#Not even written to be annoying đ
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wowww, you hate this character cus they did something bad, no way... you hate this character cus they have a superiority complex, wowwww... that is sooo interesting and bold of you to say, please go on tell me more *frantically putting my t-shirts that say I LOVE WHEN CHARACTERS ARE ANNOYING FUCKHEADS and I LOVE VILLAINS and I LOVE STUDYING CHARACTERS UNDER A MICROSCOPE BECAUSE ITS INTERESTING back in my bag
#talk#something about people who don't like villains really get me i have to say#like i guess these people just read things more personally than i do but like#it's so easy for me to step back from a characters actions to appreciate them as a character i don't get it#but i mean i guess that's the intended emotional reaction for a lot of stuff...#it just feels kind of juvenile or like really divorced from the perspective of a writer/artist#like we think about these things completely differently#AND WHAT PROMPTED THIS WASNT EVEN ABOUT VILLAINS EITHER IT WAS JUST REGULAR CHARACTERS#Not even written to be annoying đ
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I havenât really seen anyone talk about this yet so thereâs a possibility I could be the only one but I hate Chevreuse and how they wrote her
Even if I ignore the fact that sheâs a cop and most cop-like characters piss me off anyways, within the context of the region sheâs apart of, sheâs just plain boring. As it stands we already have a good handful of characters in the game, a lot of them from Fontaine already, with the exact same motivations and high held personal morals; the law is there for a reason, if people enact revenge and take what they think is just and right All The Time, then there would be chaos and unfair violence everywhere. And from a real life ethical lens it WOULD be really chaotic if anyone, anywhere at anytime could take their views of justice into their own hands.
but thatâs the thing!! kind of like how it is In the real world, Fontaine is not a wholly just and fair nation (e.g. the Entirety of the Fortress of Meropide, the trafficking and various other crimes that constantly happen within the nobility of Fontaine and the fact that it has yet to be thoroughly investigated/solved and continues to happen, the extreme economic and social juxtaposition between the court of Fontaine and its underground Fleuve Cendre area and Poisson) And it really sucks that the game fails to admit that or acknowledge it because then you have characters who they Want you to believe are doing the right thing and fighting for the right causes, but it winds up feeling meaningless when what theyâre fighting for is the law of Fontaine.
Chevreuse wouldâve been an Infinitely more interesting and compelling character if her passion for justice wasnât rooted in upholding the law and order of the nation, but rather what justice means for individuals. How the injustice and discrimination happening in that nation breeds peopleâs want for revenge and justice outside of the law.
And yeah I get that they wanted another character who fights against evil and is unwavering in her beliefs of whatâs right in the very conventional and legal way, but I find it really funny that Chevreuse herself says what makes the argument for her character being boring In the same event quest; when asked about possibly changing the ending and meaning of the Two Musketeers, she says she wants to keep the ending the way that it is because fiction exists in a realm separate from that of reality, where things like the morals of whatâs just and unjust can be explored. and like!! thatâs itâs!!! Iâm literally sitting here playing a Fictional game that has the opportunity to showcase just how fascinating it can be to talk about those kind of things in a fantasy setting where your main player character has literally Killed mostly innocent human people before because they betrayed someone they cared about deeply. but whatever. WHATEVER!!!
#this is such a mess and went WAY all over the place but i needed to type out what iâve been feeling while playing roses and muskets#i donât even really care about chevreuse enough to want her to be a better written character#i just got so annoyed with her that it was all i could think about đđđđ#the cutscene they showed in the event was REALLY cool#but it couldâve been so much cooler if she had just let girlboss veronique do her thing#âyou can keep your money and you can go to hell wouldâve been SUCH A HARD LINE!!!#like sorry sorry sorry i do not care about some rich aristocrat who murdered an innocent woman because he wanted to stay rich#that line and she immediately moves to the side and walks out of the building to let veronique kill him THATS fucking hard#but again WHATEVERRRRRR#ughhh cops
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just hit 50k in cryptids wip :â)
#chugging along but the book is getting WRITTEN#I have 12.5 scene left btwâŠ#technically in my outline Iâm a little past the halfway point#but I think I have ~30k left to go đđ#itâs always so funny when you reach a milestone like this bc despite the agony of writing the thing you get all tingly and sappy like..#oh yeah :â) I wrote all that!! Iâve made it so far!!#ive got weird feelings abt this story but i am quite proud#itâs also been a while since Iâve progressed this far with an original project and ngl.. I really missed this feeling đ#creating is cool!!! we love writing!!!#and just you wait until I reach the end. Iâm gonna be so annoying about it (<â will most likely feel too shy to even say anything)#I wrote 5 scenes in like.. twoish weeks. which doesnât seem like a lot but with the little time I have it honestly is#so if Iâm consistent I could finish this draft in ~4 weeks???? đđđ like.#in a month I could have another book done. thatâd be crazy.#anyway. yeehaw :D#blahblahbills#lol I know this means nothing to most people bc I literally never share anything abt this project lol#ew I used lol at the beginning and end of that tag but I donât feel like retyping all that đ
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i hate kevin ball. iâm disinterested in veronica fisher. they fucked up svetlanaâs whole character by creating the throuple. the end.
#kev and v are funny as side characters but i really canât stand them as main characters and iâm sorry#i feel like once they hit that rough patch in s5 i lost interest#and they had a bit too much screentime#every single season they have like 11 storylines that barely link together and are just for laughs and to make the episode longer#like if you watch shameless without their scenes (that donât have the gallaghers/milkoviches) you arent missing much#i just dont understand how some people are like THESE ARE THE BEST CHARACTERS and then theyâre the least complex and most boring#(kev and v not svetlana)#svetlana was well-written and interesting and easily in my top 10 but the throuple happens and i just canât#iâm not bothered or bored or even annoyed by her itâs just they were so stuck with her character#like her whole ordeal with mickey ended (or just noel left) and they were really at a loss#so they just literally added her into kev and vâs relationship because those two are the characters they also donât know what to do with#itâs like the island of misfit toys or whatever itâs called from rudolph the red-nosed reindeerđđ#i love shanola and isidora so iâm glad they got screentime#but itâs just like⊠why#ok thatâs the end of my rant that nobody asked for#shameless#kevin ball#veronica fisher#svetlana yevgenivna
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another dump cos i sorta kinda like these...friends and family
#dino.png#cyberpunk 2077#myV: lĂ©o-vincent valentine#that name so annoying to type out#random lĂ©o-vin infodump of the day: he (and...only heđ) doesnt see the way hes cuddling up w panam as romantic. if they ever were to#i mean...he sortakinda romanced her. didnt get to basilisk yet. but he didnt do any of the romance options until she made a move#and even then...lĂ©o-vin is...đż. he just goes along w whatever ppl want sometimes.#this is sometimes. also in general...terrible at romance he has no healthy perception of it soo...!#he genuinely cares for panam a deeply but like. his borderline unhealthy attachment to johnny is not helping anything#he often lets ppl decide their relationship with him bc he doesnt make any efforts to like maintain relationships w ppl that much#mama welles knows this well but he always stumbles into el coyotĂ© at least....once every few months#if she calls he will come tho lol#in canon timeline (so dying) he would completely distance himself in hopes that his death doesnt sadden her (this is stupid) (it still will#so johnny being physically incapable of leaving him...tho it was invoulantarily he weasled his way in like jackie did#nd V ultimately does not want to be alone. so....ya!#AND SCENE#anyways. i have so much lore written for him its so fun. highly recommended.
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The sleepover scene always breaks my heart đ literally me at 12
#ik Marcy was being like annoying and talking about shit anne and sasha didn't care about#but it still hurts when sasha tells her to her face that she doesn't care đđ#i remember being told all the time that I shouldn't talk about things other people don't care about#or about uncommon interests#so I started to lie about the things I liked. whenever someone asked me what music I liked I said ''anything'' as if I didn't stay up at#4 am reading obscure lore from a conceptual album about a family of necromancers in 19th century north america written by a florida man#same with books and movies and all i just said I watched disney channel or something#even if my true obsession was stephen king or communist literature or just. late night wikipedia rabbit holes#like on time you learn to stop talking about people irl about your stuff and put it alllll on a tumblr blog#but at 13 you're so embarrassingly passionate and excited that you can't keep your mouth shut#and you're humilliating yourself and commiting social suicide because it takes you just a little bit longer than your pears to learn how to#act normal and read the room and stuff#wow marcy really do be like me fr#my posts#oh well that's what college is for thankfully! you get to be surrounded by people who share at least one (1) obsession with you now!#so you can make friends and meet up and just yap yap yap about mid century criticism of linguistic relativism#or functional-structuralist analysis of myths#i still do wanna find friends to talk about dragons about tho
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I hate stsg shippers sm theyâre so annoying talking about some âGojo wanted to be with Getou again and he got his wish đ„ș...â Likeajajakk they like anything just as long as someone is topping and bottoming bro
#I hate when ppl just consume shit and look at every critical thing that happens in the media they like with a shippers lease itâs so#annoying because they always end up stripping away the context of entire works of fiction and scenes like oh brother#and the only ppl who seem to be satisfied with the very rushed and poorly written outcome were the shippers because brainrot and like#obviously sukuna fans đ⊠like#I can understand the sukuna fans more then the shippers because it makes sense and I canât even lie Gojo fans have been so hard and nasty#towards sukuna fans for like months so lmfaoo#I have to take this L as a gojohoe⊠I love sukuna too but obviously gege is a fucking idiot and doesnât respect his own characters enough to#do right by them narratively#rambling#jjk spoilers
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nah star trek picard really looked me in the face and told me to take my gay ass to hell lmao. like youâre telling me after making it through a season while buckling under grief and immense trauma they choose each other, get one onscreen kiss and dassit? the most integral and stable parts (maybe. they couldâve broken up the second they left guinans bar in the s2 finale for all i know) of their entire relationship happened between seasons? off-fucking-screen?!? yeah this show ainât fucking serious. at all. they were together (how long? no one fucking knows!) and i ainât even get to see that? sick and twisted lmao. didnât even try. didnât even pretend to try. teased seven and raffiâs relationship for a season and a half only to wrap shit up in 30 secondsâwhat happened to privacy. why was worf even in that scene like he couldnât take a step back? why were they trying to present it as a jokey joke too like star trek picard whatâs funny? nothing exactly. they really said here damn scram lol?????
i just. an offscreen breakup that is still a mystery because ????? because nothing. itâs not like they care so why not just get it over with in episode 1? what was the goal here? a breakup which was telegraphed yet dragged out for no discernible reason. biggest waste of time since idk when. and all this fast tracking time jumping shit they keep doing with their relationship is so transparent and boring. just zero investment. why are they allergic to telling coherent stories! and also joy!
god. what even is there to say about this bullshit that hasnât been said. whatâs the takeaway here? what was gained.
#seven x raffi#worf chiming in was my limit like sir pls go somewhere lmaooo#im def in my feelings but playing that moment off as a joke was so annoying#this showâŠâŠ#star trek picard a tek mi fi eediat#played in my face full jungle gym đ#now i did giggle when worf said he was practicing deception but like hysterically#bc i couldnât believe my mf eyes and ears#theyâre handling this relationship so badly they do not give a fuck#they really couldâve kept it and i hate that thatâs where i am now.#and if they possibly work their way back to each other itâs like#why are we revisiting season two?#another season finale kiss is NOT relationship progression#can they just be happy for a fkn minute like why isnt that okay!#god#wouldnât even have been opposed to actually seeing them end things#w both of their personalities it wouldâve been amazing (or reaaaaally badly written but still)#just nothing.#quite disgusting actually#r7
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non-zero chance that the 3-parter planned for upcoming pointy objects arc becomes a tetralogyâŠâŠâŠâŠ
#pointy objects#its so fucking long already. like 4 bullet points on my LONG ASS outline for this chapter ended up 3.3k words đđ#and im not even nearly done yet oh my god this was meant to be the short Opener to the next few chapters . help#oh god but that will be so ANNOYING grrr rah i will figure it out once i have the whole thing written up
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When will people learn to read carrds đ
#or even bio đ#not a big deal but sometimes I get dms and I get annoyed kfbdjdbd#and I think they found me rude but I just said I didnât want anyone I am not mutuals with dm me unless itâs important#(like they canât tell me for everyone to see)#i remember an anon send me an ask when I complain once being like ââno on remember every twââ and I was like I never mention tw ???????#i was complaining about this kid that kept following me even though I soft block them even if it was written no minor in my carrd#they followed so many time I had to block them#yes it bothers me when people donât tw some things cause I have less commun phobia#but Iâm not the Center of the world I donât expect everyone to remember everything#but itâs written and itâs nice if moots remembers !#i block i would have usually block them on sight but I was curious#they reblogged a gaza post so i was like in case itâs related to that#and they started with Hello Alex like they new me ????? I personally never adress someone I never talk to by their name ???? it feels creepy#even if itâs in my bio do you get what I mean ? ckdbjxbdjd#not a big deal but I still got me ??????#maybe Iâm just too anxious and use to weird people dming me#alex.txt
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c***unitytwt, and specifically a**d fans, are getting on my NERVES. i made a pretty flippant joke that theyre never explicit abt him being autistic despite how everyone talks abt him, and you would think i waterboarded three puppies w their reactions.
#rant#i guess#for context i was qrting a post abt how charlie and **** have the same amt of lines abt their autism#which started bcuz c***twt was arguing charlie wasnt âactually autisticâ so heâd lose a poll LMAO#but anyway#my point was that the show never ACTUALLY referred to **** as autistic#(excluding the time j*ff called him autistic as an insult or whatev before **** was actually written as such)#but ppl r all mad bcuz its heavily implied and not all autistic ppl need to say theyre autistic outloud#and likeâŠ. yeah true! <- thinks charlie is autistic#but they still never say it explicitlyđ? im still right#he can be written as autistic without it ever being explicitly stated. these arent conflicting statements#i never said he WASNT autistic but ppl r still calling me a weirdo and media illiterateđ#sry for pointing out a fact!! iâll never do it again lmao#its doubly annoying since i censored any words to do w that godforesaken show cuz i KNEW this was gonna happen#im not even engaging bcuz everyone is either deliberately misconstruing my point; GENUINELY NOT GETTING WHAT I WAS SAYING; or still in hs#btw hate the fact i cant put commas in tags. annoyingn asf#also someone said **** is better rep bcuz he likes tv and charlie is bad rep bcuz he drinks paint#which is SOOOOOOO fucking funny i wish i could shit like that without a trace of irony#how r these ppl real
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I understand people wanting like their favourite two character to interact and that Kim and Vegas can be similar but I'm mainly talking about the fact that most of the time I've seen people make them friends they are friends because Kim hates his brothers Which to me just feels so far from who Kim is, like protecting Kinn cause he thinks Porsche is a spy or whatever is literally Kim's motivation for doing things for like half the show until it changes to he wants to protect Chay as well. Like yes Kim is clearly distant and not close with his brothers but he also clearly cares about them, even if Kinn says they haven't seen each other in ages, Kim still feels comfortable he can call and ask Kinn what is happening at the main family after Chay gets kidnapped
And if Kim hates his brothers so much why would he like Vegas?
I'm not really a big Vegas fan so I don't really pay attention to him, but sometimes people write that Vegas sees Kim doesn't have anyone cause he is distant from his brothers and adopts him as a younger brother and that just ??? I keep saying Kim is raised to hate the minor family but like Kim doesn't really interact with the mafia anyway, but Vegas? Vegas has a deep rivalry thing going on with Kinn, Vegas clearly hates both Kinn and Tankhun, why would his feelings to Kim be different? And even if they were I think Kim would hate Vegas on the fact both his brothers hate Vegas alone. (Even if Kim hated his brothers I think he'd still hate Vegas based on this) 'Vegas sees Kim as younger brother in trouble and wants to help him!' Vegas did not give a fuck about Chay being in trouble? The younger brother of someone he was romantically interested in? I really don't think he cares about Kim being a younger brother. Vegas clearly loves Macau but I don't think he has that whole 'adopt stray younger brothers' vibes that Porsche has.
Idk if this is a controversial opinion but I low-key hate when people make Kim and his brothers distant but decide Kim is besties with Vegas at the same time
Kim had no problem walking into a random warehouse and immediately shooting at Vegas on sight
Like idc if it's just that Vegas and Kim are friends/friendly but it's when they specifically add that they are friends and Kim hates his brothers/does not interact with them but he kept in touch with Vegas?
#i dont really care about vegas so ive never written about him but i have written about kim hating his brothers before#i just dont understand why people think the second Kim is away from his brothers he will start treating Vegas like one#or even just kim will start trusting vegas more than he has ever trusted Kinn or tankhun#if kim is ignoring and distant from his brother cause of the mafia he is not going to vegas (regardless of if vegas is or isnt in the mafia#idk why this annoys me so much but it does đ#yes you can make Kim hate his brothers#yes you can make kim and vegas friends#this is just a thing i personally hate#kim theerapanyakul#vegas theerapanyakul
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#sees literally just name of my notp#gets mad#gets mad that im mad#the cycle continues#me @ my brain: why THE FUCK of all the things you could get so angry about you choose this#theyre not even real đđđ#every once in a while when i come across a bkak author whose writing i enjoy ill check their other fics and theyve written for the notp#and that sucks bc it's not the fact that theyve written for it that pisses me off (mostly) but the fact that there is quality#content for the pairing i cant enjoy or show support for#i want to own up to being a hater but i cant it's literally just me being a clown!!!#anyone have anything like this? i honestly just need validation rn im so annoyed#zzxya speaks
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my interests always regress so bad during finals so iâve been reading the rest of the simon snow series after rereading carry on and its kind of just bad (shocker). iâm gonna read the third book though because i really want to know whether they decide racism is good or bad đ€š
#the vampire attitude is crazyâŠ. âthis whole race is inherently evil and deserves death no matter whatâ#except for the main character whoâs a vampire because (????)#i thought the introduction of lam(b?) was soooo interesting and that they would finally discuss their radical vampire biases but nope#heâs also evil and deserves death#baz learning about vampires and his own body after so long being alone and confused and scared was so touching and resonantâŠ.#to turn around and still be like No all vampires should be mass murdered is CRAZY.#why are vampires the one race that they canât accept has moral nuance đ#even after lam revealed he was also turned against his will like baz even#anyway. book 2 was so boring and weird. simon is so annoyingâŠ.. and agatha is sort of just boring. baz penelope and shepherd sweep#also re: agatha like dude she shouldâve been written out đ#her storyline was so real and fascinating in the first book. to say âno obviously she canât leave magic behind how silly of herâ#is so reductiveâŠâŠ write her the hell out already đ#ss#and on top of that thereâs the whole party talking about how baz is so embarrassed to just exist and be healthy as a vampire#even in front of his loved ones and like. nobody gives a fuck (?). theyre just like phew good thing we killed all those disgusting vampires#crazyâŠâŠâŠ.#baz is kind of eh in the first book but hes so wonderful in book twoâŠâŠ
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i just listened to sabrina's new album and oh my god the song slim pickins is such a song that was written from daydreaming about lumberjack!logan, oh and the recent fic that you reblogged was just so yummy and perfect for that song especially the lyrics "a boy who's jacked and nice" like god having to settle down for less because nobody can be him đđđ need him expeditiously im afraid
it's slim pickins
lumberjack!logan howlett x fem!reader
cw: yearning!! fluff, tiny nsfw conversation (nothing graphic)
a/n: this request couldn't have come in at a better time because i'm seeing sabrina on opening night of her tour tomorrow night!! <3
masterlist
"am i just destined to be alone forever?"
another friday night in the hole in the wall bar outside of town. another date gone horribly wrong. your question hangs heavy in the air as you gossip to your best friend who's bartending tonight.
