#LUCKILY tomorrow pretty much all we gotta do is take a shower and do some easy solo tasks + book club (fun).

[queer-omens-in-the-archives]

so so soo so so tired. im gonna get ready for bed and then write a tiny bit (empire ch7 + epilogue are calling me) but i think even with all that we might still be conked out by 1am (in about 3hours) which is. hfjdn? ahjfnf.

[misora-msby]

embarrassing moments with inarizaki

inarizaki always looks so cool but you know they’re actually dorks and i am here to provide you the content to show theyre clowns. enjoy the headcanons :)

Kita Shinsuke

firstly. kita shinsuke being embarrased? making a mistake? unheard of.

he’s a perfect man and we all know it.

anyways

you two were having a nice dinner out together. 

it was a pretty fancy place so you decided to dress in a different style today

but you were beginning to wonder if kita liked it or not because he seemed to keep looking past your shoulder instead of at you

he was an observant guy so you were wondering if something had happened behind you

but you couldn’t hear anything weird so you assumed not

you decided to just stay quiet about it at first but now it was beginning to become annoying! 

why wasn’t he looking you in the eye to speak?

midway through your dinner, kita finally spoke up tho

“y/n, your shirt is slipping... yer bra’s showing.”

oh.

right. you were wearing your off-shoulder top.

“o-oh. shin, it’s that kind of shirt, you know?” you had to explain your outfit to ur bf with a pink face.

“oh... that so... well it’s cold these days so if yer feelin’ cold lemme know. i’ll give ya my jacket.”

GOD HES SO PERFECT KITA SHINSUKE I HOPE U MARRY HIM???????

Ojiro Aran

another man with next to no flaws.

but nature says everyone has to make some mistake.

so it was a regular school day, our aran has just come to class from morning practice and there’s still some time left until class starts.

all the girls in class are gathered around a table

he’s not sure why, it’s probably watching an idol video

but ur man wants to be a little romantic!!

plus he just showered so he smells Great uwu

he goes over and hugs you from behind, placing his chin on ur head.

“hey, bb whatcha ya doin”

all the girls gasp.

he doesn’t get whats wrong, it’s not like it’s a secret y’all are dating

pda to this level aint bad either

especially compared to his teammate miya atsumu

“ojiro aran.”

why is your voice behind him

he looks down and nearly faints when he sees he hugged the wrong girl.

to be fair she looked a lot like you from behind, just maybe 1cm shorter.

“i’m so sorry!” he keeps apologising to literally everyone and all the class is giggling bc they never seen their school’s ace so red before.

“didn’t think i’d come back from the toilet and see my bf cheatin”

“IT WAS A MISTAKE! I’M SERIOUS! Y/N U KNOW I LOVE YA!” 

hes so funny i swear

the volleyball team hears of it and it gets even better 

Miya Atsumu

it’s not a secret that miya atsumu, setter of the inarizaki volleyball team and invited to national youth training camp, had a gf

he was very much in love with u 

the whole class knew it because he’d show it off whenever he could too

so here comes valentines day

last year he received like... 50 different gifts from girls and guys aiming to win his love.

you didnt even give him one lmAOOOOO 

but this year, he had been not so subtly trying to hint that “i better not receive any chocolates this year when i’ve got a gf!”

he reaches school and plops into his seat.

there’s an anonymous box of chocolates with “please accept my love, miya-kun! <3″ on it

“the hell’s this?!”

“oh? chocolates?” - osamu who just popped his head into the class to shove into his twin’s face how much chocolate he got.

especially since the blond was off limits, the grey-haired twin had a bigger following now.

“do they not know i have a girlfriend...”

“well, ya might as well eat it. ya dont know who to return it to.”

“that’s like receivin’ their love!”

“no it ain’t. it’s just food.”

atsumu couldn’t argue with that and popped a piece in.

it was very delicious. the chocolate practically melted on his tongue and was the perfect sweetness and was filled with a delicious ganache too.

it was perfect

but he couldn’t accept this!

“it ain’t even good. too sweet and the filling’s sticky.”

“ah. really? is that what you think, tsumu?” you ask from the door where you had been watching the exchange take place.

“y/n! look at this! some weirdo gave me some choco and like... samu said to test it but i’ll toss it out, promise.”

“tsumu, i made that... i wrote it anonymously because i thought you’d know it was me and i wanted to tease you a little.”

“huh.”

osamu: “yeah actually i went over to her place to teach her how to make it.”

atsumu: “you said you went to suna’s place?!”

osamu: “i went there later but i first went to help her.”

you: “anyways if it’s not good i don’t mind if you toss it out...”

tsumu: “NO NO BABE I PROMISE IT’S GOOD”

you: “you just said-”

“BABE I SWEAR IT’S GOOD I JUST DIDN’T WANT TO ACCEPT A STRANGER’S STUFF”

“you’re always so honest though... are you sure?” you were having your fun teasing him now.

“BB PLSSSSSS”

he still cringes at the memory 4 years into ur marriage

Miya Osamu

osamu would DEFINITELY make home made dinner dates a regular thing.

this alone shows he’s the better twin - miya atsumu stan

he loves cooking and eating with you so sometimes when he’s got a day off you guys’ll set aside the afternoon to make a real nice dinner

imagine candlelit dinner with miya dorito body osamu in a suit

of course some fun stuff happens after too ;)))

and today’s your third anniversary!!

so osamu adds lots of ‘natural aphrodisiacs’ to the meal

i’m talkin

garlic bread and soup for an appetiser, a nice juicy steak with garlic and red wine sauce for the main, and chocolate coated strawberries for dessert

mm yummy

you two cleaned your plates completely (it was very delicious) and as you were washing the dishes, osamu comes up behind and wraps his arms around your waist

“yes, ‘samu?” 

“i’ve already prepared us a nice bath with yer favourite scents.” he’s got his head resting on ur chin

“really? thank you~ i’ll be there in a bit”

but he doesn’t let go of you while you’re still scrubbing at the baking sheets.

“osamu, you can let go for now.”

“don’t feel like it.”

“i gotta wash the dishes since you did most of the cooking.”

“mmm, i’ll do it if ya gimme a kiss.”

you roll ur eyes bc what a cutie 

u turn ur head to give him a kiss but suddenly he 

he burps

that garlicy wine smell is just kinda there

“ew! ‘samu!!”

his face is real red but he’s also trying not to laugh because he’s still a dude and this is absolutely hilarious to him

“want another?” he starts teasing

“i’m not getting in the bath with you.”

“wait wait wait i’m sorry, i’ll go brush my teeth and give you a proper kiss”

Suna Rintarou

you two were taking the train home today

it was quite late due to practice going a little longer than usual, so he insisted he walked you back home today.

sunarin can be a good boyf sometimes ok

it was getting a little crowded on the train tho, since people were heading home or going out for dinner

luckily you had already grabbed seats so you were quite comfortable sitting side by side. 

you and suna have the type of relationship were you dont have to talk all the time

silence is v comfy.

he’s just scrolling through twitter on his phone while you’re looking around the car, lost in ur thoughts

suddenly you notice an old lady standing a little bit away from you and you stand up

“baa-san, please take my seat.” you whisper in the crowded carriage

“oh how kind of you. thank you, dearie.” she smiles and takes your seat while you stand in front of her and suna instead.

suna doesn’t realise this exchange has happened tho

(he’s on his phone as usual)

probably starting some fights on twitter

he decides to try to be a little romantic and pretends to stretch his arm around (who he thought was) you.

“rin.” 

why is your voice right in front of him?

“young man, i appreciate it but i’m married.”

suna jumps as he sees someone he did not recognise next to him.

he looks up and notices you had moved.

you’re giggling

the granny’s giggling

atsumu and osamu sitting opposite on the carriage look like they’re going to cry because they’re trying not to laugh

“i was just stretching. really.” he mumbles and crosses his arms, face red as a tomato

he’s so embarrassed.

Ginjima Hitoshi

sometimes the inarizaki vbc would go for an after practice snack at the nearby family mart

they were really hungry after an intense preparation for nationals which was in two weeks so kita insisted they all get something to fill them up on the way home

but lucky lucky ginjima hhehe

you (his classmate who he had a crush on) were working at the cash register today.

“welcome!” you greet everyone as they enter

he cant help but stiffen up a bit 

why are u so cute and cheery today

the 2nd years already know what to do.

“heyy, i think last week i bought ya that ramen right? ya owe me my konbini snacks today!” - atsumu

“yeah. you lost a bet to me last week so u gotta pay up. a pack of jelly fruit sticks please.” - suna

“forgot my money today, mind payin’ for my snacks too?” - osamu

“like hell i’m paying for all of you. especially you, osamu. you eat too much all the time.” 

aran’s noticed what’s going on,

“hey, if it’s just for today you can do it right? if ‘samu don’t pay ya back tomorrow i’ll nag him ‘til he does.” 

“fine...” his basket is full when he goes to the counter.

he’s trying his best not to have a red face while watching u scan the items, ur hair swaying slightly as u look back and forth between the objects and the screen.

“alright. 4,890 yen please!” GOD he hated how expensive it was, that’s almost all his weekly allowance but bc it’s u and ur voice saying it it’s kinda ok

“mm, ok.” he still has his eyes on you while he takes out his wallet and puts it on the counter.

yes

his wallet, not the money

“...” “...”

“excuse me, sir. this is...”

he almost slaps his face wtf he’s so embarrassed.

“s-sorry. just a little absent minded after practice.” he starts pulling out his cash.

“it’s fine! i know how hard you guys practice!” you smile while performing the rest of the transaction and pass him his big bag of goods. “good luck for nationals, ginjima-kun!”

he almost runs out of the store and is about to fight the rest of the 2nd years for watching and (suna) recording

[lovemeleo]

hii! could you write some o'knutzy fluff?

hey anon, hope you’re doing well and hope you enjoy this little bit of o’knutzy fluff! o’knutzy of course belongs to @lumosinlove.

***

Moving to a completely new part of the country is extremely difficult. Not only are you miles and miles from where you called home for so long, but you’re away from your friends and family too. That was so difficult for Leo. Being in a different climate was extremely hard as well. Gryffindor was extremely different from New Orleans, where the lowest they got during winter was the 40s.

One of the biggest struggles Leo had was the lack of plants. This probably sounded weird, coming from a hockey player but ever since he was little, Leo loved growing things. He loved getting to put a little seed in the ground, watch it grow, and take care of it. It was even better when he got to use what he grew afterward. Leo loved growing different types of peppers, tomatoes, but he loved just growing regular plants as well. Whenever he wasn’t working, in school, or practicing, he could be found in the garden, fingers deep in the fresh dirt.

Sadly when he moved to Gryffindor and in with Finn, he had to give up his garden. They didn’t have a yard, and even if they did, it would be hard to have anything outside with the rapidly changing weather. His mom had been taking care of his garden back home, sending pictures but it wasn’t the same.

After showing his boys his garden when they visited his home, the two began formulating a secret plan. It was obvious their boyfriend missed his garden, missed the plants. It started with lots of research and planning. Finn and Logan spent so much time on gardening websites, asking experts questions, months of looking through plants that would be able to live in their area.

“We need to make sure they’re the plants that can live within Gryffindor,” Finn murmured, biting at his thumbnail as they scrolled through a local greenery’s website. 

Logan’s hand came up, pulling the older boy’s hand from his mouth as he looked over the plants, “Stop biting, you’re gonna bleed. And we can do some pepper plants. Tomatoes. Maybe some garlic, that’d be cool.”

Nodding, Finn added the plants to their cart, “The planter we bought has two levels. So we could do one level with like food plants and one with just regular plants? We’ve got that Fiddle Leaf Fig or whatever, and a couple of others. I think that’ll be good.”

“With the food ones, I think we should just buy the seeds and leave spots open. Leo might want to plant them himself.” Logan said, adding some seed packets to their cart before they paid. 

Leo had left to go home that morning for his mom’s birthday, planning to be back Sunday morning. It was now Friday afternoon and the two boys planned to have Leo’s garden ready when he got home. 

Their order wasn’t ready until Saturday, so as soon as the greenery opened the next day, the boys went and picked it all up. After getting all the plants as well as the needed supplies to their apartment, Logan and Finn got to work. They had purchased an indoor garden that stacked with two shelves that were spread enough to let the bottom shelf still grow tall. 

It took them almost all day to get it all set up. For the food shelf, they filled it with dirt but left the seed packets to the side. The other shelf was filled with different plants that had purified the air as well as some that just looked nice. The boys set up next to their balcony window so it could get sunlight.

Finn let out a sigh of relief as they looked over their finished product, “Well, fuck that was a lot. Don’t know how Leo used to do that every day, especially in the heat. Probably all tan… and sweaty.” His face took on a bit of a dreamy look before Logan swatted at him.

“Now is not the time for that, Harz. We still gotta clean up before gets home tomorrow.” 

A whine was Finn’s only reply as they started to clean, getting the extra dirt off the floor and putting away the additional supplies in their storage closet. 

After a quick shower, both boys stumbled to their bedroom, crawling into bed.

“It’s weird sleeping in here when one of us is missing,” Logan mumbled, his face already pressed into Leo’s pillow. Finn nodded into his back, his head resting against the soft skin of Logan’s shoulder as he closed his eyes.

“He’ll be back tomorrow. Then we can show him the surprise,” Finn said softly, pressing a kiss to his neck as he pulled Logan closer. “Sleep now.”

The boys were up early the next morning, getting the house was ready. They had to be at the airport to pick Leo up at 10 am and wanted to make sure everything was in order when he got home.

“I’m gonna throw the laundry in the dryer and then we can head to the airport,” Logan yelled to Finn who was picking up the kitchen. And by picking up, he was mostly tossing out empty to-go containers. Not much cooking got done when Leo was gone.

As soon as the last container was tossed, Finn was pulling on his jacket, “Alright, let’s go. Don’t want our sunshine out in the cold for too long.” Logan was following not long after, grabbing his keys and wallet before they were out the door. 

Luckily for them, traffic wasn’t bad and they made it just in time; Leo walked out the airport doors as they pulled up.

“It’s unfair how fucking tan he is.” Finn huffed, a pout on his face but anyone could tell he loved how tan Leo got, especially when he went home.

A grin lit up Leo’s face as soon as he saw them, quickly walking to the car and climbing in the backseat, “Hello, mes amours. Missed you.” He said, quickly leaning forward to press a kiss to each of their cheeks as Logan headed home.

“We missed you more, mon soleil. How was your mom’s birthday?” Logan asked, unable to stop himself from glancing back at their boyfriend through the rearview mirror. Fuck, he really did look good.

Leo smiled, resting his head back on the headrest, “Good, very good. She sends her love to the both of you.” 

“But more to me, right? I’m her favorite, non?” Logan said with a grin, glancing at the redhead next to him.

Finn shoved him, almost causing Logan to swerve, “That was before she met you. Now she knows what a shit you are.”

The car was filled with the sounds of their scuffle as Logan tried to fight Finn back while also keeping their car on the road. Leo couldn’t help the fond smile that spread on his face as he watched the two of them. Yeah, he had missed this.

When they got home, Logan and Finn turned to look at him as they got to their front door. Leo raised an eyebrow as he looked between the two of them, “What are y’all looking at it? Sorta creepy just staring at me like that…”

“We have a surprise for you,” Finn said, unable to stop the happy bounce as Logan opened the door. And there it was. His new little garden right in front of their big balcony window.

“W-what?” Leo said, eyes wide as he took in the new addition to their apartment.

Logan bit his lip nervously, “So we saw how much you loved your garden in New Orleans, and we wanted you to have one here…”

“So we decided to make your own little garden. The ones that are already planted are just like regular plants? Some of them purify the air, but others we just got cause we thought they looked pretty.” Finn continued, his anxious excitement causing him to ramble a bit. “We left the other shelf empty because we figured you might want to plant the food ones yourself, but we got a bunch of seeds!”

Leo walked forward, his fingers running gently over the edge of the garden shelves, “I can’t believe you guys did this for me...” He felt his vision blur a bit as he looked up at his boys, wiping at the tears that were forming as his face split into a massive grin. “You guys are too good to me.”

Quickly pulling the other two for a group hug, Finn held the two of them close, “Well, Nutter Butter, you deserve all of the good things.”

All of the planning, research, and digging in the dirt was all so worth it to see that blinding smile on Leo’s face. They’d do it million times, again and again, to keep it there. 

[eleventhdoctorsangel]

Can you hear me screaming please don’t leave me

Summary: Bobby Nash and his niece were always really close. But on one fateful day he and his team were called to her house after her suicide attempt. After saving her his niece decided to go in the same line as work.

“You behaved yourself I’m proud of you.” I said. Buck just glared at me. “Oh come on you know you love me.” I teased.  I looked over to see that Eddie was putting stuff away next to us. Uncle Bobby walked pasted us and patted Eddie on the shoulder. “That was a good call Eddie.” Uncle Bobby said as he passed Eddie. “Thanks cap.” Eddie said as he closed the door to where he was putting stuff away. “Nice job.” Chimney said as he passed us. Buck had closed the door to where we putting stuff away making his way passed Eddie. “Yeah. Good call.” Buck said as he walked past Eddie. “I would give him a little time. I think he’s just not used to another cute guy. I think he feels threaten.” I said. Eddie let out a laugh. “I think you might be right.” Eddie said. “Come on you two.” Uncle Bobby said. “We listen to Cap.” Eddie said. I nodded and made my way over to the other side of the truck where the doors are. Eddie followed me and opened the door for me. “Thanks.” I said giving him a smile as I climbed into the truck. I got back into my same seat I was in when we were on the way here. Buck again glared at me as I took my seat. I gave him a weird look in return. “What?” I asked. “Nothing.” Buck said as he looked away from me. “Okay grumpy gus.” I said rolling my eyes.

The rest of my shift was as normal as it could be. Well according to Uncle Bobby. I changed out of my work and put my street clothes. I grabbed my bag and left they women locker room. As I left the locker room I passed Eddie. “So how did you like your first shift?” Eddie asked. “Pretty tamed to be honest.” I said laughing a little. “Well it won’t always will be like that.” Eddie said. “Yeah every day can’t be like today. I know there will be days were it will be nonstop.” I said. “Well you probably want to head home.” Eddie said. “Well I don’t mind staying and talking for a while. But if you need to get home to Christopher I understand.” I said. “I think I should get home to see Christopher.” Eddie said. “I understand that. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” I said giving him a smile. “Yeah see you tomorrow Y/n.” Eddie said. “See you tomorrow.” I said walking away and out of the station to my car. I got my keys out of my purse unlocking my door. I opened the door to my car throwing my bag into the passenger seat along with my purse. I buckled in then put my key into the ignition I turned on my car. I pulled out of the parking lot of the station. I drove back to the house that I recently moved into. Luckily Uncle Bobby and Buck had helped me move in. The house has three bedrooms, two bathrooms, a decent size kitchen, a living room, a two car garage and a decent size back yard.  I opened my garage door and pulled in and closed my garage door. I turned off my car and pulled the key out of the ignition. I grabbed my bag and purse then opened the car door getting out then closed the door. As I walked closer to the door leading into the house I got hear my dog marshmallow scratching on the door. I unlocked and opened the door. Marshmallow ran up to me jumping on my legs. I laughed and picked her up from the ground. She started licking my face making me laugh. “Alright come on you must be hungry.” I said as I put her back down on the ground. As I walked in the house she was at my heels. I sat down my bag and purse near the door.  I went to go feed and water marshmallow. As she ate I started to fix me something to eat. I pulled my phone from my pocket and unlocked it outing on one of my many playlist then put it on the counter.

I decided to make some pasta. As the water was boiling I started to hum to the music I went to grab the noodles. The music stopped at my phone started to ring. I went over to my phone and sat the noodles down next to my phone. I looked to see who was calling me and it was Buck. I answer it and brought it up to my ear.  “Hey Buck what’s up?” I said. “I just saw my sister naked.” Buck said. “I’m sorry.” I said. “I saw my sister naked. So you know how I’m staying at Abby’s place for the time being.” Buck said. “Yeah.” I said. “Well when I got back. I saw luggage’s and heard the shower. So I thought it was her.” Buck said. “I got I don’t need that image in my head.” I said. Buck started to laugh. “Oh come on you know you want that in your head.” Buck said. “No buck I don’t.” I said laughing a little. “So what are you doing?” Buck asked. “Just making me something to eat.” I said. “Yum what are you making?” Buck asked. “Just pasta.” I said. “Well with Bobby as your Uncle I bet you can every make pasta taste good.” Buck said. “Thanks Buck. So what you going to make?” I asked as I picked up the noodles and went to put them in the water. “I don’t know I might just fix some scrambled eggs.” Buck said. “Who are you talking to Evan?” I heard a female voice say. “Y/n. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” Buck said. “Alright Buck I’ll see you tomorrow.” I said. I hung up and smiled as I shook my head. I finished my food and got my food plated I went over to my table as sat it down then I when to get something to drink. When I came back to the table I saw Marshmallow sitting down net to the chair looking up at the table. “Oh no sorry baby you can’t have any.” I said as I sat down. But she continued to look at me. “I’m not giving you any.” I said. Marshmallow let out a huff as she laid down on the floor.

Once I got done I went to take my dirty dishes to the sink then went to go put the leftover food away. After putting the left over away I put the dirty pan into the sink also. I started to play music again as I washed the dirty dishes and then put them in the dishwasher. After I got the dishwasher loaded I went to clean up around the kitchen.

When I got done cleaning up I decided to get some laundry done since I need to get some done. While the load of clothes were going thru the washer I grabbed the laundry basket that had laundry that needed to be folded and brought it into the living room and sat it down next the couch. I sat down and turn on the TV and put some supernatural on. Marshmallow jumped on the couch and lay down next to me as I started to fold what was in the basket.

I finished folding what was in the basket just as when the clothes in the washer needed to be switched over to the dryer. It had taken me a bit longer to fold because I got distracted by supernatural a few times. I switched the clothes over and started another load. I got done with that I walked back into the living room and grabbed some of the clothes. As I was putting my clothes I heard my phone ringing. I rushed over grabbing my phone from the couch to see who was calling me this time. It was Buck again.

“Buck I swear if you tell me about seeing your sister naked I will end you. Okay Bucky bear I will end you.” I said as I answered his call. “Okay you and I both know that you wouldn’t hurt a fly. Besides you’re so tiny. Which is why I’m going to help you get some muscles on those noodle arms of yours.” Buck said. “Okay first of all I don’t have noodle arms their weak nerd arms.” I said. “Okay weak nerd arms then. Bring some workout clothes with you when you come in tomorrow.” Buck said. “Uggg but that sound like hard work. I’m happy with my weak nerd arms. Why must you put me through some much tortured? Here I thought you loved me.” I said. “I do love you. You know that. All I’m say is that a few workouts won’t hurt you. We gotta stay fit in this line of work.” Buck said. “And I’m not fit now? You’re cutting kinda deep there Bucky bear.” I said. “I didn’t mean it like that.” Buck said. “Buck I’m messing with you. With as long has you’ve known me I would have think you be able to tell when I’m messing with you.” I said laughing. “I so knew you were messing with me the whole time.” Buck said laughing too. “Whatever helps you sleep at night Buck.” I said. “So what are you up to?” Buck asked. “Just watching some supernatural and getting caught up with my laundry.” I said. “You’re watching it without me how dare you.” Buck said pretending to act upset. “Clam down I’m watching episodes that we’ve already watched. Beside I’ve watching this for a while now I only just now got you into it.” I said. “And it has ruined my life so thank you.” Buck said. “Hey I tried to warn you.” I said. “It’s getting kinda of late I should probably go to sleep.” Buck said. ‘Yeah I’ll probably wait until I put my last load in the dryer then go to sleep.” I said. “You better.” Buck said. “Yes dad.” I said laughing. “I’ll see you tomorrow Y/n.” Buck said. “See you tomorrow Bucky bear.” I said. “I love you. You know that right?” Buck said. “Yeah I know. I love you two Bucky bear.” I said. “Bye Y/n.” Buck said. “Bye Buck.” I said and hung up.

[leigh-kelly]

(More Hospital!AU)

Though Santana calmed down a little after her conversation with Brittany, she realizes that her anger with Kurt doesn’t fade. She doesn’t want to burden Brittany with it, not while she’s still recovering, and the last thing she wants to do is get Mercedes involved, so she bottles it all up. It scares her sometimes—well, all the time—how her emotions tend to eat her alive, and she fears running into Kurt in the hospital. All she can keep thinking is that he just doesn’t get it. There was a time where she’d drop everything to hang out with him, but now she has responsibilities that she just can’t drop...and she doesn’t want to.

