#LISTEN THERE IS POTENTIAL HERE I JUST NEED YALL TO HEAR ME OUT

[bettathanyou]

Hey Sofia the first fans would you like to see cute (age appropriate) ship stuff between James and Ruby

[flemingsfreckles]

Replacement Pt.12

Read the rest of the series here!

Warnings: just some pg13 making out, nothing else.

WC: 3.3k

A/N: hi, I finally got this chapter finished, it’s been a struggle, like I’ve said I’ve been incredibly busy, I’m hoping to get some short blurbs written for yall so I can get back to consistently posting.

You didn’t hear much from Jessie the next day. A few texts here and there, but nothing like you were used to. You acknowledged each other at training, uncomfortable glances in each other's direction, followed by quick, training related conversations.

You hated it. Feeling like you had messed up, that you were to blame. You had spent the night feeling angry, at Jessie and at yourself. Her words had hurt, the way she nearly dismissed what you had seen as valuable. You loved the safety you felt when it was just the two of you in her apartment. You loved how it felt to finally feel comfortable exploring this side of your life. You loved being able to touch her, hold her hand, kiss her and not feel scared. You loved being able to open talk, no teammates or strangers potentially listening in. You figured she had felt the same, until she had called it all fake.

At the same time you were mad at her, you were mad at yourself. You knew it wasn’t fair to force Jessie into dates at home. She deserved someone who wanted to show her off, someone who was proud to be her girlfriend and showed it. You hadn’t given that to her. The longer you sat in bed thinking, the more you felt torn. You didn’t want to lose her, but you weren’t ready for everyone to know, at least not yet.

“Can I pick you up tonight? 9pm? I’ll have you home by midnight I promise.” Those were the first words you spoke to Jessie this morning that weren’t related to soccer. You had waited around in the locker room after training until all your teammates had left and just the two of you sat side by side in your cubbies.

“Kinda late don’t you think?” She questions quietly.

“Please?” You didn’t want to have to beg her, but you needed to talk, you needed this chance with her.

“Okay, sure.”

“Okay, I’ll pick you up.” You say to her as she heads out of the locker room. A little hurt that she hadn’t waited to walk out with you, but you also couldn’t blame her too much. This morning had been tense and awkward, it was fair for her to run off.

“You’re not going to kill me up here are you?” Jessie tries to break the silence in the car. You just glance at her. “Sorry, obviously a joke.”

You and Jessie had been driving for about 25 minutes before you parked the car. You had traveled out of the city of Portland, into the woods, down a gravel road, to a small clearing you found last year. Away from the hussle and bussle of the city, it became a quiet place for you to think. It probably wasn’t at all what she was expecting, but you didn’t mind surprising her.

“9pm picnic?” Jessie says, puzzled look on her face as she followed you out of the car and watched you lay out the blanket you had brought.

“No, stargazing.” You point upward to the clear sky displaying tiny bright dots of light.

“Oh.” Jessie makes her way to the blanket, toeing off her shoes before sitting down. You follow, sitting beside her. Just like the car, the two of you start off in silence, waiting for the other to break it.

“Look, Jessie.” You start, waiting for her to turn to look at you, when her eyes meet yours you continue. “I know this isn’t completely public, but I’m trying. You asked to do something outside of our houses, this is what I’m comfortable with for now. I wanted to show you, I’m in this, I want this.”

“I know, I’m really sorry, for what I said, I should have never said those dates were fake, because they weren’t. Those evenings together meant something to me and they meant something to you. They weren’t fake and I’m so sorry I said they were. I’m in this too, I want this too. I just freaked out, thinking you’d keep me a secret forever, which now that I’ve reflected was stupid and I just panicked.”

“It was never my intention to keep you a secret forever. I just need a little bit more time. I’m still figuring this out.”

“Yeah, I know. You deserve to take the time you need, I’m sorry if I made you feel pressured in any way.” Her hand on your thigh gives you a gentle squeeze, sending tiny feelings of electricity up between your legs.

You respond with silence, not quite knowing where to take the conversation, but also just falling into a comfortable silence with the girl next to you. As you both lay, you lean your head over, resting it on her shoulder. The two of you lay in silence, admiring the display in the sky above you.

“This has been really nice.” Jessie says rolling over on her side to look at you. You keep your eyes trained on the sky, looking at the stars. “Thank you for showing me this.” She puts a kiss on your cheek before shifting to lay her head on your chest, one of her arms coming to wrap around your waist.

You feel your face rush with heat at the feeling of her kiss. You couldn’t believe something simple from her, like a peck on the cheek still gave you a tingling feeling in your stomach. “You know it’s been three months technically since our first date, and one month since we agreed to be girlfriends?”

“I did.” Jessie lets out a little sigh. “I just wasn’t sure if you wanted to make it a big deal or not, people are different, we hadn’t really done anything for month one or two, so I wasn’t sure if you maybe weren’t a monthly anniversary person or not.

“I wasn’t sure if you were, that’s why I haven’t been saying anything.”

“So we’ve just been not acknowledging it.” Jessie laughs softly as she speaks.

“Yeah I guess.” You shrug.

You feel Jessie shift on the blanket, she lifts her head momentarily.“I’ve had a really nice three months with you.”

“Me too babe.” You both share a smile before Jessie leans up toward you, her lips finding yours.

As you kiss you can almost feel a shift. One you can’t quite place but the way she kissed you, felt deeper, more passionate, her tongue running against yours felt dirtier, in a way that made you want more. Before you can get too carried away you find yourself pulling back. You wanted it, but not on a blanket, on a rock, in the middle of somewhat secluded woods.

“Um, so it’s almost eleven, I promised I’d have you home by midnight.”

“Right…” Jessie says. “I mean, we do have film and recovery tomorrow. Should probably get at least some sleep.” Both of you groan as you stand up, not wanting to leave the peaceful night you had created, but you knew you had to.

After the short drive home you found yourself parking your car outside of your own place, instead of Jessie’s. “Sorry, I’ll drop you off in a second, I forgot something for you, I meant to grab it earlier.”

“Of course, no problem.”

“Unless you wanted to come upstairs?” It was an innocent enough question you posed to Jessie, but both of you knew it likely had a less than innocent underlying meaning.

You had been more physical on your date tonight than most. Your hands had constantly been finding ways to touch Jessie. Your hand in hers, your hand on her thigh, hand on her back, your fingers running through her hair, and she was returning the favor, her hands running down your side as she had rested with her head on your chest.

“Yeah, if you want me to?”

“I do.” You nodded. “Plus, tomorrow is just film and recovery, if we’re a little sleepy, it’ll be alright.” You end the sentence with a slight smirk on your face. The two of you made quick work of getting out of your car and she followed you up to your building.

You initiated it. The second the two of you made it through the door, your lips found Jessie’s, kissing her hard, not wasting any time before you let your tongue slide against her lips. Hands on her hips you urge her to move backward in the direction of your bedroom.

You poured years of self hatred and denial into the kiss, you were finally getting what you had always wanted deep down. The feelings you had suppressed for years poured out as the two of you made your way into the bedroom.

You reach the bed, finally breaking your kiss and you climb onto it as Jessie stands at the side, watching you. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Not having to think twice you reassure her with an enthusiastic nod, it felt right, tonight was the night. You had no idea what you were doing, but excitement filled your stomach.

“Okay, just tell me if you change your mind.” Jessie says as she climbs onto the bed next to you, situating herself between your thighs.

Leaning down, she covers your body with her own, her lips making their way back to yours and the two of you spend time kissing. You slowly become used to the feeling of her body on yours, it's new, but you liked it, your hands hold her sides as her own hold her above you. Every slight shift of her weight you can feel, the longer you kiss her the more restless you become. You can feel the way her hips softly rock against yours. For a moment you’re in heaven.

