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impulsivefanwriter · 3 years ago

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The Great B-A-T-H Incident

Back at it again with more SPBNR AU sharkpup nonsense! This is the Monty + Sharkpack AU where S!Lloyd (Monty) ends up in the M!verse with five shark pups that happen to be the S!ninja. After a bit of taking care on their own, the M!Ninja find the squad and help take care of them. This leads to... shenanigans, to put it lightly.

Smith = S!Kai, Phoenix = S!Nya, Brook = S!Cole, Boreas = S!Zane, and Robin = S!Jay

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Zane had made a mistake.

Honestly, he’d thought he’d been pretty smart. Monty was staying at his place today- an arrangement where the Ninjaforce made sure the kid was never left somewhere unsafe- and had been playing with Echo and the five sharkpups. Echo was cuddling the silvery white pup (Boreas)- the one Zane could have sworn looked almost mechanical- while Monty played with the turquoise pup (Phoenix) and the red pup (Smith). If Zane didn’t know any better, he would have said that the blue pup (Robin) was staring at Monty, Phoenix, and Smith with jealousy, though Zane couldn’t tell who the pup was truly jealous of. The brownish-black pup (Brook) rested on the carpet next to him.

It was around this time that Zane had noticed the state of the pups. As in, they were covered in dirt and dust and mud, especially Brook. So, being a good brother and a responsible (though still wild) teen, Zane decided to get Monty and Echo’s help with the matter.

“Hey Echo,” Zane had said. He wouldn’t learn his mistake for another minute. “Do you want to help me give those five a b-a-t-h?”

He’d read on the internet that spelling the word had better results when getting pets to avoid getting spooked by things they disliked. Then again, these were shark pups, and surely they would be fine with a little bit of water-

Five pups turned to look at him. Three immediately bolted.

Zane didn’t even have a chance to blink. One moment, there were five pups in the living room. The next, the only ones left were Boreas in Echo’s arms and Phoenix by Monty. Boreas squirmed a little, though ultimately gave up as if resigned to his fate.

Echo squealed. “Can we? Ooo, can we?”

Monty was grinning, and that looked a little too mischievous for Zane’s liking. “Yeah, why don’t we give them a b-a-t-h? Wanna help us catch the three loose pups, Phoenix?”

Zane really needed to check his optic sensors eyes, because Phoenix really looked like she was grinning in a ‘it would be my pleasure’ sort of way. He supposed it didn’t matter; they’d need all the help they could get wrangling the three escaped pups.

“Echo, could you draw a bath?” Zane asked. “We’ll start trying to catch them.”

Echo shot him a pleading look. “Can I help? I know every hiding spot in the house for hide n’ seek!”

Zane ruffled his brother’s hair. “Bath first so we have somewhere to put them. It’s really important.”

At this, Echo lit up. “Got it!”

He stood and carried Boreas to the bathroom. Good; Zane hadn’t been lying when he’d said they needed a drawn bath ready. He got the feeling that the three pups would not make it easy to catch them, and would be even harder to keep put.

“N- Phoenix is good with water,” Monty said, letting the turquoise pup down and standing himself. “She’ll help us look!”

With six eyes on deck, with Echo (and perhaps Boreas) helping search, it shouldn’t be hard. Zane almost laughed to himself at how easily he had added the pups to the list; then again, with how intelligent they seemed, it was only natural.

Still, it was a small house. How difficult could finding three brightly coloured shark pups be?

The answer, he discovered 20 minutes later with not a single sign of a tail anywhere, was very difficult. Especially when those three shark pups did not want to be found.

Monty was very good at hide n’ seek, but there was only so much he could do with an unfamiliar location. Zane too was having troubles because no matter where he looked (the cupboard, behind every day, his father’s workshop), he couldn’t find a single thing.

Luckily, Echo came to the rescue.

He emerged from the washroom, smelling of three different kinds of shampoo, with bubbles on his arms and his shirt sopping wet. Despite the mess, a bright grin stretched across his face. Boreas (with a freshly cleaned coat sparkling as if it were polished metal or shining snow) padded along at his feet. Echo listened to Zane and Monty list the places the’d already searched, put one hand on his chin, then walked back to the living room they’d started in. Curious, Zane followed.

