it in her hand, being careful to not catch her acrylic nails which so often dug so deliciously into your scalp.

“She’s right there helping her wife with the surgery, that’s damning enough, isn’t it?” You hoped it was anyway- You didn’t really understand Camille’s hatred towards her siblings, in the sense that outside of the awful things they were doing you couldn’t see it as your run-of-the-mill sibling hatred, the feeling she had- That was barely contained rage, disgust, like if she could, she would kill the woman and spit on her grave, but that was beneath Camille, she’d much rather have you do the dirty work instead. You watch her reaction to the video, the video you found, and hoped it would satisfy her after screwing up with the written documents. But you should know by now, Camille is rarely satisfied.

“There’s no audio. It’s okay, but it could be better,” she pouts, restarting the video to watch her half-sister butcher a poor chimpanzee. While she was partially doing this for purely selfish reasons, she couldn’t help but feel bad for the animals being experimented on and she knew once she screwed her half-sister over, they would be free from being used as guinea pigs for the stupid heart mesh. Good idea in theory, but Victorine was stupid.

You take an unsteady breath, picking at your fingers behind your back so the silver haired beauty wouldn’t notice, “The audio version is bound to be out there somewhere. It’ll just take some time to find it.” You weren’t sure about that actually, for all you knew, that was the only video footage of the brutality. You wonder if Camille knew you were bluffing about that, she’s a smart woman, she’d know.

“Usually, surveillance videos don’t have any audio, smarty pants,” she remarks, eyes still glued to the screen, the faintest hint of a smile on her face as she replays the video. Even without the audio, Victorine was fucked. F-U-C-K-E-D.

“Usually, scientists record their experiments in more ways than one, so, there’s bound to be a version with audio out there somewhere.” You take the tablet back, Camille almost pouting when you do. You knew this would be good enough for now, it could be explained away as an accident- But how do you accidentally cut open a chimpanzee and force your shitty heart mesh around its heart just to prove that your product works when you know it doesn’t.

Camille nods and looks at you, “I like the way you think. You’re not afraid of anything, are you?” She needed someone fearless to be able to do this work, fear inhibits the ability to find the dirtiest of information and she couldn’t have that. Not in her line of work, your line of work. You were going to be her dog with a bone, a nose for sniffing out the filthiest information, and the ability to spin it almost as good as she does.

Your cheeks color and you look at the ground before meeting her penetrating gaze, “Fear stops you from doing things and taking what you deserve. I wouldn’t be here if I let fear get the best of me.” You remember applying for an interview and shaking your head because you really didn’t have much to offer her at all- you had heard rumors about what she asked of her assistants, but you didn’t take them to be true. She had stopped you before you sat down, inspected you like you were a piece of meat, and you couldn’t deny how hot it made you. When you read through the NDA, your cheeks had burned, and you squirmed in your seat much to Camille’s amusement.

The corner of her lip turns up in a smirk as she sits back, raising a brow, “You’re scared of me.” She tilts her head slightly and runs her eyes slowly down your body, while the uniform she chose left too much to the imagination, she loved how it made you look. Like you were going to her to be taught something, and you were. She was your teacher, and you were her good little student, doe-eyed and expectant.

You feel your cheeks take on more color, they were bound to be a deep red by now, and you hated yourself for the reaction. You weren’t scared of her, right? Your heart rate did increase when you were around her, butterflies fluttering in your stomach, but that wasn’t fear? Unless you misunderstood those reactions and were actually experiencing bouts of anxiety when around her. “Why would I be scared of you?”

“Because I’m fucking terrifying, look at me,” she gestures to herself, she didn’t have to sell herself to you because she knew the look in your eyes, the desire, the want, the lust. Yet you were still timid about showing it, not always, but most of the time. There was just the faintest flicker of fear in your eyes, she could see it even if you didn’t want to admit it. It made her hot.

You let out a bit of a chuckle, shaking your head, “You’re hot and intimidating, Camille, but not terrifying.” It didn’t take much for her to intimidate you, she could back you up against the wall and your breath would catch in your throat before a burning heat settled itself between your legs, your lips parted, and pupils blown. Maybe that was fear. And fear does strange things to your body when it involves one Camille L’espanaye.

“That’s because you haven’t seen me,” she smirks, running her tongue over her upper teeth much like an awaiting lion does when it sees prey. “You’ll see,” it was a promise, one way or another you would see her, and she couldn’t wait to get her hands on you when you do. When you do realize just how fucking scary she can be, then she’ll fuck every single thought out of that head of yours until you’re a pretty little doll for her.

“I can’t wait then,” you smile despite the brief flicker of anxiety that goes through you at her look, you didn’t mind being treated like a doll but this look was different, it made your breath catch in the back of your throat, and made you rub your thighs together briefly, subtly in hopes she would notice but of course she does- she always does. “You’d be surprised what I find attractive, Camille.”

“Oh?” Her smile grows and somehow her teeth seem sharper than before, she loved where this is going and it excited her deeply, “We have yet to talk about hard and soft limits. I know we’ve already fucked, but limits were never discussed.” She wasn’t a freak that didn’t respect those things, she took them seriously and would respect you outside of the bedroom while she was disrespecting your perfect body in the bedroom. She absolutely loved the sounds you made and how you looked with pretty bruises and bite marks all over.

“You’d listen to that?” You ask in disbelief before apologizing, she hadn’t indicated that she wouldn’t listen to you in bed, in fact when you’ve asked her to slow down previously, she has- same with when you asked her to stop. She was ruthless but she wasn’t a monster. You take a breath, taking the pad of paper on her desk and pen before writing them down, “You’re not a freak, are you?” You look at her, “Not into that piss or crap stuff because I’ll quit right now if you are.”

Camille screws her nose up in disgust, offended you’d even ask her such a thing- she’s a classy woman, not some bottom-feeder, “Ew, fuck no.” She gags, getting herself a coconut water to wash down the bad taste you’d put in her mouth, “I just want to know what you like so when you’re not servicing me, I can make sure you’re having fun too.” Her eyes follow every stroke of the pen, the longer the list of your green-light things grows, the more the fire builds in her stomach, the stronger the electricity surges through her veins.

“Good,” you hand the list over to her, your cheeks coloring when you see a wolfish grin. “I think you’ll be surprised the extent of things I find enjoyable.” You bite back a squeak when she points to the ground in front of her seat. You quickly move into position, your fingers itching to touch her creamy thighs, “Please-“

“Hm?” She looks at you over the top of the list you just wrote for her, “Please what? You can’t already be that desperate.” She looks back at the list, “Then again, the list does just scream desperate little slut. I wonder if I can get a stamp made just for you, stamp it right on your forehead so you see it every time you look in the mirror.” She chuckles at her idea, rather pleased with herself. “Yes, I think you’ll find a place that makes custom stamps so I can have one. Be a good little puppy and do that for me, hm?” Camille reaches down to pat your head, her hand moving down to stroke your cheek after, thoroughly enjoying the way you melt into her touch.

“A- A stamp? I suppose I could do that. Do you want me to do it now? I-“ You grab your tablet to start looking, ignoring the pain starting to grow in your knees the longer your kneeling on the tile flooring of her office. You quickly find a place that makes custom stamps, holding up a selection of colors up to her so she could pick, “I think the red is nice.”

Camille hums, “It would be more bold, wouldn’t it? Harder to hide, and more likely to stain, how fun.” She grins and nods for you to get on with it before focusing back on reading through your list of kinks.

“Red,” you repeat quietly before looking back at your tablet and order the stamp, your cheeks starting to burn at the text she wanted on it. Your mind starts to wonder about what the people who were in charge of making these custom stamps would think of this one, but they were also likely to have received far worse than this. You clear your throat, “I’ve ordered it. Estimated time is two weeks.”

“Always so quick to do what I ask of you,” she smiles, putting the paper on her desk before stroking your cheek, her hand moving down to cup your jaw and tilt your head up. She runs her thumb lightly under your bottom lip as her eyes stare into yours, her lip twitches when you press a soft kiss to the pad of her thumb before parting your lips to suck on it lightly. Camille lets out a pleased sigh, her pretty eyes darkening, “Such a good little puppy, aren’t you? So damn eager to please.”  She lets you suck her thumb a little longer before pulling it out and spreading her legs, “Come on, you’ve earned a treat.”

