#Never thought I’d be making another meme like this for another film festival almost one year apart but here we are.🤷‍♀️

[stargazerlillian]

[revengeisourlullaby]

Thousand Eyes

Warnings: Pro Hero Au, 18+, smut, unprotected sex, dom/sub-themes, overstimulation, begging, choking, oral (receiving), jealousy, hair pulling, claiming, slight breeding kink, fluffy ending

Shoto Todoroki x Female! Reader

Word Count: 7.4K

a/n: Happy Holidays everyone! I hope whoever comes across this is having a good end of the year and finding the positives in all the craziness. I have a few more fics in the works and will start pumping them out since I’m on break. Maybe I’ll start incorporating hcs, fluff only stuff, drabbles, etc and not just the long fics. Much love <3

You were sitting on the couch, scrolling through your phone waiting for Todoroki to arrive home from work. You had just finished fixing up dinner and he typically came home around the same time so the two of you could eat together. While switching from Tiktok to Twitter, you heard the front door click signaling to you that Todoroki had come home. Bringing yourself up from the couch you walked over to the door to greet him with a hug. You barely left any room for him to remove himself from his shoes before you wrapped your arms around his neck and nuzzled into him. Todoroki looked down at you, smiling. 

“Hi, baby.”

Dropping his work bag off to the side he returned your hug, squeezing you a little tighter than normal. Pulling away from him, you moved back a bit to finally let him all the way through the door. 

“How was work today?”

Grabbing his duffel bag up from off the floor and bringing it into the bedroom you heard him respond from the other room. 

“Not too bad. Actually, it was pretty calm today, mostly patrol over anything.”

“Well, that’s nice to finally have a break of sorts.”

Walking back into the main room, you saw him towards the bathroom. 

“Yeah, it was a nice change of things. Actually, something else came up. I want to talk to you about it but I’m gonna shower first if that’s alright?”

Nodding lightly in response, you waved him off. Walking back into the kitchen you turn the burner back on the stove to give the dinner that you made some extra heat.

“We can talk about it over dinner.”

Hearing him hum an okay and disappear into the bathroom, you hopped back on your phone and scrolled through Twitter again. Mindlessly scrolling, you saw a post reminding you about your childhood. It was a meme regarding the Grinch and you went deep in thought about your life in the earlier years. Thinking about how much you loved the Christmas season, and how that film somehow brought your family together no matter the occasion. The memories sticking with you dearly. You were so lost in thought that you hadn’t seen your phone shut off or Todoroki slipping out from the bathroom. He was standing in front of you and you still hadn’t noticed him standing there. 

He walked up to you, placing his arm on your arm and his other hand finding his way under your chin lifting it slightly so you could look at him. 

“Hey, my little ember. You there?”

He softly chuckled which brought you back to reality. Staring up into his eyes, you realized once again how beautiful he was. His hair was halfway dried, a few beads of water snaking their way down his strands. His brows were slightly furrowed in an attempt to silently understand what was going on in your head. Even though you guys had been together for a few years now, seeing him in front of you like this after you had zoned out and made the blood rush to your face. Making you heat up instantly.

“Y-yeah I’m fine. I was just thinking about old memories and got lost in them. You uh, you ready to eat?”

“Yeah sure.”

Grabbing two dishes from the cabinets you plated the food for both you and Todoroki. Bringing them to the table you turned back around to grab two glasses you turned around and asked him what he wanted to drink. Bringing the two cups to the table you finally sat down and the two of you began to eat. Swallowing you looked up at Todoroki.

“So what was it you wanted to talk about?”

“Oh! Yeah, I completely forgot.”

Taking another bite of food Todoroki began to speak through his mouth full of food. 

“So when I was leaving work today one of my interns informed me of this gala being thrown for all the heroes. I called Midoriya to see if he knew anything about it and it seems that it’s more festive than formal. Like a Christmas get-together. So, this is a long-winded answer of me asking if you’d want to join me?”

Your mind was racing about what you were gonna wear to this gala because the last thing you wanted was for you to feel underdressed. 

“Y/N?”

“Yeah! No, I'd love to go. I was just thinking about what I was gonna wear.” 

Chuckling softly, you rubbed the back of your neck, kinda embarrassed at yourself for being so vacant of reply for your boyfriend. 

“You’re always thinking about how you look...and I don’t understand why because you know you’re gonna be the hottest one in the room.”

“Sho! You’re gonna make my head big.”

“What?! It’s true. You’re too hard on yourself”

Shoveling another bite of food in your mouth you brushed him off

“Yeah, yeah I know but still I wanna look good. I can’t be next to you and then not put out. Can you imagine how that’d look?” 

Looking at him incredulously you were waiting for him to respond and when he did you wanted to slam your face in your hands.

“It’d probably look fine because you look fine regardless.”

“Shotoough-”

Exasperating at his response it caused him to let out a small laugh. Following suit with the small laughing fit, you shook your head and regained yourself. 

“So you said it’s kinda festive like we’re supposed to dress up?”

“I suppose. I’m pretty sure either way is fine.” he responded flatly standing up to go help himself to a second serving of food. 

“When is it by the way?” 

“Tomorrow.” he said, turning around to come to sit back at the table.

“Tomorrow?!” choking on your food a bit from the shock of this event being tomorrow. 

“Yeah..”

“Well, now I really have to worry about what I’m going to wear. Shit.”

Todoroki stayed silent noticing that you were deep in thought trying so fervently to figure out what you were going to wear to this gala. You didn’t want to disappoint but at the same time, you didn’t want to make it seem like a big deal for Todoroki’s sake. 

Suddenly, your eyes widened and you realized that you had the perfect thing to wear. 

“Todoroki! I got it!”

“Huh? Got what?”

“What I’ll wear for tomorrow!” 

Standing up from the table you walked into the bedroom speaking to him while walking away.

“Do you remember when I was making that Santa outfit but never wore it out because I was afraid it was too obnoxious? The one I based off that rich lady in the Grinch.”

Sliding the hangers to the side you were sifting through all your clothes trying to find this dress that you made a couple of years ago. Sliding over to the side of your clothes that you had your winter wear organized in you saw bright red fanned out on the floor of the closet. Bending down to pick up the fabric from the floor, your backside brushed up against something. Standing up with the dress in your hands you turned around to see Todoroki standing behind you. Holding the dress out to your side, Todoroki wrapped his arms around your waist. Your bright smile plastered across your face 

“Look! I found it. I’m gonna have to go get a petticoat tomorrow so it lays right but I think it’ll work well! And I can find you something too while I’m out.”

“I don’t think that’ll be necessary, baby. Wouldn’t wanna steal the show from my girl now would I?”

Dropping your arm that was holding the dress you wrapped your other around Todoroki’s neck. Threading your fingers at the base of his hair, massaging lightly into his scalp. 

“No, I guess not.” 

Smiling up at him, Todoroki lowered his head to meet your lips. Engulfing your lips in a tender kiss that warmed up your entire body. Every time he kissed you it felt like it was the first and you never wanted them to end. His lips were always somehow so soft and inviting. Pulling away and looking back up at him an idea popped in your head.

“Maybe we can just add a lil something to your tux then.”

With a small smile now on his face, he nodded his head in agreement. With a yawn beginning to dawn on him, your body followed suit against your will. A sudden wave of tiredness falling over you both. Stepping away from you, Todoroki began heading toward the bathroom. 

