#MUST BE MISSIN' AN ANGEL

[milliesfishes]

Maybe a reverse, where Billy thinks your cheating on him. But you not?

౨ৎ꣑ৎbilly thinks you're cheating (you're not)౨ৎ꣑ৎ fem reader x billy the kid

"Oomf," Billy grunted as you flung yourself into his arms, chuckling when you wrapped yourself around him, squeezing tight with no intention of letting go. "Hey there sunshine."

"Twenty days." Your words were muffled by his chest.

"Really? Coulda sworn it was nineteen," Billy smiled, bending slightly so he could wrap his arms around your waist and lift you up so you were at eye level. "Missed ya though, angel. Missed ya bad."

You gave an excited little squeal, your arms and legs both wrapped around him now. He laughed, pressing kiss after kiss onto your face. "Been missin' m' baby forever."

"Never ever leave again, not for a million years," you raised your head and smiled as he gave you a lazy little kiss.

"Let's shoot for two million, hm?" he shifted you on his hips, jostling you slightly. "'S long as you're on me like this I ain't movin'."

You buried your face into his neck, and he petted your hair, twirling strands between his fingers. "Ya in the mood to go out? Or are ya tired?"

"No! No I wanna go out with you!" you smiled and nodded enthusiastically, and Billy grinned broadly. He leaned into you, and you knocked his hat off his head so you could kiss him better.

"Alright, alright," he laughed. "Leave my hat alone."

"It was in the way." You kissed his cheeks, then his nose, nudging your own against it. "I wanna kiss you."

"Oh my poor baby," Billy swayed back and forth with you on his hips. "Goin' a whole three weeks without kisses."

"Your kisses," you corrected, bending to kiss his neck. "I want kisses and cuddles and-"

He mock-pouted, pressing one, two, three kisses to the bridge of your nose, then the tip, then your lips. "Good thing I got nearly a month's worth 'f kisses and cuddles to give ya."

It was hard to stop kissing him for more than a few seconds. You wanted him close, nearly depraved after his long absence.

Dozens upon dozens of kisses later, you were neatly tucked under his arm at the bar as he ordered a drink for you. You gave a smile to the bartender, who you were friendly with.

"How're you doing?" you asked in your sweet way, leaning forward on the counter.

"Can't complain," he smiled back, sliding your drink over. "Always a good night when I getta see ya, beautiful."

You giggled and Billy slid his hand around your waist. "C'mere, baby." He pulled you over to where his boys were sitting at a table, keeping you standing right against him. "Right here with me," he kissed your head. "Missed ya too much to let go of ya for more than a second."

He dug his nose into the side of your head, right below your hairline and inhaling, one of his arms holding you around your waist and pulling you back into his chest. The feeling of his big, warm hand half on your tummy made you smile. Billy's lips found the spot on your head, his nose shifting into your hair and he said, "Been missin' this spot...only place that feels like home, sunshine."

You turned around, tilting your head all the way up to look at him and smiling, your signal for a kiss. He obliged, pecking your smile once, then again and once more. You craved him like air and water, especially in times like these when he'd been gone for a long time.

Billy parted from you to find the washroom, and you wandered back over to the bartender to chat, standing on your tiptoes to lean over the counter. He laughed as he watched you. "Got somethin' to tell me?"

"You're cheeky," you smiled. "No, just wanted to see how you're doing."

"Aww, you're a sweetheart," he was cleaning a glass, and he set it down, resting his forearms on the counter. "I'm doin' good. Tara's been doin' better so things've been happier."

"You must be so excited," you said kindly when he referred to his pregnant wife.

"We are," he grinned at you. "Ya know, I've been cooking since she's been off her feet 'n I burned myself real bad." He held up his hand, showing you the red welt.

You gasped, reaching for his hand and holding it closer to you to study. "Oh my goodness. That looks so painful, are you okay?"

"It's feelin' just fine now, beautiful," he smiled at your concern and watched you study the mark. "Tara just about banned me from the kitchen after that."

"I don't blame her," you touched the mark and he winced lightly. Smiling sheepishly at your mistake, you put your hand on his arm and put his hand back on the counter. "Oh-! Sorry."

"'S all good," he laughed it off. "You're a good girl to be worried."

You were about to respond when you felt a hand wrap itself around the one of yours on the counter. Billy squeezed it, leaning down to look you in the eye. "Hey, can I talk to ya for a second?" After you nodded, he led you to one of the back rooms, shutting the door behind him.

Tucking a wayward strand of hair behind your ear, you asked, "Is everything okay?"

Billy sucked in a breath and came closer, taking his hat off. He still held one of your hands loosely. "Darlin'...ya know I'd understand if ya didn't want to be with me anymore, right?"

Frowning, you tilted your head, his words seeming to come out of the blue. "What?"

"I love ya," he said sincerely, searching your eyes and putting his hat on a nearby table so he could take your other hand and squeeze it. "I know it's hard to be an outlaw's sweetheart. I know I'm gone for long periods of time...if ya found someone else who could take better care of ya I wouldn't be mad. I just want ya to be happy."

Nothing about his confession made sense to you. Your elbows unbent so you were still holding his hands, but further down so you could step closer to him, your face close to his. "Billy. What are you talking about?"

He tilted his head, his face falling a little as he looked at you. "Pretty. Whatever thing you've got goin' on with the bartender."

Your lips parted as his gentle accusation hit you. You shook your head slightly at the absurdity of the statement. "Billy-"

"I know I was just gone for a long while," Billy squeezed your hands. "It ain't my business what you were doin'-"

"Billy!" you burst out, putting a stop to it. He frowned confusedly.

Squeezing his hands back and standing on your tiptoes, you pressed a single kiss to his lips. "Billy. There's nothing going on with me and him."

He was confounded. "There's not?"

"No," you shook your head, smiling softly. "There's not."

Billy still looked like he didn't understand. "But you were...you were holdin' his hand...looked like you were flirtin' cause you were all smiley..."

"Oh, Billy, Billy." you wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. You felt terrible for making it seem like you'd been unfaithful. "My love. I'm so sorry it looked like I was doing something bad." You pulled back to look into his eyes. "I would never, ever do that to you. I love you so much."

He melted a bit at that. "He's just a friend?"

"We were just talking about his wife," you promised, and he lightened up at that. "She's having a baby. He was showing me his hand because he was cooking for her and he burned himself real bad."

Billy heaved a sigh of relief, sliding his arms around you under yours and squeezing you tight. He kissed your hair and you smiled.

"I'm sorry," you breathed, and he dipped his head to kiss you. "I know sometimes I get a little touchy with people and it looks bad."

"It's alright sunshine," Billy cooed, lifting you off your feet and swaying you back and forth lightly. "You're a sweet girl...I shoulda known you were just makin' nice."

You looked up at him, happy to be bundled in his arms. Billy rested his cheek on the top of your head. "Sweet girl...'s gonna getcha in trouble someday."

Giggling, you burrowed into him and kissed his neck where you could reach. "Lock me up."

"We got enough to worry about with me gettin' locked up," Billy teased, stroking your hair. His nose found the spot below your hair again and he breathed in. "Yeahh, there we go. Home. Smells like home."

come talk about billy here!

[withonly-sweetheart]

masterlist

you've been warned. my mind is not a pretty place <3

check the tw of each fic before reading please !!

─ ⊹ ⊱ ☆ ⊰ ⊹ ─

leon kennedy x reader

full fics <- longer than 1k <3

૮ . . ა⁩

the floor is lava

leon signs up for the netflix competition, "the floor is lava," dragging you along with him.

just our summer

you and leon have been working at the same summer camp as counselors for four years straight. now you're going off to college.

seven years close

do you accept leon's proposal to marry? you can't tell if he's trying to get into your bed or if he has genuine feelings.

not quite right

you're leon's mystery, he's your mystery. he defends your honor without hesitation, but being around you has him questioning his own morals.

the sound of us

you've always wondered about the peculiar sounds that come from your neighbor's apartment, right next to yours. one day, after a breakup, he shows you.

runoff

right after your most recent breakup, you finally notice the guy that you know better than you know yourself.

to keep an angel

he fell from heaven into your arms, but he cannot stay. perhaps if you hadn't acted so hastily, if you had waited a little longer, you could've been reunited...

back to the sea

the mysterious stranger on the boat happens to be your roommate and you can't help but wonder who he is. something about him captivates you, but what happens when an artist loses his brush?

reap what you sow : part one | part two

you've been reaped, and your partner is not the man you want to be spending a bloodbath with. but what if he's nothing like what you expected?

bloody dove

you didn't know the effect a vampire's eyes could have on you, or your life. fooled yourself into thinking you were his pretty little dove, didn't you? well, all pretty things must rot eventually.

shades of gray

stylists and photographer; both such burdens but nothing can prepare you for the way leon's arrival tips over your "shades of gray".

feathered fiend | beast

you unburden yourself on a creature that should have no burdens. you tell it of your unrequited love, but is all truly what it seems? + he took you with him to his haven in the woods, against your will, but you've grown used to him. betrayal falls from your fingertips, the glinting blade you've always held.

only love can break your heart

you've had enough of not being your own person. you aren't a division of him, your husband, nor the women he sleeps with when he's bored of you.

your hero

missin' you

friendly neighborhood spiderman, huh? you wouldn’t have expected your new dorky nerd best friend to be passing in the shadows of the charming hero behind the mask, hanging upside down and staring at you with odd interest. why does he seem oddly familiar? + marching band au

a bad history makes for a wonderful future, right? you're willing to forgive and forget for the man you've always been down bad for.

skin out of stone

he frees you from the confines of the Earth you were born, yet your feet grace the same ground that his does. he pays you an homage, and doesn't expect your reaction to be so... grateful.

puffs <- less than a thousand words <3

random ambulance leon x reader

just one more day, yeah? (vendetta leon smut)

collections <- series of puffs set in one universe

the rookie au

what more will the wind whisper?

stick around to find out...