You gently rest your hands on her legs, moving closer so you could press kisses to her thighs. Her skin felt like silk, you could smell the lotion she uses and you found yourself never wanting to smell anything else. You go to graze your teeth against her skin but Camille tugs your hair roughly, “Don’t bite me,” she warns, only letting go when you rush out an apology. You kiss her skin again, murmuring another apology before carefully pushing her skirt further up her hips, your eyes darkening when you see her panties. You hook your fingers into them and tug them down. According to Camille, you were taking too long so she grabs your head and forces you between her legs. You let out a moan when you get your first taste of her, your tongue running through her folds and eagerly lapping her up. You swirl your tongue around her clit lightly before wrapping your lips around it and sucking gently, your finger starting to tease her pussy. You slowly push into her, gasping when her nails dig into your scalp, holding you firmer against her as you start to finger her. The louder Camille became, the more eagerly you pleased her, not stopping until you feel her gush against your face, and even then you lap her juices up not wanting to waste a drop.

Camille lets go of you and you rest your head against her lap as you both catch your breath, “Fuck,” she says after a few moments of heavy breathing, “I should get you to do that more often.”

You look up at her with twinkling eyes, “I’d stay under your desk if I could. That’s how addictive you are, Camille.” She chuckles and pats your cheek before leaning back and closing her eyes. “I’ll get you a coconut water-“

“No,” she cuts you off, “Just- Just sit, please.”

“Okay,” you smile and relax against her, wrapping an arm around her leg and closing your eyes too, the only sound in the room was your breaths. You didn’t want to think about it too much, her asking you to stay, what it meant, the consequences because that would ruin the content feeling that was washing over you and you didn’t want that. You just wanted to enjoy being this close to her. To enjoy being allowed to be this close to her. Camille, what an enigma.

[heretyc]

Hiya!! I love your outlast writings and I was thinking, Franco's wife/lover setting up a date night for him in between trails. Like a candle lit dinner in the office of the Poison the Medicine or a movie night in the Pleasure the Prosecutor theater. Something that shows they care about him and wanted to do something Special!

Who-knows maybe they even made him his favorite drink using some Special milk they acquired from all thought anti-psychotics 🤭 Either way Franco's bouncing around my skull and Im happy to be here reading your fics 🥰

I'm so glad you like them!! I know I've only known the dude for maybe 3 weeks now, but he's so much fun to write for!! 💓 I haven't given Pleasure the Prosecutor much love, so this lil fic will take place in it. It's such a fun trial if not for the sitting and waiting for the mannequins lmfao. Reagent/MC is a woman simply because there's breastmilk involved! Under the cut for length.

"What's all this, huh?" A brow raised, Barbi looked around the theater with a hint of surprise and adoration; the sweet scent of artificial apple filled the space, and he realized he hadn't smelled it in a long time. A little too long. "My sweetness really knows how to make a man feel special," He snickered, walking closer to you. This place was more than familiar to him, and yet he felt like he was in someplace new...the combination of the lighting and the scent knew how to mess with a man's sense of familiarity.

"I have to show my appreciation somehow, right?" You teased, pulling out a chair for him; the theater was completely clean of mannequins - after Barbi stated how...creepy they really were - and the lighting was low. He sat down in the chair with a purr, taking your left hand and laying a kiss onto the ring he had placed on there weeks prior. "It feels like yesterday was the day we tied the knot," He lamented, leaning his head onto his hand as he watched you sit down across from him. "Y'know it's a gentleman's job to pull out his chair for his woman."

"Oh, hush," you chuckled, pouring liquid from a mixer into two glasses; a wine glass for you, a whiskey glass for him. "You've been quite the gentleman since I met you in that first trial."

"Swore you were the light of my eye, and it wasn't the sun symbol for that stupid fuckin' puzzle," Barbi snickered, his eyes soft as he watched you pour the liquid. He could smell the amaretto from here; wolf's milk. His beloved drink of choice. Despite making a face whenever you make it, you always make sure to welcome him with it. "I regret nothin'."

"Likewise." You winked, "So...I wanted to tell you something."

"My ear's are open, sweetness," His brow raised once more, a gloved finger tapping against the ratty tablecloth. "No judgement from me. You know that."

You cleared your throat, "Well...I've been taking too much antipsychotics, as of late. And...with all of the breast massages you've been giving me..."

Ohhh, Barbi could already tell what you were going to say. He gripped the tablecloth, his eyes wide with newfound excitement, "Oh my god."

"I had a feeling you'd know," you chuckled, "I'm lactating. And it isn't pus...it's legit breastmilk. So to surprise you, I added some to your-"

It didn't even register in his head before he took his glass and shot it back, humming and moaning in delight. "Holy fuck, sweetness," He rasped, slamming the glass down onto the table, "That...is fucking primo shit. Did you add coconut??"

"Nope."

Ohhh, how he loved coconut, how it reminded him of his days in Cuba as he slung drugs under the Caribbean sun as he sipped at pina coladas. Before he knew it, he slammed his hands onto the table, his eyes desperate and lidded, "Sweetness...take off your shirt."

You're surprised he had the patience to ask.

[arctic-hands]

My milk journey has been

First meal: rice porridge with breast milk

Start dropping weight and can't stay out of the bathroom by age seven, get told to avoid dairy so mom buys Lactaid milk for a year. Whole family despises it and Mac and cheese in particular is now terrible and avoided. I'm still very sick anyway

Be diagnosed with Crohn's at age nine. Resume consuming regular dairy

Twelve-ish: begin to feel a little distress at eating ice cream. Does not stop me from accepting a Dairy Queen cheesequake blizzard reward for single handedly winning a science class quiz game that was supposed to be played in teams but no one wanted me. By sheer force of will and remarkable sphincter control for an IBD patient, mange to wait it out get home that day before having a violent reaction.

Thirteen: throw up violently at school after having cheese sticks for my free lunch. Convince myself it was just the greasiness of the meal that set me off

Fourteen: go into high school conceding the point that I'm lactose intolerant. Unsuccessful at lobbying the head principal to provide lactose free strawberry milk. Start paying more money than a lunch would have even cost if I didn't qualify for free lunch at the snack bar for juice or V8 in order to not go thirsty at lunch. Repeatedly throw up when the only option for lunch other than the very popular spicy chicken every Wednesday that I couldn't tolerate mouth-wise or gut-wise was the same cheesesticks that I had in middle school

Sometime later in high school: discover the Meijer's house brand of lactose free milk actually tastes decent.

Seventeen-ish. Find a hair in the carton of Meijer's lactose free milk and swear off it forever. Try rice milk

(Also an aside at seventeen: develop celiac disease and I thanked my lucky stars that it was polite enough to have waited until I was done with wildly ableist school and too old to trick or treat)

I forget which age but I was a fresh and new adult: discover rice milk ice cream. Desperately pretend it tastes and feels like real ice cream.

Shortly after: try coconut milk. It's tasty, but hardly a neutral milk-like taste and doesn't go well when mixed with other ingredients. Coconut milk ice cream is likewise lackluster

Nineteen? Discover the boxed and shelf stable almond milk. Begin to have hope.

