#Maybe because I rarely see it in the fandom so I'm way less confident

[nonuggetshere]

Posts oc x canon because I might be cringe yet I am free

And also I just love how the shading turned out despite it being pretty simple

(the dialogue was written by my friend @bluethepearldiver )

[aroaceconfessions]

I'm more confident in saying I am aro than I am ace. maybe fluctuating ace? I'm not sure. Anyway, I used to be very obsessed with ships and multishipping, mainly my favourite characters with anyone that they have good relationship with (includes all types of shipping, with polycules). And almost always, I get annoyed and tired after seeing so much of the popular ones, that I stop shipping them and focus on less popular ones or crackships. This would happen so often in fandoms I join: I like a ship, I consume and share content, then it's too much and overwhelming for me, I stop following the ship and maybe even block it so I just enjoy gen stuff. It doesn't have to be because of how fandom treat them either. Sometimes I happily think about certain ships in my head and then not long after I get an overwhelming feeling that makes me annoyed at them. This also applies to real life where I tried fantasizing my future love life and end up feeling so sick of it. Maybe I actually have a small tolerance on romance and I don't realise it. But after finding out about QPRs and the fact that some people would actually be partners without the whole romance/sex thing, everything makes so much sense to me. Anyway I still like shipping but it's a very queerplatonic way, so I can enjoy it a lot more in my own space and I rarely interact with ships in fandom nowadays (due to how some people feel very strongly about it, in a way I don't understand). and then finding out about aplatonics, afamilials, the accurate explanation of my feeling is just YES. YES YESSSS. i appreciate the understanding of people being able to have good interactions and meaningful bonds (sometimes deep/close, sometimes not) with one other, without some sort of requirement that they must have a certain feeling (attraction?) towards a person in order for them to act that way (sorry does what I'm explaining make sense)

I think I forgot what the original point of my confession was, but I want to say thank you thank you thank you everyone in the community for existing. I still have a lot to learn and understand, and I really look forward to it

Submitted May 20, 2023

[pfhwrittes]

Thank you so much! I knew quite a few of the artists you listed but there were still some that are new to me, so I'm excited to check them out!!

I really appreciate how thorough your answers are and providing the links for the specific accents and slang. I feel like that will help me out a lot! I tried to do as much research as I could before I started writing, but there's only so far you can go when you don't know exactly what you're looking for in the first place.

I think Price was the only one that I couldn't exactly find out where he was supposed to be from and what that accent is supposed to be like. I really like the way he sounds in the games, but I might give Scouse!Price a try in one of my oneshots and see how that turns out. I really enjoy writing for things that are underrepresented in fandom so this might turn into my new favorite thing :) (I don't really follow any behind the scenes stuff or the actors themselves but my favorite video I ever came across was the one where Barry was showing off the 'coke and a water' he got after asking for a coconut water)

And I guess with Gaz it's not that his accent isn't as noticeable, so maybe pronounced wasn't quite the right word. I guess I'm just more familiar with the sound of a London accent. I feel like that's the stereotypical 'British' accent that is represented over here in the States, so it feels a little more basic? less embellished? not as hard to understand? Idk I feel like I'm still not quite finding the right word for it. I guess I'm more worried about using the right slang for him whereas with the rest of them it's finding the right slang AND figuring out the right way to write out the accent itself like you explained with the manc 'ya' and 'meh'

But anyways- Thank you again! I'm going to be doing a deep dive into all the links and hopefully come out on the other side a little more confident in my writing :)

Mr Blobanon 🤡

p.s. I don't mind being the Mr Blobby anon 😂 if they had an emoji for him I'd be using it right now lol but the clown will have to do for now.

mr blobanon 🤡! you're back!

i just had a thought, i know my darling @syoddeye is feeling a little under the weather at the moment BUT they have some fantastic music recs if you're looking for general vibes that might fit the characters. i fully recommend listening to the playlist they put together for their fic "For the Record", it's good stuff.

i'd love to see your take on scouse!price when you get round to it if you ever feel like sharing!

most non-uk people are more familiar with london/southern england/home counties/RP accents as that's what you see the most of in british media (booo!) so it makes sense that (for you) gaz's accent is the "default". don't worry about phrasing, i know what you mean and i'm not offended. the only time i get my hackles up is when people take the mick when it comes to regional/working class accents OR when they start up with the whole "scouse/brummie/northern accents are horrible" bullshit.

i'm trying to think of the best way i can help when it comes to solidifying gaz's slang/speech patterns but i'm drawing a bit of a blank. if there's a bit of gaz's dialogue that you're not sure sounds right i can give it a scan for you.

