#Magnus has the best lines and Alec has the best facial expressions that’s all

[im-out-of-it]

part two of season two, episode four discussion post continued “day of wrath”

40. Magnus killing it in the fashion department in this episode

41. I like when they would put Magnus in more colorful attire. the black clothing is nice but Magnus is very versatile and can literally pull off anything. that’s why I think season one Magnus is super iconic because there isn’t a hairstyle or clothing that he wore that he didn’t look fantastic in. I just wish in the last two seasons, they would’ve spiced up his wardrobe and gave him different hairstyles. I like the spiked look but what about the pink hair, the different hairstyles?????

42. IM SORRY BUT SEASON ONE MAGS IS SO UNDERRATED SO CAN WE PLEASE APPRECIATE HIM??????

43. shit where was I???? oh that’s right, Simon is trying to open Camille’s little snake trapping protection box thing

44. Simon: ribs sound appetizing but not for me

45. also this is from last episode and Magnus’s facial expressions are always ON POINT

46. well good old hodge is the cell next to Jace. always fun when the person who cuts off your hand is now next to you in prison

47. ew hodge just told jace he’s the best. ADVIL PLEASE

48. I actually don’t mind the whole demons taking over shadowhunters bodies but I don’t like certain ones being blamed for the actions demons did (cough cough trying to make Alec feel guilty in a way clary)

49. Luke and Jocelyn have zero chemistry. I said what I said. I’m glad they got rid of her and put with Luke with someone else (don’t want to ruin anything for first time watchers)

50. also forgot to post this as well:

51. I love how everyone waits to be let in to Magnus’s loft and Alec just walks in as he owns the place lmao (I’m not sure if the bottom left is Alec just coming in but I wouldn’t be surprised.) Alec + Magnus’s loft = a package deal

52. to be fair, alec comes with the apartment (a little jest for season three) I just love how comfortable Alec is that he can just come in but technically, he’s been doing that before they got together. you can’t say no to Alec it’s impossible

53. BUT RAPHAEL CAN WE CRY FOR HIM YET

54. Simon is coming at the worst possible time

55. and before we get to Simon and Raphael fighting and causing Magnus a migraine, can we talk about the beautiful friendship Raphael has with Magnus? I didn’t like their friendship in the books. it was a very sarcastic but almost we aren’t that great of friends style in the books. I didn’t like it. I like how Raphael can come to Magnus in the show and not be embarrassed. I think they’re a lot closer in the show. I absolutely adore that some of the downworlders are Magnus’s children because he can’t have any children (biologically)

56. Magnus: revenge at its finest

57. and it’s so sweet to see Magnus catering to Raphael’s wounds. show Magnus will always have my heart. he’s constantly helping others even when his world is burning. literally has been through so much with Alec already and he’s been helping Alec out, Simon, and Raphael. there are no limits to Magnus and his kindness.

(helped clary try to get her memories, helped wake Jocelyn up, helped get book of the white and endured seeing Camille and magicking up a draft that sets Camille free, helps Simon face his fears, helps Raphael with his wounds, tracks Camille down knowing how difficult it’ll be, helps Alec with coming out and making sure he is comfortable, helps Luke with his wounds and this is just within 17 episodes) I’m just saying- there’s so much content they could’ve used with Magnus

58. Lydia’s back and not in the mood for raj

59. Magnus ended ya Raj so I would tread carefully lmao

60. asking Magnus to deliver Camille is a big ask because of their history. he definitely has a big choice although difficult one to make 😭 Camille hurt Magnus gravely but she also saved his life in a lot of ways. it’s not like “oh she’s my insane ex that I can’t wait to rid of” but at a time, they did have something beautiful. but when it comes to saving the downworlders vs Camille’s happiness, it sort of helps determine which choice is the best

61. Simon: how the fuck are you everywhere

62. ah just two sons of Magnus fighting

63. Magnus: children enough! if you’re going to fight, I’m going to need a drink 🍸 and we might as well make it a double

64. Raphael: this motherfucker has had Camille’s grave dirt all this time and I just find out?????? I WAS TORTURED FOR THIS? also to be fair, it’s not as though Simon went through vampire academy training 😭

65. see ya soon Camille

Simon: I portaled to freaking india and faced a cobra!!!!!! yeah Raphael, cut Simon some slack. he had to learn how to encanto while Magnus was shopping through his belongings lmao

stopping at 66 because I should remember that and will continue part three later

[lynne-monstr]

Writers Month Day 14: Fairy Tale

prompt requested by @ketzwrites (thanks!)

.

There’s a prince locked away in the tallest tower of Edom, kept prisoner by his evil demon father. Alec intends to rescue him and make him his husband.

“What, really?” Isabelle asks, arms crossed over her chest.

“I mean, not if he doesn’t want to,” Alec responds. “But come on, he’s got to be bored up there all alone. It’s a good deal. He’d be a fool to turn it down.”

“Wow, and they say romance is dead.”

“Not all of us were lucky enough to find love on the training field,” Alec shoots back.

Isabelle smiles in a way that softens her whole face. It’s widely known throughout the kingdom that the only thing more terrifying than Isabelle Lightwood on the training field is when she and her wife team up to take challengers. But the downside of her whirlwind marriage to Lydia Branwell is that it had knocked from the running the only contender who qualified by the Nephilim’s own ancient laws to share the throne with Alec by marriage.

Not that Prince Alec is upset by that. If anything, he’s relieved. With Lydia off the market, there’s no pressure on him to propose an unwanted match. It does, however, leave the throne vulnerable.

“So that’s your plan?” Isabelle asks. “Sneak into Edom and hope to get a marriage contract signed just for showing up and smiling.”

“And slaying the dragon.” Alec’s looking forward to that part. He has a new bow and everything. It shoots five arrows. Five.

Isabelle doesn’t look convinced. “How do you know this guy even likes men?”

Alec groans. “Come on, Izzy, I did my research in the archives. Magnus Bane once put a sign in front of his tower that read ‘Caution: Goes Both Ways.’ I think it’s safe to say he likes guys.”

The question is, would Magnus Bane like him? At least, would he like him enough to say yes. Alec is trying not to think too hard about the answer. He can’t afford to fail in this quest.

Isabelle looks impressed before her forehead scrunches up in a way Alec would never dare call adorable to her face. “How’d he do that if he’s locked up?”

“Magic, I guess? He’s a warlock.” Alec frowns. “Why are you so against this anyway? You know the laws as well as I do. If I don’t marry before I turn 25, the Morgensterns have legal grounds to challenge our right to the crown. I have to do this.”

“I know, Alec. It’s just…what about love? You deserve to be happy.”

“I’ll be happy when I secure the throne.” Alec grins and hopes it doesn’t look strained. Happiness was never in the cards for him. “Besides, it’s just Edom. And a dragon. How hard can it be?”

.

(Several Days Later. In Edom.)

Alec backs into the hard stone wall, his own arrow digging into his throat.

“I’m here to rescue you!” he shouts. The words cause the sharpened point to dig into his throat and he winces.

“Not another one,” Magnus Bane mutters. He’s on the opposite side of the room, his hands a matching red to the magic levitating Alec’s arrow. Both eyebrows arch upwards in a way that drips sarcasm. “How’s that going for you?”

Alec stops trying to duck around the arrow. It’s a lost cause. “Not great, but I think you can see that.”

There’s a spare dagger sheathed at his back but he doesn’t draw it. For all he’s being threatened, it’s more playful than hostile. The tip of his arrows are sharpened to a fine enough point to pierce any object, yet not a single drop of blood has been drawn from his throat.

Besides, he’s a little busy staring at Magnus Bane.

There are few sketches of the captive warlock in the archives and none of them do him justice. Captive warlock might be a slight misnomer, he corrects, mentally cursing the archives of Alicante. Nowhere in his research did it suggest that Magnus Bane has anywhere near the level of power he’s displaying. Whatever’s keeping him in this tower, it isn’t the scraps of low-level entrapment spells that barely cover the entrances.