“Why don’t we get ready for bed? I have to get up a little early to finish up the paperwork from today’s shift.”

Nodding slightly you followed him into the bathroom beginning your nightly routine. You finished before Todoroki and walked back into the bedroom. You picked your costume up from the pool it was in on the floor and hung it back up in the closet. The cheeky smile that spread across your face was something that didn’t slide past Todoroki when he came back into the bedroom. 

“What’s got you smiling like that?” a breathy chuckled punctuated his question.

“Nothing really. Just thinking about how we’re gonna look tomorrow. I’m excited.”

Climbing into bed, you snuggled up into Todoroki as well as the sheets. 

“Well don’t stay too excited, you gotta get your rest.”

Placing a kiss atop your head you told each other good night and Todoroki shut off the lights. 

Waking up the next morning, you’d had gotten up a little later than you expected. You usually were able to catch him before he left. Throwing the sheets off yourself you stretched and tried to get yourself out of bed. Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes you opened up your phone and when you saw the time the leftover sleep left your body and you started getting ready in a hurry. It was almost noon and you still had to go out and grab a boutonnière for Todoroki and a petticoat for your dress. You got ready in record time and left your home to get said desired items. You wanted to be back in time to do your makeup and get properly dressed up and not be rushed for the event. 

By the time you got back home, it was around 2:30pm. Who knew finding a mistletoe boutonnière would’ve been such a feat. Finally settling into the couch you let out a sigh a relief and your stomach let you know for the third time within the hour you should eat something. With a groan, you waddled into the kitchen and fixed yourself something quick to eat. Todoroki would be home around five so you had enough time to screw around a bit. After you finished up you looked at the clock and decided to start to get ready for the evening. 

With your speaker blasting Christmas music you were clad only in black lingerie and adding the final touches to your makeup. Stepping back away from the mirror to get a full look at your face you smirked at yourself and went into the bedroom to get your dress and everything on. Pulling up your red fishnets and petticoat you walked over to the closet to grab the dress. 

Slipping it on you fastened the belt and then bent over to grab your red heeled boots from the bottom of the closet. As you got the zipper up on the boots you heard the front door open, signaling that Todoroki just got in. You glanced over at the clock and noticed it was about 5:30pm.

‘Just in time’ you had thought to yourself. Todoroki called out for you and with a quick 

“In here!”, you let him know that you were in the bedroom. You stood up and straightened yourself out while looking into the mirror embedded on the closet door. 

“Wow.”

Turning your head to look at him you posed and smiled at him. 

“Ya like?” 

“Yes, my little ember. You look amazing.” 

You walked a little closer to him wrapping your arms around his neck. You felt heat travel up into your face as his gaze seemed to pierce through you. 

“I know what that look means, and you need to get ready, or otherwise we’ll be late.” 

Planting a small kiss on his cheek you walked away and heard a small groan come from him which elicited a chuckle from you. While you were waiting for Todoroki to finish getting ready, you were stuck in front of the mirror in the main room deciding whether or not you wanted to add the Santa hat or not. You decided to keep it on hand and just put it on when you arrived at the gala. You didn’t want an indent in your hair to be too noticeable and if worse came to worse you would just have to fluff out your hair in the bathroom. 

You heard the clearing of Todoroki’s throat and you looked behind you. He always looked so good in anything he was in. His black tuxedo fitted nicely against his body and his hair was slicked back, a few pieces falling loosely in the front. 

“Well, look at you.” A cheeky smile following your words. 

“You like?” Todoroki wore a smug smile referencing back to how you greeted him earlier. Catching on you continued the charade. 

“Yes, very much. But, I have something to make it even better.” 

Walking into the kitchen where you dumped your findings from your outing earlier, you grabbed the mistletoe boutonnière. Going back over to Todoroki you began to pin the boutonnière onto the lapel of his tux.

“I told you I was going to find you something to make it a little festive. So now, whenever I come next to you a part of me will be under you. So I’ll just have to kiss you.”

Finishing pinning it onto his lapel, you looked up at him, his heterochromatic eyes seeming to sparkle with a new endearment to bestow upon you. 

“Very funny, now let’s get going.” He pressed a kiss on top of your head and you stretched back to grab your hat and clutch that you left on the counter and walked out the door. 

The drive to the venue was quiet but that was nothing out of the ordinary. What was though was Todoroki’s hand on your thigh occasionally squeezing at the plushness of them. You were smirking to yourself trying your best to keep your composure, but he gave your leg one particularly hard squeeze and you pressed your legs together out of habit. 

“You alright?” 

You could hear the smirk in his voice but you refused to give into him this early, you hadn’t even pulled up yet. Clearing your throat you fixed yourself in your seat

“Yeah, great actually baby.” Moving your hand onto his thigh closest to you you asked him, 

“You excited for it?”

“Yeah, I think it’ll be fun for the both of-” You had grazed your hand across his lap, running over his clothed sex to reach his other thigh and give it a squeeze causing his breath to hitch. 

“Guess I should’ve known that was coming sooner or later.” An airy chuckled left him but you knew that you had him right where you wanted him. Pulling up to the venue, he parked the car. 

Stepping out you grabbed your clutch and hat, staring into the tinted side window to place your hat where you wanted it. While checking yourself in your makeshift mirror, Todoroki came up behind you wrapping his arms around your waist. Nestling his chin into your neck

“You look so beautiful, baby.” 

“I know, now let’s go in so everyone can see.” You knew where he was attempting to go with his compliments but at least wanted to experience a little bit of the gala before your makeup would be indubitably ruined.  The both of you walked up to the hall this event was being held in and you could hear Christmas music blasting. The doors of the hall were open so you knew exactly where to go. 

Stepping in the hall looked like a winter wonderland. There was soft blue lighting throughout, snowflake and icicle decorations hanging from the ceiling. Centerpieces on the tables were filled with snowbrushed branches and accents of green. And of course in looking at the scenery in front of you, you failed to noticed the mistletoe hanging above you and Todoroki’s heads until Midoriya came up to greet you guys. 

“Hey! Todoroki, Y/N, how are you guys.”

“We’re doing great, it’s really good to see you Izuku!” You moved to go and hug him but he backed away slightly. 

“I can’t step under there with you Y/N, Todoroki is right there.” A nervous laugh left him but the overtone of joy covered it up. 

“What do you mean?” Looking up you noticed the mistletoe and then glanced at Todoroki

“Oh, that’s what he means.” Todoroki verbalizing your thought. With a quick kiss to Todoroki you moved back over to Midoriya giving him a hug. 

“You’re still such a goofball, I love it.” As you two were giggling you looked over at Todoroki who signaled to you that he was being motioned over with some work friends. Giving him a nod you hung around Midoriya for the moment.

“You wanna grab a drink? They have this killer spiked eggnog, you can’t even taste the alcohol.”

Raising your eyebrow you lightly elbowed Midoriya

“Sounds like my kinda thing.”

While walking up to the bar, you noticed Bakugou hunched over scouring the floor of the hall. He hadn’t noticed you yet so you picked up your steps and called out to him.

“Hey! Kaachan!” 

An audible groan left his mouth, cutting through the music that was blasting through the speakers. You knew that nickname pinched a nerve in him and seeing his reaction killed you every time. You came up closer to him and enveloped him in tight hug.