[daytaker]

The Boys Roleplay As Themselves

mammoney: (This is a CLOSED scenario for me and my bros! Y'all can read it if you want to though. I'm gonna kick things off! @Lucifer @L3V1 @stn @AsmoBaby @Beelzeburger @Belphie) 8 ♡ DDSimeon and 7 others

mammoney:  It was 11 PM, and the Devildom was sparkling. Thousands of demons were lined up outside the hottest club south of Antarctica: Mammonteque. At the front of the line stood six of the most powerful, most intimidating, and most attractive demons you’ve ever seen, and even though the club didn’t open until midnight, the bouncer stepped aside and let them in.

“What? That’s so unfair!” shouted the demon behind them. 

But the bouncer shook his head, unmoved. “Orders from the top,” he said. Then, smirking, he added, “Clearly you didn’t recognize those guys. Must be embarrassing for you.”

Inside the club, the demons, who were all dressed in suits with boas, sunglasses, and fedoras, looked around. Just as they expected, this place was opulence itself. Golden fountains spouting gold-flake infused water. A gold disco ball hanging from the ceiling. Even the floor was made of intricately carved gold tiles.

“Obviously, Mammon is even wealthier than last time we stopped by,” said the oldest demon, looking around over his sunglasses. He quickly put them back on because the glow from the gold was too intense for him to handle.

“Wow, I never would have guessed Mammon would be as good at interior design as I am, but he proved me wrong!” said another of the demons. He was wearing heart-shaped sunglasses and a bright pink feather boa, and his fedora was covered in sequins.

Another of the demons was already stuffing his face at the buffet. Luckily, the wily Mammon had seen this coming and installed a machine that pumped out an unlimited supply of cheeseburgers.

“Seeing how successful Mammon is makes me proud to have him for a big brother,” said a demon with blue hair and a Ruri-chan body pillow.

“And speak of the devil,” the oldest said, smiling as he looked over at the entrance. 

A stretch-limousine painted gold pulled up to the front of the club. Demons began to scream and cheer as the door opened. Out stepped Mammon, who looked even more handsome than usual. You-Know-Who was clinging to his arm, staring up at him like he was the greatest being in all three worlds.  6 ♡ AsmoBaby and 5 others

stn: As Mammon approached the entrance to his club, the six demons in attendance greeted him with the coolness one might expect from Hell’s most corrupt oligarchs. The identities of these demons were as follows:

Lucifer: former angel, Avatar of Pride, traitor to the Celestial Realm, now the right-hand demon to and a massive simp for Diavolo: former ruler of the Devildom; magnanimous and crafty, with a tendency to act far stupider than he truly is Leviathan: gamer, miserable to be out in public, suffering a migraine and angry that he’s missing the latest episode of his favorite magical girl anime Asmodeus: party devil, narcissist, and self-proclaimed cutest demon in the Devildom Beelzebub: gluttonous gym rat with a heart of gold and a stomach of lead, and Belphegor: who was asleep.

Mammon himself was the Avatar of Greed, and as such, he lacked any ability to control his need to amass material wealth. This being the case, he had recently upset the political order of the Devildom with a massive coup, ousting the far more competent Diavolo from autocratic power in favor of the corrupt cabal now gathered together in this gaudy anteroom.

Mammon looked at his guests while You-Know-Who wandered off, searching for somewhere, anywhere, that didn’t hurt to look at.

“Somebody’s missin’,” observed the club owner.

“A very astute observation, Young Master,” said Mammon’s butler, Barbatos, condescendingly. He had come with the deed to the Demon Lord’s castle. “You may have forgotten, but your dear brother Satan declined your offer to participate in your sham of a government, citing the proven incompetence of yourself and your brothers as the reason.”

“Oh, right,” Mammon said with chagrin. “Damn that Satan, always stickin’ to his principles instead of sellin’ out like the rest of us clowns. Hey, where’d You-Know-Who go?”

“Ah,” said Barbatos with the nod of a man forced to act as the bearer of bad news. “That noble personage appears to have fled. It seems your company became too odious to tolerate.”

“That can only mean one thing,” Mammon said, his eyes widening as the realization struck him. “You-Know-Who ran off to find Satan, since he’s obviously the better catch.” 2 ♡ LordDiavolo and Belphie

L3V1: Or so he thought. Little did Mammon realize that You-Know-Who wasn’t remotely interested in Satan. Instead, the unassuming third-born got a message on his DDD. Stealing away from the crowd, he opened up the text. It read:

“Levi, I think you know who this is. I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long. But you know it was always you. Come find me where we shared our first kiss.”

mammoney: (What the hell do you mean your first kiss???) 4 ♡ Belphie and 3 others

L3V1: (I didn’t interrupt you, asshole!)

Levi gripped his DDD with newfound resolve. He had no interest in the political machinations of his brothers and Diavolo. That part of the plot was boring and honestly too high stakes for what was supposed to be a story about a nightclub. So, slipping away from the others, Levi sneaked out through the back exit and ran for the field of flowers where he and You-Know-Who had shared a few stolen moments of tenderness. 1 ♡ LordDiavolo

Belphie: Poor Levi. He didn’t even realize that the text was sent by Solomon, who was out to troll him. As Leviathan ran off to meet with his only true love (the bitter feeling of disappointment), the youngest of the brothers yawned and looked around, assessing the situation. 

He was at a luxurious club, owned and operated by his scummy brother Mammon. He was in the company of his brothers, minus Satan and now Levi, and Diavolo and Barbatos were there too. You-Know-Who might have been there for a minute or two, but they were long gone by now, and there were hundreds of screaming demons in line, hoping for entrance to the club.

“Maybe we should have our political talks somewhere less noisy,” Belphie suggested. It was a very reasonable suggestion, so none of the other demons could really argue with him.

The seven demons piled into the golden limo outside the entrance and drove away to a less obnoxious scene. 2 ♡ stn and Beelzeburger

AsmoBaby: Except, oh no!!! The limo ran over a bunch of tacks and the tires deflated before they could get very far from the club! They had no choice but to come back. Besides, Asmodeus hadn’t gotten the chance to greet the crowds, and who knows what kind of chaos it would cause if the people learned their idol had left without offering them so much as a wave and heart fingers?

“Asmo! Asmo! Asmo!” chanted the crowd as the demons climbed back out of the limo.

“Hello, everyone!” cried Asmo with an adorable grin, waving back to the demons. They cheered more wildly than ever! Some of them even fainted when he made heart fingers. Demons all over were pulling out their DDDs and snapping photos of the most beautiful demon to ever walk the streets of hell. 2 ♡ LordDiavolo and mammoney

Beelzeburger: Beelzebub was still eating at the unlimited cheeseburger machine. He was enjoying himself. Every time I swallowed a cheeseburger, another one appeared in my hands and I ate that one too. They had relish and pickles and tomatoes and onions and mustard and ketchup on them, and I drooled just thinking about it. But not for long, because I didn’t have to think about it for more than a second or two before another cheeseburger materialized in my hands. I kept eating the cheeseburgers for the rest of the night and well into the morning. 1 ♡ Belphie

mammoney: (Beel, this was supposed to be in the third person!) 1 ♡ L3V1

Beelzeburger: (Oh, right. Sorry. I got a little caught up in my character.) 1 ♡ Belphie

monSOLO: After pulling that prank on Levi, Solomon met up with You-Know-Who at their planned rendezvous point. 

“It looks like the Devildom is entering some pretty politically tumultuous waters,” Solomon said with a chuckle. “Perhaps we’d be better off returning to the human world for the time being.”

Having agreed to this, Solomon and You-Know-Who clasped hands and vanished from the Devildom for at least the next six months or so.

mammoney: (??? What? This was a brothers only event!)

monSOLO: :) 

mammoney: (I’m retconning that whole bit. Somebody else go while I figure out how to delete it.) 1 ♡ stn

stn: Meanwhile, at the House of Lamentation…

Satan assessed the political machinations of his brothers as logically as he could. He knew that Mammon had no real interest in power; he wanted the glamor, not the responsibility. So who could possibly be the mastermind behind the acquisition of power by the second born?

It was all too obvious.

Lucifer had been playing everyone for fools–the contract lawyers of the Devildom, his brothers, even Lord Diavolo himself. Only Satan, ever wary of Lucifer’s intentions, was able to see past his lies.

Gathering together the power of all thirty-nine of his cat familiars, Satan stood at the window facing the Mammonteque club and uttered a curse so foul and forbidden that I dare not repeat it here. And at the nightclub several miles away, Lucifer dropped to the ground, an empty husk. 2 ♡ Belphie and L3V1

Belphie: “Lucifer, no!” cried Diavolo. Giant tears flooded down his face as he clutched the body of his beloved advisor and probable traitor.

“Rip,” said Levi, who had returned to the club after realizing no one was waiting for him at the field of flowers. “Rest in pieces, big bro.”

“Who could have done this?” sobbed Lord Diavolo.

“I have no idea,” said Belphie, who had an idea. But he wasn’t about to sell out his fellow Anti-Luciferian. 2 ♡ Beelzeburger and stn

Lucifer: How long do you intend to embarrass yourselves like this?

AsmoBaby: (OOC comments are in brackets, Lucifer~) 3 ♡ Belphie and 2 others

Lucifer:  Why have I been killed off after being implicated as the mastermind behind a coup to remove Lord Diavolo from power?

Belphie:  (¯\_(ツ)_/¯) 2 ♡ stn and monSOLO

stn: (I didn’t realize creativity was forbidden in this home.)

stn: (I suppose it’s my own fault for not assuming my writing would face unfair censorship.) 1 ♡ AsmoBaby

mammoney: (Okay, listen, I’ve been real tolerant of you all bunglin’ around and makin’ this whole damn activity a laughing stock, EVEN after I went out of my way to make all your characters look cool, but Lucifer, are you really gonna torch this whole thing just because of somethin’ like that?) 4 ♡ L3V1 and 3 others

Lucifer: A one month ban from Devilgram for all of you seems like a reasonable punishment. 1 ♡ monSOLO

Belphie: Are you serious?

AsmoBaby: This is so unfair! I didn’t even write any of the seditious stuff! 1 ♡ Beelzeburger

L3V1: Lmao I hate this family… 3 ♡ stn and 2 others

stn: @Belphie, would you meet me in the observatory? I have something I’d like to discuss with you. 1 ♡ Belphie

Lucifer: If I catch any of you on Devilgram within the next thirty days, I will suspend your account indefinitely. @mammoney @L3V1 @stn @AsmoBaby @Beelzeburger @Belphie 1 ♡ monSOLO

LordDiavolo: What a shame. I was enjoying the story.

