#Nerk Writes

[werkthenerk]

Comfy-vember Day 4: "Bed Rest"

Lil Laura AU info here <-

Laura didn’t like that Vati was sick. It started when Kurt hadn’t been able to take her to the Planetarium for their field trip. She’d gotten up and ready at 5:30 AM as usual, and had even tied her own shoes before coming down to help set the table for breakfast. Instead of seeing Vati at the stove making pancakes, it was Papa making eggs!

Laura knew that wasn’t right… usually Vati made pancakes, and they did spelling before going out to say goodbye to Papa and Dad for the day. Victor smiles and rumbles happily as Laura hugs him around the middle, but frowns as he sees her look of confusion. 

“What is it, Cub? Is something wrong?”

Laura nods slowly, looking around the kitchen, “...where’s Vati?”

Victor goes quiet for a moment, reaching down to smooth Laura’s crazy hair as he scrambles the eggs with his other hand, “He’s not feeling well today, Cub. Dad is in the bedroom making sure he’s ok.”

Laura frowns, leaning into Victor’s touch, “He’ll feel better soon though, right? His healing factor will make him feel good before going to the Planetarium.”

“No, Cub. He’s going to be in bed for a couple of days; Vati doesn’t heal like we do, and Dad and I are pretty sure he has the flu. You’ll have to go to the Planetarium another day.”

Laura nods as Victor pulls his hand away to take the eggs off the stove. Looking towards her parents’ bedroom door, she looks up at Victor again as he plates the eggs with a couple slices of toast. 

“Can I help you carry those to Vati?” 

Victor smiles, offering her a plate, “Both hands.”

As he grabs the other three plates and a cup of tea, Victor watches as Laura pushes the door open quietly, the darkened room lit by only one bedside lamp. They’re met by the smell of vapor rub and the sound of Kurt’s coughing, Logan at his side, doing his best to keep the man comfortable. Laura comes around to Kurt’s side of the bed, looking up to see Nightcrawler blowing his nose into a hanky. The Elf smiles weakly as he sees Laura, flopping back into the pillows propped up behind him. 

“Guten morgen, Liebchen… es tut meir lied, I don’t think ve’ll be able to go to zhe museum today.” 

Laura nods, holding the breakfast offerings out to him, “That’s ok, Vati… I just want you to feel better. Papa and I brought you breakfast.”

Logan reaches across, taking the plate carefully from Laura in Kurt’s stead. Setting it in his lap, Kurt smiles a bit as Laura climbs up to be beside him. 

“I am not so veak zhat I cannot lift my own plate, but danke, you three.” Kurt chuckles, but devolves into a coughing fit. Covering his mouth with his elbow, it takes him a moment to be able to breathe clearly again. 

Logan and Victor seem worried, Laura looking at her parents’ faces in order to gauge her response. She’d never really been sick, or around a sick person before; all she knew is that she wanted Vati better. 

“Sounds like you’ll be on bed rest for the remainder of the week, Elf.” Logan takes his and Laura’s plates, sitting in the bed beside Kurt. 

Victor sits on the floor on Kurt’s other side, leaning against the nightstand, “...wouldn’t doubt it if you still need rest getting into the weekend, too.”

As Laura is handed her plate of eggs and toast, she points to the mug of tea by Victor’s side, “Don’t forget Vati’s tea!”

Victor smiles, nodding, “Good remembering, Cub.”

Nightcrawler accepts the tea gratefully, sipping it carefully as he elects to favor the fluids over the food. Sighing, the man looks to Laura with a half smile, “Haschen, you look worried.”

Laura nods, half-heartedly picking at her eggs. Logan gently pats her on the shoulder, squeezing gently, “Vati will be fine, Kiddo. He just has to rest.”

“Maybe you can help nurse me back to health, ja?” Kurt chuckles, but coughs again, “I’d love it if you’d read me a story, Haschen.”

With a determined look in her eyes, Laura quickly scarfs her toast, setting the plate aside as she scrambles off of the bed. They watch as she runs towards her room, pulling the door open. It isn’t long before Laura returns with a stack of children’s books, biting her lip in concentration as she attempts to balance them. Sitting on the end of the bed, she pulls a book off of the top of the pile and crawls up next to Kurt. 

Snuggling next to the man, she opens the book and looks up at him, “Can you still help me with the big words?”

Kurt smiles, nodding. Settling back, he wraps an arm around Laura’s waist and sips his tea with his free hand. 

“Once upon a time…”

---

Laura sleeps beside Kurt, book propped against her chest. Kurt snores as well, arm still draped loosely around his daughter’s waist. Logan and Victor look at each other from the doorway, impressed both of them had made it that far through the pile of books. It’d been several hours since they’d started reading at breakfast, a gentle stream of sunlight falling across the bed. 

“He’s finally asleep,” Victor whispers, smiling, “...Cub did it.”

Logan nods, crossing the room silently to pull a blanket up over both of them. 

[crepesuzette2023]

Hi, I would love recs for mclennon fics dripping in sexual tension, like six hours in August by stonedlennon. It doesn't need to have explicit sexual content. Thank you!

Thank you so, so much for this ask—this is a category of fiction I personally enjoy *a lot* (imagine Paul's "I slept with John..." pronunciation).

Here are some favorites that came to my mind. Some have sex on the page, others do not; I remember all of these as having excellent Tension™. I hope you find something you like here! Young J/P:

Streets of Your Town (@with-eyes-closed): Sensual. The upheaval in young Paul's mind as he falls in love with music and John, without putting a name to it. As of yet unfinished, but it's so good I rec it anyway, because it's...[read to find out, take a fan]

All I Know Since Yesterday (RedheadAmongWolves): Paul and John's first kiss at Paul's, after long, sweet hours of trembling fear/excitement. Paul POV.

The Way Things Sometimes Are (@paisanas): Young John is troubled and pining for Paul. Paul is mesmerizing through his eyes.

now and then (there's a fool such as I) (@stonedlennon): The Nerk Twins take the bus to Caversham and share a bed. You can smell the summer grass and the sweaty leathers...

(Ain't no cure for the) summertime blues (orphan_account): John and Paul alone on a hot summer day.

The Photograph (thinkpink20): John finds a Photograph Mike took of Paul and notices...things.

Hamburg:

ageless children, animal sweat (eyeball2eyeball): Read this story to spend time in John's throbbing, unhinged Hamburg mind. No sex on the page, and yet. It's *everywhere*. For such a short story, it takes up a lot of room in my brain. The Paul in this story is one of my favorite Pauls.

Sinful City (thinkpink20). Days and Nights in Hamburg. Paul needs John, and stops questioning things.

In Margaret Asher's music room:

Tell You Something (@louiselux). Lennon and McCartney write "I Want to Hold Your Hand." The tension rises.

In or near Paul's Geodesic Dome:

shotgunning (@pauls1967moustache): John and Paul languidly try something new...

Chrysalis (cloudy_blue): Tension in 1967. Hypnotic and stylish, I love it.

