#Lucanis deserves peace

[partially-controlled-chaos]

Hey look I’m not going apologize in advance for using the same tropes in all my works because when I find something I like I run it into the ground and nothing has stopped me yet.

I’m going to find a traumatized character. I’m going to put them in soft situations. Their beloveds hands are gonna touch their face to soothe while they sleep. An index finger will trace the outer ear and the nose. I’m going to use the word gentle waaaayyyyy too many times. And then I’m going to throw in a mild hand kink.

And I’m very absolutely not sorry about it.

[vaguely-concerned]

so for obvious reasons, rye is not generally all that popular with most of the senior watchers. however. I think there is a certain type of younger watcher to whom he is The ultimate hot badboy icon and fantasy. (we're talking about a group of extreme indoor kid goth nerds who've barely been outside. it doesn't take a lot ot achieve bad boy status in this context and the only thing in this world that lasts forever is a bad reputation in a small insular group like the watchers.) it's SO funny because rye thinks of himself as such a disappointing fuckup of a son of the grand necropolis. and meanwhile there are novices kicking their feet and giggling as they're like

'Ingellvar is so cool. no one knows where he's from he was found down here as a baby. mysterious orphan appeal. he could be a secret dalish prince or something for all we know. (*annoyed extra nerd watcher novice voice*: umm actually the dalish don't have princes, merrivar?? read a real book sometime maybe???) he's a rebel. he doesn't care what the senior watchers think no time for politics he just gets the job done. (*small sad rye voice* I care a lot what the senior watchers think actually. a pathetic amount, in fact. it just rarely seems like it helps anything at all) I heard he graduated almost top of his class even though he spent all his time as a student partying up in the city and having a torrid affair with the son of a noble family. sometimes in his spare time he wears a cool punk leather jacket but like the fantasy version of that. he has tattoos apparently but no one's seen them for years. yuh-uh it's true too, I know someone who knows someone he dated once. they say he saw a knife fight once. like, in a bar brawl, with living people. all that, and he's even sneakily emotionally unavailable. *starry-eyed sigh* what a dreamboat'.

needless to say this only grows worse with the events of the game, after he takes out the formless one and rumours start to spread that he maybe killed a god or something too???? and this being nevarra, more importantly he's out there killing dragons with his sworn companions?? like a fucking fairytale prince but with that devil-may-care rebellious streak???? he's the safely unavailable first crush at a distance of many a young watcher. now imagine the reaction when he shows up home for the first time in a year after the war of the banners accompanied by The one true bad boy fantasy to rule them all: literally the sad brooding crown prince of the crows of antiva in leather pants who has WINGS and a dark tortured side of his nature that he has to constantly battle against for the sake of those he loves.

(the perception vs. reality situation for both of these characterizations is. so unspeakably hilarious needless to say. consider how much of the above lucanis characterization is accurate to the person he actually is and then you've basically found the level of distortion lens being applied to rye as well. is most of it technically true? sure. 'technically' is having to do a whole world of heavy lifting there tho fhdfska)

what I'm really saying here is that there is a subsection of this group that's been ferociously writing rye/lucanis rpf from the moment they were seen trotting down into the necropolis depths together (other pairings within the lighthouse gang as a whole, caught in tantalizing glimpses as they visit the necropolis, of course having their own devotees), and when this fandom subgroup eventually discover they were right it's with all the insane glee of a sixteen year old fanfic writer on wattpad (is that still where the kids are these days. idk i'm getting old folks) finding out that their dark mafia prince AU is basically true. varric might be gone but the legacy of friendfiction lives on after him. the king of thedas rpf being the shoulders of titans that young watchers are standing on to write fevered WILDLY inaccurate depictions of the private life of two of the most low-key domestic quietly devoted and undramatic people on the continent, one of them being varric's own poor little meow meow slash mentee, is something that can actually be so personal. rye does not end up terribly famous in the end considering the shit he manages to get done in this game, and he thanks his lucky stars for it. but to a tight-knit community of mourn watch fic writers he is blorbo from my apocalypse. it's all I could have wished for him.

(funniest possible outcome of all this: myrna gets so fucking tired of trying to understand what the novices are being so tittery about that she asks rye 'watcher ingellvar with the realization that this is a long shot and the admission that vorgoth and I have exhausted all other avenues of investigation: do you possess secret insight about what an 'x reader' is. and also 'ship war'. your name seems to come up in this context a surprising amount'. 9000000 points of incoming psychic damage about to hit the fan.)

[jarinnards]

Am I the only one who's sick and tired of the pan erasure that goes on in the DA fandom? I'm sorry (not) if you don't like it, but the companions are all pansexual. Don't piss me off.

[talesofesther]

an hour found

Lucanis Dellamorte x Rook

Summary: ❝If I have lost an hour this night, it is only to Rook. But lost is wrong. It is an hour found. An hour more clear than any other.❞

A/N: I wanted a deeper look into this sweet moment. <3

Masterlist

Nearing midnight;

It was quiet in the Lighthouse, the slice of the fade the team called home mimicked the night of the world outside and brought an air of calmness and peace. Everyone was already mostly asleep, or at least they should be—maybe Bellara was still up in her workshop, but she'd be calling it a night soon.

Everyone, except Lucanis. The resident assassin sat on the library's couch, a book in his hands and a half-full coffee cup on the center table. Hints of exhaustion showed on his face, on the dark circles under his eyes, but he was still skeptical about sleeping for too long. At least he'd ditched his vest, choosing to wear only his pants and button-up shirt to chase a resemblance of comfort.

The words from the book he tried reading blended together from time to time; he'd read the same page thrice over now. The soft hum of the astrolabe above him almost lulled him to sleep. Almost.

Until he heard a noise: the distant click of a door opening, and then the soft steps of socked feet coming closer.

Lucanis looked up from his book. It was Rook coming down from the stairs leading to her room. Her eyes were half-lidded, and she wore a sleepy smile on her lips. Lucanis felt his heart jump and stumble inside his chest, fingers gripping tighter onto his book. For some reason, his cheeks grew warmer the closer she drew.

"Rook…" The word had taken a softer, more gentle tone every time it came out of Lucanis's mouth lately, something akin to a breath of relief each time he saw her.

She smiled wider, walking up to him until she could sit right beside him. But Rook waited still, waited for Lucanis to meet her gaze and give a small smile in turn; only then did she make herself comfortable with him. It didn't go unnoticed by the crow how she was willing to respect his time alone if he so desired.

"What are you doing up this late?" Lucanis inquired, closing his book and setting it aside. She deserved his attention much more than the Orlesian romance tale he'd been trying to read.

Rook hummed, leaning back on the plush couch and allowing her shoulder to rest against Lucanis's. "Disturbing you."

The crow would be able to hear the smile in her words even if his eyes weren't locked on her; it stole one from him, too. He hesitated, all too aware of the warmth of her body against him. "Disturb is not… quite the word I'd use."

"Oh?" Rook raised a brow. One of her hands sneaked toward him and found his own. "And what word would you use?"

Lucanis looked down at their joined hands; Rook's fingers traced the faded scars on his knuckles and the back of his hand. Lucanis couldn't help but hold on to her. "Calming, maybe," he whispered. It was all so new, so fragile. Never in his life did he have something, someone like Rook. She was his first… everything. And it scared him, while at the same time, it made him want to drown in her presence.

His heart beat heavily inside his chest, near painfully. Lucanis raised his gaze only to find Rook much closer. He mapped the lines of her face with his eyes, following the curve of her cheeks, the slope of her nose, until he reached her lips. Lucanis's breath caught in his throat. His forehead touched hers, their noses almost bumping.