He’s also the most beautiful man Prince Alec has ever laid eyes on. His dark hair is styled high on his head and his clothing is fine enough to cost a good chunk of Alec’s monthly household budget. The dramatic makeup isn’t something Alec usually sees on men, but it suits him. Silver metal glints on his fingers and his chest, swaying with him as he moves. He looks equal parts deadly and drop dead gorgeous.

Alec doesn’t realize his tongue has darted out to lick his lips until Magnus’ deeply lines eyes flicker down to look at his mouth. A surge of heat rushes downwards and he shifts against where he’s pressed against the wall.

“Um, can you let me go now?” Alec asks.

“Let you go?” Magnus’ expression darkens. “I should throw you in the dungeon for what you did to Harold.”

“Harold?”

Magnus gestures towards the injured dragon behind him. The beast has four arrows sticking out of its hide. As if sensing prying eyes, it whines in what sounds like pain and hides its head. “I don’t take lightly to people hurting my friends.”

“I was trying to rescue you!”

An whirlwind rages in Magnus’ eyes as he spits out each word.“You broke into my home. The only person I need to be rescued from is you.” He curls his lips as he adds, “And I’m doing a stellar job of it, if I do say so myself.”

He raises an arm and Alec tenses, ready to pull his blade and fight, but Magnus merely places his hand on the dragon’s hide. Moments later, the arrows fall to the floor and the wounds heal in a flash of bright blue.

The dragon makes a noise like an excited puppy and stretches out its long neck to nuzzle Magnus’ stomach. Magnus scratches under his dragon’s chin and turns back to Alec. “Now, where were we?”

“Prince Bane.” Alec draws himself up the way he was taught in his earliest etiquette lessons. “I’ve transgressed on your home and I offer my apologies to you and your—” Alec looks at the dragon, who has its eyes closed as Magnus lavishes it with attention, “—your friend,” he finishes, clearing his throat awkwardly.

Magnus’ face brightens. “Most people don’t include Harold in their apology.” He snaps a finger and the arrow at Alec’s neck falls to the ground, the red cloud holding it in place dissipating in a soft pop.

Alec rubs at his neck. “I take it you don’t need to be rescued.”

“Do you have any idea how many books are in this tower?” Magnus’ eyes light up. “I think it used to be a library in the days Before. There’s more magical knowledge here than in the whole of Edom. Why would I want to leave and set foot in my father’s kingdom that only knows war and suffering? I’m happy where I am.”

Each word is a blow and Alec struggles not to show his despair. His quest is a failure. There are other potential matches he can proposition, but the Lightwoods are running out of time and Magnus Bane was the closest available option. Alec doesn’t have time to try again.

“Don’t look so disappointed,” Magnus says, either not realizing or not caring that Alec’s world is falling apart. His shoulders sway slightly as his eyes graze over Alec from head to toe. “We can make the best of it, handsome. I can pretend, if that’s what you’re into. I do a great warlock in distress routine.” He taps his lip with the hand not petting Harold’s scales. “Play your cards right and you can even tie me up before you ‘save’ me.”

Alec nearly trips over his own feet at the realization of what Magnus is suggesting, his thoughts of mounting his family’s defense against the Morgensterns scattering to the oppressive Edom wind.

He can feel the blood rushing to his face. None of his research has prepared him for meeting Magnus Bane. He shakes away the image of Magnus bound up in rope the color of his magic. He’ll think about it later. Much later. When he’s back in his bed behind a locked door.

Right now he has more pressing matters at hand. Princely matters. “Actually, I was thinking marriage.” He came all this way, he may as well take his shot.

Magnus freezes. “Excuse me?”

“I mean,” Alec stumbles to halt. Because that’s exactly what he means. But now, standing in front of his intended, this whole matrimony in exchange for rescue thing seems a lot sketchier than it did in his etiquette books. What can he say to explain why he’d make a good husband. I stalked you, broke into your home, and attacked your friend isn’t exactly a rousing endorsement.

Did other princes really do this? And their princes and princesses agreed to it?

Nevertheless, he steels himself for rejection and explains his people’s predicament. Magnus looks in turn guarded and sympathetic as the full story tumbles out. It isn’t until Alec gets to the part about Valentine’s son Jonathan, whose secret plan is to summon the demon Lilith that Magnus startles.

“Lilith is an ancient enemy of my people as well.” For the first time, Magnus looks discomfited. “She can’t be allowed to roam free.”

“If you marry me, she won’t.”

“You really know how to lay the romance on thick, don’t you.” The words are eerily similar to Isabelle’s own admonition, days earlier. Alec misses her with a fierce ache in his heart but doesn’t have time to dwell on it as Magnus purses his lips and adds, “I’ll need my own closet.”

Alec nods. “Consider it done.”

“And Harold will be given free reign over the kingdom.”

“Naturally.”

“There’s only one last thing. A test, if you will. If you pass, consider my agreement given.”

Alec straightens, hands naturally falling to clasp behind him. “Name it.”

“A kiss.” Magnus takes a step forward, his eyes both an invitation and a challenge.

It’s a challenge Alec readily accepts. In a few long, confident strides he closes the space between them.

The Prince of Edom is a tall man, but those last couple inches mean that he has to look up to meet Alec’s gaze. Ever so gently, Alec curls his hands on either side of Magnus’ neck, thumbs pressing against the underside of his jaw until his head is tilted back enough for Alec’s liking.

Their kiss is the barest press of lips, but Alec feels like he’s drowning.

Magnus tastes like fruit from his lip balm, and the stubble of his facial hair scratches lightly against Alec’s chin. He can feel the racing pulse of Magnus’ throat against his fingers, along with the cool touch of the many necklaces against his palms. Magnus’ own hands clench a bruising grip around Alec’s hips, keeping him in place with a ferocity that lights a spark of hope within Alec, that perhaps Magnus feels the potential igniting between them.

After what feels like forever, they part.

Neither of them is eager to move and in a calculated risk, Alec lets his head drop so his forehead rests against Magnus. His hands uncurl, sliding down to a more appropriate place on Magnus’ shoulders. His very large, very muscular shoulders.

Please let him say yes.

Alec wants this match for the good of his people but, unexpectedly and for the first time, he wants it for himself. He wants Magnus. Not just his body, but his quick wit and his fire and his willingness to throw himself off into the arms of a stranger and a strange kingdom for his people’s safety.

Reluctantly, Alec pulls back into his own space.

“Did I pass?” Alec says.

“Oh that’s one word for it.” Magnus seems to remember himself and straightens so his posture matches Alec’s own. “I accept your offer, Prince Alec.”

Alec can’t help the small, hopeful grin that stretches across his face.

.

(“About the closet. How big is it, exactly?” Magnus asks, as he leads Alec deeper into his tower so they can start planning.)

.

Prince Alec returns to his land and he brings his husband Prince Magnus with him.

[adorealeclightwood]

Alec in 3x09.

Hey guys! 

I’m so sorry I kept you waiting. I received exactly 68 asks and 42 messages wondering when the hell I was going to have this posted. If you were worried about annoying me, please know that I wasn’t annoyed at all. It’s always nice seeing how many of you like reading what I have to say, so thanks for never letting me forget that. It means more to me than you’ll ever know. 

Now, enough with me being sappy. Let’s talk about Alec.

I’m going to start off with a scene the petty side of me really enjoyed. 

Alec’s talk with Lorenzo.

(Can we take a moment to appreciate how absolutely wonderful Matthew was in this? He does sophistication so well. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I could listen to that man speak for hours.) 

Back to Alec. 

Our man is back to doing what he does best, and that’s using his position as head of the Institute to make shit happen. Did anyone else swoon when he said my Institute? Ugh, my baby’s all grown up. He’s come so far. From constantly being left in charge when mommy and daddy were gone, to accepting that he’d never truly be the one to take over, to now. Now, it’s his Institute, and this time, he doesn’t have to be the distraction. Now, all he has to do is tick the right boxes. 

Which he does, quite beautifully. 

Address the issue? Check. 

Get Lorenzo nice and comfortable with his favorite tea? Check. 

Elaborate on the area of concern? Check. 

Outline a goal as well as the steps necessary to achieve said goal? Check. 