oh and some quick tips for making sure your british characters (specifically english) sound authentic:

it's shops, not store

traffic lights, not stop light

stop sign, not yield sign

boot (of a car), not trunk

bonnet (of a car), not hood

windscreen, not windshield

indicator, not blinker or turn signal

pavement, not sidewalk

road, not pavement

tarmac, not asphalt

bag, not purse

purse (for feminine characters), not wallet or coin purse

wallet (for masculine characters), not billfold

£50 notes are pink (and usually refused in most shops because they're fairly rare when it comes to circulation), £20s are purple, £10s are orange/yellow, £5s are blue

twenty quid note, tenner and fiver are all used commonly when referring to money (i haven't heard of a colloquial term for a £50 because i never have any 😅)

when writing out money write it as £1.20/£5.99 - not £1.20p/£5.99p unless it's less than a pound

when writing out money that's under a pound write it as 99p/20p not £0.99/£0.20

we use a blend of imperial and metric measurements just to be confusing

humans get weighed in stones and lbs AND kgs. height (in humans) gets measured as both feet and inches AND metres and centimetres

distances travelled are measured in miles not kilometres

distances measured can be in metres, feet, inches, centimetres, millimetres

volume can and will be measured in pints, gallons, litres and millilitres

that's all i can think of right now but i'm sure there's more! good luck!

[autisticzenitsu]

i want to clear the air, so this is the last you'll ever hear from me. i don't hate zenitsu because he's autistic-coded; far from it, actually. i just think he (and most others in the demon slayer cast tbph) is a poorly written character. in fact, if he's truly meant to be autistic representation, then then it makes the way he's treated and handled in the story that much worse to me. his meltdowns and otherwise dysregulated behavior are used largely for the sake of a punchline and -with the exception of tanjiro and maybe inosuke- the people around him either see him as a joke or are otherwise baffled by his existence, which is also used for comedy and not to make him feel like a sympathetic character. he's the butt of many a joke and that's about it, save for the few moments that buck that trend and make him more sympathetic. and while every character in demon slayer is about as deep as a 14 year old's self-insert sonic oc, zenitsu hasn't really shown much personal growth since his introduction, something he himself explicitly acknowledges in season 4. as a fellow autistic who to an extent also struggles with emotional regulation, i found his character personally insulting sometimes, so i think he's bad representation. if you love him, that's great and i love that for you, but he doesn't do it for me. to further clarify, i've only seen the anime and don't have any interest in the manga or light novels, and since that's going to be representative of most people's experience with this story, it bears mentioning because it will form the basis of their opinions as it has mine.

i want to apologize for causing you emotional distress in the first place by posting character hate in a fandom tag. i have actively avoided fandom spaces for over a decade, preferring mostly to just enjoy stories on my own and only occasionally post about them, so i broke one of the cardinal rules of engagement, and i'm sorry. it and my follow up ask were immature of me, so i apologize for that too. i hope you can understand a bit better where i'm coming from, even if we don't or won't see eye to eye on this. take care, and i hope you have a good rest of your week <3

Okay, thank you for that.

I'm not gonna touch the "poorly written" thing because bad/good writing is subjective, like all art is.

I really don't think he's treated as a punchline? Sure, some of his traits are played for laughs, but that can be said about Tanjiro's autistic coding. And Inosuke's autistic coding. And Muichiro's autistic coding. And Giyuu's autistic coding. And autistic coded characters from other media. (For what it's worth, I don't think Zenitsu's autistic coded on purpose; autistic coded characters rarely are).

Zenitsu IS seen as weird by other characters in canon, I'll give you that, but that's...reality for autistic people. It's not just Tanjiro and Inosuke who treat him decently, either. Shinobu treats him decently. While Aoi gets annoyed by his refusal to take his medicine, she doesn't treat him as less of a person, either. Kyojuro didn't treat him poorly. Jigoro didn't treat him poorly and loves him dearly. I'd honestly take far more issue with his portrayal if his friends and surrogate family found him impossible to deal with and acted like they barely tolerate him. But they don't.

(This is also Taisho era Japan; even in modern times, I think Zenitsu would get treated poorly by most people due to his autistic traits).

As an autistic person, I saw him and was like "he's just like me fr" and found a lot of comfort in his character. Granted, I'm also fully aware that if I were a fictional character, I'd be considered bad autistic rep.

I also appreciate that he WANTS to change, but has a hard time doing so, which is pretty realistic, imo.

I don't agree that he hasn't shown much personal growth, either. He grows a bit more confident and brave after season 1, he stands up to Daki while knowing she was a demon, and he can handle solo missions now. Also, his arc isn't over yet. But again, art is subjective, so to each their own.

I appreciate where the apology, and I do think I understand where you're coming from. I hope you have a good rest of your week, too!

[cartoonfanorwhatever]

Okay, I've been behind on cr campaign 3 for a good while now and am catching up quite quickly. But, in the meantime i didn't go out of my way to dodge spoilers and stuff, so I knew more or less what it'll happen. And i just watched the episode where the gang finds lord Eshteross dead after Imogen sees it in her dream and i combined that info with what was revealed this episode and developed a little theory.

So Imogen doesn't always have visions of people 'walking into the storm' when they die. But all the people who did die that way have something in common (for as far as i can remember at least this could be entirely wrong if i remember this is false).

They are all killed by people who work for the exalted/the 'pro-ruidus' conspiracy. People who are known to use an ultra rare poison that blocks devine magic. Now we learn about 'Predathos' an entity that specifically targets gods.