(Cross-posted on AO3.)

[loveandpeaceanddoughnuts]

excerpt from the first chapter of my slow burn Vashwood romance, Like Real People Do [regularly updating on ao3!]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The problem was that Wolfwood was in love. Hopelessly, stupidly, pathetically in love with Vash the Stampede. It hadn’t started out that way, of course. Did it ever? All he knew was that somewhere between July and whatever godforsaken town they found themselves in now, he had fallen hard.

The blonde had ridiculous ideals, a bottomless stomach, simultaneously the best aim and the worst clumsiness of any man he’d ever met. He was brave and reckless and foolish and brilliant, and he was utterly out of reach. Wolfwood didn’t suppose that Vash had even considered the possibility that he was anything but a traveling companion, a sidekick. Not maliciously, of course. He figured Vash cared for him about as much as he cared about anyone, that being far too much. But Vash cared about him like a puppy, or a very reliable gun. Wolfwood loved Vash like the sun, like an angel. Like a man.

Tonight, Vash opened a nondescript door in a nondescript lodging house and flipped a smile over his shoulder at Wolfwood. “Only one bed, preacher man.”

Wolfwood looked him up and down. “You don’t usually complain, needle.”

Vash laughed and flounced in, sprawling on the bed with a puff of dust. “I’m still not, don’t worry. Dontcha wish you could bring a girl back or somethin’ though? Must get old havin’ to share with me.”

Wolfwood looked intently at his cigarette. “Sure. But I wouldn’t want ya to get lonely. Not my fault you always strike out.”

Vash pouted. “C’mon, they just don’t know what they’re missin’!” He put on an exaggerated baritone voice. “The six million double dollar man, the Humanoid Typhoon, the peace-loving gunman! Ladies can’t help swooning for me!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Wolfwood smirked. “Just lemme know before you kick me out for your conquests, huh?”

Vash nodded earnestly. “Of course! I’m not a jerk.”

“Tell that to the girls next time.”

Vash sat up on the bed, a hand pressed dramatically to his chest. “You wound me, Nicholas.”

Wolfwood rolled his eyes. “C’mon. You definitely won’t have any luck if we don’t head downstairs before closin’ time.” He hefted the Punisher on his shoulder and sucked in another lungful of smoke.

Vash posed in the room’s cracked mirror, making sure his hair was spiked up as high as possible. “Alright, alright. Let’s go!”

Wolfwood claimed a table in the corner and got to work building a cloud of smoke around himself. Vash leaned on the bar, his red coat fanning out as he gave a megawatt smile to the girl behind the counter. “Two beers please, gorgeous!”

Wolfwood shook his head with something like fondness. Vash always came on too strong. He’d likely be picking up the pieces of the blonde’s broken heart later tonight, but he wouldn’t complain. At least he got to hold something of his.

Vash stumbled his way to Wolfwood’s table a few minutes later, waving a hand to disperse the smoke. “I was cultivating an aura over here,” Wolfwood groused.

“How is anyone gonna see us like that?” He slid Wolfwood a beer. “Here, make this last, alright?” Wolfwood stared into the bottom of his glass as Vash leaned his toned forearms on the table. “I think the bartender girl likes me,” he grinned.

Wolfwood snorted. “Ya mean she didn’t slap you yet?”

“Heyyy they don’t all do that!” Vash whined.

“Whatever you say, blondie. Ya gonna kick me out of the room then? Give a man time to find other arrangements, would ya?

“Nah, it’s not like that. Not yet, anyway. Besides, I don’t wanna get locked down too fast. The night is young!”

“Whatever you have to tell yourself.” Wolfwood pretended not to notice Vash’s failed attempts to wink at the bartender, who was conspicuously avoiding any glimpses toward their table. Eventually the gunman tired himself out and slumped on the tabletop, defeated.

“Maybe I read the situation wrong somehow, Wolfwood. Ya think that’s possible?”

He blew a slow stream of smoke to the ceiling. “It’s not impossible.”

“Awww man! She probably thinks I’m ridiculous.”

Wolfwood stared at Vash long enough that the blonde started to blush. His voice was uncharacteristically soft. “Who cares what she thinks.”

“Hah, yeah. I guess so.” Wolfwood couldn’t take his eyes off the soft pink that dusted Vash’s cheeks, the way it crept down his neck and reached the tips of his ears. It made him dizzy, reckless.

“No really, who cares what she thinks? Anyone would be lucky to be with you, Vash.” The words were out before he could swallow them, and Wolfwood briefly considered drowning himself in his beer.

“Gee thanks, Wolfwood. Guess it’ll be another cozy night for us, then. At least till someone realizes my worth.” Sarcasm lingered on the last word, like he didn’t quite believe it.

The cigarette suddenly felt like it was burning Wolfwood’s lips. He stubbed it out hard on the table, willing the awkwardness to dispel with the smoke. “Well. I’m gonna call it early. Good luck down here.” The priest was up and gone before Vash could protest.

As soon as he disappeared upstairs, Vash slumped down his seat. Why did he always do this? That would’ve been such a good opening, he thought miserably. When was Wolfwood going to realize?

The familiar doubt that haunted Vash reared its head. Wolfwood was never going to realize, because he would never think of him like that. Could never want him like that . Vash wasn’t even human, just a battered, alien thing.

He picked up Wolfwood’s discarded cigarette in shaking fingers and pressed the end to his lips. The paper was cold and damp with Wolfwood’s spit, but the core was still warm. Vash sucked it softly, the acrid burn in the back of his throat like a penance.

[my-chaos-radio]

Release: May 1, 1976

Lyrics:

Heaven must be missin' an angel

Missin' one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now

(Your love is heavenly, baby

Heavenly to me, baby)

Your kiss, ah, filled with tenderness

I want all I can get of your sexiness

Showers, your love comes in showers

And every hour of the hour

You let me feel your loving power

There's a rainbow over my shoulder

When you came, my cup runneth over

You gave me your heavenly love

And if one night you hear crying from above

It's 'cause heaven must be missin' an angel

Missin' one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now

(Your love is heavenly, baby

Heavenly to me, baby)

Oh, heaven (heaven)

Ooh, heaven (heaven)

Ooh, heaven (heaven)

Heaven (heaven)

Ooh I'm captured by your spell

You're different, girl, I can tell

When you're layin' on my pillow, baby

Above your pretty head, there's a halo, that's why I know

Heaven must be missin' an angel

Missin' one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now (Mmm ha)

(Your love is heavenly, baby

Heavenly to me, baby) Ooh my sweet little angel (Heaven)

My pretty little angel (Heaven)

I love you, love you, love you,

Love you, love you, baby, say right now

(Heaven)

Aah heaven

Must be missing an angel

(Heaven, heaven)

Missing one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now (Heaven, heaven)

Oh, my heaven (Heaven)

Missin' an angel (Heaven)

You must have slipped away along the Milky Way

It's 'cause (your kiss) your kiss (is filled with tenderness)

You came C.O.D. on a moonbeam straight to me

Just like showers, showers (showers showers showers)

Your heavenly power gets stronger by the hour

(Heaven must be missin' an angel)

I'm captured by your spell, oh, girl, can't you tell

Ooh ooh

(Heaven, heaven) Ooh ooh

(Heaven, heaven) Ooh

Songwriter:

Ooh so-so good, so-so good, so-so good, baby, mmm

Yeah

I love the way you move, I love the way you groove

Uh

Just like heaven, oh, baby

Heaven, yeah

(Heaven, heaven)

Heaven (heaven)

Ooh, my heaven (heaven)

Ooh, you're lookin' so good (heaven)

Oh, baby, I got to have my love, yeah (Heaven, heaven)

Need it bad, Lord, baby, yeah

I got to have my love, yeah (Heaven)

Goin' to hold you, shake it down

Gonna shake it down, shake it right down the joint...

Frederick J. Perren / Keni St. Lewis

SongFacts:

👉📖

Homepage:

Tavares

[luminouslotuses]

q!jaiden song dump………there’s a lot

anxieties (out of time) - the regrettes

what can i, what can i do? / can somebody give me a damn clue? / fear on my body like glue / can’t move, i can’t move, i can’t move / what can i, what can i say? / tellin’ myself that i’m okay / colors come after the rain

all of these anxieties / come over me, just let me breathe / are we just forever runnin’ out of time? / missin’ how it feels to really be alive / knock me down-down, up, back down / knock me down, i won’t back down

paint - the paper kites

this house has never been the same as before / it’s never felt warm, never felt warm / there’s something moving through the windows and walls / i’ve seen it before, seen it before / you left me living with a lingering soul / how little you know, how little you know

see where i am is where i’m wanting to be / i know what i need, know what i need / and there are many different places to see / i know how to dream, know how to dream / still there’s a wound and i’m moving slow / though it don’t show, though it don’t show

12345 - em beihold

and my neighbors’ screams are deafenin’ / so i’ve got the music blastin’ / feel the skin, the floor / the matches light the candle / hope it passes, smell the / one plant i can’t believe i kept alive / this must be what victory tastes like

instead of findin’ purpose / i could just sell insurance / or join a pyramid scheme / whatever the hell that means, oh / “you need a hug, are you alright?” / “nobody’s loved you much tonight” / only the mirror tells me i’m fine

before the line - dodie

i have an entire post on this one :]

not strong enough - boygenius

black hole opened in the kitchen / every clock’s a different time / it would only take the energy to fix it / i don’t know why i am

the way i am / not strong enough to be your man / i lied, i am / just lowering your expectations / half a mind that keeps the other second-guessing / close my eyes and count

there’s something in the static / i think i’ve been having revelations / coming to in the front seat, nearly empty / skip the exit to our old street and go home / go home alone

happy - mitski

happy came to visit me, he bought cookies on the way / i poured him tea, and he told me, “it’ll all be okay” / well, i told him i’d do anything to have him stay with me

i was in the bathroom, i didn’t hear him leave / i locked the door behind him, and i turned around to see / ooh, all the cookie wrappers and the empty cups of tea / well, i sighed and mumbled to myself, “again, i have to clean” / i sighed and mumbled to myself

and when you go, take this heart / i’ll make no more use of it when there’s no more you / and if you’re going, take the moon / then, maybe i will see you; in the night, i’ll see you

body and mind - girl in red

i’ve been in the deep end since i realized / there is a difference between body and mind / i’ve been at my lowest for the longest time / knowing my existence is not one of a kind

but i’ve had / my deepest cries for now / my heart’s out / my guard’s down

making the bed - olivia rodrigo

they’re changin’ my machinery, and i just let it happen / i got the things i wanted, it’s just not what i imagined

push away all the people who know me the best / but it’s me who’s been makin’ the bed / i’m so tired of being the girl that i am / every good thing has turned into something i dread / and i’m playin’ the victim so well in my head / but it’s me who’s been makin’ the bed