You can feel your head start to spin as she kisses the side of your neck. The feeling you're experiencing is one you’re unable to put into words, a mix of uncertainty and excitement fill your system. Feeling bold in your movements you let your hands pick at the edges of Jessie’s shirt, your fingers just barely touching her bare skin underneath. She sits back, breaking away her lips from your skin and you watch as she puts her arms up.

“Go ahead.” She nods with a smile down to you and you slowly pull the shirt up and over her head. You let your eyes trail down her body, pausing a little too long at her chest, still covered in a sports bra. It was a view you had seen hundreds of times in the locker room but this was different. This wasn’t seeing her change into her kit for a game, this wasn’t her changing after practice. She was undressing for you. That made it different.

You’re enjoying the attention she’s giving to your neck and lips, until her hands find their way to the hem of your shirt and you feel her begin to gently pull on it. She doesn’t quite make a move to take it off of you yet, but you know that’s what she’s teasing at, her fingers creeping further under your shirt. That’s when your stomach feels like a sinking rock, it finally sets in what the two of you were doing. She was going to be naked, you were going to be naked. She’d be seeing every inch of you. You hadn’t done anything like this before, before Jessie you’d hardly made out with anyone.

As her fingertips graze the band of your bra the feeling in your stomach grows and for a moment you’re worried you’ll be sick. “Hang on Jess.” You’re able to whisper out and you almost regret it as you feel her lips pull away from your sensitive skin.

“Are you okay?” Jessie pulls back looking at your face, her fingers still touching under your shirt.

“Uh.” You try to find your voice, the words to tell her. Feeling frozen you just look at her. When she moves her fingers slightly you jump under her touch. Jessie now looks concerned as she looks down at you. You feel like you could cry in the moment, the lump in your throat starting to feel impossible to swallow.

“We can stop.” Jessie offers sweetly.

“No Jess, it's fine.” You quickly find the words trying to convince her and yourself that you’re okay. “I’m fine.”

“I don’t think you mean that.” Jessie stays still, her hands still resting on either side of your abdomen, you hope she can’t feel how uneven your breathing is, or just how hard your heart is beating. “I can tell you’re nervous, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

You shouldn’t be embarrassed, but you were. Tucking your head down to avoid her eyes, you can feel them burning into the crown of your head. The heat rising on your cheeks makes this feel even more embarrassing. “I’ve just, I’ve never, and I don’t, I mean, I’m just not sure.” You manage to mumble out.

Jessie doesn’t say anything initially, but you feel her fingers slide out from under your shirt, resting on your thighs that were still wrapped around her waist. “Hey, it’s okay.” She begins rubbing slow strokes up and down your shorts, comforting you. Her right hand leaves your thigh and finds your own hand, gently interlacing your fingers.

“I’m sorry.” Your voice cracks slightly and you can feel the tears welling up, blinking hard a couple escape and roll down your cheek. “I thought I was ready.”

“It’s okay, look at me.” Jessie politely requests. You turn your head, giving her a quick glance before shying away again. “Please,” it’s a gentle ask and you do as she says, making eye contact with her for just a moment before your eyes fall to your lap again, “I don't care, I mean, I do obviously, I care about you. I just mean, if you’re ever not ready, not comfortable, we’re not going to do anything.”

“I want to, I promise, I want to have sex with you, just, I don’t know, it’s still all new.” You couldn’t quite put into words the feelings you were having, uneasy, anxious, and yet excited, all flooding your system making you feel unwell.

“That’s okay.” Jessie swings her legs over yours, sitting down on the bed next to you, she reaches for her own previously discarded shirt pulling it over her head quickly before returning her focus to you. “You don't need a reason, and it's also okay to just not be ready.”

You just nod. You stay staring ahead, where Jessie used to sit, now your eyes fell across the room on the empty wall. An unsettling feeling still in your stomach, you just wanted it to go away. Your brain felt like it was ready to explode and yet it was silent at the same time, having no idea how to process the emotions you went through.

You’re not sure how long it’s been when Jessie speaks again. “Do you want me to go? I can leave if you need some space, Or I can stay, it’s your choice, whatever will make you comfortable.”

You hardly had to think before you knew the answer “Stay?”

“Of course.” Jessie says, you can almost feel her relax into the bed slightly. She moves around, covering herself with the throw blanket that rested on your bed.

“You’re not mad?” Finally having the courage to speak, you ask, slightly terrified of what the answer might be.

“Why would I be mad?” She turns looking at you with a hint of sadness in her expression.

“I don’t know. I mean I started it, I made it seem like we were going to, ya know.” Your hands play with the blanket.

“I’ll never be mad at you for saying no, no one should ever get mad at you for that.” Her hand finds yours, encouraging you to stop fidgeting with the blanket. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Okay.” You turn, swinging your legs off the bed. “I’m going to get ready for bed, I have an extra toothbrush if you still want to spend the night.”

“Yeah, only if you’re sure?”

“I am, feel free to grab clothes from my dresser, if you wanted something besides what you’ve got on.” You point over where your dresser was against the wall. Jessie nods then moves toward the dresser opening a few drawers before finding your t-shirts. She looks through a few and then holds one up. M

“Cool if I take this one?” She holds it up to you. You nod before heading into the bathroom. While you’re rummaging through your closet to find the packaged toothbrush for Jessie she joins you, your shirt now across her chest and one of your favorite pairs of sweats on her legs. You can’t help but feel your stomach flutter at the sight of her in your clothes.

“Here ya go.” You hand her the toothbrush and she walks to your sink. “I’m going to go change, I’ll be right back.” Quickly throwing on sweatpants and a shirt of your own you return to the bathroom, washing your face and brushing your teeth before heading back toward your bed.

Jessie is standing at the foot of it, looking at you. “Do you have a side preference?” You shake your head before moving to the closest side of the bed, lifting the covers and beginning to climb in, you reach over setting an alarm for the morning. Jessie gets the idea and moves to the other side, putting her phone on the bedside table and climbing in as well.

You’d never slept next to anyone in a romantic way. Sure you’d shared beds with teammates before but never a teammate that you also kissed, and hugged, and lov-, really liked. You feel your face heating up at the near confession that just happened in your brain.

Despite the darkness of your room, Jessie somehow could see right through you. “Just lay how you normally would, pretend I’m not here.” Following her instructions you roll off your back and onto your side, facing away from Jessie. “There ya go.” Staring at the rest of your bedroom you can’t see, but feel the bed shift as Jessie moves around. “Is it okay if I lay behind you?”

“Yeah go ahead.” As you give her permission, Jessie moves and you suddenly feel her legs against yours before her chest is against your back.

“Can I put my arm around you?” Instead of verbally answering, you reach an arm of your own back, finding Jessie’s wrist and pulling her forward so her arm draped across your middle. “You comfortable?” She checked in with you.

“Yeah, I’m good.” That was mostly the truth, you were more comfortable than before, and Jessie’s body against yours was a welcomed warmth, but that didn’t mean it calmed your mind fully. Your mind was still thinking about how it had felt to have Jessie on top of you, your legs wrapped around her waist as she ever so slightly had rolled her hips, how it felt for her hands to be under your shirt, how her lips felt on your neck, and while you had loved all those things, you couldn’t stop thinking about how embarrassed you felt.

Here you were, an adult, still terrified of physical intimacy. You wanted it, you just couldn’t. It made it all too real. “I’m sorry.” It’s a weak apology from you that has Jessie immediately shushing in your ear.

She places a kiss to your shoulder and tightens her grip on your waist. “Go to sleep babe, nothing to be sorry for.”

[planetmimi]

decode - cl16

context: charles leclerc x black!fem!oc, some smau (cause i love those doooown)

faceclaim: @balialdn on insta

cw: none

summary: after a five-month social media break, artist Ahvi finally comes back to social media. her comeback is in the midst of dating rumors swirling around her and two of her...friends.