So i'm thinking maybe this all is connected. Maybe this rare potion is created by or of this godeater. Like an extraction of his power or whatever. And because this poison is linked to Predathos and thus to ruidus and thus to the ruidusborn. And that's why imogen could see those deaths and not say, Laudna who didn't die with this poison involved.

I could even take this a little step further and say that maybe the poison kind of binds your soul to ruidus/predathos where he claims your sould upon death making it unable to be retrieved by said devine magic. But this part i'm less confident about and Bertrand's final words probably disprove this. (Edit before final posting: oh yea Orym seeing Will in his afterlife also probably disproves this)

Also as i said i'm behind and working on half information for some things so feel more that free to point out mistakes or tell me I'm missing something somewhere. Or heck maybe the cast/the fandom already made this connection and discussed it to death beneath my notice. I just made the connection and thought it was fun to talk about.

[genuflecting]

I've had a bunch of things circling around my head for days and they don't seem to want to leave on their own, so I'm going to try writing them out in a long post that no one had to read, but if you're nosy like me you're welcome to and I promise the bad vibes can't past it past the readmore, you can check them at the door

the guy I like wasn't at the party I went to last weekend and no one there even had his contact info (I got brave and asked the person who I thought knew him but it turned out to be a dead end) so now I have to wait for the group's every other month party and hope he turns up to that, which will probably be a Halloween party so that'll be an interesting extra element. I've just been so hung up on it cause my attraction to people in real life is so incredibly rare and I want to act on this, but it feels so out of my control and if I'm this sad at not seeing him for two months I'm gonna be REALLY really sad if four months later I still don't see him. I wish my taste in people was broader so I could just. not feel so lonely!

I think the loneliness/striking out has mutated alongside dysphoria into me feeling extremely dysmorphic and sad lately, which I like a lot less than my hopeful new outlook I had for the few months before that

I'm feeling very tired of being misgendered absolutely constantly in public, and especially of feeling like my mom just sees me as "woman lite". I almost wish she just saw me as a man, but I specifically don't identify with a binary gender because I don't want people to lug in all their gendered baggage and assumptions and bury me in them, so instead I'm stuck with not being seen as a man at all.

The dysphoria seems to have been fanned by not seeing that guy at the party and feeling insecure about that, but especially by the interaction at said event where (someone who is also nonbinary) made weird and gross biologically essentialist comments (cited in another post, man I wish tumblr had citations honestly, I know I'm a fucking nerd but how fun would that be, anyway). I went through a period of feeling way more confident in my body and how my gender (and sex, frankly) are congruous with my identity and that I can be a gay guy who isn't questioned or dissonant, and that just felt so regressed by that interaction and my doubts of how people perceive me and, by extension of anxiety, how the guy I like might see me.

Seeing a post where someone in the comments conflated dom/sub with top/bottom and also made the most "clearly hasn't had sex, doesn't know what they're talking about" reference to being a "top in real life, bottom in bed" and vice versa and I just wish I could make people stop using all of those terms if they don't know what they mean. oh, you're anally receptive in your daily non-sexual life? No wonder being on tumblr set me back with my understanding of sex and relationships, people just talk about it with zero grounding in reality

Then seeing a guy refer to "transition scars" in a piece of art's replies (where the cis male artist gave a character very tired vine patterns in place of top surgery scars) and then I went to the commenter's blog and his bio said that he's distrustful of fandoms predominantly made up of women fetishizing m/m ships, ie all of them, and I'm just like Man, way to do one of the worst things you can do for trans men while claiming the most superficial support. the way I still have to reassure myself that that's not what I'm doing when I experience attraction to another man as a man, because of fear mongering arguments like that.

Lastly in the vein of maybe I should stop opening the notes of posts at all, is seeing someone claim that the "mauraders fandom" is a "totally separate" fandom from the hateful wizard books and not related, thus they shouldn't be accused of promoting transphobic work, and someone had to break down for them exactly how stupid that argument is. The fact that they're apparently telling themselves that explains why the acquaintance I know who I already wasn't comfortable being friends with because she still goes to Catholic church with her family was comfortable referencing reading mauraders fanfiction while knowing she was in front of a trans person. It was just so much to realize the fact that this is just a continuation of the same bullshit people have been spewing for years about death of the author, in front of my trans literature major ass who has actually read roland barthes and knows that's not even kinda what the essay is about.

Anyways I'm tired, trans, and angry, and I would just like some critical thought, gender affirmation, and gay sex as a treat.

[lordkambe]

Can I request how Daisuke would act when in love? Maybe his courting process or how he let s/o know he's interested in her romantically? I haven't really watched the show but I love how you write him so I apologize if I'm not giving you enough to work with. 👉🏽👈🏽 If it helps, she could be more on the reserved side, only showing her goofy or laidback side when she's with those she's comfortable with. Thank you!

💸  character, fandom, type of reader: daisuke kambe, the millionaire detective: balance unlimited, gender neutral / woman reader.  

💸   genre, rating: fluff.