Two weeks go by. Brittany is getting stronger every day, she’s hardly taking her Vicodin and she’s really killing it on the crutches. The Pierces get the house and they go back to Boston to pack up, but Santana feels okay that they’re running the house on their own. With the exception of bath time, Brittany has pretty much conquered everything on crutches. She cooks dinner, she cleans up the house and Santana is so grateful for it.

On the first day of the third week, there’s a knock on her office door. When she looks up, she sucks in a breath. It’s Kurt, and she’s still not really sure she’s ready to talk to him. He hurt her feelings, but she won’t do the weepy thing with him.

“Can I come in?” He asks, leaning against the door frame.

“I...yeah, I guess.”

“So...”

“Yeah.”

“Dave told me I was wrong.”

“And do you agree with him?” Santana raises an eyebrow.

“I...I don’t know.”

“So you came here to tell me you don’t know?”

“Yes. No. I honestly don’t know. You’re my best friend, Santana. I miss you.”

“Well I don’t have time for gallivanting in bars. I’ve got three kids, I’ve got an injured wife, I have to help my in laws move into their new house in a week.”

“You make time for Mercedes.” He mumbles.

“What was that?”

“I said you make time for Mercedes.”

“Because Mercedes recognizes that I have different priorities. Do you think the night Britt got hurt, I even thought about calling you to come watch the boys? No. You’ve made no bones about it that kids aren’t your thing.”

“I would have watched your kids.” Kurt defends. “But that doesn’t mean hanging out with you always has to be with them and Brittany.”

“What do you want me to do, Kurt? You don’t just get to pick and choose when you’re a mother.”

“Other mothers leave their kids at home once in a while.”

“Other mothers don’t have an infant son who might have cerebral palsy. Do you know how much of my mind is occupied by making sure Oliver is okay? That I’m not giving him too much attention and neglecting Liam and Max? You know better than anyone that my mind goes a hundred miles a second, now add the worries of motherhood into that equation.”

“I can’t say I get it, Santana. I don’t know what you’re going through.”

“You’re right, you don’t.”

“Then let me know. Half of the news I get about you, I get about Mercedes and another forty-five percent I get from gossiping interns. You don’t even bother to let me in anymore.”

“I...you’re right.”

“I want to be part of your life. I was hurt when you got married and I wasn’t there. I was hurt when you told Mercedes you were pregnant first. I guess I just feel like I don’t matter anymore.”

“Kurt.” Santana takes a breath. “You’re always going to matter to me.”

“I just...I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Kurt. I’d love to spend time with you, I just wish you didn’t hate my kids.”

“I don’t hate your kids at all. I love them, actually. I’m just not...good with them.”

“Just spend time with them. Come over and have dinner with us, without Mercedes, without anything else. I want to spend time with you, I just have..a lot on my plate right now.”

“Okay.” Kurt more. “I can do that.”

After Kurt leaves Santana’s office, she doesn’t feel like everything is resolved, but it’s a start. And maybe Kurt is right, maybe other mothers can take a step away, but it’s just not something she can do. She spends enough of her time away from her kids at work, she can’t imagine not being there for bedtime, she can’t imagine just...leaving them for something else.

The rest of her day is packed with surgeries. She wants it that way. She feels like Lauren Zizes is on her heels and she wants to be the best. Maybe it’s all in her head, maybe Zizes isn’t interested in competition...but they’re surgeons, so she probably is. After she finishes her last set of rounds for the day, she doesn’t even bother to change out of her scrubs. She’ll just go home and take a shower, have dinner with her family and relax.

When she gets to the house, it’s loud. Liam is shouting, the babies are crying and Brittany looks like she’s at the end of her rope. With one arm holding a crutch, the other cradles Max, trying to settle him and Santana immediately feels bad. Maybe she should have taken more time off, maybe she shouldn’t have left Brittany to deal with all of this while she should be healing. But she insisted she would be fine, she insisted that she didn’t need Maribel to come down and help. Still though...

“Hey honey.” Brittany smiles as she walks into the living room, a shock of hair fallen over her face. “You’re home.”

“I’m home and it looks like just in time.”

“Do you want to deal with babies or Liam?”

“I’ve gotta nurse, if you don’t mind handling Liam.”

“Nope, got it.” Brittany hands Max over to Santana and grabs her other crutch before hobbling into the kitchen where Liam sits on the floor screaming.

“Hi Maxie baby.” Santana coos down to him, then lifts Oliver from his seat. “What’s going on with my boys today, huh?”

“I don’t like it!” Liam screams from the kitchen. “Go away, Mama!”

“Li...” Brittany sighs. “I’m sorry we couldn’t go to the park, I really am.”

Santana’s heart breaks just a little at that. She knows Brittany wants to enjoy the kids while she’s home, but obviously, going to the park is just something she physically can’t do. And of course, it’s impossible to reason with a four year old, especially when he’s been cooped up in the house except on the weekends. It’s clear that Brittany is pained by the fact that she can’t do what she used to do and Santana just wonders if she should have taken more time, despite Brittany’s insistence that she shouldn’t.

“It’s not fair! I want to go!”

“Liam. I told you if you had good behavior today, we would see if Mommy could take you, but you didn’t have good behavior.”

“I don’t want you! I want Mommy Noodle!” He tears into the living room and hops up onto the couch, jostling the twins away from nursing and making them start wailing again.

“Liam.” Santana says firmly, hating when she has to and trying to settle Max and Oliver back on her breasts. “This behavior is not nice and you need to say you’re sorry to Mama right now.”

“No! No! No! No!”

“I’m sorry guys.” Santana murmurs down to Max and Oliver, slowly taking them off her and laying them down. They start to cry again and she has no idea if she’s making the right choice, but she needs to take Liam upstairs, needs to have him sit and regroup in his room. “Let’s go, we’re going upstairs.”

Carrying Liam up the stairs and feeling like her breasts are going to explode, Santana looks quickly over her shoulder at Brittany who has settled on the couch and is trying to soothe the little boys. Liam kicks and screams the whole way up and Santana realizes she hasn’t ever seen him like this. She thinks of something one of her patient’s moms had told her years earlier about the “fuck you fours” and she thinks this might be the epitome of that. Once she’s sitting on Liam’s bed with him, he tries to run out of the room, but she stands up and stops him.

“We’re staying here until we calm down.”

“I don’t want to!”

“I understand that, but when you’re not treating Mama nicely and you’re scaring your brothers, you have no choice.”

He screams and cries until he finally throws himself on the bed and collapses in total exhaustion. It’s early for him to go to bed, but Santana thinks that maybe he needs it. She’s sure Brittany has fed him dinner by now and she’ll just get up a little earlier to bathe him in the morning. Breathing in deeply, she goes back downstairs to where Brittany holds the whimpering twins in her arms.

“He’s sleeping.” Santana tells her, lifting up her shirt completely and taking Oliver, then Max to get them all some relief.

“He’s been like this all day. I just feel so...helpless.”

“I know, he never had a fit like that when I was on bed rest, but I know the feeling of being helpless.”

“I’m just ready for this to be healed. There’s ten million things I want to do that I can’t. Take Liam to the park, help my parents pack in Boston, go back to work...” Brittany buries her face in her hands and Santana aches for her. “I’m just...God, this is horrible but I need to get out of this house. I’m about to go back to work and at least sit in my office.”

“Is that what you want to do?”

“Who knows if Sue will even let me?”

“There’s no reason you can’t run your department. You’re all but off painkillers. Even if you just started with some shorter days. It would probably be good for you.”

“You don’t think it’s crazy?”

“I don’t.” Santana shakes her head. “I’d do the same thing. You know I would have, I begged Shelby to let me do anything. I’ll call my mom tonight and you can see if you can set up a meeting with Sue when I go in tomorrow, that way you only have to take a cab one way.”

“You really are the best, I hope you know that.”

After Santana and Brittany eat dinner, the twins finally soothed, Santana calls her mom while Brittany calls Sue. Maribel is understandably not as thrilled about Brittany going back to work, worried about how she’ll be able to rest and recover, but she agrees to come in the morning. Luckily for Brittany, Sue has a meeting open at eight the next morning, so she’ll go in with Santana, see how things go and then work from there.

After the phone calls, they spend some time with just Max and Oliver, laying on the floor and playing with them. Santana is always so carefully observing Oliver, seeing if he’s catching up, but she knows there’s some rigidity to his limbs. Contrary to his she felt before and at his appointment, she’s reconciled in her mind that it will be okay if he needs a little extra help, that she doesn’t love him any less or love herself any less if he has special needs. He’s one of her beautiful, wonderful, perfect boys and she’ll spend her whole life fighting for him to have the very best of everything.

“I talked to Kurt.” Santana murmurs as she picks up both boys to bring them up to bed. “I’m going to put them down for the night and then we’ll talk.”

Santana looks over her shoulder at Brittany settling in on the couch and she walks up the stairs with the boys. They’re both nearly asleep when she gets up there, but once she lays them down in the bassinet, she can’t help but look over them. Max’s fingers are in his mouth and Oliver has his hand over his eyes and she swells with love for them as they settle into their dreams. She thinks of how they’ll grow up always side by side, how Liam will watch over them and is so grateful for this life she has.

She leaves the room and checks on Liam, glad he’s still sleeping, before she heads back downstairs. Brittany is in the big chair and she has her feet up on the ottoman and Santana is so glad to see that she looks much more comfortable than she has in the weeks past. She sinks down onto the couch, close enough so she can touch her, and runs her hands through her hair.

“Long day.” Brittany says. “For both of us.”

“I’m sorry they were such a handful today.”

“It’s okay, Santana. We both know they have those days. But tell me what happened.”

“He came to my office. It was...kind of a lot. I don’t know, I have this weird guilt thing with him, I guess. He said Dave said he was wrong, but I don’t know, I think it’s more complicated than that.”

“What do you mean?”

“I guess it’s like...I don’t know, you become friends with someone when you’re one person and then you go through these evolutions and you’re just not the same anymore, I don’t know.”

“I think...” Brittany takes a breath and Santana thinks she’s really considering her words. “Okay, I think that friendships evolve with you, I don’t know. Like you two have been friends since med school, you getting married and having kids shouldn’t change that.”

“He was really hurt that we got married without telling him and that Mercedes knew I was pregnant first.”

“I can understand that on some level.” Brittany nods. “But he also knows you have anxiety and have to do things your own way.”

“Do you not think I should forgive him?”

“No, I’m not saying that at all. I’m just saying that I don’t want you coming out of this thinking you’re in the wrong.”

“I’m not, I promise. He started about how other mothers leave their kids to go out with their friends and I...just can’t do that, I told him that. We leave them to go to work and once in a blue moon for a date night, but I love being here for bedtime, I don’t know.”

“What did he say to that?”

“He said he’d come over and spend time with us. Also that he doesn’t hate our kids. So that’s a start, right?”

“I think that’s a really good start.”

“It was easy when we were young, you know? We were all single and getting drunk after twelve hour shifts. But that being said, I wouldn’t trade what I have now for being young. I wasn’t happy, not really.”

“I know, honey. Lately, you’ve been less anxious than you have been since I’ve known you. You’ve found your stride and it looks really good on you.”

“For someone who never thought they’d have kids, I sure am into it.”

“And maybe that’s part of what’s going on with Kurt, you were both kind of on the same page about where your life was going to go and you changed your mind. That’s hard.” Brittany reaches over and takes Santana’s hand.

“I guess, I don’t know, Britt, it’s hard.”

“I know, and it’s okay if you want to stop talking about it.”

“I do. Have you decided if you want to go to Boston?”

“I mean, I feel like we should, I just don’t know what kind of help I’m going to be.”

“Your parents understand if you need to relax. I mean, especially if Sue lets you go back to work. You’ll probable be exhausted by the weekend. And when they get here, we’ll go out to Long Island, I’ll unpack with them.”

“Yeah.” Brittany sighs. “I guess it’s still just a thing for me about Liv’s stuff, I want to make sure it’s okay.”

“They’re going to take care of it, it means as much to them as it does to you.”

“No, I know, you’re right. I’ll tell them tomorrow that we’re not going to go. They said they had it under control. Sorry, I’m just...whatever.”

“It’s okay to be like that, it’s a lot.”

“I know my mom told you I never got to grieve. And she’s right. I’ve got a lot of stuff to unpack.”

“You know you can do it with me, right?”

“I know.” She nods. “It’s just still hard for me to process the way she died. And the fact that she’d overcome so much. She wished for a life where she was happy with a family of her own and she was just getting started. She deserved so much more. I don’t know, we’re new at our family thing and it scares me a little.”

“Like it’ll all be taken away?”

“I don’t know, maybe I just don’t feel like I deserve it. I know you go through that sometimes.”

“But you’ve always been the one who tells me I do. And I’m going to tell you the same.”

“I don’t think I ever got to thank you, you know, for letting me name Oliver after her.”

“You don’t have to thank me. I feel like he has a special guardian angel, I don’t know. I don’t normally believe in that stuff.” Santana shakes her head.

“I don’t either, but yeah, I feel that. I just always think about how she would have been so calm about the whole thing.”

“Britt, you’re so calm about the whole thing. You’ve been a rock while I’ve freaked out. But I feel like we’re in a good place with it now.”

“I can tell. We’ve got this, whatever comes along.”

“I know.”

Santana watches TV with Brittany for a little while and then she showers and they go up to bed. Santana is surprised how infrequently the twins wake up throughout the night and she savors the extra sleep. It may be restless, since she’s still not taking her pills, but she sleeps. When she gets up in the morning, she’s surprisingly refreshed and she rolls over, seeing that both boys are up and gurgling contentedly in the bassinet. Brittany is already out of bed, she hears the shower running, and Santana picks both of them up to nurse. While they do, she thinks about how surprised she is that Liam is still sleeping, but she’s glad he’s getting the rest he needs.

Once the babies are fed, she lays them back down and gets dressed. She slips into the bathroom to wash up and brush her teeth, then she carries them into Liam’s room. He’s slowly opening his eyes and a Santana just looks at her oldest son. He’s had a tough day yesterday, but he’s still just the sweetest boy, and she sits down beside him with Max and Oliver in her arms.

“Hi, Mommy Noodle.” He murmurs sleepily, not opening his eyes.

“Hi, Sir.” She smiles, leaning over to kiss him on the head. “How are you feeling this morning?”

“I feel like I’m ready to go to the park. Can you take me?”

“I have to go to work, but Grandma Maribel is coming over and I bet she’d be glad to take you.”

“What about Mama?”

“Mama’s going to come with me to talk to Dr. Sue this morning. But I promise you this, tomorrow is Saturday and I’ll definitely take you to the park then.”

“Hmmm...okay, what about Maxie and Ollie?”

“They’ll come with us. And we’ll see how Mama’s feeling, maybe she can come too.”

Once her promise is made to Liam, Santana brings the three boys downstairs and puts a waffle in the toaster for her oldest. Brittany comes down the stairs, one crutch under her arm, and Santana smiles at her. Brittany looks beautiful, dressed up for her meeting with Sue and a big smile on her face. With everything that went on with her parents and then her leg, Brittany hasn’t worn that smile of hers in too long, so Santana goes over to her and kisses her, just soaking it all in.

Brittany is chatty on the way to the hospital and Santana is so happy to talk to her, she almost doesn’t want to get out of the car. But they get there and Santana kisses her again outside her office and goes to meet her first patient. She knows she has back to back surgeries all day so she won’t be able to check in with Brittany for awhile, but she hopes that things go well with Sue, she hopes her wife can come back to the hospital and feel like she can breathe again.

The day feels like it lasts forever, and when Santana finally gets back to her office at the end of the day, realizing that she hasn’t pumped in six hours and her breasts feel like they’re going to fall off, Brittany is sitting on the couch and smiling at her. She’s so happy to see her wife’s smiling face that she immediately pulls her in for a kiss.

“You’re back?”

“I’m back.” Brittany grins. “Sue said I know my body and if I feel like I can work, I can work. It’ll be a few weeks before I can go back to surgery, but I’ll take just being here and running my team.”

“That’s amazing, Britt. I’m so glad it went well!”

“Are you okay? You keep rubbing your breasts.”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just haven’t pumped in basically forever. I’d love to wait to get home and just feed the boys, but I feel like I might actually die if I don’t get some milk out of me. Do you mind?”

“Honey, do what you have to do. I checked in with your mom a little while ago and things are all good over there.”

“I’ve gotta be better about this. My milk is going to dry up if I keep waiting so long to pump.” Santana sighs, closing the door and grabbing her breast pump from her bag.

“How do you feel about that?”

“What?”

“Your milk drying up? I mean I know nursing and working full time has been a lot on you.”

“You know...I honestly don’t know. I told myself I was going to do it for a year, especially for Oliver, but finding time to pump just feels like it’s impossible. I know they have to give it to me, but also I can’t exactly stop in the middle of a surgery to do it. I don’t know.”

“Okay. You know that whenever you’re ready to stop, I’m okay with it, right?” Brittany asks, gently touching Santana’s shoulder.

“No, I know. I guess I’m ready to start thinking about it. It feels weird to say that out loud.”

“The boys are doing great, it’s amazing you’ve been able to keep this up this long.”

“Thank you. But seriously, I want to hear all about your day.”

“It was a lot of scheduling stuff, my team really stepped up while I was out, so there were no major fires to put out. And I was able to talk to some of my long term patients who are still here. It felt good, when I was at home, I didn’t feel...useful. I felt like Liam was always mad at me for not being able to do things, I don’t know.”

“I felt like that when I was home too, so I get it.” Santana nods. “But he loves you.”

“No, I know. And I miss all three of the boys today, but it also felt really good to be here.”

“Our second home.”

[wormstacheangel]

Almost: Ch. 3

Hello! It’s a happy ending story so don’t worry but I wanted to write more about Dean’s relationships with others. Read it on AO3 link (maybe leave a nice comment?)

Ch. 1 link | Ch. 2 link |

Summary:  Dean comes back from the long drive with Cas in need of some comfort. Sam is there to finally get him to talk out his feelings and admit to things he has been pushing down. Then he has to go face Cas the next day.

Word Count: 2920 More Under the Cut

“So, what?”

Dean was sitting on the floor behind the register of Charlie’s café. His head rested against her legs as she took orders, feeling too damn embarrassed to go home to face Sam or go to work and face Bobby. Charlie was the only other person who he was close to but she came into his life after Cas already left it.

“You’re just gonna hide here?” Charlie said before her customer service voice took over. “Hello! How can I help you?”

She took an order while Dean continued to munch on the brownie she has given him earlier. It wasn’t warm anymore but it was still damn good. He was glad he had a best friend who would let him eat his feelings and provided the food.

When she addressed him again she crouched down to smile sadly at him. He hated it. “Dean, I didn’t even know you liked anyone.”

“I didn’t fucken know I liked anyone either.” He groaned in annoyance as he threw his head back but it hurt as it hit some glass mugs. “Ow! Damn it, Charlie!”

“Don’t take your anger out on me!”

“I’m-I’m not! I’m just mad in general! At Cas being back. At me not over my damn high school crush. At dumb fucken Mick .” Dean let his head fall into his hands. “I’m 26, dude. I shouldn’t be dealing with this shit anymore.”

“What does age have to-?”

“I shouldn’t be having boy problems!” He pulls his head out of his hands to explain to her before he groaned again. Mumbling, “I’m too damn old for this shit.”

“Maybe if you focused more on the pretty girls like me then you wouldn’t be in this mess.” She jokingly nudged him as she sat on the floor beside him. Pulling him down so she can awkwardly hold him. “I think you just gotta be the mature one, Dean. He’s probably not staying for long anyway so how about you just go to the funeral like we planned and then we can forget that little Castiel walked back into our lives. Does that sound like a plan?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“That’s the spirit!” She dropped a kiss on top of his head. “Now, are you going to stay and hug my legs until closing?”

“Thinking about it.”

Charlie laughed but shoved him off when he dropped his full weight into her.

Dean did end up going home. He needed a hot shower and hoped to whatever god was listening that Sammy won’t come looking for him today because he knew Bobby would have called him. He knew Sam would be worried - Bobby would be too but won’t admit to it and Dean respected him for it - and he would come barging in with his emergency house key he made without permission. Then he would want Dean to talk.

Sam always wants Dean to talk.

A few months of not talking after suddenly losing his Mom and his best friend moving away and suddenly, ‘you’re someone who needs to be watched, Dean.’

Dean wouldn’t be damn surprised if there were hidden cameras in his apartment. At least he’s given whoever is watching a damn show every once in a while.

Luckily he took a hot shower in peace. His apartment was filled with music as he walked around his room to clean the already tidy space. His mind floating around to think of nothing in particular. Making himself not think of what happened. Not think of Cas. Not think of the damn kiss. Not think of his baby blue’s that still hold so much power over him. Not think of his dumb smile or horrible singing voice.

“Fuck!” Dean grabbed one of his pillows and buried his face into it. “Fuck you! Fuck you!”

“Dude,” Dean jumped as he heard the familiar voice behind him. Sam walked into his bedroom with beers in hand as well as a greasy brown paper bag. “Is that any way to talk to someone who brought you supplies?”

Dean dropped his pillow on his bed and passed Sam, bumping their shoulders together. “Fuck you. Stop letting yourself in.”

Sam let out a low chuckle but followed him to the small kitchen. “You weren’t going to let me in.”

“Cause you’re nosy, asshat. That’s why.”

They dropped into the kitchen chairs while Sam passed him his food, grinning like an idiot and annoying Dean to no end. Dean liked eating in silence but his brother wouldn’t stop looking at him and smiling. Like he’s hiding something or knows the damn secrets to the universe.

Dean was almost done with his second beer and half his fries when he kicks Sam’s chair. “Just fucking spit it out, Sammy!”

Sam sat up in his chair and leaned in closer to Dean as if he was about to share a secret. As if anybody else was in his apartment to hear them. “Guess who’s back in town?”

“Cas.” Dean quickly answers as he leans back in his chair, his feet resting up on one of the extra chairs, and takes a sip of his beer.

“How’d you-?” Sam blinks at him in shock before shaking his head. “Well, I bet you don’t know that he’s engaged to this guy named-”

“Mick.” Dean rolled his eyes as that name escaped his lips again. “Fucking asshole.”

Sam leans back on his chair, his face dropping into a scowl. “How do you fucking know that?”

Dean shrugs as he takes another fry and dips it in ketchup before chewing on it. Ignoring his brother’s waiting stare. “I just know things.”

“Fuck you.” Sam pushes Dean’s chair back in annoyance. Dean would want to do the same thing but Sam’s chair was now too far away for his legs to reach. “Who told you, dude?”

“Who told you ?” Dean asked back while he scoots back to the table.

“Gabriel. He came looking for Cas at the garage so he told Bobby and me. We also met the dude.”

“Dude? You mean Mick?”

“Yeah. He was pretty chill. He has an accent.”

“Accent?”

“British.”

“Fuck!” How was he even to compete with some fancy British dude? He’s seen the Great British Bake Off. Those people are nice. Cas deserved a nice person. “I don’t wanna see Cas being all gaga for this dude tomorrow.”

���Dude, his Dad is dead. Pretty sure his mind would be somewhere else.” Sam tells him. Watching him with those damn wide eyes that scanned him. Looking for any damn indication that there could be something wrong. “What’s up with you? Are you...wait.”

“Shut up, Sam.” Dean could read it in his brother’s face. That damn aha moment lit up his whole face.

“Are you still hung up on Cas?” Sam’s grin broke across his face and Dean stood up to walk to his front door.

“Thanks for dropping by, Sammy. Now leave!” He opened the door and motioned Sam to walk through it.

“Hell no!” Sam rested his feet on the empty chair. His arms crossing over his chest as he got comfortable. “My big brother’s high school crush just walked back into town with a ring on his finger and you want me to just - what? Ignore it? Hell no.”

“Sam.” Dean’s voice went lower as a warning but Sam didn’t budge.

“Dude, just talk to me!” Sam tells him, opening his arms up as if showing Dean that he is ready to listen. “You used to talk to me about Cas all the time! Hell, you used to talk to me about the guys and girls you’ve been with every other day!”

“That was before.” Dean slammed the door shut knowing Sam wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. He dragged his hand down his face as he walked to the couch, not hungry enough to finish eating.

“Before what?”

