#Nahyuta is literally my everything rn

[musical-attorney]

Idk how late I am or if I've posted abt this already but-

GOLLY😦😦😦 WHO THE FUCK TOLD THEM ALL TO SERVE CUNT???

[thatstruwu]

so while sitting in front of my laptop at 4am i suddenly remember about decision to leave as im listening to the ost which is phenomenal

which i'll make it about blackmadhi now unfortunately i will make everything about them. also this is more like a word dump bc exams have rotted my brain so my memories are more vague therefore some details may or may not be wrong crossing my fingers rn

also (again) this is not going in ANY directions at all i realize this halfway writing and i'm not fixing it

(skip through this part if you don't want to read about the movie for reasons - contains big ass spoilers)

the detail that enthralled me the most was seo-rae (the chinese female lead) and hae-joon (the male lead) sometimes converse through a translating app, which logically is unneeded as seo-rae is capable of using korean fluently on her own . the thing is, seo-rae chose to use them when she didn't want to communicate them by another language than her mother tongue as it was her rawest form of emotion (in addition to herself being a secretive person already). but again, if translating apps are that good then it doesn't even matter - it is bound to get things wrong. doesn't help that hae-joon himself is terrible with communication in general since he's basically obsessed with solving crimes and his work instead. so their “i love you”s are never “i love you” in words. throw the phone into the ocean, that's what he said to her. he got rid of all the evidence pointing towards her. she helped with his chronic insomnia. she cleaned the blood inside the pool because she knew he hated blood. but an ideal love story is not always a forever-and-ever one and this movie is one of them. hae-joon has a wife, he's a detective fighting for justice, he's in love with rules. seo-rae is a chinese immigrant who is a criminal, and basically... has nowhere to go left. fireworks are magnificent but you can't keep it blooming forever.

(end of spoilers)

so it made me think a bunch of things about blackmadhi in general. basically, if they somehow end up with each other and get their happy ending, going through 18 layers of hell might seem like an easier option. but personally i think it'll be really romantic. in their weird way but still one.

when i read some works i'm really interested in details where authors (shoutout to yall i love you) highlight their vast background differences that can't be changed. sure we all know that one is an ex-convict and one is a regent, but do you guys realize that

it's gonna suck for nahyuta since now he has to act in favour of his beloved home country instead of whatever he want

how likely is simon gonna be accepted as a partner (both legal wise and reputation wise)

eloping is out of the question

and that's only their first problem. i bet at this point if anyone even bothers to read all of this you guys are asking HOW IS THIS RELATED TO THE MOVIE i'm getting there i'm getting there.

one more thing to note is that they're from literally different cultures. simon is british/japanese (personally i go with british bc yk localization thingy) and nahyuta is east asian. there's this quote from the movie past lives (2023) that i really like:

you dream in a language that i can't understand. it's like there's this whole place inside of you where i can't go.

there are memories that you will never be able to fully insert yourself in, basically because it's not where you belong. the culture clash that makes you doubt if you truly belong anywhere at all. when you stay with your partner, one of you have to left their life behind - could be me, could be you. sure, flights are a thing nowadays, but flying means more like you're visiting for a vacation, not living there. you had spent your whole childhood there - it's a big difference.

your friends, your family, your traditions, your home now are halfway around the world. now you have to fit into their family, their traditions - how much of you can you retain? even between languages, you will never have a 1-to-1 exact translation. there are words don't exist in the other language. no matter how accurate and faithful, when you translate, it is obvious that it's not 100% truly what you mean at first anymore.

In Vietnamese, the word for missing someone and remembering them is the same: nhớ. Sometimes, when you ask me over the phone, Có nhớ mẹ không? I flinch, thinking you meant, Do you remember me?

I miss you more than I remember you.