"you keep picking douche bags." she answers without missing a beat.
"well, that's fuckin' rude." you slur slightly, sipping on your third fruity drink tonight.
"well, it's fuckin' true." she smiles, looking over your shoulder at a group of men that walked in. "why don't you go talk to one of them? they look hot."
you spin around in your stool to see a group of lumberjack workers. these were the men that you worked with, you can't flirt with them.
"i work with those guys!" you hiss.
"sooo...?" she smirks.
both of you quickly end the conversation with the five guys approach the bar. the last thing you needed was for these guys to see the desperate and pathetic look on your face. quickly, you rummage through your purse for some cash to put down.
"what are you doing here, doll face?" a familiar voice asks.
you look up and see the most handsome of the men, in front of you; logan. twice your size, buff, toned, tan... god, you had such a crush on him. never in a million years would you go after him though, he's too good to want a girl like you. you were just a friend. he make small talk with you, laughed at your jokes, calls you little nicknames, and refills the coffee pot for you but thats what friends do, right?
"oh... um, i'm just-"
"she's been sitting here moaning and bitching to me all night about her horrible date." your best friend smiles then introduces herself to logan with a handshake.
"thanks asshole." you mumble under your breath at her, making logan chuckle.
"tough night?" he asks, looking down at you in a way that makes heat rises up your face.
"kinda, but i'll save you all the gory details." you admit, sliding off the tall stool a little ungracefully. "have a good night, logan."
"wait, doll face." he says, grabbing your arm to balance you. "wanna talk about it? i'm sure your friend here is busy."
the alcohol let him take you to one of the booths. all the other men noticed logan and you sitting together, definitely making mental notes to tease you both on monday.
"so, what's on your mind?" logan asks, taking a swig of his beer.
"it's nothing really..." your mouth says one thing but your phone says another; practically buzzing off the table.
"you sure?" he raises a brow.
"uh... yeah?" you sound confused as you peak at the notification. an annoyed groan falls from your lips as you slam the phone back down and sink into the booth. "why? why? why?"
"why what?" he squints.
"be honest, do i have dumbass written on my forehead?" you sigh, hazily looking over at logan. the question threw him off guard; unsure if you're joking or not.
"no." he answers.
" well, i sure feel like one. every guy i've gone out with is either the most obnoxious asshole i've ever met who's still hung up on his ex or he's absolutely perfect but he's just not ready for a commitment right now? what the fuck does that even mean?"
all of your drunk rambling surprised logan. at work, he's only seen your shy personality as you scribble down numbers and log them into spreadsheets. this was a completely different side of you.
"i know what you're thinking, 'why not just try dating a woman?'. well, i fucking would if this town wasn't stuck in the 50's, except the men aren't going to war in order to get away from you, instead they just run back in between their ex's thighs and pull that 'it's not you, it's me' bullshit."
it was getting harder for logan not to crack at your silly yet, adorable expressions as you rant.
"and the worst part is that they can't even get a woman to orgasm." you say a little quieter. logan stores that quote in his pocket for another time. "a few weeks ago, i literally had a man in my bed who didn't know the difference between their, there, and they're! i don't know who's stupider, him for not knowing or me for letting him give me the worst head in my life."
if you were even a little sober, this would be mortifying. sitting in front of your work crush and spilling pathetic details of your love life to him. if you were even a little sober, you would have notice his eyes turn dark and lustful under the dim bar lighting. logan couldnât fathom that you were having trouble in your love life.
"sounds like it's slim pickins out there."
"you have no idea." you sigh.
"if it makes you feel any better, i don't think that you're stupid."
"you're just saying that to be polite. trust me, everyone thinks i'm an idiot for taking these guys back every time. im just like my mom, my sisters, my friends, and every other girl i know. we make up excuses for their shitty behavior because we are afraid to be alone."
logan could see tears forming in your waterline, about to roll down your cheek. it hurt him to see you so heartbroken over these losers. everyday at work, you came in like a ray of fucking sunshine. you didn't deserve to be treated like this.
"it's not your fault that those asshole don't know how to treat a woman." he sighs, leaning forward in an attempt to comfort you.
"i know, i know..." your voice was cracking and you didn't want logan to see you so vulnerable. suddenly, you rise from the booth. "thanks for listening, logan."
"where do you think you're going, doll face?" he asks, following you out the door.
"should head home." you mumble, pulling up the number of a car service about twenty minutes out.
"let me give you a ride home." he offers. "you've been drinking too much."
it's late, you're exhausted and heartbroken so, you let him help you into his truck. it's kinda old but full of character, like logan.
"what's going on in that pretty head of yours?" logan asks, breaking the silence in the car. "still sad?"
you shrug. "think i'm just going to become a nun."
he tried, he really did, but he had to laugh.
"sweetheart, there's no need to become a nun."
"well, i'm never going to find the man i'm looking for so, might as well join the sisterhood."
"what are you looking for in this dream man?"
logan's question has your eyes wondering over to where his left hand sets on the wheel and his right on thigh. the images of what his hands could do flood your fuzzy mind.
"j-just a good guy who's um, who's kind, jacked... respectful, good with his hands...."
it was shameless, your staring that is. logan worried you might get drool on the car seat, not that he would mind.
"hm... those seem like simple requirements there."
"apparently not." you giggle. "it's fine, though. i'm sure the nuns will be friendly."
"still thinking about joining the 'sisterhood'?" he asks, pulling up to your drive way.
"maybe... i'll give it twenty-four hours and if he doesn't come knocking on my door, i'll just buy a chasity belt and go off the grid with the nuns." your smile warmed his cold bitter heart. "thanks for the ride, lo. i'll see you monday."
as logan watches you fumble with your keys and make your way inside, he fights an internal battle over his feelings. he has had a crush on you since the day the two of you first met. by the end of the week, you had baked him some cupcakes, babbling about how you do this for all the new employees, which was far from the truth he later learned.
you captured his heart. even when he tried to burry his feelings for you, when logan looked at you, his world stood still for a moment. he looked forward to all your silly jokes in the break room or the ridiculous gossip you would tell him when he lingered outside of your office door. he couldn't let you slip away into the arms of another asshole who didn't deserve you.
before logan could comprehend what he was doing, his feet lead him up to your door, knocking twice. the wooden door opened and he knew he made the right decision.
there you were in your light blue and grey plaid pajamas with a cupcake in your hand and vanilla frosting on your bottom lip. logan had never seen you look prettier.
"hey? did i leave something in theâ"
in the blink of an eye, loganâs hands reach up to caress your jaw, leaning in until his mouth engulfs yours. the taste of vanilla and alcohol surrounded both of you. forgetting the cupcake in your hand, dropping it to reach up and pull logan closer. kissing him was like drinking a glass of wine after a long day. no more stress or anxiety over anyone elseâs bullshit. the two of you gasp against each others lips, catching your breath.
âi could be the good guy, you know?â logan pants, now forever addicted to your taste. âi could be the good guy for you.â
your heart fluttered as you stared up at his pretty hazel eyes, twirling a piece of his hair around your finger. this had to be a very realistic dream, thats the only answer to this.
âyou would do that for me, logan?â your delicate voice could bring him to his knees, worshiping the ground you walk on.
âi would do anything for you, honey.â he whispers, leaning back in to kiss you again. maybe your dream guy wasn't as far away as you thought?
#logan howlett x reader#wolverine x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#logan howlett smut#wolverine smut#deadpool and wolverine#hugh jackman wolverine#wolverine#wolverine angst#logan howlett angst#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett fanfiction#logan x reader#logan wolverine#old man logan#old man logan x reader#wolverine fluff#wolverine one shot#wolverine x oc#wolverine x you#x men comics#x reader#x men#marvel cinematic universe#marvel#mcu#marvel mcu#lumberjack!logan#hugh jackman
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THE LOVE PROGNOSIS, pt. 2 â JJK (m.)
for as long as you can remember, youâve always been a hopeless romantic.
the girl whoâs always dreamt of cheesy encounters with her soulmate, grand love declarations, and a cute little beach wedding to boot. but reality pretty much slaps you hard right on the face, because love, unfortunately, doesnât come grand â itâs simple and itâs quiet, but it is quite painful, especially when the love that youâve been seeking for all your adult life has just been right under your nose all this time.
PAIRING jungkook x female reader // mingyu x female reader
GENRE r18+ (angst, fluff, smut) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!
CHAPTER WORD COUNT 27.5k
CHAPTER WARNINGS/MISC medical!au, roommates!au, surgeon!jk, surgeon!reader (they are both 4th year residents and are co-workers), corporate lawyer!mingyu, oc and jk are bffs since med school but their love language is fighting each other <3, jk and mingyu are bffs during undergrad, hopeless romantic!oc. shirtless jk in almost every scene ijbol he needs to get locked up, jk thigh tattoo đ a dash of sexual themes (ie: making out, grinding) and violence, this is pretty much MED SCHOOL LORE GALORE bcs boy, was there so much history mentioned here, 3/4 of this is in jk pov, so ladies.... prepare yourselves đ€so much fluff, and we counter that with not major but not minor either ANGST, so many conversations and dialogues in this one lol, this hopefully offers every answer youre looking for from part one, when ur done reading the chapter this is how the keyring looks like
NOTES hi!! this chapter was supposed to be longer but i was like.. fuck that đ its getting too long. anyway. hope u guys enjoy this one!! this is my most favorite thing ive ever written i think n im weirdly very proud of this one idk. scream into my inbox and the reply section if u have #thoughtss đđ [ important: pls make sure to read the note below ]
[ TLP MOODBOARD ] // [ SPOTIFY PLAYLIST ]
SERIES MASTERLIST | MAIN MASTERLIST
You take your sweet time trying to right your wrongs.
After that day, you were the one to initiate a call with Mingyu which he answered thankfully (you were a little skeptical about him calling you that night). You went over to his place after your shift, apologizing to him for lying about your roommate situation. Admittedly, Mingyu still doesnât seem to be wholly okay with it â but he doesnât really say anything more about it. He kissed you better that night, his lips making you forget all about the stress that youâve went through for the day, convincing you to stay over.
The night bled into two when he said he couldnât let you go. Mingyu was persistent and you were unwilling to go in the first place. Partly because who didnât want to spend more time with their significant other? But itâs also because of a certain someone that is no other than Jeon Jungkook.
Those two nights are going on four â which means that youâve been avoiding Jungkook for the past three days now.
It doesnât seem like a difficult task though because Jungkook seems to be doing the same. That was your hunch. He replies to you with dry-ass âokayâs when you text him about not going home because youâre staying at Mingyuâs. Nothing more, and nothing less.
Which is unusual of him. Sure, in your almost decade-long friendship, youâve fought a bunch of times. But it usually gets resolved in a day or two. And Jungkook wasnât ever cold like he is right now.
See, the regular Jungkook would find you anywhere on your floor at the hospital just to annoy you. When your time allows it, you eat together with your friends at lunch.
But now, he seems to always have something to do â which, okay, fair. Heâs a surgeon, after all. But he doesnât even spare you a glance whenever you two meet halfway in the hallways. Yesterday, you coincidentally scrubbed in together for the same surgery but he did not say a word to you other than, âScalpelâ.
The rest of your friends are already asking about it. Doyeon told you he had lunch with Jungkook this afternoon, but when she mentioned that maybe you were free to go with them, Jungkook suddenly had to look over a patientâs chart.
Itâs not just a hunch anymore. He really is avoiding you.
And to be honest, youâre tired of the whole pussyfooting around. Heâs being childish â and youâll be the better person to come and talk to him about it. Granted, youâre three days late. But at least youâre doing it.
You texted Mingyu earlier this afternoon that youâre coming home to your apartment tonight. He was bummed about it, you could feel it through his message, nonetheless he replied saying heâll miss you, which put a smile to your tired face from work.
When you went home from your shift at 9pm, Jungkook wasnât anywhere in the house. Which was a shame â because you were planning to talk to him.
Well. Maybe youâd wait for him.
But it seemed like you underestimated your exhaustion for the day because as soon you finished showering, dressing yourself with your bed clothes which consists of comfortable flimsy camisole and panty shorts, you went straight to bed and passed out â forgetting about Jungkook.
Itâs past 2 am when you feel yourself waking up from your deep slumber, stomach grumbling at the emptiness, and you realize you did not only forget about waiting for Jungkook but also about eating dinner.
Walking out of your room, you head straight to the kitchen where you immediately go to open the refrigerator to see if thereâs something in it you can consume. There are boxes of Chinese food take-out which makes your eyes light up. When you open to smell them, it seems that theyâre still new.
You deduce it must be Jungkookâs.
That gives you the predicament of whether you should eat it or not. You take youâre not exactly on good terms as of the moment â therefore you canât eat his food. But youâre really hungry.
Throwing away your inhibitions, you open one of the boxes, not even bothering to heat the food.
âHey,â
You almost jump upon hearing another voice. Looking to your side, you see Jungkook approaching, with only his boxers on, upper half naked. Â
âH-hey,â you say, pursing your lips into a thin line. âAre these yours?â You point to the take-out box in your hand.
Jungkook nods and heads straight to your direction. Taking one of the boxes, he hauls himself to the kitchen island, twisting his body so that he can face you.
âYep.â he responds, dipping his fingers inside the box and taking out strands of noodles from it.
You wince at the sight. âLook like worms.â
âJust like worms.â Jungkook grins, chewing on them in that obnoxious way because he knows you donât like noisy eaters.
Frowning, you decide to follow him to the island and haul yourself on top of it as well, sitting beside him. Jungkook scoots to the side to give you more room.
âItâs kind of like eating naengmyeon, I donât like naengmyeon.â You tell him, opening another box and feeling delighted to see untouched stir-fried rice. âDid you just buy this earlier?â
Jungkook nods. âLeft them in the fridge when I realized I wasnât too hungry.â
âThen you woke up feeling hungry?â You smile at him.
He chuckles. âYeah. When did you get off work?â
âNine. You?â
âTwelve am.â
You grimace at that, but nod in understanding.
Thereâs a beat of silence before Jungkook speaks up again.
âDidnât expect to see you here tonight.â
âJust wanted to remind you Iâm still your housemateâŠâ you joke, brushing your elbow against his arm in a teasing manner.
Jungkook laughs as he shakes his head. He picks up another batch of noodles in his fingers and then offers it to you, prompting you to arch your brow at him. âTry it.â
You shake your head. âI hate cold noodles.â
âJust try,â He insists, placing it closer to your face. You scrunch your nose, skeptical. It makes Jungkook chuckle lowly. âHead back.â
Hesitantly, you tilt your head back and open your mouth as Jungkook puts the noodles inside it. You almost choke on it when Jungkook laughs mid-way, making you laugh as well, but thankfully, you were able to chew all of them just fine.
âWhat the fuck.â You frown, slapping his arm good-naturedly.
âWasnât so bad, huh?â
âIt was bad.â You say, going back to eating your fried rice. Jungkook gives you a look that says heâs not convinced. Looking at his face, you roll your eyes, âItâs like eatingââ you stop mid-sentence as Jungkook quickly wipes off something on the side of your lips. Itâs so quick though that you brush it off just as instantly and continue, ââliteral worms.â
âImagine if worms tasted like noodles. Wouldnât that be sick as hell?â Jungkook muses, stretching his arm over you to reach for another take-out box on the counter. Itâs so sudden that your immediate reflex was to stretch your upper body backwards, feeling a little taken aback when Jungkookâs face gets a little too close to your stomach, with his arm rubbing over your bare thighs.
He seems like it doesnât move him, though. Just goes back to his position casually and opens another box. As he does, you canât help but take a quick look at his bulging thighs, the short length of his boxers letting you get a brief view of the tattoo that peeks out of the expanse of his skin. Youâve seen that before many times, but not the entirety â of course not. It looks like it goes up from way above. Anyway, itâs sort of like a flower, but youâre not sure. You never really asked him about it. He never brings it up either.
âOh, man, the dumplings got cold.â Jungkook picks inside his box as if heâd miraculously find one thatâs not cold.
You roll your eyes at his antics. âYou stored them in the fridge for like how many hours now?â
Ignoring you, Jungkook takes out one dumpling, trying to eat it, and you watch as he visibly winces. In a moment, he shoots one straight to the trash bin across from you.
âOh, thatâs real mature.â You say dryly.
With that, Jungkook throws another one, giving you a cheeky grin when it lands in the bin successfully for the second time.
Pursing your lips, you sarcastically say, âWow. Two points to Xavier from Jeon Jungkook.â
That makes Jungkook look at you instantly.