Italic = flashback

feedback is appreciated, this is my first one so please be nice

ahvi

liked by charles_leclerc, zendaya and 8.473.875 others

ahvi: my french is getting better, might use it in this project…maybe? (be calm yall)

f1lover: CHARLES WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! welcome back queen (im trying to be calm, i think i might actually explode from happiness)!!!

username74: oh look the whore is back

username54: awww we all hoped you would never come back

username12: no fr! when her contract ran out i thought that we were finally done with her

username276: YOU DIDNT SAY FOR A WHOLE YEAR MAAM

lewishamilton: new music, maybe?

ahvi: maybe… if you get me paddock passes

lewishamilton: ask your boyfriend...maybe

ahvi: blocked, reported and banned from listening to my music cause OMG?! i just got back too?! like please ntm on me

charles_leclerc: teaching you french has been quite the challenge, i would like some type of credit please

ahvi: if you podium i'll think about it

charles_leclerc: and if i get P1 i want a song written for me and to be in the music video

ahvi: *gasps in étonnement* thats asking for a lot, P1 twice this season and you've got yourself a deal

username67: you should have never come back nobody wants to hear your shitty music

stanningahvi: the fact that it’s been damn near two years without any new music… and a year since we've last seen you👁️👄👁️

lew_max.444: no cause if this is a trick…imma do something heinous

ahvi: is this a threat ? cause it’s kinda feeling like a threat

ahvi4f1: i mean…we can make it one if you want us to 🤷🏾‍♀️

zendaya: as your bestfriend i have to let you know, if you don’t drop this, i will do so for you (i will leak it)❤️

ahvi: sounds like less work for me tbh 🤷🏽‍♀️

zendaya: alright yall secret project dropping next month at 4 pm PST

ahvi: ouuu d*sney dupe 🤭

tomholland2013: please, don’t check your messages mate

zendaya: don’t listen to him. go check your messages babe. go ahead.

ahvi: #CANCELZENDAYA

liked by: zendaya, tomholland2013 and 45.856 others

ahvi

liked by: lewishamilton, sza and 5.946.087 others

ahvi: why didn't y'all tell me Australia is so hot ?? oh wait.. thats just me sorry y'all

landonorris : FIRST !

ahvi: 15th actually

landonorris : ......... you think you're so funny huh

ahvisdrafts: i mean she is actually a full time stand up comedian, part time singer-songwriter.

ahvi: you get it

username2: so, you and whats his face broke up and now you're going between F1 drivers?

f1grids: wow, never expected an A lister to become a grid groupie

girly2pop: are you ready to write a song for that man?

ahvi: stooop. shhhhhh. if no one mentions it EVER AGAIN i won’t have to do it

normani: tea is she's actually written like six of em already

georgerussell63: why is it always me?!

username29: girl we've heard the rumors about you getting around miss paddock princess

username : never would i have expected ahvi to become as close as she is with the f1 grid…like i didn't even know she knew what f1 was

username9: shes sleeping her way through it lol

username: girl you need to back up off charles

username6: no for real...going to australia three weeks before race week? way to scream desperate

Over the last year Ahvi has become somewhat of a hermit, between rumors swirling of a potential relationship between her and Charles, and her break up with her ex-friend becoming known to the public. All of this buzz around her name has generated a lot of hate, whether it be from her ex-friend's fans, Charles fans or her own haters. For the last year Ahvi has just been the internet's punching bag, despite not being active on the internet.

In the year she took away from social media a lot happened, a lot changed. Before she started her break, she was just off a stadium world tour, about to drop her first proper album. She felt on top of the world, until one day, with only three months left in her tour. Just before her second day at Wembly Stadium, when she fainted during soundcheck and was sent to the hospital.

- a year ago -

Her heartbeats so loud she almost can't hear what the nurse in front of her is saying. The nurse smiles lightly "I know this is probably very shocking, so I will give you some time, but your options are a bit limited with how far along you are." Ahvi nods, trying to process the words that were said to her, "I just- I'm sorry, I know I've made you say it to me a hundred times over but just...one more time and can I see the results."

"Don't worry, this is a common response in this situation," the nurse says as she hands over the blood test results. Ahvi looks at the blood test results, there it is, in black and white, "your HCG levels are higher than normal," the nurse points to her HCG results. Aleyah's eyes follow the nurse's finger, "Your results put you at being 17 weeks pregnant." There's that word again, pregnant, the one part of this she can't wrap her head around. As the nurse was talking to her an ultrasound tech brought in an ultrasound machine.

Ahvi tries her best to truly listen and absorb what the nurses are telling her as she lifts her shirt up to start the ultrasound. When the ultrasound tech brings the wand to where the gel was put a fast heartbeat fills the room and tears swell in the young singers eyes.

The 22-year-old looks at the ultrasound screen, a small incredulous whisper tumbles from her lips, "what the fuck."

[itsbansheebitch]

More thoughts

I get both sides, but I feel a little confused they couldn't find four people in their +25 employees

Data analyst (Are you seriously telling me you couldn't personally email or even just HIRE matpat's team who do data analytics as part of Theorist Media to help??? The man would be overjoyed to help???)

Editor (Put the first $6 towards a can of coffee grounds, dude)

PR Team (Even, like, a single person, please, for the love of god)

Business Major (Or literally anyone that has taken a home ec/budgeting/personal finance class)

First, the Dish Granted series was started when gold leaf burgers were novel, now it's seen as tone deaf (for obvious reasons) it should have shifted to something like interviews with people who make that kind of food or local businesses (like parmesan cheese shops in Parma, Italy) or the history of food (like talking about the history of modern Native American slavery on Californian wine vinyards). Not to mention the untapped potential of Food Fraud topics. Either shift it, or scrap it. Any data analyst or chronically online person could tell you that.

Second, why did you keep "anyone can afford $6 a month" in? Are the editors asleep at the wheel? Are they overworked? What is going on? You know damn well to not make generalizations about what people can afford. That's NEVER a good idea, especially when you KNOW (because YT gives you analytics) that most of your viewers are young (16/18-30/35 range, I'd guess) who probably, either 1, are still in school and either arent paid well/dont have jobs OR 2, arent paid well and tired of people's shit, like people who own businesses talking about "tough financial decisions." To them, Watcher isn't going to look different from the other people talking like that, because this was so sudden, with no input from fans, and in the video you hear shit like "anyone can afford [X]." To be frank, it wouldn't really matter what the amount is, because that generalization goes against the message they have stood by for years. THAT is a slap in the face.

Third, what are yall doing with the budgeting? Every artist has a right to make art that they are proud of. Every artist deserves to have their work seen if they so choose. Every artist deserves to make a living. HOWEVER, there are MANY options online when it comes to making money, especially on YT. You could get into marketing, data analysis, expanding your demographic, looking at what people are interested in right now VS what will stand the test of time (not gold leaf burgers), etc.

You have to either have these skills, develop these skills, or hire someone to do it for you. It's understandable that you would want a team behind the production, but I find +25 employees to be WAY too many people, especially in LA. Bailey Sarian has a Dark History section on her YT (and Spotify podcast) where she has hired historians to help make sure her episodes are as accurate as possible. You've caught heat before from Puppet History's missing & incorrect info, you should do the same. She has about three (3) "intermissions" per episode for ad breaks. I never see anyone complain. People WOULD listen to yall talk for that long (+1 hour videos), tbh, though that's not necessary.

Why are yall out here with Teslas, expensive food, new gear, scripts (where there weren't scripts before, PH is different, that makes sense), and "better than TV" level sets??? I need to put your accountant in this week's church prayer list what the actual hell??? Ya'll, this video is literally the meme:

Guys help me budget:

LA Rent: 2K per month

Videos: 100K per vid

+25 Employees: God only knows

New stuff for videos: Don't get me started

Like, are you serious?