Twenty: find out they started making a cartoned and refrigerated almond milk that tastes brilliant

Twenty three? Realize I have forgotten the taste of dairy milk. Almond milk reigns Supreme

Twenty-six: find out what an environmental menace the non-native aimond trees used in American almond milk is to drought-stricken California. Feel guilty but also feel like there's no real way to avoid drinking almond milk

Twenty-eight: Oat milk explodes in the plant milk scene. I ignore this because there's a high likelihood of cross contamination with wheat in both the field crop and in the processing of oats in the same facilities of wheat. No major and common oat milk brands have any gluten free signage

Twenty nine: Oatly converts its American version to gluten free oats brown in dedicated fields and processing facilities. Try it and it's decent. (CAUTION: some celiacs have a reaction to oats themselves regardless of any cross-contamination. I, however, am not one of them.) Become mostly fully converted to oat milk but still keep ordering almond milk when I get an iced coffee because Dunkin and the anarchist coffee shop/bookstore never label which brand of oat milk they use and you're a millennial and despise phone calls

Thirty: Planet Oats is a bit cheaper so I try it on a lark and like it better. Be bummed that it comes in a smaller carton that Oatly and thus is more expensive in the long run. Start putting oat milk in my oatmeal and have a religious crisis because it seems like a decadent and cardinal sin. Remember I'm an atheist and it's okay to be a lil hedonistic and perverse esp where food is concerned

Nearly thirty-one: realize halfway in making this post that it's entirely boring and pointless and is too long for such an uninteresting subject but goddammit I've sunk the cost and will finish this stupid post.

[milkybonya]

midnight rain ☆ pjh

order 063, anon: large coconut milk tea for trsr Jihoon (song = midnight rain by Taylor Swift)

! : fluffy start, angsty middle and open/hopeful ending?! ft. a breakup :(

# : idol!jihoon x office worker!(gn)reader, inspired by Taylor Swift's song

[💌: anon i'm so sorry for taking so long T_T pls enjoy even though idk how much i can defend the quality!!!]

dating an idol is everyone's dream, but no one thinks about it being like this: an idol is someone with a dream and goal, already running straight towards that thing... but you just wanted to be loved. the intentions misaligned and that's why things couldn't work out between you and Jihoon.

when you first met him, he was in front of you in the starbucks line. right away, you could tell he was different. he wore heavy, black boots, patterned jeans with chains that jingled every time he moved the slightest amount, his blazer was also uniquely patterned, and his hair had a slightly blue tint to it.

once you both ordered, you stood to the side to wait for your drinks. he looked attractive even while scrolling through his phone, and you wondered how that could be.

so lost in this boy's appearance, you didn't hear your name even when it was called about four times.

then...

"hey, you were after me in line, right? is that your drink? they're calling your name," the boy told you.

"huh? oh.. yeah," was all you could mumble as you staggered forwards.

but before you knew it, he had picked up the drink for you and was holding it out.

"are you okay?" he asked as you stared at his fingers holding your cup. the silver rings twinkled under the ceiling lights.

"yeah," you said again, taking the drink while squinting at the name written on his own cup.

"Jihoon".

"well, have a good day, then!" Jihoon told you with a smile so gorgeous that even his eyes were part of it.

as you turned to leave, you didn't notice that your wallet fell. you opened the café's door and stepped out while Jihoon eyed the wallet, then your back.

sucking in a breath through his teeth, he picked up your wallet and chased after you.

you had moved so far in such a short amount of time that he was panting when he reached you, a small drop of sweat sliding down his smooth face.

"y/n, you dropped this!" he said while holding out your wallet.

"oh! thank you..." you replied, taking the wallet with both hands.

the tips of Jihoon's ears were red as he said, in a low voice, "well now that i've ran into you for a second time.. can i ask for your number?"

you were shocked that someone this gorgeous would be asking you for your number first, but who were you to say no?!

you switched numbers and just a few hours later, Jihoon was already asking when you'd be free to meet again. he claimed it was destiny that you dropped your wallet, and he couldn't let you slip away.

so, you met up on a friday evening after your long workday. Jihoon listened to you as you complained about work at the office, and he also began to reveal to you that he was an idol.

"can idols.. date?" you asked, worried.

"no.. i mean, i can't right now. so i wanted to tell you, in case you don't want to move forward with this secret relationship."

his painted nails wrapped around the coffee mug in front of him, bringing it to his lips.

"well, Jihoon. you can't just make me fall for you and tell me not to stay," you said with a smile.

and that's how your relationship started.

it was built and upheld by fleeting nights spent chasing after each other in the dark, running to his dorm and him running to your office when you worked late. he'd drop off food and you'd go to his dorm to place kisses all over his soft face. some nights, he'd stay at your place, holding you close and singing you to sleep.

you both formed the most precious, perfect relationship. even if it was all in secret, you were so, completely, and utterly satisfied. content. in love.

but Jihoon started to feel suffocated. he noticed how comfy and safe you were in his presence. he listened as you shared your plans for the future to marry him and have kids with him. he listened and realized.. he didn't want that. what he envisioned when he saw the future was him, treasure, the 12 treasure boys succeeding and making it big. he didn't exactly see himself settled in a house with kids, but he saw himself on stage winning awards.

that's when you started noticing him getting distant. he'd reply to you late and wasn't always there at the dorms or the yg building when you went to see him. when you did get to see him, he was quiet and on his phone. his skin, lips, touch, and hugs felt cold. he felt like a ghost, a skeleton of Jihoon and not the actual Jihoon.

when you were going to confront him about it, he beat you to it. the two of you were sat in the same starbucks that you met, awkwardly holding your half-empty cups as you each waited for the other to speak.

"y/n... i have something to tell you," Jihoon said, softly. his voice sounded warm for the first time in a while.

"okay.."

"i love you a lot, i really do.. but i don't think i see us going any further," he said.

tears were already threatening to leave your precious eyes.

"you want to get married and settle down, but... right now, i just want to be a successful idol. that's all i see for myself right now," Jihoon explained.

you hummed along to his words, looking down and rubbing your thumb along the rim of your starbucks cup.

"how do you feel... about this?" he asked, his voice shaky as he tried to be careful with his words.

"i think i get it, Jihoon. i noticed you were withdrawing yourself from me... it's gonna be really hard but let's end this if that's how you feel," you said, lips wobbling.

unable to look at your now ex any longer, you stood up and left, just like that. and that was the last time you saw Jihoon in-person. it was also the last time you entered that starbucks, since it was the place you both met and lost the most important lover in your life.

Jihoon and the treasure boys did well after you and Jihoon ended things. you always told yourself that maybe it was thanks to the breakup, trying to find ways to console yourself that your tragic end was meant to be. yet you, on the other hand, were still at your 9-5 office job.

you followed treasure an unhealthy amount online, tracking their comebacks and interviews, promotions and schedules. it wasn't even to see Jihoon... or maybe it was, but it was to see how the treasure boys were doing.

on one interview, the boys were asked to talk about the people/things they 'treasure' the most. while many of the boys answered 'teume' and Hyunsuk mentioned his grillz, Jihoon said, "there is someone i'm thinking about right now and i just want to tell them that we'll meet again whenever they decide to step out of their comfort zone and start living the life they want."

your heart beat quickly hearing those words, knowing immediately that they were for you. also, Jihoon was just right. after years of working at the office, trying to convince yourself that this stable life was what you wanted, you started to feel empty inside. really, you wanted to explore your options, discover the world and yourself.

whether it was because of Jihoon's words or your own change of heart, you decided to quit your job. soon after, your most important ex-lover found his way into your life again.

the day you quit your job, you decided to go back into the starbucks where you met Jihoon, even after swearing to never go back there again. and there he was, speak of the devil.

clad in the most simple clothes ever this time, Jihoon waited in line for his order to be taken. and this time, you'd be the one to take action first. you wouldn't wait for him to hand you your drink or chase aftee you with your dropped wallet, but you would take charge of your own destiny.

[yukipri]

Galaxy's Edge Foodstuffs & Drinkstuffs Reviews!

So last month, I was able to finally visit Black Spire Outpost, aka Batuu, aka Galaxy's Edge, aka Star Wars Land @ Disneyland!

This is a roundup of photos + reviews of all the themed foods & beverages that mum and I enjoyed during our trip.

Note that I visited Batuu West, in Disneyland California. Florida may have slightly different menus, and I know that menus change seasonally too! My visit was in January, 2023.

The rest of the photos + reviews under the cut!

Oga's Cantina

In the early morning on the very first day, we stopped by Oga's! We got some non-alcoholic drinks + some small eats to start the day off.

