#My love won’t let you down
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atsumu’s pr team the type to put him into every possible thing—sports ads, energy drink endorsements, hair care commercials, tiktok trends, the whole thing.
at some point the miya twins try to start a podcast but it’s 30 minutes of them bickering, so it ends after 5 episodes. a youtube channel doesn’t do any better.
but it’s in his mid-late twenties that a movie is pitched to him and his pr team is all over it, marketing him as the up-and-coming romcom heartthrob of the next decade.
atsumu has never acted a day in his life, and sure, he’s hot, has a charmer of a smile and the physique of a god. but the moment he speaks, all of that gets thrown out the window immediately.
#my love language for atsumu is bullying him lovingly 😔#they book him the role bc sales think he has enough pull to break the box office 🥲#(he does) (but osamu never lets him live it down)#when he has to do a kissing scene with the opposite lead his lips won’t stop quivering#and they have to do 10 takes to get the shot right LMAO#you are his trusty assistant through all this#and you’re hiding your laugh behind your hand as he fumbles his lines for the nth time#bc he’s practiced this with you TWENTY times 🥲#atsumu doesn’t believe for a second that he’s cut out for this but his pr manager is insistent#and has somehow managed to convince him that he’s at the peak of his youth AND his career—that he should grab every opportunity ahead of hi#thank GOD he just has you by his side through all of it#shotorus.bubble#atsumu
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“they had something” and it’s gihun and frontman ?? im sick
#THEY HAD WHAT? CUS ITS CERTAINLY NOT ENEMIES TO LOVERS#people would ship two brain - eating amoebaes if they were somehow male#and that’s exactly what’s in their fucking heads. it’s the same way fyozai makes no sense to me#a ship doesn’t need to be good for it to work and characters esp ENEMIES should always have some kind of chemistry and understanding of#each other. because that’s what makes it good WITHOUT#ROMANCE. but what i’m tired of it opening any platform and seeing every male relationship (non romantic meaning) boiled down#old man yaoi ….. you’re sick. you’re actually sick like ?!!!!:£:73!:/&/83&&:£: HELLOOOOOOO#HELLOOOOOOOOO#idc it doesn’t make sense to me like call me a hater but im like ??? y’all could have shipped him with jungbae. but you won’t bcs he’s not#attractive to you …. like i’ll say it once and shout it again im sick#it’s the same fucking thing with alien stage man like it was created by two lesbians and has to women front and centre to kick it all off#and the main character is a woman and yet its a BL? KYS#i’m tired. like i don’t hate shipping but im tired of predicting that people will yaoi-ify anything#two ants are looking at each other rn over a crumb of bread and someone would say they’re star crossed#that ant will give up the crumb for his love bcs he needs it more or some shit#yawn. anyway rant over but tldr shit makes no sense to me anymore and it i see one more gihun and frontman edit im propelling myself#into traffic. in front of the person who made it#like some people just can’t let things be non romantic and it’s ??????? sometimes it’s better when it’s not#like not romantic i mean. sometimes things are better when they aren’t trying to fuck each other#the amount of typos can u tell im irritated HDJSJSJSJS#i try not to let this shit bother me but atp it’s all i see. i don’t want jayvik or gihunfrontman smut on my timelines grandpa im tired