âHow the hell do you know that?â He gives you a look of confusion but thereâs amusement written all over his face at the same time.
âWell⊠Mingyu told me you both played for the basketball varsity team back in undergrad, so,â
Jungkook stops. Thereâs look of something in his eyes that you canât quite point out, but then suddenly, he nods.
âHe told you how good I was?â He says with a teasing tone, a contrast to his sudden and quick drop of mood a few seconds ago.
You throw him a tissue. âDonât be cocky. He just mentioned it.â
âI was captain. Two-time MOP, 2018 and 2019 NCAA Menâs Basketball Tournament.â
You look at him with silent reverence. Well, Mingyu didnât tell you all that, thatâs for sure. Itâs a bit surreal to picture Jungkook wearing a basketball uniform, though. Youâre so used to seeing him in scrubs and lab gown and his usual casual, occasionally suits when you attend formal conferences. Youâve only ever seen him sweat it out whenever he works out in the living room.
âImpressive.â You say. Jungkook grins proudly. âItâs strange I only know about it now, though.â
âYou never asked.â He shrugs. âWhat âbout you? I only know youâre little miss summa cum laude.â
Huffing, you jab at his arm when he mentions it, rolling your eyes at him which only earns you a chuckle. Regardless, you tell him, â2018 NCA College Nationals. We won Coed Division One.â
Jungkook arches a brow. âNCA⊠National Cheerleading Association?â You nod, eating from your take-out box so as to avoid Jungkookâs look after you do so.
âNo fucking way,â He says incredulously. âSeriously?â
âYeah,â You bite your lip to keep yourself from smiling too much. You never really get to share this part about you with a lot of people. To quote Jungkook, they never ask. Itâs funny when they do get surprised by it though, like he is now. When Jungkook stares at you â you donât know if itâs just in disbelief â longer than necessary, you realize heâs staring at your face and that makes you consciously fix a strand of hair behind your ear. âGo big blue, go big blue, show âem what wildcats can do.â You sing a in fast tempo, chuckling about how silly it sounds.
Jungkook utters a sound of amusement. âThatâs⊠wow. Right now, Iâm just picturing you cheering but itâs a bit hazy and shit.â
âYouâre saying you canât picture me cheering?â You playfully accuse, but you know exactly what he meant. Even you still donât believe that you actually did cheer in undergrad. When you signed up for it, it was just because you had to choose a club, and you werenât interested in anything other than that. You thought cheering would be fun and it was fun.
âNo, Iâm justââ Jungkook cuts himself off and looks at you. âOkay, now I totally deserve a cheer for that two-point shot I made just now.â
You laugh loudly at that. Covering your mouth, you look at him to see if heâs joking but he seems to be serious.
âNo.â You say, your eyes widening, body stiffening.
âCome on,â Jungkook chuckles.
You roll your eyes. âYou have to do more than a two-point shot to get a cheer.â
âOkay, what do you want me to do?â Jungkook eagerly presents a challange. You stifle a laugh when he gears up for something. âI can shoot dumplings further from here with my left hand.â
âTen feet away,â You muse, giggling when Jungkook suddenly gets off the counter, carrying the box of dumplings, and positions himself further away from you. Laughing, you shake your head before you say, âYou canât do it.â
âTry me.â He says as he begins to pick out a dumpling and concentrate on the trash can. Before he shoots, he tells you, âThis oneâs for you.â
You watch as the dumpling misses the bin.
Jungkook beats you to speaking first. âI admit. Iâm a bit rusty.â
Sneering, you eat your fried rice, not straying your eyes from him. âYou have to shoot, like, three dumplings.â
âThat was a trial shot.â he insists, eyeing you playfully, before he gears up for another again. You watch closely when he makes a move to shoot another dumpling.
It goes in. Jungkook smirks at you when you look at him, impressed.
âNot bad.â You cock your head to the side.
âTss.â He shoots another shot again and itâs successful for the second time. âThatâs two.â Jungkook shows you his fingers and you chuckle at his enthusiasm.
âLetâs see if you can get the third.â
Jungkook nods, and you cover a snicker again at the way his stance suddenly turns serious, as if heâs really taking the whole thing seriously.
In a few seconds, he shoots the last dumpling straight to the bin just as successfully as the last time.
âWhat did I say?â Jungkook brags as he goes over to the island across from you, sitting on the high chairs this time. You turn your body to look at him, containing your smile. âYour turn now.â Jungkook says with a smirk.
Your purse your lips. âIâm a bit rusty.â
âSo was I!â Jungkook claims which prompts a chuckle from you.
You look at him for a while, unsure. You close your eyes, bobbing your head side to side, covering your face as you suddenly feel a sense of embarrassment at the thought of dancing in front of him.
âPromise you wonât laugh?â You say after Jungkook tries to remove your hands off your face.
He raises his right hand and fixes his sitting posture upright. âPromise.â
âIf you show your teeth Iâll stop and so will this friendship.â You threaten as you bring your legs over the island to his direction.
Jungkook chuckles while saying a series of âYeahâs, holding your hand to help you hop off the counter safely.
You take a few quick strides to place yourself in the space between your counter and dining area and look at Jungkook who settles himself comfortably in the kitchen island chair, watching you with relaxed position and crossed arms.
Feeling uncharacteristically shy, you stand upright, suddenly aware that youâre only wearing a pair of panty shorts and a fitted camisole. You donât work out so youâre a bit conscious in front of Jungkook who looks really good in his natural form. You donât even understand how he finds time to go to the gym or do his little work-out sesh during some nights or weekends, but you shake away the thought and smile at him coyly. He has the better body, sure, but you know well enough heâll never judge you for yours⊠besides, itâs just Jungkook. He makes you feel safe and secure, no matter the context of the situation.
Off the top of your head, you do whatever it is you remember from your college routines and begin your yell.
âWildcats, get up and shout! Weâre the team thatâs gonna take it out! Give it all youâve got, letâs hear you roar!â You chuckle mid-way, forgetting a step. âSorry,â you apologize quickly, but then continue right away, trapping your bottom lip with your teeth to prevent yourself from completely losing it. âWeâre the Wildcats, and weâre here to score! Go Big Blue! Go Big Blueâ" You make a mistake again and skip a beat with your finger snaps, and when you look at Jungkook, you canât help but give in to the laughter thatâs been bubbling up inside you. âI canât do it!â You say, cutting your âperformanceâ short.
âWhat? It was good!â Jungkook says, encouraging you to continue further.
You stifle a laugh as you go back to the top again but then your mind forgets the next step and youâre messing up the choreography again. At that point, you start mindlessly cheering; jumping around and flapping your arms to make it look like somewhat of a cheer but none of the coordination. You know it looks messy, so you run over to Jungkook shamefully, plopping on the chair beside him. Bringing your legs up to the seat and covering your face in your thighs, you canât help but giggle in embarrassment.
âWoah,â Jungkook says, but you can say thereâs a hint of laughter in his tone. You know itâs not out of mockery when he lifts your head up and boop your nose. âThat was cute. Best cheer Iâve ever seen.â
âYouâre pushing it.â You hiss, kicking his knee slightly.
Jungkook captures your leg, and you squeal when he pinches your thigh. You both laugh at that and you thought Jungkookâs gonna let go of your leg but he keeps it on his lap.
âMy stomach hurts from laughing.â You tell him, taking a deep breath, trying to regulate your heart. Everything feels funny. Your cheer was funny. You mustâve looked so stupid.
Jungkook chuckles. âWildcats, get up and shoutââ
âJungkook!â You cut him off, removing your leg from his lap to kick him again on the thigh this time. That only prompts him to laugh louder.
When the high of the moment fades, Jungkook looks over at you.
âDo you feel sleepy?â
You shake your head. âNot really. At least not yet.â
He hums, and then takes your box of fried rice to eat from it.
Thereâs the silence again, but itâs quiet and comfortable. No weird tension sitting in the air.
âJungkook,â You call him after a while.
âHm.â
You clear your throat. âI meant to talk to you,â Jungkook stops eating and looks at you to acknowledge you. âIâm sorry.â
He stares at you for a moment. Then, he chuckles, shaking his head. âYou know whatâs funny? I was gonna talk to you yesterday to say Iâm sorry but then you didnât talk to me at all in the OR. I thought you were still mad at me.â
With furrowed brows, you tell him, âI thought you were mad at me. You only said âscalpelâ in the OR and then that was it. No hiâs or helloâs in the hallways for the past three days.â
âMe? Mad at you?â He says, as if he canât believe you would even think that. âI mean, you piss me off sometimes, but I donât think I was ever mad at you.â You pout. Jungkook smiles. âI can never be mad at you,â His look is gentle and warm that you feel a little flustered for a reason unknown. It just ticks a little something in your brain, tugging something at your heart. Then, Jungkook sighs. âIâm sorry, too. For the way I went about it. The âbringing boys hereâ comment was out of line.â
Thereâs a wince on your face when you hear that.
That comment did hurt a little.
But you know it was just a heat-in-the-moment type of thing, and he just wasnât able to think through his words well enough when he was⊠well, pissed â and rightfully so. Because you did something offensive to him, and you canât blame him for feeling the way he felt.
You nod at Jungkook. âThank you for saying that. Iâm saying sorry because I realized what you said. I shouldâve informed you I was bringing Mingyu home, and I shouldâve told him about you being my roommate. We really couldâve avoided that situation.â
âYou can just tell me beforehand if youâre bringing him to our place.â Jungkook shrugs.
You chuckle. âNo. That wonât happen again.â And itâs true. Itâs awkward and itâs rude when you have a roommate.
Jungkook looks at you. âOkay. I wonât do it as well,â You shake your head, playfully rolling your eyes at him. âIâm guessing you settled it pretty quickly with him?â He gestures at your neck and you realize heâs referring to the necklace youâre wearing â the one Mingyu gave you the very same day you fought.
You want to point out itâs not really new, but you settle with, âYeah. Fortunately.â as a response.
âI really am sorry for what happened.â Jungkook says and you can feel the sincerity in his voice.
âItâs fine,â Touching his arm, you give him a small smile. âHave you and Mingyu talked?â
Jungkook shakes his head. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you think about how thatâs⊠not good. They were friends before you and have just met each other again after so many years â you do not want to be that kind of person who gets in the way of some other peopleâs relationship.
And you really canât have Jungkook not liking your boyfriend or your boyfriend not liking Jungkook, either.
But as much as you want to suggest that they talk it out, you know you canât. Besides, you trust that they eventually will. Theyâre grown men.
âSoâŠâ you trail off. âAre we okay?â
Jungkookâs lips tilt upwards. âAre we okay?â
âCome on,â you roll your eyes. âDo we hug it out or like â I donât know â handshake on it?â
âLetâs hug it out like weâre twelve.â Jungkook grins and in a moment, he scoots closer to you and wraps his arms around your waist, resting his head on your chest.
The angle is a bit awkward with Jungkook crouching too much you donât doubt his position is anything but comfortable, but it works, and it gives you the opportunity to pat his head as you say, âI missed hanging out with you, buddy.â
âCanât say the same thing.â
That earns him a slight pinch to the ear easily accessible to you.
âOw!â Jungkook says and then add, âI hate to ruin the moment but⊠youâre not wearing a bra.â
You quickly grab both sides of his head to get him off your chest. He comes back sitting upright on his chair, laughing.
âFuck offââ you flip him off and then look over your box of fried rice, but then you remember he was also eating it earlier. âYou ate all of it!â
âFinders keepers.â
âI hate you.â
âHm.â
You shake your head, standing up and starting to grab all the boxes to take them to the trash bin.
âBy the way, I just got my approval from HR for our trip the next two weeks. Have you?â You ask him across the room. You can see Jungkookâs face light up at the mention.
âYeah, of course. Got approved yesterday.â Jungkook grins. You watch as he stares at you a bit longer, his face showing a hint of confusion.
You arch a brow. âWhy does your face look like that?â Jungkook shakes his head, obviously ready to dismiss it. But youâre persistent. âWhat is it?â You say, walking towards his direction and stopping in front of him.
âNothingâŠâ he trails off. Then he rubs the back of his head. âI just really thought that youâŠâ You squint your eyes at him. Then he chuckles lightly and swipes his fingers through his hair. âI just thought the trip would be cancelled.â
Your eyebrows furrow. Frowning, you nudge at him. âWhat? Of course, not! We planned that trip like six months ago. Iâm not backing out.â
Jungkook gives you a shy smile.
âOkay.â
You canât help it. You bring your hands to his cheeks and pinch them.
âHeâs so excited for his birthday trip!â You say, intentionally talking like you would to a toddler.
Jungkook predictably forces your hands out of his skin and holds your wrist a bit tight as he rolls his eyes at you.
âKnock it off.â He glares at you. But youâre not done with your fun, so you poke your finger to his waist, knowing thatâs his weak spot, and tease him some more. âSeriously.â Jungkook huffs out and your laughter becomes louder because he looks like a grumpy child right now.
âSorry.â you say, still giggling. He furrows his brows, and you canât help it, you poke at his waist again. When you do it, though, Jungkook captures your wrist, effectively stopping another one of your juvenile assaults. Suddenly, you start noting the mirth in his eyes.
Youâve seen that look before and it always ends up with you almost dying from too much laughter because he alwaysâ
âYouâre gonna regret that.â
You let out a squeal as Jungkook takes ahold of your waist, and before you can even voice out a protest, he easily hoists you up against his body, bouncing you up until you're hanging around his shoulder like a sack bag.
âWhat the hell, put me down, you prick!â You complain, slapping the rugged muscles on his back. But Jungkook just responds with a series of clicks of his tongue, carrying you across the living room.
You know heâs about to put you on the couch to tickle you to death, so you do what you could and bite down on the skin of his back.
âOuch!â Jungkook immediately reacts, stumbling a little in his stride. You snort at that, but you immediately frown when you feel a slap to your ass.
âYou asshole!â
âYou just lowered your chances of being spared,â Was his last words before you feel yourself getting put down on the surface of the sofa. Soon after, Jungkookâs poking his fingers to your waist and stomach, prompting you to erupt in fits of giggles and laughter, thrashing beneath him like a caged animal.
âPlâstopâoh my god!â You say, weakly reaching for his arms. When Jungkook doesnât relent, you continue wriggling under him, laughing and choking, saying a variety of, âStop! Iâm ââ giggle, âgonnaââ then another snort, ââdie!â
Jungkook chuckles. He torments you some more before finally stopping his fingers in their ministrations.
âYou deserve that.â Jungkook says when you both came down from the high, laughing at the messy state of your hair and the way you try to catch your breath like you just ran a triathlon.
You breathe in and out deeply, clutching your stomach that still hurts from laughing.
âFuck you.â You hiss, giving him the finger.
Jungkook bursts into laughter, and from his position in between your legs, he lets himself fall on top of you.
âJungkook, no!â Pushing him off you, you try to get away from him but the goof just forces himself beside you instead, sticking his much bigger build in between you and the back of the couch. It makes you scoot near the edge as a result, and you hold onto his arm so that you donât fall off, tangling your leg against his own for added support. Pinching his waist in which he lets out an ingenuine âOwe!â to, you face him as you say, âYou are so annoying.â
Jungkook just gives you a shit-eating grin. âWho started it?â
âYou almost killed me.â You say dryly.
âDonât be dramatic.â He rolls his eyes.
Suddenly, you realize the position you are both in.
Your bare legs are intermingled against each other, Jungkook has one arm wrapped around your waist, and from the lack of clothes on both sides, you can feel pretty much everything.
Thereâs a weird feeling in the pit of your stomach upon the epiphany.
Jungkookâs looking at you with a playful grin, but as he notices you staring at him, he stills. From such close proximity, you can almost trace out the lines of his features. The scar on his cheek, the mole under his lip, and the pimple scar that was probably from a week ago. At that thought, you think about: if you can see him so close like this, he can also probably see you, and thatâs when you break away from the contact.
âShit.â You hiss as you let yourself fall off the floor by rolling around, away from his hold and touch and him in general.
Jungkook immediately scoots to the edge of the sofa to look down at you with confused eyes. âThe hell?â
âDonât worry,â you wave your hand at him.
He snorts. âDid you just fall?â
You roll your eyes. Of course, heâd think that. But you let him, standing up from the floor.
âYeah, yeah, whatever you say.â
You hear Jungkookâs boisterous laughter as you walk towards the kitchen again, stopping in front of the fridge to get some water.
âYouâre going to bed now?â Asks Jungkook, following you to the fridge and mirroring your activity.
Nodding at his question, you peer from the rim of the glass as you answer, âYeah, I donât want to be sleeping at the hospital later.â
âFair.â
Soon after, you both decided to clean up a bit in the kitchen and when you finished, you two headed towards the direction of your bedrooms. Itâs located just near the kitchen, with the doors located beside each other.
When you turn the knob open to your own door, Jungkook calls you, catching your attention.
You arch a brow at him, waiting.
âGood night,â Jungkook says. You drop your kitted brows and smile. Youâre about to greet him the same but then he adds, âAlsoâ that was a really great cheer.â
âUgh, Jungkook!â
You look across the bed to see Mingyu still on his laptop on his worktable, working on something. An hour and thirty minutes have passed since you arrived at his place, but youâre still not getting the least bit of attention from him.
You get it, itâs work, but he asked you to come over⊠isnât it only fair to expect a little bit of something?
Getting up from the bed, you trudge over to his direction.
âHi,â you say, ducking down to wrap your arms around his neck from the back of his swivel chair and kissing the spot below his ear.
âHi,â Mingyu meets the kiss you give him on the lips. He reaches for your hands resting on top of chest and holds it there, looking at you. You delight at the hint of attention. âIâll just be in a few minutes. Youâre staying, right?â
You grin. âOf course.â
âGood.â
Rolling your eyes, you take your hands off him and stand upright once again. Mingyu rotates his chair so he can look at you with his undivided attention, voicing out a low whistle when he takes in your outfit â or lack of it thereof.
You arch a brow, knowing well heâs ogling you only in your bra and panties, squinting your eyes at him. Slowly, you glide your leg over his waist and plop yourself down on his lap, waiting for any protest from him. It doesnât come, and so you give him a grin before planting your lips against his.
