#Many smarter folx than I have talked about this

[twopenguinsinabox]

Quietly thinking about how Wizarding Britain is a straight-up dystopia tn. Like, even in the "good" years prior to Voldemort's resurrection, it would be such a nightmarish and fucked-up place to actually live that I feel like every time I read a fanfic where the characters conclude "hey, maybe we should just move back to the Muggle world which has neat things like rule of law and sexual consent" I feel like I want to applaud.

[the-good-projxct]

June 5th, 2024

10:56 pm listening to Mr. Big be with you. This song brings on so many feels. Sooo many feels. 

Happy 5 year sober anniversary to me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow, it has been 5 yrs. Mbombo, how do you feel? What an achievement. What a journey. One day at a time truly matters. When I started the thought of years was so daunting. Now here I am at half a decade. I am so proud of me. This song reminds me of when we moved to Canada 24 yrs ago. I was 11 and life seemed so big and daunting. I didn’t have the concept of one day at a time. I was in a foreign country and everything felt bigger, stronger, smarter, faster and scarier than I was. And here I was, a little girl that Loved playing, daydreaming, drawing, writing, reading and spice girls. Suddenly I was expected to adult as a kid in a foreign world in a foreign language(Quebec). So I dedicate this song to the little girl: I'm the one who wants to be with you, deep inside I hope you feel it too ...just to be the next to be with you. It sounds cliche eh, that I want to hold little girl me and show her my world. Show her the world from my arms where she is safe, wanted and Loved. So that’s the plan. To lead a life that is considerate of her well-being. That is the life I hope to lead. When I look back at the last five years, I did that. I really lived a wholesome, joyfull, and Love filled life. Now for the next five years, I need to be mindful of including well-being. I know I am going into a different stage of adulting, that doesn’t mean I abandon childish wonder. TBH, childish wonder kept me sober. The first year sober felt like I was experiencing rebirth. Everything felt new, wonderful, amazing. From sunsets, to seasons, to emotions, to flavors. I had been numb for so long, I forgot how Gøod it felt to Live. So I need to remember to Live with childish wonder that will amaze 11yr old me. Being amazed by and grateful for this little life has been the he(art) of my sobriety. Great Spirit, the gratitude I have for you and to you brings me to tears. I am forever a child of the Universe first and foremost. And no matter where life goes, may I always center Spirit, gratitude and Love. I pray the day I die, folx say what a plot twist my life was. I pray folx say I LIVED and I LOVED. I want a Life well Lived. I want a Life full of Love. It is my responsibility to curate that. To create that. I am Created and I am Creator. So yeah, happy 5 yrs and all that wonderful magikal jazz life has to offer. On another note, I went to the gym today. I haven’t done an intense workout in like a year. I miss Kinetic soo much. But also, they became a crossfit gym and stopped offering Hiit classes which is what I enjoyed. Anyway I went to a tabata/hiit class today and my Pippo, I almost passed out and puked. I literally couldn’t finish the workout. I was shooketh. Anyway, I know I need to build back up to that level. The first time I did 3rd degree training, I puked. The first time I did Kinetic, I puked. So it seems like a form of initiation. Or maybe it's the consequence for quitting. Oh well. I will go to a dance class tomorrow. Then back to Tabata next week Wed. Munene and I watched a video by an Asian American dr on the brain. She talked about fitness. And since I value my brain, I will work out which will also benefit my body. Win win, innit? I am happy that my first workout was on my anniversary. Life is Gøod. I am Gøod. God is Gøod. Ase.