Stop all the Clocks (@javelinbk): After Brian's death, John and Paul retreat to Scotland. Grief and awakening ensue...slowly and sweetly.

Greece:

Way Up Top (@boshemians). Snapshots of J/P desire and spiraling doubts, contained in the Beatles' trip to Greece to buy an island.

Nineteen Sixty-Eight:

Outro (bakerstreetafternoon). From the Summary: 'Had it been this tension that had kept them together? Had it always?'

Bad Luck to Talk (7intheevening): Paul chats with JohnandYoko at a party and follows them home for a cup of tea. What hurts more exquisitly than pining? Unacknowledged pining.

John I'm Only Dancing (@skylikeaflame): Amidst the insanity of the Mad Day Out, desire erupts relentlessly.

The 70's as they should have been:

Down on the Farm (RosalindBeatrice): Incredibly hot and realistic (and funny in just right amounts!). John visits Paul in Nashville; Paul shows off Wings and the family, John stays the night. Dot dot dot.

I can only speak my mind (@paisanas): John's diaries are leaked to the press and printed; Paul reads them. What follows is the sexual awakening of James Paul McCartney as he reads of John's feelings for him. First rate pining, past and present.

I still miss someone/ I know that I miss you, but I don't know where I stand/ close the door lightly when you go (RosalindBeatrice): John and Paul meet in 1976. There is a spark. Few and far between meetings follow.

The Other Eighties (John lives and experiences sexual tension with Paul):

and when broken bodies are washed ashore (who am i to ask for more) (wardo wedidit): John divorces Yoko and visits Paul in Scotland. Soul searching and relationship mending.

The Birthday Party (@merseydreams): John and Paul meet at Ringo's Birthday Party. There is only one bed.

Tension through the Years:

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes (@savageandwise). John is turned on by Paul smoking. 1958—1969.

[franklyimissparis]

who’s who in “let ‘em in” by wings (1976)

and some other thoughts on the song

prefacing this by saying that paul himself has changed his own interpretations and offered many explanations up for each name mentioned in the song! i don't necessarily think there's one right answer about what's about who - paul is known for writing about multiple things at once and having many layers of inspiration behind his lyrics. i will mostly be focusing on the names paul lists off within the song, in the order they appear, starting with:

- sister suzy: suzy was linda mccartney's alter ego within her own band, suzy and the red stripes which was active at the time this song was written. paul has stated on many occasions, including in “the lyrics”, that sister suzy is a reference to linda.

- brother john: a lot of articles reference brother john as being john eastman, linda's brother, while others reference john lennon. paul himself said it could be either. but if we're being honest, the first person paul's gonna think of when someone says “john” is lennon, hands down.

it's worth noting the use of sister when describing linda, paul's wife. while it could make sense in the context of the line brother john being john eastman (john and linda being actual brother and sister to one another), i think it's valid to examine the other potential meanings as well, particularly if we think of brother john as john lennon. it places paul's relation to them both as, firstly, familial and implies an equality in the roles they've served within paul's life. starting the list of people with linda (placing her as the most important as the lot) and then john second is interesting as well. we've seen countless examples of paul and john both comparing their relationships with their wives to their relationships with each other and i think it's striking that paul does this here, whether consciously or not.

(nowadays, paul's brother and sister in law via his wife nancy are actually named jon and susie, coincidentally enough.)

- martin luther: paul writes in "the lyrics" that this is about MLK which i'm sure it partially is but also there is an account of the other three beatles jokingly calling john "john martin luther lennon" in the early days though i couldn't find a solid source for this. there is the infamous 1985 hunter davies quote from paul's off the record phone call with him where he called john “martin luther lennon" but that was obviously years after let 'em in and in a massively different context (though potentially this could suggest that it’s a comparison he’s mentally made before but that’s a bit of a stretch, evidence wise lol). i’ve also heard people say martin luther could potentially be a reference to george martin as well, which is possible. others have speculated that this is a reference specifically to martin luther and the 95 theses (“knocking on the door" i.e. nailing the theses to the door) which paul says may have been true on an unconscious level but wasn't purposeful.

- phil and don: the everly brothers, one of paul and john's earliest and biggest influences as young lads. they were heavily inspired by the everly brothers when they performed as their duo, the nerk twins. they also referred to themselves as the foreverly brothers on other occasions.

- brother michael: paul's brother mike, unsurprisingly. though paul also states in “the lyrics” that this might have been a reference to michael jackson as the timing works with paul and linda meeting the jackson 5 around the same time as well but i think realistically he probably mostly had mike mccartney in mind with this one.

- auntie jin: paul’s real and favourite auntie from liverpool. saw one very rogue take that it’s meant to sound like ‘antigen’ but, quite frankly, i think that’s a bit horseshite.

- uncle ernie: in “the lyrics”, paul mentions that he has a cousin called ian who was sometimes referred to as "ern". but also states that at this point he was just playing with words and sounds and this probably wasn't his intention. previously, paul has attributed the line as a reference to keith moon, who was close to the mccartneys in the 70s prior to his death and played the character of uncle ernie in the film tommy (1975). it also could refer to ringo starr as well, as he voiced uncle ernie in the LSO's recording of tommy. ringo himself referenced let 'em in ("someone's knocking on the door/someone's ringing my bell") in 2003 in the song "english garden" which suggests that, at the very least, he felt as though there was some connection to him there.

- uncle ian: like previously stated, paul has mentioned his cousin ian as potentially inspiring this line but personally i think uncle ian could be a reference to paul himself. "ian iachimoe" (meant to phonetically sound out "paul mccartney" backwards) is one of paul's many pseudonyms, thought to have been created around 1966. he signed the lyrics of paperback writer with "yours sincerely, ian iachimoe" and it is also said that in order to distinguish themselves from the rest of his mail, paul would tell his close friends and family to address letters to ian iachimoe so he would know to read them.

paul referred to "let 'em in" as the musical equivalent of a "stocking stuffer" in “the lyrics” which i'm sure it was in his mind but me and my tin hat will be reading deeper into it as usual! this song reminds me quite a lot of “call me back again" in the sense that i think (subconsciously) it may be a bit of a poke at john to get in contact with him.

it's important to note that the album was written/recorded/released around the time of the infamous “it isn't 1956 anymore” incident where, according to john, paul kept showing up at the dakota with his guitar after sean was born without calling ahead. john would let him in but would be a bit put off about it until one day he gave paul a bit of shite for it and paul took it quite personally. while the actual incident is noted as happening in april of 1976 (according to the beatles bible) if it's true that, as john says, this happened a few times there could have also been some tension with paul appearing at john's in the prior months before paul recorded the song in february of 1976.

paul has spoken of the song as reminiscent of a typical party in liverpool where there's sort of a constant stream of family and friends coming through the door - this could be something paul is nudging john to remember (especially with the references to their teenage musical influences and acquaintances and paul's family members that john himself once knew personally.) something along the lines of "oh come on, john, you've gotta just let people into your life, you can't shut out the people who love and miss you. this is how it used to be with us, don't you remember those days?" ... but that's just my interpretation. anyway sorry this was so long but i just thought i'd share in case some of you hadn't heard all the possible interpretations of the lines :))

[anotherkindofmindpod]

Mocking Paul

Tune In’s take on Paul’s “Uncool” Musical Tastes

NOTE: The purpose of this analysis is not to exaggerate the severity of John’s onstage behavior which could have (at least occasionally) been conducted in good fun and camaraderie. The object is to determine whether or not Tune In is capable of presenting John’s disruptive and/or undermining behavior objectively in a way that allows the reader to judge the appropriateness of such behavior.