“Before shit got complicated.” Dean fell into the old couch and didn’t look at his brother. Instead looked down at the beer in his hand, his thumb scraping the label off with elbows on his knees as he leaned forward in his seat. “Before Lisa left me cause I wasn’t ready for a commitment. And then Benny left because I was going too fast. Shit. I haven’t been able to get a damn thing right for a while.”

“And what? You thought Cas would be the answer?”

Dean shrugged. “I don’t know. I just saw him and I felt...better. Lighter.” A smile crept on his face. “He was still wearing that ugly coat Bobby gave him a long time ago.” He chuckled before he cleared his throat. Catching himself falling again.

“You still love him?”

“Doesn’t matter. He doesn’t feel the same way.” Dean tells him, a short cold chuckle like breath escaped his mouth as he shook his head. “He doesn’t feel the same way anymore, Sammy.”

“Dean.” It was a quiet sad tone and Dean was gonna tell him to shut it but then he found out why Sam was using that tone on him. Dean was crying.

“Maybe now that Cas moved on. Maybe you can too.” Sam walked over to sit beside him on the couch. Not touching Dean but just being close enough to comfort him. “You can stop waiting for him now.”

That was it, wasn’t it? Dean has been waiting for Cas all these damn years and he didn’t even know it.

“Fuck. I’m so stupid, Sam.” Dean shook his head as he put his beer down on the floor before he covered his face in his hands. “He kissed me too.”

“He kissed you?!” Sam sounded shocked but Dean didn’t look at him.

“Yeah. He did. Told me he missed me too.” Dean hits his head in frustration. “I’m so fucking stupid!”

“You’re not, Dean!” Then Sam’s arms were around him. Pulling him into a sideways hug that Dean was going to push away from but instead he let his little brother hold him. He’ll hate himself for breaking down in front of Sam tomorrow. Right now he needed the comfort. “It’s okay. You can move on now. You know now so you can just move on. Let your heart heal.”

Heal. Yeah. Yeah, that sounds nice. He thinks to himself as he took a calming breath like Sam always tells him to do.

But if he couldn’t move on 5 years ago, when the kiss was terrible, how was he suppose to move on now? With the taste of Cas and the feel of him in his arms was still burned into his mind? Still fresh. Still new.

Craving it every second he can’t have it.

“I love him, Sammy.” Dean took a shaky breath. “I still love him.” And it’s killing me knowing he doesn’t.

-

The next morning Dean was standing outside the funeral home with Charlie fussing over his and Sam’s hair. Dean kept loosening his tie while they waited for Bobby to finish the phone call with a customer, letting them know they would be closed for a friend's funeral. Friend is really putting it nicely.

Chuck was a creepy squirrely little guy with anger issues. He was sweet sometimes - like every other psycho - but his controlling nature was always a scary sight. But he helped Bobby keep the shop and helped them pay for the funeral cost of their Mom so he was an honorary friend at least.

Why was Chuck so generous to help them? Fuck if any of them know but they weren’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. That’s for sure.

“Stop fidgeting, boy!” Bobby slapped Sam’s hand away from him loosening his tie and pulled him down to fix it again.

“Ow! Uncle Bobby, that’s too tight!”

“Stop whining. We’re already late as it is.” He said patting Sam’s shoulders when he was done. Sam made a face of distaste as he rolled his eyes. Lucky for him Bobby didn’t catch him. “Dean come here. Let me fix your damn-”

“No! No. I got it.” Dean smiled reassuringly at him as he quickly tried to fix it but he wasn’t quick enough as Bobby pulled him down to fix it again. Dean groaned as he did tighten it but it was loosened just enough so he wouldn’t struggle to breathe. “Thanks, Uncle Bobby.”

Bobby looked at all three of them with a proud grin. “Now behave yourselves. This family hates us enough.”

“What an encouraging speech.” Dean commented while Charlie grimaced at all of them.

“Just stay in the background and the sooner we can leave without causing a scene the better. Got it?” The three of them nodded half-heartedly. “Good! Let’s go. Keep close.”

They started walking behind Bobby and into the funeral home. Dean kept his eyes down not wanting to look at anyone in the surprisingly crowded place. Well, not surprising. The Novak family was huge. The family of seven was big enough but then add all the damn cousins these guys had and it was a full house. Some people were even standing outside so they could talk.

It took Dean a solid 15 minutes to even find a parking spot - he ended up parking a block away - because the small parking lot quickly filled up.

So with this crowded place, he was hoping he wouldn’t have to bump into Cas. At least not bump into him so soon but of course, he’ll be the one welcoming people in.

“Fuck.” Dean hissed under his breath as his eyes met Cas’s.

Cas stiffened at the sight of him - which always made someone feel welcomed - before he forced a smile. But Dean can still read that face like a damn open book. His jaw is clenched just enough for people not to notice the stiffness while his hands fidgeted into his suit pants pocket. Yeah, well, Dean was uncomfortable too. Cas ain’t special.

Dean’s eyes traveled down Cas’s body and - bless him father cause he wants to sin - Cas looked great in a damn black floral suit. It was well fitted. Probably tailored since that is the type of family the Novak’s were and lucky for Dean it hugged him in all the right places. Dean’s eyes drifted to down only to notice there was a hand wrapped around his lower back.

Dean’s breath caught in his throat.

“Hey, Cas.” Sam stepped in front of him first and wrapped Cas into one of his big bear hugs. “Nice seeing you again but I’m sorry for your loss.”

Cas barely had his chin on Sam’s shoulder as he patted Sam’s back awkwardly. “Thank you, Sam.” Cas pulled back to smile at him. “I hope we can catch up before I leave. I would like to hear more about your studies on witchcraft.”

“How’d you-?” Sam asked but Cas motioned at the guy standing next to him. The guy that just had his arms around Cas’s waist. As if claiming him.

“Michael told me you two talked yesterday.” And then Cas turned to look at Dean. “Mick I know you meet Sam and Bobby but this is Sam’s older brother. Dean.”

Fuck you, Cas.

“Oh, Dean! I heard a lot about you from my Cas here.” He nudged Cas, who awkwardly laughed before he held his hand out for Dean to shake. “Nice to finally meet you.”

Fuck this fucker and his dumb accent. Dean narrows his eyes at him, trying to read him. As if he would see any red flags or alarms over his head. But he looked like someone he would root for on the British Bake Off and he hated him for that.

Charlie nudged him to shake the outstretched hand but Dean wouldn’t budge. He instead shrugged at him. “Um, germs, man. But nice to meet one of Cas’s friends.”

Charlie pinched his arm at that comment while Cas rolled his eyes, his shoulders dropping with a tired sigh before he glared at Dean. Mick only laughed as he took his hand back but then he wrapped it around Cas’s waist again and Dean regretted not preoccupying that fucking hand.

“Fiance actually.” Mick grinned up at Cas who strained a smile. “Hmm, I figured Sam would have told you.”

Dean mocked a smile. “Oh, he did! Shit must have slipped my mind.”

“Dean.” Cas almost growled at him.

Dean chewed on his bottom lip for a second before swallowing hard. He turned his hard smile on Cas. “I know. Sorry.”

“Don’t worry, Cas, we’ll keep an eye on him.” Sam tells him as he starts to shove Dean ahead where Bobby already disappeared to find a chair in some sad corner probably.

“Um, sorry for your loss.” Charlie gave Cas a quick hug. “Oh, I’m Charlie by the way. New best friend but it’s nice to meet you! I mean...wished it was under better circumstances but what can you do?”

She started to nervously laugh and Sam tugged at her arm to drag her along as well.

“Bye!” Charlie waved at them awkwardly, Dean saw Cas wave back with a grin and raised an eyebrow, before she sighed. “Wow, that was awkward.”

“Oh, you think so?” Dean sarcastically says while Sam’s too big arm wraps around his shoulders, probably to hold him in place. “This place better have an open bar.”

“It’s a funeral, Dean. Not a damn party.”

“Meh.” Dean shrugged before they found Bobby in the back row sneaking a sip of a flask. “Give it here, old man!”

[heartbreakgrill]

Serious; Luke Hemmings (Pt. 1)

a/n: I cannot tell you where this came from, but it IS ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD OMG. please enjoy, there WILL be more parts probably tomorrow. (Also omg I’m dying my hair, should I post a selfie? I’ve never done a face reveal lol)

description: he came with the falling of the leaves, and left with the cold breeze of winter. maybe this time, he’d stay.

The gentle cracking of a leaf breaking under your weight snapped your eyes to the sidewalk below. Your boot-clad feet ran into another leaf, a smile pile, and a dozen subway-like cracks caused by years of distress. You looked back up, afraid to run into anybody who wasn’t walking on the opposite side of the sidewalk. Luckily, you did just in time, because you dodged a group of girls jogging at a steady pace.

Your brows drew together; They weren’t in workout clothes. You looked for fear on their faces, but they passed quickly, without a hint of what you weren’t hoping for. Your head followed them, pace slowing, as you scanned their outfits. Some of them were dressed cute, in fall outfits similar to yours, but two or three were merchandise from a band- 5 Seconds of Summer.

You stopped completely. Your feet drew you to the wall behind you, as if they knew you were going to get ran over if you didn’t move. Your mouth fell agape slightly, and your heart raced. Fingers reached for your cellphone, hesitantly opening the contacts and scrolling past ABCDEFGHIJK...

L.

A sweaty thumb hovered over the sideways call button, tongue circling dry mouth for some kind of coping mechanism. Suddenly, it was ringing, but not from your actions.

Luke Hemmings.

You quickly answered, the hand that was still in the pocket of your jean jacket curling. “Hey,” a breathless tone, a feeling of desperation.

“I’m in town. I wanna see you,” he mumbled into the line, unable to speak much louder due to who all must be around him.

It’d been a year, a year since 19 year old Luke came crashing into your world like a hurricane. The leaves had been falling then, too, harsh winds whipping through until a calm autumn Sunday recruited your attention, the eye of the hurricane. It was a one night stand, fleeting kisses and dodging eyes when a phone number was hastily left on your bedside table.

You’d called. He’d answered. And after a month of relentless calls and texts, the winter winds took his blazing blue eyes and washed them out with read receipts and unopened Snapchats.

Of course you’d fallen for him so quickly. You were vulnerable, empty at that point in your life. Now, you were more stable, but you couldn’t resist seeing him.

You needed him, craved, as if some Pavlovian affect took hold as soon as the temperature dropped below 40 and midterms wheeled themselves into your schedule. It was Thanksgiving break, now, two weeks off from stressful deadlines, so you had time.

And, God, you were so willing to give it all to him.

“How long are you in town?” You muttered back, afraid someone on the other side would hear you.

“Week and a half. Five shows, 7 days off. Free today.”

Your eyes flickered between the people passing you, the crosswalk ten steps ahead. “I have plans for lunch, with a friend, but come over at 4. K?”

“Okay. See you soon.”

You hung up, taking control of the situation in the slightest. You wanted to grip onto the wall, your body flailing through space in his head and your own heart. There was no gripping the sand between your fingertips.

You went ahead to lunch, fingers tapping relentlessly on the tabletop, your inner thigh when you noticed Sheila glaring at the rhythm. Eventually, after you’d gulped through two ice waters and a sand which, she cleared her throat. You looked up from the floor, suddenly realizing how dry you’d been the last forty minutes.

She spoke, “okay, what is up with you?”

You and Sheila had been roommates last year, still were this year, too. Only, she was leaving today to visit family for the holiday. She’d been out running errands for before she left, and wanted to see you before she wouldn’t for half a month.

Your mouth was dry already, but you swallowed again to try to salivate it. Provide clarity to your words. You shrugged, knowing how embarrassing this would be, “Luke’s back.”

Sheilas eyebrows rose high, her arms crossing over her chest. She leaned back in her chair, tongue clicking in bashful anger. “Oh, really? For what? To apologize?”

You dryly chortled, though you didn’t smile. “No. He has some shows to do. I completely forgot. I haven’t even seen him post on Instagram in forever.”

“Y/N,” Sheila reached across the table and tightly gripped your wrist. She loosened the hold when you met her eyes. “You’re going to get hurt again.”

“I know,” you shrugged. “I just can’t say no, ya know? It sounds stupid, but maybe this will provide me closure. Or maybe this time he’ll stay.”

“You know he won’t.”

Her words didn’t hit you that hard: She was right.

The last time he’d been around, he was still with Arzaylea. You were a getaway for him, his escape from the flashing lights, the public state of his relationship with her, and the screaming fans. You promised him to never, ever tell anyone about the incident. the public would hate him, his fans would be angry, and he’d lose listeners.

“I don’t.”You denied her, though it was true, in the edge of an argument.

Sheila opened her mouth to speak, and you could tell by the breath she took, that she was going to reprimand you. You suddenly reached to the ground, hand snapping from her fingers, and tugged your back over your shoulder.

“I gotta go. He’s coming over in two hours. See you when you get back.”

Sheila sat in stunned silence, eyes barely following you as you bounced out the door. Your glare stared hard at the concrete beneath your feet, more and more leaves crunching below.

Soon to be an analogy to your heart.

-

You showered when you got home, brushed your teeth, washed your skin with glittering lotions and rose-scented body washes. He didn’t deserve all of this, no, but the way he’d make you feel for the next few days did. You should just move on, but your mind had been on him for the last year, and, yes, you would make sure this would be closure.

Or a new beginning.

A knock on the apartment door came firm and sharp at exactly 4:01. You were sitting on the edge of your couch, ignoring the text messages from Sheila, and the group chat with your other friends. Your knee was bouncing and you hoped to God he wouldn’t smell your anxious sweat.

You wiped your brow before standing and moving in shaky legs to the door. You shut an eye, peering through the peephole. There he stood, in all his rockstar glory, a leather jacket and black skinny jeans holding clenched fists, pouty pink lips framing the frantic look on his blue eyes. God, had they always been that pretty?

You opened the door wide, allowing him to move in beside you. You shut it, turning to face him.

And it all came back naturally.

Luke reached out to your waist, pulling you flush against him in a warm hug. You held his neck between your arms, fingers tucking themselves into his curls, which were much longer now.

“How are you?” His accent had faded much more, but it was still there to haunt the goosebumps on your skin.

You tugged away, fingers splaying across his leather jacket. “Okay. Uh, nervous,” you shared a laugh before he moved his hand to cup your cheek.

Your eyes melded into his own, his blue pupils flushed wide open with intoxicated lust. “Don’t be. Just me.”

You pressed your lips to his own, feeling the same balloon pop in your chest. And, some time later, you were flush against the bed, Luke’s body collapsed on top of yours. Your heaving chest puffed up with each deep breath to meet his own before he rolled over beside you.

You squeezed your eyes shut, opening them as he moved his arms around you. You turned to face him, eyelashes now fluttering against his chest.

“You’re so beautiful,” he smiled softly at you.

“Your hairs gotten longer,” you replied. You reached up and curled the strands around your pointer finger.

“Yeah, decided to grow it out after I broke up with...” he trailed off, “well, you know her.”

This was the first you were hearing of the breakup. Your eyes lit up, but you surpressed your grin. “Oh. I didn’t know.”

Luke shrugged, “S’okay, though. I’ve been better without her. Hell, even Petunia is happier. I got my own place in LA, living with Ash and Cal now.”

“How are they?” You asked him, letting your head falling into the cavity between his breasts.

He drew across your skin, “Good. Yeah, Ash has a girl. Kay, is her name. Cal’s still single, but he’s good. Michael’s still with Crystal. They’re living together now.”

You hummed. “And you?

His eyes met yours and he smiled sadly. “Still getting over it. But, I think this could help...”

He kissed you again. You held on, unwilling to let go until his phone started to ring. He answered it, other arm still holding you close to him.

“Yeah, I’ll be there in an hour.”

Your bottom lip poured, moving with Luke was he sat up. He stood and began to put on his boxers, but left the rest of himself naked. You admired his chest, more defined now that he was somewhat taller and healthier.

Maybe you didn’t regret being the other girl if she had really taken that big of a toll on him...

Luke hung up the phone with a goodbye and sat on the edge of the bed. You wrapped your arms around him from behind. Your lips grazed the skin beneath his ear and his head fall back against your shoulder.

“Everything okay?” You kissed.

He nodded, “Gotta get back for some celebration shit.”

You sighed as he turned to face you. He hugged you better, forehead pressing against yours. “Hey, pretty girl, I’m not going anywhere for another hour.”

“Another week, right?” You smiled. His head rocked forward. “Good.”

“We talked about me some, let’s hear about you.”

Luke got more comfortable after handing you his T-shirt. He leaned up against the headboard, allowing you to lay your head in his lap. His hand fell in your hair, the other splayed across your stomach.

Your fingers played with his. “Not much has changed, Lu. I’m better, I feel better. But it’s still just college, work, internships here and there. Can’t wait to graduate and just travel.”

“You look better,” the hand in your hair traced your jawline. “You look healthier and happier. I could see it in your walk.”

“I got a therapist,” you giggled.

He applauded you jokingly before his hands found their spot again. “I’m proud of you. I remember you telling me how nervous you were for that. But look at you now. Beautiful as always, but happy with yourself. That makes you the most beautiful.”

Your cheeks flushed and you looked away. “Yeah, well, thanks.”

“Where do you think you’ll go first?” He continued to inquire.

You shrugged, “I wanna go to France. Or LA.”

An awkward beat passed. Would he think you were asking to come visit? Was he going to pull away then, did he still wants no strings attached?

You cleared your throat and Luke’s tongue clicked in response. “LA’s beautiful. Not as good as home, though.”

Was that an invitation?

“Australia?” He hummed at the question. “Id like to go. See an ostrich or a kangaroo.”

He laughed, “Out of everything there is to see.”

“What do you want me to say? ‘Oh, gosh, I can’t wait to go to Australia and meet Liz Hemmings! She is the real star here.’”

You laughed loudly at the joke and Luke joined you until silence took over again. You felt him shrug. “I think she’d like you.”

“Who?” Your brows furrowed.

He traced them, feeling down to around your chin and brushing the hair away from your neck. “Mum. She’d like you. You’re kind, bubbly. Like her.”

You blushed again. “I’d like to meet her.”

“I...” Luke trailed and never picked up from it.

It was nearly 9 pm now, and your eyes were beginning to fall close. You hadn’t realized how stuck on a schedule you were from college until your body relaxed completely into Luke’s lap. Your hand held tightly to his, though, fingers threaded with them.

He glanced at the clock on your bedside table, methodically rubbing circles into your hairline. His lips puckered and he leaned to place a firm kiss onto your cheek, nose, forehead.

He gently set you onto the bed, pulling the sheets out you. He tugged in the muscle tank top he’d work under his shirt, his leather jacket, jeans, and boots before tucking away his phone. He would bear the cold for you to sleep in his shirt.

Luke kissed your forehead again, causing you to stir. You groggily opened your eyes, meeting the electric blue right above you.

“Gotta go, pretty girl. I’ll see you tomorrow? Maybe you could come to a show,” Luke squeezed your wrist.

You pursed your lips and he pressed a kiss to them. “Okay. see you.”

He was gone with the click of the lock in the door and you rolled over, wide awake.

TAG LIST: @mantlereid , @boxofteenageideas @dinosaursandsocks , @ashhdaniellee95 @stephaniemelville-blog @zhangyixingxing1 @verlaneswiftie13

[oliverstarked]

where I belong

[PG-13, 3.4k words]

"Buck's not sure of the exact moment that he knew Eddie was it for him, but it’s been that way for so long now it’s become a part of who he is. He used to be good at pretending his feelings didn’t exist, but he’s so tired these days."

A little bit of introspection, a lot of idiots in love.

[read on ao3]

The ocean is so beautiful at dawn. 

Under the soft pink-orange sky the water looks bruise-purple, whitecaps leaving foamy trails on the sand. The sun is only just peeking over the horizon, edging towards another gorgeous LA day. But before that begins, before the hustle and bustle and wailing sirens, Buck sits on the beach on the cold sand and feels caught in a moment so peaceful, so nice, just the squalling of gulls and the gentle crash of the waves for company. 

He pushes stale air out of his lungs and breathes the fresh in deeply. The chill feels good, raises goosebumps on his skin and reminds him that he’s alive. A reminder he’s needed a lot lately. He’s been struggling, even though his leg has healed, even though the tsunami is months behind him, even though his relationship with his 118 family is better than ever and he has no reason to be struggling. Nightmares come and go, cold sweats, little niggling thoughts that burrow their way into his brain throughout the day. 

He tries not to talk about it. There are so many people who have it worse than him and he doesn’t want to become some kind of social… leech around his friends, constantly draining them of energy by going on about his issues. You’re exhausting , Eddie said to him once. Buck knows it’s true, knows he takes inches and runs them into miles. His heart may be in the right place, sure, but he doesn’t know when to shut up, when to slow down. If there’s one thing his lawsuit mistake has taught him, it’s that his actions, his selfishness, has consequences on those around him. 

So what if he has bad dreams occasionally? He’s not a kid, he can look after himself. It’s more important right now that he’s there for his friends: asking Bobby how Michael’s doing, bridging the relationship between Chim and his brother, being there for Maddie always, listening to Hen talk about how Nia is settling in, being whatever Eddie needs to stop him doing stupid things again. It doesn’t leave a lot of room for his own problems.

It doesn’t matter. That’s just what Buck does for the people he loves.

The warmth of the sun creeps onto his face as it rises higher, prickling his skin. Buck squints into it, seeing nothing but gold, then sighs and gets to his feet. He brushes sand off the seat of his pants before slowly turning and making his way back up the beach. 

At least he gets to go to work. 

   Eddie’s getting changed when Buck walks into the locker room, and Buck manfully pretends he can’t see the miles of bare skin on display. Hen is sitting on the bench, laughing at something Eddie must have said, and it’s easy to grin at the two of them and say, “Well, good morning.”

“Hey,” Eddie smiles, shrugging into a t-shirt, thank god. 

“Buck, I have to show you this.” Hen holds her phone out, a video paused on the screen. Buck takes it, taps play. It’s Nia, holding onto Denny’s hands and bouncing up and down in time with her blonde curls, screeching in delight as a catchy pop song plays in the background. 

“That’s pretty damn cute,” Buck says. “When do I get to meet this li’l nugget?”

“Soon,” Hen tells him, slipping her phone back into her pocket. “It’s a lot for her, the social worker says we need to introduce new things and people gradually.”

Eddie, tucking his overshirt into his belt now, says, “Well, whenever you guys need a babysitter, hit us up. Chris and Denny can play and Buck and I will dote on that gorgeous girl.”

Hen snorts, looking between them. “Should you be volunteering Buck for that?”

Honestly, it didn’t even occur to Buck that he wouldn’t be there. The automatic assumption on Eddie’s part too makes him feel warmer than he did five minutes ago. 

“Hey, you know I’m down,” Buck beams, “you just name the day.”

Hen squeezes his arm as she heads towards the door. “Thanks boys, we will definitely take you up on that.”

When she’s gone, Buck finally moves towards his own locker to start getting changed. Eddie is still there, tapping away on his phone. Buck wonders if he’s texting Ana . If they’ve even reached the ‘exchanging numbers’ phase yet. 

“Hey, man, you wanna grab pizza tomorrow night? You, me, Chris and Mario Kart at my place?”

“Sure,” Eddie agrees, hardly glancing up, definitely distracted. “But, uh, Chris won’t be there, he’s got that overnight field trip at the observatory tomorrow.” 

Damn, Buck should have remembered that. Christopher had been chattering excitedly about it for a couple weeks now. Eddie had mentioned it several times too, although decidedly less excitedly and more in worried-dad-mode. 

“Oh yeah, that’s right. Well, in that case you definitely gotta come over. We can drink beer and watch a movie that doesn’t involve some kind of talking animal.”

“Sounds good.”

He’s still typing. What is he doing, writing a goddamn article? Who could he possibly have that much to say to? 

Buck takes a breath, remembers he’s not being a selfish asshole anymore and gets changed quietly. Ana sounds like a nice person, she’d probably be good for Eddie. Buck’s feelings, his stupid feelings that he’s shoved so far down they make him feel a bit queasy more often than not, shouldn’t even factor into it.

“Are you okay?”

Buck startles at Eddie’s question. He’s not on his phone anymore, but looking straight at Buck, a little crease in between his eyebrows.

“Fine… why'd you ask?”

“You look tired.”