“Oh c’mon don’t be like that. You know I can’t resist screwing with you.”

“Yeah yeah, now get off me.”

“Not until you give me a proper hug you dumbass”

Reciprocating the hug with one arm you stepped back and he finally got a full look at your outfit. Lifting his glass to his face he motioned to you

“Nice outfit.”

“Right! I finally had a place to put it to use to.”

Midoriya had chimed into the conversation now, “That’s the dress from the live action Grinch right?”

“Yeah! God I love that movie.”

Sitting up on the stool next to Bakugou, you asked for some of that eggnog Midoriya was raving about. You spun around so you could face both Midoriya and Bakugou while at the same time trying to spot Todoroki in the crowd of people. You spotted him chatting with Momo and a few other people that you assumed he’d done work with. 

You hadn’t noticed that Midoriya had walked over to Todoroki, you were too busy wrapped up in your thoughts at the moment. You sucked your teeth and a small sudden wave of jealousy was flowing over you. While in your head you turned your head to see your drink waiting on the bar counter and you took a big gulp of it. 

“God damn Y/N, did you even taste it.” Bakugou teased you.

“Yeah I tasted it. Midoriya was right saying you couldn’t even taste the alcohol. Shit is like juice.” You laughed trying your best to cover up your jealousy with alcoholic tendencies and low rate jokes. 

Bakugou noticed the quick change in your behavior and tried to follow to where your eyes were boring holes into. Once he saw Todoroki and Momo sitting a little too close for comfort he understood the current state of upset you were in. 

“Stop staring at it, it’s just gonna make you more upset. It’s probably nothing anyway.”

“Staring at what-”

“Todoroki and Momo. You couldn’t hide your emotions to save your life Y/N”

“Guess you’re right about that.”

Sighing you swiveled the chair back around ordering another glass in a piss poor attempt to keep your nerves at ease and not think about the scene in front of you. You trusted Todoroki and never even thought of him having ill intentions with you. 

You just felt a little competition with Momo considering they went to school together, she was stunning and he once had a crush on her that you found out not too long ago. It was all too much for you to process in the moment and Bakugou was attempting to figure out what to do to pull you out of your funk. Putting his glass on the counter he put his his arm on your shoulder.

“Look, you’re too pretty and look too nice to be feeling like this.”

Standing up he held his hand out to you and looked up toward the speakers,

“And by the sound of things, seems like it’s the perfect time to share a dance. So, care to dance with me?”

A small smile spreading across your face, you chugged the rest of your glass of eggnog and took his hand.

“I’m never gonna forget that.”

“Oh shut up.” Lightly laughing you trailed behind Bakugou leading you to the floor. Sia’s Snowman was coming through the speakers and you seemed to forget what it was you were upset about while swaying with Bakugou. He seemed to catch onto this and looked down to you only to be met with your eyes looking up at him with that of a doe. 

“Thank you.”

“Oh don’t start with that I just didn’t want to sit with someone mopey.” 

You nudged him while still swaying to the music

“Oh whatever, I’m still thanking you.” He looked down at you again 

“Try not to think about it too much. He’s still somehow ridiculously oblivious to things and doesn’t think about stuff like that too deeply. He doesn’t mean nothing by it. Wanna go get another drink and go over there?”

“Sure why not.”

Getting your drinks you walked over to the group of people you had become acquainted with through Todoroki. Old school friends of his that you seemed to flawlessly get along with. Walking in front of Bakugou you heard him mumbling about something. 

“What’d ya say?”

“Why are you walking in front of me?”

“Seriously?! That’s why you’re making all that noise.” You knew he screwing with you and you just waved your hand and walked over to the group. When you got there you noticed Todoroki wasn’t there anymore. Momo was the first to greet you out the group.

“Hi Y/N! How are you, it’s been so long.” She was also in a Santa dress but less dramatic than yours. She had a cute little santa hat headband to top it all off.

“I’m doing great! And you look gorgeous as always. This is a little off topic but do you know where Shoto went? I needed to ask him something.”

“I think he went to the bathroom. If you go to the back of the hall and turn left that’s where they are.”

“Okay cool, thank you. I’ll be right back!” You announcned to the rest of the group and they all nodded you off, acknowledging your absence. Walking to the bathrooms you went to turn into the hallway but instead turned into boyfriend. 

“Oh there you are, I just coming to look for you.”

His demeanor seemed unreasonably sharp and you couldn’t place whether he was mad at you or something else. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” 

“Nothing why don’t you go hang up on Bakugou again.” 

Your face contorted in surprise and complete shock about how he was addressing the situation. He tried to walk away but you grabbed his wrist.

“Hold on, you’re not gonna jab at me like that then walk away. If it bothered you that much why didn’t you just come up and switch with him. I didn’t come up to you because it seemed like you were enjoying yourself chatting with Momo and everyone and I didn’t want to interrupt. That’s all.” 

“It’s a little hard to pay attention to a conversation when I’m focused on you dancing with another man, let alone it being someone I’m close to.” 

With that he walked away from you and back to the group from before. You watched him in disbelief, in absolute shock about what just happened. You took a deep breath and huffed walking back to group as well, instead when you arrived you didn’t sit on the couch next to Todoroki but rather leaned on the back of the couch standing over everyone. 

Looking up you saw Bakugou coming back with two drinks in his hands. He looked down at the couch and noticed Midoriya slumped out on the couch, unsure if he was sleeping or trying to focus himself on not making a mess everywhere. 

“Got this for him, but I think this is that last thing he needs so you can have it.” You smiled a thank you and continued chatting with everyone. You looked over at Todoroki who’s face was blank but his eyes held a fury that was unmistakable to you. You grabbed your phone out of your clutch to send him a text but he didn’t respond, let alone look at his phone. You sighed and excused yourself to the bathroom this time actually having to go. When you left you ran into Todoroki waiting in the hallway. 

“Hey…”

“Save it, we’ll talk about it later.” 

Mumbling an okay you walked back to the group slightly stumbling, all the eggnogs finally catching up with you. You took a detour to the bar to get a water to try and balance everything out. While sitting up at the bar Bakugou came up beside you. 

“What’s up with him?”

“He’s upset with me for dancing with you. Guess he does think pretty deeply about these things.” You rolled your eyes not having the energy to put more thought into your partners antics, knowing that if you did you’d completely ruin the rest of your mood. You looked up towards the group and saw Todoroki giving what looked like his goodbyes to everyone. You swiveled back to face Bakugou 

“This blows, but at least I looked cute while it happened.” Shaking your head you took another sip of your water. 

“That you did.”

You looked at him through your lashes, unamused knowing that he was part of the reason you were in the predicament that you were in. Chuckling to yourself you spoke one more time

“This will make for a funny memory in retrospect but right now I’m so over it.” 

The two of you were lightly laughing with each other when Todoroki made his way up to you too. 

“I’ll be taking her now.”

Whipping your head to him you couldn’t believe the way he was speaking.

“I’m sorry who the fuck is her?” The alcohol making you a little more loose lipped than normal as well as bringing your bubbling frustrations of the evening to the forefront. Bakugou snorted at the sight in front of him and got up from the bar

“See ya around Y/N. Call me.”

“See ya man.” 

Todoroki was glaring at the two of you and the ending interaction before he turned on his heel with your hand in his. Completely numb to the situation and with the help from alcohol you were almost a blank slate, not really thinking about anything that was going on. 