It was all intimate and tender, a moment tucked far away from the problems of the world, where only they existed. And he wanted to—oh, how much he wanted to just give in. But Lucanis felt his lower lip wobble with uncertainty and hesitation. Not because there was any doubt, no. But because his life had never been truly his; because a year filled with isolation and torture still haunted his dreams; because he loved her too much already, and it terrified him.

Rook saw it in his eyes; she had this way about her that always managed to break through his walls as if they were mere paper under the rain. And she smiled.

Lucanis felt faint with her love. He could crumble when, instead of pulling away, she took hold of his cheeks; her fingers brushing the area under his eyes, and she placed a lingering kiss between his brows.

He felt selfish as he raised a hand to close around her wrist, pushing the palm of her hand further against his cheek. Lucanis closed his eyes, gulping heavily. "I'm sorry. You deserve bette-"

The words stumbled and halted before he could finish, the culprit for it being Rook's thumb that came to rest above his lips, shushing him with a gentleness that felt almost foreign for the crow. A gentleness that came only with her.

"I've heard these words from you more times than I'd like to count," Rook's voice remained quiet and soft, so as to not break the moment. She held a pause, waiting until Lucanis opened his eyes again. "Why would you believe such a thing, Lucanis?"

The look on Rook's face made it seem as if his reoccurring affirmation of her deserving better than anything he could ever be, was as absurd a claim as saying Assan doesn't deserve his gingerwort truffles.

In the back of his mind, Lucanis knew that no answer he gave would ever convince her. So he relented, blaming it on the late hours of the night as he surrendered himself completely to her open arms.

Lucanis ducked his head, hiding the vulnerability that had begun pooling on the lower lid of his chocolate eyes. And Rook pulled him to her, arms circling around his shoulders as she allowed Lucanis to all but lay on top of her.

If the crow indulged in the warmth of her body for a few minutes longer that night, no one needed to know.

Maybe, in time, he'd learn to believe himself deserving of the happiness her mere presence brought to his life.

── ⋅ ஓ ⋅ ──

When Lucanis came back to his little room in the pantry, he reached for the aged paper on which he had scribbled down his routine for the day.

Right at the end of it, with an all too adoring smile on his lips, Lucanis added a final note; If I have lost an hour this night, it is only to Rook. But lost is wrong. It is an hour found. An hour more clear than any other.

⋆* ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

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Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are literally what keeps me motivated to continue posting here, so I’d appreciate it if you could take some time to reblog and comment. <3

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[mrsdellamorte]

✨peaceful, safe, warm✨

they’re so in love and they’re married now and getting a much deserved rest after saving the world

my thea and lucanis kofi comm from the lovely @mehyann ♥️✨

[inabstentia]

I’m going to make some people mad with this one, but no, the content in Lucanis’ romance is not “lacking”. It’s here. You just don’t like it.

Him not responding to the flirt options is not because he was “forgotten” or put on the side. It’s because he decides not to answer Rook's attempt at flirting with him. Not for a lack of interest on his part, mind you, but because his life is literally falling apart around him and he does not want to drag Rook with him in his mess - and it’s something that he tells you in the game, loud and clear.

I hc that before he reached "peace" with Spite, he actually had no intention in being in a relationship with Rook - to protect them or whatever - so he did not want to lead them on (during the almost-kiss he was probably just tired and forgot he was supposed to lock in.)

Like do I wish we had special animated scenes between him and our protagonist ? Sure ! But that’s not where the writers wanted to go.

Rook and Lucanis have no serious discussion about their relationship before Tearstone Island (which actually makes everything sadder because Lucanis thought he lost the one he loved and was never able to tell them). It’s clear for the both of them that the love is here, but they never truly expressed it or what they were for each other.

When Rook comes back and chooses to say “I don’t know how to feel” and he answers “I do. I know exactly how to feel” he’s finally accepting his own feelings and the fact that he wants them in his life, so for the first time, he’s completely allowing himself to love and, most importantly, be loved back. The kiss that they share here is their first and it’s for me the real beginning of their relationship as a couple.

They warned that all the romances would be different. Lucanis is a slow burn where you have to be patient with him and accept that he has, at first, more important things to deal with in his life than you.

I understand that people are disappointed. I was too. But that’s just how he is as a character. He needs time to process his emotions and let himself be appreciated like he deserves.

If that’s not what you were looking for in a romance, it’s fine, you have six others wonderful characters that could fit your taste more :) maybe Lucanis is just not the one for you.

(But he is for me and I love him)

[nemo-in-wonderland]

My home is my skin And in the world I've within All I have is my love for you

If I conceal my fear Will I be in the clear Or am I giving life to phantom pain

Cos it's playing out Every note in the score I surrender once more But as my tears fall they still

Kiss the feathers of a hummingbird in flight Breaking up into a million specks of light Take the shape of an angel in the night Carry you to peaceful fields

"ANGEL"- Poets of the Fall

----------------------------------------------------------

Nothing like falling asleep safe in each other's arms after enduring so much pain, after facing so much sorrow, and finally find some respite in the Realm of Morpheus, safe and sound in the comfort of the night.

And these two deserve a good night of rest.

So I like to imagine that, in Ravenna's room in the Lighthouse, she actually has a Chaise Lounge that is much comfortable to sleep into than her own bed. So I like to imagine that once her and Lucanis start sharing her room, that's where they actually sleep (and make love) most of the time lolol.

It was just a quick thing that I did anyway, but I have to be honest, I am loving this way of doing the lineart and the colouring. It's messy as fuck, but it feels 1000% me lolol.

I hope you will like this <3

--Nemo

[lizardsquisher]

Live footage of Emmrich's reaction to this chapter:

The Pirate and the Professor

Chapter Seven: Spilling the Tea 🫖

Mealtime in the Lighthouse was always a lively affair. Friends talking and laughing. Cutlery clanging. The table being pounded over a good story. It was not quite as boisterous as a pirate banquet, but it was fun. Plus, in the Lighthouse, everyone kept their clothes on and no one ever lost an eye.

Today, the rich, zesty aroma of Lucanis’ paella lingered in the dining room long after the meal was over. So, too, did the Lighthouse’s denizens.

Rook sat in the corner reading a book, her legs thrown over the arm of her chair, her bare feet dangling. The others seemed to have caught on to her solitary mood. They let her be. But she liked being near their merriment. Maker knew after all they’d been through, they deserved it. And for all the quiet in her bedroom, it rang too loud with doubts to offer her any peace.

Taash, Davrin, and Bellara had adjourned to the far end of the table to play cards. Bellara initially lost an alarming amount of coin due to her inability to bluff. Taash, moved to sympathy, started slipping better cards into Bellara’s hand while she wasn’t looking. But sleight of hand was not their strong suit. A frown creased the whorls of the vallaslin on Davrin’s forehead as he noticed one such exchange. With a long-suffering sigh, he kept his observations to himself. He did eventually suggest that they play with wooden tokens instead of gold. For practice. Not because he was being fleeced by the world’s most innocent cheater.

At the center of the table, Neve was chatting with Emmrich. Emmrich was curious about how Neve’s investigative methodology might apply to scholarly inquiries. Neve talked him through her process—how she gathered clues, mapped them out on her board, and came up with theories.

“How marvelous!” Emmrich said. “It’s just like drafting a thesis. I’m sure you’d make an excellent scholar, Neve.”

“I hate to tell you this, Professor, but I used to fall asleep in my classes at the Circle,” Neve replied wryly. “I’m less of a thinker and more of a doer.”

“It takes all kinds of contributions to produce an academic treatise,” Emmrich countered. “Experimentation might be more to your taste.”

“Emmrich, please don’t make me do school work. I’d rather fight an archdemon with a spoon.”

