#MI 4 watch partyyyy

[nyc-pizza-rat]

you know. it does confound one. these people do fully watch how the ambanis and the like dress right. like they see that. and then when they do have indian women in sarees and such in their movies, they're always wearing shit even your kamla aunty would not be caught dead in at a function. it does confound one I say!!!

[iwannawritepls]

Le Morte d’Arthur Thoughts P1

I’m lending Les Mis to a friend so here’s the first 10 chapters of Le Morte:

Book One

Chapter One

thats a really long chapter title wowzer

Cornwall has some really good folklore 

i should mention that i kinda knows what happens in these chapeters because i read teh first 7 about two years ago 

Boo come ‘round for dinner. Bring your wife :)

He wants to have sex with another mans wife oh nonono

Igraine is a good wife. Loyal wife. Guinevere’s foil…?

What is this logic? ‘If he doesn’t come round for dinner go to war with him?’ Whattt

The castle he’s in is…terrible…(the castle was called Terrabil)

He loves her so much that he’s sick

Or…or you’re just sick because this is medieval England and you drank some bad water?

‘You’re looking for Merlin? I’m Merlin!!’

Chapter Two

Another long title. I love that.

Gat Arthur. I love old English Oml

He didn’t ask what he wanted in return before he swore to give him anything he wanted? Rookie move.

What are you a fairy-tale witch?

Casual murder

…that’s kinda…ultra-violence...

3 hours after his death man Wowzer

Get thee to a nunnery!!!

Necromancy? Like...bringing the dead back? or necromancy like just magic?

Chapter Three

Toxic man

No hun you don’t have to sleep with him because he’s your husband

X to doubt

He’ll put his own kid aside and have his wife feed Arthur leaving Kay to be ignored…this is why Edmund was all bitter in King Lear

At least he didn’t say no to handing the kid over. It could’ve been worse

Chapter Four

Good. Get sick. I hate you.

And then and then and then and then

Good get sick again.

Let him dieeeee

His ghost just yeeted out of his body

Uther is dead at lasttttttt

Chapter Five

The archbishop of Canterbury (current) looks like that once science teacher who we all know was bullied in school and tried to be hip and down with the kids, but you just end up kinda hating him.

Was the sword was sent by god? Or by Merlin? Or what? Where did the sword come from? Did it just fall out of the sky like a meteor? The sword is actually a parasitic alien life form

God damn it Kay

Did nobody tell Arthur what this alien sword is?

That’s just bad planning. No knights guarding the sword when you said 10 would at all times? Really?

Parasite sword has found its host

‘He handled the sword by the handles’ good! Don’t handle a sword by the blade that’s how you lose fingers

Tom! New line for new speaker! At least use some damn speech marks I’m so confused

Oof imagine failing. I could pull the parasite sword out of the stone you just need to put salt on it. It’ll shrivel up like a leech

Chapter Six

Did Ector never figure out this Arthur was Uthers son? He got loads of stuff from uther right around the time that he got the baby and the baby was brought in a golden cloth and Oml like surely he knew!

Nobody: Ector: You’re adopted

Make my son one of the most important and influential positions in your court is all I ask

There’s a mix of Celtic and Christian holidays here. Candlemas and Christmas which is super interesting from a studying point of view because they’re coexisting and not clashing

Chapter six the chapter where Arthur pulls the sword out the anvil twelve thousand times

Ulfus lived!!

Chapter Seven

Even the poor are bored of watching Arthur pull the sword form the anvil

I’m glad to know that the rich have been self-serving throughout history. Like bacteria they scarcely evolve over time

What reason do you have to invade Scotland Arthur? What did the Scottish ever do to you?

What did Wales ever do to you. Next thing it’s gonna be Ireland.

Chapter Eight

The king of England lives in Wales nowwww (that’s just where he lives) this isn’t the Byzantine empire Arthur! Who do you think you are? Constantine?

That’s a threat

This reminds me of that scene from brave where they’re all racing each other on the boats to be the  first ones to land

Oof man rude. We won’t accept your gifts because you don’t have a beard!

what did Ireland do to you? Also was Tom a magician because he somehow knew England had all of them under their control for a hot minute

Whether they will or nill

Chapter Nine

Lot asks a question and Merlin Yeets out. Same tho

4 took on 300…Wowzer

Oh no. Not the horse. Whoops. I am so so very sad

His bling was so bright it blinded people

Skedadled

Chapter Ten

Oh he moved back to London cool cool

Wait I thought there were only 3 kings at war with him not 6

They’re bad barons then they can’t do the one thing they’re supposed to do

What are the rules for asking Merlin what to do? Why doesn’t everyone just ask Merlin? Like Arthur just asks him whenever so what are the rules?

Wow they’re getting help from the French???????? William the conqueror would be…not pleased tbh cus Normandy and France were not good friends for a hot minute

Did they just not know that there were kings outside of England?

What the fuck why are they about to get killed????

Oh that’s why

Smote what a great word

We want you to declare war on like 6 kings ‘that sounds like a reason to partyyyy’

Archbishops of Canterbury makes his return

Wow what a great time they must have had before going to war

[nyc-pizza-rat]

this movie is really funny agdhdkfkd