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Hey. Sorry about the inactivity, but pretty sure no one cared that much anyways lol. Been a looooong time since I kept that distant from Tumblr…at least now I know I’m able to survive without checking posts every day/being chronically online! I’ve got an intense love-hate relationship with this lifestyle I’ve dug myself into. Think I’m getting a little bit better with the balance even if school isn’t really giving me an option. Got a load of work I need to keep catching up on if I don’t want to disappoint my professors. We’ll survive somehow. Here take a quick batch of Puzzle doodles k bye
#the hell am I so anxious about? maybe it’s just overstimulation stuff#hoping it’ll die down because I can’t keep enjoying myself when I’m like this#seriously is starting to mess with my flight responses over the tiniest things#like yea obviously I needed to stay logged out of Tumblr so I would focus more on schoolwork#but uhhhh gonna be transparent and say a huge part of it is the jolts of anxiety :(#like even the thought of logging back here has caused me to feel like sweating#my brain kept saying ‘no I don’t want to I can’t do that’ even when I felt bad for missing out on others posts#like I want to be here so I can support my mutuals dammit!!!#I’m a mess. I’m such a broken mess oh great lovely spectacular#maybe the culminating stress of final exam deadlines is worsening stuff as well#I can’t tell you why I’m like this I just am 🙃#anyways thinking I’ll start adapting to the distance. Sorry but being a shut-in is more appealing right now#I just need time to be with myself and not be so invested in the lives of others#anyways what’s something mildly positive I can wrap this up with so I don’t seem pathetic….#ah yes the final Puzzle sketch here was drawn today before a class period#one of my fellow classmates noticed and audibly asked me ‘is that Mr. Puzzles?’#IT TOOK EVERTHING IN MY WILLPOWER TO NOT LET OUT A GIDDY SHRIEK#Felt like my eyes bulged and I jolted in enthusiasm jskjsksp spontaneous happiness?? actally experiencing the feeling of fitting in??#anyways I responded with a very normal ‘WAIT YOU KNOW ABOUT HIM???’ while trying to suppress grinning or going ‘teehee’#anyways now it’s my personal mission to keep initiating conversations with her because AUUUUUGH SHE KNOWS WHO HE IS I’M LOSING IT#proceeded to talk about Murder Drones & TADC like holy SHIT I didn’t think I would ever find animation peeps in my psychology class auuu 😭💜#it’s a MIRACLE man this may be a sign that college won’t be isolating anymore yaaaaayyy#PUZZLE IS SINGLE HANDILY HELPING ME TALK TO PEOPLE BOTH ONLINE AND IRL THIS IS WILD#all hail the best comfort character seriously holy shit—like imagine she never noticed me drawing Puzzles!! I’D STILL BE LONELY AS HELL#okay sorry I’ll stop typing like a teenager and go back to pretending to be well-versed in speech & conducting myself ‘normally’ :3#doodles#sketches#hplonesome art#not tagging with Puzzles because hahaaaaa don’t look at me
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Feels great to be an Eloise & Cressida truther and defender since DAY 1 when the trailer and stills dropped. The way they helped each other grow as people, Cressida stopping her gossiping and Eloise basically being MORE mindful of others and less self focused and tried helping Cressida. I also love the fact that even when she was friends with Cressida, she was always trying to be mindful of Penelope (minus that stint where she told everyone that Colin was helping Penelope find a suitor, she apologised and was forgiven).
Eloise definitely had some character growth in the friendship department since her fight with Penelope, in the essence of paying closer attention to her friends (mostly Cressida’s current troubles).
I feel like Eloise really took in what Penelope and her were fighting about last season but since she was and definitely is still upset of what Penelope wrote in Lady Whistledown (for good reason on eloise but an understandable reason for why Penelope did what she did) Eloise definitely took the criticism to heart and is trying to be better and managed to make a genuine friendship with Cressida.
#bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#cressida cowper#penelope featherington#spoilers#they’ll never make me hate you Eloise Bridgerton#I hope this makes sense I hope it doesn’t sound like I’m rambling lmaoo#I love all three of them so if anyone decides to hate ur unwelcome here#also I’m so down to ship Cressida x Eloise ik we won’t get it but let a girl dream in my delusion LMAO#wlw#love them both platonically too - Cressida definitely needed a genuine female friendship
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i’ll watch it but i won’t fucking like it
#nicholas galitzine#ur on thin ice baby no matter how much i love you#tzp won’t let me down this way mark my fuckin words
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a strange trend in my favorite characters I realize is that I tend to heavily gravitate toward somewhat obscure, antagonistic forces
#shoutout to the multiple months when I was young when I was obsessed with flatwoman#‘who the fuck is flatwoman’ heh. well. you ever watch the pbs kids show peg + cat?#she appeared in like two episodes and let’s just say. I would’ve died for her as a kid#and yup ok you guessed it this trend continued with my boy pumpkin daddy#what thehell is wrong with that guy and more important question why is he my absolute favorite character of all time#I’m not even talking strictly about PDBC here alright? in that I have full control over him#in ROOTS? oh boy unstoppable force of nature someone Actually euthanize him or something he’s going to commit heinous crimes if left alone#he’s So bizarre mind if I just talk about that before going back to sleep? his morals are all over the place#‘this poor abandoned child. her mother should be ashamed of doing this to her. anyway let’s kidnap her for money’#and then he fucking pretends that he didn’t remember that happening#not that it DIDNT happen but that he just doesn’t remember it??.okay go off king??#at this point I don’t even know if he was lying he might just have Alzheimer’s or something he’s gettin kinda old#also Alzheimer’s is the worst word ever I have to look it up to spell it every time ffs so annoying#also worth mentioning that he almost got himself killed in a pursuit of someone’s money#and then not even a YEAR later he was back at it again trying to scam the SAME people lol GIVE IT A REST#I didn’t type lol this is travesty istg I didn’t type lol there there’s a lol ghost on the loose#he needs to be put down or something#and why the hell is he actually one of the nicest parents like huh?..?man what??#yeah this is my little science experiment I made solely for money. i love her she’s beautiful she’s awesome#my brother in Christ pick a side are you horrible or not#ok also wait that reminds me. it was unintentionally implied that he wasn’t evil once#I won’t go into it for the sake of time but. raises eyebrow. what the hell do you mean#at least I think it was unintentional. it’s still weird to me and I never bothered asking#anyway I should probably go back to sleep I have n appointment in like. two hours. sigh#yayyyy I love characters who suck!!! ��🥰🥰 pop off you asshole king and or queen
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corporate doesn’t want me to share the thoughts he’s provoking in me today
#THEY WON’T STOP ME I WILL SHARE ANYWAY#this is maximus settling down for the night and preparing to absolutely ***** my ****** and *** my *****#all my thoughts are redacted for general maximus#he inspires such longing such passion such devotion#I LOVE HIM#the armor only adds to the appeal#he may be covered from the neck down by by gum you can’t hide a man who’s built like a PILLAR#the way i need him to pull me behind that curtain and make me his#y’all. the thirst is real today#i am BEGGING him to marry me and let me bear his children#make me a traditional housewife i don’t even care anymore#save me big strong noble kind-hearted warrior save me#he’s so intensely precious and i want to both hug him and bang him senseless#we were made to be together i know it#one day#one day my delusions will become reality#gladiator#maximus#maximus decimus meridius#gladiator 2000#russell crowe#low quality screencaps of a high quality man
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is episode 8 the domitian arc ? more on this and EVEN MORE narratives i’ve been ignoring that the show said “actually,,,” about in 5
#hermes staying domitian’s hand… hermes’ face a flash of discomfort when he was torturing tenax… hmm. character growth.#WHAT WAS THAT HERMES. WHAT WAS THAT LOOK. NO GIRL GET BACK HERE I CANNOT ALSO DO THIS NARRATIVE OF YOU NO LONGER ABLE TO PULL HIM BACK FROM#THE BRINK OF HIS CRUELTY WATCHING HIM CHANGE AND SEEKING OUT SOMEONE ELSE IN HIS NEED AND FEAR AND ANGST. NO BABY GIRLLLL#I DON’T WANT TO WRITE A HERMES POINT OF VIEWWWW OF THE SIX YEARS HE SPENT WATCHING DOMITIAN BLOOMMMM INTO HIS POWER AND CORRUPTTTT because.#correct me if i’m wrong but in that very first scene that was a young hermes in the white right he watched domitian give his speech and saw#his father to truly see him the whole time as hermes has seen his brilliance.