Provide information on how Lorenzo can help? Check. 

Conclude with an appeal to Lorenzo’s ego by reminding him of his own superiority? Fucking check.

They might as well start playing this scene in AP English classes across the country, because that, ladies and gentlemen, is ethos-pathos-logos in a nutshell.

Once all that was laid out, our man kept it classy (as always) and stuck to the facts. Lilith is a threat to everyone, not just the Shadowhunters. Lorenzo may have taken the credit for the ley lines, but we know exactly who put the work in. (Hint: last name Bane). 

Now, you guys know my stance on blackmail, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t hot when Alec Lightwood is the one doing the blackmailing. 

“Maybe your people deserve to know the truth too.”

The way his tone shifted from professional to slightly mocking? The look on his face? 

I would’ve been ready to do whatever he asked at that point, only, he doesn’t stop there. He decides to lay it on extra thick, and you can’t help but agree with him, because he’s right. 

Alec faced a lot of opposition when he decided to get the Institute involved with the ley line situation. Raj was even bold enough to lock Alec out of the system. Not only was Alec’s reputation on the line, but if things had gone wrong, the Institute itself could’ve been compromised. In the end, Magnus was the one to get things back in order, when in all actuality, it should’ve been Lorenzo, you know, new high warlock and all. Lorenzo, who was probably somewhere with his nose in the air, while Magnus - the one he claimed had been unfit for the job - was doing what needed to be done. If you ask me, he owes Alec and Magnus - big time. 

Lorenzo let all that sink in, put on a fake smile like everything was cool, and Alec was not having it. Again, his facial expression gave me life. Like, don’t kiss up to me, bitch, just get it done.

Now, on to my favorite scene.

Alec on the balcony with Magnus. 

As the great Magnus Bane said, it’s been a day. 

(Note: Alec’s little “is something burning?” was so cute to me.)

Magnus reveals that the warlocks are no longer an option, and Alec is visibly defeated. He’s not angry with Magnus or Lorenzo; he’s simply defeated, because this was their only option as far as he knew. 

So that’s it. Jace is trapped in his own personal hell, and I can’t get him out. 

He asked me to kill him, and I was too selfish to listen. 

For those of you who read Fix You, you know that I hinted at the possibility of Alec feeling selfish for not killing Jace when he begged him to, because in a way, it was. However, it’s important to understand that no matter how selfish it may have been, it was justified. 

Jace was going through actual hell, and Alec couldn’t bring himself to kill him, because Alec isn’t wired that way. He and Jace are parabatai; sworn to protect each other, no matter what. Would it have been easier to put Jace out of his misery? Absolutely, but Alec would rather do any and everything in his power to save him, because that’s what Alec does. It’s what he’s always done, only this time, things are different. 

I have to kill Jace, and I’ll be damned if I let anybody else do it. 

Guys. This is something I like to call painfully poetic. 

You have to remember, in Alec’s mind, this is all on him. He was the one who didn’t kill Jace when he had the chance (since Jace asked him first). He was the one who failed to keep his promise. He was the one who couldn’t save him, so for Alec, it’s only fitting for it all to come full circle, and he be the one to kill Jace once and for all. 

It also puts into perspective how fucked up things have to be to make Alec fucking Lightwood decide that killing Jace would be better than trying and failing to save him again. 

(Answer: Monumentally fucked up.) 

This is some serious shit, and Magnus picks up on how serious it is when he hears Alec say that he has to kill Jace. So, he throws him a lifeline, and Alec melts my heart yet again. 

He’d been feeling so guilty, so upset with himself over everything, so sure of himself in his decision to kill his parabatai, yet less than ten seconds after making that declaration, he’s spinning around to hear what Magnus has to say. 

He’s turning around, because there’s still a chance. 

Alec turns around because he still has hope. 

There’s one more thing they can try, but it isn’t pretty. It’s Asmodeus, who’s actually beyond pretty, but that’s not the point. 

The point is, they’re going to need help from the actual prince of hell, and for a second, Alec looks stunned, because that is not what he wanted to hear. It’s not something Magnus was exactly thrilled to say either, but like I said, he was throwing Alec a lifeline. 

We didn’t get to see much of Alec in this episode, but the parts we did see were everything. 

I’m going to love and protect him, always. 

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[jaskiersbeloved]

3x03 What Lies Beneath

Warning: This review contains spoilers

1. JACE

Okay but like... Boy... You need to go to sleep... And stop using this damn stamina rune ffs, like it’s not the solution... Or maybe don’t because you are walking around attacking inncoent Mundanes.... But when you are NOT sleeping you are destroying dinners... Um... Generally STOP.

2.RAPHAEL

GIVE RAPHAEL A BREAK 2K18!!! Like omfg I pity him so much? First Rosa, then Simon and then Hedi? OMG? Really? And pretty much EVERYTHING at the course of what? One day? Holy hell, no wonder that he finally burst out on Simon. I mean this first talk with Rosa? I started to literally crying :( And then she died and I cried much more... But why he was keeping Hedi shut? Like??

3.SIMON

Poor boy, got wet in the river!! The Queen didn’t want ot see him, awww... No,okay, but seriosuly? Can those werewolves??? Just?? Stop???? They literally made Luke to get him out! A young freaking boy, after such a hard time? OMG? Just let him live, where will he live now? With his family? Or what??

4. MARYSE

DRUNK (?) HAPPY MARYSE IS MY FAV MARYSE! I mean omg, she grew so much, her charachter development is A++++? This entry? Legends only, I tell you that! Also... JUST YOU TOUCH MARYSE AND I WILL BURN DOWN CLAVE! I promise you that! Omg, how could you! Robert is the evil one in this family and yet Maryse is paying the price... I will chop their heads off. Holy damn, I wonder how the hell she is holding up... But I guess that if she had lived through Alec’s and Izzy’s cooking she can live through everything...  Also she looked so damn good this episode??? That?? I??? Can’t???

5. Alec

You cutie patootie, leave the kitchen please, if you don’t want to poison everyone that is <3 Omg, have you even SEEN his face when Maryse told that she actually didn’t like the strew? His whole life fell apart XD But also... Alec, you showed you have a lil Captain America burried inside of you, go all Cap from Winter Soldier and shut down Clave pls... I know you can’t but um... Ugh... Best son? Best son.

6. Magnus

HELLO, I WANT AN OSCAR FOR HARRY AND HIS FACIAL EXPRESSIONS IN THIS EPISODE?! AND NOT CHOKING ON THAT STREW? XDD I mean god bless him for saving this meal XD You know what geniually made me almost cry? Magnus laughing and his little smile after Maryse hugged him for the second time. That smile was so soft and warm that I was like !!! And damn, he and his generosity will be the death of me, I tell you that! He just simply offered his home? Damn, I’m in tears...

7. Malec

WHAT KIND OF FANFICTION WAS THIS ALL? Malec cooking? Being softies and totally married? OMG? Writers?? Helo? A word to the mic? No? Well, okay, I’ll gladly accept that. Also,Alec,sweetie, HOW THE HECK DID YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE THIS VEGTABLE IN YOUR HAIR? HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW?? And sweetheart, control your hearteyes, your mum’s watchng! :p But well this episode was mostly them making heart eyes at each other sooo... <3

8. IZZY

Lmao this scene in the Institute with Malec and her. Girl most certainly has already planned their wedding in her head :P Izzy was so supporting in this episode? Like this scene with Raphael? Omg. This was truley beautiful. She just simply offered her support to him, saying that she will be there at Rosa’s funreal and I’m like... Also this scene at Morgan’s party... Damn, you just won’t escape this guy now, will you :P

9. CLARY

Hi there, you look pretty. Bonus points for you for not keeping Jace’s... Um... Mania from everyone. I like that you worry and that you geniually made (at least I think so) an effort to help Simon with his... Um... Mark.

10. SEBASTIAN

Hello, hello, long time no see, haven’t missed you so much to be honest... But hey look, at least your mother loves you right? RIGHT?! I geniually enjoyed his fight with Jace though... It was... Pretty well done.