💸   themes, triggers: none.

💸   author’s note:  aw thank you ! i love daisuke very much. you should consider watching the show as well, it’s great 💖 i apologize for how long this took but i hope i was able to come up with what you were looking for. daisuke is honestly such a sweetie when it comes down to love uwu

+  daisuke really strikes me as someone who gets very shy around people he genuinely likes. around random people he just wants to hook up with, he’s probably a lot more forward and confident but if he has a crush on you? oof. he’s fumbling for his words and tries to speak very little so you don’t notice it.

+  he’s dumb™. so chances are he’ll try to make you jealous by hanging around other people and flirting with them in front of you. when he notices that it’s not working he becomes really apologetic and explains he isn’t that “playboy” type that everyone perceives him to be. he just wants you to like him back and he doesn’t know how ?

+  mainly because he’s used to buying everything. he’s used to everyone being nice to him because he’s a kambe. when he realizes that you could give less of a fuck about all that, he wants to impress you especially because you present yourself to be a very professional, reserved person.

+  because of your reserved personality, he most likely met you through work. he makes excuses to visit your workplace. everyone’s happy that daisuke is there, but he’s there to see you and no other reason but that. he wants to talk to you, he wants to get to know you.

+  he never makes it noticeable, with you at least. he’s probably really dismissive with you because he doesn’t want you to notice him blushing.

+  if you’re friends with haru he probably pesters him a lot to tell him more about you so he knows what you like and what you don’t. he’s all about impressing you. one day haru is like, “dude let’s just all go to the bar and hang out.”

+  cue daisuke freaking out about being in a casual setting with you. but when he arrives and sees you ? he’s back to that dismissive vibe. it’s only until he notices that you’re not in your work clothes, your hair is down, and you’re talking casually and happily with haru that he cuts the act.

+  he sees you smiling and laughing at a joke haru told and he’s jealous so he buts in with a cheesy, stupid joke of his own. it’s embarrassing but you laugh anyway and tell him that he’s pretty funny. daisuke begins to loosen up himself and that’s when you start seeing him more than just a snotty little rich boy.

+  after that the two of you most likely started hanging out together. it was casual first before he formally asks you out on a date. the way he asked you was actually very cute. he gave you a call and told you he’ll pick you up on a certain day at a certain time.

+  it’s date night. and you’re nervous because you’ve never been in a place so fancy before. daisuke thinks it’s cute and walks you through the process. telling you which fork is for what. he playfully teases you so you tell him that you’ll plan the next date.

+  it’s not formal at all. it’s a silly little amusement park date and before you go you demand that daisuke change out of his suit and wear something casual for once in his damn life. the two of you are walking, holding hands, and wearing matching headbands. he feels so... free ? so happy.

+  the two of you are sitting on a bench enjoying a snack. he just turns to you and goes. “i think i’m falling in love with you.” you pretend not to hear him because you’re still processing your emotions too. then it’s nightfall and the fireworks are going. the two of you share a kiss he says it again and you agree. you’re falling in love with him.

+  when daisuke is with someone he genuinely likes. he sheds that brooding persona and becomes this kind, gentle young man who wants to love and be loved in return. his courting process is honestly nothing extravagant but just a genuine display of his emotions. him showing his vulnerability is the most precious, rare thing you can get.

[formulatrash]

Hi! I hope you don't mind me asking, but I was wondering how you got started in the autosport journalism industry? I'm normally graduating (bachelor degree in journalism) in less than a year and I would love to get a job in F1 or FE. My teachers however don't see sports in general as real journalism so I don't get much help from them. So I was wondering how you got started? Thank you!

Heya,

So, it’s a tricky one. There is no formal route into motorsport journalism - or to be honest most forms of journalism - which causes lots of industry problems. It sounds like you’re already doing the most sensible thing, which is to take a journalism course and learn those very relevant skills - but the industry as a whole can remain very opaque if you have no existing connections into it. 

So, what I did was not usual; I was already a BBC producer when I decided to go into motorsport and I basically shoved my way in with full princess mode engaged because it was very hard to stop me. But I appreciate that is not an option available to everyone, so have been thinking about this all day.

One of the problems with there being no formal, regulated routes into motorsport journalism is that it lets people exploit a lot of writers in their early career in order to get the clout of writing for an accredited publication but basically for free, if not straight up for free + paying any travel expenses you have. It’s cool and all getting to go to a race but they rarely provide any form of support or training and ultimately, your work is going to benefit [insertmotorsportblognamehere].wtvr instead of yourself. 

The thing I most recommend is to start creating content yourself - whether that’s writing about races or making videos or a podcast. Get yourself a social media presence, start conducting yourself as though you’re part of the industry (most people who claim to be are... fronting a little and that’s fine, it’s that kind of place) and start looking out for opportunities to get noticed, like the drivers. 

I’ve been thinking all day, because I’ve had a work experience kid in at Esports Verdict (the site I’m the editor for) all week and been training him and actually I’m pretty good at teaching people and have a criminal records check and whatever so am at least not Some Creepy-Ass Dude for trying to skill people up, neither will I scam anyone out of cash for helping them because like: eww.