You have a right to do whatever you want with your art. You have a right to charge whatever you'd like for that art. You have a right to make a living from your art and you have a right to ask your fans for money.

Your fans have a right to be angry when they've been supporting yall for, what, almost 10 years? They have a right to choose when and where to spend their money even when you've made an impact. They have a right to feel betrayed, especially when there are better options (like Nebula or consulting with Theorist Media).

Fans DO NOT have a right to be racist to any members of Watcher, now that they have made a decision they do not agree with.

I personally, think this is a really silly decision and could have been solved (haha solved) with a simple YT poll, but apparently we had to get... this. I respect their decision, I just don't think it was a smart one. I wish them the best, and I hope they find a better solution. Any further comment from me will depend on what steps they take next.

[harlowarchives]

chp 3 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 ! ୨ .  ˚ ໒꒱

hello my babies im so late but heres hope chapter 3! as i announced there would a time jump so now our baby is 4, this book’s drama is only starting i swear. but 𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 enjoy <33

↳ listen to take you there by her, hurt you by toni braxton and baby face & potential by summer walker.

no 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 today ladies.

Jack had been coming home later & later every night because of his management and label, he'd been missing doctor’s appointments which was unusual for him so Sevyn was alone every night. She needed help, her stomach was only getting bigger, and every task became ten times harder. Midnight came & the front door opened Sevyn sat at the kitchen counter eating a bowl of ice cream she watched Jack quickly walk past her, “Where are you going? You even didn't say anything.” Sevyn walked toward Jack who had his weight on the bathroom sink opening the mirror cabinet “Are you ok?” Jack didn't even bother to face her. Sevyn noticed an odd smell coming from his sweatshirt “Are you high?” She questioned skewing her face he faced her his eyes low & slightly red “N—” she shook her head dismissing him and stormed up the stairs before he could see her tears. She buried her head in the sheets after locking the bedroom door tears flowed down her cheeks like a river she heard Jack knock on the bedroom door repeating her name “Just open the door.” He pleaded in a raspy voice “You go out leave me by myself for hours lie to me about where you're at, get high drunk things you never do. I understand the pressure Jack, or maybe I don't but why do you treat me this way after I constantly support you, why me?” Her voice was shaky & tears ran down her cheeks. Jack slid down the door his head on his knees “Sevyn, I'm sorry.” He inhaled, “That gets old Jack.”

Tears streamed down Sevyn’s face her eyes burned, she prayed things would change because she loved him & being the mother of his child was all she’d ever wished for. Jack was the love of her life she knew that since laid eyes on him.

Sevyn woke up at around 3:00 pm & walked to the living room expecting to see Jack but he was nowhere to be found the car wasn't in the driveway either & his shoes weren’t there. She began packing her things getting ready to leave. She sat in her Cadillac watching him on Instagram at the club drinking bottles of vodka while random women rubbed his lap, She was embarrassed but she kept her composure. She blocked all of his social media accounts and his phone number, She wasn't one to up & leave but this was too much he had disrespected her time & time again she was exhausted. He showed no respect for her as the mother of his child and his girlfriend, now she was over it.

Sevyn sat at her desk humming a gentle tune, melodic & mellow. She tapped her pen against her hardwood desk “Sevyn it's perfect I don't think you should change it.” Sayori smiled as Jordyn nodded in agreement “She’s right Sev I love it so will the world.” Sevyn shook her head “Yall it doesn't sound right something just so wrong about it!” She spoke her voice raising slightly causing Jordyn to throw her hands up. Everyone in the studio turned their attention to the studio door hearing small footsteps approaching the room and seeing Jack, Urban & Hope outside the frosted glass door. Urban lifted Hope helping her twist the knob, the door popped open and a smile spread across Sevyn’s face “Hey pumpkin!” Sevyn smiled as Hope ran into her mother’s arms causing the rolling chair to slide back on the engineering table “Hi Mommy, what are you doing?” Hope smiled resting her head on Sevyn’s chest “Working babe, you wanna hear my song?” Sevyn smiled watching her daughter's eyes light up with excitement “Yeah Mommy, let's hear the song!” Urban & Jack said in sync. Sevyn pressed the resume button on her laptop & started the song from the beginning playing a song called ‘Take You There’ Everyone in the studio seemed to be entranced in the music. Sevyn sang the lyrics to Hope tickling her a bit.

The song in the studio went silent, Jack let out a deep sigh “Sevyn, I think this is the best song on the album.” Urban spoke looking over at Jack who uncomfortably shifted in his seat he got up and shot a look at Urban who was still comfortably seated “Alright, I got her lunch so she's not hungry right now. Everything she brought is getting washed, I'll text you later.” Jack said his mouth in a line, Sevyn nodded as Urban shot up high-fiving Hope, Jack held out his arms signaling a hug Hope quickly got up and fell into his arms “Bye, Papa.” She smiled as he placed a gentle kiss on her head “Later, kiddo I love you.” He smiled setting her down as “I love you too.” She smiled as Urban & Jack walked out the door. “No one else was confused as to why he left after you played the song?” Sayori questioned squinting before looking around “I don't know he's been acting strange lately super strange, he just drops her off & doesn't say anything.” Sevyn shrugged thinking a bit more about it “We always have a conversation & if we don't he has somewhere to be.” Sevyn continued “I'm not mad or anything he's not obligated to have a conversation with me it's just not like him which is what concerns me.” Sevyn added starting to ramble “Mommy can we go home?” Hope asked tapping Sevyn on the chest “Yes baby.” Sevyn smiled.

After a long studio session, Sevyn & Hope were outside the house. They got inside & Sevyn began getting herself and Hope ready for bed, Bathtime ended now The two were lying on the bed watching Proud Family. Sevyn felt her phone vibrate underneath her so she looked at her screen and saw a message from Jack “We need to talk.” He texted “Yeah, what's up?” She responded “Was the song about me? Yes or no, no extra shit Sevyn.” He said, “Yes, I wrote it because I saw a picture of us in high school it inspired me.” She responded, “Is that a problem?” She double-texted “No it's not I mean I'll figure it out.” He texted back, “Okay, also what's up with you? You're avoiding me now?” She sent getting left on read.

🏷️ 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐒 ⁱ : @lexxlovesjack @iknowdatsrightbih @iheartharlow @livsters @honeyharlows @killatravtramp @jackmanduh @itsyagirljaz

[lokilysolbitch]

im talking about silly hex info i heard on witchtok again

i posted another version of this on tiktok too hopefully people are chill abt it

every now and i hear someone saying something about how you cant use salt in baneful magic and im just now processing that bc whaaaaatttttttt???????????????????????? salt????????????????? huh???????????????????????????????

spell ingredients have so much more potential when you think about why they could have the associations they do. metaphysical and physical properties are not isolated from each other. a big part of my practice is taking into consideration what items do for me physically, which is how I can find ways to use things like Tums and plastic in my workings. so what does salt do? its put in near everything to preserve it, it's absorbent, cleansing and its shape is useful to help roughly scrub surfaces, flavor enhancing, too much can damage a heart, some types are sharp, etc

AND REMEMBER NOT TO PUT SALT (except epsom salt thats fine) IN THE EARTH. ITS FUCKS UP THE SOIL SUPER BAD FOR A SUPER LONG TIME

and theres different types of salt too. maybe it depends of the brand but the celtic sea salt i have is pointy as hell. if you eat it raw (listen i have POTS okay) it will slice your tongue up and then dissolve as if it were never there. and yall dont think you can use that in a hex??????