11. Hedi

Oh hello? You’re alive! Then why are you... Um... So freaking crazy? Like was she like this before? Or what? I really hope it will get explained! :/ Also side note: don’t play with your food and don’t touch Raphael. I am asking nicley... For now

12. Luke

Omg, poor him. He was really between the devil and the deep blue sea... Like there was not “good” way for him to made his way out of this situation. I’m just... It was just so... So hopless... I’m... Ugh...

13. SAIA

Asdfghjkl the cutest ship omg!! They are just so supportive! And Maia geniually cares about him, it’s just so, so sweet! <3 laso Maia raining out his jacket, lmao XD

14. MAIA

Lmao the best girl out there, really. Like she’s so supportive and strong and funny, I love that! <3

15. Charlie

Lmao, good for you dude XD At least you have the number now! I mean who wouldn’t give you their number, with pick-up lines like that? :P

16. Ollie

DAMNIT GIRL! Don’t put your girl in danger! Ffs, you should have known better than this!

17. OVERALL

This episode was mostly tears tears and tears. Malec was keeping a good balance in all of those tears, ebing cute as hell. I loved the scene between Jace and Sebastian. Like the use of the mirrors was so clever, okay?? So I’m going to give this episode 5/6 and go and swim in my tears <3

[ralfstrashcan]

3x05 Malec Scene Analysis

I already gushed about this scene in my reaction to that episode but honestly, there is so much to this that it needs a separate post. Here we go.

He says this so flatly, the implied question “Why didn't you answer?” isn't even a question anymore. I feel there is slight accusation in his voice, betraying his nerves, showing how on edge he is, before the box-immortality-topic is even addressed. This shows that it's been in his mind all day, since he first peeked into the box and it hasn't left his thoughts ever since.

*“I've been busy.” (Damn, incorrect subtitles, driving me crazy.)

Sure, Magnus, so busy with accounting you didn't have time to answer your boyfriend. You're not fooling anyone. With the knowledge that Magnus already knew that Alec had looked through his things I think it's pretty obvious that Magnus has been avoiding Alec. Why? Maybe he was hurt and/or angry that Alec would invade his privacy. Or maybe he couldn't bear the thought that he'd talk to Alec and Alec won't mention what he did, will lie about it, even if it's only lying by omission. I think after that whole Soul Sword Debacle it's safe to say that Magnus is a bit sensitive about that.

I love that Alec is so honest, because this is who he is. Even with that Soul Sword Debacle, he immediately admitted that he knew when Magnus confronted him.

First off, I hope that Magnus would have addressed this matter himself if Alec hadn't, but since Alec did we'll never know. Second off, notice how Magnus busies himself with things to do? He is clearly tense about this whole affair, and this is the first indication.

“I had no right. It was an invasion of your privacy and I'm sorry.”

I don't need to say anything to Alec's apology except it's very Alec: short and to the point, very accurate, and not trying to find excuses for what he did. He's taking full responsibility for his actions.

“Apology accepted.”

Magnus forgives easily, this isn't news, but I feel like he should have tagged on an “if it never happens again.” I don't think Alec would do something like this again and Magnus probably thinks that, too, but. I don't know. I feel like it should be acknowledged from Magnus as well that what Alec did here was a serious breach of privacy and this is something huge. Even if it is forgiven almost instantly I imagine Magnus was pretty worked up about it when he first found out and he should communicate that, because I feel like he tends to gloss over how much stuff affects him.

“He.. must be special.”

I love everything about the way this line is delivered. The hesitance to ask (curling his lip, glancing around), his tone... perfect. On any other occasion I would think it insolent to talk about something you found out by looking through another person's stuff without their permission, especially because Magnus's reaction earlier left no doubt that he didn't want Alec to know what was in the box. But in this situation I can't really fault Alec, because the way this must have been invading his thoughts all day is so relatable. His tone is vulnerable, he sounds wary, as if he's scared to ask. And I think he kind of is.

“He was. A brave soldier. Like someone else I know.”

I get it. Magnus is trying to lighten the mood or maybe trying to convey that he cares for Alec, but this is like the wrongest thing he could have said, and I honestly don't understand why he didn't realize that. If there is a way to make Alec feel like he's replaceable or maybe even being the replacement, comparing him to an ex Magnus obviously cared about is the best way to do that.

This pained face says it all. Alec tries to credit Magnus's attempt to cheer him up, but he can't. The fake smile falls right off his face because the implications of Magnus's words, or at least what Alec understands from them, hurts too much.

I don't really understand this smile, to be honest. It's not an “Ah dammit, that fell flat”-Smile and Alec's :l-face really doesn't warrant a real smile, so. I don't understand it. Suggestions?

Especially because Magnus senses the fraught mood and tries to distract with cocktails immediately after this. He wouldn't do that if he honestly thought everything was fine i.e. he believed Alec's fake smile.

>>fast forward>>

I love this. I feel like half the time Magnus's No. 1 Coping Mechanism with issues is Ignore It Until It Goes Away. (Just remember the Soul Sword Debacle: “It's all in the past.” Wtf dude it was literally two days ago and it was a big ass issue and not talking about it is really not helpful... but whatever, that's not the point here.) Magnus had the perfect set up to ignore the issue at hand. If he'd gone and come back with drinks I have no doubt that Alec would have let it go, put on an unaffected face and faked his way through, acting as if this didn't eat him up inside. Magnus probably knows this, too. This is the moment Magnus realizes he can't do this to Alec, to them. And even though it's the harder choice he chooses to address it.

“You're not jealous, are you?”

Perfect.

“You were weird before, when I asked about moving in.”

I love how this isn't objectively an answer to Magnus's question, but really is. This isn't about some soldier guy or jealousy. This is about Alec wondering if he's the only one currently residing in Magnus's heart. I love that the box wasn't the only cause for his wondering; the Moving In Talk was a different incident factoring into Alec's thoughts. He didn't see the box and freak out – he's trying to piece a picture together based on two unrelated events.

Magnus. This isn't an answer. The way he delivers it, dismissive head shake and all, is (in my opinion) a calculated move. It really doesn't seem that way, but Magnus is a good actor. (He gets that form Harry. Hahaha ok sorry for that li'l punch through the forth wall. Shutting up now.) I get why he does it. He must have realized by now that Alec is feeling insecure, and going into how these people still mean something to him, and how he kinda in a way maybe still loves them isn't really the right conversation topic for now... but you can't tell me he would just shake off a past lover like that, like the fact that he's been dead for a century means he lost his place in Magnus's heart. Just remember the reverent way with which Magnus touched the objects in the box earlier. He wouldn't do that, wouldn't have this box at all if he really meant that head shake.

*“The man's been dead for over a century.” Incorrect subtitles strike again, trying to smoothen that statement. “The man”? You can't convince me Magnus would talk like that about someone he loved once.

>>fast forward>>

Again, perfect delivery. There's impatience, incomprehension and undeniable tension. He could have made sense of all the stuff being George's, but to keep all these things from different people.. he can't understand it or doesn't want to understand what it means, and it's clearly alarming him.

Damn. You can see the pain of memories, the melancholy in his eyes.

*“Why do you keep it?”

I'm not too sure what to make of that line, because it lacks the urgency from before. Alec seems kinda relieved to know that the stuff didn't belong to one person alone, tho why? The only explanation that makes sense to me is that he doesn't expect a relationship to have that much of an impact past its expiration date. Like Magnus's life is divided into different compartments and now that he's with Alec, all the past relationships he's had are in closed boxes (pun not intended) and don't interfere. It's probably a naive way of looking at it, but this is Alec's first relationship and even though he is very mature in most aspects of his life I believe there are some things you have to experience to extend your expertise past a certain point.

Okay, thanks for casually breaking my heart. As an avid fan of Merlin and Doctor Who I'm no stranger to immortality angst, but this is the one aspect I tend to ignore because it's too painful to deal with. Outliving everything and everyone you know is one thing, but forgetting them? And being entirely helpless to do something against it? To be honest I'm very glad I'm mortal.

>>fast forward>>

“Well. Now that I've seen some of that history with my own eyes...”