So if there’s enough people who are interested, I was thinking we could do a mini-course as F1mblr, where I’ll organise some Zoom calls and you guys can ask me about working in motorsport and we’ll do some written pieces where I'll  either assign something and then help you develop it or help you work on something you’re already writing. 

Then the next week we’d look at social media and best practice and how not to lose your mind entirely on it, then like YouTube and podcasting and by the end, we’d have like a miniature zine of F1mblr’s stuff that I could put together a Wordpress to host and call it like, Season 1 or something and a mini podcast series or something and I’ll get some people from the industry for interview practice and photographers to talk about that side of it. Hopefully you guys could come away from it feeling like you could go out and confidently pitch and know more about how to get what you want from the industry. 

If people are interested in that, then I think it'd probably be like four weeks with like 3 hours a week, one evening and then some research/writing time either side of that but nothing mega-arduous. I’d love to see more people from this side of the fandom gain the confidence of a white boy with a podcast 

You’d need to be 18 (and I am serious about that cus there’s a problem with content sign-off otherwise, sorry) but otherwise no upper age limit, no minimum experience etc and it doesn’t matter what you’re aiming for, I’ll try to tailor things and maybe make groups if there’s distinct separate interests.

If people are interested, drop me an email to southwellhazel@gmail.com with F1MBLR in the subject line. Put a couple of sentences about yourself, what skills you’re particularly after and 200-300 words about something in motorsport that makes you laugh every time you think about it. 

[ladylynse]

Hi, just saw that post about feedback, and I just wanna say that I'M SORRY! YOUR WRITING IS AMAZING. Some-- okay, A LOT-- of your 3 sentence fics made me go "wait what. I need mooore" and there are Feelings involved. I know I don't always give reviews (because i'm a lurking gremlin and bad at interactions), but please know that your fics and ficlets are greatly appreciated! :))

Aw, thanks, Anon! I really appreciate you saying something now. It may not seem like much, but it makes a huge difference.

I know interacting can be hard (and getting a review/comment in tags on tumblr is rare, so if I happen to get one I’m thrilled); it just goes a long way when you can bring yourself to do it, especially if I get a request for a fandom I don’t usually write or have ever written, since I’m less familiar with the characters and less confident in what I turn out. (The Wednesday Addams one, for instance; ages since I’ve consumed any Addams Family content and my first ever attempt at second person. I mean, that probably wasn’t you--most people who request fics stick with DP or ML or can’t decide so leave it up to me, so you’re probably one of those people--but even for the people who don’t pick a fandom, if they’re on anon, I don’t know what fandoms they’re in. I can’t check their blog to see if they’ve been reblogging a lot of something lately that I’m familiar with and can write for them. So, I don’t even know if they read what I wind up writing because I might pick a fandom they’re not in, and then what’s the point of doing that request if they can’t enjoy it? I’d rather write something I know they’ll be able to enjoy.)

My apologies for the rambling reply; I got off track. Thank you for speaking up now. It’s so nice to know you’re enjoying different fics! Maybe the next time I hit a follower milestone, I’ll offer to continue one of those instead of writing something new if only because I still have one chapter left to finish for the first prize winner of the last one and the second prize winner still hasn’t made up their mind because they keep forgetting despite reminders. I certainly have a lot of options, and there are plenty I can look at and know how I’d continue if I did so now. (I’m just continuing for ko-fi donations right now though because I’m behind on fic chapters, like the prize chapter. Oops. Or maybe you’ll get lucky and someone else will continue the fic you liked.)

[muggle-writes]

Rules: Answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people who you want to get to know better.

tagged by @elizabethsyson

Nickname: Muggle is my nickname, but when I went by Muggle in person for more than a month at a time, it naturally got abbreviated, usually to Mugz

Zodiac: Aquarius

Last movie I saw: into the spiderverse (same answer as last time. I don't watch that many movies tbh except around Christmas. unless YouTube counts in which case... music of some sort? idk links for the next answer)

Favorite musician: changes by the day. I've kinda been in an acapella and/or folk music mood recently so the Maccabeats and Peter Hollens are in my YouTube and Spotify history a lot recently. also I'm eternally in awe of Forte Handbell Quartet (eta a longer video; i recommend skipping to the techno piece or the Jurassic Park theme)

Last thing I googled: "vine why are you buying clothes at the soup store" (my wife hasn't seen it; also i can't find the vine because apparently it's a much bigger meme than I realized). before that it was "chgrp not root" because work and group permissions are useful when they work

Song stuck in my head: well for most of the day when I haven't been actively listening to something, it's been the Pokemon RSE route-walking music. (but that somehow happens frequently when I'm in the no-music-no-internet room at work, as I was for most of the day, and I don't know how I accidentally trained my brain to make that connection). right now, surprisingly, I don't have any background music playing in my head. I think it's because the humidifier provides just enough white noise that my brain doesn't feel the need to provide its own

Other blogs: my main is @muggle-the-hat and I'm a mod on @why-do-neurotypicals but we've gotten one ask ever so that blog has been dormant for a while. I have a bunch of other sideblogs, but they're all small and I use different screen names on each of them (enby life: no idea which name suits me best so I may as well try them out) so i feel like it would just confuse things to link them.