Read more at the link below.

[shouldaspunastory]

For @tevivinter, @lasatfat and @dadrunkwriting

Elgaris 'Elegy' Ingellvar x Lucanis Dellamorte, (SFW, Pining, First date, first kiss) 1651 words.

---------------------------------------

It’s not that Elgaris is ashamed of their body. Not anymore. You don’t put that much work into decorating something you don’t care about. Elgaris’s body is a tapestry of careful and purposeful scars artfully recreating the skeletal structure beneath skin, fat, and muscle, a few accidental scars that tell the story of what the battles and close calls they have survived, and the twin pink lines beneath each pectoral- their proudest and hardest earned- the battle for peace in their own body and to live as their most authentic self.

It's still a little surreal, still sometimes finds them lingering a moment longer than necessary in front of the full-length mirror after stepping out of the bath, eyes following the trail of water drops as they slide down their flat chest to their belly. But finally, for the first time in their life everyone else can see the person they always knew was inside. And if they don’t like what they see? Elgaris is secure enough not to be bothered by it.

This, though… it’s different.

Lucanis sees them. Of course he does. He always has, but tonight…

Elgaris can feel their heart hammering against their ribs as they slowly make their way down the hall from their quarters to the library and main living space. They take a slow, trembling breath, steadying themselves, then another. They focus on the cool stone beneath their feet with each step, a soft smile playing at the corners of their mouth as their dress swishes about them, the faintest whisper of the silks with each step.

“Holy crap,” Taash gapes as Elgaris steps out onto the terrace, eyes wide as they take in their new attire. “Lucanis seen that yet,” the qunari asks. Elgaris shakes their head, a gentle blush coloring the tips of their ears where they poke out from beneath their tight blonde spirals which free from any immediate concerns of conflict or work for them to interfere with, aren’t pulled back into their usual ponytail, but instead, hang loosely framing their face and ticking bare shoulders, a simple braid pulling back those few stubborn shorter pieces that would otherwise fall into their eyes.

“Omigosh, Rook, you look so pretty,” Lace exclaims excitedly as she makes her way to the top of the stairs.

“Yeah,” Taash agrees awkwardly. Clearly no better at compliments when the feelings are strickly platonic than they seem to be in what Elgaris has observed lately between them and their dwarven companion, though Lace doesn't seem too troubled by it.

“Thank you,” Elgaris smiles softly, the blush creeping up into their cheeks now, ducking their gaze shyly to their feet and the small, intricately embroidered flowers that adorn the dress- chrysanthemums, poppies, marigolds, dahlias, lilacs, carnations, lilies, roses, forget-me-nots, orchids, and tulips. Delicate, colorful reminders of the fragility and fleeting nature of life, and immortality and legacy of memory. It is a far cry from their Mourn Watcher robes they have continued to wear even after so long away from the Necropolis, and yet their origin and home is handstitched together into every inch of the fabric here too. “You- you don’t think it’s too much,” the elf asks, a little uncertainly.

“No way,” Lace grins, shaking her head. “You look lovely. I’m glad you bought it. You deserve to feel pretty, to take a moment for yourself. We’ve been doing nothing but running ever since the ritual, you especially.”

“Yeah, this is gonna give Lucanis a heart attack,” Taash add with a chuckle. “I mean, in a good way,” they add with a shrug when Lace looks up at them.

“Go get ‘em kid,” Varric chuckles softly, leaning against the wall to the infirmary with a fond grin. “They’re right, you deserve to have something for yourself and a little happiness in all this mess.” Elgaris nods, nerves soothed a little by their companion’s reassurances as they say their goodnights and make their way across the courtyard to find Lucanis.

“Rook, I thought it was my turn to cook, why is Bellara-“ Lucanis says as the elf opens the door to the kitchen and dining area, before the assassin turns to face them and all words seem to leave him, the silence broken only by Bellara’s soft giggles.

“I asked her to,” Elgaris smiles, quietly thrilled with the way his eyes can’t seem to decide quite where to look, but haven’t once left them since they arrived. “I thought perhaps you and I might go out for the night,” the elf says softly. “Have dinner at Café Pierta and maybe wander the markets together afterwards,” they suggest hopefully. “Unless you’d rather stay in,” Elgaris adds after a moment when Lucanis still hasn’t said anything.

“No,” Lucanis replies quickly shaking his head, taking several stumbling steps forward to close the gap between them, the slightest distortion, a chorus of his own voice and Spite’s as they answer them bringing another soft smile to the elf’s face as she watches him. “No,” he repeats as he stops in front of them, dragging his gaze back up from the low plunge of their dress that highlights the skeletal patterned scars over their clavicle, sternum, and ribs to meet their large violet eyes, sparkling with hope, tenderness, and an inescapable partiality that makes Lucanis’s stomach do flips. “A night out with you sounds… perfect,” Lucanis confesses softly with a smile that makes Elgaris feel weak at the knees.

“Meirda,” Lucanis whispers softly, shaking his head softly, still not breaking eye contact with them. “Should I go change? I feel like I should go change. I’m not sure I have anything here that’s-“ the assassin mutters softly.

“Lucanis,” Elgaris interrupts softly, one of their small hands reaching out to clasp his own and offering it a reassuring squeeze. “You look fine,” they reassure him with a fond and patient smile, “handsome as ever.”

“Yes, but you look...“ Lucanis starts to protest, barely registering the compliment in his urgency to somehow prove himself worthy of their company, “like you stepped out of a dream,” the assassin breathes before Elgaris can say anything more, causing the elf to blush furiously.

“Oh,” Elgaris manages softly, briefly registering a stifled, gleeful squeal from behind Bellara’s hand clamped tight over her mouth as she is clearly doing her best trying to pretend to be busy with the dinner preparations for the rest of their companions during this exchange, rather than the reality, which is that the elf is likely taking meticulous notes for their next attempt at a romance serial. “Do you dream of me often,” the elf replies, before immediately kicking themselves for not thinking before opening their mouth. Why in the Fade did they say that?

“YES,” Spite answers before Lucanis can reply or protest, causing the assassin to wince a little in a way that makes the answer clear even to Bellara who doesn’t have the luxury Elgaris does as a skilled Mourn Watcher of being able to hear Spite. Elgaris, at least, has the good grace not to laugh at his expense.

“Never anything as good as this though,” Lucanis says softly, looking down to where their hands still clasp his own with a small smile, his thumb gently rubbing the back of their hand. “Shall we? If you’re sure I’m dressed well enough to be seen with you,” Lucanis says, gesturing towards the door. Elgaris nods, still smiling, still holding his hand as they make their way to the Eluvian that will bear them on to Treviso.

“I’m relatively certain we’re awake,” Elgaris says softly with a smile as they take their seats at the café a short while later.

“Oh? Because of the coffee,” Lucanis asks, taking another slow and grateful sip from his cup. Elgaris waits for him to swallow and set the cup back down on the table before answering with a mischievous smile, emboldened by their date and the way he’s scarcely been able to take his eyes off them since they walked into the dining hall.

“Because in my dreams, we’re usually kissing,” Elgaris whispers. Lucanis inhales sharply, eyes snapping open, pupils blown wide as he stares back at them.

“Rook- Elegy, I-“ Lucanis replies hoarsely, momentarily glancing out towards the canals, looking embarrassed.

“NO,” Spite interrupts. “ROOK OPENS DOORS. STOP CLOSING THEM.”

Elgaris does their best to suppress a smile at the spirit scolding the assassin’s hesitation and self-doubts.

“I’m sorry I ran off,” Lucanis whispers softly, still looking slightly shamed despite his spirit’s dressing down and the elf’s patience.