Non-Alcoholic drinks:

Memory's foggy, but I *think* the drinks are: 

Blurrgfire: Minute Maid® Lemonade, Pomegranate Juice, and Habanero-Lime

Review: Mildly zingy? but otherwise a pleasant juice drink.

Black Spire Brew: Cold Brew Joffrey's Coffee®, Honey, Falernum, Passion Fruit, and Citrus

Review: Probably the most questionable drink we had, but glad we tried it! The coffee + citrus gave it a sorta...sour? taste? and I'm not sure how I felt about that in my coffee! But it was certainly unique.

Blue Bantha: Blue Milk served chilled with Bantha-inspired Brown Butter Chocolate Chip and Coconut Cookie

Review: Realizing now we didn't get the cookie, sad ;_; It was ok, but idk it felt like it tasted a lot better from the Milk Stand! It was also kinda room temperature, though we *were* in the very first early morning round of people. Overall didn't stand out too much, but wasn't bad either!

Jabba Juice: Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Kiwi, Cantaloupe, and Blueberry Flavor-filled Boba

Review: A slightly mixed-juice but mostly orange juice with some blue popping boba! Was good in a normal, could probably make it at home sorta way.

Food stuffs:

Five-blossom Bread: Warm Pretzel Knot with Hawaiian Black Sea Salt, served with Calabrian Cheese Sauce

Review: It was super warm 'n toasty, surprisingly filling! It was a pretty normal pretzel and the sauce was a pretty normal slightly spicy cheese sauce, but it was still delicious!

Spiced Wroshyr Pods: Seasoned Edamame, Sliced Cucumbers, spicy Citrus-Gochujang Dip

Review: Ngl, these were just straight up plain edamame ^ ^;;; BUT the sauce was really good, preferred it to the pretzel sauce even!

I had another reservation at Oga's on a different night, and this time we tried some alcohol. Now, tbh I am not a huge fan of alcohol; I can drink it, but I just don't really like the flavor, and have never gotten drunk (nor do I really want to), and all it makes me feel is the vague urge to pee. But, I felt obligated to try something alcoholic at the cantina, so here's what I *think* we got!

Jedi Mind Trick (alcoholic): Ketel One Botanical Grapefruit and Rose Vodka, John D. Taylor's Velvet Falernum, Bols Blue Curaçao, White Grape Juice, Lime Juice, and Grapefruit Bitters

Review: It was defs sweet? Fruity? But alas, Alcohol taste was strong for me ;_;

Hyperdrive (Punch It!) (Non-alcoholic): Powerade® Mountain Berry Blast, White Cranberry Juice, Black Cherry Purée, and Sprite®

Review: Got one non-alcoholic drink, and ngl it was definitely my fav drink out of the 3 ^ ^; Unfortunately don't remember much of it, other than that I was using it to cleanse the alcohol flavor...

Fuzzy Tauntaun: Cîroc Peach Vodka, Bols Peach Schnapps, and Simply Orange® topped with Tangerine, Pure Cane Sugar, "Buzz Button Tingling" Foam

Review: This was the most recommended drink by people we spoke to + blogs I read, so I figured hey let's try it. Other people have described the foam as "tingly," but tbh...neither mum nor I really felt it? It was very foam for sure, messy, hard to get at the drink without getting foam all over your face. Taste was pretty mild (+ alcohol, LMAO).

In conclusion: Kazu, u know u don't like alcohol, plus it's expensive. Let's just stick to non-alcohol next time and save our credits, yeah? ^ ^;

Docking Bay 7

I LOVED Docking Bay 7! It was surprisingly spacious, and perhaps because we went when it wasn't too busy, but there was never any trouble getting seating. With mobile pickup food was ready almost instantaneous, and the whole interior had such an awesome aesthetic with tons of cool design details!

Trandoshan-style Pasta with Braised Bantha: Chile-braised Beef, Buttered Garlic Cavatelli, Seasonal Vegetables, Zesty Avocado Sauce, Balsamic Glaze

Review: This is the green-lookin' dish! I LOVED this one, so much I went and got it again on a different day. It's pasta, which I'm naturally biased towards, but also a lotta meat and veggies too, and pleasantly spiced. It felt like a Good Food, while also being unique and interesting enough it felt sorta Star Wars, I really enjoyed it!

Endorian Fried Chicken Tip-Yip: Crispy Chicken, Roasted Vegetable Potato Mash with Green Gravy

Review: Also good! But tasted a lot more "normal." It's a nice piece o' chickin floating in a ton of mashed potato gravy. Warm and filling, but didn't really feel as themed.

Drinks!

Moof Juice: Simply Fruit Punch®, Simply Orange® with Pineapple, Chipotle-Pineapple

Review: Another pleasant fruit juice! Gosh there are so many fruit juice mixes here! Not complaining bc I love them. Don't really remember too much about this other than "sweet."

Phattro: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade, Desert Pear

Review: Another mixed juice drink, mum and I could only tell it apart from Moof Juice bc this one was mildly less sweet, more tea. Both were good!

Cold Brew Black Caf: Cold Brew Coffee topped with Sweet Cream Cheese and Chocolate Puffs

Review: I actually really enjoyed this one!! Much more than the questionable coffee at Oga's. It's got literal cereal floating on top! One thing that we found was that it wasn't as sweet or well mixed right after picking it up (no duh), but if you wait for the cream cheese and cocoa puffs dust to trickle down (or just mix it), it's a lot sweeter and so much yummier!

Also from the Docking Bay:

Vintian Mineral Mousse: Banana Brûlée-centered Dark Chocolate Mousse, Strawberry Mousse, Vanilla Chantilly, Chocolate Crumble, Cherry Garnish

Review: THIS THING. Y'all, if I had to pick just one food item to recommend from all of Galaxy's Edge, it would be this. Wasn't really sure what it was at first, and almost didn't order because I'm not a huge fan of banana flavor, but I'm SO glad that we did. Each of the blobs is a different flavored mousse, the banana being the largest, and i *think* the blue was Vanilla, pink strawberry, though those may be flipped. They each had a sorta shell like covering with soft mouse inside. They all tasted incredibly fancy and delicate, like very expensive patisserie quality, and each blob was so distinctive so you never got bored. I even liked the banana one, though I preferred the other two. The best way to eat is to take a spoonfull, and then scoop through the crumble to pick up as much of it as possible. The added crunch makes it even better!

Overall, this not only tasted phenomenal, but it had gorgeous and distinctively "Star Wars" visual presentation, and overall was so unique!

Moving on,

Milk Stand + Ronto Roasters

While the Milk Stand and Ronto Roasters are completely different shops and aren't even close, I picked up drinks from the Milk Stand for breakfast on our second day, so reviewing them together!

Blue Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with alluring fruity characteristics

Review: The Iconic Drink. I hear that people have mixed opinions about this, but I actually really liked it—and it also tasted SUPER familiar. If any of you have had ramune before, the Japanese soda drink in a funky glass bottle that you can find at most Asian markets, it tasted SUPER similar. Perhaps part of me is biased bc my Japanese ass associates blue = ramune, but really, if someone made a ramune slush and maybe added a wee bit more citrus, this would be it. I also happen to love ramune, and slushes, so of course this was a win! If you want to taste ramune to see what Blue Milk tastes like (at least in my own humble opinion, backed by mum), make sure to pick up the "original" flavor! Overall this was super chilled and refreshing, I loved it!

Green Milk: Plant-based blend of Coconut and Rice Milk with zippy citrus and tropical characteristics

Review: I read some reviews that this was nasty, but I didn't think so, it was also pleasant. There was a bit of a strange, possibly slightly medicinal aftertaste, and it was also "milkier" than the blue so it felt less refreshing. Of the two, I definitely prefer blue, but enjoyed my cup of the green too!

Ronto Morning Wrap: Scrambled Eggs, Grilled Pork Sausage, Shredded Cheddar, Peppercorn Sauce, wrapped in Pita

Review: A very yummy wrap from Ronto's, only available in the morning! I felt like of the 3 wraps, this one was the richest, with a lotta cheese, egg, sausage. It was filling and super good! I wouldn't say that the food item itself felt particularly unique, but Ronto's has a super cool setup, so just being able to eat in the vicinity puts you into the universe.