Following: blogs matching all the themes of my sideblogs, (including this one, which is writeblr), korean langblr, jumblr, assorted fandom blogs, authors of my more favorite fanfictions (some overlap with other categories), and irl friends and acquaintances (including one fandom blog turned irl friend)

Do I get asks: on my main if at all, which isn't really surprising because i have hundreds of followers there and maybe 60 followers combined among the rest. but I get asks far less often than I reblog ask memes so... I'm always happy to get more. I do get tagged in ask games more on this one, but writeblr is actually vaguely organized about tag lists so that makes sense. also I used to get tagged a bunch on my main and I rarely could find the posts again to follow up when I had time to answer.

What I’m Wearing: pajamas. staying warm and cozy

Lucky number: I don't remember what I said last time, but I like a lot of numbers. 64 is a good number. recently I've been debugging software in which 0x3E is my lucky status number and 0x0E taunts me. (um, decimal 62 and 14). Also my other favorite number i can't share until it's no longer the combination to the lock to the Secret Room. (or realistically never because opsec and i shouldn't make public the types of parents we use for that combination lock), honestly I aim to be like.... ah, I'm sure the anecdote involves G.H. Hardy but i don't remember on which side. anyway one mathematician remarked to another about how the id number of the taxi he rode in was sadly uninteresting, and the one I aspire to be like, argued "what are you talking about, this number is interesting because ______" and I'd like to be able to do that for any arbitrary number thrown at me. (hi yes math is good, history is hard, math history is interesting yet i still forget the people even if i remember the math. except when things are named after people, but that tends to be, like, Euler and LaGrange and other people who did lots of cool science things so i remember the methods and the names of the methods separately which never helps)

Amount of sleep: ....depression both screws with my sleep schedule and means I always feel like I need more sleep except when I wake up at 5pm and feel like I've wasted the day. so yeah. I can never get enough sleep

Favorite food: yes (why do I have to pick a favorite?) uh, chocolate in most forms, many other sweet things, red meats (especially if served with potatoes), curry (especially if it has "too much" ginger), fresh-baked bread, chai the way my favorite local Indian restaurant makes it (spicier with just a little bit of sweet, which is the opposite of what i can get from the mocha machine at work which is wayyy sweet with a hint of spice but that inferior chai is still superior to coffee so i drink too much of it). also vegetables which I really don't eat enough of: sauteed zucchini and onions, roasted broccoli

Dream trip: dreaming requires creativity and tbh I funnel that mostly into my writing instead. I wouldn't mind going back to Korea for another visit though

Dream job: my current job is pretty good when I feel productive and when my debugging tools actually produce data maybe??? (they were not being helpful today. but i still mostly like my job.) dream job is probably this but with seniority and confidence and double the salary (while living in a similar area of the country; I wouldn't want to double my salary by moving to work for Google in California and having less available after rent than I do now)

Describe yourself as aesthetic things:

the smell of old books

the first glow of sunrise (the sunrise painting the mountains pink and gold)

a rainbow in the spray from a waterfall

the flicker of distant lightning (watching a thunderstorm fade into the distance)

this picture

Random fact: about me or about the world?

how about a combination answer: when we got our new handbell music this season, we only looked at half the pieces our first rehearsal and afterwards I tried to look up one of the pieces we hadn't gotten to on YouTube because it's got a weird time signature and I wanted to get a feel for how fast it would go and how strict the counting is...... except it turns out we're the first group to ever play the piece. it was commissioned recently but seeing my conductor's name on the page didn't tell me how new it was because he's super prolific. (the fact that it was on printer paper without the publisher's graphics should have been a giveaway but it's only the second time I've been among the first to play one of his pieces so I think I can be excused for not realizing)

Languages: mostly just English, but I took Spanish for years, so I can hold simple conversations in it. I can almost read sound out Hebrew fast enough to keep up in services, and I know some random Hebrew vocab but comparatively no grammar. and I took Korean in college, enough that I can recognize sentence structure but I can really only speak tourist-Korean, though I can sound anything out (if it's typed. handwriting is hit or miss.) in both Hebrew and Korean (and Spanish tbh but i don't often listen to Spanish music) I'm very proud when I can separate the words enough, listening to a song, to translate them without looking up the lyrics. also I tried to learn Japanese from Duolingo when it was new, but I still hadn't gotten the kana straight when it started progressing to kanji so that was a rough time and I went back to Hebrew.

tbh I "dabble" in "language learning" which really means I start a million courses on Duo and stick with none of them. with the notable exception of French, which I acknowledge is super common and probably a good idea to learn but the spelling and pronunciation seem so arbitrary I'm scared to look close enough to learn it properly, and I've never particularly considered starting the Duolingo course for French

I think I lost a few questions, because that's only 18 answers. whoops.

um... who to tag

@abluescarfonwaston if school hasn't drowned you in work yet and @copperscales I'm interested in both of your choices for lucky numbers especially.