$20 - boygenius

pushing flowers that come up into the front of a shotgun / so many hills to die on

(take a break, make your escape) / gas, out of time, out of money / you’re doing what you can, just makin’ it run / (there’s only so much i can)

wait on me, i’m not ready / i still have to change, have to change, have to change

snow angel - reneé rapp

first to arrive, last to leave / what’s misery without company? / it’s hard to laugh when it’s hard to breathe

smiles hide what secrets keep / can’t tell a lie if you never speak / look in the mirror, she looks like me / but half-alive and twice as weak

if it kills me, i tried / if it kills me, i

[meatymidnightmultiverse]

Hey, Tina! Hit me with a flirt

"Heaven must be missin' an angel if yer around, darlin'~"

[melye1981]

Something I’m working on... A new song... Not done yet...

Months have gone by, can’t seem to dry my saddened eyes,

Some days, I just start missin’ you bad, then I go to sit n cry,

Why, oh why, must everything be so damn hard in my life,

I’ve been through so much strife, am I ok, nah, but I pretend to be,

On the outside, I seem normal as can be, inside everything is killin’ me,

What the fuck, does life not want me anymore, or have I really fucked up,

I’m fucked up in the head, and the beats have been so dead, but sometimes I see red,

I feel like I’m drowning in my own sorrow, I try to look past that, but here comes tomorrow,

To wake me up again, and remind me of the pain, sometimes I don’t even feel like I’m sane,

Outside my head is a lot of sunshine, inside my heart, there’s thunder and pouring rain,

Days and weeks go by, and my thoughts are in space, my mind is in a daze,

I’m still trying to accept the reality, and reality is, that never again will I see your face,

But mother of mine, you dear, angelic soul, no other mom could ever take your place,

When you were here, my heart felt so whole, why’d you have to go?

It wasn’t really fair how you died, I already know, it put a dent in my soul,

This living without you is new, and I’ll be honest, ma, it really fuckin’ sucks,

Aww shucks, I wish you were here to hear me sing again, to hear me rap again,

To tell me how beautiful my voice is, tell me I should audition for The Voice,

Cause you knew I’d probably win, but even if I don’t, I’m a champion in the end,

Nobody knew me quite like you did, you weren’t just my mom, you were my best friend...

[makeste]

literally just a giant post of Bakugou faces.

today, 4/20 (actually it is very much still only 4/19 over here, but to heck with it, we’re getting an early start dammit), is Bakugou Katsuki’s birthday. and as someone who loves Bakugou and who also hasn’t found much worth rejoicing about in April 2020 in general, it’s important to me to celebrate the shit out of this day. but these are strange times and I am le tired, and so what my tired brain ended up arriving at was “just do a post about how much you love his stupid face.”

so these are my favorite Bakugou faces. I stopped after Kacchan vs. Deku because this post was already like 100k words (slight exaggeration) with like 40,000 faces (slight), and because this already took forever and the next 130-something chapters were only going to have about one fifth as many good faces compared to the first 120, even though there are some good ones there still to be sure. but anyway, so there are no spoilers here. 

happy birthday Kacchan, and happy birthday to Kacchan’s angsty side profile with his hair covering his eyes.

why I like it: he scured.

lol but seriously. because up until this point he’s just been a complete asshole. even after he gets grabbed by sludgeman, he’s all “AS IF I’D LET THIS MUDMAN TAKE MY BODY FOR HIMSELF”, and he’s all feral-looking, and at first you’re like “eh he’ll be fine.” but then along comes this panel to serve as our narrator saying “he was not fine.” because he really is not. and on the page before this too, you can see how tired and desperate his struggles are starting to get. and absolutely no one is trying to help him. and he’s fighting, he’s straining, but he can’t. fucking. breathe.

and then this panel. and he’s just a kid. he looks so very, very young here, like this is the youngest he looks throughout the entire series except for in his flashbacks, and it’s because all the pride and bluster and anger are stripped away and he’s just a boy underneath it and he’s scared. “you looked like you needed saving.” exactly. exactly. and for Katsuki to actually ask for help is so rare. so you know that when he does ask (and he absolutely was begging for someone to come help him even though he couldn’t vocalize it. credit to Horikoshi for conveying all of that emotion in a single panel), he really, really needs it. thankfully there was one person watching who finally snapped himself out of that “a hero’s bound to come along soon” mindset that had everyone else gripped, and realized that he needed to be that hero.

why I like it: because he’s humiliated and fairly shaken up and also the most handsome he’s looked up until this point, but most of all he’s just chewing his lip and being all “god fucking dammit did fucking Deku really just save me, fuck my life, why is the universe fucking dumb.” like even after this hugely traumatizing experience, he’s incredibly resilient to the point where after he calms down, his lingering emotions are mainly just “smdh this is a new level of irritated even for me.” he is so brave and thickheaded and tough and absurdly, ridiculously petty jesus christ.

why I like it: like the old man said. his face just screams “I’m a rotten thief.”

there’s so much personality in this one expression. and then it’s juxtaposed against proto!Katsuki who I really desperately just want to punch in the face. just. my son my be a dick, but by god he’s an honest dick.

why I like it: baby?? cute baby??? mine?? my baby?!?

he’s just like. “I got it all figured out. gosh I’m so good at life.” that is the face of a child who has never encountered a single difficulty in his very young existence. everything is easy and he expects to be good at everything and he always is and he’s so, so pleased with himself. with a kid that little you really don’t want to go and shatter their dreams just yet, but maybe someone should have taken him down just a peg or two before it all got out of hand. alas. he was so cute that nobody wanted to and I can’t even blame them because he’s just that fucking cute, though.

why I like it: this is a very underrated panel which I think most people probably don’t even recall. it’s from chapter 11 just after he loses to Deku and Iida, and specifically right after Momo just completely lays into him and explains in vivid detail exactly how stupid every single one of his decisions was lmao. and it’s like he’s just had his eyes opened. he talks about her speech later, too, so it clearly had an impact.

there is no pride here at all. initially when I was reading this, I thought he was still shell-shocked. but looking back at it, and knowing what I do now about his unexpected willingness to accept criticism (something I certainly wouldn’t have expected during my first readthrough of this chapter), I think this is also a genuine “!” face as he realizes that she’s completely fucking right. YOU DONE GOOFED SON. but it’s okay because he learned from it!

also look how big his eyes are. when they get all wide like that. it’s so rare that I have to appreciate each and every time it happens. also he has no right to have such thick eyelashes. goddammit.

why I like it: because he’s strongest at his moment of weakness! because he’s upset but he learned from it! because he is such a strikingly human character with such complex emotions and there’s such a lovely mix of them on display here and that shit is my weakness! because this is when I signed the adoption papers (well, had them finalized after I initially obtained them after the “you looked like you needed saving” face in chapter 1, at least)!! because he always cries in front of Deku and doesn’t get embarrassed, but then he does get embarrassed if anyone else shows up! because his emotions around Deku are so raw and out of control! because the intensity of them is as compelling as it is confusing! but mostly because someone showing fierce determination while simultaneously showing intense vulnerability is basically the cheat code to unlocking my heart, and also the best thing anyone can ever draw in a shounen manga. thank you I’ll take infinity of them.

why I like it: because half of 1-A saw this face and instantly thought “fuck that’s hot” and then went “!! oh fuck me” but it was too late! that’s right kids. even knowing firsthand what a trashpile he can be, you’re still not immune to his charms. that confidence, though.

why I like it: the face of a boy who has just realized that holy shit, there are other people in his class. nothing gets past him. his reflexes are too fast.

why I like it: the slow motion (this is such a cool moment even if it’s at his expense lol), and the fact that this is such a weird and totally unique expression, and yet he somehow almost manages to make it look good. actually he does make it look good, let’s be real. of course, this was back when Horikoshi had more time to roll up his sleeves and really get into the art. look at all that shading goddamn.

why I like it: he cares!! he has feelings!! he has concern about someone other than him omfg whaaaaaat.

he’s so unsettled by what he just heard about Todoroki. the guy who was so strong and cool turned out to have an absolutely horrifying shounen protagonist past that he never let on about. honestly this scene is one of the reasons why I’m so strongly in favor of not interpreting Katsuki’s parents as abusive; because I just really like the character arc of him actually having a pretty good childhood, all things considered, but still having all these problems. because sometimes people actually do have everything going for them and yet they still screw up, because people are only human and sometimes you can fuck up (or be fucked up) even on easy mode! and if that happens it doesn’t mean you’re any more to blame, or more worthy of derision or scorn, or that you already had your chance so screw you, or any of that! anyway so that’s just such an interesting and relatively rare thing to explore and so I like it.

anyway. so just, the idea of him thinking of Todoroki as someone who had it made all his life, only to realize that’s not actually the case at all and that he’s actually the privileged one in comparison, just makes for a really great character-building moment. it’s a really big wake up call for him, especially given that he’s so often just wrapped up in himself and his own concerns still at this stage of the game. and it’s a moment that has a lasting impact on him and that he doesn’t forget, and it helps contribute to him starting to learn more empathy.

why I like it: my child is rabid please help.

but he’s so happy to have Ochako prove to be such an unexpectedly worthwhile opponent. she was sneaky and she nearly got him and he only just made it out by the skin of his teeth and fuck yes, that was awesome. he was really ready to throw down some more with her and it was gonna be the highlight of his fucking day. I just love seeing him acknowledge other people’s strength, because we know the value he places on being strong. so that’s a ton of respect from him, and Ochako fucking earned it, and this is just a great moment.

why I like it: just casually spittin facts and launching ships. nothing to see here move along.

why I like it: for everyone reblogging that one scene of shoujou!Bakugou from the anime over and over again, I just want to remind you all that as great as that scene is, we shouldn’t forget that in the manga he can be effortlessly handsome without even trying.

why I like it: as I said above.

why I like it: another one of the infamous “haah!?” faces. whenever he does these that one raised-eyebrow eye always goes so wide, and even though he’s trying to look like a pissed off thug it always makes him look surprisingly young instead.

also I’m not crazy for seriously wondering if Horikoshi’s art peaked all the way back in the sports festival arc though, right?? you honestly can’t find a bad panel even if you specifically go out and look for them.

why I like it: babyyyy.