The way he looks, the way he closes his eyes for a second, the way he swallows. He's scared of rejection. He's scared this will turn out to be a thing Alec can't deal with. All honesty wouldn't have helped. It would have all been in vain, and he's bracing himself for that.

I'm not usually one for symbolism, but this, this even I couldn't miss. The shot shows Alec and Magnus in opposite sides of the frame, with a thick black void between them. This is their argument, this shows how they fail to communicate and reach one another at this moment in the conversation. (Keep this in mind for later.)

Yeah, well. That is the face of a person that has spend a lot of time thinking about that exact thing already. In general, in other cases, and about Alec.

So first off I wanna give a shout out to that facial expression because it's both hilarious and wonderful. Second off, Alec completely disregards Magnus’s perspective here, which is understandable since he's only just started thinking about that whole thing and is therefore fixed on his own perspective.

It makes Magnus's outburst all the more understandable. Because Alec makes it sound as if moving on will be easy for him. His frustration is palpable, because he's been in this exact same position often enough already to know that the outcome is always the same. He lives on, his love dies. And nothing can change that.

Also I love that even though Magnus raises his voice, probably for the first time since they know each other, Alec doesn't flinch back or anything. He just looks at Magnus, assessing him.

“I am immortal! It's not as if I have a choice. I can't change what I am and neither can you.”

And here they are now. Raw.

This is Magnus, full on pleading to let the subject drop.

The way he slowly walks up to Alec and finally holds onto his jacket. Alec can't deny him. He nods those little nods that you do when you know you have no choice but to agree, but at the same time you wanna curl up somewhere and feel miserable for a while.

Also, remember that stuff about symbolism? Here we have the second part. Magnus crossed the void and they are on the same side now. I wouldn't say that the worst part of their conflict is over, but they've decided to take a break from it for now, and that itself is a small victory.

Alec doesn't answer, he leans in and kisses Magnus, though that is probably answer enough.

And while Magnus keeps his eyes closed (the way he almost always does after they kiss) and seems to look at least a little peaceful, Alec is watching him and thinking sad, serious, alec-y thoughts.

“You're right. I love you, too.”

Yeah, I feel like that 'you're right' part only means Magnus's implied 'I love you.'

That line. It's so much. It's continuing Magnus's theme of staying in the moment, but at the same time it's an allusion to Alec's “I'm not going anywhere.” Magnus isn't exactly reminding Alec of what he promised, it's more like he's repeating it to himself, a reassurance. Because he's the one that was reminded of his pending loss by this conversation.

Alec smiles, and it does look genuine. Despite his dark thoughts Magnus can bring out his happiness.

But as soon as Magnus leaves we get this

and it's clear that this is far from over.

Also I feel like the theme that played in the background was the same as during those Scenes where Magnus was contemplating his past with his mother killing herself and he killing his father, so yeah. Great mood reference.

(Gif Source)

[freakypumpkin]

[part 1] I totally agree with you about how badly they handled m!gnus' anger...if you even want to call it that. It honestly felt like we went directly from 2x17 with him hurling insults at A!ec, into 2x19 where he didn't seem to care about him at all. The tenderness (and maturity) he shows in 2x18 feels completely out of place. Also, I'm still at a loss on how people think the situation should have been handled. Has A!ec told him it would then have been M!gnus lying to his people -

[part 2] - about the deactivated soul sword. His actions (blindly siding with the seelie queen, ignoring mia been kidnapped) didn’t read to me like someone doing what’s best for his people. It very much felt like someone lashing out and making bad decisions based on hurt feelings. Which I guess would have made narrative sense had it not been for 2x18 where he actually feels like a leader making a rational if tough choice.

[part 3] No matter how I rationalizes this I really can’t. I was on board after 2x18, I thought we might finally get a nuanced storyline for them, but then 2x19 happened and I was left completely disenchanted. Anyways, sorry for this long message, I just have a lot of thoughts about how this whole thing was handled.

In response to this post

Thank you very much for sending me your opinion and for agreeing with my statement. 

I was on board after the end of Ep18, I thought, it would, be setting up an arc for Magnus to be torn between his people and Alec and eventually realizing, that he wants both, that he is ready to put in the extra work, to keep both things. (I don’t count that ‘turns out I can have both’-line at the end of Ep20, because I see a strict difference between ‘I can have both’ and ‘I want both’ or between that and ‘I don’t have to choose’.)I was even on board after Magnus went that way with the Seelie Queen, sort of, as I still don’t like the choice of those facial expressions, because it had the potential of leading to a conclusion, where Magnus would apologize to Alec, where he could grow and see, that - as you mentioned - his anger had blinded him. But what we got was the same dynamic we’ve already had over and over again, of Alec apologizing, being the one to bow his head, ask for forgiveness. 

If you’d just switch the dialogue in the final scene of Alec saying ‘No, it’s in the past, it’s okay’, and Magnus persisting on that apology, it would have been a much better conclusion. There was no audience, Magnus wouldn’t have to loose face in front of others, it could have been privately resolved between them, Alec could have gotten some recognition for being in a difficult decision, Magnus showing growth in admitting his missteps and in general providing a parallel to former scenes of Alec apologizing, and also changing the dynamic between them. 

And I think, all those theories about Magnus being a double agent or under some kind of spell by the Queen, speaks about how weird Magnus was written in these two Episodes. And none of these theories came true, his behavior was just shown as legitimate and accepted that way. 

The finale for Malec, in my eyes fell flat because there was no change of direction, no dynamic. We had a climax for the end of S1 with the wedding and their first kiss. Then 2A wit the first ‘I love you’, but 2B ended with the Alec’s 25th apology, the same pattern we’d already seen in season 2 over and over again was simply repeated, they got back together, yes, but honestly, on what kind of terms? It wasn’t the start of a new part of their relationship, just going back to how things were. 

The end of Ep18 showed a glimpse of what Magnus could have been as a leader, somebody with experience, but that was completely thrown out of the window the next episode. I would even say, that at the end of Ep18 Magnus wasn’t even mainly angry about the Soul Sword anymore, maybe that had shown him, that while he understood Alec’s reasoning, he was still experiencing that extreme anger because they were dating and he wasn’t exactly in the best place after everything that had happened to him. So, pulling away from the relationship could have been a way to be more open to just seeing Alec as the Head of the Institute, not his boyfriend. 

In the end, I’m mostly speculating and I don’t mind you’re long message, as I gave a pretty long answer myself as well. Sorry about that. 

Feel free to send me your thoughts about this or other things, if you’re scared of posting them on your blog or don’t know who to talk with. :) 

Sidenote: What also rubs me the wrong way is, that I have this feeling, that if Alec had told Magnus about the Sword right away, the story would have found a way to turn that into a mistake, too. It’s almost like Alec can’t do anything right because people expect him to control things, that are out of his control.

[normal-thoughts-official]

At what exact moment do you think malec fall in love?that moment in 1×06 when Magnus uses Alec's strength and then falls down exhausted? It's such an underrated moment but one can write a whole essay on it

as a matter of fact, yes, i do believe it was the moment in 1.06 (there is a reason it is my header, after all) and im really glad u asked because its one of my favorite moments and Ive been thinking of making a post about it in forever but never got to it so [cracks knuckles]

well, actually, i think 1.06 was the moment magnus fell in love. i dont know when alec fell in love, to be honest - i think with him, it was just something that kind of settled and clicked into place, you know? there was that attraction and there was the fact that magnus was an amazing person who had amazing chemistry with alec and who fought for him and extended his hand and tried to comfort him without judgement when no one would really allow him to be himself - and who gave him a space to be more of him than any other. but i dont think there was a precise moment when it hit Alec, and suddenly he had fallen; i think he realised he loved magnus when he said he loved him, but at that point it was already cemented. alec is a steady, careful guy; when he falls, he falls hard and becomes an absolute imbecile but until then it kind of settles in slowly, lodges itself inside of him until its carefully in place, and he doesnt really know when it happened. honestly, i relate to that because that's how it works for me, too.