Echo lifted up the couch- Zane would have to remind him both not to do that then Monty was over (not that the kid seemed to mind or notice, thankfully) and some better lifting techniques- and sure enough, three streaks scattered in every direction. Phoenix leapt in the path of the biggest pup, Brook, as he tried to run for the door. The blue pup Robin and the red pup Smith both managed to dodge Zane and Monty’s attempts to grab them- goodness, they were faster than lightning- and blazed out of the room.

Phoenix barked a few times. The fin on Brook’s head flopped over in the same way a dog’s ears would lower. Zane was struck with the strangest sensation that Phoenix was making a deal of some kind. The pups did seem to communicate with each other like some kind of family-bound team. Smith and Brook took the leader positions, Boreas and Phoenix seemed to keep them in check, and Robin helped them remember to let loose and have fun.

But that was ridiculous. They were shark pups.

Still, whatever Phoenix did seemed to work, because Brook wasn’t running anymore. It was as if he’d agreed to help in exchange for something. Bribery? A ‘get out of bath free’ pass? Whatever it was, at least they had one less pup to look for and one more pup helping to look.

Because by the FSM, the two remaining pups did not want to be found.

Zane, Monty, and Echo searched everywhere. Echo’s calls were heard every few minutes as he found the pups but could never quite catch them before they vanished again; hidden in the kitchen cabinet behind the box of oatmeal, hidden in the trunk of Dr. Julien’s car, hidden in Monty’s spare hoodie lying on the bedroll he would use for the sleepover. Zane’s eye twitched. Damn, these two pups were smart. They always seemed to know how to sneak back into the rooms previously checked, causing Zane to have to backtrack more than once at the flash of blue and red darting around the corner.

Jay and Cole swung not too much later (Kai was supposed to as well, but he was confined to bed after the, er, ‘incident’ when Nya found him chugging a pot of coffee that had been infused with 5 hour energy at 3:00am) and joined the hunt. Despite the odds being severely in their favour at this point, with five humans and three shark pups searching, those two blasted pups just were nowhere in sight. The shared utter despision the two had for baths was unfathomable and unrivalled. There was no way to catch them; the second someone had one cornered, the other would kick up enough of a fuss for them to escape.

Heck, Zane had even found the two hidden in Jay’s scarf while he was still wearing it. What, were the two shark pups ninjas or something?

There finally came a point where the sightings stopped altogether and the two vanished. Jay got worried that the two had escaped to outside, and Zane couldn’t help but think what if? along with him. A quick check of all the windows and doors- yep, still closed, though one window might have been pushed on (luckily one you needed opposable thumbs to open)- disproved that theory, but the worry that the pups had gotten lost in the city under his watch persisted. He was supposed to protect those who could not protect themselves!

Though, judging by the skills of these pups, they certainly could protect themselves.

For FSM sake, it was just a bath! And with how much the two had crawled behind every dusty cubby space and under every piece of furniture and into every grease-stained spot in the workshop, they needed it!

Cole leaned against the wall, clicking on the ceiling fan switch with his back. His headphones hung around his neck. “So how did this whole mess start?”

“I asked Echo if he wanted to help me give the pups and I quote, a b-a-t-h.”

Cole nodded. “Makes sense. Have you seen how smart they are? Wouldn’t be that surprised if they could read.”

Monty sat down on the couch, swinging his legs. “Did ya fall for the conspiracies too?”

Cole snorted. “Course not. Not like Red has. I swear, he’s usually not like this.”

“He’s like Charlie from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia!” Zane said cheerfully.

“Yeah,” Cole said. “He fell off the deep end because of these pups, right, Jay? …Jay?”

Zane looked over to see Jay’s face had gone pale- well, paler than usually- his gaze fixated on something above them. Zane followed the line of sight up, up, to the ceiling and the-

There was a blur of purple zinging around the spinning ceiling fan.

For a moment Zane (and the others in the room) could only stop and stare at the ceiling fan. Zane’s brain crashed, thoughts slamming to a halt, because the two pups had been hiding on the ceiling fan that was now currently on.

The thing was, Zane could perfectly reconstruct how the two shark pups had gotten up there. Boosting each other onto higher ledges, swinging each other by the tails to bridge gaps, climbing higher and higher until they reached the one spot no one would think to look because there shouldn’t be any plausible way for two shark pups to hide on the ceiling fan, and yet here they were.