I still don’t get how anyone could watch this scene and not get that he was way more upset than he was actually angry. he looks like he’s about to cry honestly.

why I like it: MY PRECIOUS SON’S ANGELIC SLEEPING FACE. all tuckered out. he’s had a hard day.

but seriously when you smooth out all of the >:O it is amazing how young he actually looks though. this one panel is shaded in such a way that you can see that he still has baby fat in his cheeks!! he’s just a little boy! HE IS A LITTLE CHILD LIKE THE REST OF THEM AND YOU MADE HIM PARTICIPATE IN THESE HUNGER GAMES AND HE KICKED ASS AND THEN GOT SAD AND YOU MADE HIM SLEEP AND CHAINED HIM TO A POST WHEN HE WOKE UP ANGRY AND TRYING TO BITE PEOPLE. anyways what a whirlwind of events huh.

why I like it: this child is literally trembling. he has been shaken to his very core. also for real though how did Jeanist even do that. anyways great internship or greatest internship.

why I like it: this is from chapter 60, right after he basically declares war on Deku and says he’ll crush him during final exams. then he turns around and is just like AND LET’S NOT FORGET THIS ASSHOLE HERE!!! and his eyes are practically bulging out and Todoroki just has his trademark “!!!” totally blank stare. this panel fully kills me guys.

why I like it: how was he THE CUTEST CHILD WHO EVER LIVED?? look at his little fists?! I can’t even deal with this???

why I like it: I actually like this one even more than the more iconic “the strongest heroes always win in the end” panel right below it, because in this panel you can more clearly see that he was crying quite a lot (he was only six!!), but it seems to me that it was more because of the unfairness of it than because he was hurt. even though he was hurt. but these jerks bumped into him and then acted like it was his fault, and it was two against one and he was much younger than them and IT’S JUST ROUGH YOU GUYS! LIFE IS HARD WHEN YOU’RE SIX! but he’s a little tough guy though so he scrubs the tears away in this very clumsy and boyish fashion because HE WON ANYWAY SO TAKE THAT! he is so little but already so determined.

why I like it: his eyes are just so intense all the time. even when it’s not an intense moment at all. also the dot shading here is so cool.

why I like it: okay so technically it’s the back of his head and not his face. but I feel like the fact that Kacchan was twitching and flinching and shaking too doesn’t get enough attention in this scene. he and Todo were both wigging out here and I love it. during the third light novel he also gets freaked out by the whole Disney Channel “we were telling a ghost story but now it seems like the story has come to life” plot that goes on at one point, just fyi. Kacchan is absolutely that kid who will refuse to watch scary movies just because “they’re dumb” and definitely NOT because he is scared, how fucking dare you sir.

why I like it: because this is the first of many scenes in this arc and the next arc in which he is freaking out but doing an excellent job of covering it up with his natural ferocity. he and Shouto have just come across one of their classmates’ arms lying in the middle of the path being chewed on by a villain in a straitjacket. his first reaction is to ask Shouto which of their classmates had been out on the path in front of them. he has immediately put two and two together, and he is immediately ready to throw hands with this dude, rules or no rules. but you can see the shading over his eyes though, and I think that -- along with the sweat visible on his face -- is a huge indicator of how horrifying this actually is to him.

why I like it: because this blank “processing...” expression that he sometimes gets when a lot of people are talking at once and he’s not really sure but he is pretty sure that he doesn’t like where this is heading, is my favorite.

why I like it: because even now it’s still ambiguous just what exactly was the prevailing emotion in these eyes and this expression, and the prevailing sentiment behind the “stay back.” I happen to think it was fear! not the same overwhelming, helpless fear as the 14-year-old who was caught up in the sludge, but a very on-edge, controlled-panic fear of a 16-year-old who’s trying to remain in control because he’s a hero in training now. and I think the “stay back” is the “stay back” of a boy who knows the look in that other boy’s eyes, and knows that it’s no use this time. it’s not protective, and it’s not hostile or defensive either. it’s just... resigned. don’t do it, Deku. that could have been the last thing he ever said to him, and it was measured and brave even through his fear and I love him so much.

why I like it: this is one which has to be viewed in juxtaposition with the panel immediately above it lol. Tomura looks like he could literally stare a man to death with those crazy eyes, and Kacchan is comparison just looks so ridiculously young and small and out of his league. but he doesn’t crack. but his eyes are super wide and even the shadows underneath them are stressed almost to their breaking point. like I’m screwed I’m screwed I’m so goddamn fucking screwed oh shit. my baby, guh. this was such a fucking scary experience though for real??

why I like it: same deal as above lol. this whole situation just keeps getting worse and worse, and here he’s just probing for more information while simultaneously trying to buy himself more time to think of a miracle plan. there really isn’t much chance of him getting out of here unscathed at this point (or at least there wouldn’t have been if the heroes hadn’t shown up), but I don’t think he’s letting himself think about that yet. but I’m sure it’s there at the back of his mind all the same.

why I like it: this is my favorite Bakugou face ever. SO MANY EMOTIONS. All Might came to save him! his hero!! he beat the bad guys (or so they think for that brief moment anyway) and it’s all okay now! he was alone but now he’s not anymore and All Might is there! and he is relieved, and he actually lets his guard down to show it for just a split second! his lip is trembling! I don’t think he even realizes for a moment, and then he does, and he immediately goes all tough guy again and the moment is gone! but while it’s there! it’s so much! I have never so badly wanted to hug a fictional character in my life.

why I like it: don’t you think this person could one day inspire thousands of others. do you see this courage in those eyes. the way he pushes past fear and panic and fatigue. don’t think, don’t doubt. just win.

why I like it: by now you have probably detected a pattern of me liking all of the Kamino faces because he was going through so many emotions that for once the walls just couldn’t keep up. he always looks so much younger when he’s not making >: faces. everything just smooths out. I also like that Horikoshi never makes his expressions symmetrical; he almost always has one eye wider than the other, eyebrows doing different things, stuff like that.

also this is when he sees All Might’s true form for the first time, and you can just see it hit him like a punch to the gut. All Might weakened; All Might weakened because of him; All Might might lose (!?!); All Might might die???? Katsuki’s entire world is falling apart in an instant, and in this moment he’s just a little boy.

why I like it: it beginsss. the angstening.

he’s not even resisting the hand guiding him. none of his usual unruliness or general aura of barely-checked rage. he just looks tired. and completely lost in his own thoughts. which as we now know were not good. I cannot fucking believe we had to wait another 25 chapters after this to finally get this kid a damn hug.

why I like it: because Bakugou Mitsuki is fulfilling my (and dating sim!Momo’s) lifelong dream of ruffling Bakugou Katsuki’s (spiky yet fluffy!!) hair. and all he can do is just chew his lip and halfheartedly glare at her all “mooooooOOOOmmm.” he doesn’t even really look pissed off here (because it’s hard to be mad when someone is talking about how worried they were about you and how relieved they are that you’re safe now, especially when that someone is your mom who isn’t normally the type to be so open about this kind of stuff at all), just begrudgingly grumpy. and I swear to god his bottom lip is made of fucking rubber the way he moves it around, just look at it.

why I like it: those eyelashes though!?!? [grabs Katsuki by the shoulders and shakes him roughly] WHY ARE YOUR EYES SO PRETTY.

why I like it: this is right after he found out he flunked the license exam, and you can see how upset he is. obviously we now know that shortly thereafter he went and had a complete meltdown. and buddy if you keep grinding your teeth like that, your dentist is also going to have a meltdown.

and yet again Horikoshi manages to strike this uncanny balance between making him look pissed off and making him look like he’s trying very, very hard not to cry. he just failed, again. it’s like the whole world is screaming at him over and over again that he’s not hero material at all.

why I like it: because he drags Deku out to the middle of nowhere and is all “I know you have All Might’s power and we’re gonna fight”, and Deku protests, and you expect Kacchan’s reaction to be just about anything other than what it actually is. this is as close to pleading as Katsuki is ever going to get. he may not be drowning in sludge but he is still desperate.

why I like it: this may be the best Katsuki that Horikoshi has ever drawn.

why I like it: super ultra mega unpopular opinion: I like this panel even more than THE PANEL!! that follows shortly after it. I am a sucker for when Horikoshi does this thing where he shows Katsuki’s face from a side profile, and his eyes are covered by his hair so you can’t see his full expression, but you know it is something vulnerable because he only ever does this when Katsuki is trying to hide his vulnerability. I could make a whole separate post just about these hair-covering-eyes faces lol. but out of all of them this is my absolute favorite. I can hear Okamoto’s voice acting in my head just looking at it.

why I like it: because it is THE PANEL. he finally broke completely; he let the walls fall away; he couldn’t hide it any longer. he’s so unbelievably torn up about this; he hates himself for it and feels like a failure; he’s lost and doesn’t have the faintest idea how to find his path again. he ended the Symbol of Peace. he was weak and wrong, and Deku was strong and right, and he can’t even hate Deku for it anymore, he just wants to understand what it is that he keeps doing wrong, why it is that he keeps failing.

why I like it: it’s, uuuuuh, angst.