... wow I'm blanking on other mutuals I haven't tagged recently. as usual lmk if you'd like to be edited in, or just answer the questions and tag me back, that's great too.

[waraupiero]

Hello, I'm very interested in your view on Uta/Yomo friendship, what do you think about their dynamics? I don't ship them but would be down with it in canon. Their intimacy is palpable in the manga, and it was portrayed in such subtle, quiet ways up to the newest chapter, that last panel honestly made me #shook even tho it was to be expected eventually :/

hey!!

i agree! if you look at how their friendship is largely depicted, it’s fairly lowkey and understated. sometimes it doesn’t seem like they’re all that close. heck, yomo even avoids admitting outright that they’re friends. however, there are little pockets in the story, in which they’re honest with each other, and it seems like their friendship is fairly significant to the both of them, and so i feel like their dynamic is still going to embody the whole ‘can’t live with you, can’t live without you’ philosophy.

i think the easier place to start when discussing their friendship is probably yomo, since he talks more about his relationship with uta than uta does about his with yomo, and is also more straightforward in his motivations. in the infamous drunk!yomo omake of volume 12, yomo waxes poetic about his friendship with uta and itori. he admits that he cares about them and that their support means a lot to him, and that he wants to talk to them more so they can better understand one another.

so, i feel like mutual understanding is something that yomo’s been hoping to get at with uta (and itori), but he doesn’t quite get the chance because 1. so many things are happening, they’re all understandably busy and occupied with other things, and 2. yomo doesn’t feel confident in his ability to communicate with them. i think that definitely factors into his attitude towards uta in the newest chapter. like many other bloggers have said, it’s sort of an inevitable build up of events, given that the three of them have kind of been operating separately since the clowns started taking the offensive, and none of them have (presumably) communicated their aims and ideology. of course he’s not going to understand. he’s going to be going into this fight as the challenger for this reason – he’s the one asking the questions.

certainly, yomo values his friendship with uta; however, i feel like with the events that have unfolded around yomo, he’s extra sensitive to protecting his family first and foremost. for him, the purpose of his life is to protect his remaining family, and the clowns’ plans definitely do not spare touka, ayato, kaneki, and anyone else in goat/anteiku/:re. i feel like yomo’s only turned a more-or-less blind eye to uta and itori’s membership within the clowns because it hasn’t threatened his family until just about now. so, even if he doesn’t necessarily want to fight his friend, i feel like yomo would definitely do it if it meant keeping his family safe.

uta’s relationship with yomo is a little more complex. i think it’s fundamentally rooted in uta’s fear of loneliness, along with boredom. uta has always been in sort of an ‘outsider’ position – he’s either removed from the action, or he’s so powerful that no one else can challenge him (thus making him also alone). he’s constantly trying to balance between the freedom that being at the fringes affords him, and the loneliness that a position too extreme would bring. his friendship with yomo is a rare thing for him – someone who is around as strong as he is, and also someone who is his age whom he could talk to and form connections with.

yomo pretty much becomes uta’s connection to the twentieth ward, which is kind of where most of the action is centered – that’s important to uta’s projected agenda of ‘being involved’. thanks to yomo, uta is able to observe everything from both perspectives; it gives him information and insight that is not available to anyone else in the series, except perhaps itori, who both collects information as an information broker and also visits yomo at anteiku/:re (though not as visibly frequently as uta does. uta does it so frequently that even nico notes it).

though if yomo offers uta both company as a friend and also connections to other ghouls and the flip side of the conflict, why would uta reject that and ally himself fully with the clown cause instead of dancing along the edges? what is in it for him with the clowns?

frankly, i think he does it just because he can.

in his rooftop conversation with donato in tg:re chapter 116, uta confesses that he’s excited by the idea of unpredictability and pushing someone off an edge. although he’s not technically speaking about yomo in this scene, i feel like it could be applied pretty well to yomo’s situation as well. yomo has been one of the most stable/stagnant characters since the beginning of kaneki’s story. he hasn’t been forced to reevaluate himself or reorient his understanding of something like other characters have been. uta would definitely be interested in pushing yomo just to see what’ll happen. he’s aware that he himself might be injured or killed in the process (re- ‘i myself might vanish’), but he’s willing to gamble just to see what happens, and so he plays along with the clowns.

i think his exchange here with donato is significant. uta tries to relate donato to himself, and it’s true that their roles in this upcoming chapter are very similar: both uta and donato are the ‘bad’ guys who are fighting ‘good’ people close to them. the fandom expects donato’s fight with amon to lead to amon coming to terms with being a ghoul and release his suppressed emotions regarding being a ghoul and also donato (i mean, if ishida doesn’t do this, then what is the point of this conflict); uta is similarly prodding yomo, and even if their fight does not change yomo significantly (i think it will; but all things considered yomo has really firmly rooted personal purpose and philosophy, and is less emotionally vulnerable to uta than amon is to donato) it will change their relationship and perhaps be a deciding factor in which way the clowns’ war will lean.