And then Cole had accidentally turned it on.

The ground suddenly became a scramble of motion. Cole whirled around and slammed the switch so hard the plastic cracked. Everyone who wasn’t standing surged to their feet in a panic, spreading out in case one of the pups couldn’t hold on while the fan slowed to a stop-

And it seemed like one couldn’t.

Like flying out of a bench swing into a tree, the blue pup was yeeted off the fan and tumbled directly into Jay’s arms. The bullet actually knocked him off his feet, and a bolt of relief shot through Zane when he realized that neither Jay nor Robin had gotten hurt.

Above them, the now-only-red blur was starting to slow down. The fan finally stopped moving and a very dizzy Smith rolled off it, giving Zane barely enough time to lunge forward and catch him in a landing as soft as a snowdrift.

For a moment, no one breathed. Then Monty started to snicker and giggle, and then Echo joined in, and suddenly the whole room was laughing. Zane handed Smith over to Monty. He could see the pup’s eyes spinning; they’d lasted a surprisingly long time, as if used to spinning real fast (chasing tails, perhaps?), but nothing compared to the ceiling fan whipping them around.

Jay (who looked both like his soul had left his body for a moment and had an immense amount of static clinging to his scarf) handed off Robin to Echo. The group finally, finally, made their way to the bathroom with all five pups. Boreas had already gotten a bath, as had Phoenix during the amount of time it took to catch the others. Brook stood on the edge of the bathtub, shooting what Zane could only think looked like an apologetic look at Smith and Robin. The brownish-black pup had joined in the search, after all, probably thinking to get out of the bath himself.

Phoenix leapt up and body slammed Brook while the pup wasn’t paying attention. He teetered with a yelp and splashed into the water. Zane didn’t think it was possible, but Brook had such a wounded look of betrayal as fading sud bubbles stuck to his fur while Phoenix appeared to be laughing.

Some kind of weird static crackling hung in the air. Zane frowned, scratching at his ear in hopes of clearing the high-pitched wire whine, but it didn’t stop as Echo approached the bathtub. That was… strange.

Monty must have figured it out a second before it happened because the kid’s eyes widened. “Wait, don’t just suddenly drop-“

Echo opened his arms and Robin fell into the water that had at this point gone cold. For a moment the scent of ozone filled the room, and then an almighty POP rang out. The lights flickered once, like a shudder, before going out. The group was plunged into darkness with a high pitched noise Zane later registered as Jay shrieking.

Zane blinked, sensors eyes automatically adjusting to the sudden dark much faster than his friends. There was a muted splash, and Zane spotted a dazed shark pup stumbling around his feet. He carefully scooped them up, then scanned the room. Echo seemed the first to recover besides Zane, standing in front of the bathtub. Zane could almost hear the fans of his brother’s processor brain whirling to figure out what had just happened. Monty looked okay, waving one hand in front of him while the other held Smith under his arm, and over to the side stood Cole with Jay latched onto his side- quite literally, with feet off the floor- like a koala.

The backup generator kicked on and brought the brightness back. Brook heaved himself out of the bathtub and shook the water from his fur, pointing a tired glare at Robin laying stunned in Zane’s arms.

“Anyone know what just happened?” Cole asked.

Zane blinked. “Power surge. But I am unable to determine the cause of it."

Monty wrinkled his nose and opened his mouth as if to say something, then decided against it. “I think we need to make a fresh bath."

The kid was right; there was an incredible amount of dirt in the cold water, despite it being relatively clean before Brook was shoved in. Zane handed Robin to Echo (after he got the promise that his brother wouldn’t surprise the pup again) and set to work emptying the water and letting new, warm water into the tub.

It took the combined effort of all five people and three shark pups, but they finally got Robin and Smith to sit still for the bath. Zane had the sneaking suspicion it was Monty and Echo’s combined puppy-eyed look that did it. For whatever reason, Smith seemed almost completely dry after shaking his fur off once, as if the water had merely evaporated, but Zane shrugged it off. He was just happy they were finally done getting all five pups to be-

“BROOK, NO, DON’T JUMP INTO THAT MUD PUD-“

SPLASH

Well, getting all five pups to be clean for a few moments.

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