“Can you stop walking so fast, please, baby?” You were met with silence until you got to his car. Mumbling to yourself you didn’t think he’d hear you but to your surprise he did.

“If you’re gonna say something, say it so I can hear it.”

“Oh will you quit the act already. I was dancing with him I didn’t fuck him Shoto.”

“Sure looked like you wanted to with the way you were looking at him-

“-And I could say the same about you and Momo but you ain’t see me throw a fuckin hissy fit about it Sho! All up on her n shit, give me a break. Let’s just go home.”

You grabbed the door handle and let yourself in the passengers side sitting in silence when Todoroki got in and started the car. The tension in the car couldn’t be sliced with the sharpest blade, it was so thick it was almost suffocating. You took your hat off and fluffed your hair out in an attempt to hide that you were trying to get a look at him. His hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly that his knuckles were turning white and his veins were jutting out from his hand. 

You couldn’t deny that that sight alone was enough to send your mind spiraling elsewhere, but you couldn’t shake the guilty feeling that was beginning to well up in you. Pulling up into the driveway the two of you continued the silent treatment to each other. Walking inside the house you slipped off your heels, your feet relieved to be let out of their cages. You walked over to the kitchen to grab a glass of water but didn’t get the chance to make it to the fridge because Todoroki had come up behind you caging you to the countertop. 

“Sho, I don’t have the energy for this right now”

Moving his hand to your waist he spun you around to face him

“So you have the energy to pay attention to Bakugou but can’t give me the time of day.”

“Oh fuck you.”

Moving yourself out from under his arms you moved to go to the fridge but once again Todoroki interrupted you plans. This time it was with his hands around your waist pulling you into him. 

“I think you might want to rethink your choice of words baby. It’s not wise to upset me further.”

“What are you gonna do-punish me? Please.” Scoffing you tried to move away from him but his grip on you was tighter than you expected. All of this was too much and you were trying your hardest to keep your arousal at bay. You hated fighting with him but something about the way he was going about this was making your brain spark. 

“Is that what you want? Cause I think it can be arranged.”

“Actually what I want is for you to be an adult about this and to stop acting lik-”

“Shut up.”

“What?!”

Catching you off guard he pressed his lips against yours the sexual tension finally dispersing between you too. The frustration and anger of the situation being displayed through the fiery kiss between you two. Todoroki picked you up and placed you on the counter top, his hand trailing up your back and landing at the base of your neck, lacing his fingers into the bottom of your hair. 

Your hands planted on his chest pulling at the fabric of his jacket trying to bring him as close as possible to you. He pulled away from your lips and moved down to your neck finding you sweet spot immediately. He sucked on it until it seemed like it would hurt if he did for a second longer. He moved down to the plunged neckline of your dress and attacked the top of your breast that was exposed. With an airy moan escaping you you found yourself giving up on fighting him.

“Sho~ baby please.”

“I thought I told you to be quiet.” 

You were almost caught off guard by his response but instead was caught off by him picking you up off the counter and carrying you into the bedroom. When he plopped you on the bed, his boutonnière fell on top of you landing in your lap. 

“Now would you look at that. Guess I have to kiss what under it huh? Scoot back for me baby”

Moving back, Todoroki ran his hands up and down your thighs. His lips began kissing up your thighs while he was squeezing the sides of them. When he came close to your heat he breathed on it, pressing his nose into your clit but instead of finishing the job he moved to your other thigh teasing you. 

“Shoto please, I need you. You can’t keep teasing me like this.”

Lifting his head up from in between your legs he looked up at you.

“For someone who is the reason why we’re here in the first place, what makes you think you can order me around like that.” Cocking his eyebrow he awaited your answer, but your answer never came because he was teasing your clit. Rubbing his finger lightly up and down between your folds you couldn’t focus on your words. 

“That what I thought. Now shut the fuck up and let me do my work.”

With that he ripped at your red fishnets creating a hole right where your panties resided. You went to scold him for ripping your tights but before you could say anything he had used his quirk to singe off your panties leaving you bare in his wake. 

“Now, I know you can’t stay quiet for long, but I want you to try your hardest to keep quiet for me baby. Okay?”

You nodded vigorously looking down at him. He took that as his cue and licked a fat slow strip between your lips. Your breath hitched but you kept your silence. When he began circling your clit that when his request became a little more difficult to complete. Picking up his pace he began lapping at your clit making you lose your composure. A moan slipped past your lips. You began bucking your hips into him signaling that you were close to you release, something you should’ve held out on because Todoroki stopped his movements. Bringing his head up to face you he smirked

“See, you can keep quiet. All night you’ve been running your mouth but apparently you only listen when my mouth is on you. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes, but please Sho, please I wanna cum so bad.”

“Don’t worry my little ember, I’ll let you get to your release. You just have to listen to what I say. This time make as much noise as you want. I want to know how good I’m making you feel”

With the tip of his tongue he licked a quick strip across your clit, making you squirm on your back 

“Fuck!”

Chuckling to himself he began lapping at your clit again. Creating figure eights you lost all your senses. You completely gave into him and couldn’t hold back. Moaning, you were writhing in tempo with his tongue lost in the pleasure he was giving you. Your drenched hole began to flutter and heat started to flow to the lower end of your stomach. 

Overwhelmed with your orgasm your body convulsed against Todoroki, but he didn’t stop. He kept thrashing his tongue against your overstimmed cunt. Panting and moaning you grabbed a fistful of his hair trying to lift him away from you but he wrapped his arms around your hips locking you to the bed and his face.

“Shoto, fuck! It’s too much, I-I can’t take it.”

Instead of responding, Todoroki hummed against your pussy the vibrations sending you into your second orgasm. You screamed out Todoroki’s name unable to handle the stimulation running through your body. Todoroki finally lifted himself from your legs, staring at you like a predator does its prey.

“Didn’t know you could do that baby.” A smirk stretching across his face while he removed himself of his jacket and dress shirt.

“Do what-” You cut yourself off suddenly feeling a cold wet spot on the inside of your thigh. The realization of you squirting on his face threw you into a moment of embarrassment where you almost forgot he was in the room. 

“Baby, stay with me. Cause I’m not done with you yet. You have a lot to make up for for the stunts you pulled back at the gala. Don’t you think?”

Kissing you, you tasted the tang of yourself fresh on his tongue. You slid your tongue across his lip, asking for permission and he obliged. Your tongues danced a waltz that only you two knew the steps to. The fire from the both of you radiated off each other and fueled the jealousy ridden passion from tonight. Pulling away from you, he trailed his deft fingers down the valley of your exposed breasts and stopped at the belt of your dress.

“I think it’s time for this to go.”

Gently taking your articles of clothing off you sat up from your flattened position of the bed and pulled your arms from the sleeves. You wrapped your arms around Todoroki pulling him back into the bed and flipped yourself onto of him. You heard his shoes hit the ground and you began working on his neck. Sucking a small hickey onto the skin right underneath his collar bone. Grinding yourself into him you felt his bulge begging to be set from the confinements of his pants. 

Sliding yourself off of him you fumbled with the button of his pants and pulled them off along with his underwear. Taking advantage of your current position you were going to try your hardest to stay in control of it. Coming back up to kiss Todoroki you felt in between your legs for his length and positioned it at your entrance. 