The kiss turns heated in a matter of seconds, with Mingyu squeezing over your bra and taking in your soft moans against his mouth, feeling the delicious roll of your hips against his crotch where you feel a semi growing already. Â
âSweetheart,â Mingyu grunts. When you donât answer that, he cups your jaw, making you look at him. â__.â
âWhat?â You say, more like a whine, looking at him with hooded eyes. Youâre starting to feel sticky in your underwear and you need him to do something about it.
âNot now, sweetheart. I told you, Iâm working.â
You frown. Thereâs a beat of silence before you let out a sigh. âOkay.â You say, getting off his lap.
âIâll take care of you when Iâm done.â He promises, taking ahold of your wrist, looking up at you.
Pursing your lips, you look away. âItâs fine.â When Mingyu lets go, you look at the direction of the bathroom. âIâm gonna take a shower,â you tell him. âYouâre free to join me if you want or whatever.â
You know he canât and that he wonât.
âAlright.â Was the last thing you heard before you walked towards the bathroom door.
Youâve been over at his place too many times to count now, and youâre slowly building your shower essentials in his own bathroom. Your body wash, your face cream, your shampoo, your conditioner â even your moisturizer and your eye mask are already placed inside his bathroom cabinet.
As you step out of the shower box, all clean and fresh, you go over to the lavatory to brush your teeth. At the sight of both your cups sitting beside each other, you smile.
You look in the mirror â noting the way your lips canât stop from curling up at the thoughts running inside your head.
Shaking them off, you grab Mingyuâs robe and put it over yourself, turning the knob around to step out of the bathroom.
You see Mingyu on his bed this time around, but his laptopâs still perched on his lap.
He looks up when he sees you. âReady to sleep?â
You nod, feeling at home the way you automatically go towards his closet to pick out a shirt and some panties you left over the time.
As youâre in the process of dressing yourself, a phoneâs ding rings in the room.
Looking at Mingyu, you watch as he checks his phone, assuming it came from him. When he puts it down, he looks at your plugged phone on the bedside table.
âWhat is it?â You ask, now properly dressed, walking to the bed.
You note the way Mingyuâs gaze changes as he hands you your phone.
âItâs Jungkook.â He says with a weirdly clipped tone. Then another ding comes. A beat, and then your phone rings.
Your brow shoots up, taking the device from him and checking it yourself.
Jungkookâs face is plastered over your screen â a picture of him wasted in his room two years ago, taken from your Thailand trip with the rest of your friends. Heâs sleeping with his mouth open, shirtless in the middle of the hut, only covered up with his trunks. You remember setting it as his contact photo because it was funny back then. Jungkook hates the photo, and your friends always made fun of him for it.
Right now, though, it doesnât feel the least bit funny. Not when Mingyuâs certainly saw it. Not when he looks a little put off as soon as he sees a glimpse of it when he was passing your phone to you.
âIâll just answer this.â You say, standing from the bed again.
You donât expect Mingyu to suddenly shoot you a question, âYou canât answer here?â
Brows knitting together, you give him an uncertain look. âItâs just Jungkook.â
âYeah⊠so, why not here?â
You relent, seeing the point heâs trying to make. Plopping yourself on the bed again, you answer Jungkookâs call and put the phone over your ear.
âJungkook,â
â__,â he sighs out your name, sounding relieved. âThank fuck.â
âWhatâs wrong?â You ask, growing a bit concerned at his tone.
You can hear some shuffling from the other line as Jungkook tells you, âDid you see me with my pager in the locker room earlier?â
âOh, uh⊠let me thinkâŠâ you trail off, trying to remember the events earlier. As you do that, you notice Mingyuâs fingers trailing his hands to your bare legs, but you ignore it as you answer Jungkook, âI think I didnât, yeah. I didnât.â Jungkook hisses. âDid you check your car?â you ask, trying to help out.
âAlready did. Itâs not in there, either. I really think I accidentally threw it out in the bin along with some trash in my pockets.â He says, sounding a little distressed now.
âWell⊠you can always just go to the operator, you know? Get a new pager?â you offer. Thereâs a drop of kiss on your shoulder that makes you shudder, and you look at Mingyu with furrowed brows. He doesnât say anything, though, just let his fingers trail upwards, his hand sliding under your shirt, gripping your thigh. Your boyfriend just gives you a sly smile, and you squint your eyes at him, confused at what heâs playing at.Â
âI know. But, ugh, you know I lost two pagers already this year. Sungkyun hates me at this pointââ
Jungkookâs answer suddenly drowns out when Mingyu grazes his thumb on your clothed clit.
âOh.â
ââwhat?â Jungkook halts, asking about your abrupt reaction.
You bite your lip in an effort to shut yourself up, and when Mingyuâs hand makes another move again, your free hand shoots up to stop him.
âHold on a second, Jungkook,â you say, quickly pressing mute.
Mingyu looks at you with a smirk, playful smile painting his face. âYou know you can continue, right?â
At that, your brows furrow even further.
âWhat are you doing?â You didnât mean to sound curt but with the way Mingyuâs expression changes, it may have sounded that way.
You⊠couldnât help it.
âI wanted to touch you,â Mingyu tells you after a beat of awkward silence. Then, his hand retreats to himself. âDo you not want to?â
Thereâs guilt that springs up inside you when you see the look on his face as he says those words.
âNo, Iâm sorryâ itâs just⊠I want to. I just⊠not with somebody on the phone?â You put it out like a question, unsure of yourself.
The room is quiet for awhile and suddenly thereâs a thick tension that hangs in the air.
You reach out for Mingyu but then drop your hand to your sides when he moves to sit on the edge of the bed.
He turns his head to you with an unreadable expression on his face. âIs it because itâs Jungkook?â
You frown at his tone.
It sounded accusatory.
âExcuse me?â You say, taking immediate offense. When Mingyu shrugs, you feel a bit of annoyance bubble up inside you. âI wouldâve still stopped you if it was anybody else on the phone, Mingyu.â you say, tone firm and leveled.
âIâm sorry, then.â
But he definitely doesnât sound like it. His sarcasm makes you snap. âWhatâs up with you?â
Mingyu opens his mouth to say something but then he closes it again. You watch him with confused eyes, completely at loss of context where heâs at. The night was going fine as usual and suddenly, thereâs this.
After a few seconds, Mingyu sighs. âWhat are you even talking about right now?â He glances at your phone.
âItâsââ you take a glance at it too. âItâs just his pager.â
âPager?â
âYes.â
âHe asks you about his pager in the middle of the night, knowing full well youâre with me?â
âIââ you stop yourself, words suddenly getting lost in your tongue. Not because you donât know the answer to his question, but because you hate the way he phrased it â and honestly, youâre starting to feel icky about how heâs going with it. What was he trying to do? Pin you down with accusatory notions?
You donât fucking get it. Jungkookâs his friend. Itâs so bizarre to even think about how Mingyu is seemingly acting jealous over his supposed friend.
âYou know what?â You say instead, not wanting to discuss it further with him anymore. Itâs just gonna lead to an unnecessary fight â and frankly, you donât want to deal with his jealousy. It seems so⊠futile. âCan we just sleep this whole thing off?â
Mingyu looks at you and for the first time, his eyes donât look gentle. He looks at you with a bit of a frown, and you get it. You do. Youâre not exactly happy, either. Not right now, with the way heâs acting.
âDo you want me to go?â You ask, ready to step out of bed.
âI didnât tell you to.â Mingyu says, voice equally strained.
You sigh. âWhat do you want me to do, Mingyu? Are you jealous, is that it?â You meant it to be completely rhetorical, not at all expecting him to say anything.
But he answers instantly. âWhat if I say I am?â
Your lips part. Youâre surprised at the confirmation, but you shake your thoughts off it.
âThen itâs completely unnecessary,â you tell him, as genuine as you can sound. When Mingyu doesnât move in his position on the edge of the bed, you crawl towards him. Testing the waters, you touch his arm to see if he would avoid your touch, but when you do rest your hand on his shoulder, he doesnât stray. âI like you, Gyu.â
Cocking your head to the side, you watch as his face still sports a cold expression. But he says, âI like you too, you know that,â
âButâŠ?â you try to get out the words from him, because you knew thereâs more.
âI donât want you to think Iâm being irrational about this whole thing,â he starts, and you nod your head, trying to show him that you get it. Mingyu licks his lips before he continues, âI just⊠I guess I just want you to put boundaries around your friendship with Jeon.â
That makes you stop. Nevermind the strange way he called Jungkook by his surname.
âHow do you mean by that?â You ask with furrowed brows.
âYouâre just really close with him. And you live in one apartment together.â He points out.
âMingyuâŠâ you say, suddenly feeling tired all over again. âI thought we already talked about that.â
âDoesnât mean Iâm a hundred percent comfortable with it, you know?â
It feels like you got electrocuted by his words the way you quickly retreat your hands. âThatâsâŠâ you trail off, not really knowing what to say.
Thankfully, though, Mingyu interjects before you can slip into a dilemma.
âI know, I know about why youâre living with him and all that stuff. We talked about it. Itâs justâŠâ he reaches for your hand. Entangling your fingers together, Mingyu brings your knuckles to his lips and presses a kiss there. âI want you all the time. And I guess I really am just jealous â even though itâs juvenile. Iâm jealous that heâs known you far longer than me.â
âButâ Iâm here thrice a week. I make time for the both of us. And it doesnât really matter how long youâve known me for, Gyu,â you respond truthfully.
He nods.
âIâm sorry.â
You shake your head. âNo, Iâm sorry. I guess I justâ I got in way over my head that I also forgot to take your feelings into account,â
Mingyu smiles, and there goes his soft gentle expression again.
âI know. Itâs fine. You donât have anything to be sorry about. Itâs me whoâs being unreasonable.â
âNo, itâs not unreasonable,â you tell him. âI get it. Boundaries, Mingyu. I know what youâre talking about.â
Mingyu scooches closer and presses a sweet kiss to your lips. You gladly bask in it, smiling against his lips, keeping your gentle gaze towards him as he breaks away.
âIâm sorry for being a bummer.â
You kiss him again and the way he inserts his tongue in your mouth distracts you a bit but you manage to break the contact. Soon, heâs lying down beside you and when you check your phone, your call with Jungkook has already ended, but there are two messages from him on your notifications.
[12:35am] jaykayđ€ : are you still alive [12:38am] jaykayđ€ : ok nevermind iâll hang the call i actually found my pager just now đ [12:38am] jaykayđ€ : it was in the kitchen counter LOL [12:45am] jaykayđ€ : ok bye. night
You were going to reply but decide against it for some reason.
Putting your phone down to the bedside table, you follow Mingyu under the sheets and as usual, you face against his direction just like he does.
Unfortunately, he doesnât really like cuddling that much. Heâd share his space to a certain extent, just like how you got into his bed in the first place, but not the lengths of cuddling together in bed. Mingyu didnât tell you why â and you donât want to come off as clingy, so you donât bother asking.
Itâs strange, though. Now that he told you a while ago that he, apparently, âwants you all the timeâ. Shouldnât he like to cuddle you in bed, then? But you donât want to dwell in it too much, afraid that you may be digging yourself a hole if you were to keep it up.
As you lay your cheek on your folded hands, you play back the events of the night and think about how youâve seen this film before.
When you were in med school, Eunwoo always had something to say about your friendship with Jungkook. He wasnât direct with it, but with the way he never bothered to make friends with Jungkook or always had a grimace on his face when you mentioned him in passing, it was enough for you to conclude that Eunwoo was always⊠wary of Jungkook â and definitely in a jealous type of way.
He said almost the exact same thing as Mingyu â that boundaries should be built; that Jungkook and you are too close, why is he calling you in the middle of the night to ask about mundane things, why does he know too much about your motherâs preferences, and why is he buddy-buddy with your dad who otherwise always had an uninterested expression on his face?
It wasnât even just Mingyu. Your past flings for the past four years youâve been single always got put off when they heard that youâre rooming with a guy â even more so when you mention that heâs your bestfriend.
Youâre not stupid to not see how it looks like from the outside perspective â and youâre not dense to not ever consider the possibility of something romantic brewing within the friendship. You have thought about it before â had an instant crush on him the first time you met at the law library back in post grad school. But it was fleeting at best, especially when Eunwoo came into your life a few weeks later.
Nayeon, Doyeon, and Taehyung have also hinted at it. Sometimes â most of the time, really, teasing you two, especially Taehyung. Even the most mature one among your friends â Yoongi â once told you both to get married at forty. He was joking, though he looked way too serious for someone who was just supposed to be joking.
And there was that one dreadful time in third year of med school when Jungkook almost kissed you.
You buried that memory in the very depths of your mind â not ever wanting to revisit it again. It was a bad time, and it was just not a good thing to look back at. Jungkook acted irresponsible, and you stupidly let yourself be complicit in it, even though you knew better.
Nothing even happened â but that memory was just that. A mere memory. You doubt Jungkook even remembers that himself.
Hereâs the thing: youâve just never seen Jungkook past the person you consider as a friend. Youâve never been weird about the women he dated â or if he dated, at all. Heâs also always been supportive of your relationships⊠as far as youâre concerned. Regardless of what everybody says, you both seem to agree that youâre just better off as friends. You work better that way.
Jungkookâs a good guy, though. He does have tons of flings â but heâs just conventionally attractive and works hard for a body that is to die for. Women like that. Additionally, he has a stable job and even though he annoys you about splitting the delivery fee when you do take-out, heâs actually quite rich â or, his family is â heâd always insist.
You get it though. As a co-resident, you both donât really make that much (for the work that you do) â at least not yet.
But he was indeed born in generational wealth, coming from a family of doctors, which is why itâs quite impressive that he knows how to handle his life by his own hard work. His intelligence and perseverance are some of the things you admire about him, his drive to make a name for himself and never leeching off his familyâs name. Jungkook doesnât ever brag about how his neurosurgeon dad is one of the best in the country and how his mom is a legend in cardiac surgery â even though sometimes, he could use it a little. Heâs playful yet charming; quiet when youâre just knowing him, but heâll eventually talk a lot when you get close.
As a friend, heâs quite the best youâve ever had.
And even though you donât really see him past that, you know in your heart that whoever ends up with him romantically will be a very lucky person.
âYouâre a pussy.â
âDoyeon.â
Doyeon huffs, rolling her eyes so hard at Taehyungâs reprimand and then goes back to glaring at Jungkook again who just looks at her with a pathetic expression.
âWhat? Iâm right. Heâs a pussy and youâre an even bigger pussy for defending him being a pussy.â She says, furrowing her eyebrows angrily.
âWhy are we talking about pussies?â
Nayeon suddenly enters the on-call room and Jungkook nearly has a heart attack.
âWhat the hell, you should at least knock. Jesus.â Jungkook says, clutching his chest, looking at Nayeon with an almost offended expression who closes the door behind her.
âWere you scared it was __? See!â Doyeon sighs out in frustration. âSuch a fucking pussy.â
âSuch a fucking pussy,â Jungkook mocks, using a higher pitch to imitate Doyeon poorly.
âAnd a child too.â She rolls her eyes and throws him a pillow. It misses Jungkook and hits Taehyung instead.
âSeriously, what are you so mad about today? You have that mood. Did you and your secret boyfriend fight?â Taehyung spits out.
Everybody stills in the room when Doyeon gives him a sharp glare. That pretty much makes everyone shut up, especially Taehyung who makes a show of physically zipping his mouth.
Nayeon fakes a cough and trudges towards Jungkook sitting on one of the beds. She throws her heavy hands on his shoulders, more like slaps, and then looks at Doyeon as she asks, âWhat are we calling this man a pussy for?â
âOh, ask him. Or his dumber best friend.â Doyeon rolls his eyes and looks at Taehyung, crossing her arms and leaning her back on the chair sheâs sitting on from across the room.
âYouâre starting to hurt my feelings and I hate you.â Taehyung says from the other bed.
âWhy?â Nayeon ignores their banter and furrows her brows at Jungkook curiously.
Jungkook hisses under his breath. âItâs nothing. She calls me a pussy for literally everything.â
Doyeon butts in. âYeah, are you gonna cry?â
âIf __ was here, sheâs gonna be on my side, you know that?â Jungkook rebuts.
âIf __ was here, youâd be panicking because sheâll know about your little secret.â
âOof.â Taehyung comments.
âOh, JungkookieâŠâ Nayeon looks down at him with worried eyes. When he looks up with a sad look, she starts rubbing his shoulders as some sort of comfort, already knowing about what this might be about. âThis is about⊠the thing?â
He nods weakly. âYes. And no. Uh, well, this is⊠you know about the birthday trip in the next five days, right? So, she asked me if she could bring, uh, Mingyu along.â
âOh.â Nayeon utters, looking at Doyeon for confirmation.
Doyeon nods, and then nags, âAsk him what he said.â
Nayeon looks at him. âWhat did you say?â
âI said yes.â
âOh.â
Jungkook looks down in slight shame at Nayeonâs reaction. She completely stops her handsâ ministrations on his shoulder, indicating that even she could not believe what he just did.
This makes Jungkook even feel worse.
Leaning his elbow on his thighs, he runs his fingers through his hair as he says, âI mean, how could I have said no? I wouldâve looked like an asshole. Besides, Mingyu and I are college friends. Thereâs no reason for me to prohibit him from this trip. Like, at all.â
âYeah, you and Mingyu are college friends but, ultimately, itâs our trip, right? __ wouldâve understood if you said no.â Doyeon says, still not over her justification from a while ago.
âI know, I know. But still⊠I didnât want to say no to her.â Jungkook tells Doyeon, not having a lot to say more than that.
Itâs the plain truth, anyway. He truly, simply does not want to say no to you. Not ever.
âBut JungkookâŠâ Nayeon interrupts. âWould it be okay for you? We know how you feel about the whole â er â Mingyu thing. Can you really take them being close together? Especially on a trip for your birthday?â
Though Nayeonâs voice is soft and her gaze gentle, her words hit him like a ton of bricks.