lol it’s funny because at the beginning of the series, it was always Deku who was always crying at the drop of a hat. and to be fair this is still true. but Katsuki also cries way more than I would ever expect a rival character in a shounen manga to cry. and specifically he has cried every single time he’s had a dramatic and overly emotional altercation like this with Deku (and that’s three separate times now). is it because he’s always felt like he has less to hide around Deku? or because his Deku Emotions are so much more intense and volatile than his other emotions? at any rate, whatever it is, if this happens one more time (and I guarantee you it will too because A Certain Someone still hasn’t officially made an apology yet) he will officially lose all authority to ever call Deku out for being a crybaby again. meanwhile poor All Might will just be beside himself. I’m sorry dude, both of your children are just like this, you just gotta deal with it and accept their feelings.

why I like it: HE FINALLY GOT HIS HUG, BLESS.

and more hair covering his eyes! and chewing of the lip! and his head is bowed so much here, he fully allowed himself to be pulled into this hug and to accept this gesture of comfort for once in his life, just for a moment! after everything he was feeling, everything he was beating himself up over, All Might comes and tells him it’s not your fault. and there’s still so much guilt there, but he needs to hear this so badly that he accepts it all the same. meanwhile he is also CRYING AGAIN!? because this was the chapter where Horikoshi said “I am going to put all of the angst and cathartic conflict resolution into a single fight and it’s going to be the best thing ever” and it really was. do you even understand how much I love this. do you??

why I like it: OH GOSH I FORGOT ABOUT THIS, THIS IS MY OTHER FAVORITE KATSUKI HAIR-COVERING-EYES PANEL.

oh no. he’s ruffling his own spiky fluffy hair. he’s tired and he’s beat up (and whose fault is that lmao) and he’s learning all kinds of new things about himself today. he’s got basically nothing left in the tank, but for the first time in ages he has his path laid out in front of him again and he knows the way to start moving forward. he has been absolved of his guilt, the guilt which was eating a hole away inside of him. and all of a sudden he realizes -- it occurs to him -- hey, All Might finally admitted it, he really did give his power to Deku. but it’s still a secret though, isn’t it? it’s important, isn’t it? and so he tells them, hey, look, I get it, I won’t say anything, you don’t have to worry. it’s partially gratitude -- he owes so much to All Might and it’s ridiculous, that’s a fucking debt right there, and this is the least and only thing he can offer right now in return -- and it’s partially just... the right thing to do. like, common sense. honorable and shit. and it’s not like it’s a big deal or anything. but just, let them know.

I love his side profile so much and I love his hair and his ear and the scuffs on his face and his beaten up hand and his hunched up shoulders and him being soft and trying not to show how soft he’s being and he is precious.

BONUS:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY HANDS IN POCKETS GRUMPY TRIANGLE EYES ROVING FERAL HOG SON, I LOVE YOU.

[patcaps]

your love is heavenly, baby / heavenly to me, baby

hello i’m back with more patcap art!! i have missed drawing these two So Much <3

[holywitchkid]

Yas!!!! I found the bollocks!! *spins around like rupaul on her dragrace. Sashay you stay!

      “Fuuuck. That took five seconds for your tranny ass to wet your tea bagging ass tongue.”

[moneycheats]

heaven must be missin’ an angel 

also these: 

[summersun4youforever]

✨ Tag 9 people to learn more about their interests!

tagged by my fav @loulovehome thank you pu hope that this quells your curiosity! 

MUSIC

fav genre? not to be that person but i think i have a toe in most genres, i suppose my favorites have got to be anything taylor swift does, pop punk, r&b pop/new age r&b, and bluegrass

fav artist? again, not to be that person but i love so many artists! let’s do this based off of genre: taylor swift, 1D, 5sos, massive focus on ZAYN, the Avett brothers, and counting crows

fav song? fav song of all time (since i was young) is going to be come around by rhett miller but more currently i’d say you are in love by taylor swift and dRuNk by ZAYN

song currently stuck in your head? i have no idea how it got there but i have stressed out by 21 pilots stuck in my head??

5 fav lyrics? ok let’s do this kids. edit: this went in a “fav love song lyrics” way so sorry in advance.

1)  I hope that I don't sound to insane when I say / There is darkness all around us / I don't feel weak but I do need sometimes for her to protect me / And reconnect me to the beauty that I'm missin' (January Wedding - The Avett Brothers)

2)  Hands around my waist / You're counting up the hills across the sheets / And I'm a falling star / A glimmer lighting up these cotton streets / I admit I'm a bit of a fool for playing by the rules / But I've found my sweet escape when I'm alone with you (Disconnected - 5sos)

3)  This is the worthwhile fight / Love is a ruthless game / Unless you play it good and right / These are the hands of fate / You're my Achilles heel / This is the golden age of something good / And right and real (State of Grace - Taylor Swift) 

4)  What if I changed my mind / What if I said it's over / I been flying so long / Can't remember what it was like to be sober / What if I lost my lives? / What if I said "Game over"? / What if I forget my lies? / And I lose all my composure (Back to Life - ZAYN)

5)   I never said I was perfect / Or you don't deserve a good person to carry your baggage / I know a few girls that can handle it / I ain't that kind of chick, but I can call 'em for you if you want / I never said that you wasn't attractive / Your style and that beard, ooh, don't get me distracted / I'm tryna be patient, and patience takes practice / The fact is I'm leaving, so just let me have this (Jerome - Lizzo)

radio or your own playlist | solo artists or bands | pop or indie | loud or silent volume I slow or fast songs | music video or lyrics video | speakers or headset | riding a bus in silence or while listening to music | driving in silence or with radio on

BOOKS

fav book genre? murder mystery and young love!

fav writer? jane austen, lisa jewell, and rick riordan (nostalgia ok?!)

fav book? the way i used to be my amber smith, rebecca by daphane du maurier, and then she was gone OR watching you (both by Lisa Jewell)

fav book series? i guess the whole percy jackson situations? i have everything RR every wrote, and i liked it all but i havent touched the older ones in ages

comfort book? not one specifically but the nancy drew books

perfect book to read on a rainy day? bird summons by leila aboulela

5 quotes from your fav book that you know by heart? i hope i can name five...

1)  “The point is, life has to be endured, and lived. But how to live it is the problem.” “I am no traveller, you are my world.” (both are My Cousin Rachel by Daphne Du Maurier)

2)  “And I’m terrified he’ll see through the tough iceberg layer, and he’ll discover not a soft, sweet girl, but an ugly fucking disaster underneath.” (The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith)

3)  "I cannot make speeches, Emma," he soon resumed; and in a tone of such sincere, decided, intelligible tenderness as was tolerably convincing. "If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. But you know what I am. You hear nothing but truth from me. I have blamed you, and lectured you, and you have borne it as no other woman in England would have borne it. Bear with the truths I would tell you now, dearest Emma, as well as you have borne with them. The manner, perhaps, may have as little to recommend them. God knows, I have been a very indifferent lover. But you understand me. Yes, you see, you understand my feelings and will return them if you can. At present, I ask only to hear, once to hear your voice.” (Emma by Jane Austen) (sorry for the length, the shortened versions were not cutting it for me)

4)  “Read, read, read. That's all I can say.” (The Secret of the Old Clock by Carolyn Keene)

5)  “...amazing how boring you can get away with being when you’re pretty. No one seems to notice. When you’re pretty everyone just assumes you must have a great life. People are so short-sighted, sometimes. People are so stupid. I have a dark past and I have dark thoughts. I do dark things and I scare myself sometimes.” (Invisible Girl by Lisa Jewell)

hardcover or paperback | buy or rent | standalone novels or book series | ebook or physical copy | reading at night or during the day | reading at home or in nature | listening to music while reading or reading in silence | reading in order or reading the ending first | reliable or unreliable narrator | realism or fantasy | one or multiple POVS | judging by the covers or by the summary (im a very judgmental reader) | rereading or reading just once

TV AND MOVIES

fav tv/movie genre? i like dramedies, mockumentaries, and procedurals 

fav movie? ive got a massive list on my phone but ill pick Doob (No Bed of Roses) and 3-Iron as my favs for today

comfort movie? 2000s romcoms, im talking clueless, 13 going on 30, how to loe a guy in ten days, ten things i hate abt you, legally blonde

movie you watch every year? mamma mia and all listed in prev question

fav tv show? too many, currently im rewatching arrested development

comfort tv show? new girl

most rewatched tv show? new girl

ultimate otp? shawn and jules from psych (ultimate bc ive been watching since diapers literally)

5 fav characters? winston bishop, stiles stilinski, bellamy blake, clarke griffin, lydia martin

tv shows or movies | short seasons (8-13 episodes) or full seasons (22 episodes or more) | one episode a week or binging | one season or multiple seasons | one part or saga | half hour or one hour long episodes | subtitles on or off | rewatching or watching just once | downloads or watches online

super fun even though it took me an hour lmao, I'm tagging @technosoot @hometothecanyonmoon @sassylilnoodle @sushiniall @rosegold-thorns no pressure and sorry if youve already been tagged!

edit: i somehow managed to forget what i consider to be one of the greatest opening verses ever???? so bonus lyrics:

Step out the front door like a ghost into the fog / Where no one notices the contrast of white on white / And in between the moon and you / The angels get a better view / Of the crumbling difference between wrong and right (Round Here - Counting Crows)

[a-hazbin-spider]

“Annoyed, upset- they fall in th’ same crowd. Unless I’m missin somethin’? No? ‘Right. Ah but I s’pose I can knock that off. B’fore y’decide enough’s enough.” Aha- ha… hm.

Angel’s head ceased tilting one way in favor of doing it on the opposite side. “I mean… you did kinda look…” he pauses to mimic an angry face before turning slack again. “But you also sorta look like that jus’ about every time I see ya. Either you got resting bitch face on a whole nother level, or you must love seein’ me.” Best he can do is to have his voice drip with sarcasm when he explains. Doesn’t want Pentious to think he’s dumber than the serpent thinks he is. He’s certainly not stupid to buy the whole: he’s mean to you because he likes you, bullshit.

“You… think I’m gonna tell Cherri? About a watch? It’s a cool watch but, it doesn’t strike me as nothin Cherri could… use against ya? She’s doin’ somethin’ with decoys, looks a bit small scale fa her usual shit.” Is that assurance? Maybe. “Why? What’s wrong with th’ watch? Does it blow up or something if you enter a wrong passcode?”