im gonna drop some potential baneful uses for salt because its literally too easy (and remember to consider the people around your target. ex) abusers that feel bad will try to make it everyone elses problem so maybe find a way to protect potential victims)

every time someone is awful to you, put your anger, sadness, feelings of betrayal, into some salt. put all things you want to say to them in the salt. collect all the anger salt when you think it's gotten bad enough to the point you need to hex them, and use that in the hex. maybe you can pile it on top of a representation of them(the sharp celtic sea salt is good for this). or bake with the angry salt and gift it to them. BONUS: water can represent emotions, so get some water to represent their emotional state and dissolve that salt in there so your anger at them is now their anger at them and ideally it will either push them to change or torment them if they don't. and since its dissolved salt it will be a little harder for the target to identify a foreign influence

get a representation of them and scrub salt into it. celtic sea salt is good here too. this is good for very harshly scrubbing off their bullshit and bad habits or beliefs. yes this is cleansing your target. thats the point.

use it to bring out the qualities of like,, literally anything

salt sucks up water. water is very important. suck up their important water, (whatever you have the water represent, like energy, tranquility, resources, a certain emotion, etc ). let their well run dry.

use salt to set boundaries on your hex. contain where all the baneful energy is going so it doesn't spread to innocent people

remember how i said salt fucks up the earth. :))) if you wanna halt their growth for a long long time, represent them with a bowl of soil and salt it.

i adore salt and all her uses. she's in near everything for a reason.

im dissociating as i type this so if there's any typos dont worry about it

xx

[alleycat-arcade]

Game Start... The Seven Lords: Love Paradise...

...

Why do I look so dejected? It's nothing, don't worry about it. Hmm? Oh, I don't think you want to play that machine. I've only seen a specific group of regulars playing that one.

Are you sure? Alright, if you insist. Let me know if you need any games to cleanse your palette.

(My friends are being little bastards again and asked me to make this for them. They offered me something I couldn't refuse, a get out of Gay Baby Jail free card. Anyway, I hope yall get some form of joy from this lmao.)

Housedemon Headcanons (Obey Me! Shall We Date?: Brothers Part 1)

Content Warnings: Crackish?, but the rest is fluff, Potential out of chara stuff, and pre-established relationship(Since this is a play on the phrase housewife and or malewife), some mature content

⚝──⭒─⭑─⭒──⚝

Lucifer:

How? How did you manage to get him to leave the House of Lamentation AND Diavolo so he could live with you in the human world? And a better question is, how did you convince him that the Devildom won't burn down in his absence, be it by his brothers or even the demon prince himself?

The best case scenario I can imagine is that the two of you go back and forth between the two realms. The two of you stay in your home in the human world for at most a month every now and then, and spend the rest of the time in the Devildom. But while you're in your cozy little home with just the two of you, you do your best to make sure he does as little work as possible. That means you end up being the one to pay the bills while Luci takes care of the house.

He was originally against the idea of staying home, he had even started looking for jobs in the area. But, he does love you, and if you really want him to be a "housedemon", he'll eventually give in. ("Mc, it's fine. I can pick up a decent paying office job around here at this nearby company." "Luci, honey. I love you, but what company is going to hire someone named Lucifer? Did you already forget that you were too stubborn to change the name on our marriage certificate to a fake one?")

But to be honest, he enjoys having the time away from paperwork and dealing with his brothers. Lucifer is a lot more relaxed than usual, especially when you return home.

Your house is pretty much clean all the time, since Luci usually cleans up messes long before they get out of control. Since he's used to having a routine most of the time, he likes to keep a similar one in the Human World.

He usually has all his daily housework done by the time you get home. Typically, you can find him in his study or in the living room listening to something on his record player and reading a novel. On the rare occasion you catch him watching something on TV, but he's quick to shut it off when he hears you come in.

The way his eyes soften and he gives you a gentle smile when you come in the door? C'est magnifique. It's the same smile you usually see when you bring him coffee and urge him away from his paperwork back in the Devildom, but it lacks that sense of fatigue he usually has.

If you're home before he starts on dinner, he's there waiting for you. If you do come home around the time he's still cooking it, it is the perfect opportunity to sneak up behind him and give him a hug. Devildom dishes are much different than human dishes, and many human ingredients are easily ruined in a short span of time, so he's usually pouring most of his attention into that. You can surprise him if you're quiet enough, but most of the time he'll let you do it anyway. Should you happen to be taller than him, press a soft kiss against the top of his head for some added softness to the chuckle he lets out when he feels your arms around his waist. Don't try and do this back home in the Devildom though, he'll likely think one of his brothers is messing with him and you'll get a wing to the face.

Side-note: Somehow a few issues from the Devildom trickle between the cracks and Lucifer has to return for a moment. Usually it's about minor issues that he can run there and back in less than a day to take care of, but when it happens at some of your "private" moments Luci's in a fairly pissy mood for a hot minute. You cannot count the number of calls for help you got from the brothers on your D.D.D. when they had called at the climax of the two of you's downtime to tell Luci that somehow one of them lit Hell's Kitchen on fire.

Mammon:

Mammon isn't fully against the idea, but he may need some encouraging. He just wants to make sure he keeps his Greed in check for you and you don't end up hurt or broke from it. If you snuck a peek at some of the books he's been reading lately, you can tell he's trying his best. The covers range from "How to Deal with a Gambling Addiction", to "The Best Ways to Keep a House Neat and Tidy: For Demons". Don't point it out to him too soon though, or he'll go bright red and deny everything. Mams is a lot tamer with his whole tsundere thing now that he put a ring on your finger, but it still slips in every now and then.

When he moves in with you in the Human World, like his older brother, he immediately offers to get a job to pay some bills. Except, unlike Luci, he wasn't as stubborn to refuse putting a pseudonym on the marriage certificate. (Your Devildom one has his name on it anyway.) But, Mammon is very weak for his beloved human, some pleading and puppy eyes and he's putty in your hands.

There's a little mess around the house sometimes, but it never lasts too long. He's usually pretty good at keeping the house clean, aside from a stray dirty towel or a few dishes left out in the sink. If his brothers are coming over, he deep cleans the house. They likely don't pick on him as much since he's not in the Devildom as often as usual(and he's genuinely improved from your presence in his life). His brothers do nearly have a heart attack when they come in to the intense smell of lemon and fresh linens, not to mention Mammon in an apron tending to some indoor plants.

Mammon seems like the type who'd never think they'd like gardening, but actually loves it when they get into it. There is a ton of fresh veggies in his garden that he usually uses to cook with, but he grows a separate garden purely for corn. Why? To feed his adoring crows of course! He pretty much has a fan club of entirely crows that land in the backyard on a set schedule. They don't leave much of a mess behind though, but Mammon probably asks them not to. He likely also grows some flowers as well, but most of them are for you. Ones that remind him of you, ones that you say you like, et cetera et cetera.

You don't need to adopt a dog to have a Golden Retriever come barreling down the stairs to give you a hug and cover you in kisses when you come home. No matter what time it is, if he's not cooking or asleep, he's booking it to greet you at the door. Mammon will get all blushy if you playfully tease him about it, probably ends up just burying his face in your neck and muttering about it.

His cooking is fairly decent, but he did burn a few things when he was getting the hang of it. He does like indulging in some fast food or some spicy ramen when he just doesn't have the energy to cook, usually after a visit from his brothers. The two of you will just sit on the couch and watch something you both enjoy while sharing a blanket and having dinner.(Bonus points if its a cheesy Rom-Com)

Side-note: While he may not act like it or be given respect of the title most of the time, he IS the Avatar of Greed and one of the strongest demons in the Devildom. So, he'll likely be called back every now and then. If you're not working that day, he'll take you with him and the two of you just spend the rest of the night out on the town in the Devildom. Perhaps he may indulge a little in gambling with your supervision, as a treat. If you are working and can't get out of it, he'll bring you back cute little souvenirs. You might find an extra large extra cursed Zombie Iguana plush laying on your couch when he gets back.

Leviathan:

"Lol okay" ..."Wait, seriously?"