–

Multiple times throughout the book, Lewisohn writes with seeming approval about John undercutting Paul’s “soft” songs or musical tastes.

Here are five examples of this happening live, onstage:

On page 614, Lewisohn tells us how “Paul would flutter his eyelashes when he sang certain songs,” and calls "Somewhere Over the Rainbow” “one of [Paul’s] flutter numbers, guaranteed to go down a storm with the girls.”

Tune In describes John teasing Paul onstage: “John pointed to Paul, burst into raucous laughter and shouted, ‘God, he’s doing Judy Garland!’ Paul had to keep singing in the knowledge that John was pulling crips and Quasis behind his back or making strange sounds on his guitar to interrupt him.”

Of this, Lewisohn writes, “There were always several simultaneous reasons why an audience couldn’t take their eyes off the Beatles.”

About “Besame Mucho,” we get a quote from Lindy Ness: “When Paul sang ‘Besame Mucho,’ John used to stand behind him and make cripple faces. He had to: Paul was asking for it.” (p761).

During “A Taste of Honey,” John interrupts Paul’s performance by yelling at the audience. Lewisohn calls this behavior an example of “the Nerk Twins’ chemistry” (p1178).

When Paul sings “Till There Was You,” “[John] speaks most of the lines in a persistent piss-taking echo: ‘No, I never heard them at all’ (‘No, he never heard them’)” and Lewisohn writes, “[Paul’s] not even necessarily cross about it—he knows it’ll happen because this is John, and John is his fairground hero.” He also writes, “It’s part of the double-act, one among so many reasons they're special together” (p1178).

Also about “Till There Was You”: “John really had a go at Paul for singing this—but didn’t try to stop him doing it, recognizing there was scope for all kinds of music in this group, to please all kinds of audiences” (p615).

Does it sound like John is preoccupied with projecting a “cool” image? We think so. Perhaps his undermining behavior garnered the praise and approval of a few (like Lindy Ness), but it could hardly be described as supportive of his partner (or reflective of good “leadership”).

And yet, Tune In always assures us that John is being awesome. Sometimes even a "hero."

Instead of dispassionately framing John’s behavior as immature or insecure upstaging, Lewisohn calls John’s attention-seeking antics a part of John and Paul’s “chemistry,” which is “special” and a “[reason] why an audience couldn’t take their eyes off the Beatles.”

And, of course, we hear once again that John is Paul’s “fairground hero.”

Somehow, by mocking Paul doing his “flutter numbers” John is “recognizing there’s scope for all kinds of music.”

Note that, according to Tune In, Paul himself isn’t recognizing scope by choosing and singing the songs (even in the face of mockery); John is recognizing scope by allowing him to do it (while simultaneously making fun of him for it).

–

Our final example is one where John doesn’t even allow Paul to finish his performance, and Tune In uses this to pay John the biggest compliment yet.

Regarding the Beatles’ live performance of Elvis’s hit single “Are You Lonesome Tonight”, only days after its release:

“Paul set down his guitar, clasped the microphone and did his Elvis act, the great solo star crooning his new slow one. It was already going to pot when he went into the long spoken-word middle section about ‘all the world’s a stage,’ which he’d crammed into his brain inside a few hours … and then John just stopped the group dead.

Refusing to be involved in anything so corny, John completely took the piss out of Paul, ripping his close mate and bandmate to shreds in front of everyone. ‘They sent me up rotten,’ Paul says, ‘especially John. They all but laughed me off the stage.’”

So from this description and Paul’s quote, we can surmise that the Beatles had rehearsed and prepared the number, “spoken-word middle section” and all. Why then, did John not object to the corny, spoken-word interlude during rehearsal? Assuming John’s mid-performance "piss-take" was not a comedy routine pre-planned by all the Beatles, this anecdote suggests that John knowingly set Paul up for public ridicule and relished the opportunity to pull the rug out from under him onstage.

To be clear, this would be a perfectly fine choice if Paul was in on the joke and consented to the bit. But deliberately setting Paul up to fail is unambiguously un-cool.

Nevertheless, here’s how Lewisohn justifies John’s behavior:

“This was the way John dealt with things, and he also knew the Beatles must have a solid front line, not back a soloist. As he said, ‘Every group had a lead singer in a pink jacket singing Cliff Richard-type songs. We were the only group that didn’t … and that was how we broke through, by being different'” (586).

There’s no reason to connect John’s quote about “being different” to this anecdote (the footnote indicates his quote is taken from a December 1969 interview called “Pop Goes the Bulldog”) except to spin John’s behavior in the noblest way possible.

Paul wasn’t trying to be “a lead singer in a pink jacket”—he was merely taking the lead vocal just as John and George did in their turn. Did John also stop the band dead in the middle of his own solo spots, in order to ensure they kept a “solid front line” that would allow them to “[break] through by being different"? Of course not. John is simply covering his embarrassment here, insecure about perceived softness, and seeking negative attention.

(For readers who may think we're overblowing this topic, imagine for a moment if Paul was doing this to George Harrison onstage. Would Paul’s behavior be praised?)

It’s outrageous for Lewisohn to spin John's every behavior into something awesome (“audiences couldn’t take their eyes off”; “fairground hero”), visionary (“we broke through by being different”), egalitarian (“solid front line”) broad-minded (“recognizing there was scope for all kinds of music”), and indicative of a GOOD PARTNER, actually (“part of the double-act”; “Nerk Twins’ chemistry”; “special together”).

Meanwhile, Paul is “asking for it” by doing “flutter numbers” “guaranteed to go down a storm with the girls,” “making his eyes big,” being “so corny,” and trying to be “the great solo star,” like a Cliff Richard knockoff “in a pink jacket.” Does this portrayal look even-handed?

—//—

FULL EXCERPTS:

“[‘Are You Lonesome Tonight’] came out in Britain on Friday, January 13, and they did it the next night at Aintree Institute. Paul set down his guitar, clasped the microphone and did his Elvis act, the great solo star crooning his new slow one. It was already going to pot when he went into the long spoken-word middle section about ‘all the world’s a stage,’ which he’d crammed into his brain inside a few hours … and then John just stopped the group dead.