❝ can i bum a smoke? i can trade you gum and pocket lint. ❞ Or/

❝ looks like you had a shitty night too. ❞

@a-hazbin-spider (for Pent or Vox if you like!)

The look that the serpent gave Angel at the question was nothing short of insulted, even disgusted, and he visibly looks the spider up and down for a few moments like he had just been asked to spit into his hand. After a moment later, however, he turns away, flicking his claws across the holographic screen of his pocket watch like had been moments prior. “…I don’t carry cigarettes on me. Or cigars. Or any of that dissssgusting chewing tobacco nonsense on me either, so, if you don’t mind, kindly take your pocket lint elssssewhere, Angel.”

[mrsarnasdelicious]

Heaven must be missin' an angel

Missin' one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now

[winterscaptain]

in harmony.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader

a/n: i’ve cast the choirs (because i think i’m hilarious) and have a playlist to listen to as you read, if you want the ~full experience~. i’ve done my best to time it out with the music so it flows properly, depending on how fast you read. the beginning moves a little faster than the music, so i would recommend starting the playlist at the beginning of the fic. this one has been living in my head rent free for way too long and i’m so stoked to share it with you.

straight no chaser as the nsa mc6 a cappella as the atf pentatonix as the fbi

words: 4035 warnings: mild swearing, internal monologuing, and pining!hotch ft. supportive!jj, tw: a capella themes setlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7GQkhBUhUfdJI4m0vZbqbJ?si=46TMCTj9SkCRoHlnAxHfkg

masterlist | requests closed!

The Official Unofficial Los Angeles Inter-Agency Choral Competition was in its final stages of preparation, and you were at the center of it. CIA did the judging, as usual, and each agency had a team, a setlist, and a competitive streak a mile long. 

Because the bragging rights awarded by the CIA were so coveted, the agents involved in the choral groups got a half day off of work, waived by the Assistant Directors themselves. 

Thus, the NSA, ATF, and FBI choral teams were goofing around in the federal building auditorium with the abandon of a bunch of high schoolers. Sound check was always criminally fun, and most of it was spent giving each other a hard time and arranging music on the fly. 

The engineers were still working and would still need a few minutes to themselves before you all got onstage and ran your sets. 

“Hey, Bureau.” 

You turned, finding Ben behind you in his black button-up and tie. “Hey, dumbass.” 

Ben was the arranger for the NSA team and your closest friend in Los Angeles. You got along famously, and you joked that the friendship between you was the only reason there was interagency cooperation in your jurisdiction at all. 

He was looking particularly sharp this afternoon, as the NSA team prided themselves on their polished performance aesthetic. 

“Ready for tonight?” He asked. 

You laughed. “God, am I ever. I’ve been working CT down in the bunker for weeks.” 

“Oh, dude that’s brutal. When was the last time you saw daylight?”

You blew air through your lips. “Ah, fuck, I dunno, like a week?”

Ben laughed and slung an arm around your shoulders. “This is a helluva way to get back into civilization with the rest of us.” 

You scoffed. “It’s bold to imply anyone at the NSA is a part of any society.” 

“C’mon. Trash talking doesn’t start until we’ve rehearsed at least once.” He jostled you, and you let out another peal of laughter. 

“Try me, hot shot.” 

Meanwhile, upstairs, the BAU was finishing up their goodbyes and case reports for the Los Angeles field office. There was a spree killer wreaking havoc in the Mid-City neighborhood, and the BAU was of enormous help in apprehending the suspect. 

You’d been in the aforementioned CT bunker for at least a week and had no idea your (greatly missed) former unit was on your side of the country, let alone in the same building.  

“Oh!” Agent Fitzgerald said, suddenly. The BAU looked up all at once, and it was almost comical. “I completely forgot. There’s an event tonight that’s always really fun. If you all aren’t in any rush to get back to Quantico, we’d love for you to stay. If you’re eager to get back, they’re in the auditorium right now for a dress rehearsal and it shouldn’t take more than a half hour.” 

JJ’s head tilted. “What’s going on?”

“The Official Unofficial Los Angeles Inter-Agency Choral Competition.” Fitzgerald grinned. “It’s really fun, surprisingly good, and never not hilarious.” 

Emily laughed. “You’re kidding.” 

“Not even a little.” 

+++

Ben and his team were in the middle of their set, and you were bopping along with some of the ATF guys in the corner. 

You couldn’t deny the talent on the NSA team. They were clean-cut, crisp, and well-arranged (thanks to Ben), but you couldn’t help but think they were a little too polished. 

Ben had the lock on comedic mashups, and had a great on-stage persona - one of the very few NSA agents with a sense of humor. He sang directly to you, much of the time, in rehearsal because he knew it made you laugh. His sense of humor was infused through all the arrangements, and the lyrics alone were enough to have you on the floor.

Their movie medley opener was your favorite, full of silly references and even a sing-along section. You knew all the words simply because you’d sat with Ben as he spent three days arranging and adjusting it a couple of months ago. Obviously, you offered absolutely no help because all you wanted was to watch him crash and burn. 

Maybe some sabotage could come in handy next time…

They rounded out their set with a clean-cut cover of Smash Mouth’s All Star. Ben was always in it for the laugh, and you loved it. Both teams in the house were laughing as the NSA made increasingly bigger spectacles of themselves. 

It was easier to forget how much you missed your family in Virginia when you were with the other teams - rehearsing and bonding and spending time together. There was no unit in Los Angeles like the BAU insofar as the bond between team members, but this event always mimicked it better than anything else. 

Without Ben, you’d barely have anyone at all. He happened to be assigned to you as a liaison between agencies on one of your first cases, and you got on like a house on fire. His friends became your friends, and you found your footing in your new home. They showed you the best beaches (Manhattan and Malibu), the best sushi (Enya), and perhaps most importantly - the best route and attack strategy for navigating the hell that was LAX. 

You avoided calling your old unit as much as possible, as you were sure it would keep you from fully settling down. If half of your head was in Virginia, you’d always hate Los Angeles. That said, Aaron was still the first number on your speed dial, and your thumb spent a fair amount of time hovering over it before inevitably shoving it back in your pocket. You’d done it just today, walking from your office to the auditorium. 

You left the ATF to their ridiculous devices, and joined your team in the house. 

“Doin’ alright? I heard it was a rough week for y’all down in CT.” Michael, a Texas native and an insane talent, could have been an excellent profiler if he wasn’t so great at ferreting out tax fraud. You both spoke in hushed tones, as to not disrupt the rehearsal. 

You nodded, patting him on the arm. “I’m alright.” 

“Missin’ home?” 

You nodded again. “Just a bit. It’s weird coming out into the world after being in the bunker - it’s almost like I don't remember where I am, and I almost expect to be somewhere else.”

He didn’t say anything, but leaned against you. It was a small gesture, but a meaningful one.

When NSA was finished, with their levels set and lights programmed, it was ATF’s turn to get up on stage and flutter around until they were adjusted. 

Michael said something ridiculous, and it made you laugh out loud. You slapped a hand over your mouth, hearing it resonate through the house as one of the floor mics picked it up.  

At the back of the auditorium, only minutes prior, Agent Fitzgerald had slipped in with the BAU. They all stood along the back wall, and you only would have seen them if you knew where to look. The auditorium was massive, and the only lights up were the lights onstage - distinguishable features were nearly impossible to determine from the distance. 

Aaron’s breath caught for a moment. A microphone picked up someone’s laugh near the stage, and it sounded startlingly like yours.  

Must be mistaken. There’s no way. 

As ATF started up, Ben grabbed you by the hand and pulled you to your feet. He turned you under his arm and led - dancing you around on the floor at the front of the stage. You laughed your way into his arms, and fell into a relaxed Lindy Hop. You took turns leading, throwing him under your arm just as many times as you ducked under his. 

Aaron’s thoughts wandered, the laugh he heard triggering something in him. He missed you greatly, but that was no secret. You two had started seeing each other, unbeknownst to the team, a little more than three months before your transfer. 

The team were too polite to tell you, but they knew something was going on from the get-go. Hotch was happier, and you were more effusive in all situations. You balanced each other well, and could bounce ideas and fight and communicate like nobody else in the unit. It was an asset more than anything, but when the transfer assignment came through, there was no negotiating. 

For all involved, you decided it was best to end things - or at least pause them - while you were stationed at the LA field office. It would be too hard, and you’d hate to hate him by the time you got back to Virginia for one reason or another. So, you were alone at the LA field office, while he stayed right were he was. 

Wait. The LA field office. 

He was jarred from his thoughts by JJ, who smiled and asked, “What’s their deal?” Her eyes were trained on the dancing couple on the house floor, out in front of the apron of the stage. 

“Oh those two are the only reason the FBI and NSA play nicely in the sandbox together. They’re two peas in a pod. They work counter-terrorism for their respective agencies, and have a knack for solving inter-departmental disputes.” 

“Are they together?” JJ’s question was light, but Hotch knew there were ulterior motives. Maybe she’d heard your laugh too, and refused to doubt. 

She was good at that - not doubting. Hotch, on the other hand, sucked at the whole faith thing. He found his skepticism was only getting worse with age, and he (in that very moment) decided to have a little more hope. 

“Oh, no, not at all. Ben doesn’t swing that way, and my understanding is that Agent L/N left someone back on the east coast and hasn’t been seeing anyone out here.” It was clear Agent Fitzgerald, a new import to the LA field office herself, had no idea you worked with the BAU prior to your transfer. 

Maybe you hadn’t talked about them at all. 

That thought sent a little unpleasant spike through Hotch’s chest. 

Hope. Hope. 

Maybe Fitzgerald just missed something, or didn’t know you too well. 

Hotch could feel Emily’s eyes on him, but continued watching the ATF runthrough. It was your laugh he heard. Ben threw you around with ease, and you both cut clean, sharp lines silhouetted against the stage lights. 

Then, of course, it was Emily’s turn to ask questions. “So how did this...tradition start?”

Fitzgerald shrugged. “It’s my understanding that it’s been happening for years, brought on by some ridiculous bet between ATF and FBI. Never ones to be outdone, the NSA inserted themselves, the CIA wanted a piece of action, and the rest is history.”

“Only in California,” said Dave with a laugh. 