(Ocean Vuong, On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous)

nonetheless, it's still him that you want. if you're willing to hold your hands through everything, you have basically won your bet.

you fall in love with that scowling, glaring prosecutor who's somehow an ex-convict and has a hawk with him. he only wears black and white attire. you could call him a wannabe samurai except that he's very, very, very serious about it - way more than a wannabe should be. he has curly, fluffy black hair with a visible white patch. he studies psychology but has a close connection with the (seemingly unrelated) cosmos space center. he loves his sisters dearly - the older is happily in jail and the unrelated younger is thriving as a defense attorney (who you called a spring chicken at first and he was extremely mad at it). he enjoys the noodles made by his drunkard friend whom you prosecuted once. sometimes, you wonder how lucky you are to be with him, but your little pretzel princess sister always stomps her feet and says that he should be the one feeling like that instead.

your first impression about him isn't the best - horrible, even. so much that you actually don't even like talking about it; you have never seen a living person with such a disastrous attitude. not to mention that he was actively hostile towards your long-time friends, which to you is utterly unacceptable. yet, when everything went down, you slowly realize that maybe you have found a similar deeply troubled soul. athena told you she felt deafening when she tried to hear his emotions. he's pretty, bitchy, preachy, insincere, he hisses and bites anyone trying to go near him. but then you finally got him smiling - which in first glance could feel like his usual fake ones - when he realizes he can trust someone like him. in your opinion, you think his palm tattoo is the most attractive thing about him; maybe even more than his jewel-like eyes. not like you would say it out loud - you're not sappy enough for those wordy expressions.

[carbootsoul]

i was tagged by @katarahairloopies!!! thank u :mwah:

name: leo! @/zeitgeistofnow on ao3, @lazypigeon & @timetohope on here, altho i’m considering uh switching back to not having an art blog :/ i have to think abt it.

fandom(s): ace attorney is my main one rn bc i’m replaying the games with a friend of mine and it’s reminding me how invested i am in the characters!! a lot of my recent fic is atla stuff, altho i’ve been distancing myself from the fandom bc i’ve kinda exhausted my interest in it. finally i’ve been reading a lot of mp100 fic but i don’t think i’ll ever write for it. i just love how dumb all the characters r (with the dubious exception of ritsu)

where you post: ao3!! tbh i always get suprised when people say they write/read fic on any other platform like i haven’t messed around w wattpad or ff.net since middle school... catch up........

most popular oneshot: going just by “one chapter” as the definition of a oneshot, the firestarters, bc it’s fluffy and modern au :) i wouldn’t necessarily call it a oneshot tho bc to me a oneshot shows like, one scene? so like by my definition and your sweet sweet sun makes me crazy (i wanna lay you down and see how you amaze me is my most popular!! (also @ kit u thought UR fic titles were unnecessarily long??? i’ve hit the ao3 LIMIT for characters in titles. it’s about the aesthetic

most popular multichapter fic: sdkjflakjlkj it’s two crowned kings; and one that stood alone, which is a w359 fic i wrote back in late 2017. it’s literally the last fic i haven’t orphaned from when i actually wrote podcast fic (i have 4 other podcast fics but they were all borne out of nostalgia and written after i stopped participating in the fandom). i rewrote all but the last chapter? the last two? about a year ago and i fucked up halfway through so like chapter 6 and 7 are repeated and there’s something missing but i’m too lazy to fix it. no one’s going to read it now anyway :) it WAS the top minlace fic for a little while tho which i take great pride in.

favorite story you’ve written so far: oh that’s a hard question akfsldkfj i honestly like most of them!! and i write a LOT so there’s a lot to choose from. tonight, we are young is def one of my favorites- it was fun to write and i got to explore the ways zuko and yue r similar, which i LOVE to do outside of a zukka/yukka view. you can lean on my arm as you break my heart  is one that i’m really proud of? the whole “cooking as an expression of bato’s love” is definitely some of my favorites. a lot of my ace attorney fics would be categoried as my favorites if i hadn’t improved, too, if that makes sense. like they’re no long my favorites because i can see where my writing is shitty and it bothers me, but if i had written them a month ago they’d be my favorite.

fic you were nervous to post: figures 1-5: killing gods def!! it’s a lot more purple-prose-y than most of my fics and it was also written before i’d kinda like emersed myself in the atla fandom so i didn’t have as good a grasp on the general understanding of zuko’s character as i do now. tbh it’s one i’m rly happy w tho!! i have a few people leave really nice comments on it and rereading them makes me really happy. also it was the start of me hating the position of fire lord and being at least passively anti-it in my fics.

how you choose your titles: they’re almost all song lyrics!! only 14 of my 50 words AREN’T song lyrics and about half of those are from before i started writing ace attorney fic lol. sometimes i go into a fic with a song in mind for the vibes and then i usually go with lyrics from that (like in ‘cuz we’re the greatest /they’ll hang us in the louvre), but otherwise i usually pick an artist i’ve been listening to and go through their songs until i find a lyric that fits. sometimes the lyric doesn’t even really fit the fic and i just chose it at random or because i searching up the word “fly” in my spotify library or whatever. honestly i like coming up with titles? i know a lot of fic writers hate it but being able to just use song lyrics is v soothing for me and while i know that most people won’t search out a song just bc it’s a fic title like.. seeing that the title of a fic is a hozier lyric does affect how i read it and i kinda like that.