Refusing to be involved in anything so corny, he completely took the piss out of Paul, ripping his close mate and bandmate to shreds in front of everyone. ‘They sent me up rotten,’ Paul says, ‘especially John. They all but laughed me off the stage.’ This was the way John dealt with things, and he also knew the Beatles must have a solid front line, not back a soloist. As he said, ‘Every group had a lead singer in a pink jacket singing Cliff Richard-type songs. We were the only group that didn’t … and that was how we broke through, by being different’” (586).

—//—

“We always requested Paul to sing ‘Long Tall Sally.’ He used to say, ‘I can’t do it because it kills me throat,’ but then he would. He’d announce, ‘I’m doing this one for these two flossies over here,’ or something like that. Girls used to say his eyes were like mince pies. He had long eyelashes and would deliberately flutter them, and though you knew he was always aware of himself, he was so friendly to everybody that you couldn’t help but like him.’ —BERNADETTE FARRELL

One of the flutter numbers was ‘Over the Rainbow,’ guaranteed to go down a storm with the girls. The song from The Wizard of Oz seemed a strange choice, but the Beatles considered it valid because Gene Vincent did it. Paul sang it somewhere between the two versions, pausing impressively after the heightened ‘Somewhere’ and then sweetly rolling down. Cavern girls would get used to the sight: he made his eyes big, turned his face up and slightly at an angle and fixed his gaze above their heads on a brick at the far end of the center tunnel.

Sometimes John joined in with fine harmonies, but mostly he took the piss. Pete says that during one Cavern performance of ‘Over the Rainbow,’ John leaned back on the piano, pointed to Paul, burst into raucous laughter and shouted, ‘God, he’s doing Judy Garland!’ Paul had to keep singing in the knowledge that John was pulling crips and Quasis behind his back or making strange sounds on his guitar to interrupt him. Yet, if Paul stopped in the middle of the number, John would stare around the stage, the essence of innocence. There were always several simultaneous reasons why an audience couldn’t take their eyes off the Beatles.

Paul took such behavior from no one but John, but also he gave it back and was strong-minded enough to carry on doing what he wanted, knowing how much the audience liked it. He sang these songs well, and added one more to the portfolio at this time, the Broadway show number ‘Till There Was You,’ as covered in a new version by Peggy Lee—or Peggy Leg, as Paul called her. (He was given her record by his cousin Bett Robbins.) John really had a go at Paul for singing this—but didn’t try to stop him doing it, recognizing there was scope for all kinds of music in this group, to please all kinds of audiences … just so long as no one went near jazz” (614-15).

—//—

“LINDY NESS: ‘When Paul sang “Besame Mucho,” John used to stand behind him and make cripple faces. He had to: Paul was asking for it. But John wasn’t particular—he also took the piss out of George and Pete, mostly by imitations of some kind’” (761).

—//—

The tape throws great light on the Nerk Twins’ chemistry. While Paul is singing ‘A Taste of Honey,’ John suddenly shouts ‘SHUT UP TALKING!’ to someone in the audience, interrupting Paul much more than the chatterbox. Paul knows this, and is pitched into laughter. When he sings ‘Till There Was You,’ John—just a beat behind—speaks most of the lines in a persistent piss-taking echo: ‘No, I never heard them at all’ (‘No, he never heard them’). Paul chuckles and plows on; he can’t stop it, and he’s not even necessarily cross about it—he knows it’ll happen because this is John, and John is his fairground hero. It’s part of the double-act: the audience try to watch the singer but can’t tear their eyes off his mate, who’s probably also pulling crips. John couldn’t do this to anyone else without risking a thump, Paul wouldn’t accept it from anyone else; Paul gets to sing his song, John gets to undermine him. It’s just one facet of the complex sibling relationship they’ve always had, one among so many reasons they’re special together” (1178).

[beatleskinkmeme]

Late ‘80s/early ‘90s AU

John is down on his luck, and broke. Yoko took most of the money in their divorce, and what he had left, he lost in a spectacularly bad financial investment of Magic Alex’s musical time-travelling equipment. Having alienated nearly all of his friends, he spends his days hanging out at the bookies he brought for Pete Shotton, occasionally strumming his guitar for punters, but mostly writing angry letters to Melody Maker about Paul. Who, by the way has just completed his most financially successful sell out world tour yet. John writes furious letters that he has become a corporate sell out and sold his soul to THE MAN. One day he issues a challenge to Paul. Can he remember the spirit of rock n’ roll? Never mind about the stadiums, how about joining him on a Nerk Twins reunion tour? Just John and Paul, their guitars, and revisiting the tiny venues they played at in Caversham, the Isle Of Wight and Scotland. (He neglects to mention that the memory of what they used to get up to in their tiny single bed during this time is currently his number one wank bank fantasy). To his utter shock, Paul responds with a letter of his own to Melody Maker, accepting the challenge, and tells John that he’ll be waiting at the gates to Strawberry Field, at noon, with his guitar. Shit, what have I agreed to?! panics John. Too late now, The Nerk Twins are back!

.

[menlove]

i write trivia questions as part of my job and todays is about paul mccartney. i was wondering what your craziest paul mccartney fact is

OH MAN...... that's a good question there's so many wild things that man has said and done I don't even know where to begin

I'm still on the fact that he sent threatening post cards to apple employees in 1968 😭 girl was behaving like an evil victorian lady of the manor like WHAT WAS THAT!

or the fact that they all used to hang out at rory storm's house and his mom would comb paul's leg hair? why???? why

ah or that story of how he'd suck up to gangs in hamburg like an uncomfortable amount with his big ass eyes and just charming the hell out of them letting them do whatever....... inssjdhejsjs okay sure paul

as for any you could use at a job thats not too insane you could always bring up "the nerk twins" which was a like one night only thing him and john did in scotland while visiting paul's family and wearing stupid outfits. OR him making "rupert and the frog song" which I don't think a lot of people know about and it's very cute like he spent so much money on that and it's just this little piece of his childhood and also you can see his love for being a dad......

[mydaroga]

My Trip to England: Beatle Homes

Childhood Homes Tours

No exaggeration--you need to do this if you're in town. Highlight of my life. The tours pick you up and drop you and John's and then Paul's for a tightly scheduled tour. I can't imagine living nearby, even with the provided transport there were people tromping through all day.

John's was first, and as with the Paul house tour, they do a short but quite informed tour and then leave you to roam around for 1-15 minutes on your own. No photos are allowed inside, but we got a couple of me recreating my phone background. The houses are fairly small, though oddly, I think we both felt Paul's had a nicer use of space. But it was surreal to be in those spaces, knowing they'd been there, siting in the "I Saw Her Standing There" corner at Paul's or singing in the vestibule at John's. (Side note: Someone finally noticed my Nerk Twins shirt and got it. It was the guide. He also thought the way I said "rock and roll" was cool.)

Oh and I'm glad I got the souvenir booklets, especially since we couldn't take photos.

But yeah, it was really moving. We've spent so much time thinking, reading, writing about these people in these spaces. And I was there.

[maccamaniac1]

“I used to go round to Aunt Mimi’s house and John would be at the typewriter, which was fairly unusual in Liverpool. None of my mates even knew what a typewriter was. Well they knew what it was but they didn’t have one. Nobody had one.