“Yeah. I, uh, got up early to go for a run on the beach. Anyway, not even eyebags could ruin this handsome face so you shut your mouth,” Buck blusters with an exaggerated wink and a bit of swagger as he closes his locker. 

It works, and Eddie rolls his eyes. “So glad that your ego remains unaffected.”

They argue playfully back and forth as they head up to the kitchen together and by the time they sit down to plates of Bobby’s French toast, Buck has all but forgotten his weird start to the day. 

Luckily, work keeps them busy. Any downtime they get is spent either stuffing their faces with food, showering the grime and sweat away, or trying to catch a few minutes of sleep. The entire twenty-four hours passes without major incident, unless you count Chimney tripping on a firehose and falling ass over teakettle on the freshly-waxed station floor. They’re still laughing about it as they get changed to go home the following morning, exhaustion making it hard to stop.

By the time he gets back to his apartment and collapses into bed, Buck’s tired enough that falling asleep is the easiest thing in the world.

 He wakes late in the afternoon, hot and sweaty from the sunlight pouring in through the windows. He showers, eats a sandwich, and texts Eddie to ask what time he’s coming over. 

Some sort of clarity must have crept in while Buck slept, because his head feels a little clearer. Still, he wonders what it means that a clear head feels like some kind of miracle these days. He thinks it means that he might need to talk to Frank again.

Buck grabs his phone and fiddles around on it until he pulls up his contacts. Frank’s name is sitting there right underneath Eddie’s. Before he can think about it too much, he calls and makes an appointment for his next day off. Part of him feels that old anxiety come back, worries that he’s slipping backwards instead of moving forwards, but another part of him is ultimately relieved. He doesn’t have to worry about burdening Frank, it’s his job to listen. He’s not allowed to be exhausted by Buck and his issues. 

By the time Eddie arrives not long after seven, Buck has cleaned his entire apartment, gone grocery shopping to get that beer that Eddie likes, and watched a Nat Geo documentary on bears. It’s been easy, simple, and he’s feeling okay. 

Eddie lets himself in with a smile and a tupperware container, and even though they only parted ways that morning, it’s still good to see him. “Hey, sorry I’m late, Ana called just as I was leaving.”

And just like that, Buck’s stomach sours. 

“She called you?”

“Yeah, I asked her to update me on Chris. She said he’s good, that they’ve just eaten dinner and he’s with his friends.” Eddie pauses, makes a face. “Guess that means I should stop worrying, right?”

“So you guys just talked about Christopher?” Buck asks because he’s an idiot who likes to torture himself. 

Eddie frowns, putting the tupperware on the kitchen counter. “Yeah. What else would we talk about? I emailed the school his overnight care plan this morning and she just wanted to reassure me. Anyway, Abuela made you tamales, shall I put them in the refrigerator or d’you wanna have them with the pizza?”

Buck still doubts that any other parents are getting personal calls from their kid’s teacher, but it makes him feel better knowing that Eddie’s only thought is the well-being of his son. 

Maybe this whole Ana thing is something he should talk to Frank about, too. 

“I’m going back to therapy,” Buck blurts, his brain to mouth filter nonexistent. “I have nightmares. I stopped talking about it because I thought I was being selfish but it’s fucking me up so. Yeah. I’m going back to therapy.”

Eddie’s eyebrows hit his hairline. Buck silently begs him not to make a big deal out of it, and is relieved when all Eddie says is, “Good. Thank you for telling me. The tamales?”

A mildly hysterical laugh bursts out of Buck. He comes forward and wraps his arms around Eddie, so fucking relieved that after everything, he still gets to have this. 

Eddie goes with the moment gracefully, pats him on the back a few times, and when Buck pulls away, Eddie leaves a hand on his shoulder and says, “I’m here for you. I know I haven’t always been great at that before, but I am. You don’t have to do this by yourself unless you want to.”

And Buck knows it’s true, can tell by the fierce determination in Eddie’s eyes, and thinks that maybe this means he’s not so exhausting to deal with after all. That maybe Eddie was exhausted with himself just a little, too. 

“We’re good, Eddie,” Buck says honestly. “I’m gonna call the pizza place, you take those tamales and the beer over to the couch.”

 They’re one and a half movies, two pizzas and half a dozen tamales in when Buck opens his mouth and “So are you and Ana dating?” comes out of it. 

Eddie chokes a little on his beer. “No? I don’t really know.”

It’s not quite the answer Buck was hoping for. “How can you not know, man?”

Shifting uncomfortably, Eddie leans back on the couch until he’s looking up at the ceiling, like he can’t meet Buck’s eye. “She’s nice, and pretty, and good with Chris. I dunno, Buck. It feels like it could go somewhere?”

Buck swallows hard. He knew it. He should definitely have waited to have this conversation until after he’s seen Frank though, because he has no goddamn clue how he’s supposed to be the supportive best friend when every fiber of his being is burning with jealousy. He’s not sure of the exact moment that he knew Eddie was it for him, but it’s been that way for so long now it’s become a part of who he is. He used to be good at pretending his feelings didn’t exist, but he’s so tired these days.

But what he has with Eddie and Christopher right now is the best thing going on in his life — he’s not going to risk losing that. 

“I wouldn’t even know how to ask her out,” Eddie continues, laughing a little at himself. “Out of practice would definitely be an understatement, I have no clue what I’m doing.”

Buck mirrors Eddie’s position, staring up at the beams under the loft. “I think you just say ‘would you like to go out with me’, Eddie. It’s not that hard.”

“Easy for you to say,” Eddie snorts. “I bet no girl has ever turned you down.”

“Ha, you should speak to Joe Levinson from high school,” Buck tells him. God, he thought Joe was so cute. He never told anyone, especially not his parents, and Maddie was off at college, but he used to trail around after Joe like a lovesick puppy. “We’re talking the crush of all teenage crushes here, man. I was so gone on Joe and it was senior year and then prom was coming up, and I—”

“Oh no,” Eddie laughs, “you got turned down?”

“I got humiliated,” Buck grins. “I thought I’d go classic, y’know? A love note in the locker, little hearts doodled on it and ‘I really like you, will you be my prom date?’ written in glitter gel pen. Imagine my surprise when the next morning my note is not just in Joe’s locker, but on the front of every single locker, in the halls, the cafeteria, even the damn teacher’s lounge. He made sure the last few weeks of high school were not good ones.”

“Wait…” Eddie tips his head sideways, confusion written on his face. “Joe was a boy?”

Shit. Buck isn’t ashamed of being bisexual at all, but it occurs to him now that he hasn’t actually told anybody besides his sister. “Uh… yeah?” 

“Did you just come out to me?”

Buck shrugs. “I kinda forgot you didn’t know?”

Their faces are pretty close at this angle, their heads cushioned by the back of the couch. Eddie doesn’t look hostile or disgusted though. He looks thoughtful. 

“That was really brave,” he eventually says, quieter than before. “I can’t even imagine asking a boy out in high school.”

There’s something in the way he says it that gives Buck pause. “Did you want to?” he asks carefully.

“It wasn’t an option.” Eddie doesn’t sound sad, just matter-of-fact. “Besides, I met Shannon in college. And I really loved her, Buck. There were… occasions, while I was in the army, but I never acted on it. I’d made vows, they meant something to me.”

Buck can’t look away from Eddie’s face, pulled in by the wide-eyed openness and the thought that he didn’t know this about Eddie — that they didn’t know this about each other. 

“And now?” he asks, not sure why he’s whispering.

“Now I don’t know,” Eddie says honestly. He licks his lips. Buck couldn’t tell you which of them moved first but all of a sudden their lips are touching, pressing. It’s dry, a little chaste, but most definitely a kiss. Buck shifts, brings his hand up towards Eddie’s face, and barely touches his jaw before Eddie is springing backwards, shock written all over him. 

“Buck, I’m sorry—”

“No, dude, that was all me, I was totally over the line.”

“We just got — caught up in the moment,” Eddie says, and Buck’s not sure which of them he’s trying to convince. 

“Yeah, all that talk about dating and my tragic high school trauma. Woulda been weird if you hadn’t wanted to kiss me,” he smirks, aiming for cool and cocky and probably missing by several miles. 

Eddie lets out a bark of laughter that’s more panic than amusement. They’re quiet for a minute. Eddie’s knee is still pressed against Buck’s, warm and solid. Buck doesn’t know what’s happening here but he knows he really liked kissing Eddie, can still feel his lips tingling. He knows he’s not going to lose Eddie over this though, can’t lose him. He’ll do whatever it takes for that not to happen.

“It was a moment,” Buck concludes, for both their sake. “Moment’s over.”

Eddie’s throat visibly bobs when he swallows. “Right. Y’know, I should probably take off. Before—”

He cuts himself off. The tips of his ears go bright red. It takes every ounce of willpower Buck has not to ask him ‘before what?’

He follows Eddie across the apartment to the door, but he really doesn’t want this to be weird when they get to the station in the morning. He lays his hand on Eddie’s forearm and asks, “We’re okay, aren’t we, Eddie?”

To his relief, Eddie smiles and it seems real. “Of course, Buck. Nothing’s changed. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

As he lets himself out, the door closing softly behind him, Buck can’t help thinking what a bad liar Eddie is. Of course something has changed. Everything has changed. That kiss will hang over them for the rest of their days as partners — as friends. You don’t just ‘accidentally’ kiss your best friend and then act like it didn’t happen. 

Buck wanders into the kitchen, fists his hand in his hair, scrapes them over his face, repeatedly bangs his forehead into the cupboard door. Stupid stupid stupid . 

Restless, he clears away pizza boxes. Drops empty beer bottles into the recycling. Seals the lid on the tupperware and puts the remaining tamales in the refrigerator. Shuts off the TV — how didn’t he notice the movie was still playing? 

He’s wiping down the kitchen counters when there’s a knock on the door. 

Eddie’s standing there on the other side, looking just as wide-eyed as he was when he left. 

“Hey,” Buck says uncertainly, ignoring the swoop in his stomach. “You forget something?”

“Yes,” Eddie says and he takes a step forward, holds Buck’s face in his hands, and crashes their mouths together. 

This kiss is nothing like their last. 

Eddie is demanding, relentless, tongue tracing the seam of Buck’s lips straight away until Buck opens up for him and everything gets hotter and wetter and so much more amazing. His own hands, which had been floundering in surprise, land on Eddie’s waist and Buck walks him backwards until his back hits the open door and closes it with a bang. He leans into Eddie with all his weight, pushes him against the wood, shoves their hips together and groans the filthiest sound he’s ever made into Eddie’s mouth.

It’s incredible, feels absolutely perfect. Buck moves his hands, slips them under the soft fabric of Eddie’s shirt, finding warm skin and hard muscles and a stomach that trembles when his thumb flicks over a nipple. 

With a gasp, Eddie pulls back and smacks his head against the door. Buck removes a hand and places it gently behind Eddie’s head to cushion it, kissing a lush apology to his lips. 

“You feel so good,” Eddie mumbles. “Buck.”

Buck kisses down Eddie’s neck, their stubble rasping, his lips fluttering over Eddie’s thundering pulse. He shoves their hips together some more — once, twice, and again because he can’t stop — and he can feel Eddie’s dick through their jeans and he’s so turned on he can hardly breathe. 

“We should talk,” he says to Eddie, breathlessly, “but first we should fuck.”

“Best idea you’ve ever had, Buckley.”

A grin spreads across Eddie’s face and Buck copies it, kissing him again because he just can’t help it and grabbing his hand, dragging him away from the door and up the steps to the loft.

Two orgasms, one set of clean sheets and one shower later, Buck feels brave enough to say, “I want this every day forever.”

Eddie’s nearly asleep, head right next to Buck’s on the pillow, one arm slung across Buck’s stomach. He cracks open an eye and presses a tiny kiss to the corner of Buck’s mouth. 

“Guess we’re on the same page then.”

“I don’t want you to date Ana.”

The other eye pops open, trademark Eddie Diaz exasperation all over his face. “Buck.”

“Just checking!” Buck laughs, drawing patterns on Eddie’s arm. “Y’know, I’m still gonna need therapy.”

“I’d be worried if you didn’t. Unless sex really is a magic cure.”

Buck tries to smile but instead finds himself softly saying, “I might have a nightmare.”

Eddie kisses him again, for longer this time, then shifts closer and nuzzles his nose into Buck’s temple, his hair. “I’m not going anywhere. Go to sleep, Buck.”

They settle in, warm under the blankets, and Buck closes his eyes, falling asleep quick and easy, between one breath and the next. 

[dobrikswriting]

Timing || D.D. Imagine

Request: Can I do a David request? She’s a big movie star and they dated for a while but broke up and they’re were like best friends, and maybe after the break up she has to bring another celebrity to the premiere of a movie for PR and she tries to tell him but he won’t listen and maybe they kiss at the end idk what from there. Angst- Fluff maybe? Just angst ? Idk! (Love your writing btw)

Thank you so much! Hope you like it!

"I just don't think it's a good idea." I said running a hand through my hair.

"Why it makes sense and it's good PR for the movie, it's happening." My publicist, Danielle, basically commanded.

"Okay master." I scoffed and hung up the phone. I laid down on the hotel bed and closed my eyes. I really didn't want to go to the premier anyways, let alone be forced to go with Tom. Don't get me wrong Tom Holland was a very nice man and I guess I was lucky to have to spend a night with him, but I was just dreading this night in general. Movie premieres used to be so fun. I could get all dressed up and take pictures and have a great night, but the only reason the night was even half way decent is because I used to have David by my side. He made the whole night better. We had been broken up for a couple months, our schedules just didn't work for each other he was always busy shooting and I was always traveling for movies, we just didn't have time for each other. I sighed and picked my phone up to call David, if I was going to be seen with someone else i felt like I wanted it clear to him that it was just for publicity.

I heard the phone ringing and then the beginning to his voicemail. I hung up and quickly sent him a text to call me when he could. I heard a knock on my door and went to answer it, I was relived to see my best friend turned assistant on the other side.

"Hey Ang," I said and gave her a quick hug. "Did Danielle talk to you?" I asked wondering if she knew the plans for tomorrow night.

"Yeah she just called so I came to check and see where you mind is at." She replied stepping into the hotel room and sitting down on the bed.

"I don't know. It's it weird that I'm sad to be seen with someone else? Is it crazy I just want it to be David by my side?" I asked laying down next to her.

"No, its not crazy. You and David were such a big part of each others lives it's normal to miss him. But don't let that ruin the fact that you are still going to have an amazing night." She said turning to look at me.

"I just wish we had ended on bad terms." I said laughing a little because it sounded ridiculous. "It would just be easier to move on if I didn't still love him, and want him so fucking bad." I said, my voice cracking saying it out loud. "I know that we both agreed this is what was best but there is a part of me that is scared if he sees that I'm out with some else that I moved on and then next thing you know he's actually moved on. I know we didn't work out right now but I just can't help but hope some how we find a way." I added.

"That's understandable, but it's also selfish. I love you with all my heart but you and David not working out might be a sign that you needed to let him go so something better could happen for you and for him. If you guys find a way to make it work that is awesome but don't let it consume you. Don't let that thought of what maybe could, but probably not, happen ruin something that could make you really happy. Not saying that that's Tom, but just let you mind be open okay." She said putting an arm around me to comfort me.

"I wish it was as easy as that." I said.

"I know it's hard, but come on lets go, we have a rehearsal dressing so don't be sad lets go make you look like a hot ass bitch and then you can take a picture and post it for all the eligible bachelors in your life." She joked. I jokingly rolled my eyes and followed her out the door.

-

Time had gone by so fast I didn't realize how late it was until I walked outside and saw it was dark. We had just finished practicing what my hair and makeup would look like for tomorrow, I looked pretty amazing if I do say so myself. I needed some fresh air so I went on a walk outside the hotel until I found a bench along the side walk and I decided to sit and just relax for a second. It was short lived when I started to feel my phone vibrate in my hands. I looked down to see David's name on the screen, I tried to ignore the butterflies in my stomach, I had missed him so much I was excited to talk to him. I answered his face time and waiting for the screen to show him.

"Hey! Wow y/n you look good! Have a hot date tonight?" He joked. I felt a blush come up, it was a very simple compliment so I don't know what it made me so giddy. Maybe it had something to do with how good he looked with his messy brown hair, and his glasses on.

"Thank you, we were just practicing some possible looks for tomorrow night, you think this is a winner?" I asked doing some model faces.

"I think you'll look amazing no matter what." He softly replied back. I smiled at him.

"Well I just wanted to talk to you about something, today Danielle told me that tomorrow, instead of my going alone they want me to go with Tom and I ju-" I started but was quickly cut off.

"Y/n that's cool! I've heard he's a super fun guy you'll have a really good night! I gotta go but good luck. You look really good." He said quickly and then the call ended.

My heart sank a little bit, I don't know what I expected but I was sad that I didn't get to talk to him longer. I missed him so much it hurt. I put my phone down in my bag and just sat on the bench for a little longer. I thought about what Angela said about not wasting my time being sad and letting that ruin something that could make me happy and I made a goal for myself to not let me ruin tomorrow night with sad thoughts. I got up and went back to my room. I got in the shower to wash off all the make up. After I was all clean I got in bed and opened up youtube to watch a couple videos until I felt more tired, of course the first suggestion that popped up was David's new video. I felt my heart get tight as I looked at the thumbnail of him and Madison Beer alone in his Tesla together. It was nothing to get hurt over so I don’t know why I felt like my world was shattering. Maybe that's why he didn't really care about who I was with. He had already moved on. I had spent all day being sad about it and here he was doing it with no problem. I put my phone on the night stand and just laid in bed thinking about everything. From my life with David and everything it could of been to my life now, and I how I was going to turn it into something that made me happy, I loved acting, and at first moving around for movies was so exciting, but now it was just exhausting and putting a strain on my life that I didn't want anymore. I quickly sent my manager a text to look into some tv show gigs, so I for at least a while I could stay in one place for once.

-

Premier day always seemed to go in fast forward. I was always being whisked around for someone to work on my tan, someone else doing hair, someone else doing make up, getting dressed and then for someone else to practice what to say and how to say it so that magazines couldn't take anything out of context.

I hadn't even had much time to think about anything when I heard a knock on the dressing room door. "Come in." I shouted at who ever was on the other side.

"Hello." I heard a voice say as the door opened. I smiled brightly as I saw Tom's face appear from behind the door. "Oh my gosh you look amazing." He said coming to greet me with a kiss on the cheek. We had grown pretty close since filming the movie together. "So how do you feel about tonight?" He asked, he was there through my break up with David, he knew how hard it had been on me.

"Good you know we are going to have an amazing night." I replied back smiling at him.

"That's my girl! We'll the limo is waiting, you ready to face the cameras?" He asked holding his hand out. I nodded and grabbed it, walking with him out to the limo, where there was luckily champagne, I happily grabbed it and popped it open, taking a drink without a glass.

"Oh so we're about to have a real fun night." Tom added laughing, I laughed with him and passed him the bottle. We had a only about a ten minute ride to the venue but we put quite a dent in the bottle. I giggled as the limo came to a stop and a figure open our door. We got out and I took a deep breath as Tom got slid his hand in mine. I looked down at our interlocked fingers and back up at him. He squeezed my hand and gave me a knowing smile. We turned to the swarm of fans and cameras as we started to walk into the where the red carpet was. We posed for some pictures before we got to our first interview.

"Y/N can I just say you look breath taking." The interviewer stated right away.

"Thank you thank you, a big shout out to my team that makes this all happen." I said back.

"Tom how does it feel to have such a beautiful date tonight?" They asked moving the mic to him.

"You know I feel very lucky and out of place next to her, she deserves her own red carpet she's amazing." He said laughing.

"Now y/n we were so sad to hear about you and David splitting but this looks like a good couple right here, will we be seeing more of you two in the future." She said looking at me.

I paused for a second not sure what to say back. "You know we are super good friends and I am so lucky to have Tom and all my other friends in my life. I am so happy and ready for the future but for right now that future is just focused on me and no one else."

The interviewer nodded and then went into questions about the movie and our other co-stars. The rest of the night went pretty much the same, I dodged questions about David and for the most part it went really well. It was hard to have a great night when every five minutes someone was asking about David, but Tom made it very fun and as much as possible tired to save me from being asked questions I didn’t want to answer.

After the premier everyone was going to the after party, I was joining but I wanted to change into something more comfortable first so I went back to my hotel. I walked into the lobby and stopped in my tracks as I looked at the seating area and saw that familiar mop of brown hair. David locked eyes with me and instantly stood up and walked over to me.

"Hey, can we talk?" He asked as he got closer. I nodded not able to get any words out, I hadn't seen David in person since we decided to break up and he looked as amazing as ever. We walked in silence back to my room, He sat on the couch and I sat on the bed. No one said anything at first, then David spoke up.

"You look amazing. Did you have fun tonight?" He asked looking at his hands.

"About as much fun as I could have when everyone wants to talk about you all night." I replied. He looked up and me and I could see they were red, almost like he had been crying.

"Why are you here?" I finally asked.

David opened and closed him mouth a couple of time, searching for how he wanted to respond. "I didn't know how to respond when you told me you had a date to this thing tonight." He said looking down again. "Y/N I know we made this decision together but I just wasn't prepared to see you with someone else." He added. "I mean I guess it's bound to happen I mean you are amazing and beautiful. And any one would be lucky to have you."

"It wasn't a real date David, but even if it was, I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be with someone if that's what I want. You can't go posting videos of you and other girls and then still expect me to just sit around and wait for you to want me again." I said, finally releasing the hurt I had been holding inside.

"You obviously didn't watch the video, but anyw-" David started and I cut him off.

"Why? What does that mean?" I asked curious.

"We were giving each other shit, I told her I would never like her back and she joked about how I would never be over you." He said looking back up at me. "And you're right you do deserve that. I just.... I don't want that to be with someone else." He said standing up and walking over to me. "I want to be the one that makes you happy and I know we said ending it was better for both of us but I don't think so. I have been so miserable without you, I would much rather be together and have to work around our schedules than not be with you at all. I miss you." He said, he was standing right in front of me, so close that all I wanted to do was jump into his arms.

"I miss you too David, but do you remember how hard it was before? We ended it for a reason." I replied back, he heart broke as I saw his face fall. "I want to be with you too but what is going to be different?" I asked

"Everything. I'll come with you to set more and travel with you I'll do whatever it takes to make this work I am so sick of not being with you." David replied.

"Last night I asked my manager to try to find me some TV shows I could audition for." I said off topic. "Today he emailed me about a couple shows looking for new characters, almost all them film in LA." I said looking up at David.

"Okay, but do you think that's going to make you happy? You love doing movies and seeing the world." David said looking at down at me, making sure I was making this decision for me not for our relationship.

"I love acting, and I love you and this is a way I can have both. I can still see the world but now it'll just be on vacations with my boyfriend." I said. The biggest smile swept across David's face as he basically leaped on me pushing both of us forward on the bed, his lips met mine and instantly the past few months of pain washed away and everything felt like it would be okay again.

[mickmarstookmyheart]

Long time no see

Mick Mars X Reader

Summary: You are working at the famous Whisky a Go Go as a bartender. A new band called Mötley Crüe has full shows every night and whenever you see the lead guitarist you can't get out of your head since he seems pretty familiar you just don't know from where.

When you woke up in the afternoon you thought it will be a usual day. You took on your working top, jeans and boots and headed to the bus station. On the bus you were listening to music and were looking out of the window watching all the people going home from work. Your daily routine was quite different cause you worked in a night club. Not that you didn't like it there. Music all night, every night.

You stopped at the entrance of the place and looked up to see which band will perform tonight. Mötley Crüe. Again? Well they play pretty well it's not about that. During every concert you couldn't concentrate on the work, but on the members. That guitarist dude, Mars or whatever he calls himself looked so familiar but you didn't know from where.

A massive amount of rockers flooded through the entrance when the gates were opened. They immediately attacked the bar and was in long queues waiting for you.

"Hey, Jon! You can go and have your break if you want. The concert can start at any moment now, I will handle it." You told your coworker who just nodded smiling and left you there.

The concert was wilder then ever, when you went out to smoke a cigarette you could see the queue which ended so far away you couldn't even see it. The band killed it today, better then ever.

You were cleaning the bar and the cups when someone sat in front of the bar. You turned around to see who it was. That freaking guitarist. He had his sunglasses on and was looking at his hands.

"Hello. What can I get you? Beer or something stronger?" You asked narrowing your eyes.

"Vodka please." You poured a cup and when he looked up to thank you he put his aviators on his nose to see you properly. "(Y/N)?"