Truthfully, he doesnât know what to feel about the whole thing. You dating Mingyu is one thing, but you bringing him along on your trips is another. It means that heâs it.
That youâre getting serious.
He hates himself for hating the idea. Jungkookâs always wanted to be nothing but supportive of you. Heâd done it perfectly well with Eunwoo before, and your flings in the past four years have never upgraded past to being solely flings so he never worried about them, but now with Mingyu⊠itâs hard to pretend like itâs not killing him when you talk about how much you like him.
You have that lovestruck look on your face when Mingyu comes up in a conversation. For the first time in a while, you look genuinely happy. Jungkook always thought that your feelings for Eunwoo still lingered over the past few years â and how could it not, when you were literally engaged to him for a year? You told him one time that he may have been your greatest love⊠and he fears that it might be the same with Mingyu.
Where does that exactly leave him?
âWhat I think doesnât really matter. And itâs just for week.â he murmurs, but the others hear it anyway.
âAn excruciating week, you mean.â Doyeon says. She stands up from her chair. âYou know what, Iâm over this whole thing. Iâve witnessed you pine over her for whole eight years â and Iâm just â Iâm moving on from this. And I have a surgery. Iâm going out.â
Jungkook grimaces when Doyeon heads towards the door.
âDoyeon, donât be mean to Jungkook. Heâs trying his best, you know? The timing is just not right andââ
âWhat timing?â
As soon as Doyeon twisted the doorknob, pulling the door open to completely head out, you came barging in, cutting off Nayeonâs words.
Her eyes widen a little at your sudden arrival. And Jungkook scrambles to think of an effort to swerve the subject, but Taehyung beats him to it.
â__, heyyy,â he prolongs the word quite unnaturally, chuckling at the end of it for no reason. Jungkook internally notes to tell him later never dare try to save anything ever again.
That makes you furrow your brows in confusion. Directing your look to Doyeon who stopped on her tracks, you ask her instead, âWhatâs going on? What about Jungkook trying his best?â
Doyeon looks at Jungkook and then you. You wait, but then she just rolls her eyes â just completely done about the whole thing. Like she said earlier.
âHeâs trying his best not to be a pussy â well, allegedly.â At that, she goes out of the room, ignoring your calls to pull her back in.
âUh⊠I think I have a surgery in twenty. See you guys around. Gotta scrub in.â Taehyung jumps from the other bed and Jungkook makes sure to extend his leg forward so that the older guy trips on it as he walks. âWhat the fuck, man.â Taehyung looks at him, offense written all over his face.
Jungkook gives him a glare. Taehyung chooses to ignore it rather than prolong it and walks past you at the door.
âBye, fuckers.â
âDonât call me a fucker!â Nayeon chimes in but Taehyungâs already out of the room.
âHey, seriously! What was that?â You head towards the bed where Jungkook and Nayeon are, situating yourself on the far end of the bed to lean on the frame. You take off your sneakers in one swift move and lay your feet on Jungkookâs lap.
âItâs nothing. You know how Doyeon always bullies meâŠâ Jungkook says, ignoring the tingling sensation that starts to creep up his spine at the way you casually initiate physical contact.
He needs to get a grip. You most probably donât really mean anything by it.
âShe does not bully you.â Nayeon rolls her eyes beside him.
âYou probably deserve it.â you say, pulling out and eating some strawberry yogurt.
Nayeon laughs at your remark, but then itâs cut short when a pager suddenly beeps. Instantly, all of you take out your own and check if it was yours.
âAlright, thatâs my call.â
âBye. Good luck.â You say, offering your cup to Nayeon, but she only shakes her head. Meanwhile, Jungkook gives her a pair of thumbs up.
When Nayeon leaves the room, you nudge Jungkook with your foot.
âHey,â
Jungkook looks at you with a brow raised.
âCan you rub my foot? Please rub my foot.â You say, making the best rendition of puppy face, extending your sock-cladded foot in his direction.
He scoffs. âDo you think Iâm a pushover?â
You gasp dramatically. âI do not! I think youâre a cool person whoâd totally give me foot rubs.â
âUnfortunately, Iâm not a cool person who would give you foot rubs.â
You groan. âI gave you a massage weeks ago.â
âThat was, like, two months ago.â Jungkook says drily.
âIt counts because you didnât do anything to repay me for my kindness.â
âOh, you need your kindness paid back?â Jungkook teases, wiggling his eyebrows at you.
You pout at him and then whine. âPlease, just three minutes, I swear. Iâll even put up a timer.â
Indeed, Jungkook is a pushover. Pushover to your cute pout and every request. Again, he could just not find it in himself to say no to you. Not even in his wildest dreams.
But itâs never not fun to tease you before he relents. âFine. Two minutes.â He says, pretending to begrudge the thought of giving you a foot massage, even though inside, heâs quite thrilled to be doing so.
It would be a lie to say that it isnât one of his favorite past times in the quiet evenings of your apartment. Jungkook loves the weight of your leg on his lap, loves the way you thank him in between groans, and loves that he just gets to be close to you in almost such an intimate way.
âYour feet stink.â Jungkook decides to tease, scrunching his nose, feigning disgust.
âDonât lie. Also, your feet stink even more, donât try me.â
âMy feet do not stink.â
âLetâs just agree to disagree,â You grin. âIâm starting a timer.â You say, grabbing your phone, pressing some stuff on it before you put it on the mattress.
âLet me see, for all I know, you set it to five instead of three.â
You look at him with widen eyes, stiffening.
âItâs three minutes.â
âYour nostrils are flaring, youâre lying.â
You groan. âPlease. Dinner is on me later.â
That obviously catches Jungkookâs attention.
âYouâre staying at home for the night?â
You look at him weird. âYeah, of course. Whatâs with that face?â
Jungkook shakes his head, hides a small smile as he looks down to your feet on his lap and takes a hold of one. He takes off your sock for you and begins massaging the tendons of your foot, noting the way you immediately lean back and relax.
âNothing. I just thought youâd be staying at Mingyuâs again.â
âAh,â you nod your head. When Mingyu's name is mentioned, you visibly frown. Itâs the kind of face that you make when youâre deep in thought. âI was supposed to. But I donât know⊠we fought this morning.â
Jungkook raises a brow. âYou wanna talk about it?â
You shrug. âNot really. Itâs a weird argument. I donât know.â
He wants so badly to poke around and find out⊠but somehow, thereâs something in him that tells him not to bother.
Anyway, youâre going home tonight so thatâs all that matters. Jungkook begins to think about what to eat for dinner⊠heâd love to cook something, nevermind that heâs tired from his overnight shift yesterday. He also only got around four total hours of sleep in the past 48 hours, and that was not even consecutive hours â just the sum. That is why he was in the on-call rooms, until Taehyung suddenly barged in, followed by Doyeon, Nayeon, and then you.
âOhâ there, thatâs so good, Jungkook,â you say after a particularly hard press against the ball of your heel.
Jungkook knows better than to let his mind wander upon hearing that from you. Heâs massaging you, of course that was gonna be the natural reaction.
Itâs also quite pathetic to be even thinking about it in the first place â considering that your mind might most likely be weighed by yours and Mingyuâs argument â your boyfriend.
âHey, about what I said a few days ago,â you started to speak again, breaking the momentary silence. Jungkook hums to acknowledge you. âI know you said yes to me bringing Mingyu along, but, uh, Iâm not sure if he still plans to.â
âAh,â Jungkook nods. Was the argument that bad? âOkay.â
âYeah. He has to fly over to Arizona for something that week. Told me he may be able to arrive and join us on the second day, which is the exact date of your birthday, but honestly, Iâm not sure. His sched changes a lot.â
Deep down, Jungkook wishes Mingyu just opts out of joining in altogether.
But he doesnât have to tell you that.
âThatâs a shame.â he comments, not really meaning it. He massages your other foot with ginger hands, which has you letting out soft sighs again. Jungkook buries them in the back of his head, lest his mind goes to territories that are absolutely humiliating.
âI knowâŠâ you trail off. You look like you have more to say as well, but then the door to the room opens. Again.
âForgot my pager.â Doyeon announces, crossing the room with quick steps to reach for the forgotten thing she left on the table.
When Doyeonâs gaze falls back to the both of you, she raises a brow, and then her eyes direct their way towards Jungkookâs hands on your foot.
Youâre about to say something when Doyeon rolls his eyes at Jungkook. Then, without giving you the opportunity to speak, she heads out of the room quickly, leaving Jungkook to look in another direction in quiet shame.
âWhat was that?â You comment, confused at what just happened.
âEh, sheâs in a sour mood today. Itâs regular Doyeon.â Shrugs Jungkook, trying to swerve the subject.
You pout. âAre you two fighting again for real?â
Jungkook chuckles. âNo, itâs not serious. You know how Doyeon and I get.â
You squint your eyes, but say nothing nonetheless.
Meanwhile, Jungkook hisses internally.
Jungkook gets Doyeon. You all have been friends since freshman year of med school â the founder of your study group â and she was also the first one to find out about Jungkookâs little crush. He didnât even have to say it explicitly, she just knew. Eventually, Jungkook told Taehyung. He has quite a big mouth, unfortunately, so when you started your internship at the hospital â he lets it slip in a conversation with Nayeon who was just becoming your friend that time â leading the situation to where it is right now.
Out of all of them, though, Doyeon got it pretty hard. Sheâs witnessed the early stages of Jungkookâs infatuation towards you in the first semester of med school, had to keep quiet during study sessions. She was even supportive that time, telling Jungkook to just go for it â but then Eunwoo happened, and the confession never saw the light of day.
When they broke up, Doyeon became hopeful again, just as Jungkook was. But you were showing no signs of moving on and Jungkook had no choice but to step back for a bit.
The past two years, though, Doyeon became more insistent, telling him youâre single and itâs the fattest chance Jungkook can ever get.
But sheâs right, after all. Jungkookâs a pussy. He hides his feelings well â a pro at the sport, really, at this point.
When Mingyu happened a few months ago, Doyeonâs just over it. She told Jungkook one time in a drinking session that the ship has sunk and heâs going to be in his sixties regretting not ever confessing to you. Sometimes, he wakes up at night in sweat from a nightmare that involved Doyeon murdering him because of his emotional constipation.
Jungkook knows she just wants the best for him â even though sheâs more on showing him tough love instead of a gentle one. Doyeonâs always been like that, but sheâs a good friend. When things went haywire, she was there to genuinely sympathize with him and console him â together with Taehyung and some of his other friends.
But in Jungkookâs defense, Doyeon just also doesnât get it.
Itâs so easy to just say fuck it and make a confession already, so easy to think about how things could turn positively â but sheâs not â theyâre not â in Jungkookâs shoes. They will never be.
So many things could go wrong if he ever were to listen to his heart. Sure, heâs had the chance over the past four years â most would say that. But itâs not a chance when youâve spent half of it moving on from Eunwoo. Itâs not a chance when you spent the other half trying to go on dates and fail â each one making you more miserable about your love life, as you told him so many nights ago in those rare special moments in the balcony of your apartment.
Those four years you were single was never a chance â not when you never showed any bit of interest.
Itâs the reality that his friends always somehow miss when encouraging him to confess his feelings.
Youâre friends for almost a decade now â eight years to be exact â but not once did you ever hint at wanting to be in a relationship with him. Your reaction to that always involved a disgusted expression and a variation of âNo way!â. Might be a joke just to tease him â but also might be rooted in something genuine deep down.
Jungkook likes to think that physically, he doesnât look so bad. Heâs nice when he wants to be, especially towards people he cares about. Heâs a resident surgeon who makes enough. Could be funny, charming⊠whatever.
Most of all, he likes to think he could deserve you one of these days. That he could be the man that youâre searching for.
But itâs been eight years and youâve never once looked at him like how he surely does at you.
God knows how many times Jungkook has tried to move on â how many sleepless nights he has trying to erase the feeling of so much longing for you. Sometimes, it works, when heâs on his casual dates and hook-up with all those women that thankfully fancied him enough. He momentarily forgets about your laugh and your hair and the crinkles on the sides of your eyes when you smile and your soft hands and your gentle voice â but it cracks when the sex is done and heâs staring at the blank ceiling of his dateâs apartment, hating himself for yet again seeing your picture in his memory when heâs buried in somebody else, wishing it was you instead.
It hurts so badly. Especially when you seem to look at everybody else except him. You wanted to weed out someone for you â meanwhile, heâs just right under your nose, and yet you donât see him. Itâs at this point, when you have Mingyu as your boyfriend now, that Jungkook is starting to realize that you donât see him not because you canât, but because you choose not to.
Regardless, he knows you love him. Knows you care about him on a deeper level. Would probably sacrifice a bit of your time to tend to him if he needs it. But itâs the kind of love thatâs not comparable to the one he has for you. Jungkookâs feelings encompass every single kind of love a human could have for another being â but you only have one kind for him. The platonic kind.
And even though itâs painful to face the reality of that very idea, Jungkook thinks that maybe⊠just maybe⊠Mingyuâs actually it.
Mingyu wasnât exactly a saint the last time Jungkook saw him, but people change and the way you seem so genuinely happy these days tells Jungkook that maybe Mingyuâs another version of himself now â the better one who will never hurt you or make you cry.
Maybe this is what loveâs all about. Youâre content with seeing them happy, even if itâs not with you.
Jungkook thinks that as he steals a glance at you looking at your phone â most probably playing that landlord game on your phone youâve been obsessed with the past few weeks â and youâre so beautiful like this. Even when youâre probably running on limited hours of sleep just like him.
Your hair is put up in that tulip hairclip you have a lot of, stray hairs framing some parts of your face. But he sees your features just fine â notes the way they are structured so perfectly it truly awes him that men and women didnât beg for your attention whenever you went out in public.
Because he would. He did. He does. He always teases you for the purpose of your reaction⊠because Jungkook likes it when you pay attention to him. So much that it kills him to think that maybe, that attention will die soon as you and Mingyu get closer as another week passes by.
The timer that goes off on your phone snaps Jungkook out of his thoughts, and you look at him with widened eyes.
âDonât stââ
âItâs my turn now,â Jungkook cuts you off and gently places your legs on the mattress, bringing his own on the soft surface as well.
You jut your bottom lip out â and Jungkook feels himself wanting to give in.
âFive minutes is so quick.â You say, but nonetheless takes his shin to your lap.
Jungkook tries hard to sway the butterflies in his stomach at your touch.
âFavor for a favor, remember?â He teases, lifting one of his foot to your direction.
You pretend to gag. âI hate you.â
Jungkook laughs, quite boisterously. Because he knows you donât mean it. I hate you basically just means I love you but youâre annoying me right now in your own little dictionary â and he always gets giddy whenever you tell him that â as weird as it may sound.
But Jungkook likes this, though.
Sure, it would be so fucking great if he could just confess and lay out his cards all at once, but the chances of you not taking it well is too big â and even though Jungkookâs usually a risk taker, he couldnât ever risk you all over his dead body.
He can keep his hurt to himself over you feeling anything but romantic towards him â because if he confesses and you donât feel the same way, he knows damn well that heâll lose you completely.
And the thought makes him shudder.
That probably catches your sight, so you ask him about it.
Jungkook tells you itâs the AC.
[ DAY 1 | August 31st, 11:04am ]
The beating sun feels uncomfortable on Jungkookâs skin, but thereâs no way heâs wasting a day like this holed up in the villa he and his friends chipped in to rent. It costed you all a shit ton of money â might as well enjoy every waking day he gets to spend here.
Itâs why he decides to goad Taehyung and Nayeon into coming with him along the shore where sun loungers are lined up to accommodate the few visitors who were also at the resort. He tried to convince Doyeon, but she goes straight to sleep as soon as the rooms were assigned.
He gets it â you all did travel by plane instead of car (because that would've taken you twelve hours) and Doyeon gets airsick whenever she rides in a plane. Jungkook also tried to talk you into it, but you said you were just going to lounge about by the pool at the villa and follow after a while.
Your âafter awhileâ takes about thirty minutes, and Jungkook thinks youâre missing all the fun, especially when Nayeon and Taehyung are starting to strip off their clothes to submerge themselves in the ocean.
With his loaded watergun, he goes straight back to the villa, and it doesnât take much time to spot you by the terrace, lying down on a sun lounger with your big hat and sunglasses on, a book opened in your hands.
Unsuspecting, you let out a sudden squeal when Jungkook presses the trigger of the toy in his grip, a spring of water meeting your bare legs. Jungkook obviously tries hard to ignore that youâre wearing a flimsy pair of white bikinis. He saw you pack it two days ago⊠and he remembers taking too long to move on from the image heâs conjured up in his head upon seeing it.
âJungkook!â
He chuckles at your reaction, poorly hiding the watergun behind him. âWhat?â
âIâll kill you.â You seethe, your body coming forward to sit upright, hastily taking your sunnies off so he can see the cute glare on your face.
âWhat are you going to do? I have this,â He points to his weapon. âAre you challenging me into a hand-to-hand combat?â Jungkook teases, wiggling his eyebrow.
You groan. Then, you lay back on the lounger again, opening your book, deciding to ignore him.
Jungkook canât have that, of course. So, he walks closer to your direction, stopping beside you, effectively blocking the sun and in turn, dimming the light source of your book.
âYouâre blocking my sun.â You say, looking up at him.
âYouâll get all the sun you want if you haul your ass off to the shore. Come on, weâre all swimming in there,â he tries to convince you, nudging your thigh with his knee.
You give him a pout. You sound whiny when you say, âBut itâs too hot.â
âThatâs why weâll get in the water.â
âDonât be sassy.â You roll your eyes. âI meant the water would be way too hot.â
âItâs not, Nayeon said so.â
You glance at the pool across from you. âWhy canât we all just swim in here?â
Jungkook deadpans. âBecause this is a five-foot pool and absolutely no one will enjoy it.â
You frown at him, quietly telling Jungkook heâs right.
âUgh,â you groan. âBut Iâll have to reapply SPF firstâŠâ You grab the bottle of lotion thatâs just placed on the small table on the side of the lounger. Then you look at him with squinted eyes, âDid you wear sunscreen?â
Jungkook rolls his eyes but nonetheless says yes, knowing how you always nag him about it whenever you guys are at the beach. Itâs not even just him. Itâs also with your other friends.