As the songs changed, Aaron watched you tap out of the dance, sitting down heavily in one of the house seats and taking a few huge sips of water. Ben grabbed his water bottle from the floor and came to the row behind you, wrapping his arms around you from behind and resting his chin on your shoulder. 

Though he was just told Ben would not ever be into you in that way, Hotch couldn’t help the prickle of jealousy that snuck up his belly. JJ, beside him, stepped close to him and hooked her hand around his forearm, her thumb brushing circles against his suit jacket. 

“I’m alright,” he whispered. 

She squeezed once. “I know.” It sounded like she knew more than that, but Hotch let it go. While sometimes irritating, it was nice to have people around him that knew him so well. 

JJ continued to cling to his sleeve as the ATF transitioned to the FBI. 

It nearly startled him out of his skin to hear your voice echo through the house on a hand-held microphone. You stood on the edge of the stage, squinting at the booth at the back of the house. “Can we run full tech? We have AV that needs to be sequenced correctly.” 

A click, then a disembodied voice. “We’re ready for full AV.”

You shot a two fingered salute. “Thanks, team. Let’s bring up the seal for now and go from there.” 

The FBI seal and motto floated into focus on the fabric behind them, and Aaron felt himself almost lean forward in anticipation. He chanced a look down the line, and the rest of his team was smiling, waiting, watching. Just like he was. 

JJ bumped his shoulder.  

The stage was rather dark, but he could see all five of you lined up almost against the fabric. The song started quickly, with strong base and an uptempo beat. 

Your team ran to the front of the stage one by one, following the phrases of the music - fun and high energy. 

“I didn’t know…” Emily whispered to Derek, at a loss. He shrugged, still totally floored. You’d never joined them in their horrible karaoke spectacles, claiming the sanctity of your dignity, but Hotch realized now it was just to spare their feelings. 

You were incredible. Your eyes shone in the light, your smile flashing behind your microphone. It was obvious you were having a helluva time, and were close to your teammates. You played off each other easily, keeping pace without conducting, feeling the music and harmony in every cell of your body. Hotch saw your work ethic even in this - collaborative, but still taking charge. 

It was clear your team looked to you for tone and energy, and you delivered. With a start, Aaron realized he’d never heard this song before. He leaned forward and asked, “Are some of these originals?”

Fitzgerald nodded. “The FBI team has a few strong writers on it this year, so they were able to pull together a medley, an original, and the closer in about three weeks.” 

Hotch raised his eyebrows. “Wow. That’s impressive.” 

She laughed lightly. “You’re tellin’ me. I was in here one day when they were workshopping after hours and was blown away.” 

When you were finished with your first piece, you looked back to check the cyc - satisfied to find Home, arranged by Y/N L/N in gold, in the FBI font. 

“I’m gonna practice my little spiel here or I won’t get it tonight. I’ll count you off at the end, go on three, yeah?” 

Click. “Copy. Go for it,” came the disembodied voice once more. 

“When we were deciding which medley we wanted to use, we figured out there was nothing in our library that really spoke to us at that moment where we were. So, we wrote a new one. This one is called Home, and includes a bunch of songs that not only include the word ‘home,’ but ones that mean something to us or someone we love. 

“Home, to us, is where our families are. We all chose a series of pictures that represent home for us, the people we love. I hope you enjoy listening to this medley as much as we enjoyed writing it.” You flashed a winning smile before raising your hand, waiting a moment, and then dropping it, immediately starting to sing. 

The rest of your team fell in right away, stepping up to the mics and sinking into the arrangement. A figure jogged up the steps toward Hotch, and he latently realized it could only be Ben, his agile stride giving him away. 

He settled right beside Hotch, leaning against the wall. Needless to say, Aaron was confused. That is, until - 

“You’re Hotchner, aren’t you?”

Aaron kept his gaze trained on the stage. “Who’s asking?”

“Ben Collins, NSA. I would be a really shitty friend if I couldn’t recognize someone I’d seen in a framed photo on Y/N’s desk like 20 times.” 

With that, he gave Hotch a mock-salute and trotted back down the stairs. 

JJ furrowed her brow. “What was that about?”

“I have no idea,” Hotch admitted. “He knew me, though, from photos.” 

He felt, rather than saw, JJ’s smile as she bumped him with her shoulder. “Focus - You’re missing it.” 

He huffed a laugh, and tuned back in. 

Home was an undeniably fun medley, and the photos were heartwarming and strategically chosen to hide all faces except the agents’ on stage. Aaron smiled when he heard a line from one of his favorite songs. 

Our house Is a very very very fine house...

Just a brush, but it felt like your touch, your smile, reaching him. You took the next section with renewed energy, never falling into stillness as you drove the music forward. 

JJ clutched at Hotch’s sleeve, and he lifted his gaze from you to the cyc. On it, there were photos of Dave’s backyard, mixed in with what he only assumed were the pictures from your teammates’ homes and families. They were piling on top of each other, as if someone was throwing them into a pile, one by one. 

A photo of JJ, Emily, and Penelope flashed by, their backs to the camera. 

There was one of you, Jack’s face hidden in your neck as you smiled fondly at the person just to the left of the camera. Aaron recognized that image, but from a different angle. You’d been smiling at him, just next to Emily. 

Emily’s eyes strayed to Hotch. There was a look on his face she’d never seen before. She almost looked away, feeling like she was intruding on an intimate moment. Instead, she lightly smacked Derek’s shoulder, and he looked over too. 

“The separation has been hard on them both,” he said, his voice low. “Look.” He tipped his chin toward you. 

Your posture didn’t look any different to anyone who knew better, but Emily could see the slight sag in your shoulders, hear the small catch in your breath. The music affected you more than you’d care to admit. 

A photo came into view on the screen - one where you stared out the jet window with your chin in your hand, Hotch’s face pressed into your torso as he slept with his head in your lap. Your fingers were tangled in his thick dark hair, twirling absent-minded curls into the locks behind his ear. JJ smiled. She’d taken that one. It was soon covered with another, then another, then another. 

Agent Fitzgerald bid the team a quiet farewell and slipped out to take a phone call. Hotch barely noticed. She’d been on her phone most of the time, and had missed the photos. She was blissfully unaware of your connection to the team, and for that Hotch was grateful. It almost felt wrong to disrupt the little world you’d built here. 

They were almost done, preparing for the closer. 

Maybe he was biased, but Hotch felt your team was the strongest. 

NSA had the polish and that classic choral look and looked like they were having just the right amount of fun, but there was still that competitive edge that took some of the luster out of the performance. 

ATF were the most traditional of the group, all of their music recognizable, tightly arranged, and reminiscent of barbershop quartets. While entertaining, it was clear you and Ben stole the show with your dancing, the music taking a ready backseat to your antics. 

Your team had fun. There was no bite in it. You weren’t there to win, but rather just there for the sheer fun of it. Your music was yours, it meant something, and was more creatively arranged than the rest of them by a long shot. 

Aaron felt a rush of pride as he watched you shine. While he couldn’t articulate it, he could sense the same thing Derek noticed. There was something pulling at you - the same thing pulling at his shoulders and the corners of his mouth whenever he had fun without you. 

“Alright,” you said, just a little out of breath. You took the mic off the stand. “We have one last number, and we all sing it together.” You held the mic out to your left, and Ben took it from you. 

“This is our favorite, because it’s a really good excuse to think of the people we love.” 

Some agent (whose name always escaped you) from the ATF took the mic next. “Thanks for coming out tonight to watch our ridiculous annual competition, for bragging rights and honorary ownership of the City of Los Angeles.” 

Ben took the mic from him and passed it back to you. 

“I hope we all have someone in our life that we love so much it's difficult to articulate. I know I do.” 

JJ inhaled sharply as Hotch let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. You missed him. He could feel it. He wasn’t alone. 

You replaced the mic, and stepped back. With the FBI in the center, ATF to the right, and NSA to the left, you began. 

There’s a calm surrender To the rush of day When the heat of a rolling wave Can be turned away

It was a beautiful picture, all of you standing together as one united front. The sound was incredible - filling the space with sound that spun right into the chests of everyone listening. You stepped up with Ben and an ATF agent, standing close to the mic. 

Ben reached for your hand, knowing this one was hard for you. You’d probably never get a chance to have Hotch in the same room, feeling what you felt, singing this song. It was silly - a Disney song. But it always cracked you wide open. It was only ever for him. 

You took Ben’s hand and gripped it tight. It wasn’t performance, so you could really do whatever you wanted as long as sound and projections were able to do their work. 

The breakdown of the song was your favorite, and you threw your hands in the air, releasing Ben - the final lighting cue of the show. It was designed to bridge the gap between the players and the audience, bringing everyone together.

The house lights came on about halfway, and the BAU was visible from the stage, as they’d all crept forward during the set. Hotch could only imagine what that lighting effect would do when the house was full of agents and their families later tonight. A true communion, with the music and the people. 

Your eyes scanned the house, rehearsing your engagement pathway through the audience. A small cluster of people caught your attention, and Ben squeezed your hand. You looked over at him, still singing, and he gave a tiny toss of his head back to the group. 

Looking more carefully now, you saw your team. More specifically, you saw Aaron. 

He was watching you with a fond smile, and you knew he saw you clock his presence. JJ was on his arm, likely anchoring in him place and comforting him in only the way she could. 

Against your will, a broad smile pulled at your face, a shot of adrenaline pushing you into the finale. Your eyes were locked on his, the music only a footnote to two simple words running on loop in your head. 

He’s here he’s here he’s here he’s here.

The world for once In perfect harmony With all its living things. 

You hit the final chord and let it hang in the air for a moment. It felt like forever - the BAU burst into applause, Derek and Emily whistling and shouting - while you and Hotch just stared at each other across the house.

The connection was only broken when Ben yanked you back to rehearse bows, which took all of thirty seconds. You squinted at your friend when you stood straight again. He had a smug little smile on his face. 

“You knew,” you accused with absolutely no heat. 

Ben shrugged. “I investigated.” He shot you a wink as he said, “It’s what I do.” 

You rolled your eyes and shoved past him, nearly leaping down the steps into the house. You ran up the aisle, and Hotch was there to catch you, holding you close. 

“You’re here.” 

He kissed the side of your head. “Of course I’m here. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 

+++

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