“It’s alright,” Elgaris replies gently. Of course, it had confused them. Frustrated them. To have come so very close to what the pair of them had seemed to be dancing around for so long, to what Elgaris had scarcely allowed themselves to dream they might have, let alone to find it amid all this. But hearing him speak with some of their other companions, talking to Spite when they had freed them both from the prison of his own mind, they’ve come to understand it. That he might be as unsure, as anxious about irrevocably ruining things between them and losing them as Elgaris is, maybe even more so. The fear lingers, even now. But the hope, the pull around their heart in his direction is stronger. “Stay with me now,” the elf asks hopefully, mindful of their cups as they reach across the table to clasp his hand in theirs as his eyes lift back up to meet theirs.

“I can’t begin to imagine what you see in me,” Lucanis admits shaking his head softly, “but I pray you never stop seeing it.”

“Never,” Elgaris promises fondly, a brilliant smile taking over their face as Lucanis stands and rounds the table, still holding their hand and gently tugging them up to their feet, before pulling them into his arms for a soft, tender kiss.

[kirain]

@redheadsramblings Just a little thank you for all the likes and reblogs!

Rowan walked the winding path outside the Lighthouse, her steps slow and unsteady. The cool breeze whisked through her dark-scarlet hair, but she barely felt it. Her head hung low, her eyes locked on the ground as her thoughts turned over and over.

Elgar'nan was defeated. The battle was over.

Soon, everyone would be leaving. Bellara back to her people, Lucanis to the Crows, Taash to wherever they pleased. Even Emmrich, who unlike her was well regarded in Nevarra, would have to return eventually. It was his home, the Mourn Watch his family. Though she too was a member, he was a professor; renowned, respected. They came from the same Necropolis, yet they lived worlds apart—worths apart. His life was written in gilded ink, while hers had been scrawled in the dirt.

"I'll miss you," she winced, her voice pained and quiet.

She had always known, despite his assurances. Their companionship, their love—it was fleeting, a fire kindled in the dark, meant to warm them for a time, but never to last.

She didn't belong with him.

He'd built himself up from nothing, and now he was something. A man who had saved the world, the Fade, the living and the dead. A teacher, a scholar, an expert, a symbol. Rowan was none of that and less—a reject, nudged out of the Order before they even met. Despite her accomplishments with the Veilguard, that shame would follow her, and inevitably mark him.

Surely he wouldn't allow it. For his own sake, for his reputation, he'd need to walk away.

Her fingers clenched against her sleeves as she accepted it. It wasn't fair to feel abandoned. No one owed her anything, least of all him. Her friends had fought beside her, laughed with her, held her when the weight of loss overwhelmed her. That had been enough. More than enough.

More than she deserved.

Yet, it still felt as though the ground was crumbling beneath her, ready to give way at any moment.

With a heavy sigh, she stopped in her tracks and shook her head. "Enough, Rowan," she told herself. "They all have lives, and you weren't a part of them until the Veilguard. We'll... write to each other. It'll be fine."

Suddenly, movement ahead caught her eye—Emmrich sat on a bench, with Manfred standing beside him, the skeleton's bones clicking softly as he shifted. They rarely left the interior of the Lighthouse, but Emmrich seemed lost in thought, and she didn't wish to disturb him. She stepped back, careful not to make a sound, but before she could turn away, a gust of wind sent a piece of parchment flying straight into her face.

She sputtered, pulling it away, about to crumple it—until she saw the words that had been penned.

A halo crowns your brow in crimson light,

Like rubies kissed by dawn's embrace so bright.

Your laughter, warm, turns sorrow into flight,

Yet shadows linger, whispered out of sight.

Your emerald eyes, a tide both fierce and deep,

Would pull me under, drowning with a smile.

If such a fate is love's own vow to keep,

Then let me sink and stay a long, sweet while.

I know the ghosts that whisper in your mind,

The echoes of a past that let you fall.

But here I stand, steadfast, forever kind,

No fate nor fire shall break this oath at all.

So burn, my love, shine bright, let sadness cease—

For in my arms, you'll always rest in peace.

Rowan's breath hitched, the words blurring as tears welled in her eyes.

He had written this. For her.

Overcome with emotion, she pressed a trembling hand to her mouth, her heart racing. Then, she walked towards him, her legs weak. She didn't know what she'd say, but she wanted to thank him—somehow. No one had ever seen her this way, described her so beautifully.

Manfred saw her first and clapped, his jaw hanging loose in excitement. "Rook!" he cried. "Rook, Rook, Rook, Rook!"

Emmrich turned sharply at the sound. When he saw Rowan, he smiled—warm and easy, but it faltered when he noticed her tears. He stood immediately, closing the distance between them.

"Rowan? What's wrong? Are you all right?"

She nodded, swallowing thickly. She tried to speak, but she could only muster the strength to hold up the parchment. Emmrich's gaze flickered to it, then back to her, and almost at once, his ears and cheeks blushed a vibrant red.

"O-oh," he stammered, looking away with such a shy expression that Rowan's own nerves coiled in ecstasy. "That was... a draft. You weren't meant to... that is to say... it wasn't finished. I couldn't quite—"

Rowan's eyes drifted past him, landing on the bench. A pile of parchment lay beside where he'd been sitting, each page covered in ink. Some had words crossed out, others were crumpled at the edges.

He'd been writing for hours.

Quiet sobs tore from her throat and, without hesitation, she wrapped her arms around the flustered man, her fingers curling into his coat.

Emmrich stilled only for a moment before he let out a soft breath and hugged her back, his hand threading through her silken hair—strands he cherished. He knew she'd been worrying, doubting herself, assuming she'd be discarded, and it broke him. He wanted to surprise her, to prove his devotion, and though this wasn't how he'd planned it, he had succeeded.

"You're not alone, Rowan," he whispered. "You'll never be alone again."

She buried her face in his chest, feeling the chill of her fears melt away. "Do you mean that?"

He smiled, tightening his embrace. "I promise, my darling. Never again."

[wardensantoineandevka]

y'know, maybe it's just because I love and really enjoy characters like Illario and relationships like his and Lucanis's, and I'm often a fool who hopes even burnt bridges can be mended, even if they're different now, but—

I do NOT understand it when people who DO spend time understanding and articulating that Illario is a complicated person whose motivations are tangled, his feelings toward Lucanis are messy and contradictory, he clearly carries and has to continue to carry a lot of grief and regret and heartache alongside that rage and resentment and bitterness, and the entire situation is full of a deep and often self-inflicted pain from all sides, and then they turn around and go, "And that's why Illario is an awful and despicable person who should suffer forever because it is the righteous and just hell for terrible monsters like him, and he should know a moment's peace and rest, and his soul should rot forever as he morally deserves because he's clearly incapable of getting better." (Not an exact quote, but I HAVE seen some these specific phrases and still this is not at all exaggerating some sentiment I've personally seen.)

Keeping in mind that like, this is different from wanting his life to be a living hell of his own design as a Put That Guy In A Situation and because it's interesting to gnaw on the idea of him having to carry that burden forever (same), I mean, when people acknowledge the complexity of his situation and how complicated and contradictory his relationship is to Lucanis and his tangled emotions about a cousin he seems to still love, and then they STILL vindictively want him to suffer bc they feel he's irredeemable and rotten and horrific to the depths of his soul. I don't personally and emotionally get that. (Do not take this as an opportunity to explain it to me. I see where it comes from intellectually. I don't comprehend it emotionally.)

I don't get this perspective on Illario especially when this is a game about how none of us are doomed to be that which we've become, none of us are doomed to play the villain we think we must be if we accept our own redemption, none of us are undeserving of a second chance or beyond saving if we only just take the hand when it is offered—and he is, after all, at Minrathous.