He watches as you rub lotion over your body, but when you get to the back, you look up at him and extend the bottle towards his way.
âCan you help me with this, please?â You say.
Jungkook automatically takes the bottle but it takes him a full five seconds to understand what youâre getting at.
Youâre asking him to put sunscreen on your back. Youâre very naked back that sports nothing but the tiny strings of your bikini holding your chest.
Of course, you donât notice his dilemma. Twisting in your seat so that your back faces him, you gather your hair to the side, obviously waiting for him to do your request.
But Jungkookâs distracted behind your back. Heâs distracted at how smooth it looks under the scorching sun and how easy it would be to paint it with something other than the natural color of your skin.
Itâs not even the first time heâll do this â youâve been to trips before and putting on sunscreen over your friend is about as natural as it gets like how he would do it as well to Taehyung or even Doyeon or Nayeon if they ask to.
But it doesnât mean it doesnât affect him one bit when it comes to you.
Needless to say, his mind is pre-occupied as he sits down behind you where you left some space for him to sit, squirting the lotion into the palms of his hands, gingerly spreading it over your back once he got it.
âBe sure to cover everything,â you say, obviously not aware about Jungkookâs mental crisis behind your back.
He thinks itâs worth the crisis over though, as youâre so soft under his touch. Jungkook kneads the span of your back, squeezes your waist lightly to even out the cream, and makes sure to put it over your shoulders as well. When his hands fall, he hesitates.
âShould I â uhââ
âYeah, just go under the strings.â You tell him before he can even finish.
Thereâs a lump in his throat that he swallows before he goes under the strings of your bikini top, his heart doing funny somersaults against his ribcage as he spreads the lotion over your skin. It guilts him to no end that his mind thinks about how heâs just inches away from your breasts.
He retreats his hand right away. âDone.â
You turn back to him. âThanks. You want me to do yours?â
âSure.â
Jungkook sits on the edge of the lounger and lets his back turn to you. He hears the cap of the lotion bottle being opened again and soon your hands are lathering the cream over the expanse of his back.
Itâs embarrassing the way he lets himself savor the seconds of your every touch. Embarrassing the way his mind zeroes in on the way your soft hands caress the tendons of his back muscles. He thinks about the weight, how good this feels; your hands on him. Suddenly, thereâs a zap of electricity that goes through his spine, and then he feels it.
The twitch in his dick and the blood that he feels rushing to it.
âOkay, youâre done.â You say, tapping his back twice so he can turn to you.
It snaps him out of his thoughts, but his dick is thinking about something else and as he subtly looks down, thereâs already a growing semi on the crotch of his trunk shorts.
Jungkook curses himself internally, shutting his eyes close in slight frustration.
Fucking uncooperative dick.
He stands up from the chair when you nudge his back with your foot, thinking that heâd see you coming along in a few seconds. But you donât, and as he turns his heel to look at you, youâre back in your cozy lying position on the lounger, with your book opened, just like how he saw you when he came in a while ago.
Jungkook parts his lips in disbelief, but also finding the whole thing funny.
âYou minx.â He muses, playfully squinting his eyes at you upon realizing the trick you just pulled.
âEnjoy the beach, Jungkook. Send my regards to Taehyung and Nayeon.â You say, giving him a taunting flying kiss. âAnd thank you for reapplying my sunscreen.â
Jungkook chuckles at your remark, and just like that, he forgets about his stubborn dick, and goes over back to you, blocking your sun once again.
âYouâre blocking my sun againâ Jungkook!â
Itâs predictable the way you hurl a series of creative curses at him as Jungkook forcefully picks you up from the chair, knocking your hat and your book on the ground as he hoists you against his shoulder, carrying you upside down like a sack of potatoes.
âJungkook, I swear to god!â You squeal, repeatedly slapping his back as he walks to the direction of the shore, but Jungkookâs nothing but a solid muscle, firm over his hold on the back of your legs.
âBe quiet.â He says, chuckling at your sounds of opposition.
âI hate you, youâre such a prick, ugh!â
He picks up his walking pace and you scream again when you see the ocean water from your view.
Jungkook chuckles as you continue to plant your fists on his back, and when the water reaches his knees, he throws you in it.
âFuck. You!â You say, glaring at Jungkook in the middle of his uncontrollable laughter.
âCome on, Taehyung and Nayeon are over there,â he points to the deeper part of the ocean a few feet from where you are, and when you turn your head, you see Taehyung and Nayeon with their floaties.
âUghâŠâ Jungkook hears you groan before you follow behind him. When Jungkook looks back, he sees you paddling around the water like some puppy, and he snickers to himself. That earns him a splash on his way, with you rolling your eyes at him.
âJungkook! __!â Yells Nayeon over their direction, waving her hand around. Taehyung and her are perched on the big floatie they fought over with at the villa earlier.
âJungkook,â calls you behind him.
Youâre starting to cross the deeper part of the ocean and itâs within Jungkookâs chest now. Meanwhile, your friends are still about a few feet away, so the level would definitely be on his neck by the time. Youâre considerably tall, but Jungkookâs still half a head taller than you, so when he looks back at you, the waterâs already reached your shoulders.
âThis is way too deep!â You complain.
âDonât be a pussy, __!â Comments Taehyung from afar.
âFuck off,â you murmur and then beckons Jungkook to you. âHelp me a bit here.â
Jungkook shakes his head, chuckling as he moves a few steps back to get to your direction.
âYou big baby, you never learned how to swim, have you?â He teases, playfully clicking his tongue.
âWhat for?â You say when he gets near.
Jungkook feels pleased with himself about you asking for his help to cross the deeper part of the ocean, but heâs met with surprise when you heavily plant your palms on his shoulders, causing him to be out of balance and tripping over his feet under the water.
It causes a misstep and he nearly chokes as he comes back up for air again only to see you laughing your ass off. Nayeon and Taehyung are also laughing along, even from afar, and Jungkook wipes the back of his hand over his eyes to see clearly.
âThatâs for throwing me in the water earlier,â you say in between your snickers and Jungkookâs just about to say something back when you suddenly wrap your hands around his neck from the back, your legs locking around his waist. âCarry me to the floatie, pretty please,â you say against his cheek in a sing-song voice.
With that, Jungkook feels your whole entire body against his back, your breasts pressing against his skin. He ignores the way the physical contact makes his body tingle, and he hopes you donât notice his blush when he raises his arms to hold the back of your legs.
âOnly because youâre annoying.â He pretends to sound annoyed, but the laugh that comes out of you at the remark makes him smile anyway.
[ DAY 1 | August 31st, 11:35pm ]
Your daytime activities at the beach included jetskiing â one that knocked Taehyung off the water way too many times that he just gave up halfway through it. When Doyeon woke up a little later in the afternoon, all of you decided to get food from the dining hall and ate your hearts out at the buffet.
The day ended with all of you back in your assigned rooms again. Since you rented a two-bedroom villa, Jungkookâs rooming with Taehyung in the secondary bedroom while Nayeon, Doyeon, and you are all inside the primary one since itâs bigger.
Itâs past thirty minutes to eleven in the night when somebody knocks on Jungkookâs shared bedroom with Taehyung. When Jungkook looks at him from across the room, heâs knocked out on the sofa, soft snores coming out from his mouth. Him and Jungkook decided to take turns with the bed itself throughout the whole vacation. Thereâs an extra cushion Taehyung couldâve laid on the floor, but he was way too tired to set it up and to even care â looks like he doesnât really need it, though, since he looks so peaceful in his position.
Grumbling, Jungkook gets out from the sheets, scratching his bare chest and rubbing the back of his head as he walks over to the door to open it.
When he does, heâs welcomed by the sight of you in your big grey hoodie and some shorts.
âWear something.â You say as soon as you take in his appearance.
Jungkookâs habit of going to sleep with only his boxers knows no bounds. Even when itâs below 20 degrees Celsius outside, he always opts out of his pajamas, choosing to go bare in his sheets instead. In his defense for now, the duvet is thick and it provided him with enough protection against the cold of the AC and the summer night.
âWhat are you doing here?â He says as he trudges back inside the room to wear a pair of sweatpants hanging from the chair.
âRude.â You comment, following him in the room. You look at Taehyungâs passed out state in the couch. âHeâs going to wake up in the evening tomorrow and miss your birthday.â
That makes Jungkook smirk, remembering Taehyungâs high energy in the morning.
âNo consequences. Itâs vacation week.â Jungkook raises his eyebrows. âSeriously, what brought you here? Itâs almost midnight.â
You sit on the edge of the bed. Thatâs when Jungkook notices the black plastic youâre carrying in your hand. âItâs not that late. Letâs head out for a bit.â
He raises a brow, confused. âWhere to?â
âYouâre going to find out. Wear a jacket, itâs a bit cold outside.â You say as you stand up from the bed again, heading for the door.
Jungkookâs confusion just grows with passing seconds. Nonetheless, he canât say heâs not intrigued.
Unsure, he goes for his small luggage and takes out the only hoodie he packed. Itâs grey as well, matching the one you have on. Jungkook tries to shake that thought off his head as you both quietly head out of the room.
Itâs late into the night and when you head out of the villa, thereâs not many people hanging along the shore anymore.
âFollow me,â you tell him, and Jungkook does.
It may have been his drowsiness that kept him quiet throughout the whole walk â just quietly following along with you, your rented villa no longer in his line of sight. Jungkook couldnât exactly pinpoint where you currently are, but this side of the beach is a bit rocky, and much, much colder. He feels it even through the thick material of his hoodie.
âWeâre here.â You announce, a proud lilt to your voice. Jungkook bumps with your back when you suddenly stop on your tracks. It prompts a chuckle from you, turning back to him so Jungkook sees the crinkles on the sides of your eyes as you do so.
It makes his lips curl. âWhatâs this?â He curiously asks, looking around.
Your grin grows wider. âWeâre gonna take those stairs and itâs gonna lead us to some pretty view.â Jungkook looks to the direction you pointed at, seeing the stairs you just referred to. Still unsure, he glances back at you. You laugh. âYou remember when Doyeon and I went out for a walk earlier for a bit? We found this place.â
Jungkook nods. âI see. Thought for a second there you found a place to dispose my body at.â
You snort as you take Jungkookâs wrist to hold on to as you climb to the stairs.
âI wonât do it as such a public place.â
âSo, you really are thinking about it in the first place.â Jungkook nods his head, guiding your back up the jagged stairs. You manage to get to the smoother surface and Jungkookâs quick to follow you towards the straight path of the narrow walkway.
âItâs my favorite past time, really.â You look back at him cheekily, a playful grin painting your lips. Jungkook scoffs.
The hallway is colonnaded with some flags, and thereâs an edge where the concrete stops, the ocean water splashing against the big rocks beneath the broken bridge.
You set aside the black plastic youâve been carrying around and Jungkook realizes theyâre Smirnoffs. Sitting on the concrete, you let your feet hang on the edge.
âHey, be careful,â Jungkook comments as he sees you do that. This part of the ocean isnât necessarily far â where you were earlier when you were swimming was far deeper, but still, it could be dangerous if you make a mistake. Jungkook wonders what the designers of the beach thought about when they made this plan.
âCome on, donât be fussy. Sit here with me.â You say, patting the space beside you.
Jungkook follows, of course, and you scoot to the side a little to give him more room.
âItâs nice, right,â You look at him, cocking your head to the side.
Jungkook feels the breeze of cool wind passing, and itâs a bit strong that it moves his fringes and yours as well. You put your hair up as usual in that big metal clip you always wear, but some strands of your hair escape and they frame your face.
With your big hoodie on and smile, Jungkook thinks you look extra cozy. He may have been hot and bothered by your bikini ensemble earlier, but now heâs bothered for another reason. He canât stop thinking about cuddling you under the night sky full of stars at the very moment.
âFeels good.â Jungkook comments. He plants his palms on the hard surface of the concrete behind him, leaning back as he looks to your side. âYou wanted to drink here?â
âOh, yeah,â You say, twisting your body a little to pick up the plastic cellophane. You take out two bottles of Smirnoffs and offer one to him which he gladly takes. Taking a bottle opener out, youâre about to open your drinks when Jungkook offers to do it for the both of you. You donât protest, just let him do his thing, smiling when he hands you your Smirnoff.
âThis is really nice.â Jungkook sighs after he takes the first sip, looking straight ahead to the mountainous view in front of you.
You hum, seemingly enjoying the moment as well. Jungkook takes a quick glance at your side profile and then quickly looks back ahead when he feels you do the same.
âWhyâd you bring me here?â He asks.
âNothing. I couldnât sleep, and I thought I could bring you here. So.â You shrug.
Jungkook nods.
âIâm turning thirty-one tomorrow. Or, in an hour, actually.â He says, automatically looking at his wrist but then realizing he took off his watch and left it at the bedside table. He didnât take his phone with him either.
âI know. Youâre so old now.â You tell him with a teasing tone in your words.
âFuck off,â he snorts. âIâm only a year older than you.â
âHmm⊠still old. Imagine, you turn fifty, I would still be forty-nine.â
Jungkook laughs at that.
âWhatever makes you sleep at night, babe.â He lets the pet name slip, and he did not mean to. It just rolled off his tongue for some reason. Quite easily, too.
You donât seem to care â or even notice â as you chuckle.
Thereâs a comfortable silence that hangs in the air again when Jungkook decides to break it.
âHey, I really appreciate you for coming along. You and the gang, really. This is a really good trip so far.â
You give him a smile as you look at him. Itâs one of those pretty ones that are a bit small but thereâs a certain shine to your eyes and Jungkook just really loves looking at you with a smile on your face. Youâre so pretty, he thinks heâs so lucky to even get the chance to look at you.
âYou know we all need this trip, right? I think itâs all our first time vacationing in two years.â
He nods, chuckling to himself. Itâs true. The last time was the Thailand trip and it felt like eons ago. Being a resident surgeon means less free time for leisure â and so you always make sure to spend your days off wisely. Even this trip took a lot of pre-planning to be possible just so all of your schedules would match.
âItâs crazy, thoughâŠâ you say suddenly.
Jungkook cocks a brow at you. âWhatâs crazy?â
âThat weâve known each other for like â what? Eight years?â
Eight years and four months to be exact. Jungkookâs not keeping count â he just will never forget the exact moment he met you for the very first time.
Itâs truly one of his core memories â knowing you. He remembers having to pass by the law library to meet Jimin â one of his closest friends who was studying law at the same grad school as him at the time. They were planning to eat out for lunch, but then he saw a woman at the individual study areas with a reading material thatâs familiar with his. Netterâs Atlas of Human Anatomy. You wore that maroon hairclip you loved so much during first year (Jungkook remembers you losing it in the second semester and how he bought you another one in your birthday), and when you looked up from your book for awhile, taking a break from taking notes on your iPad, that was when Jungkook saw your face and he nearly falls over back then.
Itâs common knowledge among your mutual friends and acquaintances that youâre pretty. Itâs the first thing that Jungkook noticed about you, the reason why he harbored an instant crush. That pretty much turned into⊠well â something deeper as the years passed by and he got to know you more than just your beautiful physical appearance.
He found it strange at the time to find somebody who was obviously a med student studying at the law library, but he soon found out it was because you didnât like studying at the med lib, said you felt too much pressure being among your fellow med students. Jungkook understood that in a spiritual level, and so when you became friends, you studied a lot at the law lib, until you met Doyeon and she formed a study group. It wasnât long before Taehyung joined the equation.
Looking back at it, Jungkook thinks itâs surreal. How knowing you led to him knowing more people that would soon be important in his life up until the age of thirty-one.
âAlmost a decade.â He says, canât help but smile at the thought.
âRight? It feels so surreal sometimes that we all knew each other at, like, twenty-three and twenty two. And now weâre in our thirties.â
âWhen you put it like thatâŠâ Jungkook trails off, laughing at how young you actually were eight years ago.
âYeah, I know!â You giggle. You look ahead, then you laugh again to yourself. Jungkook looks at you in confusion, giving you a questioning look at your sudden burst of laughter. Looking at him, you shake your head, âThis is a bit of a TMI, but I was twenty-two when I entered med school, so I just lost my virginity three years ago. You know whatâs funny? Iâve always thought I would lose my virginity, at like, thirty. Or twenty-seven. But that was even way too early for me.â
Jungkook almost splutters at the way you casually bring it up. He takes the bottle of Smirnoff away from him and looks at you with a chuckle. âLosing your virginity at nineteen is common.â
âWell, did you? Lose yours at nineteen?â You arch a brow.
âNope.â Jungkook shakes his head, tipping his head back to drink again.
âYounger?â You ask again.
Jungkook chuckles at your curiosity. Much to your surprise, he shakes his head again. âNah. Junior year. I just turned twenty-one. Lost it with my first girlfriend.â
Your lips part and Jungkook meets your shocked stare, brow cocked upwards.
âYouâre fucking with me.â
âWhat? No, Iâm not.â He laughs. He gets your surprise, though. Taehyung couldnât believe it either when it came up in a random conversation.
You still look incredulous as you say, âYou mean, like you never dated until junior year of undergrad?â
Jungkook shakes his head once again. âYes, and noâŠ? I mean, I had a⊠sort of girlfriend? Back in highschool, yeah, but it was more of like a mutual crush thing rather than an official relationship. But yeah, never dated and never had sex âtil I found my first girlfriend in third year.â
You look at him suspiciously still, and Jungkook canât help but laugh even more at your reaction.
âI really donât believe you.â
âWhatâs so surprising about that?â Jungkook knows the answer, though. He sleeps around, and you know that. Itâs probably why you canât believe heâs only started having sex until third year of college.
Youâre quiet for a bit.
âSo⊠you and that girlfriend broke up, and thenâŠâ you trail off, letting him finish the pieces.
Jungkook chuckles, recalling some memories that he thought were already hidden well at the back of his head.
Jiyeon. Her name was Park Jiyeon, his first girlfriend. He was the one who ended things â and not because he didnât have feelings for her. It was the other way around.