"Seven hells! Robert is that you?!" Your eyes widened from the recognition and your mouth dropped. "I haven't see you in ages! What happened to you?"

"It's Mick, now actually. Well, a lot of things." He smiled from ear-to-ear. He was so glad to see you after all this time. You were best friends in high school, although Mick didn't really attend the classes since he was already into music in that time.

"Damn, I didn't even recognized you with this hair." You were laughing and your eyes were focused in him. He has changed a lot since you last met, he has his head dyed and was wearing leather clothes.

"Well, you didn't change a thing." Mick eyed you from head-to-toe and was smirking. "Though you might got taller."

"(Y/N), how many times do I have to tell you that you work here?" Your asshole boss yelled, you turned to him and gave him a fake smile. You started to clean the glasses again but stopped when he got out of sight.

"Well, that was my boss. He is a cool man, as you can see." You hummed and poured another drink for Mick and one for yourself. "Do you want to talk after my shift? It would be good to talk. Or is it a horrible idea? You know what, forget what I have just said. I'm sure you have many more important things to do and people to meet."

"No, no, no. It's a good idea and I would love to but..." Mick looked away searching for the others.

"Looking for your girlfriend?" You asked him hoping you weren't right.

"Nah. Just waiting for these idiots to do some shit. They can be pain in the ass sometime, you know. So (Y/N) if it's not a problem can we talk later? It was really good to see you but I gotta go. See you later." And with that he left you there. He didn't even ask for your number so it was obvious you won't meet again. Not that you were surprised. You just disappointed in him in many ways.

Damn, Mick Mars, what have you done? Did you just froze? Afraid from a girl who knew you more than yourself? Similar thoughts crossed Mick's mind who couldn't do anything with the situation. The only thing he knew that he wanted to meet again.

At that night you cried yourself to sleep. It was a long ago since you cried but Mick ditching you like this hurt like hell. Again. You forgave him after he just left couple of years ago during high school, now he did it again. Maybe the problem was with you. The next day you hardly talked to Jon and to your co-workers just only when needed to. There were no Mötley concert tonight so it was impossible to meet with Mick. When you finished your shift you walked instead of taking the bus. The night was quite chilly so you adjusted your pretty light jacket.

"Hey, baby! Where is the rush?" A guy called after you. You didn't pay attention to him cause you knew that's what these kind of people need so you kept walking on the street. Another guy approached you from the other side. You were trapped. Nice.

"What does a lovely girl do on the street this late in the night? You should be sleeping now, nah?"

"Leave me alone!" You spit.

"Look how wild she is." The guy said laughing to his mate. They were now only steps away. You wanted to shout from the top of lungs for help but you just couldn't. "Hmm you smell good." He sniffed and his face was inches away. You tried to remember every detail about him to know who to arrest. You put your hands on his chest and pushed him away and started to run. Luckily you were wearing your comfortable boots so you could run as fast as you can. Sadly, not fast enough. Those jerks were closer and closer. When you were about to stop and gave up, you heard engines of motorbikes. You continuined running and maybe stop them to help you.

"Not that fast, baby!" Just a few meters from the riders.

"Hey, hey! Please stop!" You shouted but one of your harassers got you and put his hand ony your mouth to shut you up. You tried to move his hand away but his grip was strong. "Okay, your little game ends now." He whispered angrily.

"Let her go, man!" A voice echoed but the man didn't move an inch. "I said let her go, dumbass!" Another man said.

"What did you just say?" He was furious as hell now. You took advantage of it and kicked him in the balls. You ran to the bikers who seemed familiar. The boys from the band. And Mick was standing there beside his bike, gazing you. Suddenly all the anger you felt for Mick disappeared. You ran into his arms crying and clenching on him. He rubbed your back until the drummer and the bassist chased away those jerks. The blondie singer put his jacket when he saw you shaking like a leaf.

"Th..thank you." You sniffed.

"Are you okay (Y/N)?" Mick asked looking down at you. "Do you need to go to the hospital or something?" Mick worried sick seeing you like this.

"You know her, Mick?" The singer looked shocked as well as the others.

"Yes. We...we were friends in high school. Now come (Y/N), we are bringing you home." You couldn't say a word so you just nodded and got on the bike behind Mick. You hold Mick for your dear life during the way. When you arrived home safely you thanked again and was about to enter the house.

"Umm, do you want to come in? I think I should..I should thank that you all saved me." The singer was grinning. "Not in that way, man! I have some beer in the fridge." They hesitated at first but couldn't say no to free beers.

You lived in a cute little house with one bedroom but that was more than enough for you. You let them in the living room and offered the promised booze. You were still shaking as hell so you told them you would take a quick shower. You couldn't believe you let in your house complete strangers (except for Mick) and you even let them alone in your living room. You had a pretty wild night and the amount of alcohol you drank at the Whisky was messing with you. When you got back to the living room, the band was looking at your family photos and was laughing at them. Well, some of them were indeed hilarious.

"Well, thank you for the hospitality (Y/N), but I think we should go. We arranged a meeting at a girls club not far away." The singer declared. "You can come if you want." He winked and looked back at you smirking.

"No, thank you. Also, here is your jacket." You handed him it back and was smiling at him. On the stage they all looked frightening and badass but in their normal being they were quite handsome and kind.

"Bye, (Y/N)."

"Bye Tommy." Nikki just nodded and followed the others. Mick was standing there thinking. He didn't want to leave you there alone, again. He recognised you were still in shock even if you hid it pretty well.

"I think I'm staying with (Y/N). You can go. We will meet in the studio tomorrow."

"Okay, old man. Also, have fun." The singer muttered and left the driveway laughing. Mick went back at the house rolling his eyes and managed to scare the shit out of you.

"Seven hells, Mick." You held your hand on your chest to make sure your heart was still pounding.

"I'm so sorry. I just thought you might don't want to be alone. And after leaving you there last night without saying any word I thought it might be good to have a talk and discuss all these things. But only if it's not a problem. I'm sure you are exhausted and want to go sleep and all." He turned around and opened the door again when you stopped in front of him, blocking the way.

"It's a good idea. I would...I would be glad if you stayed." You murmured looking down at your hands.

You two talked so much during the night you didn't even realized how sleepy you were.

It was almost sunrise when Mick demanded you to go to bed and sleep. You didn't reject at all and fell on the bed immediately, though you weren't able to sleep. You were rolling in the bed so many times it pissed you off so you went to drink water. You offered your coach for Mick for sleeping which he took gladly and was already sleeping. He woke up when he heard noise and was smirking seeing you in only a loose shirt. When you looked at him he closed his eyes back pretending to be sleeping. You drank your water glancing and admiring Mick. His looked so innocent and relaxed, you didn't want to bother him.

"Sleeping problems?" He asked still having his eyes shut.

"Yep." You muttered taking a sip from your water.

"(Y/N)? It might sound weird, but want to sleep like back in the days?" Your lips immediately curved into a smile and rushed to the coach. You helped Mick got up and went to the bedroom. After you got into bed Mick also laid beside you. He placed his arm on your waist and pulled closer to him. You weren't facing him but you could see the smile on his face. The smile which you were in love with since you met him.

∆

tag: @leatherandheels​

[sporadic-writer]

Welcome to the Neighborhood pt. 3

Harrison x American!reader (nothing hella specific other than mentioning the states, so try pretending if you aren’t American. If not.. sorry?)

Warnings: same as before, swearing, mentions of weed and alcohol (because I enjoy both safely and responsibly), and um I think that’s it.

Note: I made this a Harrison fic because I feel we need more of those in the world. Also, this fic doesn’t have like, an idk.. overarching story/theme yet? other than reader and Harrison stuff. Lastly, this fic is a result of bits of writing courage during a writer’s block mess. I have a better concept for the next chapter. So sorry this could count as a filler or fun simple read.

Part 1 here Part 2 here

°•●•°●°•●•°●°•●•°●°•●•°

"What about just a casual cookout?" This was the 3rd idea he has asked out loud.

Sam and Harry watched Harrison all but pace as he spit balled ideas to have their new neighbor over. The whole morning he was thinking through stuff to do that wasn't too much for quarentine. It was starting to end, but he didn't want to push anything.

The other men in his presence groaned. "Jesus just ask her to come hang out! No agenda, just invite her here to hang out and then you can get to know her!" Sam suggested in a shout back to his friend. "Stop fucking moping about here like a nervous puppy." That last statement was a quieter grumble.

Tuwaine nodded in agreement. "You're starting to get annoying Haz. We all like her, so having her here is fine. Then you buddy up to her in the process." This seemed to help the blonde settle.

"Harry! You talked to her a little more earlier today. Any info I can use to break the ice one on one?" Harrison looked to his friend hopefully.

The man in question rolled his eyes. "We barely talked. Her room and bathroom windows are right next to my room. We talked because she apologized thinking her music was loud and coming into mine. Then we made small talk a little before she went to the store."

An idea sparked in Harrison's head about conversation ideas next time he saw you. Music was always a great ice breaker. He remembered you wore a Green Day shirt one time, so that's something. Also, he has heard you singing to yourself on your deck; some Irish band his mother listened to sometimes. He mentally scanned his music selection in his room. Just then he heard a car door shut outside. He asked if it was you and Tom nodded yes after peaking out the window. He calmly dashed outside with Tuwaine and Sam following seeing what the commotion was. Plus, Sam left stuff in his car.

Walking towards your front door you heard your neighbor's open and noticed Harrison looking right at you. You looked over with wide at men rushing towards you, but smiled and greeted them once seeing their familliar faces.

"Hey guys!" You attempted a small wave with your things in your hands.

Sam and Tuwaine nodded and waved in repsonse. Harrison looked a little flustered. "Hey y/n. Um I had a question for you."

Your smile didn't help his nervousness. "Shoot." You replied while walking to your door, then working on unlocking it.

Upon no response, you looked at him to see him open and close him mouth once, and just had a slight 'umm' noise come out. It was sweet. There was a simplistic charm about people getting slightly nervous over being around othee people they were into. You were no fool, you had seem him peak glances at you through his yard and window upstairs. Now you watched him try to gain courage to simply ask you a question. You thought about doing it yourself, but you are a tad old school and see if the guy will get to it. Once impatient, you'll ask him. But now you watched him as his hair moved lightly in the breeze of the cool London air. Not to mention he looked handsome as ever in his sweater. Wonder if it is as soft as it looks...?

"Y/N! What are you doing tomorrow love?" Twuaine bit the bullet for Harrison since he couldn't get a full question out. You snapped out of your trance. Luckily the distance helped hide your embarrassment.

She checked the date on her phone lockscreen. "Umm I work tomorrow 7 to like 4. So after that a shower, maybe a nap, then nothing. Why?"

Rather than the one who asked reply, Harrison finally jumped in and spoke. "Want to come over tomorrow? We were going have dinner and watch the match and relax one more night for sure before things start up again for us." Tom just got final shooting schedules and he knew things would soon pick up for him most likely in following. As much as he loved being home, doing nothing, he did miss working. However, of course it happens after desiring more time with you.

"I would love to! What time?" The little bounce thing you did to balance your groceries and to open your door was precious to him.

"Um come by any time after you're home from work."

Sam piped in saying, "Match starts at 5 or 6 I think, around then is perfect."

"Awesome! Thanks for the invite guys. Also hey, do you guys know good pet stores around here? Sorry if that's random but I am running out of supplies and can't mooch off work.. new job and all."

"'Fraid not y/n. Sorry we don't know where Tom gets his dog stuff."

Harrison nodded in agreement. "Yeah and my dog is at home and my mum gets everything usually."

She shrugged. "No worries. Internet search it is. Well I gotta put these away. I'll see you guys tomorrow." They said their fairwells to her and did as she did, went inside. She didn't notice this time how her admirer watched her to see she got in alright.

After watching you get in your house, Sam shut the car door he opened earlier with his hat in hand, and Harrison sighed. He turned to his friends.

“I could have asked her over myself.” His tone suggested he knew he couldn’t. But that didn’t stop him from sulking back into his home. “I’m the one into her, I could have asked her over.”

“Mhmm sure Haz, an hour later after leaving your mouth open to catch flies. She’s coming over. Get over it and enjoy that your painful attempt was cut short.”

On that note he thanked his lucky stars and went into his home, not before hearing music come out of your open windows. He shazamed it and made a mental note to use it as a potential ice breaker tomorrow. Man he felt like a 15 year old.

*time skip*

It was around 4:30ish when Harrison saw your car pull into your driveway and you get out. Even with your hair up after a day of physical labor, uniform London Zoo shirt covered in dirt and a couple bleach stains, and basic khaki shorts; he still thought you looked pretty as ever. He was a little shocked you didn't look totally exhausted remembering you started work at 7am. That just impressed him more. Now he only had to wait an hour or so for you to be over and hanging out with him. Ground work would be set. He made sure his shirt, pants, and hair were in good sorts before relaxing on the couch with Sam. About an later, he heard the door open and a familiar voice greet everyone. However, not the voice he was expecting.

"Sis? What are you doing here?" He sat up as she rolled her eyes.

"Hello to you div."

He rolled his eyes right back. "Not what I meant. Just wasn't expecting you to drop in." He loves Charlotte, but didn't need her when a girl he's trying to get with is supposed to come by very soon.

"Harry has a camera for my friend to borrow for a class of hers. Why? You guys got plans or something? Look at me give a shit as I interrupt this rager." She moved about the house looking for the Holland she spoke of. He was about to blow her off and get her out but Tuwaine appeared out of nowhere to be a stellar friend.

"He does have plans actually. Tryin' to get with our fit American neighbor. Got all worked up and could barely ask her over tonight. He didn't actually, but not the point." His sister, who still hasn't left, smirks at him. “He’s into her and this is him ‘laying the groundwork’ or something.”

"Really?? Aw look he's blushing!" She poked his cheek. “Relax though, I’m just gonna find Harry or his cam, whichever comes first, and be out. Alright?”

Thanking his lucky stars he was about to tell her to just get on with it, but the doorbell rang. Harrison and his sister made eye contact, he pleaded with his to stay, hers glimmered with mischief, and they were off! Both siblings dashed for the door while Sam and Tuwaine enjoyed the show. The luck didn’t last, because Charlotte reached the door first. She kicked away the eager man and smiled as the she greeted who she assumed was the American girl her brother fancies.

Harrison saw you were turned around as you began to speak, looking at a car that honked for some reason, and as you entered your head was still looking down a tad. “Sorry I’m late, late-ish anyway. Rolled one after work, enjoyed it after the shower, then passed out for an unexpected nap - ah your new!” She locked eyes with his sister and if he could frame a mental image he would. Y/N looks like she wanted the ground to swallow her, and needed saving. She was clearly still a little buzzed, and a joint was sticking out of her beanie. “Well not new, but new to me I mean. Um ignore that first impression.. Hi! Y/F/N Y/L/N, their neighbor.” As she spoke, the hand holding a bottle of vodka tucked the joint discreetly further into the hat. Smooth, sorta..

“Charlotte, Harrison’s sister. Pleasure to meet you. That lot you speak of told me a touch about you. From the states ey? Very fun, caught Hazzy’s eye so watch out. I love him but he’s a bit dodgy on getting things done sooner than later.” She winked at her brother while the newest addition to the house just stood there taking it all in. “Now if you excuse me I shall find Harry’s camera.”

Harrison watched you follow his sister, who he will get back at later, out of the room. You still looked a tad surprised, but smiled through it anyway. Then you made eye contact with him and smiled brighter before saying, “I brought drinks!”

°•●•°●°•●•°●°•●•°●°•●•°

Taglist (crossed out means it didn't take yours): @jillanaholland @averyfosterthoughts @sarah-m-limelight-2007 @astridcommings

As always, like and reblog if you want. Hit me up if you want to be tagged or not, or if I forgot to tag you. Thanks for reading and enjoying! Lmk of there are any errors or stuff like that.

[softest-cinnamon-roll]

Hi if you’re taking requests could I have some bottom Richie? Thanks anyway, love your writing!

happy birthday, to you 

summary: It's Richie's birthday and Eddie wants him to have the best damn night of his life. words: 2,230rating: explicit a/n: this is me losing my bottom Richie virginity so please go easy on me! 

*click title to read on AO3

* * * * *

“Are you sure this is a good idea Eddie?” Bev asked as she helped Eddie set up the living room with candles in preparation for Richie’s birthday dinner. “I mean, we all know how much of a klutz Richie is, he might accidentally set fire to your apartment.”

Eddie laughed and rolled his eyes a little, “Don’t worry Bev, they’ll all be blown out before we get to the down and dirty, now come help me with the food in the kitchen.”

Bev smiled and followed Eddie into the kitchen, helping him set up the food for their picnic style dinner before she started on the icing on the cake. “You promise that we’ll all meet up for dinner tomorrow? I know you want to spend time with Richie alone tonight, but we all want to celebrate.”

“Of course!” Eddie smiled as he wiped his hands down on his apron. “We’ll all go out for dinner tomorrow night to a really nice restaurant. It feels like forever since we all spent a night out together.”

Once the icing on the cake was done, Bev stepped back to admire her handy work and clapped her hands, “Okay Eddie, I think we’re all done here.” She unhooked the apron from around her waist and hung it back up over the door. “Have a great evening tonight, spoil your boy rotten.”

Eddie smiled, wrapping his arms around her in a hug, “You’re amazing, Bev. I wouldn’t have been able to pull any of this off if you weren’t here to help me.” He pulled back to let her step towards the door.

Bev rolled her eyes and shook her head as she pulled her jacket over her shoulders, “Nonsense, you should give yourself more credit Eddie. You came up with this idea, you put it all together. I just baked the cake.”

With one last quick hug and a wink, Bev left, leaving Eddie alone in the apartment as he waited for Richie to get home from the radio station. He took the opportunity to go for a shower and quickly change into something nice, but not too distracting as he wanted Richie to actually enjoy his dinner before they got to the dessert.

And no, Eddie wasn’t referring to the cake sitting on the kitchen counter.

It was half an hour later when Eddie flicked the shower off and stepped out, drying himself and slipping into the clothes he had picked. Richie was due to be home in around fifteen minutes, so Eddie took a seat on the floor with the makeshift picnic and simply waited.

He heard Richie’s keys rattling in the door about ten minutes later and Eddie perked up, a smile making its way onto his face as he heard his boyfriend step through the door and kick his shoes off. Richie had gotten up before Eddie that morning, as he had to go into work for a meeting prior to his show, so he hadn’t even wished him a happy birthday yet.

The second Richie stepped into the living room, Eddie set off the party poppers, smiling like an idiot, “Happy Birthday!”

Richie blinked, the noise cleary taking him by surprise before he broke into a smile, “You did all this for me! Awh Eds you shouldn’t have!” He grinned, crossing the room and leaning down to kiss Eddie softly on the lips. “Thank you, I love you.”

“Happy birthday,” Eddie breathed again, this time against his lips. He pulled away, only because he too, didn’t want to get distracted. They had to eat their dinner first before they got to the down and dirty. “I made dinner in a picnic style, Bev helped too. Do you like it?”

Slowly, Richie pulled away and took a seat next to Eddie, wrapping his arm around his shoulder, “I love it, I never expected you to go through his much trouble for my twenty four birthday, it’s not that special.”

“We never got to celebrate last year, because you were out of town, so I wanted to make up for it,” Eddie explained and soon, they were tucking in to the delicious platter that Eddie had spend all day slaving over. Not to blow his own horn, but it was pretty damn tasty.

As soon as dinner was out of the way, Eddie shoved the empty tin bowls into the bin bag and stored away the leftovers in the fridge for tomorrow. Richie would no doubt eat them for breakfast. By the time Eddie came back to the living room, Richie was sprawled out on the blanket, grinning at him.

“So, what's for dessert?” He asked, waggling his eyebrows and Eddie had to stop himself from rolling his eyes as he let out a light laugh.

“Well…” Eddie started, making his way back over to his boyfriend and sitting on his lap. He felt Richie tense up a little and he held back a smirk. “There is cake in the kitchen that we could eat, or….you could let me rock your world birthday boy.”

Richie held back a moan and he closed his eyes. Eddie grinned and moved his hands into Richie’s hair, tugging his curls back to expose his neck and he pressed a kiss right on to his adams apple. “Fuck, Eds…” Richie breathed. “Please…”

Eddie pulled back and looked at Richie through his dark, lust filled eyes, “Please what, Rich? You gotta use your words.”

With another groan, Richie brought his lips to Eddie’s ear, his hot breath skimming over his skin, “I want you to fuck me.”

At first, Eddie wasn’t sure which way Richie was going to go for his birthday sex, but a part of him was hoping that Richie would ask Eddie to fuck him. He wanted to be able to make him feel nothing but absolute pleasure, and sometimes in order to do that, you need to be the one on the receiving end.

Without leaving any room for Richie to change his mind, Eddie leaned down and pressed their lips together in a kiss that was deep and passionate almost immediately. There was no working up to it, no easing one another in, it was clear the two of them were very turned on and they were eager to get to the bedroom as fast as they could.

Eddie stood up off of Richie’s lap and they scrambled to their feet, their lips meeting once more as they stumbled backwards to their bedroom. A giggle left Eddie’s lips as they tripped causing Richie’s back to hit the door of their room before he twisted the handle and they fell inside. Luckily they managed to keep their balance and continued on to the bed. Clothes were pulled off and thrown across the room until their were both just left in their underwear, and Richie fell backwards onto the bed.

“Eds you are so fucking hot,” Richie breathed, his hands moving over Eddie’s bare stomach and over his very lightly defined abs from all his working out. “All that gym work and running is really paying off because damn you are a snack!”

Richie was shut up after that by Eddie’s lips on his, kissing him deep and pushing his tongue into his mouth. His hands moved down over Richie’s stomach until their reached the waistband of his underwear, and he wasted no time in tugging them down and spreading Richie’s legs apart by the knees. Usually they would spend a while engaging in some light teasing foreplay, but Eddie had been thinking about this all day and he really didn’t want to wait any longer.

“Can I- fuck...can I fuck you now?” Eddie asked, his hips grinding down onto the mattress to take some relief away from his erection. At the same time, he wrapped a hand around Richie’s cock, stroking him to full hardness, grinning at the way his boyfriend squirmed and fell pliant to his actions.

“Eds- do you,” Richie cut off with a gasp as Eddie brushed his thumb over the tip of his cock. “Do you really need to ask?”

Taking Richie’s breathless moans and words as his go ahead, Eddie reached into their drawer and pulled out the bottle of lube and a condom. It wasn’t that they didn’t trust each other in regards to safe sex, they had engaged in barebacking before, but it was just so fucking messy. Unless they really wanted to spend time cleaning up, they usually just used a condom.

He settled between Richie’s legs and pressed a kiss to his inner thighs as he spread the lube over his fingers and brought two to Richie’s entrance. With a grin, Eddie realised that Richie was still stretched a little from their actions the previous night and he slipped two of them in, scissoring them just so when he added a third, it wasn’t too uncomfortable for Richie at first. Eddie knew Richie could take it, fuck, he’d fucked Richie with no preparation before, but it was his birthday and he wanted it to be as stress free as possible.

As Eddie crooked his fingers, Richie let out a wail, his hips rising off of the bed and pushing Eddie’s fingers in deeper. “Fuck Eds, fuck,” he gasped, running a hand through his curls, which were already sticking to his forehead with sweat. “I thought we weren’t teasing…”

“You really want it that bad?” Eddie asked, raising an eyebrow as he moved his fingers again, brushing over that spot inside Richie that turned him into a literal sobbing mess on the bed. “Okay okay, I did say no teasing.” He pulled the two fingers out and replaced them with three, moving them faster this time, stretching him open.

Once Eddie was sure Richie could take another, he slipped a fourth one in, brushing them against his prostate every few thrusts. He didn’t want him to come before the main event after all. Richie caught his attention by reaching down and wrapping a hand around the wrist that had fingers ass deep inside of him.

“M’ ready Eds, please,” Richie croaked and Eddie nodded, pulling his fingers out slowly. He reached for the condom and rolled it on. He was about to reach for the lube when he stopped, an idea popping into his head. Richie seemed to catch on and he tilted his head to the side, cheeks flushed with arousal. “Eds?”

Eddie just smirked and with one move, he flipped them over so Richie was on top and Eddie’s back was on the bed. He pressed the lube into Richie’s hands, his eyes sparkling. “I want you to ride me, Rich…”

Richie’s eyes widened for a moment before they turned lustful and he leaned down, pulling Eddie into a bruising kiss. “I fucking love you, you know just how to please me.” He gripped Eddie’s cock in his hand, stroking him a few times and Eddie had to hold back the urge to rock up desperately.