His head was enough to make you go feral, making you want nothing but the rest of him. Hearing Todoroki’s breath hitch was just enough encouragement to push you to fully bottom out on him. The both of you groaned in pleasure at the sensation.

“Fuck you feel so good wrapped around me, baby. Feel good on me. Use me and only me. You’re mine and I’m yours remember that.” 

Though you knew what he meant, his last statement almost rubbed you the wrong way and brought back the frustrations from before. He was still bringing it up and you were getting sick of it. Rolling your hips back and forth on him you decided to use him to your full advantage.

Finding your rhythm you bounced up and down on his cock. Focused on your pleasure and also taking out your emotions on him. His moans were so blissful though that you couldn’t help but be intoxicated by him at this moment.

“Y/N, you’re so good, Fuck! Keep doing that ah~”

Feeling a sudden wave of confidence flood through you you decided to see how far you could take this position of control with him. 

“Yeah, you like that? You’re the only one that gets it. Not Bakugou, nobody but you.” With a ballsy move, you wrapped your hand around his neck and choked him. It didn’t last long though. Within a second you were flipped over, Todoroki hovering over you with sheer lust adorning his eyes. His hand wrapped around your neck, fingers pressing into the blood vessels on either side of your neck.

“Don’t say his fuckin name while I’m inside you. You think of me and only me. Understand?” 

Nodding quickly you recognized your reign of power was now over. Todoroki then slid his length almost all the way out before slamming it back into you kissing your cervix with blatant ferocity.

“Fuck! Sho! Fuck fuck fuck” 

Panting you were desperately looking for something to grab hold of. You shoved your hands into the sheets of the bed before slamming your nails into his back. The pace he set was vicious, clearly taking out his frustration on you.

“All night it’s been about him but right now I want all your focus on me. You belong to me Y/N.”

Grabbing your face he squished your cheeks together forcing your lips to pucker. 

“Look at me while I fuck you. Burn this into your memory of who makes you feel this fucking good.”

You looked at him and felt yourself about to reach your peak. Your fluttering alerted Todoroki to your climax and he pulled out.

“Sho, please. Please don’t do this to me again.”

“Hush and get on your hands and knees.”

Flipping yourself over, you pressed your face into the mattress and wiggled your ass in the air, waiting for Todoroki to line himself up with your sopping hole. 

“There you go, give me those hips. Ahh, fuck baby.”

Again his pace was unrelenting. The fat on your ass rippled with each contact of his hips.

“Come on, you know how to fuck me. Show me you deserve it.”

Todoroki tangled his hand into your hair and brought you up so your back lay flush against his chest. 

“I’m gonna dog fuck you, fill you up with so much of me that you don’t even have time to look at someone else without thinking of me. Every time you think of me you’re gonna think about my cum dripping out of you. Now, who do you belong to.”

“You.”

“Who? Sorry I didn’t hear a name”

“You, Shoto fuck! It’s you, it’s only ever gonna be you. Fucking hell.”

“There it is baby. You’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you? That’s why you’ve been mouthing me off. Well, fuckin take it.”

Letting loose of his grip on your hair and submissiveness taking full control of you, you began whining into the sheets. His cock attacking your walls was sending you into a space of mindlessness. 

“Sho- please, please can I cum. I need to cum so bad.”

“Go ahead baby, squeeze all the cum out of me. I’m gonna make you mine in every sense of the word.”

His thrusts began to falter and became deeper and slower. With one final thrust, you came around him, your pussy dancing around his cock milking him of his seed. 

“Fuck! Holy-”

“Y/N shit~”

Todoroki stilled inside you, hovering over your body while you collapsed into the bed, exhausted mentally and physically. As Todoroki pulled out of you, you felt so empty but didn’t have the energy to move anymore. 

As if he could read your mind Todoroki picked you up and pulled you toward the top of the bed rest you on a few pillows. He stood up to walk to the bathroom and grab a warm towel to clean you up. Coming back into the room he kneeled down to your core, gently cleaning your sensitive areas.

“Am I hurting you?”

“No, I’m okay, just keep doing that. It feels nice actually” Sighing you let your body fully relax into the mattress underneath you. Todoroki stood up and tossed the towel into the hamper and came back to lay on the bed with you. Giving your poor attempt at grabby hands due to your exhaustion he chuckled and slid next to you. Grabbing your hand in his he rubbed his thumb over the side of your hand.

You scooted closer to him moving his arm so you could lay your head on his chest. With all the attitude having left your body you were completely soft with him. 

“Are you still mad at me?”

Instant regret filled him, all of his actions from the night finally catching up with him.

“Y/N, I could never stay mad at you. Sometimes I don’t realize how much I ignore my emotions. I’m sorry for having you be at the receiving end of my frustrations. I just can’t bear the thought of losing you. You mean so much to me.”

“It’s okay, at least the sex was good. I would just hate you ever truly being mad at me and I wanted to make sure.”

“Y/N. I am thoroughly and undoubtedly obsessed with you. You’re my little ember and I can’t imagine my life without you in it. I couldn’t ask for anything more in life because you’ve given me everything I could’ve ever wanted.” 

With a smile across your face and sleep beginning to take over your eyelids, you tried your best to stay up with him while he confessed himself to you.

“You know I’ll love you forever Sho.”

Todoroki looked down at you with a dubious gaze trying to pick apart your affirmation. 

“Forever?”

“Forever Shoto.”

“Good, because I could use a bit of forever in my life.” 

[kyleisme14]

My trip to Area 51 - unedited

On Facebook, a kid from Bakersfield created an event. He uses his page, perfectly named, shitposting because my life is in shambles and makes 'storm area 51, they can't stop us all' and seemingly overnight a million people said that they would be attending. I did attend. Shitposting because my life is in shambles is inadvertent the most zeitgeist worthy name for this page. Shitposting is when you share terrible content that you know is bad just to get a reaction. You are sharing a low effort joke for the sense of connection from others.  Because my life is in shambles, this anonymous statement of personal vulnerability, I shall try and make a low effort attempt at connection. This is what our age is all about. We are doomed to be as connected and as isolated as possible. This had a chance of being a real life meme where we'd be isolated no longer.

The page became an immediate stronghold for memes. It adopted other internet jokes like Karens asking to see managers, Kyle's drinking monster energy drink for invincibility, and Naruto runners being faster than bullets, as ways of infiltrating the base. And also generated new ones about what people would find inside Area 51 like the 10th doctor to recommend a toothpaste or where my girlfriend wants to go for dinner or how we'd sneak in with a minivan but escape with a space ship. The killer meme was how once we 'free them aliens' we'd keep them as lovers and bang them so hard that we 'clapped them cheeks'. This was the low effort comedy that this meme page generated.

Was it a joke or would people actually go? At first I did not know why I needed to go to area 51, and everybody seemed to ask me. I failed to recruit any friends to join me on the quest, 7 hours driving to the infamous base. Most thought I was crazy for going. My brother told me to be safe. My sister thought I was joking, and called to counter my bluff. Whenever somebody said they couldn't go, I pittied them because I was sure they were going to miss something incredible and life affirming. I was excited because I had no idea what was going to go down, and nobody in the whole world did. I stopped at the army surplus. I thought we'd either see a humanitarian crisis like fyre fest or a government crackdown. Don't forget, 2 million people clicked GOING online, so even if 1% came that'd be 10,000 people to a town with a population of  1000. The airforce released a warning about 'raiding' active military bases being a bad idea and the use of deadly force being a possibility. Lincoln County, one of nevadas sleepiest, had to call in enough police to potentially break up a neo-woodstock.