[victias]

My take on the letter from tearstone island prompt I've seen so many amazing fics of (if anyone knows who first did this please lmk so i can credit)

My Dearest Lucanis,

If you are reading this I did not return from Tearstone Island, if I am honest I always believed that this job would claim my life and maybe on some level that is why I accepted it, almost two years ago now, gods it seems like a lifetime. But this letter isn’t about me, not really, its about you. 

There is so much I wish I had been brave enough to tell you face to face despite you changing the subject every time I tried, well you cant redirect a dead woman so I’m saying it now and you’ll just have to brood about it ha! My soul has never felt as at peace as it does in your presence, my smile never as big, my laugh never as free, you have made me feel seen in a way that i never thought possible and I need you to know.

I wish I could help you see yourself as I see you, not only handsome but strong, resilient, kind, you use your training not only to spot weaknesses in your targets but to learn about those around you, how Emmrich likes his tea, picking out the perfect cape for Taash, and my churros, rarely do you ever have to ask but when you need to you do without hesitation, always willing to learn, to be there for those around you. You are determined and protective, more times than I can count you have saved my life. You care so deeply  though you try to hide it and give second chances even when people maybe don’t deserve them – yes i mean Illario (seriously watch your back there lest you join me sooner than your time), your witt is so fast and your heart so big. I truly never deserved the attention you gave me, the gentleness in your voice as we spoke and the way your concerned eye, makers breath your beautiful brown eyes, would linger on me when I would say I was fine and you knew I was hiding my pain, you always knew.

And Spite, you have grown so much, learned so much and whilst doing so you never cease to make me laugh. Your confidence in me to help Lucanis when he most needed it touched my heart in a way I can never truly express, to be trusted by a demon is a honour I never expected in this life, just know that it is mutual. I trust you with my life, Spite and more than that I trust you with Lucanis'. You have so much to offer each other despite this situation you were both forced in to and I hope you continue to make deal after deal until you find that perfect harmony. I am sorry I won’t be there to see it.

There is so much more I wish I could write, but we leave soon and I don’t have the time. Know that I love you. That the time we have spent together, reading, drinking coffee, holding hand, sharpening knives, me ‘helping' you cook, the simplest of things, have been the happiest of my life and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

I love you, always

‘Rook’

PS. A first kiss, I think, would have tasted like coffee and cinnamon, not honey and lavender cream.

[lagunapoint]

I finished Vows and Vengeance, and below is a stream of consciousness, thoughts, tears, and spoilers for the podcast. Sit down next to me oh I have so much to tell you

I cried at the end of the podcast. And I was putting off listening to the last episode I didn't want it to end. Silly, right? I got attached to the podcast, to the characters, the atmosphere, to the way I could just disconnect from the world and not use up almost any energy.

I was just sitting there with a cup of chamomile tea, hoping it and the podcast would help me reach nirvana, but instead of peace and the reunion of the main characters, I was wiping away tears and gave up any hope of going to bed early. This is why I love the Dragon Age plots and characters.

And it’s so familiar, that bitter acceptance at the end… when you're wiping away tears but realizing that life goes on? That evil was defeated, but your heart is lying in pieces in the corner? And you just have to move on?

She tried so hard to save him. Nadia. She did everything she could. She learned to accept herself, the people around her, others' care and help. Do you think the Nadia we heard in the first episode would have trusted Lucanis or Emmrich so quickly? Or left him alone to perform the ritual? She deserved happiness. In my metaverse Nadia and Elio were supposed to be together, and Solas spanked. But something went wrong. As always. And I don’t understand. Is there a Solavellan context here, or my rambling become completely incoherent?

Solas is stuck in the Fade. He needs to be saved, right? Lavellan will worry and try to save him. We’re counting on a happy ending.

Nadia's beloved is stuck in the Fade. She worries and tries to save him. And what? He’s dead. She couldn’t save him because he died almost immediately and there was never any hope, to begin with. haha thanks a lot.

I’m trying, trying, I really am trying not to connect things that have no connection. But. But I can't help but stir up this storm inside me and project the story onto Solas and Lavellan. And I'm vibrating and shaking because it’s tearing apart my canon, my heart, and I can’t think about it anymore.

Yes, it was a great story. I want a second season. I want more of these audio dramas. I’m waiting for the game, but I loved listening and doing little rituals before each session, whether it was a cup of tea, a box of chocolates, or a short post here. It was awesome. How about you? :)

[iamnotyourgodsherald]

Fanfic: Taste Tester

Rating and Pairing: Elven M!Rook (OC) x Lucanis Dellamorte. SFW (Still 18+ Blog so lmao)

Contains: Lots of Affection. Teasing, Cooking, Fluff. Kissing. Hugging, Comforting Partner. Awkwardness.

“So, what am I here for again? I thought you don't like it when I'm in the kitchen with you because I'm distracting~?” Demitrix purred.

“If you behave, I’ll let you stay. Besides, I need your taste buds. I am making this for everyone.” Lucanis scolded.

“All I'm doing is taste testing? Is that necessary?” Demitrix chuckled.

“Yes. I need to know if this will be good. I've messed with some of the recipe and I was hoping it came out right.”

Demitrix was sitting nearby in one of the dining room chairs, looking over at the bubbling stew that sat on the burning stove, then back at his beloved. Lucanis’s black, feathery hair hung down as he stirred and his dark eyes staying sharply focused.

“You are so cute when you are focused. Makes me want to bother you.” Demitrix purred mischeviously.

Lucanis gave Demitrix a stern, scolding glance.

“Don’t make me banish you.” Lucanis warned, waving the wooden spoon he was using. “Behave.”

“Fine! Fine. I’ll behave. But only because I like the view.~”

Lucanis rolled his eyes, but a soft subtle smile grew on his lips. After a few moments, he ladled some stew broth and brought it up.

“Come here, Mi Amore. It’s had some time to simmer.”

Demitrix hopped out of the chair, sauntering over to stand next to him. His raven black curls hanging in front of his face, which Demitrix lazily tried brushing them away. Lucanis turned to look at him and made a face.

“You are going to dip your hair in the broth.”

Before Demitrix could protest, Lucanis swooped his hand under his bangs, and brought the spoon to his lips.

“Your hair is getting long.” Lucanis observed.

Demitrix jolted, blushing brightly at his touch and sipped at the broth. The surge of salty and savory flavor on his tongue melded nicely, leaving a soft spicy feeling that lingered on his lips. The warmth of the stock made him feel so cozy, it was like he was wrapped up in his fluffy blankets back in his room.

“Did you add spice? It gives it a nice kick. It's like I'm back home in my apartment, under my blankets during a cold day.” He giggled.

“Good. I want there to be some kind of comfort in it. Harding was talking about being homesick, and I wanted to try and make her feel better...” He chuckled.

Such a doll… We don't deserve him.

Demitrix watched Lucanis taste it himself, tucking some hair behind his ear as he did. His eyes darted around as he began thinking after he tasted it before adding a pinch of something.

He’s so cute when he’s focused. He seems so natural in this setting. So at peace. I don’t see him like this very often. I wonder if he gets this comfortable at home too, when he was cooking… Ah! Lucanis Dellamorte, Housewife!

“You know, when we first met, I never thought that you’d be so… domestic. You came to us in the Lighthouse, and immediately started taking care of a flock of women and myself. Making sure we ate, caring about our health. I mean you got a mint plant for Harding when she was having nightmares.” Demitrix explained, going over and leaning back on a nearby counter. “Never thought the Mage Killer we needed was going to be so caring and nurturing. Now, he’s my lover. Making stew for his makeshift family.”