but with Magnus, it was a little different - he had closed himself off from love for centuries, and while obviously he only fell in love with alec because he was already on the pathway to recover and had been for a while now, sure and steady (alec is definitely the right person for him, but he also came at the right time, cuz if he hadnt Magnus wouldnt really be able to allow himself to give in to the obvious pull they had), breaking that kind of wall is hard and is, for many people, something that happens suddenly, all at once, like the crash of a tsunami wave; it kind of isnt there until it suddenly is, flooding out and filling you. and with magnus that's definitely what happened; he had a click moment, when suddenly his walls were down and he found himself feeling, despite himself

you can see a clear difference in how magnus treats alec in 1.04-05 and how he does in 1.06. in 1.04-05 hes flirty, yes, obviously interested, but hes doing it teasingly, playfully, confident in a way that is only possible when theres not much on the line. don't get me wrong, i dont think he was using alec or lying to him - that's not the kind of person Magnus is at all - i just think that it was harmless flirting and interest with not much at stake. he was keeping his kind of playboy, devil-may-care persona (with the exception of the moment when he told alec there was nothing to be ashamed of, because of course magnus "compulsive emotional support" bane would immediately drop the act when he sees someone struggle. ugh. and alec notices this, too, all right, he can see right through to the person magnus really is in that moment, even if he closes himself off). and that wasnt even just in front of Alec; the whole "playing hard to get, i love a challenge" thing was after alec had hung up, there was no one there, he was just talking to himself the dumb dork and it is clear there is not much at stake for him here; he isnt in love, so theres no chance of heartbreak

compare that to the way he acted during drinks with Alec in 1.06. its a completely different person. even in his posture, the way he looks at Alec and moves around him, his facial expressions, theres a softness and vulnerability that just wasnt there at any point before (did yall thank Harry Shum Jr for ur rights today? seriously the man is such a great actor his talent is unbelievable). and for magnus to allow himself to be vulnerable- well, that's big. that's what he was scared of, after all. that's what has brought him hurt and made him swear off romantic relationships for so long

and he says this; he opens up to alec, a person he barely knows, tells him a little about his past, tells Alec hes unlocked something in him. it's not harmless flirting anymore, its not just a mere pursuit of someone hes casually interested in; theres something way, way deeper going on, and this is abundantly clear throughout the whole scene and every single one of magnus' actions. magnus has fallen. this is serious now; hes feeling things he didnt even remember how to, and his entire demeanor changes.

and look, that's really important to me, okay, because i hate the whole love at first sight thing. so when i started watching sh, i was kind of turned off from malec because i was like "oh theyre gonna suddenly fall in love for no reason" but no. that's not what happened. they had attraction, and chemistry, yes, for sure, definitely, but the feelings that sparked inside of them were very much real and solid and built organically, even if quickly. malec is so powerful because their attraction and devotion to each other makes sense, and because their relationship is so trusting, happy, fun, and healthy.

so lets go to 1.06 - the defining moment, the big game changer for the both of them. i know the exact milisecond magnus falls in love - its this one

(gif isnt mine, i had it saved on my phone and dont remember who made it; if you do, please let me know so i can credit them)

bitch, you are seeing it happen!!! you're watching it, right now!! the way he looks up and his whole face changes; he goes from heavy breaths to these little puffs of air, looks up at alec in awe, and it's all over his face, the softness in his features, the open vulnerability hes showing for the very first time in the entire show - even when he was almost running out of magic, he still looked way more put together than he does in this moment; in here he is open, he has no masks, and hes absolutely soft and open and vulnerable. and you can see it dawn on him too, the realisation that he let alec in, just late enough for it to be too late. it's done. god, i cant fucking believe harry shum jr invented acting. like holy shit, dude

and alec sees it too; in this moment he looks down and he sees the vulnerability in magnus' face and he knows this is the real magnus; that's what he looks like without all the walls and masks, and it's just- beautiful. incredible. you can see the love and the softness inside of him and it's just so easy to find a home in those eyes of his, and ugh, i might be changing my mind, this was the moment alec fell in love too

but anygays, why now, right? what was the big gamechanger in this scene?

well, first of all, id like to stress again, just for good measure, that magnus was already well on his path to recovery from abuse and beginning to open up again; his journey through finding self love and strength to stand on his own feet and be able to open himself for others is his and his alone. alec could be his perfect match (and he is) (fuck it i dont care they are perfect for each other, i never really thought there was such a thing even in fictional couples but shit dude they really are as perfect as it gets, malec truly invented love its unbelievable) and it still wouldnt matter if magnus wasnt ready not only to open up, but to get in a relationship as his own person, and not putting himself down like with camille. of course, he still has a long way to go, and recovery is not a straight line, so he still does things like not tell him when hes hurt and downplay his own pain so as not to "annoy" him or whatever, but he is on equal ground. the very first thing that happens when they finally get together (after the whole wedding ordeal) is, they fight. because alec was being an asshole and treated magnus badly and was really rude and magnus was hurt and he was tired of always being the one to chase after Alec, and he told him that. that's extremely important, because it establishes that Magnus isnt just running after Alec or doing anything for him - he wants a mutually fulfilling relationship and hes willing to fight for it, demand it, not accept less than it. and that's fucking recovery right here, folks. it's so hard for previously abused people to do that. so hard. it still is hard for him, but hes doing it. so, again: Magnus' journey to opening up and finding space for a healthy relationship in his life is his and his alone. and they were lucky as shit to have met when they did.

so, with that being said: 1.06 (god, this answer is such a mess, im ndjdjdidicn). you can see magnus fall in love, right then and there. the moment it happens: when he falls, and realises Alec is still holding him, making sure hes steady. not just that, but holding his hand (despite that being totally unnecessary now), and asking him if he's okay.

it's really unsubtle symbolism (and i mean that in the best possible way): Alec holding him when he fell symbolizes support; holding his hand symbolizes caring, because he could just hold him as to not let him fall, but the fact that hes holding his hand shows that hes trying to support him not just physically, but emotionally; and asking if hes okay shows genuine worry and desire to listen to his needs. again, really unsubtle; but fuck it, that's also part of what makes it powerful, because when was the last time magnus had that, that open caring and supporting and reaching out for him? i mean, obviously Magnus has his friends who are amazing and great to him, but this feeling, of being cared for, so easily, so openly, so obviously, from someone who barely knows him, hell, from a shadowhunter - this is new. both because he hasnt really allowed it - after all, you need to fall for someone to catch you - and because he just. hasnt had that. every time before, when he showed vulnerability, he had his wounds open wide and used against him - with asmodeus after his mom, with Camille after whatever happened that made him consider suicide. and then suddenly this guy shows up, and Magnus didnt even mean to be vulnerable in front of him, not really, he was supposed to hold it, but he does and what he finds is just- caring. worrying. sweetness. a grounding presence and touch. alec is completely focused on him, and isnt rushing him to get back on his feet or anything - hes just holding him and being there for him. he wasnt even looking for it, and suddenly there it is - that trust and reciprocity hed been craving for so long.

and yeah, its unsubtle, but that's also there in more subtle ways; magnus asks for his help, and alec comes without questioning, even if he's mad with pretty much everyone involved. he asks Alec to give him his strength, and he does, openly, without walls - dude, that is so intimate, and you can see how easily the magic flows between them; that's something that can only happen so smoothly if the required trust is given without a second thought. alec is giving his life force to this guy, whom he barely knows, and he doesnt hold back at all - Magnus needs it, he gives it. easy, simple. trusting. an open, clear connection. hes worried about Magnus from the start; he gets in and his first reaction is yelling for magnus and kneeling beside him to make sure hes okay. hes already kind of holding magnus even before magnus falls; he puts himself in a position where hes kind of supporting magnus' weight, and just focuses on giving magnus what he needs. up to this point no one even bothered to ask magnus what he needs. and look, Alec isnt perfect, and he definitely still has his prejudices and ignorance at this point, but this is something special. having someone just give it their all to make sure ur okay, from the get-go, trusting you like that- that's not everyday. specially not for magnus. I think maybe Magnus wouldnt even have lowered his guard enough to have that stumble if Alec hadnt been so easily showing him hes in there together with him, as equals, without so much as a second thought- magnus' persona is polished. hes been through worse without stumbling both before and after. his guard was already down, because Alec had been showing himself to be trustworthy from the start.