If John had a chocolate bar, he shared it with me, not some of his chocolate bar, not a square or a quarter of his chocolate bar. He'd give me half.

And that’s why the Beatles started right there. Isn’t that fantastic? It’s the most important story about the Beatles, and it’s in none of the books!"

“John and I grew up like twins although he was a year and a half older than me. We grew up literally in the same bed because when we were on holiday, hitchhiking or whatever, we would share a bed.

Or when we were writing songs as kids he’d be in my bedroom or I’d be in his. Or he’d be in my front parlour or I’d be in his, although his Aunt Mimi sometimes kicked us out into the vestibule!

During the Easter school holidays John and I would hitchhike down from Liverpool to help out in a pub. We generally dossed around for a week and then worked behind a bar. Then Mike (McCartney) would suggest that me and John should play there on a Saturday night. So we'd made our own posters and put them up in the pub: “Saturday Night – Live Appearance – The Nerk Twins.”

- Paul

[inspiteallthedanger]

Hi! Thank you for your "Going Nowhere"! ("thank you, thank you" purrs John's voice in my head). It's so nice to read it, hear it, feel it. It's like your words heal what's broken and during you're reading you know all's exactly how it is in this beautiful tale. ("In another world" sings Paul's voice in my enamored head). May be in another world or in our dream or in parallel reality built in Paul's heart. You give to your (our) heroes chance and they take it. You love them and want them be happy. And they are. Thank you a lot for this! ("Words wouldn't get my feelings through, so I keep talking to you however absurd, however absurd it may seem" two voices grope for harmony in my head - and Nerk Twins start dancing). Love

Oh my goodness! I’m sorry, I think I forgot to publish this and it’s been in my drafts for way too long.

Thank YOU SO MUCH for sending this. It’s so kind of you to take the time to write something so lovely. Writing GN was a real labour of love for me, just wanting to take a sad song and make it a little better. I’m glad you enjoyed it too.

[muzaktomyears]

are you working on any fics right now? i love your writing so much!

unfortunately not - I mean, I am working on fics in my head, always, but I'm still not up to writing, at least for the near future. I'm desperately wanting to, and every day I hope that I will feel up to it. I've recently changed medication so hopefully I'll feel better soon, and with that will come the confidence to write again (fingers crossed). But thank you, anon - I'm so glad that you like my writing! That does help <33

anyway here's some things I've been thinking about:

Allan Williams says in his book that in Hamburg there were aphrodisiacs/Spanish fly for sale... so, John takes something, it actually works, Paul has to help him through it

'67 fic, Cavendish, trippy, John fucking Paul on/over that green velvet sofa

The Nerk Twins play Obertauern

That kinkmeme prompt where it's '71 John fucking '64 Paul

George Martin/Paul

And of course the Leopold and Loeb AU where John and Paul are teenage murderers

[werkthenerk]

Comfy-vember Dad 2: "Holding Hands"

Lil Laura AU info here <-

“She’s still up there?” Logan’s voice is quiet, just loud enough so that Victor can hear it. 

“Yep, all day… don’t see her comin’ down anytime soon, Runt.” 

Logan gives Victor a look, tossing his hands up in frustration as he turns to go back to the cabin. Victor follows, sighing as he runs a hand through his blonde hair. He’d been letting it grow again, especially with winter coming. As they return to the warmth of the cabin, he leans down to kiss Kurt on the forehead as he greets them at the door. 

“She’s not coming in?” “Mm, nope. Logan’s not happy about it, either.” Victor shrugs off his coat, tossing it over the coat tree beside the door. Logan follows suit, lingering by the window as he pulls back the curtain. 

“Laura’ll be fine… she’s obviously a tough kid, to have survived all this time.”

Logan looks to Victor as he speaks, crossing his arms, “...yer gonna sleep up there with her, Bub. We can’t have a six-year-old spend the night in a tree, near winter, in an unfamiliar environment alone.” 

Victor growls, brow furrowing, “Why me?”

Logan points at Victor accusingly, “She’s up there because of you! You’re the one who chased her when she started running from me. If you wouldn’t have chased her-”

Kurt clears his throat to interrupt their argument, eyebrow raised as he looks at his partners. 

“Zhis is not helping! It doesn’t look like ve’ll be able to get Laura inside tonight, so zhat means zhat Victor spends zhe night in the tree vith her, und Logan? You camp out at zhe base of the tree to make sure Victor doesn’t need any help throughout zhe night.”

Both men stare Kurt down, but the Elf stands his ground, smiling pleasantly. 

“I vill get your blankets und bedrolls ready. Dinner is on zhe stove.”

---

Victor grumbles to himself as he scales the tall pine. As he gets within view of Laura, he pauses, choosing a strong branch to occupy for the evening. 

“You’re lucky we like you, Cub. Looks like we’re spendin’ the night out here with you…”

Laura ignores Victor, arms crossed as she leans against the trunk of the tree, gaze turned to the clear night sky. Sighing, Victor hangs his backpack on a nearby branch, pulling out his thermos and a heavy blanket. Wrapping the blanket around his shoulders, he opens thermos, the hearty scent of venison stew filling the air. 

“Smells good; the Elf is a good cook.”

The man chats idly to himself, using his camp spoon to scoop out a mouthful of his dinner. As he raises the utensil to his lips, he looks up as he hears the limb above him shake. Laura stares down at him, gaze rather intense. Victor raises his eyebrow, but continues with his meal. After two mouthfuls, he makes eye contact with Laura again. “Mm… did you want something, Cub?”

Laura’s brow furrows, gaze flicking to his thermos for a moment. Her stomach growls audibly, but she says nothing in response. Sitting on the branch, she crosses her arms and averts her gaze. 

“Suit yourself, it’s good stuff.”

Victor settles back in, taking another mouthful of food. It was a gorgeous night, sky clear and full of stars. However, it was chilly, the late fall air whipping through the branches with a vicious bite. Laura shivers, looking down at Victor as he stays nice and warm under his thick wool blanket. Sighing, she turns her back on him again, leaning against the tree again. 

As the evening passes, Victor watches Laura struggle, huddling in on herself as she attempts to sleep. It’d been like this for the past few months between them, ever since Laura had first arrived in their dimension. She’d been isolating herself, avoidant of as much human contact as she could be. Tired of it, Victor shakes his head, tucking his backpack away. He hefts himself up so that his face is level with the branch above him, reaching out slowly so that he can place a hand on her shoulder.

“C’mon, Cub… come down here with me.”

Laura growls, pulling away sharply from Victor. Sitting up, she hugs the tree and begins to tear, lip wobbling as she sniffs. 

“No, it’s ok Cub, don’t cry. You don’t have to do this anymore, if you don’t want to.”

Laura growls again, but betrays herself as tears begin to roll down her pale cheeks. She sobs audibly, whimpering as Victor reaches up to grab her carefully around the waist. Pulling her down onto the lower branch with him, he leans her against the trunk of the tree and wraps her in the blanket, using the corner to dry her tears. 