“Assassins have to always be prepared for any situation. If I can look like a servant, a chef, a laundry boy, I must know how to act like one as well in order to blend in. I'll teach you some of those blending techniques, if you wish. You are… very loud and while that's not always a bad thing, you… should learn to blend in more. I worry. As for you and “the flock of women” we had at the time, you all were eating scraps of food and whatever Harding was finding at the time. Bellara is an excellent cook but even she was struggling to cook for all of you. I was happy to pitch in. Plus… I didn't notice this at first, but when you eat something you like, your skin glows, and your eyes get big and bright. Like you can't believe you’ve never tasted something that good. It's… adorable.”

Demitrix smiled, watching him yap as he talked. His mind went elsewhere as he stared at Lucanis’s thick lips moving. However, as soon as he called him adorable, Demitrix’s face went pink and the color spread across his dark freckled face.

“A-Adorable?! I… don’t understand.” Demitrix said, looking away.

He felt his ears lower and his face grew hot in embarrassment. He tried to look away to hide it, but Lucanis turned to him and sputtered, trying to cover his mouth to hide his laughter.

“Meirda, you’re so pink!” He laughed, setting the spoon down. “You get flustered and embarrassed when I compliment you! It’s really cute! …And funny.” Lucanis stiffled.

Demitrix was now turning redder, trying to hide his face with his hands and groaning loudly.

“Stooop! You...! Agh! You can't just be so sweet out of nowhere…! I am so weak to you! Why are embarrassing me like this?!” Demitrix growled.

“I rarely ever get to see you flustered, its- Oh, don't hide your face! Come here.” He laughed.

Demitrix growled, about to protest more but he suddenly felt strong arms wrap around him and hug him tightly. His body going rigid before he melted into it as Lucanis squeezed him laughing.

“I love seeing you embarrassed. It's rare, you're usually so confident… and to think that I could fluster you like that…” Lucanis giggled.

Oh his giggling… His hugs… My heart is beating so fast!

“Lucaaaa…” Demitrix whined.

Lucanis pulled away, kissing Demitrix’s face and smiling at him, cupping his face in his hands. Demitrix instinctually grabs his hands to keep them on his face.

“Mi amore, I love you so much.” He purred softly.

Demitrix smiled, softly melting against the counter they were leaning on.

“I love you too, amore..” Demitrix said sheepishly.

Demitrix then sniffed the air, as something in the air turned bitter and sharp.

“Is something burning?”

Lucanis paused and sniffed. He then dropped Demitrix on the counter and ran to the stove, cursing in Antivan. He pulled the pot off the burner and tried stirring it up, examining the contents. Once dinner seemed to be saved, he sighed looking at Demitrix, leaning on the counter and giving him an annoyed look.

“Meirda! You are too distracting for your own good.” He shook his head.

Demitrix only laughed, now getting off of the counter he fell onto and dusting himself off.

“That's why you banish me, just like you said. I’m okay, by the way. Thanks for asking.” Demitrix joked.

Lucanis then looked apologetically at him, setting the pot to the side.

“Ah… Sorry I…” He trailed off.

He rushed back over, dusting Demitrix’s back quickly before looking embarrassed and stepping away from him. Fiddling with his hands nervously, as if he was in trouble.

“I am… not good at being…attentive or suave. Or just... I just rush to fix things and I just didn’t think about… my apologies. I am just inexperienced with… this.” He stammered, motioning to Demitrix and himself. “It’s hard to remember that I have a partner now. I am not sure what to say or do most of the time and when I dropped you, I didn’t mean to just… Be patient with me, Please.”

Demitrix laughed and immediately wrapped his arms around his neck, hugging him. He let Lucanis slowly melt into it and felt him wrap his arms around him. Demitrix stayed quiet just to let Lucanis breathe and clear his mind, feeling his quick heartbeats slow down. After it seemed Lucanis calmed down, Demitrix pulled away, looking into Lucanis’s eyes. Immediately getting lost in them and sighing deeply.

“Lucanis. I understand. Okay? We are both new at relationships… but what I do know is that I love you. Whatever you need from me, Luca, you’ll have. You need space? You got it. You need affection? I am right there. You need patience? Done. There’s just one thing I will not do.”

“What…?” He hesitated.

“Give up on you.” Demitrix smiled, kissing his nose. “You're stuck with me now.”

Lucanis smiled, his heart beating faster before hugging Demitrix tightly.

“I think I can live with that.”

[mrsdellamorte]

Codex Day 11: Letter from Rook to their love interest

A Letter to The First Talon

No drawings are on this sealed letter. The wax seal is stamped with ‘A.L.M’ for -Althea Loren Mercar- on orange parchment, with hints of lavender in the folds

Dear Lucanis,

As I’m writing this, you’re fast asleep next to me. You look so peaceful… beautiful even. You deserve that and more after everything you’ve gone through. Thank you for trusting me enough to see you this way.

The last few weeks have been so jarring between saving the clan, dealing with Aelius, clearing out Invenci and the Antaam-it’s hard to find a second to breathe. So, this letter is just to say thank you.

From the moment we saved you from The Ossuary, you haven’t left my side. I was nervous at first, that you felt as if you had to, like you owed me a debt. But now, looking back now, I’m so grateful you were there.

In the midst of all this chaos, with the weight of the world possibly ending, to know you were always within an arms reach or deflecting a blow I didn’t see, squeezing my hand through my panic-I wouldn’t have made it this far without you.

And tomorrow, we face the impossible, stopping the gods at Tearstone Island. With you by my side I feel I can conquer anything, and I know you don’t do promises but… I will do everything I can to keep you safe. I vow that to you. We will make it through this together.

You have brightened my life in ways I can’t even describe. To know you is a joy, to be known by you is something I will never take for granted. You have shown me so much patience, love and care, and that extends to Amalia as well. Thank you. You always make things better whether you know it or not. I hope you do. Thank you for being you.

Tomorrow, I’m not sure how things will go, and just in case I don’t have the chance to say:

My heart is yours. It’s been yours since I saw you unlocking the gate in Minrathous.

I love you.

-Althea

[100jewels-between-teeth]

18+ Oneshot

Word count: 3562

AO3 ¤ Ko-Fi ¤ Masterlist

~

Summary: With the end of the war, life returns to normal. The choices that some have made begin to weigh on the mind, and some are there to set what needs to be set straight. For the sake of love

Characters: Illario Dellamorte, f!Rook de Riva, Lucanis Dellamorte, Viago de Riva

Cw: graphic depictions of a kind of violence, read at your own discretion

An: What can I say but, fuck Illario Dellamorte. Enjoy! Make sure to follow or look at my other works, big things on the way!

Of course, after everything, places like the cafe did not feel the same anymore. The aroma that hung in the air of roasted beans and spices that once carried feelings of nostalgia and comfort now filled the man’s heart with dread and regret. The sound of the water, the chiming bells of incoming gondolas and merchant calls, all of it was tainted now. An undeserved peace and comfort that brought him nothing but shame for what he had almost caused, and what had been so graciously given back to him. 

Maybe that was the cruelty of it all. That Illario had to continue existing in a world that he had tried to bring down. He couldn't even hide. 

Truly, Illario did not want to be here. 

This was the first time he had come back to Cafe Pietra since his coup. Really, other than the battle in Minrathous, this was the first time Illario had shown himself outside at all. Of course, there was that looming paranoia of the other Crows. Just because Lucanis had ‘forgiven’ his transgressions, did not mean the rest of the Crows followed suit. Even now, sitting at the usual table he and his cousin would frequent, he could hear the whispers, the veiled insults. Glares that wished their looks could, indeed, kill. 