and after that, it just keeps going. alec helps him clean up his apartment, without being asked, long after everyone else has already gone - he listens to Magnus talk about his past, attentively, without judgement. he even shows some vulnerability of his own - that fucked-stupid smile when magnus raised his hand to his lips, the glances he throws magnus' way, the way he even manages to talk a bit about his insecurities and confusion; hes opening himself up to Magnus, too. hes smitten. hes interested. the connection is established. he stays the night, and they end up talking all night long, despite the fact that Alec was called to work, and we dont even know about what. we know they are similarly competitive and have a good chemistry, so clearly this was a good, fun talk; but theres something running way deeper in there, too. magnus is showing alec a lot of himself, and alec is not only welcoming it, but reciprocating it as best as he can. that moment of spark isnt gone; it keeps growing, the bond that was formed gets stronger. at this point, Magnus has fallen (i firmly believe that he fell in that exact moment he looked up at Alec) but it gains shape and strength during that night and talk; its a little frustrating because Alec cant face what he wants, but the pull is real and strong enough for it to get stronger, the shapes clearer.

so- yeah. Magnus fell for Alec in 1.06, the moment he realised that he was willing to have his back, to see him as he was and welcome it and treat it with care; and to give him back in return. Magnus fell for Alec when he realised that, somehow, he had already formed the beginnings of a bond with him - the kind that's solid, that means trust and care and effort while also being easy, fun, nice. alec fell for magnus when he looked at him and saw someone that was also struggling with showing who he was, but who wasnt scared; someone who was kind, and good, and willing to listen to him and try to help him and who valued him. and that is so. fucking. important.

[bytheangell]

Dreaming Wide Awake: Chapter Five

(Read on AO3) (read from the start) 

Alec wakes up slowly the following morning, not wanting to move from the warmth of the body he's pressed up against. He buries his nose a little further into the soft hair it's nuzzled against…

...and then freezes, remembering where he is and, more importantly, who he's with. Alec swallows thickly before opening his eyes just barely enough to confirm that he's pressed up against Magnus, on top of the sheets, with an arm draped over him. At least magnus isn't awake yet - or if he is he isn't showing any signs of it, still motionless besides a slow, rhythmic breathing. 

Alec makes very slow, deliberate movements to remove his arm first, and then inch himself back towards the other side of the bed. There’s nothing he can do to prevent the shift in the mattress however, and Magnus stirs the moment their bodies aren’t connected, mumbling something a little incoherently while reaching back, still half-asleep, to grab at the now-missing source of heat. 

To grab at Alec. 

Part of Alec wants to let him, to move closer, wrap himself back up around Magnus and pretend he never woke up and tried to move away, but a second later Magnus is rolling over with a look of disorientation, followed by surprise as he pulls his arm back quickly. 

“Hey,” Alec says, internally cursing himself for the greeting. Hey? Really? “Sorry I woke you.” 

Magnus shakes his head. “It’s fine. I was only sleeping on and off anyway,” he says, but there’s something thoughtful in the statement that leaves Alec wondering how long Magnus was awake before. Was it while Alec had his arm wrapped around him? Had he done anything else throughout the night? 

“Why are we on top of the covers?” Alec asks instead, scrunching his face a bit in confusion over the realization. Alec doesn't always use the covers, he runs hot almost all of the time, but Magnus runs cold and has to be freezing on top of the comforter. 

“Because you were already snoring by the time I got out of the shower last night,” Magnus says. “It was too precious to wake up.”

 Alec feels a light flush creep across his cheeks. 

“I do not snore,” he insists, even though Magnus is far from the first person to tell him that he does and he knows it has to be true, no matter how vehemently he denies it each and every time. 

“You do. And, as previously stated, it’s precious,” Magnus emphasizes. Instead of reacting to that Alec decides to get up and head over to the bathroom to wash his face instead, hoping the cool water will take care of some of the redness in his cheeks in addition to waking him up a bit. 

A glance at his watch tells him it’s 11:00 am. “We didn’t quite sleep until noon, but we made a good attempt,” Alec calls out towards Magnus. 

“Well you could always come back to bed and we could give it another hour,” Magnus yells back from the other room. Alec can hear the smile in his words but he’s grateful to be in another room because he absolutely doesn’t control his facial expression at the suggestion, one that’s mostly pained over how much he wants to do just that even though he knows Magnus is only joking. 

“And miss brunch?” Alec calls back instead. 

“Mimosas it is,” Magnus agrees, and Alec allows himself to imagine he hears a bit of the disappointment he feels in Magnus’ tone, though he’s aware he’s just projecting. When Alec comes back out into the bedroom Magnus is already changed and flashing him a smile. 

Alec gets ready and fills Magnus in on anything he might need to know about his family and the area around the villa - that when it comes to Robert avoidance is the best technique, while occasionally Maryse can have her moments, and Max will grow on him fast… probably too fast, and then he won’t be able to shake him no matter how hard he wants to. 

“We’ll end up shopping with Isabelle at least four times this month,” Alec warns. “Which will be less of a punishment for you than it is for me probably,” he adds with a laugh. 

Magnus nods. “You’ll end up shopping with me at least four times this month,” Magnus points out. “Maybe you’ll get lucky and we can leave you behind a few trips.” 

Alec tenses, frowning at the suggestion. Not that he has anything against Magnus doing things with Isabelle, or even on his own, but it’s only the first day and the fact that Magnus is actively planning time away from him is more upsetting than he cares to admit. 

“I should be so lucky,” Alec recovers quickly, hoping Magnus doesn’t catch his hesitation. 

No one else is in the kitchen when they get downstairs to discover a spread of food left behind for them to eat. Some of the food is still fresh, other parts need to be warmed up which are most likely from his parents who always get the earliest start. While they eat, sitting across from one another at the table, Alec tries desperately not to think about how much he wishes he could have this every morning and not just for the month. 

Isabelle makes her way into the kitchen just then, already dressed in a bathing suit and coverup, bag slung over her shoulder carrying a towel, lotion, and a book to read. “You two joining me down at the beach?” She asks hopefully. 

“Would you hate me if I say I just want to stay around the house today?” Magnus asks. “I know I said I wanted to see everything right away but I’m a little wiped out from the travel, if I’m being honest. You can go do whatever without me if you want,” he adds quickly. 

Alec only shakes his head. “I’m good with staying here! I meant what I said yesterday - whatever you want to do, I’m here for it. Even if it’s just doing nothing. It isn’t a vacation if you run yourself ragged for a month.” He conveniently leaves out the bit that he really just wants to spend as much time with Magnus as possible while he has the built-in excuse to. 

Izzy laughs. “Yeah, if you wanted to exhaust yourself you could’ve just stayed back for that internship you got,” she chides him. 

Alec gives a sharp intake of breath, trying to shoot his sister a warning look that she misses entirely as she turns to rifle through the fridge for something. 

“Internship?” Magnus asks, quirking an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, that one at Morgenstern’s,” Izzy says casually. It isn’t until she turns around with the bottle of water she was looking for in hand that she notices the expressions on both of their faces - Alec’s wincing and Magnus’ shocked. 

“You got in?” Magnus asks, not without an undertone of accusation. 

Izzy has the decency to give Alec a quick, apologetic grimace before saying, “I should go before I miss the midday sun,” mouthing the word ‘sorry’ to Alec as she passes towards the door. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Magnus continues, not dropping the question, and Alec struggles to find an answer that justifies keeping it from him that isn’t the truth… because the truth is that they’d applied together and when Magnus didn’t get in he was heartbroken. Not only did Alec not want to do it without him, he certainly didn’t want to be a constant reminder of that missed opportunity, especially when Alec hadn’t even wanted it in the first place, not really. 

“Like Izzy said - I’d rather enjoy a summer off,” Alec deflects. 

“I didn’t ask why you didn’t go. I asked why you didn’t tell me,” Magnus points out, not having any of his attempts to side-step the question posed. 