âYeah,â Jungkook fills in. âDidnât date seriously after that.â
âUh⊠was it a bad break-up?â You say, and thereâs hesitance in your voice. When Jungkook looks at you, you open your mouth to take your question back, probably, but Jungkook just gives you a warm smile.
âYeah. It was bad. But I donât really think about it now.â
You nod. âI see.â You say, looking ahead at the ocean again. âYou dated⊠quite seriously again in our last year of med school, though.â
âSora?â
âYeah.â
Jungkook nods, remembering the only one-year relationship he had. Min Sora was a fashion magazine director at the time. Jungkook liked her as she did, but they had too many differences that lead to too many arguments. Sora ended things before the relationship dragged out. Jungkook was grateful for it. Theyâre casual as of now⊠good friends, maybe?
âI always wondered why she broke up with you.â You say quietly.
Jungkook doesnât expect that. âYou wondered about that?â
âYeah. I mean, you seemed like you were both really into each other, so I just thought⊠you know,â you shrug.
âAh. That,â Jungkook looks afar, recalling the day when she ended things with him. It had been because of the stress that the last year of med school brought â he likes to think that. But it was also during the time when Eunwoo proposed to you and what he thought was feelings forgotten for you came back resurfacing and Sora just⊠figured him out. She told him he loved you, and sheâs got no spare time to compete with that. Denying it at the time was futile â Sora was smart. A wise, independent woman. She ended the relationship herself before she got deeply hurt. Jungkook has always felt sorry about how things turned out. No, he doesnât regret the break-up â just regrets the way he hurt her â unintentionally â even though she didnât show it. âJust didnât work out, I guess.â
You nod again.
Silence sits in the air.
It feels a little strange to talk about these things now. Itâs not that you both never share these aspects about your lives to each other, but itâs the first time you ask him about Sora. He never really bothered to share, though, for the record.
From his periphery, he sees you taking your phone out from your pocket, then gasping.
Jungkook immediately looks at you to see whatâs wrong. You show him your phone and he notes nothing of significance first before you say, âItâs 12:01 am. Itâs September first!â
âOh.â
âHappy birthday, Kook.â You say, smiling at him, and itâs an underestimation for Jungkook to say he nearly gets blinded by it. You look so gorgeous in your happy smile, so genuine, so warm, so cozy in your big grey hoodie.
Jungkook wants so bad to plant his lips on yours right then and there, but he reminds himself that he canât do that. He reminds himself that youâre taken. That you like somebody else. The somebody else arriving tomorrow, as per your words earlier this day when he asked about Mingyu.
Still, it doesnât stop Jungkook from mirroring your smile.
âThank you.â
âAnd, before I forget,â you stuff your hands in the pocket of your hoodie and Jungkook watches as you take out a small rectangular box. As he pays you a glance, youâre a little bit shy, not looking straight into his eyes as you say, âUh. I saw this somewhere, and I thought youâd like it.â
You extend your hand to him and Jungkook lets go of his beer to take the velvety green box from you.
He feels jittery as he takes it in, caresses the ribbon first before opening it altogether.
Whatâs inside surprises him.
âIt didnât cost much so donât throw it away,â you say, uncharacteristically defensive. Jungkook canât see your expression, but he bets your thoughts are going haywire as it takes him awhile to say anything about your gift. You always get nervous when it comes to gifts. â... and anyway, itâs not even my real gift. My real gift is a hairdryer, so Iâm sure youâre gonna like that better. But itâs cute, right? You can hang it in your keyholder or somethingââ
â__,â Jungkook cuts you off, his eyes still on the keyring laying on the box. âYouâre giving this to me?â
âY-yeah. Itâs⊠uh⊠cute, right? I thought it was cute.â You say, and when Jungkook looks at you, he sees the adorable way your brows furrow.
He chuckles, looking at the keyring again. Itâs a silver Claddagh.
âDo you know what this means?â Jungkook asks.
âThe what?â
Jungkook points to the Claddagh. âThis symbol.â
You look away as you say, âNo, not really. I just thought itâs a cool keychain. You told me you like keychains, but I donât ever see you with a keychain. So.â
With your nostrils flaring a little, he knows youâre lying. You definitely know what the Claddagh symbol means.
But instead of goading you about it, Jungkook takes the keyring out of the box and hangs it over his finger, admiring the item.
âThank you. This is really cute, and I love it.â Jungkook tells you, giving you a soft smile.
You stare at him and then cave into a smile of your own. âIâm glad you do.â
Jungkook looks at the Claddagh again and smiles heartily.
His heart aches with so much yearning and longing when you go back to the villa that night, spending about three minutes staring at the Claddagh you gifted him that he immediately hangs in his key holder. Jungkook thinks heâs going to transfer it to his work bag or the back of his rearview mirror, but his keyholder would do for now.
You love him alright, certainly not the way he does, but itâs enough for him.
[ DAY 2 | September 1st, 11:55pm ]
It was not a secret among Nayeon, Doyeon, and Taehyung that Jungkookâs mood considerably plummeted down as soon as Mingyu called you early in the morning that heâd be landing in the afternoon.
Afternoon came, and he tried to suck it up like a grown man â and because as far as you know, theyâre both friends. And Mingyuâs your boyfriend. He should be nothing but supportive.
But it was especially hard when you gushed about being excited that he was finally here. Itâs been four months since you started seeing each other, two months since you officially dated, but somehow, Jungkook still could not process it.
He knows heâs being unfair. To you and to himself. But he couldnât help it. He couldnât help the feeling of ugly bitterness that sat in his heart as you told him about how Mingyu rented another villa so you both could room together, effectively taking you away from the rest of your friends.
Of course, you all spent his birthday together â doing tons of water activities in the ocean, eating at the dining hall, and roaming around for some more leisure time, but Jungkook could not help but think that ever since Mingyuâs arrived, youâve been sticking with him, even taking the time away from the gang to show your boyfriend around the resort.
Even at the villaâs porch where all of you took out your foldable chairs to drink outside, you were with Mingyu, perched on his lap, laughing at the jokes getting thrown around in the circle.
He tried not to look too much at how Mingyu comfortably wrapped one arm around your waist while the other held a drink, how you leaned into his touch, and how easily he blended with the group with his charm.
âWhereâd you get the ice cream?â Doyeon asked as Taehyung sat down on his chair with a small bowl of the sweet treat.
âFridge. Nayeon and I bought it earlier.â
âThereâs ice cream?â Mingyu asked, in which Taehyung nodded to. He turned to you. âDo you want it?â
Jungkookâs brows furrowed in confusion. â__âs lactose intolerant.â He noticed everybody suddenly looking at him. Feeling cornered, he drank from his beer to avoid their gazes.
Mingyu, obviously surprised by the declaration, glanced back at you. âBaby, you didnât tell me that?â
You winced. âItâs not really a big deal.â you waved him off and when you laugh.
âYeah, sheâs stubborn about it. She can inhale five cones in one sitting.â Taehyung said which made everybody laugh. Jungkook knew it was to lighten the mood. So, he laughed as well, even though from his periphery, he could see you giving him daggers through your eyes.
Jungkook doesnât know why you had to pretend it wasnât a big deal. Sure, Taehyungâs right about you not taking your lactose intolerance seriously sometimes, but youâve also gotten into a lot of trouble because of it, hence why youâve been making conscious efforts to not eat dairy.
The whole day leaves a sour impression on him with Mingyu around. Quite a shame, really, since he started his birthday so well with you taking him to the far-end of the beach to drink and give him a Claddagh.
When the night becomes much darker, Jungkook sits on the terrace near the pool all by himself. Everybodyâs fast asleep at this point. He doesnât know about you, though, âcause youâve probably transferred all your stuff to the other villa Mingyu rented around.
âHey,â
Jungkook looks at the embodied voice that suddenly calls. He sees itâs Doyeon.
âHey,â Jungkook smiles, taking the other bottle of beer on the coffee table and offering it to her.
She waves his hand. âNah, Iâve had enough for the whole day.â Doyeon situates herself on the folding chair next to Jungkook.
Jungkook nods, looking straight ahead to the pool. They sit in comfortable silence for a while until Doyeon speaks.
âHey, Iâm sorry for the last week,â
Jungkook glances at her with a small smile. âWhat for?â
âFor calling you a pussy. And just⊠being harsh. Had a tough week and your emotional constipation just pissed me off more. Youâre still a pussy, but I shouldnât have rubbed it off your face.â She says.
Jungkook stares at her with parted lips.
âWow. I donât know if thatâs an actual apology.â
âItâs an apology with a hundred percent realness, you know I donât baby anybody.â
âHah,â Jungkook scoffs, amused. âYeah. Well, youâre right, though. Todayâs beenâŠâ
Doyeon sighs. âItâs hard on you, right?â
Jungkook can only give her a meaningful smile.
âBut you donât exactly have the right to get jealous⊠sheâs not your girlfriend and you two are not anything,â Doyeon says, and it tugs at Jungkookâs heartstrings. Meanwhile, she looks ahead and continues to speak. âItâs hard when you have all these feelings for someone, but you have to hide it. You just want to show everybody they mean so much to you, but you canât. It sucks.â
Jungkook thinks sheâs still talking about his situation with you but then as he glances at her, she seems to be deep in thought. As if sheâs actually speaking from her own experience.
Heâs intrigued by that, of course.
âWoah, are you still talking about me?â
That seems to get Doyeon out of her trance.
She rolls his eyes. âWho else would I be talking about?â
Jungkook opens his mouth to say something. You guys have always had the theory that Doyeon has a secret boyfriend. Itâs silly at best but sometimes, he thinks itâs true. Doyeon has never been the type to wear her heart on her sleeve, though. Sheâs tough and sheâs frank a lot of times. But sheâs the kind of friend whoâd call you a bitch in your face but then would go to all the lengths to defend you from everybody.
âOkay.â Jungkook nods, dropping the subject.
âHas she told you yet?â Doyeon asks suddenly.
âWhat?â He mirrors back, knowing exactly who the she Doyeonâs referring to.
âSheâs planning to move in with him some of these days.â
âIâŠâ Jungkook stops, his mouth opening and closing like a fish in water. To say that heâs stunned is an understatement. Obviously, you havenât told him anything.
âYou donât know.â Doyeon says upon realization.
Jungkook shakes his head. âShe didnât tell me.â
Doyeon lets out a loud sigh. âItâs not really set in stone, though, thatâs what she said. But theyâre discussing it.â
âAh.â Jungkook nods and looks ahead at the pool. Another beat of silence, a sip of beer, and then he scoffs. âI really shouldâve confessed even way back then, huh?â He laughs but thereâs no humor in it.
Doyeon stares at him. âI didnât tell you about that so you can regret not telling your feelings for her earlier.â
âI didnâtââ
âI told you that so you can move on, Jungkook.â
Jungkook closes his mouth shut.
She looks away. âYou remember the time I liked you in med school?â
âDoyeonâŠâ Jungkookâs lips part, not at all expecting for her to bring that up. Itâs been so long ago and ever since⊠Doyeonâs confession, they never really talked about it again.
âOh my god, look at your face,â She laughs. âGod, do you think I still like you? I moved on the day after you rejected me.â
âI didnât reject you.â Jungkook defensively says.
She rolls her eyes. âI asked you if you were interested and you didnât say anything. You just looked at me like this,â Doyeon stiffens her body and widens her eyes in a comical rendition of Jungkookâs famous OJO face.
Jungkook canât help but scoff. âThat was the strangest confession that happened to me, though. You told me you liked me in the straightest face ever, I still think it was a cruel prank of some sort.â
Doyeon bursts into laughter, and Jungkook follows along, recalling that time.
âYeah⊠that was funny. But⊠it was real, not a prank at all. I donât remember why I liked you, though.â
Jungkook looks at her incredulously. âOkay, but thatâs actually the most hurtful thing youâve ever said to me.â
âDonât take it personally,â Doyeon rolls her eyes, but thereâs a smile on her lips still. âAnyway, I brought it up because that was the same day when I realized you like __. I mean, I had my suspicions, but I confirmed it around the time.â
Jungkook shakes his head. âWas really surprised when you told me that. I thought I hid it pretty well.â
âYeah, but not to me. You know, I donât even know how __ didnât figure it out herself. Youâd always follow her around and in our study sessions, you always stayed up late with her and was overly attentive. Whenever Taehyung asked you too much, you sort of like reached a point where you just told him to suck it up. But if it was __, you were so patient,â Doyeon giggles. âShe had a really hard time with Biochem. I remember you tutoring her all the time.â
âThat wasâŠâ Jungkook bows his head down, a bit embarrassed at being read like that. âShe cried a lot during first year.â
Doyeon purses her lips. âYeahâŠâ
Both stare ahead again, with nothing to say for a few more seconds. Jungkook continues to sip his bear while Doyeon quietly sits.
âI have this biased notion about Mingyu,â Doyeon speaks up. Jungkook looks at her she continues, âI keep on telling myself, heâs probably gonna fuck up anytime soon â and thatâs because deep inside, I still want you and __ together. You know Iâve always wanted you both to be together. Itâs hard to see __ struggling with her love life. She almost failed the internship when Eunwoo broke up with her, and I donât want her to go through that again as her friend. Itâs hard, because I canât do anything about it. I think of you, and how much you love her, and I think youâre good for her⊠but at the same time, I feel bad for thinking that. Because I can see that Mingyu makes her happy. Itâs different with the other guys she dated before him. Sheâs truly happy with him, and I find it hard to think that Mingyuâs gonna break her heart. He seems⊠nice⊠and that heâd be good for her, you know what I mean?â
Jungkookâs quiet, processing her words.
Doyeon sighs before she speaks again. âBut that hurts you in the process, doesnât it? Seeing her happy but not with you. Youâre both my friends and Iâm in the position where itâs hard for me to situate myself in a certain place. Because I want __ to be happy, but I also want you to be happy â but your happiness is interconnected and itâs⊠tricky. Itâs a tricky situation.â
Jungkook doesnât realize that heâs gripping the neck of the bottle quite tightly at Doyeonâs words, but he listens.
âI donât normally say things like this, Jungkook, but Iâm your friend so Iâm just gonna let this go,â Doyeon finally looks at him, and he meets her gaze. âIt hurts me to see you hurting like this. It hurts Taehyung and Nayeon as well, but they wonât say it. Just⊠just be⊠just be okay, please?â
Jungkook exhales a sharp, shaky breath.
He knows what Doyeon meant by that. Sheâs asking him to⊠find happiness on his own. Happiness that doesnât lie on __âs reciprocity because with the way things are going, thatâs impossible. Sheâs planning to move in with Mingyu, and most of all, she seems genuinely happy.
âI⊠I know. Thank you.â Jungkook says, not really knowing what to say.
Doyeon chuckles. âDo you want a hug?â
He looks at her with a smile. âI could use one right now, yeah.â
Doyeon laughs before standing up and going over to where Jungkook sits on his own sun chair. When she steps in front of him, Jungkook wraps his arms around her waist and lets himself rest the side of his head on her stomach, closing his eyes when Doyeon pats the crown of his head.
âBelated happy birthday, Jungkook.â
Jungkook chuckles. âThanks. Youâre unusually mushy today.â
Doyeon pinches his ear slightly which earns her a groan.
The two stay like that for a few more seconds when suddenly, Jungkook hears a familiar voice.
âOh, h-hey guys,â
Jungkook immediately looks ahead to see you standing from the other side of the terrace, looking at him and Doyeon. At that, Doyeon lets go of him, twisting her body to look in your direction. Jungkook retreats his arms back to his side and smiles to acknowledge you.
âI thought you were sleeping already.â He says.
âYeah, what brought you here?â Doyeon asks.
You approach them with unusually slow steps, as if reluctant. âLeft my wallet here. Just realized it a while ago,â you say. After that, you stop on your tracks. Your gaze falls between them with an unsure smile on your face. âYou two drinking?â
âNah, Jungkook is.â Doyeon says, pointing to the bottle of Smirnoffs on the small table beside Jungkookâs chair. Then, she looks under her own. âWhereâd you leave your wallet?â
âOver my chair earlier.â You give her a smile again. But somehow, it looks a bit awkward. A little forced. Jungkook knows you well enough to identify your smiles.
And as he looks at you longer, he realizes you have a certain color on your face, but itâs one of those expressions he canât read.
âWell,â you blurt out after a beat of silence. Looking around, you go over to where you were sitting earlier then duck. âI think I left it hereâŠâ you trail off. Jungkookâs just about to stand up to help as well when you suddenly pull up a brown leather, grinning at both of them. âYay.â
Jungkook chuckles. âThat wouldâve been the third wallet youâll lose this year.â
You mirror his laughter, and Doyeon joins in.
Thereâs another pause and then hesitantly, you ask, âDid I⊠uh⊠disturb something? OrâŠâ
âWhat?â Doyeon asks with furrowed brows. âNo,â
âAh, okay,â you smile at her and then insert your wallet in your shorts. âAnyway, Iâm heading back to Mingyu. The villa he rented is just at the back of ours, so⊠feel free to visit anytime or whatever.â
âSure.â Jungkook says. He didnât mean it to sound clipped and short but he must have unintentionally let the tone slip, as you and Doyeon immediately give him a look. He clears his throat. âI mean, of course. Tomorrow?â
You nod.
You look at him. And then, you point between him and Nayeon. âAre you two staying up here late?â
âNah, Iâm heading to bed actually.â Doyeon says, picking up her phone from the sun lounger.
âYeah, me too.â Jungkook puts the beer to the coffee table and stands up.
You nod. âOkay, then. Well, good night to you two.â
âAlright, good night. Iâll head out first.â Doyeon says before disappearing into the sliding door that leads straight to the villaâs living room.
You soon turn your heels back to head out as well, but Jungkook calls after you. Turning around, you hum, acknowledging him. âHm?â
âGood night, stinky.â
You deadpan. âNight, fucker.â
Jungkook laughs, watching your retreating back as you leave.
[ DAY 4 | September 3rd , 3:05 am ]
Jungkook likes to work out when he has a lot in his mind. But sometimes, he opts for jogging or walking around to clear his head.