Ilarrio did know, however, he was not in such a place to reject invitations. So when he had gotten the missive from his cousin’s new paramour, who was still reeling from the heights of their world saving antics, he was not about to say no. Disregarding his cousin’s love was not exactly a way to get back into his good graces.

Besides, he never really disliked Rook. Maybe this could be the start of some sort of redemption arc for himself. 

As Rook made her own entrance into the cafe, Illario could not help but pity her. A Fifth Talon to one of the greatest heros Thedas had seen, it couldn't be anything but overwhelming to the woman. Coming from a life where discretion and secrecy were your greatest allies, now to having every person know your name. Illario felt that envy bloom again in his chest, that anger of being denied what he felt deserved. But he could dwell on that later.

For now he could play the role of the atoner. 

The woman knew how to stand out. That wild curly hair framing eyes that looked like burning embers. A warm smile that he knew was masking the months of hardship and pain she had endured. To his surprise, the patrons of the cafe seemed to not pay much mind. Yes, there were a few who gave gasps, others with respectful nods. But he could assume that people were so used to her wearing the Crow uniform that the shimmering dark purple saree she now doned was enough of a disguise for her. To see the woman dressed so casual, even if the garbage was anything but, must have been some kind of relief to her. Illario was not too sure - he had always loved the attention, personally. 

Illario made sure to stand as Avantika approached, bowing his head to the woman. “Things must be finally calming for you after everything.” 

Illario was not sure exactly how to break the ice. He knew that, with Rook, he was treading a very thin line. Even Though she herself was the one that pushed for Lucanis to forgive, rather than imprison him, she still loathed him. Siding with the Evanuris, betraying his own cousin, being the reason for his possession. It was unforgivable, that much he knew. But whether it was Lucanis pushing her to be more understanding, or her own volition, his comment elicited a warm smile. 

“I would not go that far, but I can finally leave without being stopped every ten steps with an invitation to some kind of banquet or delegation.” Avantika rolled her eyes, her smile still gracing her features as she took her seat across from Illario. 

For a moment, he felt like he could pretend that nothing happened. That they were just two colleagues, dare he say friends, meeting for a much needed coffee to chat about the world. Honestly, some kind of normalcy would do them both good. Illario was smart enough to know, however, that would never be the case for either of them now, for complete opposite reasons. 

“I already took the liberty of ordering our coffee. I hope it was alright to order you from what you had last time.” Illario could then see Avantika tense slightly. 

To most untrained eyes they would have missed it. To a Crow, however, even the slightest movement could be noticed. She did her best to cover it with another smile, leaning back in her chair into a more relaxed position. 

“Thanks. Honestly, after everything, the amount of caffeine in our systems has lessened immensely.” So it was going to be Rook to bring Lucanis into this. 

That relieved Illario in a way, it meant he wouldn't have to navigate the minefield of the topic of his cousin. Better for her to do so. Of course the comment made Illario break into a smirk. 

“So you are a miracle worker then. Not only have you saved the world, you have saved my cousin’s coffee addiction.” He could not help but joke, deciding to take a more relaxed position himself. “Now if you can get him to maybe sweeten his tastes a little-” 

“Trust me, I can't work that miracle.” Avantika jumped in on the beat, a deep laugh resonating that reassured Illario. “Besides, if he enjoyed the sweeter things, I'd have to worry about sugar keeping him up too. I can only fight so many battles.” 

For a moment, Rook looked out into the canal beside them, giving Illario a slight moment of reprieve to finally relax himself. This whole wait, he was not sure what side of Rook he would see, how tense this meeting would be. But she, shockingly, was exuding nothing but warmth. Maybe Lucanis had talked to her, maybe she was more forgiving and lenient than he thought. It reassured him, knowing it was something he could work with. 

If he had Rook’s trust and good graces, there would be no better person to vouch for him to be trusted by the others. She could get him back in, keep him safe in a way. It wasn’t manipulation, more so taking advantage of a good situation. 

As their coffees were placed before the pair, Illario decided to take the chance and broach the elephant in the room. 

“Rook, Ava, I want to thank you. For… this. I know what I did to everyone was unforgivable. For Lucanis to forgive… for you to be the one to push it. I am in your debt. Please know that I do sorely regret what I've done. My reputation, the family, Lucanis…” Illario cleared his throat, feeling it tighten as his emotions started to show through the mask of charm. “I want to make amends.” 

Rook’s eyes tore away from the water, burning amber staring into Illario. Her face was unmoving, an emotionless stare just looking at him. No, into him. Like she was able to analyse his very mind and soul. It was unnerving, Illario doing his best to not show his nervousness. But as if sensing the tension, Avantika broke it with another warm smile as she grabbed her cup delicately by the handle, raising it towards Illario in a toast. 

“To making amends.” 

Reflecting her own smile, he raised his own cup to her, the porcelain chiming together. “To making amends.” 

They both retreated to their cups, Illario thankful that the coffee can finally relax them more. Setting the cup down, the corner of his lips turned to a frown. 

“Honestly, I don't see what my cousin loves so much about this cafe. Maybe it is just me. They always seem to burn the coffee. Too bitter for my tastes.” Picking up the small silver pitcher, he added more cream to the brew, the taste slightly better as he took another sip. 

Avantika could only chuckle as she sipped her own. “Trust me, I know. I’ve had to get used to it. When I told Lucanis about how I would take my coffee before, he had to sit down. Said it was a crime. I’ll give it to him though, he converted me.” 

Rook smiled at the memory, taking another sip with a sigh.

“How is he? We… have not spoken much since Minrathous.” Illario felt that small wave of shame overcome him again. 

He did miss Lucanis, ironically, for putting the man in a prison for a year. With Lucanis being back, those brief moments with him before Illario’s plan was shown, had been nothing short of amazing. He had truly missed the Crow. 

Avantika thought for a moment, lips pursed as she traced her finger across the rim of her cup. 

“It is an adjustment, being back. After coming from the Ossuary straight into a war, there hasn't been a whole lot of time to… settle.” Her face regained that warm smile, eyes back to Illario. “But, he is good. Very much in that ‘I don't want you away from my sight.’ phase, which I can't blame him. I’m in that phase, too.” 

Illario joined her chuckle, his own face reflecting her smile. “Honestly seeing my cousin like this, actually happy and having someone to love in his life, he deserves it… you deserve it. Overbearing adoration at all.” 

His emotions swelled up, the last words getting choked up in his throat once more. 

“Thank you, Illario. It means so much to hear you say that.” Avantika beamed as she sat herself up a little, taking a sip of her coffee. “Truly though, he has taught me a lot. Not just about myself, but the world, family, coffee.” Avantika giggled as she motioned to his cup. “It still amazes me just how complex the flavours can be. The things you can do with just a cup of coffee. What did he say about Andoral’s Breath? Bitter and sweet… like a kiss goodbye…” 

Her voice drifted off wistfully, as if getting lost in a memory. 

Her head tilted as her eyes found him again. “Would you say that is how yours tastes?” 

“I wouldn't know Rook I–” Illario cleared his throat again, trying to rid the tickle in the back of his throat. “I did not order that...” 

Illario cleared his throat again, feeling as if he had a small itch that seemed to dry the passage. But looking down at the cup in his hand, swirling the contents around in the cup, its scent wafted into his nose, a fear beginning to bloom in his gut.