yet despite their similar roles, donato states that he is not quite like uta. i think this implies that uta is more affected by his loneliness than maybe one would expect. i don’t think anything uta has done thus far suggests any particular sentimentality (if anyone has shown sentimentality about this friendship, it’s drunk!yomo), but donato may be picking up more than others would (i’m willing to scrap this up to him being a priest and being able to read people much better than most). uta’s sentimentality regarding his loneliness would definitely impact the upcoming fight, and i’m inclined to think that he won’t want it to end his friendship with yomo.

he already expressed that he did not want yomo to die, because yomo is his friend. even though it would be better for the clowns to just let yomo die, he doesn’t think according to what best benefits the clowns; uta’s always thinking about what’s gonna be best for himself. having yomo dead is definitely something that would be pretty detrimental to him. i think he’s more invested in keeping this friendship alive than yomo is, and he’s definitely not loyal enough to the clowns to execute their agenda over his own wishes.

(well, as far as we know. we don’t know if there’s more in it for uta in the clowns than he’s let on. but i don’t feel like uta’s the type of guy to have a particular political agenda or leaning. he seems to just follow whatever is the most fun for him, and if it doesn’t suit him anymore, he’ll just leave without a thought about what’ll happen after. he’s certainly done that before, leaving his position as the leader of the fourth ward. i can’t even begin to imagine how much trouble that power vacuum must have incurred)

however important yomo may be to uta, uta’s definitely not all that torn up about fighting his friend, though. uta treats all of this like a game, and he’s excited to finally play for once. i feel like he’s definitely been bored in the past few arcs in tg:re – he hasn’t found a worthy opponent in hirako, juuzou, or mutsuki. he kind of just toys with them instead of fighting them. but with yomo, uta has the opportunity to finally go all out, and scratch that decade-old itch of his.

it must be so exciting to fight yomo. yomo is the pebble who disturbs uta’s pond of autocracy in the fourth ward; no one before yomo has been able to match uta. so yomo is special to uta, first of all as the first person who could possibly beat him. now this possibility is made all the better with the experience that the two of them have built up in ten years, and also their closeness with one another would make for a dangerous fight. throughout the years, yomo has gotten the opportunity to study all of uta’s moves, ticks, patterns (if he has any), and resolve/attitude; and uta has a similar advantage over yomo. a rematch of their fight from the fourth ward would be the most entertaining, so yeah he’s on board!

finally, he gets the chance to either push yomo off the edge, or fall from his own perch. either way it may end poorly for him, but he can’t resist the challenge. he’s only been able to resist the challenge with the promise of something better – he would have loved to fight yomo to the death in the fourth ward, but he stops because friendship seemed a far better option for him. but if yomo’s resolved to fight him … he wouldn’t back down from the offer. though, i think uta has a lot more at stake than yomo does, and that’s always sort of been the case with their friendship. uta has a lot more to lose if he loses yomo; yomo has relatively little to lose if he loses uta. so, i don’t think uta will go as far as to kill yomo.

the greatest hardship of their relationship is that uta and yomo’s natures mix together like water and oil. uta’s tendency towards chaos and self-indulgence is definitely at odds with yomo’s preference towards structure and service. but that’s what makes their interactions so interesting – despite the fact that they’re vastly different people, they’re able to find a friend in the other person. despite everything, they help each other out, care about each other, and support each other. differences do not divide people; you may find meaning and significance in the person you least expect to find it in. it’s quite the compelling narrative.

uta and yomo find it difficult to exist around each other without bumping elbows, but at the same time losing the other person would be a significant hit whether they want to admit it or not. although they can’t perhaps understand the feelings, motivations, or logic of the other person, life without them suddenly becomes difficult. ‘i cannot live with you nor without you’; i think that definitely speaks towards uta’s perspective on his relationship with yomo. itori also describes their friendship as ‘undesirable but inseparable’. i couldn’t find a more suitable way to put it. i can’t wait for more development on yomo-uta-itori friendship in the upcoming chapter.

i think this upcoming fight is going to be a way for yomo and uta to at least work towards some kind of understanding. itori may also be involved; or at least i’m hoping that she will (because i love her). although yomo is not great with words, he channels a lot of his emotions and beliefs into his fighting (and communicates that way), as we can see in the two yomo v. arima fights. i’d actually say that the foundation for yomo and uta’s relationship is kind of built upon the ‘conversation’ they’ve been having through their fights in the fourth ward, and this is kind of a continuation of that old, partially resolved (through the power of friendship!) conflict. although i do love the unusual way that uta and yomo’s friendship just works because they’ve looked past their differences and supported each other unconditionally, forcing them to reexamine their differences will definitely be super exciting and i’m looking forward to some new revelations about the fourth ward trio. the return of the old rival dynamic between yomo and uta – with yomo playing the role of a swooping bird of prey and uta a spider ‘defending’ his own space – is definitely something i’ve been not so secretly looking forward to as well.