Evening on a different day, we tried the other wraps!

Ronto Wrap: Roasted Pork, Grilled Pork Sausage, Peppercorn Sauce, tangy Slaw, wrapped in Pita

Review: The classic. I was expecting to like this one the most, and while it didn't disappoint, the others were actually so good they all sorta evened out? For being the meat option, it had a lotta veggies and didn't feel unhealthy, at least compared to my usual diet LMAO. I liked this a lot, and like the morning wrap, it was very tasty in a normal food sorta way!

Ronto-less Garden Wrap: Plant-based Sausage, spicy Kimchi Slaw, sweet Pickled Cucumber, Plant-based Gochujang Spread, wrapped in Pita

Review: Usually not a huge fan of fake meat, but this vegetarian option was actually really good! Of the 3, I think I might have even liked the flavoring best? It had a bit of zing to it, possibly due to the kimchi. Either way, I'm glad I was able to split these with mum!

Hard to say which of the wraps I liked most, I think I liked all of them around the same! None of them stuck out as Exceptional, but they were all good!

Drinks from Ronto:

Tatooine Sunset: Gold Peak® Unsweetened Tea, Minute Maid® Lemonade with Melon and Blueberry

Review: Yet another pleasant fruity drink! Don't remember much about it, other than that I liked it, and it once leaned mildly less sweet than the other one ^ ^;

Meiloorun Juice: Pineapple Juice, Minute Maid® Lemonade, with Blueberry, Cranberry Juice, Lemon Juice, and Desert Pear

Review: THIS ONE. If I had to choose ONE fruit juice out of the tons I had, this one is my favorite. I want to say that "Meiloorun" in the name isn't biasing me (it may be), but no really, this one was genuinely so good. It felt denser? than the others, really citrusy but the flavors were really well mixed so it tasted like an all-new fruit, exactly what I'd expect a Meiloorun to be like! I chugged two of these lmao.

Got this on the final day, also from Ronto:

Destran Ice Cap: Sprite®, Orange-Tangerine Syrup, topped with Sweet Cream Cheese

Review: Wasn't sure about the whole "cream cheese in soda," but I'm glad I tried this because I actually really liked it! The cream cheese added a pleasant, well, creaminess to the orange soda of the rest of it, giving it a sort of ice cream float-like feel without the ice cream. Would defs get again!

Lastly,

Kat Saka's Kettle

Picked this up on the last day!

Outpost Mix: colorful blend of seasonal flavors (blend of Caramel and Chocolate-glazed Popcorn)

Review: Honestly just a pleasant popcorn mix! It was good, flavor wasn't too strong, pretty mild. Was a nice easily consumable crunchy snack. It says caramel + chocolate, but tbh I mostly just tasted "mildly sweet." I was hoping for the brightly colored purple/red mix that at least looks a bit unique, but perhaps that's for a different season? Either way, yeah, I enjoyed this but didn't feel it was particularly special ^ ^;

~~

Aaaaand that's my review! I didn't quite eat *everything* at Galaxy's Edge, but I tried a darn good majority.

Overall, the vast majority of food/drink was super darn good and well worth the money! Some was more unique than others, but the quality was consistently high throughout. I did not eat outside of Galaxy's Edge my entire trip and felt very satisfied with that!

My standout favorites were: the pasta & mousse dessert from Docking Bay 7, blue milk from the Milk Stand, and Meiloorun juice from Ronto's!

I also got all 3 of the thermal detonator-shaped water bottles, but well, the flavor inside was just your regular Coke, Diet Coke, and Sprite. Still cool souvenirs!

But yes, in general, just so many fruit juices haha. Luckily I do love fruit juices, and also I'm glad that all of the bathrooms in Batuu were both clean, spacious, *never* had lines, and were also super cool-looking. Because given the amount of sugar water I was chugging, yeah. I visited them a lot!

While there's a good variety of food on Batuu and I think they did a great job with the menu, there were a few things that I hope they expand on in the future.

First, while there were some options for folks with dietary restrictions, they were extremely limited. Unsurprising, as most of the food shops already have an extremely limited menu with single digit menu items total. But it would still be nice to see these menus be expanded in the future, or possibly adding additional shops so that something, somewhere might work.

Next, I felt myself wishing for more take-home souvenir-type food. Liked boxed cookies, chocolates, y'know? Sure, you could technically take home the popcorn, but it's just in a brown bag. I'm genuinely shocked they didn't have Grogu's blue macaron cookies, I'm sure those would sell insanely well. Mouse-man, u listening?

Again, I know a lot of food menu items are seasonal/limited, so I hope I can visit again when things have switched around!

If you've been to Batuu, what were your favorite things to taste there?? Any hot items I missed?

Anyway, I hope you found this review to be interesting! Thanks for reading!!

[inscryptions]

[COCONUT] - A classic refreshment, served with two straws. Or you can crack open your own, if you really want to.

Gallagher settles in the shade near - but not next to - this asocial guest. At the periphery of any kind of boisterous fun, there are always figures like these, resistant to its pull but tethered all the same.

"Here." He slides a coconut with its top cracked open across the table that separates them. "A little taste of the island without all the noise. I won't bother ya anymore than that, don't worry."

I size up the approaching man from the corner of my eye before returning to my reading. Had I recognized I would get frequent interruptions by choosing this spot, I would've gone for a more remote one, but I've made myself comfortable here and would rather not move. There's plenty of shade, the beach is near enough that I could go down to the water at any time while also being far enough to mitigate the shouts and chatter of its occupants, and there's a cool breeze flowing through the area. I'm not about to go search out a better spot when I could be reading. So I keep my peripheral senses trained on the man as he sits down and slides something across the table between our chairs.

"Here."

At his explanation, I glance up, then sit up and take in the drink before me. How very considerate of him... actually, now that I think about it, the sun has moved quite a bit since I sat down here to read. My mouth feels dry in the heat, and I curse myself for forgetting to attend to my needs. This is why I lean so heavily on my schedule back home: by following it, I ensure I take care of myself in a timely manner. Here, however, it's a free-for-all, and as I so often do in the absence of work, I lose track of the time. I hadn't put my reading playlist on, either, and as a result I didn't know when to stop. This interruption was actually a good thing for me this time. "Thanks. I appreciate it." I pick up the drink and take a sip. The cool, refreshing taste of coconut milk, native fruit, and a hint of mint hit my tongue in a pleasant wave, and I close my eyes as I savor it. Yes... time for a break.

"This is good." I open my eyes and nod at the man. "Did you make it? You're pretty talented if so." I'd be curious to see where he learned his bartending skills from, or where he himself is from. That's some resourcefulness and experience at play that I've seen from some of the best bartenders I've come across. "And you're not bothering me much. You appear much more low-key than the others, and I needed to hydrate anyway."

[likebreadandwine]

(1/2) Today's donut was a repeat of last week's: vegan apple cider. They must have read my review, because the cider flavor was a tad stronger, the quantity of topping was a bit more modest, and there was a better ratio of cinnamon to sugar in it. The sweetness didn't drown out the underlying flavor quite so aggressively, so it had more of a straightforwardly autumnal taste. I'm still slightly hazy from all the sugar, though!

(2/2) Now that we're finally having normal autumn weather and I'm back to wearing long-sleeved button-downs, I've discovered that I'm overdue to go up a shirt size for better belly accommodation. Unrelated, it's been a crummy couple of weeks and I want to splurge on a tasty dinner for my Wednesday night out. Any suggestions?

hoorah! it's as if they know you deserve only the highest-quality donuts.

without knowing your taste, I'm not sure what to suggest for dinner. but I think what's most important, if you're going to splurge, is that you splurge entirely. order a drink you love, a fun appetizer, a main course that satisfies whatever craving you have, and then round things out with dessert.