The cap of the lube was popped open and Richie poured a generous amount onto Eddie’s cock before he lined up and sunk down, taking all of Eddie in in one go. “Fuck, Richie holy shit!” Eddie moaned as he was engulfed in the heat. “Fuck, you’re just taking me in no problem at all. So greedy.” With a grin, Eddie rocked his hips up, his cock slamming against Richie’s prostate and making him moan. “Come on, ride me, Rich.”

It didn’t take much more convincing after that. Richie recovered a little, his breathing heavy and cheeks flushed and he started moving his hips, bouncing on Eddie’s cock slowly at first. Eddie pinched his hip, a signal for him to go faster and Richie reached for his hands, lacing his fingers together, a grounding technique, as he picked up the pace.

Moans of pleasure filled the room in between passionate kisses and Eddie managed to sit up against the headboard, the new position making him slide even deeper into Richie, hitting him in just the right spot. He could tell from the way Richie was gasping for air and breathing into his mouth, that he was close.

Slowly, Eddie reached down and grasped Richie’s cock in his hand, stroking him in time with his thrusts. He too was dangerously close, but he held himself off, wanting to get Richie right to the edge so they could come together. “Come on baby,” Eddie breathed. “Come for me, Richie.”

As soon as the words left Eddie’s lips, Richie was coming over their chests, his hands squeezing Eddie’s for dear life as he moaned into his mouth. Eddie followed quickly, coming into the condom with a groan as his hips fell still. As they sat there in the afterglow, breathing each other in, Eddie felt wetness on his cheeks and he pulled back.

“Richie? Are you- are you crying?” Eddie asked and quickly wiped away his tears. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”

Richie shook his head, “No- fuck no Eds,” he breathed, smiling at Eddie as though he were the sun. “I just- I love you so much. So fucking much.”

Eddie swooned a little and leaned down, pecking Richie’s lips. “Happy birthday, Rich,” he whispered. Soon, they’d move and clean up before going to indulge in some cake, but for right now...they were content.

* * * * *

@richietoaster @tozier-boy @eds-trashmouth @bitchbrak @sloppybitchreddie @its-stranger-than-you-think @maximusfraker @jem-carstairs-is-perfection @thejadeazalea @halfway-happy353 @tinyarmedtrex @inthebreadbinwrites @kat-ships-everything @takeourpure @lo-v-ers @mrs-vh @studpuffin @s-s-georgie @reddie-for-anything @trashmouthtozierr @richietoizer   @girasol-eddie @bi-bi-richie @honeybeehanlon @mars-14 @reddiesetandgo @marsisaplanetyall @xandertheundead @sedanleystanley @hawkinsbabe @beepbeeprichiellc @stellarbisexual @oldguybones @thundercatseddie @captainbartholomew @purplepoisonedgem @reddie-to-cryy @pink-psychic @violetreddie @fuzzylogik @queen-sock @appojoos @moonlightrichie @rreddies @disneyfan567 @annxmatron @lifesucksheres20bucks @anellope @roobarrtrashmouth @are-you-reddie-for-it @callmechee @nancynwheeler @reddieforlove @twoidiotsinl0ve @madi-artist 

[ellewritesathing]

So Close - S.S. XV

Summary: The universe has a funny way of putting the things you want right in front of you, but just out of reach. Stiles and Y/N have been best friends ever since Scott brought him home, but when Stiles realizes that he might want to be something other than best friends, she leaves to go to some fancy private school up North. Now that she’s back though … maybe he’s got a shot? A Teen Wolf AU in which the reader has always been so close to Stiles and yet so far.

Prologue - S2E1 Part 1 - S2E2 + S2E3 Part 2 - S2E4 + S2E5 + S2E6 Part 3 -  S2E7 +S2E8 Part 4 - S2E9 + S2E10 Part 5 - S2E11 + S2E12 Part 6 Part 7 - S3AE1 Part 8 - S3AE2 + S3AE3 Part 9 - S3AE4 Part 10 - S3AE5 + S3AE6 Part 11 - S3AE7 + S3AE8 Part 12 - S3AE9 + S3AE10 + S3AE11 Part 13 - S3AE11 + S3AE12 Part 14 Part 15 - S3BE1 + S3BE2

Word-count: 4.5k+

A/N: sir, that is my emotional support cora hale and she will not be leaving for south america any time soon. also here’s the link to my playlist that no one asked for

(double also swearing seems to be becoming a habit in these? there’s one near the beginning of this part) 

Showering used to be the best part about getting ready for school. Once you dragged yourself out of bed, showering was the perfect way to wake up and warm yourself up before confronting whatever was outside the bathroom door. You could put your brain on autopilot and just breathe. Now you hated it. 

Autopilot now meant daydreams of you turning into some monster and killing your friends. In one of them, you pretty sure you ate someone on the lacrosse team. Not exactly something you want to be thinking about at six o’clock in the morning - or ever. Luckily, the universe seemed to sense your stress levels this morning and let you have your shower in peace. 

You stepped out and wrapped a towel around yourself before wiping away the steam that collected on the mirror. You frowned when you saw your reflection. Something wasn’t right. Something hadn’t felt right in the shower, but you figured no daydreams meant nothing weird. 

You leaned over the sink to get a better look. Your skin was fine. Your eyes were the same. You still had all your hair. But then you saw it. Two white protrusions sticking out of your mouth. Gingerly, you lifted your upper lip with your hands and there they were. Fucking fangs. 

You didn’t know what to do. It’s not like you’d been bitten or anything. How could you have gotten them? Why now when it wasn’t even a full moon? Were you cursed? Was it- 

“Hey, are you done yet?” Cora banged on the door as she spoke. You got such a fright that you jumped and dropped your towel. “The guys need to shower and I have to get to school early to study for-” 

“Yeah- yeah, I’ll be right out,” you shouted back, crouching down to pick up your towel. How were you going to explain this to them? 

Only … when you looked back in the mirror they were gone. You had nothing to explain to anyone. Your friends could live out the rest of this year in peace, and all you had to do was not mention the fact that you were seeing things. 

---

“God, is it always this bright out?” you mumbled as you got out of Cora’s car. Isaac had driven with - which meant you’d squished into the backseat - so getting out was more of an ordeal. 

“We live in California,” Isaac said. “It’s usually brighter out.” 

You rolled your eyes and slammed the car door in frustration. The noise was way too loud and you winced, but the others didn’t seem to notice. They were walking ahead. 

“You coming?” Cora asked, turning to look at you. She looked concerned. 

“Yeah, I just need to talk to Stiles about something.” It was a cheap lie, but the only one you could think of when you saw the Jeep pull in. “I’ll catch up with you later.” 

You waited until they were gone and started walking in the other direction. Down the stairs. Past the laughing teenagers. Away from the gushing water fountain. Far from the guys playing soccer that were not only yelling but making your head throb every time they kicked the ball.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Stiles caught your arm and you stopped and stared at him. You just noticed how frantic your breathing was. And that you were on the opposite end of the school. “Are you alright?” 

“I-” You didn’t know how to answer. You nodded and Stiles tilted his head to the left. 

“Y/N, are you alright?” he repeated. The places where he held onto your arms felt like they were burning. “It’s happening to me too.” 

You stared at him, refusing to believe that he was going through the same thing. He was fine. “No, it’s not.” 

“Nightmares?” Stiles asked. “Seeing things? Panic attacks?”

“Stiles, you can’t …” You trailed off when you saw Lydia and Allison walking over to you. In the quietest voice you could manage, you rushed out, “How do you know?” 

“Because it’s happening to all three of you,” Lydia said simply as they joined the group. 

“Where’s Scott?” Allison asked. “We should talk.” 

You guys found Scott but there was no way you’d have enough time to talk things through unless you skipped first period. An idea that Stiles was advocating for, despite your protests that you had a test first period.

“Well, well, well,” Lydia hummed as you walked through the school doors. “Look who’s no longer the crazy one.”

“We’re not crazy,” Allison told her.

Lydia spun around and looked at the three of you. “Hallucinating? Sleep paralysis? Yeah, you guys are fine.”

“You did die and come back to life,” Scott said. “That’s gotta have side effects, right?” 

You were about to answer when the bell rang. You covered your ears. It had been so loud the past few days. They were all staring at you when you pulled your hands away so you started talking before they could. 

“I’ve gotta go. English is on the other side of this building and I don’t want to be late.” 

---

“Maybe you guys just need a little more time to get back to normal,” Scott said hopefully. 

You were standing by his and Stiles’ lockers, and the only reason you were there was because you didn’t want it to look like you were avoiding them. Which you were. But they didn’t need to know that. 

“Yeah, try not to forget that we hit the reset button on a supernatural beacon for supernatural creatures,” Stiles said as he put in his combination for his lock. It was taking him longer than usual. “There’s a pretty good chance of things never going back to normal.” 

Stiles started shaking his lock and staring at the numbers on the dial. You reached over and put your hands around it. “Here. Let me try?” 

He didn’t say anything but he moved out of your way. You could feel him watching you as you put the combination in. You glanced at Scott to see why he was so quiet but he was staring down the hallway at something. Or someone. The new girl.

“There,” you said once the lock clicked into place. You smiled at him but he was still staring at the lock. You reached out and touched his arm. He jumped. “Hey, you okay?” 

“Fine.” You both knew it was a lie. Your phone beeped before you could say anything. 

“Uh, Cora says Lydia and Allison are going into the woods,” you said after reading the text. “She’s following them to make sure nothing happens.” 

“Yeah, that’s great,” Scott said. You didn’t even know he’d zoned back into the conversation. “We’re all keeping an eye on one another, right?” 

“Something like that,” Stiles mumbled as he grabbed his books from his locker. He shut the door and you recoiled slightly. They didn’t seem to notice, and you lied about needing to be somewhere before they could.

---

“The arrow almost went right through Lydia’s skull,” Cora finished. 

The four of you were in your room talking about what had been happening since the night you, Stiles, and Allison sacrificed yourselves for your parents. One of the perks of living together was that it made secret conversions so much easier to have.

“Why was she aiming at Lydia?” you asked, curling your legs up to your chest.

“She said she saw her aunt,” Cora said with a slightly exasperated expression. 

“Whatever’s happening to you guys is getting worse,” Isaac said. He looked over at you and you pretended not to notice. 

“Yeah, I kinda got that.” The words were harsh and you closed your eyes, frustrated. Scott rubbed your back to calm you down. 

“Stiles is getting worse, too,” he said. “So, Y/N … is it getting worse for you?” 

“Yes,” Cora answered for you. 

You glared at her. “You said you wouldn’t tell!” 

“That was before Allison tried to kill Lydia. Which would have worked, by the way, if I wasn’t there to stop it,” she said. She gave you a sympathetic smile. “This is bigger than us now.” 

“So what’s happening?” Scott asked. 

“Well, you guys know about the nightmares,” you said softly. “But they’re getting worse. They’re happening when I’m awake. And everything is … too much. I don’t know how to explain it. Stiles closed his locker earlier and it felt like my head was going to explode it was so loud.” 

“And you complained about the light,” Isaac added. 

“Sensory overload,” Scott said. “I had it when I turned.” 

“But I haven’t been bitten!” 

“But you live with the three of us,” Cora started. “It could be your brain trying to warn you to … to protect yourself. If you’re afraid of being turned.” 

You looked down. You’d never spoken about it with Scott but he knew you wanted to stay human, and you freaked out when Isaac tried to get Derek to turn you. It wasn’t that big of a stretch to believe that you were afraid. 

“I don’t know,” you said eventually. “But I think we should talk to Deaton.”

“Seconded,” Isaac said. 

“Third.”

You looked at Scott and for a second he just looked tired. He must have been exhausted by dealing with this practically every day since his sophomore year. 

“I’ll take you after school,” he said, smiling at you. “You guys should get some sleep. Sounds like we’re gonna have a long day tomorrow.”

---

“Okay, so we just have to figure out what happens to a person who almost dies and wakes up hearing and feeling things that they shouldn’t be able to hear and feel,” you said. “Simple.”

“And is unable to tell what’s real or not,” Stiles added. 

You were sitting in between him and Scott, and he was bouncing his leg so much that he was shaking the bench. You reached out and put your hand on his knee. He stopped almost instantly. 

“And is being haunted by demonic visions of dead relatives,” Allison finished. She seemed just as on edge as you and Stiles.

“They’re all locked up because they’re all insane,” Isaac said, not even looking up from whatever he was writing. Cora hit his arm. 

“Can you at least try to be helpful?” Stiles asked. “Please?”

“For half my childhood I was locked in a freezer,” Isaac started. “So being helpful is kind of a new thing for me.”

“Dude, are you still milking that?” Stiles asked. 

“Yeah, maybe I am still milking that, Stiles.” 

You took your hand off Stiles’ knee and placed it on his chest, and extended your other hand to touch Isaac’s arm. “Okay, we get it. You’re tragically scarred but can we please get back to-” 

You fell quiet when the girl Scott had been staring at yesterday walked up to the table. 

“Hi,” she smiled. She was nervous. “Hi, sorry. I couldn’t help overhearing what you guys were talking about. And I think I actually might know what you’re talking about.” 

You all exchanged nervous glances. 

“There’s a Tibetan word for it,” she went on, “It’s called ‘Bardo.’ It literally means ‘in-between state.’ The state between life and death.”

“And what do they call you?” Lydia asked. Her words were nonthreatening enough but her tone told a different story.

“Kira,” Scott answered. She smiled at him. “She’s in our History class.” 

“So are you talking Bardo in Tibetan Buddhism or Indian?” Lydia asked, still on the offensive. 

“Either, I guess.” Kira sat down next to Stiles and you all shuffled over to make room for her. “But all the stuff you guys were just saying? All that happens in Bardo. There are different progressive states where you can have hallucinations. Some you see, some you just hear. And you can be visited by peaceful and wrathful deities.”

“Wrathful deities?” Cora repeated. “What kinds?”

“Demons,” Kira answered. 

“Oh, demons,” Stiles echoed. He looked over at you and pulled a face. “Yeah, why not?”

“Hold on,” Allison started. “If there are different progressive states, then what’s the last one?”

“Death,” Kira said simply. “You die.” 

You all fell silent. 

“Well, thanks for your help,” you smiled. “That really helps us with our mystery RPG.” 

“Your mystery RPG?” Kira repeated slowly, sounding confused. 

“It’s a new thing,” Stiles said. “Very exclusive.” 

---

“It sounds like your subconscious is trying to communicate with you,” Deaton said after Scott and Stiles told him what happened during Econ. You didn’t realize that things had gotten so bad for him. 

“Well, how do I tell my subconscious to use a language that I actually know?” Stiles asked. 

“Do you remember what the sign language looked like?” Deaton asked. “The placement and the movement of the hands?” 

“You know sign language?” Scott asked. He seemed impressed. 

“I know a little,” Deaton smiled. “Let me give it a shot.” 

“Okay, the first one was like this.” Stiles held out his index finger and used his other hand to circle it. 

“That’s ‘when.’”

“Then there was this-” He put his two hands together and moved his right hand towards him ‘-Twice.” 

“That’s ‘door.’”

“With this in between.” He closed his hand and put his thumb to his chin, pulling down away from himself. 

“That’s it?” Deaton asked. Stiles nodded. “When is a door not a door?” 

“When is a door not a door?” Stiles repeated. 

“When it’s ajar,” Scott said quietly. It gave you goosebumps. It reminded you of the dream you had weeks ago.

“You’re kidding me,” Stiles said. “A riddle? My subconscious wants to tell me a riddle?”

“Not necessarily,” Deaton said. “When the three of you went under the water, when you crossed from the unconsciousness to a kind of ‘superconsciousness’ … You essentially opened a door in your minds.” 

“What do you mean?” you asked. You crossed your arms over yourself. “Our doors are still open?”

“Ajar,” Deaton nodded.

“A door into our minds?” Stiles asked. 

“I did tell you it was risky,” Deaton said.

“What do we do about it?” Scott asked. 

“Well, that’s difficult to answer,” Deaton sighed. 

“Wait a second, I know that look,” Stiles said. “That’s the ‘we know exactly what’s wrong with you, but we have no idea how to fix it’ look.” 

“One thing I do know is that having an opening like that into your mind … it’s not good. You each need to close that door,” Deaton said. “And you need to do it as soon as possible.”

“I, uh-” you scratched your head. “I had a dream. A little while ago. I was sleeping and … and my door was open. I went to close it and-” You looked at Stiles. You couldn’t admit that you dreamt about him. “And Cora told me not to. She started out really nice but she changed. She didn’t want me to close the door.” 

“I had a dream like that too,” Stiles said quietly. “I went through the door.” 

You shook your head. “I slammed it shut.” 

“But you’re still having hallucinations?” Deaton asked. 

You nodded. 

He took another breath. “This can’t be good.” 

---

You and Mel came home with takeout in hand, but something wasn’t right. There was yelling coming from inside the house. You heard Scott telling someone to get out. It couldn’t have been Cora or Isaac; he’d never tell them to leave. 

“I can’t believe that you’d do this to my best friend!” Scott yelled. 

“I’m not doing anything to your friend,” Rafael said, trying to maintain a steady voice. “I’m doing my job.” 

“Your job sucks!”

“Some days, I can’t argue with that.” 

“Can somebody please tell me what the hell is going on?” Melissa asked as she stepped closer.

“He’s trying to get Stiles’ dad fired,” Scott said, not taking his eyes off your dad. 

“No, that’s not true,” Rafael argued. 

“Then what are you doing?” you asked, crossing your arms and glaring at him.

“Conducting a case for impeachment,” Rafael said.

“That sounds a lot like getting him fired,” Melissa said. 

“The lack of resolution and inability to close cases is what’s getting him fired,” Rafael said. “My job is just to collect the information.” 

“Well, your job sucks!” you snapped. Looking over, you saw that Scott’s claws were starting to come out and you bumped your mom’s hand. She needed to distract Rafael so you could help him. 

“Scott, sweetheart,” Melissa said, moving closer to him. She held his hands, evidently taking the job you wanted. “Calm down. Come with me right now.”

She led Scott out of the room and Rafael looked like he was going to follow, so you started walking to the kitchen and stomping as loud as you could so he had no choice but to follow. 

“Y/N, I’m just doing my job! The job that let me visit all those times when you were at Willow Creek,” he said. “The job that you used to think made me a superhero.”

“Well, maybe now I think it makes you a supervillain,” you said simply. You started unpacking all the food.

He sighed and rubbed his face. “You know I wouldn’t do this if I had another option.” 

“Wouldn’t you?” you asked. “You hate Stiles’ dad. I know you do. And you don’t like Stiles either.” 

“I don’t like the relationship he has with you,” Rafael said. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t like him. He’s just a kid.” 

“And what about Stiles’ dad?” 

He got quiet. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” you said. You grabbed the box with your food in it and stormed past him to eat in your room. 

---

“I’m sorry, you took her doll?” you asked. That was honestly the most unbelievable part of what Scott and Stiles were telling you. Nine-year-old girl trapped in coyote form due to trauma? Believable. Stiles getting over his fear of creepy dolls? Not so much. 

“And why didn’t you tell either of us about this?” Cora asked. “We could have helped.” 

“We didn’t know,” Scott said in his ‘everyone play nice’ voice. Cora rolled her eyes. 

“Besides, what do you know about any of this, huh?” Stiles asked. 

“Well, considering that I lived by myself in South America for seven years,” Cora started. “I think I’ve seen a few more things than you have.” 

Stiles gave her a look and was about to say something snippy, so you put your hand on his arm and focused on Scott. 

“Okay, well, what’s the plan?” you asked. “We just go into the woods and … ask her really nicely to turn back into a human?” 

“Alphas can force a change if they’re powerful enough.” Cora looked at Scott, sizing him up. “You haven’t done much with your new powers, have you?” 

“We haven’t really had the time,” Scott admitted. “Can you show me how to do it?” 

“I can try,” Cora said. “It’s not really something you teach. It’s just … something you feel.” 

“Something you feel,” Stiles repeated. “Well, that sounds like a great plan, but you’ll understand if we talk to Deaton first, right?” 

“Actually, that would make me feel a lot better,” Cora said, looking away for a moment as she took a breath. 

Stiles looked like he immediately regretted being so snippy before. He mumbled an apology.

“So let’s all meet there after school, okay?” you said. 

You were anxious pretty much the rest of the day, and the light was bothering you more than usual. You knew it was because of this whole Malia thing, but you couldn’t stop the feelings that were coming over you. By the time Deaton came back with xylazine, you’d uncrossed and recrossed your arms several times and knocked over one of the displays in the waiting area. 

“It’s a tranquilizer for horses,” Deaton explained. “For a werecoyote, expect it to work within seconds. I only have three so whoever’s shooting needs to be a damn good shot.”

“Allison’s a perfect shot,” Scott said. 

“She used to be,” Cora pointed out. 

“She can do it,” Scott insisted. 

“If we manage to find the thing,” Isaac said. 

“Okay, what is the point of them?” Stiles asked, pointing at Isaac and Cora. “Aside from the persistent negativity and gross PDA?” 

The two of them smiled at one another and Stiles groaned in response. 

“They’re here because they’re the only supernatural backup we’ve got,” you said. “And because they bring up things that we don’t want to think about.” 

“Yeah, like ‘how do we turn a coyote back into a girl, when she hasn’t been a girl for eight years?’” Isaac said.

“Actually, Scott and I spoke about that one,” Cora said. “He’s gotta trust his instincts. Let the alpha take over.” 

“But this is a werecoyote,” Deaton pointed out. “Who’s to say that it will even work if Scott can find it in himself to do it?” 

“I can do it,” Scott said. He nodded, trying to get himself to believe it. 

“We need a real alpha,” Stiles said. “You know what I mean! An alpha who can do alpha things. You know, an alpha who can get it going. You know, get it …” 

“Up?” Isaac suggested. 

Cora cleared her throat next to you and tried not to laugh. You focused on not throwing up.

“Great,” Scott said. “So I’m an alpha with performance issues.”

“You’ll be fine,” you said and rubbed his back. 

“What about the twins?” he asked. “Cora can’t teach me because she’s never been an alpha but they …” 

“They’re not alphas anymore,” Deaton said. “After what Jennifer did - almost killing them? It broke that part of them.” 

“Besides, no one’s seen them since whatever happened at the ice skating rink,” you said. You didn’t want to work with the twins again. 

“Well actually, that’s, uh, not totally true,” Stiles said. You gave him a look. “Lydia’s been …” 

“Ew. I don’t wanna know.” You pulled a face. You loved her but she had the worst taste in guys. “Okay, well, you guys are doing that on your own. Call me when it’s time to find Malia.”

---

You and Cora got out of the Porsche just as everyone else pulled up to the preserve. None of you spoke to each other but you all exchanged some pretty significant looks. Not only was changing Malia risky, but something was wrong in those the woods. You could feel it.

“Anyone else think we might be doing more harm than good?”  Lydia asked, effectively summing up your thoughts on the matter. 

“We’re trying to keep a father from killing his own daughter,” Scott said. 

“Actually, we’re trying to keep a guy from killing a coyote,” Isaac corrected, “Who is actually his daughter, who we don’t know how to change from a coyote back to his daughter.”

“And again with the not helping,” Stiles said from where he was leaning on the Jeep.

“Okay, let’s just-” you sighed and ran a hand through your hand. “Let’s split up, okay? I’ll take Cora, and Isaac will make sure Allison takes okay. Stiles and Lydia will stay here in case anything happens.” 

“Who do I go with?” Scott asked. 

“Malia,” you said. “That’s a pretty important part of this plan.” 

“Oh, yeah,” Scott said sheepishly. “Right.” 

You rolled your eyes but pulled back when you heard a gunshot. Scott got back on his bike and immediately started charging into the woods, with Isaac right behind him. You and Cora took off after them and Allison wasn’t too far behind. 

Another gunshot. 

You weren’t sure where everyone was, but at least you and Cora were together. Until something happened to Isaac. His scream echoed through the woods and you covered your ears. Cora hesitated, not wanting to leave you alone but clearly worried about Isaac. 

“Go,” you told her. “You’re faster than me. I’ll catch up.”

She nodded and took off. 

You took a shaky breath and kept going until you stepped on something hard and smooth. The rest of the woods was mulchy and uneven. Slowly, you looked down and took out your phone. 