#NO I ALSO SAW THAT GUARD’S HEAD FOLLOW HERMES oh i hate it here. you know what i also hate? i need domitian to be successful for tenax#but also i do kinda like titus… NOOOOOO NO KILLING TITUS DOMITIAN I JUST SAID I LIKED HIM!!!! DOMITIAN!!!#oh. ohhhh no. OH NOOOO okay listen we can redeem this. we can have the whole turning point of the narrative be domitian’s mercy of hermes#the ultimate staying of his hand. proving he’s not entirely gone that hermes & his love still means something. do i think this will happen#no absolutely not. before he can kill his brother domitian has to kill the only other living person he loves perhaps more than titus if he#could ever realize it. (a brief interlude to yell LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO HI IRIS) domitian… please spare him… OH WAIT HELLO THE BLOOD!!#ALSO a brief interlude to say i knew it was coming but ELIA’S SPEECH ABOUT LOVING INCITATUS??? I WAS ON THIS INCITATUS SHIT WITH THE LITTLE#NOD THEY HAD WHERE SCORPUS CALLED HIM TO BEAT XENON OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!!! elia’s going to crush him. incitatus won’t listen.#scorpus is going to die twice once when they call elia’s name instead of his and then the second time when the scorpion bites him again#(he kills himself and tenax finds him. sorry to give everyone absolutely maximum damage here but uh. that’s how i can see it going down)#or alternatively worse: after killing titus who at times he loves and hates in equal measure (if y’all don’t think I have some UNHINGED#brothers quotes. we’ll keep mum here about why but suffice to say it is. relevant to other fandoms. and thus i have a Collection) the last#thing domitian has to do is kill hermes. and this one is both out of betrayal but also love because I think somewhere in here titus’ queen#berenice plays a role because domitian’s hatred of the jews probably comes to play a role and I think titus would show up and protect her#like Domitian engineers some kind of a situation where in theory titus could escape alive or beat him but he can’t do that & save berenice#and so of course he saved berenice. or she dies in his arms and he goes mad with grief and any way you put it berenice is the trap & titus#happily crawls into the lion’s mouth to save her for love of her etc and domitian sees him die for it. he gives titus every chance to come#back to him to work with him to be what he wants him to be and he always chooses himself he chooses love and domitian can’t understand even#when it makes him weak. and then he sees hermes dirty and emaciated and still terribly terribly beautiful and feels such a pang of longing#and love that he decides he has to die because he (domitian) cannot be weak. he cannot have any of it. also giving domitian worse paranoia#than he already has because if you kill your brother the one person who should always love you—support you—who can build me a new brother—#you’ve gotta generate some MAJOR issues. namely trust issues. and if he kills hermes they’ll be even worse. so like ideally To Me domitian#wouldn’t kill him but i do very much see the symbolism of cutting off his last earthly tie & desire to ascend to the divine imperial throne#those about to die
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THE BEST OF PRIORITY: THE CITADEL (PART 2)
Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Lt. James Vega, EDI, and Maj. Kaidan Alenko With: Councilor Donnel Udina, Councilor Tevos, Councilor Laiel Sparatus, Cmdr. Armando-Owen Bailey, and Kai Leng And a Special Guest Appearance by: The Illusive Man But sometimes the way a thing goes down does matter, Sophie. Later- when you have to live with yourself. Knowing that you acted with integrity- then it matters. Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)
#mira makes gifs ✨#sophie shepard#james vega#EDI#kaidan alenko#shenko#fshenko#mass effect#mass effect 3#me3#mass effect legendary edition#dailygaming#james’s panicked face as the shuttle goes down you will always be famous to me bc you are so relatable#at this point i just know the normandy crew is not letting shep EDI or james near anything mechanical anymore#(something mechanical explodes around them on literally every mission at this point- cars.. bombs.. ships.. you name it!) :)#the way i didn’t even realize EDI and kaidan were wearing matching armor on this mission until i got to the elevator and i- ��� (blue crew!!)#but like- the way when soph gets off the elevator and kaidan has the gun drawn and she tells them to lower their weapons??#and EDI and james don’t even hesitate? THOSE ARE MY BABIES!!! THATS MY SQUAD RIGHT THERE!! THE LEVEL OF TRUST BETWEEN THESE THREE!! 🥹🥹🥹#and they don't raise their weapons again?? not until soph raises hers?? like it's the level of trust between her and them for me 🥹#i will say i talk a lot about how me3 shenko canon doesn’t really follow my own shenko canon (and my canon coup is MUCH DIFFERENT)#but something i noticed about the coup that i really liked? when kaidan has his gun drawn on shep you can see his hands shaking a little#it’s SO SUBTLE (and it’s easier to notice when you’ve got the video slowed down) but like?? the way his hands aren’t steady??