#NYCROLLASInTreatment

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#SchoolDaze

#StraightOutta1984

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It one thing to share thoughts that are guaranteed to set off an alarm. It's another to go beyond the specifics of the situation at hand and zero in on the root cause. Watching YouTube videos on agoraphobia resulted in flashbacks to a period that is harder for me to discuss than a girl getting in my head and exposing me. #OutOfTheBlueIntoTheBlack actually starts with a similar theme. The biggest difference is prison rules tend not to apply when you're on holiday.

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Mentalcel

Someone whose inceldom (involuntary celibacy) derives from having some psychological problem, hence hindering their conversational skills with prospective romantic partners. These psychological problems can range from anxiety, depression autism, or anything else related to the mind.

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Incel

aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude. incels have little to no self awareness; even when they see other "ugly" men with girlfriends, they consider these men to be tricksters who have somehow beat the system and can get women despite being cursed with unattractiveness (in other words, theyre respectful to women and women are attracted to their personalities, but incels cant comprehend such a phenomenon). they believe that women owe them sex, and many of the more extreme incels like to spend time in incel communities on the internet coming up with ways to make women have sex with them (often involving genocide of people of color, genocide of "Chads" (men who have sex), taking rights away from women, raping them, having sex with women's dead bodies, and other horrid, disgusting things. they cant understand that that is PRECISELY why women want nothing to do with them).

I'm pretty sure Ryan is an incel. Yesterday he made a facebook post about how all women are shallow and exist to torture men by "denying" them sex, as if sex is something people "deserve", and not a privilege given by potential sexual partners that should be respected.

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P**** Repellant

A guy whose ridiculous way of carryinghimself insures that no women will associatewith him or his friends.

e.g. Dude, why the hell did you tell Gary to meet us here? That guy is walking pussy repellant! I hope you didn't expect to talk to any chicks with him hanging around...

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Praying The Straight Away

#WakingUpInMelbourne was a turning point that motivated me to clean up my act. There were a handful of times where marijuana led me to fall me back into old habits. Even in those instances I tried to steer clear of anything that fell into the vanilla category. If the past is the best predictor of the future, it would only be a matter of time before I found myself in a #MKNaomi scenario.

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Its a bitch to put on a pokerface when I find myself in a manic depressive hole.

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Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed

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To hear that tears me up inside

And to see you cuts me like a knife

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"Don't get lost in the darkness. You can't give them want they want."

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#OutOfTheBlueIntoTheBlack

#StraightOutta1984

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After attending schools that were predominately white and Asian (District 26 Queens) it made sense to attend an historically black college.

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#MKNaomi put her hand up and turned her back towards me before I even finished speaking. I had every reason to believe there would be nothing more to say. The only thing that came to mind was writing down exactly what she said. Underneath it I wrote "Into Darkness". There were many themes that were resurrected from #TheFinalChapter of #TheChrisWilsonProject33. What went down in #CollegePoint fueled a lot of hatred. If I'm watching music videos like The Number of the Beast by Iron Maiden, it's a sign that I'm heading too far into the darkness. Even Naomi changed her tune after using her powers of insight once again to sense the course I was heading down.

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I can't explore the subject of finding a woman with poor judgement of character without quoting an e-mail from a former professor. Her advise was something along the lines of finding a woman who was worthy. Even though I'm going back to 2005, this is still a sensitive issue. In fact last spring I parted ways with a psychologist for displaying a lack of sensitivity after I opened up to her about this. You don't follow a moment of vulnerability with "Do you need help getting to the skatepark?".

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Mentalceldom

The Donnelly Study found that participants reported depression, low self-esteem, poor body image and emotional paralysis at the thought of initiating a relationship.

Involuntary celibacy has been attributed to psychological factors, such as social awkwardness, a lack of social skills, lack of confidence or flirting skills, trust issues, addiction, shyness, recreational sex invoking feelings of guilt, fears of unreciprocation of romantic overtures or apathy or an inability to decipher social cues.

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Gynophobia

(or gynephobia) is an abnormal fear of women, a type of specific social phobia. In the past, the Latin term horror feminae was used.