I always wanted to go to area 51 since I first learned about aliens as a kid. When I asked the big question of are we alone in the universe? If there was an answer, if somebody had the evidence, if it was anywhere, it was stored at area 51.  UFO's and little green men were hiding somewhere in Nevada... at least according to pop mythology. In grade school I would check out the same book over and over from the library, about aliens and the search for exterterestrial life and the scientists who were looking at the stars. There was a spooky section about times aliens might have visited early humans based on cave paintings and statues. And then the next page was all about area 51, where the government did secret expirements on alien artifacts and maybe had a specimen. So I've been captivated since at least then. Area 51 represents a big secret. A mystery! And somebody powerful, a general or established congress person, knows and is keeping the answers from us. So as an anti-establishment, meme and alien lover, I was fascinated with this 'movement,' that would of 'raid the base'. I wanted to go and find out how many people like me were out there! Turns out I wasn't completely alone! But... for the ignorant... What is Area 51? I could never believe people weren't following the biggest BREAKING news of our lives. But for those out of the loop, Area 51 is an infamous hotspot for UFO lovers. It has a rich history in alien folklore. But here is the factual history: Nevada is almost all federal land. and it was used back in the day for nuclear testing. an original tourist attraction to Las Vegas was watching nuclear testing in the distance...

Some airforce commanders were flying around dropping bombs when they spied a dried lakebed next to a mountain, Groom Lake. They landed on it and found it to be a perfectly flat natural runway. Excellent for testing expiremental aircraft. The facility became known as  Area 51. And was where the airforce and Lockheed Corp developed the U-2 stealth bomber. They brought the best and brightest scientists and engineers to develop new aeronautics and weaponry for the US military. At the height of the Cold War, any foreign technology that was aquired would be brought to Area 51 to be tested and backwards-engineered. You can imagine Chinese reactors and Russian jets being taken apart and used by the best tinkerer's and best test pilots. People at the highest levels of classified access. Because if you are one of the folks who are handling stolen foreign items, you are so classified that your spouse isn't supposed to know what you do all day. Yes honey, I was testing out the Ruskies new fighter plane! They don't even know we have it! These were experts in aeronautics and weapons science who could decipher technology even if the instructions were in another language... so perhaps if the US government were to encounter any other 'foreign technology' of an unknown origin, maybe they'd  send it to Area 51 to be backwards engineered? That's the set up, those are the facts, the rest is conjecture and tinfoil hats stuff. Like unexplained phenomena,  military released sightings that definitely aren't weather baloons and general mysticism. Do you believe in aliens or not?

If you believe that it's more likely that our government would keep aliens a secret than releasing that information to the public... welcome to the club! If not, do some reading. As I drove across the desert, down lonesome roads and through one horse towns, I realized what I was doing. I was driving into the middle of nowhere, likely to stand around doing nothing... and boy was I excited. My plan was to go and maybe film something and if that didn't work out I'd put on an alien costume and hold a sign. I figured that there'd be a bunch of cameras and I could use it to collectively protest all sorts of wrongs in the world. One of the initial reacitons to the playful event was, 'hey there are more imporant places to raid! why not raid the border detention centers, why not congress, why not the oil companies?' To which I say, hell yes... but that's not shitposting. That's being earnest and noble. This was about being ironic and part of a joke. This was about chasing an internet meme into the ground and disecting it until all that was left was the human connection. I had a sign and costume and figured that even if nobody showed up at least news organizations would be covering it.  The sign I held said, Peace on earth ain't coming from outer space, and I really believe that. We shouldn't expect peace to come from somewhere else in the universe, it has to start right here at home, inside each of us. I wanted to get that message out. The day of the event, due to classic internet decentralization, people debated whether the raid meet up (located at the Area 51 gate) should be at 3am on friday morning or 3am on saturday morning. Most people kind of agreed to just gather sporadically between those two times. I monitored a live stream late on thursday to confirm that millions of people weren't gathering to make American History. Instead, about 30 people gathered for that 3am moment. I only missed a photo-op. I awoke on friday morning and drove towards my destiny. There were two events scheduled. One hosted by the facebook Shitposting kid who decided to use his 15 minutes of fame to organize a rave in the desert at the local Little Ale'inn, a motel close to the gate. The other was set up by a filmmaker who made a movie about Area 51 at the Alien Research Center. Both locales are alien themed tchotchke paradises designed to sell the eager UFO tourist any manner of t-shirt, shot glass or Alien doll. These spots have a fun feel and would be desert trinket spots selling only desert sage and gems if not for the boon of being next to an infamous mystery base.

The dueling events were both hoping to capitalize on the rush of people to the desert for the raid. Alienstock, as shitpost called it, was going to be a kumbaya style gathering. But everybody thought it was an alibi for shitpost incase anybody got in actual trouble at the gate and roped him in. Shitpost from bakersfield ended up not even going to his own event out of fear. Also the county sued him for the cost of preparing for a potential fiasco. The Alien Research Center event was going to have famous Alien Community folks speak and some high end music performances. But as I drove down the dusty route 375, known as Exterterestrial Highway, I saw very few people on the roads. Lots and lots of cops. It became obvious that the whole county and the organizers of these events had been preparingor at least 30,000 people. They had nearly 200 port-a-potties. Which makes  sense, if 1% of the people who claimed they were coming online came! The reality was that maybe only 1% of 1% showed up to these sleepy nevada towns on the edge of a fabled military base. The imediate reality of the events was that they were extremely underattended, but that was also a blessing. it made everything a little bit more intimate and accessible. I pulled into the dusty parking lot of the Little Ale'inn to find a rag tag DIY music festival set up. People were essentially tailgating on the side of the road. It was a scene and it was dusty. All sorts of folks were jovially milling about, some in alien themed costume, many with cameras. Many folks with booze, despite the morning. I pulled out a camera and tried interviewing people, but found that everybody I talked to had the exact same talking points. Do you believe in aliens? Duh. Why are you here? Free them Aliens. Do you really think they are in the base? Yes, but maybe now they've been moved. What did you think would happen if we charged? We'd all get killed or arrested. Nobody seemed to have really believed in the facebook post's idea of 'they can't stop us all.' Most people were sure that, especially with the meager turn out, the military and police could stop us all. Everybody just wanted to see what would happen, expecting anywhere from fyre festival 2.0 to a bloodbath to nothing. Everybody had listened to the same Joe Rogan podcast, where he'd interviewed Bob Lazar who claims to have worked at the base. That podcast was the bible of this gathering and  was what had inspired Shitpost to shitpost.

It was special that everybody was a believer. That's rare that strangers are all on the same wavelength. Nobody seemed to have any doubts that the government knew about aliens and weren't telling the public. And it was agreed that UFO's had been tested and stored at the base. Everybody I ended up meeting seemed pretty prepared. They had plenty of water and booze and camping supplies, so the idea that a humanitarian crisis was going to occur dissapated completely and reminded me of a group outting to the desert. Most important was that everybody at the event seemed to be in on the joke. They might believe in aliens but had no plans of raiding the base in actuality. Aliens might exist but the might of the US government is way more certain. The police presence alone was insane, but they merely hinted at the military might behind the base's perimeter. The police actually became quite friendly once they realized it wasn't going to be a boodbath. But the silent and hooded guards behind the gate remained terrifying with big guns and big dogs. There was definitely the threat of violence if you crossed. But we all joked that maybe if a million more people showed up we'd actually start Naruto running passed the guards.