“Like I said, coffee like that is so hard to replicate the taste of. How it lingers on the palette, the scent, even its thickness.”Avantika’s warm smile remained, yet it did not reach her eyes this time. Eyes that were now cold, a wildfire behind that carried every drop of anger she had hidden. “I couldn't tell you how many times I tried to replicate it, make it near exact. But I think what I have now would make Viago, even Lucanis proud! Andoral’s Breath…” 

As if it were clockwork that slight itch in his throat morphed into what he could feel was a near blister, his body beginning to tingle as he could feel his cardiovascular system start to get heavy, inflamed, pained. A pressure building behind his eyes as he gripped his chair to shoot upwards in panic. 

“I wouldn't do that if I were you.” Her tone was quiet and sharp, but Avantika did not flinch. 

No weapon drawn, no magic crackling between her fingers. Rook remained still, the smile not leaving. 

“If I were you,” Avantika took a long sip of her coffee. “I would do my best to relax, take in the scenery and listen to me. Your heart is already pumping alarmingly fast. Veins beginning the slow process of coagulation, or rupturing, I can't remember. Causing your heart to race, raising your body temperature by panicking will only speed the process. Sitting here, talking to me, I'd say you have a few minutes. If you decide to act rash and panic…. You won't make it to the door.” 

He cursed himself. Of course he should have expected this - especially from a de Riva. To so blindly trust the one who had fooled his own coup, his fight or flight urge screamed in his brain, a brain he could only assume was swelling more and more. 

Was this woman fool enough to kill a Dellamorte in the open? He could only assume yes. 

“I would be wise and listen to what I have to say. That is what is going to keep you alive, so don't be stupid.” 

As if nothing were happening, she waved over the batista, another cup of coffee procured as Avantika sat back again, relaxed as ever. Illario could jot be sitting straighter, as still as a corpse, trying his best to breathe through the viscous liquid erupting from the boils and blisters in his throat. 

“I'm sure Viago did not talk about me much before. If he did I'm sure it was nothing but complaints and whinging. ‘Idiot’ he would call me.” Avantika snickered to herself, her tone and posture so casual it was almost as if Illario’s body was not melting on itself literally. 

He could almost feel his blood thickening and coagulating beneath his skin, trying so hard to keep his breathing controlled. 

“Well, if he has mentioned it or not, obviously we aren't really related.” Avantika gestured to her pointed ears poking from her wild hair. “Funny thing about that, I don't think he has ever really mentioned how we met.” 

Her finger twirled around the top of her cup, the contents swirling magically beneath as she stared at the canal once more. 

Illario wanted nothing more than to run, but for the sake of life preservation, he prayed to the Maker that somehow, someway, listening to her ramblings would save him.

Rook's brow arched as she stared at Illario. 

“I was Dalish, you see. Small clan, close to… Ayesleigh. Would travel in that little in between bit you see on the map between us and Rivain. Either way, I don't mean to offend but I assume you're not particularly well versed in Dalish customs?” 

He was stunned for a moment, the pain though his body almost causing distraction, but he did manage a shake in the head. 

*No, I thought not.” Avantika took a long sip, sighing at the warmth of her coffee before continuing. “The Dalish have a funny custom, you see, when it comes to mages. Unlike most, we don't shun magic, but that comes with a little caveat. The clan depends on how many mages you find amongst them. Some… tones! Others, well they like to be safe.” Another long, drawn out pause as Avantika watched a gondola pass by. Illario could feel a vessel pop in his nose, the red essence of life slowly dragging down his face, seemingly unnoticed by the woman.

“I was born into one of those paranoid clans. To my luck, my magic came early. Now, they don't exactly Want a child to potentially get possessed, nearly impossible to stop that. Also, the potential of attracting humans, no we don't want that either.” Avantika shook her head, that wild hair falling in front of her eyes.

“So… of course this is a tradition you don't exactly tell the children. Maker forbid you instil fear into their little hearts. So, around my fifth year of living, they gave me a pack, some extra clothes, and asked me to go forage.” For the first time, Illario could hear Avantika's voice get caught in her throat, eyes becoming misty. 

“I never saw them again… and let me tell you… a five year old elf does not fare well in the wilds on her own. I didn't know where I was, where I was going. I could barely keep myself alive. I was terrified, terrified that the family I knew just gave up on me. Left me behind due to something I couldn't control. That's when Viago found me, nearly starved and shaking. Funny enough, he had been travelling to one of his contracts when his horse became lame. Said if I could help him with some of the plant life around the woods, he would put me out of my misery. I helped him make new poisons, and he brought me here.” 

Illario heard that catch in her throat again as she gave a sad smile. Without even looking at the man before her, she whipped out a handkerchief, dabbing his nose. 

Illario could see now his skin began to discolour, bruises botching the skin exposed. Yet as his eyes begged silently for anyone around them to notice, nobody seemed to care. So Rook went on. 

“Viago gave me a family I never had. Embraced who I was, even if I was an Idiot. So… imagine how I felt when I found out Lucanis, a man who had no control over what he was born into, was shunned by his own.” For the first time in this entire meeting, Avantika’s expression fully matched, her voice once lighthearted now laced with venom as her eyes stared what he could only describe as death incarnate into his soul. 

“A man who trusted you, thought of you as a brother. Family, and you tossed him aside. Sold him out and, because of you, had him endure those tortures of the Ossuary. Because of you, he has to live with knowing a man he loved, saw him as nothing but an obstacle. But guess what? In a way I got to do exactly what Viago did for me. I found him, and I gave him a family.” 

That look of disgust morphed once more, just the mention of Lucanis softening Avantika’s features. 

“Just like Viago I did not shun him for what he was, what he couldn't control. With time, I let him know he did not need to heal alone. That he didn't have to face a world that abandoned him alone. The funniest part, too.” Rook let out a near breathless laugh. “Solas, he trapped me in that prison in the Fade. It was like all of what I had experienced as a child came back. Alone, terrified, afraid. Ripped apart from the world. And in all of that shit… Lucanis pulled me back.” 

Illario could see a single tear run down Avantika’s cheek, her smile still remaining as she watched a bloodied tear run down Illario’s now purplish face. 

“I saved him… and he saved me. We both showed each other a world that we don't have to endure alone. I will never be able to pay back that debt. The only way I can, is to give him the love and security he had ripped away by you.

“So, with that. I'll end my ramble. Sorry, thanks for listening so well. But I do have one more thing to say, before I go. I don't want there to be any misunderstanding between us.” Her tone was kind as she leaned across the table, that dame tone becoming low and threatening. A voice Illario would hear in his nightmares to come. 

“If you ever think about hurting Lucanis, betraying Lucanis, or any of the other Crows, I will kill you. It will jot be quick. It will be slow… painful… and you will be alone. You will be alone and as your broken voice screams out for help as you choke on your own blood and bile, you will realise as you die the love you tossed away. That which saved me and Lucanis, will never be given to you. Do I make myself clear?” 

Illario could barely move any of his body, the pain excruciating as if he was melting from the inside. But he did not, trying to manage a gurgled yes as blood and black viscous liquid sputtered past his lips. 

Then, he was gifted one of Avantika's trademarked smiles, the woman reaching out to pat his cheek. 

“I'm really glad we could come to this understanding, Illario. I don't want there to be any misunderstanding between us.” Reaching to the jewellery circling her neck, she seemed to unclipped one of the baubles, tipping it into her coffee and passing him the cup before standing. 

“I hope we can see each other soon. I'm sorry I can't stay longer, like I mentioned, that can't stay away phase. I'll see you soon! You don't mind footing the bill?” 

Illario willed whatever energy he had to endure the pain and drink from the cup. The bitter liquid running down his blistered throat. For a moment he felt that death was breathing down his neck, but soon he felt his very veins become cold, as if thinning and repairing the damages. He could feel his throat open as he gasped for that sacred air. 

Blinking away what blood was left in his eyes, he noticed Rook already gone, leaving him to collect his sanity at the table alone.