I'll tell you how I splurged recently. I was craving Hawaiian poke all last week, so I picked some up from the place around the corner, with extra tuna. I fixed myself a drink—coconut rum and ginger ale. I had a side of ripple chips, for crunch. and later in the evening, I served myself some white chocolate raspberry truffle ice cream I'd gotten the day before when I went to get milk.

don't settle for one favourite thing when you could have all your favourites.

cheers xx

[checkoutmyflow]

Star Elite Trivia: De'Andre Wilde

So I'm remaking my old De'Andre trivia post.. I'mma try to post more often about my Blue Lock ocs, but I felt the need to redo this.

Now onto the post! Hope you enjoy?

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Hometown: Detriot, Michigan (June 21: Leo) - He shares his birthday with his twin brother, Amari Wilde. However, De'Andre's 6 minutes older than him.

Family: Father, (Deceased) Mother, Older sister, Twin (younger) brother, Younger brother, Younger brother & Younger sister (Twins)

Height & foot size: 181.6cm (5'11.5ft) and 28.7cm

Blood type: Rh-null (I have the rarest blood type in the world, apparently I get it from my mom.)

Favorite athlete: Joe Frazier

Age when he started playing: 10 years old

Favorite motto: "Wake up with purpose, sleep with satisfaction"

Best trait: His confidence (I know my worth, my skills and what I want to achieve in life.)

Worth trait: His desensitization (Due to being into horror pretty young, I'm desensitized to some things. Things that'd have a person's jaw dropped, or better yet, crying and hyperventilating, would probably be like watching a family movie on movie night for me. Not to say I'm completely apathetic tho.)

Favorite food(s): Anything spicy (I like the way spicy food feels in your mouth.. tho most spicy food doesn't have its spark as it did with me when I was younger tho.), Cajun food - Fun fact: De'Andre's spice tolerance is extremely high, so high that it's almost considered inhuman to other people - Favorite snack(s): Vegetables (Exs: Bell peppers, Cauliflower, Radish, Beets), Spicy peppers, Spicy snacks and candy - Favorite drink(s): Water, Gatorade (specifically red), Coconut milk, Almond milk, Orange juice, Ginger tea, Mint tea

Least favorite food: Natto (It looks like someone ejaculated into some beans... the texture is no better)

Hobbies: Martial arts, Body training, Anything horror related, Sports, Playing trombone, Cooking, Robotics

Favorite season: Spring and Early Autumn (I like the weather and temperature. it's perfect to work out in)

Favorite song: Hit em up by Tupac

Favorite movie(s): Real Steel, the Silence of the Lambs

Favorite manga(s): Black Lagoon, Hajime no Ippo, Berserk, and The Drifting Classroom

Favorite smell(s): Gasoline, Cinnamon, Pine, Sage

Favorite subject(s): P.E. and Science

Least favorite subject: English (It's just more boring to me than other subjects, though I'm good with it.)

Extra curriculars in school: Band (Trombone, Drum Major), Robotics club, Horror club

What makes you happy?: Hanging out with loved ones, Playing soccer with his brother and watching him improve

What makes you sad?: Amari being sad

What is your fetish: N/A (I don't think I have one.)

His type: Muscular people? (I've never liked anyone in THAT way before. Romantically or sexually. I just don't prioritize it? Though, I can admire a muscular person.)

First time someone confessed to him: 6 (It was from this one girl.. she still won't leave me alone to this day. She's a sweet girl, but FUCK is she annoying.)

Favorite childhood memory: When Amari had a nightmare and came into De'Andre's room to sleep in his bed with him. De'Andre agreed stubbornly, but to this day it's still his favorite memory. (Don't tell anyone I said that, especially Vespa, he won't ever shut the fuck up about it.)

Number of Valentine's chocolates he got: 100+ (I'm one of the most popular kids in school. I mean, yeah it's cool but sometimes I really wish I wasn't known like that because I have a whole ass fanclub at my high school... not fucking proud of it. Last Valentine's day I lost count with how many gifts I got... past 100 for sure.)

If he was able to take AllStars out for a day: He'd take them to an escape room. Bonus if it's a horror escape room.

His phobia: Pediophobia/Fear of dolls (I- fucking hate dolls. Fuck I hate them so-- fucking much.)

[butterscotchblues]

203.

on friday i went to AA and got my six month chip. a few weeks late, sure, but it still felt good. most of the people at that particular meeting have been sober for a very long time so they're pretty hype when a new sober person starts hitting milestones.

funny, i've been going to that same meeting for like 5 years on and off and this is the first time i've received any chip that wasn't the white one.

got there when everyone was sharing stories about how chaotic their drinking lives were. the host is an elderly black man--talks like an amalgamation of every southern uncle or deacon. he kept laughing every few sentences and saying "a lot of us should be dead". like.. he kept saying it lmao.

i disagree but i get it.

i've always considered myself a pretty chill person. and i'm sure a lot of folx would agree. but when i think about the shit i'd get into when i was drinking... well the lies ran deep.

i couldn't begin to count all of the times i found myself drunk as shit out alone in the dead of night or the early hours of the morning. how many times i've LEFT my home at 3am because my favorite bar didn't close til 4. it really used to feel like i had no control. like there was some unseeable force pulling and pushing me at all times. and it wasn't just the dangerous kinda chaos. it was the stupid kind and the thoughtless kind too. but i digress.

i think i'm only able to see myself, really, since i've quit. and when i sit in those AA rooms, usually as one of the youngest people there, and those folx start talking about having 20/30/40 year drinking careers, it puts things into perspective.

truly can't imagine living like that for decades. as in multiples of ten???

left AA with my lil chip and a handful of "congratulations" from the senior white folx and then pulled up at sevananda. been wanting to make my own almond milk for a while now. the energy in sev is almost always welcoming (especially if you don't work there). love seeing all the locs and fros and linen clothing and copper ankh jewelry lol.

the cashier was sweet and bubbly. caught me off guard when they started flirting. i hadn't been flirted with by a stranger in some time, i really don't be leaving the house like that lol. but it was cute.

left with my whole almonds and cheescloth, giddy for the creation to come, and drove to the decatur cemetary. bug randomly remembered that they have a huge pile of mulch there and she was right. so i grabbed two trashbags and filled them up.

sn: really enjoying gardening.

my next door neighbor came home while i was putting down the mulch and after i asked her for a rake to borrow, we got to talking about gardening. i noticed they had hella plants in a bed at the back of their yard and when i asked what they were growing, she named just about every vegetable growable in georgia lol. how inspiring. wonder if they'd be down to give me some tips.

pulled up on my plug a little later because he made me some thc oil. i really don't like smoking anymore but tree has been helping me sleep and alleviating my wrist pain. so edibles and tinctures are my favorites at the moment. he whipped me up a brownie pan worth of coconut oil and the shit is po-tent. very cool of him.

anyway, i guess i just wanted to remember friday. because it was a good friday. and i'm grateful.

[drawing-way-outside-the-lines]

➖ Mature content, 18+ ➖ check the trigger tags each time ➖

Chapter 46 - Everything seemed tainted by a gray light.

Episode 1. Akin: Sam, take a deep breath he spoke in a calm voice whatever the test result is, we will find the best way to deal with it.

Sam: He took a deep shaky breath easy for you to say, he rubbed his hands from his spot on the seat by Akin's work desk You are not the one who will lose your boyfriend, if your pregnancy test turns up positive.

Akin: If. He forced a soft smile

It had been a week since Sam had gotten his test result, and the days had been a long blur. He had stayed clear of pretty much everyone around him, barely picking up the phone, making excuses not to see anyone. He had a lot on his mind, and no leftover energy to deal with the world around him. It was a late Thursday evening, when someone knocked his door. He didn't want to open, but then a voice reached out to him

Andy: Sam! It's your dad… if you remember me by now? …. name's Andy… and I worry about you!

Sam: He sighed soft and couldn't help but smile, then he closed his book, got up from his couch and made his way to the front door, slowly opening it How could I forget you? he forced a small smile

Andy: He chuckled lightly, but his face looked unusually serious are you alright?

Sam: …. that's a matter of interpretation.

Andy: Mhh he nodded soft may I come in?