“You’re ok… and I’m sorry I chased you earlier,” Victor’s voice is low, but soothing, “don’t cry.”

Offering his hand, Victor is surprised as Laura takes it, her small fingers squeezing his large paw tightly. Wrapping his fingers around her much smaller hand, he smiles a little. 

“Are you hungry? There’s some stew for you.”

Laura nods slowly, using the back of her free hand to wipe tears away from her face. 

“Alright, let me get you some.”

---

As morning dawns, Logan is first to rise. Looking up into the tree, he is surprised to see Victor and Laura on the same branch, the child wrapped in Victor’s wool blanket. Victor snoozes against the trunk of the tree, hand outstretched as Laura holds fast to it, head against his chest as she also sleeps soundly.  Shaking his head, Logan knows that the worst is finally over.

[ceofjohnlennon]

"The admission of Stuart into the band may have seemed a simple solution to an ongoing problem, but it also created a new tension. John didn't have a monopoly on jealousy. Paul could be jealous, too. Once it had been John and Pete Shotton, inseparable friends and partners, and, as Pete had noticed, John always needed a partner. Then Paul had replaced Pete, and Lennon and McCartney had been born. Over months that friendship had grown into something more than the swapping of chords and lyrics, and the high harmony that Paul would sing over John's lower voice. In fact that Easter of 1960 John and Paul would even sing as a duo, when they hitch-hiked to Caversham in the south of England where a friend was running a pub. For a week, John and Paul, who had to sleep together in the same single bed, would entertain the regulars under the name the Nerk Twins. They were best friends and there was a mutual admiration between the two. While John would always recognise Paul's greater gift for melody and musical craft – no matter what he might sometimes say years later – Paul admired John for his unalloyed bravery in speaking his mind, and his ability to summarise a thought in a single, often witty, line. There was more. When John had been living at Mendips, Paul would sometimes go over on his bicycle to find him at a typewriter in his bedroom composing a nonsense piece. Or, perhaps, it might have been a poem that John was writing – something that played with words and images in the style of Dylan Thomas by way of radio star Stanley Unwin, whose corruption of everyday English turned sentences into clever-sounding nonsense. John liked to call that style gobblede gook, a wartime word he'd picked up from the radio, when presenters poked fun at seemingly unintelligible official documents. Always a great talker, John loved words and slogans and enjoyed bending and reshaping their meanings. And Paul, who was studying English Literature at school, and seeing himself as a culture vulture, was impressed. At one point the two even started to write a play together, before quickly deciding that they didn’t know what to write about and that song lyrics were more their metier. So, with a friendship that was now based on more than music, it was inevitable that, with the introduction of Stuart to the group, Paul began to feel like an outsider. It was hardly Stu's fault that John had dragged him into the band. But feeling increasingly cast aside, the perfectionist in Paul couldn't help hearing the wrong notes the new bassist was playing. John would have heard those wrong notes too, but must have consoled himself with the thought that, given time, Stuart would improve. He would, but he would never be good enough. When the occasion demanded, however, John had an infinite capacity to deny the evidence of his own ears."

ㅡ From the book "Being John Lennon" by Ray Connolly.

[crepesuzette2023]

hiiii wanted to say thank you for all the fic recs and ask if you might recommend some longer titles ? i normally go for like 10k words max but I have a long drive coming up and am craving long form ! maybe mclennon primarily but like I'm flexible if it slaps

With extreme pleasure: some of my favorite one-shots are over 10k. And there's been some great ones lately.

But starting with the classics: Now and then (there's a fool such as i) (@stonedlennon). The Nerk Twins travel to Caversham in 1960. Call me by your name vibes, but in mclennon. And Lifting Latches/Writing Postcards (thinkpink20). Early days, clothes swapping, pining.

More recently, I loved Monkey's Paw (@planetaire). Tokyo 1966. The tension! The relief! Paul's ass in the striped suit! Even longer, by the same writer: don't talk, take my hand (1968 angst, with an unexpectedly bright/weird ending!)

tomorrow, I'll miss you (@pauls1967moustache) is another absolute classic. Mclennon 'Before Sunset' AU: John stayed behind in Hamburg...years later, he and Paul meet again.

The two latest ones by @scurator are also great: Where the Spirit Meets the Bone (All of Us Strangers-inspired AU with a hopeful ending) and The Theory and Practice of Gamesmanship (John/Brian/Paul, say no more, *fans self*—just gorgeous, esp. Brian).

There's some great McHarrison in the @beatleskinkmeme Summer of Love collection, which made me think of two longer Paul/George/John faves: No I in Threesome (@with-eyes-closed) and A Wrench in Clocks (honeyheffron).

Stop All the Clocks (@javelinbk). 1967. John and Paul mourn Brian in Scotland, and discover they are in love. Sweet and healing. second that emotion (@backbenttulips): John and Paul on tour in 1964. They explore each other body and soul.

For a lighter turn (had to think about this often lately for some reason): The Jumper by @merseydreams. 70's. Denny Laine wears the sweater John has given to Paul many years ago. John sees a picture of it, and wants it back. The sweater, of course. This is not about Paul! (Also, watch out for Linda in this one! <3)

If you're into omegaverse (actually, even if you're "normally" not): There are two long I Need You Darlin' (@beatlessideblog) extras. Act Naturally (Paul has the ambition to plan and control John's heats; John consents; they fail in the sweetest way possible), and Boxing Day 1958 (their first time trying it 'the other way around').

[burningmatches-liftinglatches]

So @inspiteallthedanger wanted to know my thoughts on the Nerk Twins album John and Paul would've -in all likelihood- released, if John had lived to see the 80s.

I'd obviously be dying to hear it and want it to be a Real Thing *so* bad, both bc -duh- new Lennon-McCartney music (!!!) but also just bc I want them to get their act together and just sit down eyeball-to-eyeball with their guitars again (after they've talked out their Issues bc No, Mr McCartney, songwriting is *not* a replacement for therapy...) I feel like to them writing would just seem as a...natural progression of things once they'd worked on their connection - whether anything would ever come of the material or not.

Musically, I feel it would be quite fascinating bc obviously they spent 10ish years writing without the other so they'd both be bringing different, new things to the table. I wonder where they'd be going with the album...my guess is that the first thing they'd do would be quite stripped down, just them and their guitars doing some old school Rock'n'Roll inspired stuff. That was their *language*, it's what they keep turning to during jam sessions in hope of reconnecting and I honestly find it quite endearing. *If* they were to go on and release other material afterwards, I can see them getting more experimental and I have no idea where they might have gone with it.

On a more personal level, I would be sooo anxious for them if I had to wait for a new album of theirs, simply bc I fear the consequences it might have on their -probably still tender- connection if the album weren't received well. (I feel like there would be a lot of pressure on them from the media and the general public with questions like "have they still got what it takes to be Lennon-McCartney?")