After a while of milling around quasi-interviewing people I decided there were enough people with cameras that I should just put on my alien costume and go to the gate and get in front of the camera. I was taken to the gate by some friends I'd made while trying to get interviews. Evan and Kevin were two dudes I became super weirdly close on the day of the Raid. Each of us had come by ourselves from far away, San Francisco, Boston and Los Angeles, with a vague intention of documenting it in some way. I had a vision of either a mini doc or article, Evan was a photographer and who took some insanely beautiful photos (featured here).

Kevin was a video creation guru who just wanted to make as much instagram content as possible. Kevin was by far the most successful, he's got that showman's knack to always get on camera with insanely high energy. There were a lot of cameras and each one he'd run up to and start lecturing about how the governemnt needed to release the secret documents! It was a great bit especially with his Boston Townie accent turned all the way up.

Evan explained how he was drawn to the site by a mysterious desire to see what would happen.  He expressed it best as, 'this is like a reddit safe post.' People will find safes while remodeling or cleaning a house and say, 'hey reddit, look i found a safe, i'm going to open it and see what's inside!' Then people get excited trying to guess what marvelous jackpot could be in that old dusty safe. They wait desperately for the original poster to share an update. More often than not the poster never returns and people are left waiting for nothing.

Once and a while there will be an updated post to show what was found inside and sometime's it's a haul of trinkets and dubloons and rare items that were saved throughout time to be found by some noble internet user. but then most of the time it's like, wow a roll of coins from 1953! "so yeah i felt obligated to go and find out what was in the safe and share it with reddit even if there actually was nothing inside. reddit deserves to know.' evan said. Because sometimes those posts are just as important, the safe find coming back to say, 'hey we cracked the safe, but turns out there was nothing in it! here's a picture of an empty safe."

So I was beginning to realize that I was standing inside an empty safe. But wow, all of these people had also come to be here and that was something special. It's not often that we get to organically be around likeminded strangers that all have such clear and imediate shared experience. Here we all were, because of a a meme, just to see what would happen. The gathering had a magical quality because we were an internet joke that had left the cyber space and entered the meat space. It was a silly idea that was reaching a physical end point.

I stood around the gate for a good while, we chatted with everybody, shook hands with the police guarding the gate, exchanged instagram handles and shared jokes we'd heard on the internet. You could tell people were really cutting loose. Most people spent most of their time on their computers it seemed. Hey, me too. We shouted 'clap them cheeks' and 'let them out.' We were all in on the joke. There were still mainly cameras and I got interviewed and photographed by dozens including history channels ancient aliens and the nytimes and countless youtubers and instagramers. It all kind of culminated when Kevin and Evan were getting cold and saying we should leave, I heard a distant 'clap them cheeks' chant and booty shuffling down the lonesome road to the infamous Area 51 gate was Riley Reid! Pornhub's number 1 star. She's somebody I have searched for all my life, on google. She did a strip tease and pretended to rush the gate. She was an internet hero in the flesh, and she was in on the joke too! A perfect metaphor, eh?

The next morning, hungover from the excitement and extrovertism of the day before I was sitting in a diner scouring news websites for mentions of the raid and looking for photos of myself. Behind me I heard some locals discussing, a gravelly voice said, "usually this town has 1 car every 10 minutes. this weekend we've got like 1 car every minute!" The townsfolk seemed to have had the wildest weekend of their lives. Me too. I managed to get into a few articles in my green alien suit.  A USA Today affiliate newspaper even printed a whole write up about me and my sign. On the way back, realizing I expected nothing, and found little more than nothing, I was completely satisfied. I had held my sign for peace and found a version of it, internet strangers, weirdos from all over had gathered peacefully to celebrate an idea. A silly and anti authoritarian conspiracy idea, but an idea none the less. I decided the reason I was drove all this way through beautiful american desert land, was because it's something I would have thought was cool as an 11 year old. A mission to see aliens and the people who wanted to meet them. Radical.

[akisazame]

“Okay, weird pillow talk.”

The DVD commentary meme got me thinking about cut content, which reminded me of this huge swath of words I had to bulldoze out of Greg’s chapter of solutions because they were just not going the way I needed them to. What really bummed me out about this is that my personal favorite bits of Greg/Rebecca dialogue that I wrote happened to be in there, and at the time I wasn’t using tumblr so I figured it’d all just sit in my slush file until the end of time because there was such a slim chance I’d ever write a fic where I could reincorporate it. WELL NOW I’M BACK ON THIS BAD WEBSITE SO HERE IT IS.

This text is obviously kinda rough since it never went through my probably-too-rigorous revisions wringer, so that and an absurd amount of commentary are behind the Read More.

The first draft of Greg’s chapter went swimmingly right up until the necessary conflict of Rebecca and Greg hashing out all the weird bullshit inherent in 104′s plot. My first tactic had Rebecca swinging wildly for the fences, really cashing in on the theme of Greg identifying himself as a runner-up and Rebecca’s inability to stop thinking about the other guys (but like, come on, Nathaniel is clearly a better kisser than Greg). This picks up directly after their post-kiss “I know I’m just some dalliance to you” argument, but instead of Rebecca softening in the face of Greg’s “I bet you say that to all the guys” comment, she bristles and drops a truth bomb.

She hates this, she hates this so much, and she panics. "I moved to West Covina for Josh Chan," Rebecca blurts out. She hadn't meant to say it, has no idea why she said it. It's absurd, after the excessive word mincing she did when she actually was trying to say it to Josh, to just casually drop it now as a non-sequitur. She slaps both her hands over her mouth and stares at Greg, wide-eyed.

And that’s exactly what Greg has been waiting to hear.

There's a long beat where Greg just stares right back at her. Then he scrubs both hands over his face and sighs. "Thank you."

Rebecca blinks. "What?"

"For being honest," Greg says. He shrugs and sticks his hands into his pockets, nonchalant. "I'll just be going then? Great. Have a nice life, Rebecca."

He's halfway to the door before Rebecca fully processes what's happening. It can't happen like this. She can't fuck this up again. "Can you please just hear me out?"

For a half second she thinks he'll ignore her and keep walking, out the door and out of her life. But he doesn't. He stops, turns, looks back at her. She can't interpret the expression on his face.

In a way this all rings true, but at the same time it doesn’t feel earned, and a dramatic storm-out definitely wasn’t the way to go with a time travel redo of a scene that ends with Greg dramatically storming out.

She finds her way to the couch and sits, elbows resting on her knees, chin cupped in her palms. "I moved to West Covina for Josh Chan," she repeats, the thesis statement of her whole goddamn life. "And when I did it, I thought that Josh Chan was the only person who could possibly make me happy. But that's not true at all." Those damned emotions are back again, and she takes a deep breath, swallows them down. "I haven't been fair or even nice to you since the moment we met."

I really liked the “thesis statement of her whole goddamn life” line. “I haven’t been fair or even nice to you since the moment we met” was luckily resurrected for Rebecca’s post-coital crisis.

As she spoke, Greg had been slowly making his way back through the apartment, and now he lowers himself down next to her on the couch. "I'd say that's accurate."