#when he has the gun drawn on someone he loves?? i cried a bit making that gif ngl 🥺#the soft little ‘you won’t’ from shep after ‘i better not regret this’ makes me 🥺 every time.#there’s a canon reason soph doesn’t take the renegade interrupt but part of it is bc i like kaidan’s convo on the docks better :)#speaking of the docks the intro to the convo is a bit nonchalant but i like kaidan’s speech about integrity/living with your decisions#and the conversation between him/shep about what happened on the landing pad (though i wish it was a tiny bit longer!!)#there’s no ‘i feel like you would have taken me out’ line in the soph™️ canon but we supplemented it with some rewriting bc loose canon™️#(she never draws a gun on the landing pad either but that’s a story for the actual canon 🙃)#and yes i gif’ed the ass shot. there’s only one valid ass shot in the series and it’s this one! and you can quote me on that! ✨
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keep thinking abt hoshina and mina GOD.. (spoilers for manga and kn8 bside)
given what hoshina said about his previous division treating him like a burden/parasite just because he can’t handle firearms and specializes in his swords… how tiring must it have been to have to work with those people each mission despite having a common goal?
and how tiring must it have been to be constantly told off by his own father for wanting to continue his family’s tradition, or to be told to give up on being part of the jakdf by his own teacher -
before mina, a high ranking commander personally reached out to him, to recruit him into her team?
the fact that she didn’t see him during joint trainings and think: why bother with that? why bother with blades when bigger kaiju will appear? when she personally deals with bigger kaiju herself.
but she instead saw him and thought: he can help me, he can cover my weaknesses (mina not being able to handle a vegetable peeler is hilarious) and he’s someone i can trust
she sees potential in him, she sees how he can excel within her division, she saw hoshina and as captain - has probably heard everyone talk shit about him but she was still certain that he’d be one of her division’s greatest asset
(and even when platoon leader ebina refused to let hoshina help out, mina stood firm on her decision and her claim that hoshina would be useful. when she asked him if he could take down the big kaiju, and he could only promise saving the child within it - she believed him, took his word for it and waited until he carried out his promise.)
and now hoshina is the vice captain, putting faith in a new recruit whom most people wouldn’t have believed in… full fucking cycle..
tldr: it makes me rly fucking emotional to think about how hoshina was given a reason to continue improving with his swords after being told to give up all this time… and how mina had never once thought his abilities were useless 👍
also makes me crazy how protective he is of his position as vice captain, as the person who stands by captain ashiro’s side…
#egg boils#im crazyyyyyy#soshimina#thank you kn8 bside hoshina arc . II CANTTTTT#when we get to the next two episodes i will be seated and crying#the video rings in my head like 20 times i say “i won’t let you have my position next to captain ashiro okay do u want me to kms…?#long post#sorry.#/9446#kaiju no.8#i need to look at my brain rot#sorry#every time i post it’s just like NURSE they’re saying the same thing again yes im saying this for the third time but i truly adore the bond#and mutual respect and her faith in him okay. hoshina makes me sad.#sometimes u just need the one (1) person to believe in u AND vouch for u no matter who decides to say shit…#the way he looked at her the two times she asked#him to join her division ohhhhh im crazy . love at first sight babes#hoshimina#<- idk which tag to use bc hsmn makes the most sense given we hear hoshina be called that#but .#gweh#yeah hoshimina probably makes most sense i’ll change my tags or just add what i deleted#also ☝️ they’re js really fucking goofy together#i think it’d take a few years before mina warms up to him but u can see how close they are (physical touch - bonking him#leaning close to read smth she’s showing him#taking a pic of him feeling down#etc etc please give me more interactions yall im starving#also btw on the flip side i think it’s a bit. You Know to have mina openly ask or recruit a new member who specifically for the sake of#Helping Her#for the sake of having someone she can rely on . like she relies on the entire division obviously but . BUT!!!!! listen listen [waves hands
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not an f&b aegon ii fan, not a hotd aegon ii fan, but a secret third thing (a fan of the aegon ii that only exists in my mind)