(I really hope they'd just record it quietly without telling a soul -except maybe George Martin, bc let's be real Paul's self-produced stuff isn't necessarily his best- and then they'd just fuck off to Scotland and wait out the worst of it. Maybe they could play some unpromoted pub gigs for the Nerk Twins nostalgia of it all haha)

I think it's fascinating bc most people I've asked are either violently against or in favour of it with nothing in between (my dad wouldn't want it bc "I'm scared it would rip them apart and I couldn't stand the thought of that", my flatmate is in favour of it (for the same reasons as I) and her bf is against it bc he thinks it might taint their earlier collaborations.

Thoughts? :)

[johns-prince]

Paul: John was a beautiful man, John and I slept together, I loved John and I still love John, John was my soulmate. Howard Stern: John was the love of your life. Paul: BUT THE WOMEN-

Paul: John wasn't the love of my life, are you mad? Didn't you see all the women we banged?--

Paul: Recounts how when he first saw the little skiffle group playing at the Fete, it was John who caught his attention and basically "everyone else sort of faded away."

"I came to love that beery old breath."

Paul later divulged that he actually noticed John WAY BEFORE THE FETE, noticed him at the fish and chips shop, they had a brief chat at the newspaper stand Paul worked at briefly, he'd see John on top of the double deckers, would see John on the same bus as he was taking and literally had to steal glances because he was scared John would catch him staring and go knock him one.

Literally defied Jim at every turn when it came to John, would sneak John over when Jim wasn't home or his aunt's weren't over cleaning, started ditching class to hangout with John. Talk about "But daddy I love him" trope with a father who doesn't approve.

Paul chose John over his own fucking father.

Thought John was great for literally offering to share half his chocolate bar.

LITERALLY CONJOINED AT THE HIP WHEN THEY WERE JUST TEENS AND EVERYONE NOTICED.

Literally Paul would let John interrupt his dates, wouldn't get angry when he'd show up despite apparently canceling. Basically the girl Paul was on a date with would become the third wheel and afterwards when she'd complain about Paul letting "that awful guy" come with, Paul would defend John and his inappropriate, biting comments/behavior with, "Yeah but it was funny."

They'd sleep over at each other's houses, and Paul can't ever stop bringing up how he'd sleep with John, *a lot*.

They hitch hiked a lot together, alone.

Nerk twins.

"John's got beautiful hands."

"John was very beautiful."

John's the only one Paul would affectionately fix his tie for.

Paul has no problem with Two of Us and it's depiction of a nostalgic, playful kiss between them in that elevator scene-- but heavily criticized Nowhere Boy because "John never hit me."

Fucking Paris.

"John let me have as many banana milkshakes as I wanted, he must've been really fond of me." Paul you're just fucking with us now.

"I was the only one he chose as his partner, 'nough said."

Paul literally said he could've died happy since he was John's partner and got to work with him.

Paul put Linda's contributions down while gushing over his partnership with John and how he could NEVER have anything like that with anyone else because it's special. Linda's collaberations (and even his collaboration with Michael fucking Jackson) were considered not serious.

Paul's first lsd trip with John and, compared to the one he had with Tara, was PHENOMENAL (Tara claimed Paul just, sat in a corner, flipping through an artbook. Paul just wanted to take a shower after) literally the trip he had with John, the two stared into each other's eyes, repeating "I know." Then he described seeing John as sitting there, like the emperor of the universe. He tried going to lay down to sleep but instead he continued feeling John, like he was controlling everything.

Paul would go with John to meet certain people because he didn't want them upsetting John (not the other way around)

The photo of John sleeping that he took in Paris and has framed somewhere in his house.

Paul leaving the studio, in tears, and crying all the way back to his place, driven by Mal, after John told Paul, seriously, that he wanted a divorce and I don't want to hold your hand anymore.

Paul falling into a great depression when losing The Beatles (John) despite technically having "everything he wanted"-- a wife and kids. Newly wed and supposedly happy... But he was DEPRESSED.

THE SIX FOOT TALL PHOTO OF HIM AND JOHN DURING THE WHITE ALBUM THAT LINDA TOOK AND HE HAD IT IN HIS OFFICE.

"I'm in love with a friend of mine."

Paul was desperate to write with John again-- said by Linda.

"If John was gay then I would've been the first he would have hit on and tried anything with so--"

His entire rivalry with Stu for John's attention.

How about the night they cried, breaking down, drunk, telling each other they loved each other, hugging.

Literally Paul believed that when The Beatles fell, he and John would continue making music. When they got old Paul imagined he'd be making music with John still, for younger folks to play. It was always him and John.

Paul, twice, thought he witnessed John's soul/ghost/presence, once during an interview and when he, Ringo, and George were taking photos together and a white peacock photobombed one.

He always has dreams involving John, and he says they're always good.

After learning about John being killed, he literally locked himself in his studio and listened to Just Like Starting Over on full volume, for hours, weeks on.

He was in denial that John was truly gone, for a month or two. He refused to believe John was dead, wasn't on this plane of existence with him anymore.

He gets his hands on whatever he can of John's or about John.

Linda's friends would talk about how weird and slightly disturbing it was that Paul would talk about John, a lot, and talked about him in the present tense, as if he'd just seen him or talked to him-- not like John was dead.

Here Today.

He still slips and talks about John in the present tense.

He literally said he'll sometimes have "jam sessions" with John when stuck-- he'll imagine John there, and what he might say, the advice, if he'd think the lyrics are shit or good.

His favorite song is the one of his that John praised and was open about liking-- it was John's favorite on that album, so it's Paul's favorite song in general. It's the song Here, There, and Everywhere.

Paul, LITERALLY SAYING HE AND JOHN ARE SOULMATES.

Me:

[star-consultant]

Bright are the stars

You need a Beatle song that perfectly encapsulates your sign? Of course you do. (Spotify playlist) 

Aries—“I Saw Her Standing There” 

One two three FOUR! An eager and intense song for an eager and intense sign. Aries falls hard and fast, with a tendency to rash vows that everyone doubts they mean—but Aries doesn’t doubt. Paul (who later styled himself as a "ram” at a key point in his creative development) makes good on the Cardinal Fire vibe with his exuberant vocals, and John of the Aries rising contributed the street-smart innuendo that utterly makes the song: And you know what I mean. Fittingly, this song kicked off the group’s first album, which itself has plenty of Aries “HELLO I AM HERE TO MAKE A MARK ON YOUR WORLD! (like me plz ok? this is my heart and i am Doing My Best??)” energy. 

Taurus—“All I’ve Got to Do"

A song that takes its sweet time but burrows deeper than the average ear-worm into your consciousness. It’s a patient song that is unassuming but knows exactly what the hell it’s doing. The intensity builds bit by bit, so that you’re unaware when the power of the bridge comes crashing down. Describes the Taurean romantic ideal: lazy, loyal, cozy, constant, tender, and ever-so-true. Also, “All I’ve Got to Do” is featured on the second album, With the Beatles, which has plenty of other Bullish touches, noticeable even with a casual glance at the tracklist: “Don’t Bother Me,” “Not a Second Time,” and “Money (That’s What I Want).” 