Sam: Sure he opened the door wider and stepped aside into the kitchen do you want anything to drink?

Andy: You don't have any soda, do you? he stepped into the house, quickly closing the door

Sam: No. But I have beer and wine…?

Andy: No thank you

Sam: He looked at his dad surprised Well… I got coconut milk or tea then?

Andy: He wrinkled his nose

Sam: He chuckled lightly okay, how about I put some coffee over then?

Andy: No, I can't have coffee, it's okay.

Sam: …. mineral water?

Andy: Yeah, sure…

Sam: He nodded confirming and reached for a glass in a cupboard

Andy: What's going on with you anyway? You disappeared for a week, not even Lina has seen you… is there something wrong?

Sam: He sighed soft and poured some mineral water for Andy in a glass, handing it to him that would again be a matter of interpretation.

Andy: Meaning? he sipped the water

Sam: Dad, it's rather personal and something I prefer to try to wrap my head around in private, at least for now. But I'm fine in the sense that nothing is 'wrong' with me, so please don't worry.

Andy: ……. he slow nodded, but it was easy to see he wasn't truly buying what Sam was trying to sell

Sam: He shook his head lightly and sighed soft it's nothing for you to worry about. He quickly walked to the counter, and poured some mineral water in his own glass, taking a sip I am sorry if I worried you though. That wasn't my intention.

Andy: No, I know that. It's just sad to me that you don't trust me with this…. whatever it is you're carrying around.

Sam: He sighed heavily, he honestly was carrying a lot more than he wanted to, and the thought of sharing it with someone suddenly felt almost liberating Dad I- He got interrupted as suddenly his mineral water combined with his dinner, decided to make a comeback and he barely made it to the sink

Andy: …………. he slowly stepped closer to Sam, grabbing his hair before Sam reached round 2 You're pregnant?

Sam: Akin told you?

Andy: No. But Lina might have mentioned yesterday that you had a strange reaction to a joke she made and shortly after that walked out on her last week.

Sam: He frowned soft and straightened up I'm sorry, I'll just go brush my teeth.

Andy: Yeah, well, nothing to apologize for… he slowly followed Sam to the bathroom It uhm… it's Adrian's, right?

Sam: He looked at his dad with a deep 'are you kidding me' frown

Andy: Nervous chuckle funny enough, I'm uh, pregnant too…

Sam: ……….

Andy: ………

Sam: ………

Andy: ……… Akin is sure it happened on Adrian's first wolf moon, but we couldn't detect it till about a month ago, probably cause my body was aware I'd have gotten an abortion. He sighed deep now it's too late, I'm just "lucky" that I haven't started showing yet he ran his fingers through his hair nervously I'm sorry to dump it on you like that, but no one else knows… I mean apart from Akin… I just haven't figured how to tell Adrian, yet…. if ever

Sam: You have to tell him, dad!

Andy: And lose him? He frowned softly maybe it's best to never say anything at all… keep things the way they are.

Sam: And then what when the kid grows up and looks like him?

Andy: ……… yeah…..

Sam: Yeah he grabbed his tooth brush, added tooth paste and stuck it in his mouth, brushing his teeth

Andy: I just don't want to lose him… fuck! I don't even know how to tell him, and even if there's the slightest chance he wouldn't lose his shit, he definitely will now when there's two of us! Mr. no kids is going to have two kids!

Sam: …….. 3 he mumbled with his mouth full of foam

Andy: ……. what?!?! Who else is pregna- Dalton?!?!

Sam: No he quickly spat in the sink I'm he sighed deep having twins.

Andy: ……….. FUCK!!! He quickly rushed to the kitchen, ripping the door open, grabbed a beer and was just about to open it as someone knocked Sam's door

Sam: He groaned from inside the bathroom

Andy: I'll tell them to fuck right off!!

Sam: No, dad he spat in the sink, quickly washing his tooth brush I'll handle it. He quickly left the bathroom and walked to the front door, opening it a bit hesitating this time, frowning questioning as outside there were no sign of anyone, then he suddenly noticed a basket on the ground…. with a small baby in it What the?! he looked around, there were no movements indicating a person had left, so he quickly ran out onto the road, no cars, nothing!?!

Andy: what's going on? He rushed to the door, only to spot the baby right away What the fuck?!? He quickly picked up the basket and got it into the living room, placing it securely on the couch, then he noticed a note

Sam: He shook his head and sniffed the air, but couldn't pick up any new scent, beside the baby, it was as if a ghost had dropped off the basket. He hurried back to the house and locked the door after himself, a thing he wouldn't usually do, but something inside him felt uneasy all of a sudden, and it wasn't the pregnancy this time. It was as if something dark suddenly hung thick over his house. A smell of death in the air. He frowned suspiciously, but brushed it off, for now the most important would be to find out what-

Andy: Uhmm

Sam: What? He quickly walked up to his dad

Andy: Uh yeah, there's a note…

Sam: A note?

Andy: Uh yeah, it's from Meena… she says the baby is yours and that she can't do it. She says she is your responsibility and to never contact her again.

Sam: What!?? he quickly grabbed the note and ripped it out of Andy's hand, reading it fast

Andy: …….

Sam: ……. fuck!

Andy: He nodded slow

Sam: He quickly picked up his phone, dialling his friend Meena's number, a friend he had had casual sex with in the past… twice. Her number is out of service he frowned as he put the phone back down, trying to process everything. Now there were 4 babies?! She didn't even leave a name?!? How am I going to take care of a pregnancy, AND a baby, AND get all that to fit with a child-phobic boyfriend?!

Andy: ….. I hate to suggest it again, but-

Sam: Dad, no!

Andy: Get very drunk then?!

Sam: Dad!

Andy: Rough sex with strangers?

Sam: ….. he couldn't help but chuckle

Andy: You wait a couple months and it wont seem like such a laughable idea when the pregnancy hormones take over!

Sam: He shook his head lightly I really can't wrap my head around that right now dad, I have to go find Meena and try to figure this one out, you can't just dump your baby on someone elses doorstep!

Andy: But she appears to be yours…

Sam: Regardless, dad. It's just not okay, I thought we were friends, yet I knew nothing about this baby, or her being pregnant for that matter?

Andy: When was the last time you even spoke to her? I mean, 9 months pregnancy and you didn't notice?

Sam: He lifted an eyebrow I'm not stupid if that's where we're heading?!

Andy: … no, I'm just saying-

Sam: I haven't seen her for about 11-12 months? And I haven't spoken with her for about 10 months maybe?

Andy: Real good friends you two were….

Sam: He frowned at his dad's sarcasm I've been busy.

Andy: ….

Sam: beside I'm not going to just believe a mystery baby is mine because of a handwritten letter, there are tests to be made. Proper ways of handling things he gestured at the basket this isn't it. I don't exactly have diapers or milk laying around either. He sighed deep So my first priority is to try to get a hold of Meena and get to the bottom of it all.

Andy: He nodded confirming what about the baby? Are you going to portal jump around with her?

Sam: No. I hate to ask but can you keep an eye on her for a while?

Andy: Yeah, sure, I might have a couple things in my car as well you can have, in case she stays. At least it could save your ass till you can get to a supermarket tomorrow.

Sam: He sighed heavy Thanks dad. I'll be back as soon as possible, I promise.

Andy: Take your time, it's okay, I'll stay as long as you need me to he smiled soft and sat down next to the basket At least she's sleeping for now.

Sam: He sighed softly call me if it gets to be too much.

Andy: It wont, please, go fix your life, it's honestly starting to look like mine! He chuckled hoarsely

Sam: He squinted his eyes but said nothing, just quickly grabbed his coat and headed to his bedroom where he would set up the portal for Meena's place.

Andy: So what's your name anyway? He looked at the sleeping baby I'm Andy btw… he reached a greeting hand into the basket Nice to meet you…. oh you don't give hand…. shy?…. he shrugged lightly that's alright, you shouldn't talk to strangers anyway.

[suzieb-fit]

Yesterday was a walk, tomorrow is a bike ride, so I'm happy spending today indoors.

