#NOT ME GOING OFF MY ANTIDEPRESSANTS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PANDEMIC OOP

[steponmepinkjun]

your mistake was expecting this fixation to "die out." the trap with kpop is that theyre Constantly Releasing More Content so you're stuck here till they disband, bro. kpops been my longest lasting hyperfixation and it only dimmed down (not even died out) when i doubled my dosage of antidepressants during a mass pandemic and had to violently project onto visual novels so i could Feel Something. as soon as i weaned myself off my meds the kpop brainrot came back Full Force. its been years. ive fully accepted that im never escaping this hell and so should you -felix bi anon

Look I went into this pandemic telling my bestie on the daily "ma'am I am sorry but I am not watching anime and I am not getting into kpop, anything that is even vaguely reminiscent of shit I wouldve gotten beat up for in high school is very much a firm NO from me, also my two fav artists of all time are Lil Kim and Lana Del Rey, I don't think kpop is gonna be my speed at all, it's just not gonna vibe w me okay. And also my Type™ is very much rock dudes who are skinny and pale like they're dying with hella tattoos and an attitude problem, I'm tryna meet a man at the hardcore show, them kpop boys are not the vibe" (OOP it was the western beauty standard brain rot in FULL force bestie 🙊) so like, the fact that I even started to stan skz was 10000% against my will 😂 the part of me that once wanted to work in marketing is absolutely fascinated by the structure of the kpop industry and how insanely effective it is, but I thought I was ABOVE THAT lmfaooooo and NOW LOOK AT HA. CRYING OVER SOME SHORT ASS LIL AUSSIE BOY SINGIN SONGS WHERE I ONLY KNOW ONE OUT OF EVERY 75 WORDS. I WAS TRICKED, I WAS BAMBOOZLED, I WAS HOODWINKED!!!!!!! Also every fuckin time I see some lil kpop boy struttin around bein hella goals I'm like "lemme check somethin real quick, lemme cover my bases," cause I am NOT tryna get bamboozled into stanning another bunch of FETUSES, LITERAL ZYGOTES, and every damn time Google is like "yeh bestie they're all of 21, you're about to go full cougar mode, pump the breaks, back it up bestie, exit the premesis, back away slowly" and so I do cause like yall I aint even old, I'm only 27, but that is On Deaths Door in internet land and I'm not tryna get cancelled, so I physically cannot allow myself to stan any other group lmfao 😂 I have made my peace with skz sneaking into my fuckin heart but NEVER AGAIN. ACTIVATING AVOIDANT ATTACHMENT STYLE!!!!!!! I have never been cool a single day in my damn life and I do NOT need to add the stigma of someone I work with catching me doing the full Back Door choreo in my car before I clock in 😂 my high school trauma will not allow it 😂 ain't no room for it, I'm baggin' and taggin' any other groups content and yeeting it 100 miles away from me, my ego can't take it, she's fragile, she can't take criticism, lemme go back to flying completely under the radar with my basic ass self, that's all I ask 😂 I don't need to go back to work and have a FULL mental breakdown on the sales floor because Chan posted a selfie, I don't need to have to try to explain to my coworkers that I need ten minutes to chain smoke and cry over some boy reading comments on a live chat 😂 LET ME OUT OF THIS FIXATION, BRAIN, PLEASE, I AM EXPOSING MYSELF AND SNATCHING MY OWN WIG ON THE DAILY 😂😂😂😂😂