do you outline? i outline my long form/multichaptered fics with varying strictness. usually anything over ~8k will have some kind of outline. sometimes i go into it with every single scene planned out, sometimes it’s just notes on the side of the google doc that say “it's about MORE family. about how it's not betraying your existing family to find more” and “scenes i want to include: [...]” and “vampires... ngl kinda hot.” i’m trying to outline super strictly less bc i’ve found it’s less fun? but i do try to keep a plot arc in mind. since most of my fics are more character-driven than plot-driven, that usually just means keeping track of what character development i want to happen or what is motiviating the characters. 

complete: um everything posted on ao3 i guess. also the MULTITUDE of orphaned fics out there asksfjldkj i always click ‘leave my pseud on’ so if u look up my username you see all of my fics and then a. lot of other ones.

in progress: - a fic titled ‘dad phoenix’ that is actually just a no DL-6 au with defense attorney miles edgeworth and single dad bartender phoenix where neither of them want to date for A While but phoenix gets wrapped up in one of miles’s cases. it’s about family. it’s about writing teenagers. it’s about the background franmaya which is ALWAYS what i’m here for in wrightworth fics - a franmaya werewolf/vampire au because i’m ~gay~ and love rivals to lovers and also franziska and maya both being angry their older brothers r dating each other. - my secret santa fic!! which i can’t talk about much but it does feature toph and zuko and also piandao and jeong jeong???? idk where they came from but they are Part Of The Fic Now also i forgot iroh existed for half the fic and wrote piandao as zuko’s father figure and now i’m in too deep. - a 5+1 bakoda fic (maybe a bato/hakoda/kay fic??? i need to decide. that’s part of why this fic is still incomplete bc i can’t decide which relationship dynamic i prefer) that’s 5 times bato said he loves hakoda and one time hakoda said it back. possibly i have already written him saying i love u back and i need to change the title a little. - retail au klapollo where klavier works at an overpriced boutique and apollo comes in to buy earrings for nahyuta’s birthday. klavier gives him a punch card (one that the store doesn’t actually offer anymore as a bid to get apollo to come back) and all of apollo’s family come in to use the punch card and also give klavier variations on the shovel talk/find out if he’s actually into apollo. - a LOT of atla fics that i don’t think i’ll ever finish :(

coming soon/not yet started:  - i want to write some blackmadhi bc they’re.. cute..... and it’s a good excuse to also write athena and i love her - my stuff for yueki week!!! i have NOT prepped enough but hopefully i’ll remember in time! i wrote the prompts in a way that kinda set up stuff i’ve already wanted to write (don’t look at me lol) so hopefully i’ll get at least two or three fics finished in time. - i want to rewrite the wrightworth fic i have about them not getting married bc it was interesting and i like what i wrote about but i think i could have written it better and made it more interesting. rewriting fics is hard tho bc i’m never sure if it makes sense to just edit in the new work or to repost it? and then if u repost it do u delete the old one? conflicting so i might just not

do you accept prompts? totally!!! a disclaimer tho i’m not super into writing atla stuff anymore (most of the atla stuff i’m still writing is  something i made a commitment to finish) so if your prompt is an atla one i probably won’t do it :/ basically anything else is fair game tho!! podcasts/aa/sa/uh i don’t remember anything else but like if you search a fandom on my blog and come up with more than two posts about it chances r i’d be happy to write fic for it!

upcoming work that you’re most excited about: oh huh i mean probably the no dl-6 au!!! it’s the longest ace attorney fic i’ve written already and since it’s wrightworth it’ll get more attention than any franmaya fic i write. my standards r so high now tho after getting to much feedback from atla fans... love u all... obviously i have no choice but to pressure my atla mutuals into playing ace attorney. pls ask abt it bc i WIll Give You A Sales Pitch about why you’d like it in relation to atla

tagging: i’m not rly tagging anyone!!! @deadflora if you still consider urself a fic writer also consider urself tagged! also any of my other mutuals who write fic i just can’t think of anyone rn