Gemini—“She Loves You”

Paul is a Gemini Sun, and throughout his catalogue it shows. But perhaps he never topped the Twinniness of this energetic, optimistic, breathless, gossipy classic. It was composed “eye-to-eye” with John, a truly dual-authored song, and one the rare Beatles numbers where the two lead vocalists double up on every single line, in true (Nerk) Twin fashion. Also the first but definitely not the last of their many “third-person narratives,” Paul’s novelistic instead of confessional slant being distinctly a Gemini thing. The speaker in this one couldn’t be more enthusiastic about this relationship if it were already repaired, and he couldn’t be more enthusiastic about it if it were his. Love is great! People reconciling is great! You should be glad, dumbass! But the real corker? What makes this so Gemini that it hurts? Yoko has confirmed that in the early 70s, during her separation with John, she actually had Paul play agony aunt. Then, during that meetup in L.A. where they were last photographed together, Paul urged John to “apologize to her” and get back together... which he did. That’s right. "She Loves You” is not merely a Gemini’s song: it’s a Gemini’s life. 

Cancer—“Octopus’s Garden”

Ringo the Crab’s musically-complex fantasy about an underwater sanctuary where children are “happy and safe,” he and his lover can be together, and there’s “no one there to tell us what to do.” George (a triple Water sign himself, probably not-so-incidentally) always insisted that his best mate’s song Had Depths, and he himself supplied a lot of them: check out his lead guitar lines. They function as emotional counterpoint. When Ringo’s vocal line is especially wistful, the guitar is bright; when Ringo ends on a confident note, the guitar is quirky, ironic, even stiff-upper-lip pessimistic. Result: a shifting kaleidoscope of FEELS. The Moon approves. 

Leo—“Good Day Sunshine” 

Paul perfectly expresses his own Leo moon with a sublime, vibrant ode to laughter, love, and pride on a cloudless summer day. The bit in the lyrics about she knows she’s looking fine and I’m so proud to know that she is mine? That’s not marring the high tone of the song: that is part of the tone. Hear us roar! And by “roar” I mean "laugh and canoodle, coz Leo is about living the good life, bitches.” 

Virgo—“Please Please Me” 

What’s fair is forkin’ fair, mate! A exemplary blend of Virgo’s Mutable passive-aggressive sensitivity with its Elemental directness... half-critical, half-begging... plus the very sign-typical humblebragging. About their sexual prowess. Damn, Virgo. People forget how Earthy you really are sometimes. But here we are. In very Virgo fashion, instead of ditching the girl he’s decided to harangue her. On a more meta note, the Beatles were still studio virgins when they first began crafting this song, and it took several passes and incorporation of George Martin’s feedback before it became the bursting pop hit as we know it now. There’s that Virgo work ethic paying off.

Libra—“Strawberry Fields Forever”

The imagery of the title suggests an eternal harvest. But the star sign resemblance goes deeper than that: Always, no, sometimes think it’s me, but, you know, I know when it’s a dream. I think, er, no, I mean, er, yes, but it’s all wrong... that is, I think I disagree. Did you just hear your Libra roommate rambling after a joint, or did you listen to verse three of “Strawberry Fields”? Same difference. The song is absolutely lovely, as anything associated with the child of Venus should be, and innovative, as befits a Cardinal sign. Most of all, even in all of Libra Sun John’s weighing and weed-wandering, he knows one thing: he’s got to take someone else along with him. A companion, stat! 

Scorpio—“While My Guitar Gently Weeps”

George of the Scorpio moon and Scorpio ascendant had to really lean into this side of his nature to even get this damn track properly recorded. He resorted to the social power play of inviting Eric frickin’ Clapton into the tense post-India studio just to get Lennon, McCartney, and Martin to give his song proper Beatle recording magic. Which it deserved. The dark drama of the hard-won arrangement is the perfect Scorpio accompaniment to the moody, reflective lyrics about “all the love there that’s sleeping” in this weary world. There’s tender, horrified pity here for those who are stifled into inauthenticity: I don’t know how nobody told you how to unfold your love. I don’t know how someone controlled you; they bought and sold you... Bonus points for the Watery ‘just can’t even’-ness of not being able to so much as pick up a damn broom. 

Sagittarius—“Something” 

You’re asking me, will my love grow? I don’t know, I don’t know! A deeply instinctual lover knows that Cupid has done hit a bullseye. He remains emphatically ambivalent about the future, but he knows what he feels in this moment, and in that moment is romance and wonder that is as deep as the earth is from the heavens. Sags are intense, but of all the Fire signs they are most far-seeing and detached (due to their Mutable quality, which makes them see the world a bit more like an Air sign does). “Something” keeps trying to capture that je-ne-sais-quoi, and despite the speaker’s happiness he can’t help but circle back again and again to take another shot at that the mental target. A philosopher even when in love. Ultimately, however, he doesn’t want to leave her now... which for a restless Sag is already saying a ton.

Capricorn—“Revolution”

John let his unfashionable midheaven Capricorn off the leash with this blunt, pointed savaging of radical and violent revolutions. (Given the tanks on Tiananmen Square and the millions dead on the killing fields of Cambodia, I can’t say that his cautionary note about “destruction” and “minds that hate” was unnecessary.) Few things are more Capricorn than ‘Oh, you want my money? Yeah, first show me that you’ve done your fucking homework, mate.’ Bonus Earth points for the fact that he somehow worked sex—a lot of sex—into this political track. 

Aquarius—“Come Together”

John of the Aquarius moon’s decidedly loony attempt to write a political campaign song in order to stop Reagan. (The result was too weird for Timothy Leary, whose reaction was pretty much ‘wtf? I don’t think even I have enough residual acid in my system for this one... ’) John invokes the ideal of collaboration, but his call to solidarity is built around fantastical lyrics that no one can comprehend: He wear no shoeshine, he got/Toejam football, he got/Monkey finger, he shoot/Coca-Cola, he say/I know you, you know me... Oh, right. The lyrics contain exactly one discernible message: One thing I can tell you is you got to be free. How Aqua. Also in true collaborative Water-Bearer fashion, the arrangement really makes the song (special mention to the tight, tight work of the rhythm section). Bizarre genius that attracts a true team effort—it doesn’t get much more Aquarius than that.

Pisces— “I Want to Tell You”

The wall of sound builds up thickly enough that soon the words seem to be traveling through the sea to reach you: I want to tell you my head is filled with things to say... But when you’re here, all those words, they seem to slip away. A gorgeously, emotionally tongue-tied song... about being tongue-tied. Written by George, a Pisces Sun, this absolute mystery of a lyric is all emotion and no logic. If he seems to act unkind, it’s only him, it’s not his mind. Okay, Fishboy. Good thing the track is compellingly lovely and utterly relatable. Which suits the Pisces life exactly: ‘I don’t know what I mean, but it’s exceedingly beautiful and I want you to share it with you very, very much.’