“Hey, Stiles.” Your voice didn’t sound like it usually did. In fairness, you weren’t usually stuck in a bear trap. “I’m a little stuck, can you come help me?” 

You heard Lydia yelling at Stiles not to leave her alone, but soon he was running up to you. 

“Oh, my god. What happened?” he asked. He held onto your shoulders while he checked to make sure you were okay. 

“I’m standing on a trap,” you said. “If I move, it’s going to snap shut. And I don’t know if you heard Isaac’s scream when he stepped in one of these but-” 

“That’s not gonna happen to you. Alright?” Stiles said. “I’m not gonna let that happen to you.”

“I don’t know how to get out of this thing,” you rushed out. “Do you?” 

“No, but I mean…” he took a breath. “It can’t be that hard, right?” 

You choked out a laugh as he knelt down to inspect the trap. Your hands were shaking. 

“So good news is there’s a warning label on the side here,” Stiles said. “Bad news is that I can’t read.” 

“You can’t read,” you repeated. Stiles nodded and you took another breath. “Okay, that’s not- that’s not a problem. Take a deep breath. You can figure this out, Stiles. You’re the smartest person I know. You can do this.” 

“Y/N, I don’t know if I can,” Stiles said softly. “I think we should wait for the others.” 

“Stiles, there isn’t time for that.” Your voice was small and strained. You felt like you were about to cry. “I know you can do this, okay? I believe in you.” 

It took him a few moments but he moved some of the shrubbery and looked at the trap more closely. He found what you guessed was a release valve. He told you to move your leg out as fast as you could when he turned it. 

“Okay, are you ready?” he asked. You nodded. “Here we go.”

He cranked the dial and you leaped to the side, off-balance and clumsy. The trap closed shut at about the same time that you landed on top of Stiles, knocking him down to the ground. You laughed and moved a leaf out of his hair. 

“Thank you,” you whispered. You were so close that you felt him shaking underneath you. 

“Yeah, anytime,” he said breathlessly. His heart was pounding in his chest. Were you making him nervous? “Besides, you know I’m a leg man.” 

You laughed and pushed yourself up into a seated position. You held out a hand for Stiles to get up. “Shut up, Stilinski.” 

“What? I’m just-” 

A low growl rang out through the woods and you shared a look. You laughed again at the ridiculousness of the situation and Stiles laughed with you. 

“Now that’s what I’m talking about!” he cheered. “He totally got it up!”

“Okay, that’s just gross.” You pulled a face. “He’s still my brother.” 

“Yeah, you’re right. That crossed a line. Definitely crossed a line”

Part 16

[spootiliousrps]

Wolfstar Charms

You both like sirius/remus.

Stranger: [6th year, Remus hasn't told his friends about the werewolf gig yet.] Hey, so. I heard you talking to McKinnon after Magical Creatures today. Is that how you really feel about werewolves and vampires? Marlene was saying some pretty hard shit.-R

You: Well, I don't know what was said, but yeah. I mean, they attack anyone that gets close enough and spread their condition like a disease. They're better off where they can be kept an eye on that let loose in the world. -S

Stranger: But like. Every werewolf? -R

Stranger: And they only turn one night every month -R

You: But how can you be sure? I mean maybe not constantly but at least as their cycle gets closer. You heard what the professor said, they're practically monsters. I would feel safer if something was done about them. I'm not saying to kill them but something should be done. Even if its requiring them to be locked up during that time. -S

You: Why are you so curious about this anyways? -S

Stranger: I don't know. I just think it's wrong to prosecute an entire race of people, some of which may have done nothing wrong. -R

Stranger: There's bad ones, sure, but like. Thats not everyone. Just like not every pure blood is evil. -R

Stranger: Should we round up all of you lot and lock you up? -R

Stranger: I--fuck, I'm usually more eloquent about this, I'm just tired. -R

You: Whoa! Hey! That is not the same thing! I'm not saying to enslave them or anything like that! Locking them up during a transformation is humane! It would be for the protection of both them and the people around them. I know its not their fault. I'm not an idiot. -S

Stranger: It's inhumane to lock anyone up. -R

You: [Delay] Yeah... you usually are lol. I'm not use to seeing you so riled up. Whats got you so tired. -S

Stranger: Like -- would you want to lock me up for the week before the full moon if I was a werewolf or something? -R

Stranger: You said they're basically monsters -R

Stranger: Nothing, it's nothing. I just didn't sleep well, okay? -R

You: They are. Basically monsters I mean... but that doesn't make the people they infect monsters. I mean... the beast that comes out at night is not the person they are the rest of the time yeah?-S I mean, I never really considered it but... Would you have a better idea? Look at it from the person's point of view. You heard about the wizard that woke up after a cycle to find he had slaughtered his whole family? Sure, it sounds cruel when you explain it like that but they guy ended up offing himself cuz he couldn't live with what he had done. If I were a werewolf I'd want to be locked up during my cycle to protect you guys. I mean, I wouldn't know what I'd do if I hurt one of you. -S Maybe you should talk to one of the Ravenclaws, they might be able to slip you something to help sleep a bit better. A charm or something? -S

Stranger: I'm sure the werewolves that actually care take proper precautions. -R

Stranger: There was that one, sure, but. -R

Stranger: All the wolves in the media are all those nasty ones, that just was to cause mayhem. They should be punished for their crimes sure, but you can't control an entire race, that's not right

Stranger: I know plenty of charms. -R

You: Listen, Remus. I'm not going to pretend like I know why you have such a hard on for werewolves' rights suddenly and I'm also not going to pretend like I know everything. You asked and I told you. If you have a better idea for dealing with them then great. As far as I'm concerned it doesn't really involve me and its not like I'm going to write a strongly worded letter to the Minister to try and convince him of anything. Regardless of how either of us feels if a werewolf attacks us in the middle of the night I'm not going to be too torn up for defending myself. -S

Stranger: ..right. Sure. -R

Stranger: I'm going to go nap in Pomfrey's office. -R

You: Probably for the best. Want me to come fetch you for lunch? -S You're even worse when you don't eat. -S

Stranger: Um -R

Stranger: Maybe, I don't know. -R

Stranger: I can ask Peter to bring me something -R

You: [Delayed] If you're sure. Let me know if you change your mind. I promised James I'd meet him on the pitch before third so I won't be doing much. -S

Stranger: you'll be late for transfig -R

You: Wouldn't be the first time. -S

Stranger: Gonny's gonna murder you -R

You: I'd like to see them try. Besides, Lily is suppose to be there too. No one ever gets on to her. -S

Stranger: well.. I hope you guys have a nice time. -R

You: It'd be nicer if you would join us. -S

Stranger: um -R

Stranger: I can see if I can grab some coffee. -R

You: Awesome! I'll swing by the kitchens and bribe one of the house elves for those sweets you like so much. -S

Stranger: sure, yeah. -R

Stranger: I'll see you on the pitch then. -R

You: [[Switch to para?]]

Stranger: [[sure!!]

Stranger: [[I can start]]

You: [[Sounds good]]

Stranger: Every bone in his body hurt before the full moon. Every movement was filled with pain, and the entire week of the moon he felt like he wanted to crawl out of his skin. And he would've, if it meant that it'd stop. Remus dragged a hand through his hair as he made the hike down the hill from the castle to the quidditch pitch, slipping onto the field without being seen. James and Lily were already there, talking quit close together over on the edge of the field. He raised a hand to offer a hello, a grimace on his face with each movement.

You: "Remus!" Sirius called from Remus' right. He was still a few yards away an bulging cloth tucked under his right arm, a few pastries peaking out from beneath it. His left was tugging on a Peter's elbow as the other boy seemed to shift his gaze this way and that as if worried they'd be caught and taken to the dungeon's at any moment. "There you are! I was worried I might have to go to Pomfry's office after al-" he cut himself off as he drew up close enough to make out the boy's expression. "Christ, you look like shite. You weren't kidding earlier were you?"

Stranger: It wasn't fun, being woken up in the middle of the night with agonizing pain. He glanced over to Sirius as he came over to him, and he offered a small smile. "Yeah, I uh, rallied. I have my coffee in my bag so, hopefully that'll get me through potions later." Hey sighed. He nodded to Peter, and glanced back over at Lily and James. "It's fine though. Like I said, I just. Didn't really sleep." he had bags under his eyes, his face a little sunken in. "Whatcha got there?"

You: Sirius glanced down at the bundle as if he had forgotten about it entirely. "Oh, right!"

You: [sorry wasn't done]

Stranger: [nw]

You: Sirius glanced down at the bundle as if he had forgotten about it entirely. "Oh, right! I told you I was gonna swing by the kitchens. Swung by the potion's classroom too," he added with a wink and a grin. "Got a surprise for ya." "I-I had n-nothing to do with it," Peter rushed as if that would save him any grief should they be caught. Sirius just rolled his eyes and pulled him onward as he headed for James and Lily, obviously expecting Remus to follow. "Snatched a few Wideeye potions from the stores while Slughorn was distracted," Sirius admitted, still grinning proudly.

Stranger: Remus laughed softly, shaking his head as he followed them over towards James and Lily. "You're gonna get caught one day, you know?" he said teasingly. "I'd be nervous if Slughorn's rage came down on me, man. He's old but I can tell he's gotta temper." He stifled a yawn into his arm, and let out a puff of air. "I have so much course work to get done tonight." He frowned.

Stranger: [hey im jumping in the shower rq I'll be like. less than ten minutes]

You: "Well my luck hasn't run out yet," Sirius teased lightly. "Oi! James! Stop making pillow eyes at Lilly and get a move on!" Sirius called out to his friend with a laugh before focusing back on Remus. "Luckily for you, of course. Otherwise who would be here to pick you up when you need it ah? Peter?" he teased, elbowing the chubby boy in the ribs. "I-I... T-thats not..." "Relax Peter. I'm only teasing, lighten up."

You: [[Take your time. If we get disconnected I'll be under the tag spootilious]]

Stranger: [back! just gotta get like dried off[

You: [[wb]]

Stranger: Remus watched Sirius for a moment, shaking his head. "Maybe James?" he offered, snorting softly. As they approached, James flipped Sirius off, focusing back on Lily for a moment. "--Did we skip Transfigurations just to watch you talk to some lass?"

You: "No offense, Lilly," Sirius added as if as an after thought. He was a brave and reckless boy sure but he knew better than to piss off a woman, especially on that was such a talented witch. "You could do better than this sod," he teased lightly practically jumping into James' lap and ruffling his hair.

Stranger: "Yes, absolutely no offense," Remus agreed, nodding. Lily just let out a soft laugh. "Of course. Why'd we all come out here, James, did you want to go show off on that broom of yours?" she prodded at his side. Remus sat down heavily, a small grunt escaping him with the hard movement.

You: Sirius's gaze followed Remus' movements and despite his outward jovial appearance, worry lined his eyes. Typically he would have wrestled with James a bit, mock flirting with him, but as it was he allowed the other boy to shove him from his lap, depositing him next to Remus with a grunt of his own. "Rude," Sirius mock pouted but shifted back a bit to give himself room. He laid out the cloth, sweets still piled in the middle. Without hesitation he took two from the top and offered one out to Remus before shoving the other in his mouth.

Stranger: He didn't even want to know how completely like shit he must look like. And tomorrow, he would be concealing his bruised and battered body just like he did every day after a full moon. He glanced over at Sirius as he laid out the pile of sweets and pastries. He smiled, softly, and took the offered treat. "Thanks," he said softly, taking a bite. He let out a long sigh, and leaned his head on the man's shoulder, puffing out a breath.

You: Sirius tried to be as still as possible for the other man, only moving to reach into his robes and produce the small vile of wideeye potion he promised. Peter sank down next to the two reaching for a few sweets of his own. He may have refused to admit his part in the thievery, but he had no quarrel about partaking in the spoils. Sirius wouldn't admit it but his anxiety regarding Remus odd behavior had skyrocketed upon the sight of him and wasn't getting any better.

Stranger: Remus offered a small smile, and took the vial from the man. He twirled it in between his fingers, he uncorked it, and grimaced for a moment before he took it like a firewhiskey shot, closing his eyes tight and shuddering. "Oh, that's so gross."

Stranger: [brb!]

You: Sirius couldn't help but chuckle at the words. "I've caught you snogging Prevel Martin. I'm sure it can't be worse than that!" he countered making the group laugh, though his own didn't quite reach his eyes. They were still pinned to Remus, dark and calculating, as he tried to piece together the puzzle before him.

Stranger: "That was a dare!" he cried, elbowing him in the side. He could feel the effects of the potion almost instantly, though he was still full of his aches. He could feel how tired his eyes were, but the potion buzzed away inside of him and kept the open. His eyes flickered over and met Sirius's gaze, and he let out a puff of breath. "What, were you just upset it wasn't you?"

You: Sirius tensed in surprise at the sudden retort, forcing his grin wider to try and hide the blush. "Oh, yeah. I've always dreamed of snogging that ugly mug of yours," he teased. "Sounds more like a nightmare," Peter added around a mouth full of food. Sirius just laughed harder.

Stranger: Remus snorted softly and grabbed another pastry, kicking his boot out towards Peter playfully. "Aye, just you wait, bastards. Give me a year or two and I'll be taller than James."

You: "Pfft, not likely," Sirius scoffed playfully before turning towards James. "I'm suppose to be in transfiguration right now. Whats up? Or did you just want to bore us again with another one of your rants about Muggle studies again?"

Stranger: Remus scrunched his nose up and rolled his eyes, before he snuck another treat, eyes turning to James. "Yeah, what is it?" James looked affronted and scoffed. "What, a guy can't just ask his mates and-- his uh. non-mate." a glance to Lily. "To come and hang out and skip class?"

You: Sirius snorted at that. "Sure you can, but I think I rather be learning how to turn into a dragon than to have to stare at your ugly mug," he replied, sticking out his tongue. "You can't transfigure into a dragon," Peter commented absently reaching for another treat. "Says you! I bet I could turn into Norwegian Ridgeback by the end of the year if I wasn't skipping class!" he grinned, pointedly looking at James and knowing full well it wasn't the truth.

Stranger: Remus quirked a brow at him. "Actually, not possible. Not a dragon, at least," he nodded. He glanced towards James. "What was that thing we were reading last week? Animagus?" he questioned. "You can turn into an animal, but like. I think it has to be within a certain size."

You: "A baby dragon then," Sirius shrugged before James could answer. "Enough to breath fire and do some damage at least." "Yeah and probably shit everywhere," James laughed. "Good, another job for Finch and his cat," Sirius laughed.

You: *Filch

Stranger: Remus laughed, but it sounded distant even to himself. James looked over at the other lads and quirked a brow. "Shit aren't they covering Wolves and shit in Creatures today? What if you could turn into one of them?"

You: Sirius' smile faded a bit at the question. What was with all this talk about wolves? "I dunno, wolves are just vicious dogs right? I think I would rather be a regular one. Lounge about all day, get fat on treats, swarmed by women all the time." "Sniffing butts," James added with an arched brow. "Hey, don't knock it 'til you try it," Sirius countered.

Stranger: James laughed loudly. "But no, like, hear me out. You could scare the fuck out of any of your friends, if you like. Showed up at their house as a massive fucking wolf. Like would you shit yourself right there?"

You: "I dunno," Sirius continued. "I still think a dragon would be better. What do you think Remus?" he asked turning towards his best friend.

Stranger: Remus blinked a couple of times, and forced another laugh from himself. "Uh. Maybe a rabbit," he said lamely, clearing his throat. He ran a hand through his hair, and he suddenly did not feel very great at all, his stomach churning uneasily.

You: Sirius hesitated as he watched the color begin to drain from his friend's skin. "Don't rabbits mate like crazy?" he asked trying to hide his concern. "I always knew you had a promiscuous side," he teased. "Either way, it won't matter what we want to turn into if we don't learn how," he pointed out, pushing to his feet.

Stranger: The man cleared his throat, letting out a long breathe and tried to stop the queasy feeling. Almost as bad as the bone and joint aches, he hates the nausea that comes along with it, as the full moon ticked closer and closer. "James could probably find the book with the animagus spell in it." he murmured. "I uh. I have a ton of homework to do, and I have a feeling I'll...be falling asleep early tonight. I should get it done."

You: Sirius offered out a hand to help the other up. "Nah, I bet he's too distracted making eyes at Lily," Sirius teased, fluttering his lashes at the girl playfully. "Right, Lily?"

Stranger: Lily snapped out of her little world with James, a blush coming across her cheeks. "What? Oh, um--" she glanced over at James. "Nobody is making eyes at anyone."

You: "Ha! Right! Whatever you say, Lily," Sirius chuckled before making a kissing face towards them both. "You guys don't do anything I wouldn't do," he teased with a wink, "I think I'm gonna walk Remus to his next class before he collapses on himself."

Stranger: Lily rolled her eyes and flipped him off as well, something she had picked up from James no doubt. Remus glanced up as he was mentioned, and frowned. "I'm not gonna collapse. Wide awake, see?"

You: Sirius paid Remus no mind as he pulled him a long, calling over his shoulder. "James you're a bad influence on her!" he laughed just as they turned the corned and were suddenly on their own. Sirius let his smile fade now that they didn't have an audience though he didn't speak, unsure of what to say.

Stranger: Remus grumbled but sighed, following Sirius. He let him get pulled along, his bag swinging over his shoulder. When they were out of sight, the man glanced over his shoulder. "They're insane ,the lot of them.."

You: "Might as well include us in that lot as well, Remus," Sirius pointed out before shooting the man a side glance. "You're hiding something, aren't you?" he asked deciding that a blunt approach would be best.

Stranger: "I'm hardly insane." he puffed a breath out. "I'm the sanest one around." At the accusation, Remus stopped in his steps, and he frowned. "What would I be hiding."

You: Sirius turned to him, studying the bags under his eyes and his exhausted features. "That's what I would like to know," he countered, "You obvious haven't slept, you're moody, and you know enough about charms that if it were something as simple as a bad dream you would have taken care of it by now," Sirius pointed out, crossing his arms over his chest, "Exams aren't for a few months and-" he paused, realization striking, a devilish smile spreading across his lips. "You've been sneaking out, haven't you?! Who is she? Couldn't be a Gryffindor or you wouldn't be up all night... Is it that Hufflepuff girl I always see trailing after you? What was her name? Levy? Levi? Lindsye?" he pretended to stumbled over the girl in question, knowing full well her name was Lauraine, not wanting Remus to think that he pays far too much attention to him.

Stranger: Remus felt like he was going to throw up for real now. He sucked in a breath and rolled his eyes, pushing a hand through his hair. "Fuck man, maybe I just had a bad night sleep, okay?" he frowned. "I get -- insomnia sometimes. I don't like to take potions all the time because I don't think it's good for you ." he felt his face heat up at the insinuation that he was hooking up with a Hufflepuff, and he groaned, covering his face with his hands. "Sirius, shut the hell up. Please." he shook his head. "I'm not--I'm not sneaking out with some girl."

You: "Some guy then?" Sirius shrugged, his grin broadening to hide his sudden wave of jealousy. "Hey, I'm not one to judge, we're mates regardless of who you decide to shack up with." He moved to loop his arm around Remus' and start walking again. "No reason to get cranky about it."

Stranger: Remus let out a shaky breath. "I'm not shaking up with some guy, either," he groaned. "I'm--" he paused for a long moment, trying to come up with something on the spot. "I'm taking extra lessons with Gonny. At night, when everyone's asleep. Not a lot, just like. Every couple weeks. She's.. helping me learn some higher level charms and stuff."

You: "Oh," Sirius mumbled a bit put out, but far more relieved than anything. "Wait... why do you need to know higher charms? I mean, I get that you're talented and all, but that's a bit excessive and why would you keep that a secret?" he asked absently, brows furrowing as he attempted to work it all out.

Stranger: He shrugged. "She didn't want the other students getting jealous." He explained, frowning. "I just. Was curious, and thought about maybe going into a job with the Ministry with it, so." he cleared his throat. "And she likes that I'm a hard worker, so she was willing to teach me. If you want to join you can go ask her, but--"

You: "Brilliant! I could use some extra studies in Charms. If I'm gonna become an Aura I have to get Outstanding on the OWLS and I only got Exceeds, but I was talking to Peter earlier and they're letting him retake his. Maybe they'll let me retake mine!" Sirius chimed, beaming with excitement as he pulled away from his mate. "I'm going to see if I can speak to the Headmaster about the exams. Meet you in the common room after supper?" He called already hurrying down the corridor.

Stranger: Remus opened his mouth in surprise at Sirius's willingness to take up extra charms and transfiguration lessons, and he looked surprised. But before he could even make a rebuttal, Sirius was off. "Fuck," he groaned, and shook his head, trying to race to Minerva's office to go and tell him what he had done. Besides Dumbledore, she was the only person that knew what he was. He best go ask her if they could start up some random charms practice now and then.

You: [[Quick questions (srry just want to make sure I don't overstep): Do you have a preference on how you want this to go or do you just want to wing it? Are you wanting to do the scene with Minerva or Dumbledore or skip to that even? I figured with Sirius it could go two ways either they tell him yes but he didn't talk to the charms prof so he shows up just all like 'hi! ready to go to charms, mate?!' or he figures out somethings off and there is no extra charms and he confronts Remus about lying to him. ]]

Stranger: [[ooh lets maybe do the lying ]

Stranger: [and uh. lets skip the scenes with Dumbledore and minerva]

You: [[Ooo ^.^ yay I was hoping you'd go with the lying >:3 ]]

Stranger: <3]

You: Sirius managed to attend the rest of his classes though he seemed a bit stand offish whenever he caught sight of Remus or James and Peter for that matter. He didn't bother showing up for dinner either. In fact, it wasn't until they were to meet in the Gryffindor common room that he showed his face. His usual smile was absent, replaces by pursed lips as he studied Remus silently for a moment. It seemed as if the dark haired man wasn't going to speak at first, but eventually he let out a heavy sigh. "Charms, huh?" he asked evenly, a brow arching as he pinned Remus with a dark stare, waiting for his next excuse.

Stranger: brb!!]

Stranger: Remus wasn't able to find Mcgonogall all afternoon. In her study, in class -- He finally had to give up to try and find her. He needed to get some homework done. He finished out his classes and was immediately kept up in the common room the rest of the night, hurriedly scrawling away, watching the clock tick away. The moon would be at it's highest point by 9pm, which meant he needed to leave by 8pm to get himself hidden in the shrieking shack. He glanced up as he felt the gaze of someone on him, and he parted his lips. "I--um. What?" he asked weakly. He only had twenty minutes before he had to leave.

You: "Don't play dumb Remus, its not a good look on you," Sirius grumbled, crossing his arms. "You lied to me! We're suppose to be best mates! Best mates don't lie to one another!" he snapped, losing a bit of his temper.

Stranger: Remus snapped his mouth close and let out a shaky breath. "I--" he stammered, and made another glance at the clock. "You're right." he nodded quickly. "I'm. seeing that Hufflepuff girl. Lauraine." he said quickly. "I didn't want to get the same shit that James gets for Lily because she's.. shy."

You: "Bullshit," Sirius snapped without hesitation. "You know the only reason I give James hell about Lily is because Lily is just as much a mate as he is. You are also a horrible liar..." he hesitated, something similar to pain crossing his features. "or at least I thought you were. Whatever you're hiding Remus... I hope its worth it," he spat, his anger returning full force as he gave the other boy a shove.

Stranger: Remus really didn't have the energy in him so close to the moon. When Sirius shoved him, he knocked back hard into the corner of the table, letting out a little yelp. "Maybe just mind your own business," he huffed out through a grimace. "If I wanted you to know, then I'd tell you."

You: "Last I checked, you are my business!" Sirius growled, kicking the chair between them out of the way. "At least, if we're best mates, it is... but then again, apparently... we're not," he added his voice lowering once more. "My mistake."

You: [[brb]]

Stranger: [nw]

Stranger: Remus backed away from the man, moving to start shoving his papers and books back into his bag. "I don't have to tell you everything about me, Sirius. Just. Drop it, okay?" he huffed out a long breath, swinging his bag over his shoulder. "I have to go."

Stranger: brb]

You: "No, of course, not! Why would you?!" Sirius snapped at him. "Go then! I'm not stopping you! It's not like I could even if I tried, obviously! Just don't expect me to come looking for you when you're late for class in the morning... or when you need another potion! I would hate to assume you needed me for anything."