Levi is still trying to wrap his head around the fact that you two are married in the first place, but now you want to have him live with you in the Human World with just the two of you? He's gonna need a moment hang on. Okay, okay he's good now. But seriously, he'd likely be one of the easiest to get out of the Devildom. He will need a bit to make sure he packs up a good chunk of his stuff and Henry 2.0 to bring to the house and the rest will remain at home with the strongest protection spells he can manage on his room. Lotan probably keeps guard in there as well.

He is a little apprehensive at the idea of not helping out paying for things since he's taken up Part-time jobs for extra Grimm before, but he eases into it with some reassurance. Plus, when you call him your cute little housedemon he feels like he is going to melt into the floor.

He does his best to keep things neat and tidy, but sometimes he gets too enraptured in a different task that he forgets about the other he was about to do. The two of you make it a sort of bonding activity to do some of the leftover housework together on your off days. He doesn't mind when his brothers drop by, but he does ask them to wipe their shoes/take off their shoes when they come in the door. The brothers at first assumed that the cleanliness was from you and that wherever he games at is a mess, but when they can't find much more that some trash that hasn't been taken out yet and a little dust, they're definitely surprised. The main thing that doesn't surprise them is seeing Levi in an oversized Ruri-chan shirt while cleaning.

Hobbies wise, streaming is something probably obvious that he does. He doesn't do it for any intention of money though, he just likes interacting with other people who play the same games or share the same interests as him. You're a mod in his chat, and he you can hear how happy he is when you pop in to say hi during your lunch break. If he gains enough confidence, he'll ask you if he can commission someone for a Vtuber avatar. Other than streaming, he does enjoy sewing an assortment of items. Mostly cosplay stuff, but he's sewn you and him matching plush toys, matching Halloween costumes, and any tears or rips in your clothes.

Depending on how late in the day it is, he may be asleep on the couch waiting for you with one of your favorite two player games up on the TV. You almost don't want to wake him up, but that sleepy smile he gives you when you do is too tempting to let him just lay there. There are actually rare days in which you return home earlier than him, which are when he needs to deal with things in the Devildom as Grand Admiral. Those nights, you cook up his favorite meal and wait for him to come home. Levi hasn't even managed to shrug his coat off or remove his hat at the door before he gets his welcome home kiss. Depending on the kind of day he's had, he might need a massage.

His cooking is alright, but he excels in baking. There's almost not a single day that there isn't a beautiful cake in the fridge that's themed after a character. One cannot describe the amount of joy in the room when it's time for the two of you to have dessert and you take turns feeding bites to each other. He's glad his brothers aren't around, so he doesn't have to hear the sounds of fake gagging.

Side-note: Levi actually begins to gain some confidence from your encouragement and just being around you all the time. He's still not too fond of social situations, but he's far more comfortable when he's holding your hand. So, the two of you do go to a handful of conventions together in matching cosplays.

Satan:

Honestly, Satan is all up for it. If he wasn't concerned for how his brothers would react, he'd pack up that night. He's more than happy to follow you to the ends of the Earth and back, considering just how much trust there is between the two of you to even marry in the first place.

"You want me to just take care of the house and then do whatever else I want?" "Yeah, basically." "So I can just read for as long as I want?" "Pretty much."

Jokes aside, he doesn't actually spend all of his time reading. A good chunk of it yes, but there's still plenty of time leftover to do other things since he doesn't have RAD to worry about.

The two of you adopt a cat not too long after he moves in. Don't worry if you're allergic, he's researched enough about cats to know which ones won't cause your allergies to flare up.

He's good at cleaning, but not at organizing. Sure, he can stack up his books in nice and neat piles, but for the love of- just put them back on the damn shelves. Satan can't say he's not surprised when he sees a few books on organization show up miraculously in his piles. He'll try his best for you, but his disorganization is a tough habit to break(probably started out of teenage rebellion lol).

Lucifer thinks you've replaced him with an identical copy when the brothers come to visit and the books are put up all neat and tidy, the laundry is folded and put away nicely, and the Avatar of Wrath is in the middle of cooking dinner in a vaguely cat-shaped pan.

Speaking of his brothers visiting, do ensure he knows long ahead of time so he can make sure his magical barriers on a certain closet is as strong as possible. He does not want to listen to centuries of teasing about all of his cat-themed clothing items. Not that he doesn't like them, he loves wearing them more than his regular clothes which is why you keep buying them for him. He also doesn't want them walking in when he's got his hair tied back and a "Kiss the Kitten" apron on.

Satan usually spends the times that he's done cleaning and he doesn't feel like reading watching a lot of Human World dramas with your shared cat on his lap. If he's really into a specific one, he'll sometimes leave it on while he's cleaning with the subtitles on and the TV loud enough for him to hear it over the vacuum cleaner. The neighbors may hate him, but he does not really care since he's doing it within the hours you're allowed to be loud anyway. Other than watching dramas or reading, I could see him picking up a little bit of fitness on the side. Something simple and stress relieving. Though you do have a punching bag downstairs if he's feeling particularly stressed.

You can pretty much expect Satan to be waiting up for you on the couch when you get home or in the kitchen. He'll smile and hold you close, but if he's feeling playful that day he may do a mixture of whining and teasing at you. Some nights you do get home very late and find him absolutely wiped out on the couch. If you're strong enough, he'd be more than happy to have you carry him to bed. If you aren't though, he's plenty happy waking up to you snuggling into his arms on the couch.

He doesn't head to the Devildom much, but it's usually with you if you're available. He does need to keep his connection network up and as an Avatar he does have some work to do. If you aren't there with him, he sends you a lot of messages throughout the day of just whatever he's thinking about or saw.

Side-note: He won't admit it in front of his brothers, especially not Levi, but he has been influenced by the third born a good bit. Every now and then Satan indulges in some story-rich video games or anime. He almost got caught in the middle of playing a game with anime scenes in it, but settled for throwing his D.D.D. as hard and far across the room as possible instead of getting caught. He'll only indulge in front of you.

⚝──⭒─⭑─⭒──⚝

(I had this already written for my friends who wanted it, and hadn't planned on posting it but the newest chapter on one of my fics is taking a little longer than usual. So, yeah, here we are. Do not look at me please. If there is any weird bits in it, please take it up with the simps in my friend group and discord.)

[anotherghoul666]

🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your fics?

💔 Have any of your fics broken your heart? Bonus: what about someone else's? I'm always in the market for a fic that'll make me cry lol

✅ What's something that appears over and over again in your fics even if you don't mean for it to?

🤩 Who's your favorite character to write?

🧠 (for Rain please)

💞 Who's your comfort character?

🎶 (I know you don't listen to anything while writing, but I'm curious about a song you've had on loop :D)

Thank you so much Fruits!! :D :D I appreciate you taking the time to leave these!

🤭 Do you have a favorite tag to use when posting your fics? I tag what's in the fic as accurately as possible in terms of kinks, sex acts, story types, and potential triggers so people can avoid what they need to. I do like to tag something funny or descriptive to put a bit of personality in my fic's description, tags like "I'm still here to hurt Dew what can I say" or "Dewdrop thinks he's the dom. He's not." XD So potential readers can get a taste for what's inside and my sense of humor :)

💔 Have any of your fics broken your heart? Bonus: what about someone else's? I'm always in the market for a fic that'll make me cry lol Well the one angsty hurtful fic I wrote is Loosened Heart. It didn't break my heart so much as it was super cathartic to write. Like purging an abscess. If I think about it, in my life, I don't think I've ever written a piece that made me cry or broke my heart while I wrote it. I'd need some months of distance with a fic to be able to "live" it and get the emotions from it I intended for the reader to have. I need detachment and a pair of fresh eyes, not my author eyes. As far as a fic rec for something that made me cry, the first one that came to mind is Butterfly Garden by @youhaveahomeinmyheart. If you haven't read this one yet Fruits? Be ready with a box of tissues. I was in PAIN. It DESTROYED ME and I LOVED IT.