Alec can only shrug. “It didn’t seem like a big deal if I wasn’t going to take it,”  he starts, but immediately knows that’s the wrong thing to say when Magnus’ lips press together into a thin, tense line. 

“Yeah. You're right, it isn’t a big deal. It’s your life. I guess I shouldn’t have assumed when you didn’t say anything about it.” 

Alec frowns, not sure if Magnus is more upset with the fact that Alec got in or the fact that Alec didn’t tell him that he got in.

“Magnus, I-” 

“So how about that pool?” Magnus cuts him off, and there’s nothing more Alec can say without feeling like he’s only inviting trouble while Magnus turns and walks off without giving Alec the chance to reply either way. 

The rest of the day continues on with a clear distance between them. They talk a little but not nearly as much as they did during breakfast, and there’s a new tension in Magnus that Alec can’t figure out. 

Thankfully things ease up once Isabelle returns, though Alec wonders how much of that is an act for the sake of keeping up appearances. He gets a few minutes alone with her when Magnus goes to wash up after a day in and out of the pool. 

“Sorry about earlier,” Izzy says the moment Magnus is out of earshot. “Didn’t mean to get you in trouble with your boyfriend.” 

Alec isn’t sure he’ll ever get used to hearing that word in association with Magnus… which is probably for the best, considering it’s only going to last a month. Maybe less if he keeps screwing up his real friendship. 

“You didn’t, it’s fine,” he says, hoping she’ll drop it. 

“Why didn’t Magnus know about the internship?” Izzy prys. 

“I wasn’t going, so it didn’t seem like a big deal,” Alec says, this time making sure his tone clearly conveys the fact that he’s done discussing it. 

Izzy gets the hint and drops the subject just as Magnus comes back out to tell them that their parents said it was time for dinner. 

It isn’t often that the Lightwoods are all in one place for a family dinner, even on vacation. At home, someone is always working late, or off at school, or at a friend’s house. Alec knows because he’s the one with an excuse to not be in that house as often as he can get away with it, which is pretty often. 

Alec and Magnus are the last two at the table, not that it matters because everyone left them seats next to one another anyway. 

“So, Magnus, tell us about yourself,” Maryse starts. 

“There isn’t much to tell, really,” Magnus says, causing Izzy to laugh. 

“Really? Apparently Alec didn’t get that memo since he talks about you all the time,” she says, tone light and teasing. 

Alec wants to sink into the floor. He doesn’t think he talks about Magnus that much, no more than any of his other friends, but… maybe that isn’t entirely true. He certainly never expected to be in a position where he’d be called out on it in front of Magnus. 

“Is that so?” Magnus asks, eyes glistening with amusement at Izzy’s statement - if he’s weirded out by it he certainly doesn’t show it. In fact, Magnus leans playfully against Alec’s shoulder, glancing up at him with a smile. Alec’s heart skips a beat or two at the look Magnus gives him, forgetting that it’s just an act for a moment or two. “Only good things, I hope?” Magnus asks with a wink. 

“Only the best,” Alec replies, hoping this might be a sign that Magnus forgives him for everything earlier with the internship. Or maybe he’s just a much better actor than Alec gives him credit for. Either way, Alec places his hand over Magnus’ where it rests on the table and gives a little squeeze. 

Izzy beams. 

Alec pulls his hand back away to take a bite of food. It’s just a little thing, but he already misses the casual contact, much the way he had rolling away from Magnus in bed that morning. 

“Maybe to you,” Robert says to Isabelle. “But I haven’t heard a word before this trip about him.” 

Alec sighs, fighting the urge to point out that he hadn’t held a proper conversation with Robert in months when he’s making it out like Alec is intentionally just keeping this one thing from him rather than actively avoiding as much contact as possible. 

Maryse catches Robert’s judgmental tone and attempts a bit of damage control. “Yes, I’d love to learn more about the boy who caught Alec’s heart so suddenly,” she chimes in, trying to reel the conversation back. 

Alec watches Magnus consider that statement. “Well, I’m focusing my studies on human rights law,” Magnus starts. It’s as far as he gets before Robert huffs out a derisive snort of breath through his nose. Alec’s hands ball into fists at his side; would it kill Robert to just pretend to be a decent human being for one goddamn second?! 

Alec opens his mouth to say something but before he can Magnus’ hand is over his own at his side, smoothing a comforting circle onto the back of his hand and giving Alec a small, almost imperceivable shake of his head. For a second Alec’s about to ignore Magnus’ silent call to stand down and jump to his defense but Magnus continues before he can. 

“However, I come from a long line of military commanders,” Magnus adds quickly. Alec can pick out the tension behind his words but it’s barely noticeable if you don’t know what to look for. 

Robert Lightwood certainly doesn’t, and perks up at the mention. “Military, eh?” 

“Yes, sir. My father’s still active duty, grandfather and great grandfather both retired generals.” 

“I see,” Robert says, clearly impressed with the discovery. “Tell them we appreciate their services. Have you considered enlisting after graduation? I’m sure they expect you to.” 

Magnus’ hand is still over Alec’s but the circles stop, grip tightening under the table at his side. Why is Magnus doing this, when it clearly bothers him? 

“It’s an option,” he says vaguely, finally letting go of Alec’s hand to reach for his wine and proceeding to down nearly half the glass in one go. 

The conversation shifts from there, but it’s clear Robert is a little more welcoming of Magnus after that, though Magnus quickly shuts down any further talk of his family with subject changes. 

Alec doesn’t get a chance to talk to him about it until much later as they change for bed. Alec was forced to stay back and help clean up after dinner, and Magnus was already in the bathroom when he got back to their room. This time, however, Alec’s determined not to fall asleep first despite the yawns he stifles while Magnus showers. 

“Hey,” Alec says, sitting up in bed when Magnus emerges in his robe. 

“Well, that could’ve gone worse,” Magnus points out. 

“It could’ve gone a lot better, too. You don’t have to humor him.” 

“Yes, I do. I’m a guest in his house for the next month and I don’t want him to hate me.” Magnus is clearly resigned to the idea of trying to win over the Lightwoods. Alec doesn’t know why he didn’t expect this, but he’s cursing himself for the oversight now. 

“But I don’t want you to feel like you have to be someone you aren’t around him. I do that because I’m his son and I have to. You, at least, should be spared.” Alec sighs. “I should’ve known better. I thought they could be civil for one fucking month, but of course they can’t, and now you’re stuck putting up with the same bullshit--” The longer Alec talks the more angry his tone grows, voice rising to dangerous levels considering the way the old house echoes. He starts to pace, thumbnail digging into his palm instinctively. He’s so wrapped up in venting his frustration that he doesn’t notice Magnus walk over and shut the door until Magnus is walking back towards him and taking Alec’s hands in each of his own, separating his nail from the irritated skin beneath it. 

“Hey, hey. Deep breaths, it’s all good. I mean it isn’t, because your dad is clearly an asshole, but I’m fine. This is fine.” Magnus gives Alec’s hand a squeeze. Their eyes meet, and for a moment Alec holds Magnus’ gaze, searching for any sign Magnus is just saying that to make him feel better. But then Magnus’ gaze drops down, lingering over the curve of Alec’s neck, his collarbone, his… 

“Why don’t we take your mind off all of that,” Magnus suggests, his words slow and suggestive, voice lower than normal as he takes a step forward to close the gap between them. Despite the shudder the sound brings down Alec’s spine he wants to shake his head and tell Magnus that what he really wants - what would really make him feel better just then - would be to fall asleep the same way he woke up this morning, wrapped around Magnus and taking comfort in the most mundane of bedroom interactions.

But he can’t say it because that isn’t what this is. That isn’t what they are, no matter how much Alec might wish it to be the case, and he knows that. 

So instead Alec nods, melting into Magnus’ touch as his lips (with just a hint of teeth) come to meet the side of Alec’s neck as Alec’s head drops back to expose as much surface area as possible for Magnus to work down. 

Alec allows himself to fall into bed with Magnus, taking what he can get... even when it isn’t what he needs.