Rebecca tilts her head in her hands to look at him. "But, uh, don't take this the wrong way? You haven't been especially fair or nice to me, either."

Here’s where the published chapter dipped back in for a hot second: Rebecca asked what the purpose of their date was, except instead of “Why waste your time, if you didn’t think it could go anywhere?” she said “It’s pretty clear you never believed any of my lies about Josh.” Then they had the whole “maybe liked or maybe past tense” back-and-forth, leading into the kiss. But instead of really going to town on Greg’s face, Rebecca softballs it (can you tell I did a surgical 180 on “It's the type of kiss that Rebecca, who's never learned how to modulate her feelings of affection, truly excels in”? because I fuckin forgot I did that), and then realizes she has more shit to say because first draft Rebecca was massively self-destructive.

She slides her hands down to his shoulders and breaks the kiss, but she doesn't move away, instead pressing her forehead to his, noses touching. "Hey," she says, breathless, "I need to tell you something." Before it's too late, she doesn't add.

"Lot of things you have to tell me today," Greg teases. He tries to pull away, maybe to silence her with another kiss, but she holds firm, arms encircling his neck to keep him in place.

I thought Greg’s reply was really cute (I imagined it in the same cadence as “Long name I have, what is that, Polish?”), but I’m sure he liked getting a blowjob better.

I have to tell you today because we might not get another chance, she thinks frantically. Rebecca's allergy to honesty poisoned so many of her relationships, but it manifested at its worst with Greg, who almost seemed as though he wanted to be lied to. When she told him he wasn't second place, he wanted to believe it. Even today he'd admitted that he wanted to pretend she could love him best. As much as she wants to tell him that again, it's not healthy. It's never been healthy.

Part of the reason all this had to go was that the drama overstayed its welcome. By this point it felt like the whole thing was needlessly treading water.

She closes her eyes and swallows, choking back her doubts. None of this is real anyway, Greg had said. He's wrong, at least for right now, but he could be right. If she really screws this up, she can throw it all away. Maybe that's cowardly, but it's the only thing giving her courage. "The truth is, I've spent a truly embarrassing amount of today thinking about other guys."

"Okay, weird pillow talk," Greg mutters.

GREG IS SO FUNNY IN THIS DRAFT OH MY GOD. I’m sorry, Greg. But, again, you got that blowjob you’d been waiting for, so.

"You thanked me for being honest," Rebecca shoots back, leaning back just a bit so she can glare at him, "so I'm gonna keep being honest. When I woke up this morning, I was thinking about another guy. Right before you picked me up, I was thinking about two other guys. When we were at the taco festival, talking about stuff, sometimes I was thinking about other guys." She presses her lips together, exhales through her nose. "When you were kissing me in the kitchen, I was thinking about another guy."

I don’t know why I thought I had to give Rebecca’s inner monologue its due diligence, because it’s so completely unnecessary. At this point I’d been noodling away at this chapter for a month and a half (for whatever reason, the Homeland Security Advisory System section when Greg and Rebecca get back to her apartment was the very first thing in the document) and I was coming off of having mostly finalized Josh’s chapter, so I guess I thought complete reckless honesty was Rebecca’s natural evolution.

Greg has clearly had enough of whatever he thinks she's trying to do, because he reaches up and unhooks her arms from around his neck. "Okay, stop..."

"What I'm trying to say is," Rebecca says, wriggling free from his grasp and reversing it, grabbing hold of his wrists, "I'm not gonna, like, never be thinking about anyone else when I'm with you, because I don't have one of those Men In Black memory erasers, despite the fact that I could really use one sometimes, and also because I'm a person, who interacts with other people, and has feelings about other people." He's just staring at her, incredulous, and part of her wishes she hadn't done this, that she had just played along with him from the moment they stepped into the apartment, but how would that have changed anything apart from not having to waste half a year hating each other? "But that doesn't mean I'm not capable of putting you first. I know I can. I'm sorry I've done such a terrible job of proving it."

NOW WE’RE IN IT. This is the part I hated cutting, the part I tried really desperately to fit back in somehow. Rebecca loves other people so fiercely that she can’t ever detach herself from any of them, even in situations when she should, and her taking a constant interest in other people is completely incompatible with season 1 Greg’s inferiority complex and self-deprecation. (Also I’m definitely laughing at how I had Rebecca break off mid-monologue to question what the fuck her writer is even doing.)

There's a moment where Greg doesn't say anything, just continuing to stare at her like she's a complicated puzzle to solve. Rebecca forces herself to keep breathing, to keep calm despite the fluttering of her heart in her chest.

Then, just when she thinks she's about to pass out from anxiety, Greg says, "Neuralyzer."

Rebecca blinks. "What?"

He leans back a bit, just the hint of a smile on his face. "A neuralyzer. The Men In Black memory eraser. That's what it's called."

"Oh my god." She lets go of his wrists so she can swipe at his arm, which he skillfully dodges. "You are such a nerd."

"For knowing a fact about a classic film from our childhood? Please." She swings for him again, still annoyed, but this time he catches her hand, pulling her off-balance so she sways towards him. Then his other arm is around her waist, catching her, pulling her close. They fall into this kiss as naturally as breathing, his lips parting beneath hers as he begins to really smile now, and she finds herself smiling too, helpless.

This is way cuter and funnier than anything that actually made it into the chapter and I’M SAD ABOUT IT, STILL, TO THIS DAY.

When they break apart again, this time she's the one who doesn't want to move away. She tries to chase after him but he ducks his head, pressing a kiss to her jawline instead. "I want to believe you, Rebecca..." he breathes against her skin.

She must be broken, she thinks, because for some reason her body has decided that Greg's whispered admission of mistrust is what's gonna flip her switch from amorous to ravenous. Or maybe it's some weird time travel brain chemistry thing, because this is right about the time she would've been getting laid by the rando guacamole vegan. Whatever the reason, her eyes flutter closed and she tips her head back slightly, wordlessly encouraging him to keep kissing her; he takes the hint and continues, trailing down her neck to the hollow of her throat. "It's okay," she says, wrapping both arms around his neck so she can pull herself closer, pressing her body against his. "You don't have to yet. Just..."

Honestly I think at this point I STILL hadn’t decided if they were going to fuck at the end of this chapter, which is ABSURD. That indecision definitely contributed to the circling the drain feeling that this draft had. At least I got to mine out the “weird time travel brain chemistry” bit and double down with “the transitive property of getting fucked in another timeline” because I feel like I’d lived my whole life up to that point just to write that sentence.

She doesn't get to finish her sentence because he's moving her, pressing her down on the couch beneath him, sliding his hands up under her shirt. A quiet voice in Rebecca's brain points out that this is weird, going from her strange confessions directly into a hot and heavy makeout sesh, but the rest of her brain reminds her that at least this time she's hooking up with her actual date. Besides, her body is wholeheartedly consenting to this activity, and who is she to judge?

This inner monologue is still pretty funny, but this is the point where I stopped, stared at the draft, and muttered “what are you doing?” like Rebecca to the Hitler documentary. I had basically 1300 words that, while occasionally funny and insightful, barely propelled the narrative. I still fought for some of it for a while (similarly, I had a joke that I fought tooth and nail for in revisions for Nathaniel’s chapter), but in the end Greg’s chapter was better without all that weird random baggage.