Typical rainy, dull autumn day out there.

I'll keep active with my three workouts and a couple of household chores.

Plus every now and then I have started getting up to do a few calf raises, side steps or hamstring curls etc.

Just to prevent that mostly sedentary lifestyle killer!

My first workout was pure strength. A good one, too. I used both kettlebells and my little dumbbells.

I seem to do a lot of renegade rows. So I upped my weight for those. And I do them in the unilateral position. The opposite leg straight and lifted.

Bench pullovers are one of my favourite moves. Love how they feel on my whole upper body. And an added bonus for the full body to do them in a bridge position.

I wanted my frothy coffee after that, but decided to wait til later and keep my fast going til lunch. So I'm trying green tea with nutmeg and cinnamon. Tolerable, but nah. I have to finally accept I don't like hot drinks without milk, cream or as a bulletproof!

Speaking of which, I tried one of those first thing, just using coconut oil. Took a bit longer for a symptom flare up, but I did still get one. Never mind. Worth a try.

[chaoticsoft]

I Turn 30 in 6 Days. Here Are Some of the Things I've Learned:

Cut your kitchen sponge in half. They really don't need to be as big as they are to get the job done and it makes the pack last way longer.

Cheap(er) shampoo, expensive conditioner.

If you can afford their care, a little animal companion does wonders for your mental health.

Learning languages is a cool and sexy way to keep your brain malleable.

Speaking of malleability, stretch your muscles every single day. Every. Day.

If you are someone who gets a period, menstrual cups are something that's improved my quality of life so much. Reusable, cloth pads and period underwear are also game-changers. Good for the environment and you save so much money.

If a job hires you on the spot, like immediately, barely asking you a single question about your qualifications, there's a 97% chance that job is going to be a disaster.

In a similar vein, if someone gets very, very serious about you/tells you they want to marry you after barely dating for like a month, that is a red flag. While there are cases where it can work out, 9 times out of 10, that person is not in love with you (How can they be? They don't know you yet), and is simply desperate to be with someone, anyone, doesn't really matter who. Not a healthy foundation for a relationship.

Protein helps a hangover. Everyone finds their own little things that work for them, but my personal favorite remedy is steak & eggs.

Speaking of alcohol, I am of the "harm reduction" school of thought. If you're going to drink (or do drugs, for that matter), do it at home where you are safe and around people you trust. Use as little as possible and take tolerance breaks.

Cooking doesn't have to be complicated. If you can read, you can do it. The easiest thing ever is soups. A good rule of thumb is to start with something from the allium family (leeks, garlic, shallots, onions), something to add bulk like your potato of choice, carrots, butternut squash, then something leafy for texture like kale, bok choy, cabbage. Nutritional yeast can add a wonderful flavor.

Try and have at least one healthy, easy meal you can make when you're in a bad headspace. My go-to is lentils cooked in vegetable broth eaten over microwaveable rice. Or I throw a bag of frozen vegetables and a can of coconut milk into a pan with turmeric, ginger powder, cayenne pepper, coriander, etc.-- Bam, vegetable curry in like 10ish minutes.

Sex toys are tools to achieve or enhance sexual pleasure. A partner who is threatened by a vibrator ain't shit lol.

If you, like me, were never taught how to self-soothe (regulate your negative emotions/calm yourself down without spiraling into darkness), a piece of advice my therapist offered me was to speak to myself as though I'm a very small, frightened child. To comfort a child that's crying, I would not say, "get over it, you dumb bitch" or whatever cruel, negative self-talk I tend to throw at myself. Instead, I would speak calmly to that child. I would gently soothe them, reassuring them that they are safe. I do this with myself all the time now, calling myself "sweetheart," assuring myself that everything will be okay. It has not replaced the mean, negative voice in my head, but it does always challenge and often override it.

Your healing does not depend on those who hurt you being sorry.

If you are the marrying kind, marry the one who feels like safety, who you look at and your heart thinks, "Home." Marry the one who, when they tell you everything will be alright, you can believe them. It helps, also, to find your best and deepest friendship in your mate. To genuinely like as well as love them.

[lawvno]

Thanks for the tag, I haven't been tagged in this kind of things for so long XD Egg: I don't like eggs! scambled on something is not bad though. And Ramen Eggs!! Steak: the second it is too chewy, i'm out. Milk: I'd drink cold milk right now

Alcohol: Coconut rum!

Warm drink: Cappuccino ☕

Tag: @auxiliarydetective only if you want

[coridallasmultipass]

Made lobster curry. Overcooked lobster curry. Happy new year!

[Description of cleaning a lobster for meat below:]

So, I wanted lobster last new year, but things didn't work out for me to make it. (Tbh, I've wanted lobster for new year since I saw ppl do that in a movie once. Sounds fancy.) I fought my back and made it this year, to go in curry, (since I wasn't sure I was gonna like the taste, and curry is a safe strong flavour lmao). I'm a chicken when it comes to eating new food, but I like shrimp, so it can't be that different, right?

I defrost the extremely fishy (not bad) smelling pre-cooked lobster in cold water for like 1.5 hours. I thought I had bought a raw one! Damn it, because I can't season a cooked one (I tried, though, once I got the meat out). I always buy raw shrimp with shells so I can clean them myself, to my liking, so this was a setback to me. I had to use the handles of a garlic squeezer thing to break the claws, since I've never had or cooked lobster and don't have seafood tools. I'm very weirded out by that point, and also poking myself on the spines. And also covered in defrosted lobster water juice that squirted and leaked everywhere. Ugh.

Then I break off the tail from the thorax, and find a ton of RED. RED RED RED EVERYWHERE. THE VIDEOS I WATCHED ON HOW TO CLEAN A LOBSTER DIDN'T PREPARE ME FOR FINDING EGGS IN A FEMALE ONE. MAN, I WAS NOT MENTALLY READY TO BE SAMPLING LOBSTER EGGS, WHEN I WAS ALREADY SCARED OF THE LOBSTER.

I finished cleaning it, and tried a little of the eggs, and it doesn't taste like much, but cleaning the lobster mixed the eggs with tomalley and I did NOT want to try that, especially if it's already dubiously edible. I only got like a clean spoonful or two of eggs to put in the dish, just out of not wanting to waste edible parts.

The curry cooked down really well and I cooked the eggplant perfectly, and that all tasted great. Then I stirred in the seasoned, pre-cooked lobster meat, and fresh parsley and turned off the heat and left the pot covered while I cleaned the kitchen. Because again, the lobster defrost water got EVERYWHERE.

Apparently, not immediately eating it meant that the lobster got cooked WAY over. Now... I have cooked the absolute FUCK out of shrimp in the past (and microwaved leftovers of fuck-cooked shrimp) and it has NEVER been as chewy as this lobster is. I cut it in small pieces, but it's like chewing gum.

Like, fuck. And for the effort it takes to clean? Fuck you, I'm only going for shrimp from now on, lol. Too bad I still have one more frozen lobster I need to cook in the freezer, ughhh.

Oh, as I'm typing this, I just realized I forgot to add the coconut milk to the curry LMAO. I kept looking at it while it was cooking (no recipe, just habit), and wondering why I felt like I was missing liquid, and kept putting broth. Ah well. The chewy lobster kinda ruined it anyway, so better that I didn't make more of this to eat.

The taste of the lobster is okay, but it's way fishier than I'd like. Like shrimp tastes like buttery chicken with only a seafood smell to me. This tastes of like... fish. Like when I was pulling the meat out, I was like, oh this smells like regular white fish meat. And that's what it tastes like. If only it had the consistency of fish, it'd be fine.

It took me so fucking long to make this shit. My back is killing me. I was almost in tears when I finally got to my room to sit on a comfy seat. So that's where I'm at.

Happy new year, guys.

(Oh, the elderflower lemonade fucks, it's soooo worth the $5 even for this small bottle. I was gonna get a fancy glass, but I'm in too much pain to locate one. And yeah, it's still before 7pm for me, but I'm gonna have my teeth aligners in again once I finish eating, so better to drink it with lunch-dinner.)