#extreme mommy issues his father figure is his grandfather & a dude who literally cannot stop committing hate crimes deeply upset that he#could have been his older sister’s male wife but his mom said no and now he has to be king#wants to be a good husband to helaena but resents how gentle she is and dependent on his protection wears his hair short bc he resents his#father’s obsession with valyria when westeros is here now and needs him to do more than just acclaim rhaenyra decades ago and aegon#his true love is his dragon and he was never going to live long after sunfyre. the son that actually DID come with fire and blood to save#his mother but it wasn’t enough never enough because he’s the oldest son but he’s also only second born and what is a second born son than#girlson who is functionally useless as anything more than a pawn to his family.#dying miserable and alone without even his mother’s love bc he came for her too late but he CAME FOR HER!!! HE SAVED HER. too bad.#she doesn’t care anymore bc everyone she really loved is dead. dying a pawn and yet the powerful man in westeros.#letting the narrative consume him alive after sunfyre is injured and finds him on dragonstone. he knows he’s doomed when he goes up against#baela. he does it because what else do you do. you’ve gone too far. killed too many. you killed your sister’s children and she killed yours#in return and now you can’t go back. no choice but mutually assured destruction with the only woman who ever saw how dangerous he was and#how desperate for loce he was. once upon a time. he was a baby bouncing in his sister’s lap on the throne. and she was beautiful and tall#and soft and smart and she told him he was beautiful and loved and pointed out every name and held him the way a mother does.#it has to end there. if the narrative eats me and sunfyre alive it has to eat her too. he won’t go down without her.#getting on my soap box#aegon the usurper
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#this is one of my favorite shots of him ever. he looks so gorgeous#just. one of the most handsome moments of james’ life or something idk. he’s a beautiful person#james spader#alan shore#boston legal#*#i love how intensely loyal alan is. once he believes in you he’s all in#he’s fully committed he’ll get you what you deserve or he won’t let you get hurt#he bites down and doesn’t let go even if they call him a bad dog even if they kick him he won’t give up if he’s doing what’s right#in court and out#he stumbles and makes mistakes and chooses wrong sometimes but. in general#it would be nice to have him on your side. it would feel safe like nothing could really go too wrong#aaaand goodnight
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okay but like I joke about how much I like fireknight and how it consumes so many of my waking thoughts but it actually does . it does so much to me. a lot of it was built through fanon and clinging onto scraps from the games bc i doubt devsis will ever let them interact again but they are like insane to me.
fire spirit’s weird relationship with affection and love is also part of why I like them so much yes that was the source of the divine visions earlier .
nobody look at the tags of this post.
#he’s not built to love or love normally but he wants to. “they say true love is like an eternal flame”#he has that as one of his dialouge lines and actually I’ll never shut up about it man he can pine so hard#but he doesn’t know what to DO with that pining because he IS the fire. he finds something he loves and he wants to consume it#make it a part of him. it’s like fuel to a fire. and a fire will not stop consuming that fuel until it’s all gone or until it’s forced away#he destroys what he loves because it’s in his nature. he causes the end of the world in two of his costumes#“I don't care if even I disappear. ... That might even be better.” hey man I hate you. get onto my writing pages#but anyway this changes in fireknight because while knight is this image of heroic values. he’s also protection#he’s loyalty until there’s nothing left of him to serve what he believes in. and even past that he will protect what he loves#where fire spirit is destruction. knight is preservation.#and fire spirit loves him. he loves him down to his very being and core and he wants to be with knight and make him his#and if knight reciprocates then he is the same. and that is terrifying for fire spirit#because if knight let him consume all there was of him then he would. and despite how he loves him and to love he causes destruction#he doesn’t want a world without him. so he pushes knight away#and he pushes too far despite how much he wishes to dig his claws into him and never let go. never be separated and to thrive with the fuel#and this hurts him. he’s without something to fuel him. he falls to ashes then painful flames then back to normal then over and over#and he tries to forget but he just wishes he could love normally. love something and not destroy it#love something that can be like an eternal flame. something that won’t be lost because he holds it#eventually I think he figures out how to deal with it more but since they met pretty early in fire spirits godhood (to me at least)#he doesn’t have any idea how to handle any of it at first#And he wants his knight back. he needs a ground to walk on#he claws and begs for something he himself pushed away#you can’t have your cake and eat it too#Knight is also a criminally insane homosexual but fire spirit takes it to unprecedented levels
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definitely on my I hate men bs tonight bc why are y’all like that.