Stranger: Remus felt a hard shudder run through his body, and he doubled over briefly. He glanced at the clock and puffed a breath. Why was he-- the moon didn't finish for another hour, at least. It dawned on him, there, that he forgot to account for the time change. He made a noise in his throat, hands shaking. "I'm--I'm sorry, I have to go." he said, and bolted from the common room.

You: Sirius' hesitated as he watched Remus falter, his anger and hurt forgotten. "Remus!" he jerked forward, intent on giving the man a hand but he was already bolting down the corridor leading towards the stairs. "Remus!" Sirius called after him, a spike of worry joining the concoction of emotions swirling inside him. He paused for a breath... another... before he realized what he was doing he was half way down the stairs, barely managing to keep the other boy in his sights.

Stranger: Remus was shaking, feeling his breath coming out hard, his bones aching inside of his skin. He had to pause, once, as another hard shudder rippled through him, before he was staggering towards the hidden passage behind the statue. He heard Sirius calling behind him, and just hoped he could keep out of his eye sight. Sirius couldn't be there for him, it was too dangerous.

You: "Remus wait!" Sirius called again, the words coming out breathless as he hurried down the stairs, catching a glimpse of the other boy just as he ducked behind one of the statues. Sirius didn't hesitate to follow, blindly following at this point. Whatever Remus was hiding was more than just some silly secret between friends that much was obvious now. But whatever it /was/, judging by the shaking and cries coming from the other boy was painful and possibly dangerous. Sirius had heard of some slytherins selling gillyweed and waking death to other students for kicks but... he had never pinned Remus as one to partake in something so dangerous. Now, however, he couldn't be so sure.

Stranger: Remus could feel the blood rushing in his ears, drowning out all other sounds. He made it to the statue, ducking behind it and entering the hidden passage. It was mostly dirt, dug through what had to be centuries ago, making his way under Hogwarts and towards the shrieking shack. He just needed to get there, then he could -- he could let the shift finish. A strained whimper came from his throat, seeing the door in sight. He reached to yank it open, clambering out. He fell to his hands and knees onto the old, rotting, wooden floor of the shack, gasping for air. He could feel the howl starting to catch in his throat.

You: Sirius slid to a stop in front of the small tunnel, heart sinking. He hated tight spaces... They were worse than boggarts... He shifted from one foot to another before he managed enough courage to dive in, doing his best to focus on the way Lupin had sounded, the way he had shivered. His friend needed him whether he knew it or not and Sirius was sure as hell going to- A howl broke through the sound of his trembling breaths making him pause, glancing up at the small bit of moonlight at the end of the tunnel. Remus wasn't alone! Something was there! He had to get to him! "Remus!!!!" He called desperately, doubling his efforts as he crawled through the tight space. "Remus! I'm coming!"

Stranger: [agsjldf sorry im helping boyfriend w/ dinner so lots of back and forth. we can always move to email or discord if its easier. brb]

You: [[No worries! I gotta get my son to bed anyways. Discord is still working for me but I would love to continue via email when we have to cut off if that's cool. I would hate to lose ya. Good Rp partners are so hard to come by.]]

Stranger has disconnected.

[geewithluv]

namjoon ♛ meeting her parents

Ｐａｉｒｉｎｇ： Kim Namjoon X Fem!OC Joanna

Ｇｅｎｒｅ：v mild angst but it has a happy/resolved ending

Ｗａｒｎｉｎｇｓ：nothing explicit or graphic. mentions of drug addiction and prostitution, parents that shouldn’t be parents.

Ｒａｔｉｎｇ：PG-13

Ｗｏｒｄ Ｃｏｕｎｔ：1.5k

Ａ／Ｎ： «this belongs in my headcanon universe and you can read the other parts in the masterlist, the description of the characters is [here] so you get a summary of who they are. »

ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ

Joanna’s relationship with her parents was confusing. She wasn’t sure she knew where she stood with them which made it hard to explain to anyone else. They talked, she even saw them occasionally, but it was far from perfect. There’d be periods of time when every phone call ended with tears or yelling and then they’d be back to “normal” and she’d go visit them for lunch.

 It wasn’t that she purposefully didn’t introduce them to Namjoon, but with every day being a mystery as to her parents’ mood it wasn’t easy to schedule a time. Namjoon had met her siblings though and got along with her older brother, Tyler, really well and Tyler even met the rest of the guys and exchanged numbers with them. Her other brother, Cam, was just a child so there wasn’t a friendship there but Namjoon had met the boy who was always excited to see him no matter if it was in person or on TV. Luckily, no one thought the child was serious when he said, “That’s my brother!” and pointed to billboards and posters of Namjoon. 

 Tyler was fairly older than Joanna, 10 years to be exact and given the weird circumstances with their parents, he pretty much raised Joanna and was a bit easier to talk to regarding the situation with their parents since he wasn’t really bothered by it. One day, Namjoon asked Tyler while they were drinking and watching sports.

“It was worse before Joanna was born so she doesn’t know half the bad things I remember happening,” Tyler sighed, he was sure this conversation was going to happen eventually, “when she got old enough to question things I pretty much decided to take over. She was like 5 and I just started sophomore year. Our father was always passed out on the couch either from drinking or shooting up and our mother was too busy selling her body to come home. When I turned 18, I moved out and took Joanna with me.”

 “That’s really admirable.” Namjoon praised Tyler who scoffed in response. 

 “It’s the rational thing to do. Besides, it was either with me or foster care since the school started calling the authorities. I guess that woke them up enough to get their shit together because by the time Joanna was 12, they started coming around more to see us. I didn’t really care, ya know? But she was excited, so I let them in.”

 “Are they still…” Namjoon couldn’t find the right word.

 “Clean?” Tyler suggested, sensing Namjoon trying to tread carefully around what for most people is a sensitive topic. “Nah, not really at least. 6 months here and there for each of them, maybe more. I stopped caring over a decade ago, but Joanna keeps trying to stay in touch, she’s too damn forgiving. I’m about to get custody of Cam so hopefully, that’ll stop her. I don’t even know why they decided to have another kid, they’re so irresponsible. I’m just happy he has no birth defects.”

 “Yeah.” Namjoon agreed as he let the words process and unable to think of anything substantial. 

 “Sounds harsh, but if we’re lucky one of them will either go to jail or die before more harm is done.” Tyler finished his beer before standing up. “Want another?”

 --

 “One dinner can’t be so bad.” Namjoon heard Joanna talking to someone as he finished up his shower. Shirtless with a pair of joggers hanging loose around his waist, Namjoon walks into the kitchen where Joanna is cooking and her brothers sit at the table.

 “We’ve been through this a million times,” Tyler sighed, about to speak before Cam noticed Namjoon.

 “Joonie!” The boy squealed with excitement, hopping down from Tyler’s lap to run over to Namjoon.

 “Hey, sorry to come on such short notice. Cam really wanted pancakes and he says I don’t make them how he likes.” Tyler stood up from the table. Cam confirmed this with an enthusiastic nod.

 “You guys are welcome anytime, I told you that.” Namjoon bounced Cam on his hip as he walked back over to the kitchen.

 “You’re not busy today right, babe?” Joanna asked her boyfriend as she set the table.

 “I shouldn’t be. Why?”

 “Joey…” Tyler said, his tone almost threatening but Joanna didn’t react.

 “Mom and Dad want to have a get-together tonight and I want you to be there.” Joanna sits as she finishes filling the plates with fluffy pancakes.

 “I don’t know why.” Tyler rolled his eyes.

 “If you want me there, then sure.” Namjoon shrugged, not knowing how to avoid the obvious tension. Joanna looked over at her older brother with an eyebrow raised as if to say, ‘I told you so’.

 “We go too?” Cam spoke up, his face somehow already sticky from maple syrup and Joanna was sure some was in his dark curls.

 “Yeah, yeah, we’ll go too.” Tyler gave in.

 --

 It was a quiet dinner. It was unnerving to Namjoon who could never remember a “family dinner” being so silent yet still feeling so loud. 

 “You two make such a wonderful couple.” The mother, whose name Namjoon didn’t catch, said fondly. “You guys remind me of your father and I when we were young.” Joanna tenses at the comparison but mutters thanks just to be polite.

 “Why would you say such an offensive thing to them?” Tyler set his fork down loudly.

 “It’s fine.” Joanna said softly, hoping to calm things before it got worse. Namjoon knew how hard she worked cooking and cleaning to appease her parents and his heart clenched knowing it was all going to come crashing down as Tyler had predicted an hour prior.

 “You know, you’ve always got something to say, don’t you?” The father said. “We’re trying to have a nice dinner for once and--”

 “For once? I’m 33 and we’re still trying to have a nice dinner? Give it up, will you?” Tyler stood up and instantly Joanna scooped Cam into her arms and motioned to Namjoon to grab Cam’s plate of food and follow her while her parents and older brother started shouting at each other. Namjoon hadn’t realized how thick the walls were in their apartment until the noise was almost completely silenced once the door closed to their bedroom. 

 “Stay right here and finish your food, okay?” Joanna told Cam as she turned on the TV to some kids show Namjoon didn’t recognize. “While I talk to Joonie.”

 “Does this happen every time?” Namjoon asked as the couple walked into the bathroom. Joanna nodded; he could tell she was holding back tears.

 “I gotta go calm it down. I’ll be right back, watch Cam.” 

 “I’m not letting you go down there alone.” Namjoon looked bewildered that she would even think that was an option. “We’re a team, you’re not going into chaos alone.” He said and opened the second door leading to the hallway. The three were still screaming and Namjoon could tell at least one plate had been smashed.

 “That’s enough!” Joanna yelled, walking toward them.

 “You don’t want your precious idol boyfriend to see what we’re really like, huh?” Her father glared. “Why’s he even here? He’d probably lose his job if I gave him a black eye for not minding his damn busine--”

 “Her ‘precious idol boyfriend’ is kicking you out,” Namjoon spoke from behind her, surprising Joanna and Tyler even took a step back, “That’s enough yelling, you’ve well overstayed your welcome, so, I suggest you leave before I have you thrown out of the building.”

 Tyler apologized once the elders left, he stayed long enough to help clean up and get Cam tired enough to sleep through the car ride back.

 “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He told his sister, kissing her cheek. “Take care of her.” He said to Namjoon before leaving with the toddler in his arms. Namjoon thought it was a weird statement to make but he soon understood why.

  3 hours later Joanna sat against the headboard of the bed with her knees to her chest. Namjoon walked in, flicking the light to the bathroom off. “You ready for bed, love?” He asked, sitting next to her. 

 Joanna looks over at him, eyes watery with tears she’d been holding back for hours. Namjoon was honestly surprised she managed to take her makeup off and put her thick curls up without bursting into tears when the rubber bands didn’t cooperate and snapped. “Promise me we’ll never be like them?” She asked meekly.

 “I promise.” He pulled her into his chest, feeling her body shake lightly as she cried, finally letting the tears flow. “I promise, I promise, I promise.” He repeated, kissing the top of her head.

It wasn’t the last dinner they had with her parents, each going wrong in different ways and every time it ended with him practically rocking Joanna to sleep. He never got upset when she tried, again and again, to make it work but he wished she wasn’t, as Tyler said, too damn forgiving.

FIN. So far I’ve finished all but Jungkook’s and I have to edit Jimin and Tae’s. No horrible families in those three, I promise!

[dxuble-bubble-disco-quexn]

euphoria | b. urie

where brendon goddamn urie is charlie price, and you’re just the lowly costume designer… or so you thought.

brendon urie x reader

(kinky boots era)

word count : 2.8k

warnings : a rushed-as-hell ending because i didn’t know how to finish it and had zero ideas, i’m sorry

notes : i did really try to make this gender neutral, so if i added any fem/masc pronouns or anything like that, please point them out to me! and to get into the theatre mood, i’ve been listening to hamilton non-stop. (see what i did there-)

{ ! }

“how’s it going there, urie?” you asked nonchalantly, leaning in the doorway of brendon’s dressing room. he was clearly struggling with the laces on the left boot, but knowing him, he would have insisted that he could do it himself until he had to walk out to a crowd of hundreds with one boot and a slipper on. suffice it to say, he was a stubborn bastard.

“all good.” brendon grinned wryly, glancing down at the offending footwear. you arched an eyebrow, and after a moment, he crumbled. “okay, fine,” he amended. “maybe it’s not ‘all good’.” you laughed, mentioning that it was pretty clear before entering the room.

"it's, um, yeah." he said helplessly, motioning at the shoe. you snorted and bent down, lacing up the boot with ease. you had designed it, after all. "thanks," brendon said, grinning at you. you brushed off the praise, merely stating that it was your job, after all.

“also, hey, good luck out there tonight! final show, must be pretty bittersweet, hm?” he laughed as though that was a great understatement. in all fairness, however, it probably was. brendon was extremely charismatic, as expected, and made friends within the cast almost immediately. having to leave them all behind in a week to go back to los angeles? that had to be tough.

“i’ll definitely miss you guys, yeah. you’re lucky that you’ll get to stay with them.” you shot him an inquisitive look and he paused. “what?”

“i’m not staying with the cast. i mean, god, i wish i could, but i’ll be moving on just like you will.” did you just imagine it, or did his face fall for a split second before lifting back up to its normal, playful grin? you shook your head slightly. of course not, you were just overtired,

“well shit, that’s a shame.” brendon said, you glanced up at him in mild bewilderment. “don’t look so surprised, y/n,” he chuckled. “believe it or not, you’re good company.”

a stagehand passed by the door to inform you both that there was 20 minutes until the curtains opened. brendon paled the smallest bit, and you noticed, setting a gentle hand on his arm. “don’t worry,” you reassured. “they’ll love you. and if they don’t, make them.”

brendon snorted. “that almost sounds like a threat.” he pointed out. you shrugged noncommittally and shooed him out the door of his dressing room, reminding him that there was only 15 minutes left and he better go out and kick some metaphorical theatre ass.

{ ! }

he did great. the whole cast did great. everyone did so great and you were doing the nearly impossible task of fighting back tears as you congratulated them all backstage. you had hoped that you were putting on a good mask of joyful pride, but charlie goddamn price just had to see through that one too.

he discreetly gave your hand a little squeeze and you were cursing yourself for the rising blush you could feel high in your cheeks. you were a grown adult, not some silly high schooler holding hands with a crush. wait. did you just compare brendon to a crush? that was completely metaphorical and suddenly brendon’s face was right in front of yours and it would be so easy to kiss him right now and what the actual fuck was happening to your brain.

“hey, um, y/n? you alright?” he asked dubiously. you nod quickly, shaking your head to shoo the obnoxious thoughts away that immediately came back when you looked brendon in the eye, curse his gorgeous face. at the moment all you wanted to do was find the tallest set piece and hurl yourself off of it.

“sorry. you kinda disappeared on me.” he said. you mumbled your apologies and made some lame excuse that you had to go to the bathroom or something. you didn’t really hear yourself, just knowing that you had to get away from all the people and all the noise and, well, brendon.

gasping for air, you made your way to the back parking lot. the cool night air felt fantastic filling up your lungs and pressing against your burning skin. alright. time to take a mental inventory - how did you currently feel? like you desperately wanted to implode. valid. why were you feeling this way? brendon urie was a charismatic, humorous, attractive-as-hell guy and you don’t know how to deal with basic human emotions.

oddly enough, your weird coping mechanisms helped you tremendously, and you were already prepared to go back in there and face your...fears? anxieties? whatever the hell this was.

“y/n!” you hesitated, but luckily it wasn’t brendon - it was ryan, one of the main stagehands in the production. “what’s up? shouldn’t you be at the tear fest, eye-fucking urie like everyone else?” despite his words, you knew ryan felt no envy towards brendon. it was well known that brendon didn’t particularly enjoy the constant eyefucking that just about everyone from the ages of 14-80 gave him on a daily basis. in fact, he liked to joke about it quite a bit.

“screw off, jerk.” you pouted playfully, rolling your eyes skyward as you continued on to the backstage. someone called out to ryan and he bid you farewell, but not before throwing a few playfully sarcastic comments your way.

you and ryan had discovered that you had both gone to the same college just a day after meeting each other, and you had grown quite close bonding over your hatred of a certain hag of a history professor.

you grabbed a glass of wine from the table where they were being served. it wasn’t the afterparty quite yet, no. but this was more pre-gaming in a sense.

you downed half of the glass in one drink and sighed, finally reaching the main bustle of the group. scanning the crowd quickly, you noticed that brendon was off talking to a few members of the ensemble, and didn't seem to be looking for you. that was a relief, but not surprising. you knew that he respected boundaries, and this would be no different.

"hey, y/nnnnn" someone called. you looked around, finding one of your best friends from the cast, jennie, looking back at you with large eyes. "hi,” she said breathlessly. “so like, the entire ensemble is going out for drinks tonight and becks said that you should come too and like everyone agreed with her so like come on!” you paused for a moment, processing her words. jennie had a tendency to do that - talk extremely fast in one breath - when she got excited. you knew there was no point in denying her request, because fuck it, you wanted a drink and who better to do it than with twenty or so grown-up theatre kids?

“why the hell not,” you laughed, “i’ll be right back. gotta grab my bag, meet you right here.” she nodded and you set off to find it. about five minutes later, (the bag evidently did not want to be found, as it had hurled itself off to the darkest corner of the set room), and you were carpooling to the bar with jennie, becks, and a guy who introduced himself as scott.

“so. what’s going on with you and urie?” jennie asked casually, leaning against the driver's seat. you stiffened noticeably.

“what are you talking about?” you retorted with much more bite than intended. jennie however merely raised her eyebrows in amusement.

“don’t even play that with me,” she tutted. “the tension between you two is freaking palpable. don’t even.” you blushed and mumbled something incoherent into the headrest in front of you. “hm?”

“what- what about you and that stagehand? eva?” jennie rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“i asked her out two days ago, she said yes. now don’t change the subject.” you blinked. alright then, you thought. some form of god seemed to be looking down on you that day, as the car pulled into the parking lot of the bar and you jumped out. it was painfully obvious that you were avoiding that topic, but it was far better than talking about it.

you, jennie, becks and scott joined the rest of the ensemble as you raced into the bar like children at an amusement park. there was a good possibility that this experience would end horribly, but in the moment, you were completely up to take that chance.

{ ! }

you flopped onto the bed of your hotel room and sighed. the bedside clock read three am, and you were utterly exhausted. feeling like a total zombie, you dragged yourself off of the soft embrace of your mattress to brush your teeth and change clothes. plugging your phone into the charger, you noticed that you had a text from none other than brendon, sent earlier that night.

“hey, y/n, it’s brendon. i hope you’re okay, i didn’t really see you after you left. but i was wondering if it was cool with you if we could meet tomorrow? i’ll send you the address of the place i was thinking. but i just wanted to ask you a few things about the boots. if you’re busy, don’t worry! it’s fine x - b”

you stared at the message for a moment before taking it in. your sleep deprived brain didn’t react as you normally would - you just sort of mentally shrugged. but you did reply.

“hi, brendon! sure, that sounds good. meet you around 11?” you mentally high-fived yourself for coming up with a reply that looked like it was written by someone not on the verge of dropping their phone on their face and falling the fuck asleep.

and then you did just that.

{ ! }

when you awoke due to the blaring sound of the alarm that you must have set before falling asleep (even though you didn’t remember setting it at all), it was already ten am. cursing softly, you rolled out of bed, straight into a hot shower. you were never one to take hours readying yourself, but you were pretty sure it was record timing as you walked out of your hotel, hair straightened with a full face of makeup on.

it was hardly a ten minute walk to the café - one that seemed even shorter as you were lost in your own thoughts. in fact, you almost walked straight past the unassuming little corner shop on accident.

the small bell next to the door rang softly as you entered. the single room of the café was gorgeous - it was on the smaller side, but the windows and natural light made it look giant yet inviting. you liked this place already.

“hello!” greeted the barista cheerfully, “what can i get for you today?” you placed your order and sat down at one of the raised seats near the front facing window, watching the slow-moving traffic. the barista called your name, and you soon sat back down, drink in hand. you were just about to immerse yourself in your phone when brendon walked in. he smiled over at you, went to place his order, and sat down across the table,

“so, what’s up?” you said, stifling a yawn. brendon chuckled.

“not quite awake yet?” he teased. you scoffed, similarly to jennie the night before.

“don’t avoid the question,” you laughed. “no offense, but why are we here?” he shrugged, suddenly dawning a shy demeanor of that you had never seen him wear. the confident, charismatic brendon urie - shy? surprisingly enough, you could see it. “why do i feel like you lured me here under the false pretenses of talking about my job?” you asked, narrowing your eyes jokingly.

“okay, fine,” he conceded. “maybe i just wanted to talk to you.”

“you know, i would have gladly accepted your invitation even if you did just want to meet up and talk.” you pointed out. brendon flushed and shrugged. “anyway, now that we’re both here, where did you find this place?” that question seemed to spiral into an endless conversation of which you were not complaining. brendon very quickly regained his confidence as the two of you began discussing mutual friends, activities you both enjoyed, and a plethora of other topics as well. you felt like you could talk to him forever.

occasionally the two of you would head up to the counter together to get new drinks, only stopping to place your orders and thank the barista who, by the sly smile on her face, almost definitely thought that you and brendon were a Thing™.

by the time you checked your phone, it was three pm. “four hours,” you said to him in awe as you walked back to his hotel room. (you had blindy agreed to head back there as you had left the coffee shop)

“sure as hell didn’t seem like four hours,” brendon chuckled. you mumbled your agreement beside him as the two of you entered the lobby of the hotel brendon was staying at, coincidentally only a few minutes walk from yours.

the elevator ride was quick and comfortably quiet, as was the walk up to his room. unsurprisingly, it was a bit nicer than yours, but you didn’t mind. it wasn’t like you spent much time in your room those days, anyway.

“dude, you’re hotel room is sweet.” you exclaimed, flopping onto the sofa that faced the window overlooking the new york skyline. brendon blushed faintly and chuckled. you raised an eyebrow at him, but refrained from saying anything.

“want anything to drink? wine, beer, water, we have it all.” he said, walking into the kitchen. you shrugged, saying that water was fine. your attention was stolen by the view from the window, where the glass panes of a nearby skyscraper were glinting rainbow in the sunlight.

“hello?” brendon laughed, setting a water bottle on the table in front of you and sitting down. you blinked and looked over at him.

“sorry about that,” you blushed, “the view is gorgeous here.” brendon agreed quietly and the two of you sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes. finally, you broke it.

“what are you going to do next? another album?” you asked. brendon shrugged, sipping his beer.

“maybe, i don’t know. i’ve been thinking of a few songs, but not a whole albums-worth.” you nodded, murmuring your understanding.

“don’t worry! i get that, and-” you cut yourself off. “you have a balcony?!” you gasped in excitement. brendon laughed and nodded, making a motion for you to lead the way, seeing as you had already jumped off of the couch.

the view from the balcony was indescribable. what with the gentle wind from being up so high, it felt like you were at the literal top of the world. even the skyscrapers seemed to shrink below you, and the clouds seemed just too far away to touch. it was euphoric.

“sorry for acting like a child,” you said nervously, not tearing your eyes away from the soaring view of the city spread out below. “i just- i’ve always loved views like this. they’re so…” you trailed off, not able to describe the feeling. brendon made a soft sound of understanding beside you.

“don’t worry, y/n,” he grinned. “excitement looks cute on you.” did he just…? no, you thought. he couldn’t be flirting with you. but as your brain went into over-analysis mode, a thought popped into your head. he was totally flirting with me. that smooth motherfucker. brendon had stayed comfortably silent throughout this whole realization, and you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of watching you mentally fall apart before him. though, it was either that or act like you possessed the iq of a plastic houseplant, and neither of those options sounded particularly desirable.

“and everything looks cute on you, urie.” fuck, that slipped out. guess we’ll see what he does with that. he certainly looked taken aback, but regained his composure quickly. that’s right, two can play at this game.

however, the “game” did not last as long as you had previously assumed. brendon made sure of that.

“you’re making it really hard not to kiss you, y/n.” he grumbled. your stomach did a little flip at his words, and your eyes widened. you didn’t even attempt to mask your surprise this time.

“personally, i recommend that you do it then,” you smirked. brendon blinked, and before either of your realized it, your lips were on his.

with the wind blowing around the two of you, and the entirety of new york city sprawled out below as your lips moved in sync, you formed a single coherent thought. this is it, you sighed in contentment. this is euphoria.