✅ What's something that appears over and over again in your fics even if you don't mean for it to? Power dynamics. Though I 100% mean for that to appear. It's the foundation of my work. Playing with power and exchanges and switches is my thing. My sense of humor apparently is a constant in every fic and it gets noticed xD I didn't think so many people were here for my sarcasm and silly jokes, but I'm happy to see it! Lore. Massive amounts of lore that are almost never a part of the outline, but my brain needs an explanation for smut to happen. I'm not one of those authors that can just open on sex or kink already started. I wish I could, I'd write a lot quicker with that skill XD But I guess I'm just too demisexual for that, my characters need *reasons* to play and/or fuck, and that means, for example, 4k words of lore before Aether and Ifrit get together in my current fic xD Is it necessary? Probably not. Do I have a ton of fun writing it? You bet! hahaha I also very much like to describe the first time characters do something. New experiences. Discoveries. Of a kink, of sensations, of themselves, of each other. Doesn't matter, but the element of discovery and experimentation is a common thing I like to write for. Surprise, mental processes, evaluations, "oh. Oh." moments. I love those a ton. If yall pick out shared elements in my writing, let me know! I'm interested to hear it!

🤩 Who's your favorite character to write? It's Dew. It's gotta be Dew. This feral gremlin. Riddled with issues and insecurities. The walking contradiction he is. The abrasive personality as a defense mechanism. The absolute sweetness and care under it all he wouldn't be caught dead showing explicitly. The yearning for attention, for being wanted, the yearning for pain and horrible horrible things to happen to him, the desperation. The impulsivity, the rejection sensitivity, the hypervigilence, the sheer ADHD I write this guy with (I project neurodivergence on some of my characters in various ways, I specifically code Dew with ADHD traits for my ND readers to pick up on). The bad decisions. The self destructive inclinations. The unbearable love he has for his pack and his Papa. The privilege he feels for being a part of this gang of weirdos he constantly torments. He is so layered. So nuanced. So much fun. He flows out of me like the clearest sparkling river from a mountaintop, he's so easy to write. Absolutely painless of a subject, so I may put him through pain as a reward. I adore him and I can't wait to get back to him honestly. Second fav is Swiss. He also flows and writes very easily.

🧠 Pick a character, and I’ll tell you my favorite headcanon for them (for Rain please) Rain is a fucking cryptid my guy, I'm still trying to figure him out even after having written him so much XD Rain very much Does Not Flow and it Not Easy to write. But, there are still a few headcanons I have solidly embedded in my version of our favorite water ghoul. Namely, similarly to how I just mentionned I project ADHD on Dew, I project my own autism on Rain a lot. Rain has hypersensitivity, he has sensory processing difficulties, but he is also a sensory seeker, just, with very specific senses. He is primarily a tactile sensory seeker, he stims on textures a lot. Because the texture is nice and it makes him feel good, or as a response to a stresser, to help him process his emotions and get out of the flood of anxiety, keep focused. He stims by running his fingers on his clothes, his sleeves, his environment, the furniture, his bass a whole lot, his hair, etc. Another key trait I project on him is, Rain learns by imitation. He mirrors people. He mirrors personalities, matches energies, his mask is a reflection of who is in front of him, until he feels safe and comfortable enough to unmask (which he'd mostly do around his pack, in private). He needs to see someone do a thing first to feel like it's normal enough of a thing to do, and then he can do it. He seeks permission to do or say or think things by seeking someone else who does the same. Even if he wants to do something, if he's the only one, he won't do it. He'll assume it's too weird. But if someone else does it first, he'll follow. Enthusiastically. Maybe over-enthusiastically sometimes. You see it on stage the most, when he follows Dew around and imitates his stomps for example, but when he's by himself he's calm and he won't move too much. He can't move by himself, what if he looks weird?; but if Dew's headbagning like a mad man, he can headbang too. Permission seeker. He's the same when he speaks. He'll keep his sentences short and to the point, unless someone asks him a question, opens a door, or otherwise gives him space. He'll then info dump and/or overshare like there's no tomorrow. Because he doesn't know when someone's gonna let him talk next. So he has to get the flood out now.

💞 Who's your comfort character? The entirety of current era Ghost dude. They all bring such a sense of safety and joy to me. I couldn't name just one.

🎶 (I know you don't listen to anything while writing, but I'm curious about a song you've had on loop :D) Just, overall? OK, well, Imma take the space to talk about music for a bit. 1) The Death of Peace Of Mind album by Bad Omens has been on repeat in my ears for about 10 days now. Stellar album from start to finish. It's a damn shame I got on the Bad Omens train on January 1st 2023 cause if I'd listened to that album like, a week before, it would have been on my top albums of 2022 list. Easily in the top 5. Excellent album. Every single song is like it's out of a different genre. These guys are flawless at every music genre they touch. Classic metalcore, heavy deathcore, vibe songs, ambient, synthwave, emo early 2000s music, industrial, goth, trap. It's Atreyu meets Linkin Park meets Bullet for my Valentine meets Post Malone meets The Weeknd meets Whitechapel meets Nine Inch Nails meets Rob Zombie, The Album. You name it, they can do it. And the album as a whole still manages to be coherent and have a throughline??! Masterminds I say. Bucketlist band to see live in 2023. I need it. 2) SLEEP TOKEN. DUDEE. DUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE. SLEEP FUCKING TOKEN. I slept (haha, get it) on these guys and I hate myself for just finding them now. And by now I mean today. This morning. I heard they released two new tracks last week back to back and they've been making waves in the metal world, so I checked them out. I. FELL IN LOVE. SO FAST. I'm actually still kinda reeling from how obsessed I am with these two songs. Chokehold if you're into less of a heavy vibe, The Summoning for the heavier track. Yo. Fucking. THE LAST MINUTE AND A HALF OF THE SUMMONING. I want to fuck this song. This is some of the absolute sexiest metal I've ever heard. I want to eat these songs, I want to comsume them, I want to melt into them, I want them to enter my molecules and become a part of the biologic material that is my body. I cannot wait for this album to come out. If the rest of it sounds anything like these two songs, I might call album of the year right there.

[too-gay-for-marvel]

one of us

a/n: I LIVE! listen. listen. yall know me well enough at this point to know that i make no promises about posting more stuff. i might post something in a few months. maybe next week. lets spin the wheel of fate and see what happens, shall we?

Request:  hi!! do you think you could write a prequel of sorts to i don’t need a hero? it’s one of my absolute favorites and i was wondering if you could write something angsty for the mission where the reader gets shot protecting wanda? <33 thank you!!

Word Count: 2546

Warnings: swearing, canon-typical violence

Pairing: Wanda x Reader

She hated you.

Wanda Maximoff absolutely, unquestionably, without a doubt hated you. There was not a single thing about you that she didn’t hate, from the stupid cocky look on your face to the way you refused to be of any help. You were supposed to be an ally now, not a nuisance.

And yet there you were.

Sitting across from her at the table and shooting her a look that made her want nothing more than to throw some magic right at your face. If she was lucky then maybe it would even knock you on your ass and she could wipe that stupid smirk from your face. It would almost make this meeting with you worth all the hassle.

“Does everyone understand their jobs?” Maria asked, bringing Wanda back to the table and forcing her to pay attention.

“Blow shit up and have fun doing it?” You asked even though that most certainly wasn’t your job and you knew it.

Don’t let them out of your sight. Maria’s voice rang in Wanda’s mind and, after a silent look, she gave a nod of affirmation. It didn’t seem as if you had noticed, and that gave Wanda a feeling of superiority. Technically it wasn’t a competition, and she already knew she was better than you, but to know that she could scheme about you in front of your face was something that gave her more joy than she would ever openly admit.