With the turn of events since Mingyuâs arrival and Doyeon informing him about your plans on furthering your relationship with Mingyu, he finds himself along by the shore at three am with high hopes to clear his mind. It doesnât give the solution, but it temporarily does the job.
Inserting his hands in the pockets of his hoodie, he looks ahead at the view of the ocean, trying so hard to shut his head down with overbearing thoughts of you. Itâs no use, though, itâs always filled with thoughts of you and you alone.
Jungkook thinks about the time in med school when he thought he was completely over you. It had been after you made it official with Eunwoo two months into seeing him. He thought it would be a âbigger personâ thing to do, moving on, that is, after you announced that you got a boyfriend â but then later on, when he slept with other women or had his casual dates, you suddenly popped up in his head randomly, and his heart suddenly ached when Eunwoo would drop by the university to fetch you. He felt ugly bitterness when you smiled too much whenever Eunwoo was brought up in the conversation. He found himself wishing it was him instead â the guy you thought of buying shirts for, the guy you randomly thought of when you saw something at the mall or the park, or the guy you called when you needed anything.
It was that spring break in second year when he realized that he loved you, after trying hard to brush his feelings off for you as a mere infatuation because you were gorgeous and smart.
He finds himself thinking about the time when he almost let out his heart when you had a fall-out with Eunwoo during your third year. Thinks about how pathetic he was for thinking that he finally had the chance. It had been when you called him at midnight, crying onto the phone as you asked him if he wasnât busy. Jungkook had been studying for a Clinical Skill Assessment at that time, but heâd have been a fool to make you feel lonely when you already seemed like you were not fine. So, he had set aside his studying that night and went right over to your place. You told him about how Eunwoo was going cold, how Eunwoo was getting too close to the senior architect at his firm which youâd been having huge arguments about during those days â Jungkook remembered feeling broken at the sight of you crying, could feel himself building up hatred for the guy who was fucking up his chance with the woman he did not deserve. He thought about how he would never do that to you, thought about how he could be better for you â the envy bubbling inside his heart too big to ignore.
Jungkook remembered thinking how he would never fuck up any chances with you, and how Eunwoo was a fucking idiot for even making you feel that way.
That night, he almost kissed you. And the day after that, you avoided him like the plague.
Doyeon told him he was just as much of a big fucking idiot as Eunwoo for doing that. And Jungkook remembered regretting that night, and swearing off to never, ever make a move on you ever again because your avoidance of him made him feel like the biggest fucking piece of shit to ever exist on Earth.
He remembers you didnât talk to him for about a month. And he remembers fearing that that was finally it. Â
Of course, you made up â youâre still in his life. You let him still be in your life even though he betrayed your trust. The trust that lies on the fact that he was your best friend. Someone who was not supposed to take advantage of your vulnerability, someone who did not suddenly try to kiss you when you were at your worst.
It was a memory you two werenât fond of. Heck, youâve never ever brought it up not even once since it happened. When you finally talked to him again after that, you did not let him apologize for what he did â just shut him down by saying that you two should just forget about it and never mention it again. You made it clear that you did not want to talk about it â not at all, not in a million years.
Again, Jungkook has had a million attempts to move on. Especially when you got back together with Eunwoo. He did temporarily, when Sora came into the picture. He genuinely did like her, even more than his first girlfriend in college, and he thought he could eventually love her the same way he does you, but Eunwoo suddenly proposed⊠and his defense came crumbling down. The fear of losing you once again was too overwhelming that he ruined the relationship with Sora because admittedly, he had always been pathetic like that.
Even now that youâre with Mingyu, heâs still pathetic. He still thinks that one day, you can finally look at him. Like, really look at him and feel anything but friendly towards him. Itâs extremely pathetic that he keeps on telling himself that your friendship will be enough, but then deep down, itâs not.
Jungkook shuts his eyes close when he feels the cool breeze of the wind hitting his skin under the hoodie. He lets himself stand there for a while, just trying to bask in the surroundings, ignoring the heavy feeling that sits in his heart.
But then he smells a sudden waft of smoke, and he knits his brows as he opens his eyes back again, turning to the direction of the smell.
When he turns back, he sees a familiar figure of a man.
âMingyu?â
Mingyu glances back at him with the same surprised look on his face, but it disappears just as quickly. Pinching the cigarette between his fingers, he blows smoke in the air and inserts one hand in his shorts.
âJeon.â
âStill Jeon to you, huh?â Jungkook sneers, walking over to where Mingyu is. âWhy are you here?â
Mingyu arches a brow. âI could ask you the same thing.â
âWoke up a few minutes ago and couldnât get back to sleep.â
Taking a hit of his cigarette again, Mingyu shakes his head. âThatâs tough.â
âSame with you?â Jungkook asks.
âNah. Had a discussion with my girlfriend. Just wanted to clear my head.â
Jungkook nods, not saying anything to that. Itâs weird that youâve been fighting a lot lately. He wonders if youâre okay.
Pulling out a pack of Marlboro and a lighter, Mingyu extends them to Jungkook.
He looks down at it and thinks about how this exact thing happened in college. Mingyu always had the pack of cigarettes and the link to the best weed man in college. He used to think they would be fond memories.
But Jungkook shakes his head, looking ahead.
âI quit years ago.â He says. And it is true. He wasnât much of a smoker and only did it occasionally when he was extremely stressed, but it took him awhile to stop the habit completely, only dropping the cigarettes during second year of med school. Jungkook would say it was due to his own concern about his health â but there was an incident in the same year where you caught him smoking at the uniâs park after a particularly taxing exam, and how you did not hesitate to tell him that you hated â absolutely abhorred â smokers. You said you didnât care if he smoked, but as a med student he shouldâve known better.
He never touched that shit again.
âChanging your ways now?â Mingyu says with a teasing â more like mocking â tone, inserting the pack and lighter back in his pants.
Jungkook shrugs at that, which earns him a scoff from Mingyu.
âDo you smoke around her?â Jungkook suddenly asks.
âWho?â
â__.â
A beat of silence. And then Mingyu laughs.
âNo. She doesnât know I smoke. She doesnât have to.â
Good. Jungkook thinks. Good that he doesnât smoke around her. But what did he mean by saying she doesnât need to know?
âShe doesnât like smokers, you know.â Jungkook tells him.
From his periphery, Jungkook sees Mingyu glancing at him. It takes a while for him to say something.
âYouâd know that, huh?â
The dip in his tone makes Jungkook meet his gaze. Suddenly, the smirk on Mingyuâs face is gone, and thereâs something behind his eyes that he canât quite put a finger on.
Jungkook tries to ignore that. âIâve known her for a long time. The others can also tell you that.â He says, referring to the rest of your friends on the trip.
âYou think I donât know?â
With furrowed brows and growing confusion, Jungkook stares at Mingyu.
âWhat?â
âThat you like my girlfriend.â Mingyu spits the words out like venom in his mouth, but itâs in a way that tells him itâs been sitting with him for far too long. Jungkookâs surprised at the declaration, feels himself being taken aback by the blunt way he said it as if heâs so sure.
But Jungkook doubles down, to Mingyuâs surprise.
âSo?â
That obviously wasnât the answer the other man wanted to hear. So, what? He can dish it, but he canât take it?
âYouâre goddamn pathetic, then.â Mingyu says after awhile, taking a hit on his cigarette again.
It itches the bubbling anger Jungkook has had for him for the past ten years.
âI like __, and Iâm not gonna deny that to you,â Jungkook faces him. âBut you donât have to worry about that, because unlike you, I have enough self-respect to not sleep with my friendâs girlfriend.â
Itâs another response that Mingyu does not expect. Jungkook also did not mean to let that out. But his tongue glided with the words and he couldnât help it. Suddenly, memories of junior year in undergrad comes back flashing to him; Jiyeon and Mingyu, fucking in his goddamn bed, his girlfriend cheating on him with his best friend.
Jungkookâs already moved on from that. Jiyeon was not a loss, even though she was his first girlfriend â heck, first love even, but she cheated on him. And not just with anybody but his best friend at the time. The worst thing was that Mingyu was completely in on it, and Jungkook doesnât think he ever felt remorse about what happened back then. Mingyu gave him a half-assed apology the day he walked in on them, even had the gall to âexplainâ Jiyeonâs side, that apparently, she just wasnât âfeeling itâ with Jungkook anymore, and that Mingyu and her had been hitting it off. Jungkook realized it was why Mingyu suddenly came over way too often over at his apartment.
Itâs exactly why he never bothered to meet with Mingyu after graduation. Why he was not enthusiastic meeting him at the engagement party.
But that happened so many years ago that he thought Mingyuâs changed. He didnât want to burst your bubble and tell you what happened between them back then because heâd be the one to ruin the happiness youâve wished for all these years.
âI see youâre still hung up on that.â Mingyu says after a while. He throws the cigarette away and steps on it with his heel.
Jungkookâs jaw ticks in what he feels is growing rage. âIâve moved on. Iâm just letting you know that even though I like __, Iâm never doing what you did back then.â
âYouâre such good guy, then?â
âIf not cheating makes me a good guy, then maybe I am.â Jungkook shrugs.
âJiyeon was a bitch. She was never gonna be good for you.â Mingyu suddenly says.
It makes Jungkook seethe. âAnd so you fucked her?â
âShe liked me better than you. Women always liked me more, thatâs why I was going through them while your goody-two shoes virgin prude ass was daydreaming about dating to marry. You remember that, right?â Mingyu looks at him with a mocking stare. âAnd Jiyeon was smoking hot. She offered, I just delivered. Said you couldnât make her cum properly. We could have shared her, you know?â
âFuck you.â Jungkook spits out. He feels enraged and pissed and disgusted all at the same time.
âAre you getting mad?â Mingyu levels him with an infuriating smirk. âYou always got a stick up in your ass, Jeon. Kyungmi told me youâre just a regular playboy these days, said it was the effect of your first girlfriend cheating on you. Right now, though, is that just a front to hide your feelings from my girlfriend? A pathetic boy best friend just wanting to be noticed by his hot girl best friend? You play that role so well. Telling me sheâs lactose intolerant, she doesnât like smokers⊠you want to fuck her so bad itâs laughable because you know you canât.â
âDonât⊠fucking talk about her like that.â Jungkook growls, and he feels blood rushing through his veins.
Mingyu shakes his head. âYou know what I thought when I first met her? I was completely interested right away, but when you showed upâŠâ He chuckles in the way that makes Jungkookâs skin prickle. âIt just made me want her more.â
âYouâre fucked in the head.â
âThis fucked in the head guy got the girl you want wanting to commit to him. I donât know if she told you, but weâre moving in together.â
Jungkook pokes his tongue to his cheek. âYou think I wonât tell her about this?â
âYou think sheâs gonna believe you?â Mingyu fires back. Jungkook closes his mouth, doesnât really know if heâs confident enough to say yes. That earns him an arrogant smirk from Mingyu. âThatâs right, she wonât. I have no doubt sheâs gonna choose me over you. Jiyeon has had before. And if youâre gonna fight the same battle again this time, youâll lose.â
Jungkook regulates his breathing hearing his words. Heâs starting to not see clearly, his fist clenching on his side and he knows better than to resort to violence, but Mingyuâs testing his patience.
Heâs completely wrong for thinking that he isnât the same asshole he was back in college. Heâs completely wrong for not telling you about him sooner. Heâs completely wrong about everything.
Glancing at his hand, Mingyu looks him in the eyes, leaning forward. âYou wanna hit me just like how you did back then? You almost fucking killed me when you gave me that head injury that kicked me out of the fucking team.â
The head injury. That fucking head injury. Jungkook was so mad when he found out that he just saw pure red. It wasnât his best moment â he knows. He lost control and just⊠went for it. He still regrets doing it â not punching Mingyu â but for losing it when he couldâve shown him that heâd always be the bigger person between them both.
Heâs quiet and Mingyu takes that as a win. Scoffing, Mingyu says, âI couldâve reported you to the admin and you couldâve been expelled, and if that happened, you couldnât have gone to med. You are where you are right now because of me, so donât fucking show that animosity towards me because you fucking owe me one.â
Jungkook canât help but laugh. But he does so humorlessly. âYou really think that?â He stares at the other guy. âYouâre just as delusional as you were back then, Gyu. You think everybody liked you â but that was just because you were a touch-deprived loser who would fuck anything that breathed near him, and I wasnât. I only entertained women I liked. You thought you were smarter, but I was always the one who got the better and higher grades, even though you studied way harder. Is that why you went with law? So you wonât have to compete with me in the med field? I also know you were pissed as fuck when the captain title was passed on to me instead of you,â Jungkook leans closer as well. âYouâve always thought of yourself so highly, but deep down, you were just an insecure little boy trying to compete with another guy that didnât even see you as competition because you were that irrelevant.â
Mingyu, in his own fir of rage, grabs Jungkookâs collar, but Jungkook stays in his place, face stoic as Mingyu snarls, âYou keep running your mouth while you cry yourself to sleep because those donât mean anything when Iâm the one fucking the love of your life,â Jungkook visibly recoils to that, and when Mingyu notices, he smirks, adding, âYeah, yeah, you wanna know how __ is in bed? Because youâll never see her sopping wet when you give her cock. That angelic face of hers⊠youâll never know sheâs a slut the way that filthy mouth asks me to fuck her harder because I am that gooââ
He wasnât able to finish his sentence when Jungkookâs heavy fist suddenly lands on his cheek.
That effectively gets Mingyu to let go of Jungkookâs collar as he loses his balance and steps backwards limply, thumbing the side of his mouth only to see blood.
Whisking away his fist, Jungkook looks at Mingyu with fire in his eyes and venom in his voice when he says, âDonât you ever fucking dare talk about her like that, you fucking piece of shit.â
The moon hangs low in the sky, casting a silvery white glow over the beach, but the comforting sound of waves and the calm of the surrounding is a contrast to the rising tension between Jungkook and Mingyu.
When Mingyu doesnât say anything, Jungkook turns on his heel, ready to leave, but suddenly, he feels the back of his shirt getting pulled and being met with a fist right on his cheek, close to his nose. He barely dodges the hit, taken aback by the unexpected attack.
âFuck you.â Mingyu grits, eyes blazing.
With that, the fight intensifies, with Jungkook throwing a quick jab back. Mingyu retaliates with as much fury, the two of them grappling, their bodies colliding with violent force. Soon, the sound of their grunts and the occasional crash of a punch against flesh is drowned out by the crashing waves.
And then a familiar voice calls their names.
âJungkook! Mingyu!â
âOh my god!â
Jungkookâs suddenly being taken away by somebody by his arms, and he realizes itâs Taehyung when he speaks up again once he and Mingyu are off each other.
âWhat the fuck are you two doing?â Taehyung asks incredulously, rightfully shocked at what heâs seen. Jungkook forces his way out of Taehyungâs hold in frustration, wiping the side of his mouth. Mingyuâs on the other side a few inches away being hesitantly held down by Nayeon, who looks at all of them with deep worry in her eyes. Turning to her, Taehyung says, âCall Doyeon and __. Theyïżœïżœïżœre sleeping in the same room together at the villa.â
âYou donât need to do that,â Jungkook says, glaring at Taehyung.
He looks at him angrily. âYouâre fistfighting with somebody at fuck oâclock in the morning. Weâre going to get run off by the police, be thankful we saw you.â
âI-Iâll call Doyeon and __.â Nayeon stutters, reluctantly pulling away from Mingyu and going to the direction of the villas.
When she leaves, Taehyung looks between the two beaten up men, not believing their busted faces. Rubbing his own with his hands in frustration, he looks back at them again, saying, âWhat the fuck happened to you guys? Why were you fighting?â
âItâs none of your business.â Mingyu says.
Taehyung glances at him with irritation. âNone of my business? Fuck off, Kim Mingyu. You joined in on this trip. Everything that happens here is quite literally each otherâs business.â
âTae.â
âI canât believe you guys,â Taehyung shakes his head, ignoring Jungkook. âFighting like goddamn immature teenagers⊠are you not embarrassed?â
Looking away, Jungkook decides to sit on the sand and let Taehyungâs words go from one ear to another. His energy is waning and the rage he had a while ago is just simmering down to⊠nothing. He feels absolutely empty.
âJungkook?â He doesnât realize the steps that were coming towards them were you and Doyeon. Itâs obvious that youâve both been sleeping, still in your pajamas as you rush towards their direction. He looks at you when you call his name, but then suddenly, you turn to Mingyu. âMingâ what happened?â
Jungkook feels his heart break when you come towards Mingyuâs direction first. He knows why you did. Heâs your boyfriend, of course you are going to tend to him first.
Suddenly, he remembers what Mingyu said. About you choosing him over Jungkook.
Jungkook didnât doubt that, but it doesnât mean it doesnât hurt a little to see it fully realized.
âJungkookâ Jesus Christ,â Doyeon comes over to him and quickly checks his head. With knitted brows, she casts him a look.
âIâm fine.â
Sheâs about to say something, but then she closes her mouth and then glances at you.
Sighing, she turns to everyone and announces, âLook, letâs just get them back to the villa. Treat their wounds before they get infected.â
âRight.â Taehyung says and then comes over to Jungkook to help Doyeon guide him in walking. He relents first because he doesnât need their assistance, but Taehyung looks at him and he knows heâs pissed. So, he lets them.
As he tries to subtly look over to where you were, you have your arm around Mingyuâs waist while Nayeon helps guide him as well.
It takes a tedious few minutes to get back to the villa where Doyeon and Taehyung decide to take care of him in his room while Nayeon and you tend to Mingyu back in your room.
Doyeon nor Taehyung doesnât say anything the whole time. Just let the silence fall in the room as they clean his wounds and put bandages around the cuts on his face and treat his busted lip.
He knows theyâll talk to him in the next few hours. Itâs inevitable. But at least theyâre sparing him for tonight â or today, since itâs almost four am.
Jungkook regrets not seeing the sunrise.
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this chapter is not over yet! tumblr has a 1k paragraph/block limit in a single post and so i can't put the whole thing in this. please look thru the reblogs to read the last scene and the continuation of this chapter!
#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook smut#bts smut#jungkook x reader#mingyu x reader#bts imagines#bts scenarios
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