#once I start starving for love attention and affection again it’ll be different but men make it sooo hard for you to like them#individually and as a group#I just feel like it’s not even worth it to try and connect with men anymore for the purposes of romance#you can tell them exactly what you want and what they can do to make you happy and it won’t even be much#and they’ll still fall short and be fucking flaky and weird and stupid as fuck#they play dumb and they say they’re busy but they know exactly what they’re doing and who they’re doing it to#you could be they nicest sweetest most honest woman and they would still find ways to be shitty to you#I’m still going to remain a sweetheart but FUCK!!!!!!!!#all I wanted was one nice man to spend a few weeks with who would treat me right and do what I ask and sex me right and often#but I see now men’s brains aren’t wired that way… as soon as they get it once their effort goes down#I could give consistent effort attention and affection to someone for however long as long as it’s reciprocated#but niggas can’t even do that. bro it was just for a few more weeks you couldn’t keep up the act for a few more weeks?#I would have been giving consistent pussy and affection but apparently asking for gm/Gn texts is asking too much#and asking for a crumb of time is too much#why say you’re available when you’re NOT AVAILABLE#I’m just gonna stop having sex until I’m married because I’m tired of just being the next man’s conquest.#clearly connection and time spent and effort and being honest with people means nothing to anyone anymore.#talking about how you’d like things to go and following through on that means nothing apparently.#so yea I’m just seriously over it. over feeling dumb over feeling used#over feeling dumb as fuck for compromising on my boundaries and then having to put up with even less than that#mine#next time a man wants to give me head I’m gonna let him do it then leave. I’m not having sex anymore unless I’m hooking up specifically#I should have listened to him when he slowly revealed to me that he was not what I was looking for#guess what lesson learned. big time
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Griddlehark and silver springs by fleetwood mac, am I right or am I right
#surely someone’s done this already#but like seriously#time cast a spell on you / but you won’t forget me / I know I could have loved you / but you would not let me#I’ll follow you down til the sound / of my voice can haunt you…#you’ll never get away from the sound / of the woman who loves you / oh I was such a fool#you see it right??#the locked tomb#tlt series#griddlehark
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#realistically I do not have to explain myself#but since that has been bothering me for a few days now#and because I slept like pure ass last night#maybe it’ll be nice to let some of it go#in short - no the absence has not brought peace here but it seems I can’t assume the same for you#what everyone fails to remember is you only see what I want you to see here on the internet#you don’t get to feel what I feel or felt for so long#I was in a bad space for a really long time after all that#and when I reconnected with an old friend - she helped me#in ways I could never tell her#because I can’t tell anyone about that#I clung onto her hard#I had to do everything with her and have her by me nearly all the time#she was a moment of silence for me she made me feel lighter again#and I won’t ever regret that#no she didn’t replace anyone#but I think she was sent back to me for many reasons and also a lesson in the end#and it sucks to not have her here again#even to this day - many years later now - it haunts me#but it’s something I’m better at pushing down#sure there’s days when I come here and post nonsense but better than keeping it inside#its never meant to be malicious#I’m sure you can understand that#I will always love you#and I will always want nothing but the best for you#jealous I can’t be apart of your life anymore and that’s my downfall#but I want you to be happy so be it and live your life as you need to#and I’ll do the same
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