The meeting concluded without a hitch. You had even admitted - rather begrudgingly - that you were to do nothing other than keep the attention off of Wanda and Sam. In Wanda’s mind, that was a good start; you usually argued until you were blue in the face.

But with you agreeing, all Wanda had to really worry about was the upcoming mission. And whether you would keep to your word or not.

----------

By all accounts, and much to Wanda’s and Sam’s surprise, the mission had been going well. You had launched fireworks on one end of the building to cause a commotion while they had snuck in through the back. She had used her powers to distract the few guards left inside, and within minutes they had found what they were looking for.

In fact, the mission had been going so well that Wanda had been on the verge of asking if you were okay. There was no way you could have behaved for as long as you had, not without a proper motivation. But right as Wanda had lifted her hand to start her comms, an unusually loud explosion sounded off, quickly followed by guards running and yelling.

Heading in their direction.

“I knew it was too good to be true,” Wanda mumbled to herself.

Only seconds after Wanda had muttered her lack of surprise at the situation, the same guards she had heard appeared in the hallway behind them. Directly between them and their exit.

Of course, she heard Sam think. Very loudly.

It turned, very quickly, into an all-out brawl. Unlike you, they didn’t exactly aim to kill; if it was avoidable then they would. But that didn’t mean there weren’t still plenty of bodies lying on the ground, continuously making it harder and harder for them to leave.

“To the roof,” Sam ordered during a short lull in the fighting. “We can get an emergency evac from there.”

And before Wanda knew it, they were once again fighting and trying to make their way up the stairs. It wasn’t the most difficult thing in the world, not with her powers and Red Wing. But that didn’t mean it was easy either.

“Leaving already?” You asked over the comms, causing both Wanda and Sam to roll their eyes at the lack of seriousness in your tone.

“Just get to the roof,” Sam replied shortly, refusing to say anymore on the matter.

“When I’m ready.”

Wanda swore if she hadn’t promised Bucky not to kill you, she would have done it then and there.

It didn’t take long after that for Wanda and Sam to make it to the roof. He told her he was going to fly around and scope a potential landing, and Wanda agreed to hold down the fort until he came back. They both ignored the fact that you were nowhere to be found.

In typical Avengers fashion, the guards came back not long after Sam had left her alone. She wished she could have been surprised, but when it happens nearly every time, it loses it’s shock factor.

But this one was worse than usual; Wanda was, unfortunately, feeling overwhelmed. She knew the horde would run out of bodies eventually, but would that happen before or after Sam showed up? She had no clue, and that was something that terrified her.

Needless to say, she got her answer when an entire army made it up to the roof.

“That’s my cue,” your voice came over the comms, a little too cheery for the situation, but Wanda wasn’t going to answer. At that moment, she hoped you burned along with the rest of them.

An explosion rocked the building underneath her feet, sending more panic racing through her veins. Fucking idiot, she thought, you’re going to destroy the building with us still in it! More explosions followed suit.

“You’d better hurry, Sam, Y/N is gonna blow the building,” Wanda spoke clearly, but rushed. As terrified as she was, she knew it would do no good if Sam didn’t even understand her.

“Just a bit longer, I’m almost there.” She didn’t like that Sam sounded more panicked than her.

“Need a hand?” Your voice came through again, but it was drowned out by a roar that grew increasingly louder.

It was a missile. A missile that was going to hit the roof. The roof that she was standing on.

“Just move!”

Wanda was too transfixed by the missile heading her way to notice someone running toward her. Someone who quickly wrapped their arms around her waist. Her body tensed as her feet were lifted off the ground and she was suddenly launched off the side of the building right as the missile hit the spot where she had previously been standing.

Wind rushed past her ears, along with something that sounded like a scream. She couldn’t tell who it was coming from. The trip to the ground took only a moment, but felt like it was never going to end. Well, not until she forcefully met the ground, that is. The air was knocked out of her lungs and the person on top of her didn’t help.

“Get off me,” she grunted as she pushed the person off and sat up. Only when she was up did she notice it was you, new scratches on your face and blood dripping down your ears.

“You stupid Avengers, always in the way,” you mumbled just loud enough for Wanda to hear. Or maybe it was just muffled because of the deafening ringing in her ears.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Wanda shouted, pushing herself onto her feet and watching as you did the same.

“What do you mean, what was I thinking?” You shot back. “You were the one who didn’t move!”

“I didn’t need your help.”

“You almost got hit! By a missile!”

“And yet you were the one who launched it!” Wanda stepped forward, her finger jabbing into your chest as she talked.

“I saved your life!” You shouted back, throwing your hands up in indignation.

“You pushed me off a building!”

“Don’t criticise me! No one else was helping!”

“I didn’t need help from some wannabe hero!”

“I’m not trying to-” you were cut off by the sound of a gun, and your eyes widening. You both looked down to see a dark red spot near your hip, growing larger by the second.

You hit the ground before she could catch you.

Wanda looked past you to see one lone guard, his shirt still on fire and his skin singed beyond recognition. His arm was still up, gun pointed where you had previously been standing. She didn’t have to bother with finishing him; he collapsed, his body slowly burning.

She crouched down immediately, her hand moving to the spot on your hip. Her hands went to press on it; something she had learned from Maria and Natasha, something she hadn’t thought she would ever really need to know.

You groaned ever so slightly when she pressed harder, but aside from that you were silent and still.

“Coming in hot,” Sam said. She didn’t bother looking up, but felt the wind from Sam and the evac landing behind her.

Sam was quick in assessing the damage. He picked you up and carried you to the quinjet, getting you stabilised for the trip back. Wanda thanked the gods that it would be a short trip.

She hoped you would be okay.

----------

Technically, it wasn’t the worst injury someone had come back from a mission with. Tony always came back with multiple contusions, sometimes broken bones if he had been careless. Natasha and Clint were always a mess, having been absorbed in trying to keep the other safe. Hell, you had come back with worse injuries.

So why this one had taken so much out of you, Wanda had no idea. All she knew was that it had been four days and you were still unconscious. Even the doctors couldn’t understand why you hadn’t woken up. Sure, trauma could keep someone in a coma, but you had seen much worse. So why this one?

“Time for food.”

Bless that man.

Wanda looked up from her book to see Clint leaning in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. A signature look for him, she realised. But she noticed, strangely enough, that he did not come with food. Extremely rude.

“Making me scavenge for myself now?” Wanda teased as she closed her book.

“You could say that,” Clint shrugged. “You gotta get out of here for a few hours, Wanda.”

So that was his purpose.

“Not yet,” she answered simply.

“They haven’t woken up yet, won’t wake up while you’re gone.”

“You don’t know that-”

“-Wanda,” Clint interrupted, “they’re not waking up. Get some food, take a shower, maybe a nap. It’ll be fine.”

She looked over to you and just stared. Your face hadn’t really changed since they had gotten you back to SHIELD. No sounds, no movement, nothing. Maybe there was a new crinkle between your brows, but nothing to really indicate you were going to wake up. No matter how much she wanted you to.

Damn you for making her worry about you of all people.

And damn Clint for being right.

“Two hours.”

“Make it five,” Clint shot back, a smile tugging at his lips.

“Three.”

“Four.”

Damn him.

“Fine. Four. But not a minute more,” Wanda sighed. But, and she hated to admit this, Clint was right; she needed some time to recover. She hadn’t even left herself recover from the mission, instead coming straight to the medical ward with you.

Clint nodded once and waited for her to leave before heading into your room. Sweet of him to take her place while she was resting. It would at least give her some respite to know that someone was watching you while she was gone. Now she just needed to take care of herself and get back.

Well. Maybe after a bath.

----------

“Wanda wake up!”

Not the best way for anyone to wake up from a nap.

Wanda shot up out of bed and tried to blink the sleep out of her eyes. She was sure she looked like an absolute mess, and she could feel the knots in her hair. Oh god she felt terrible. Two hours was not enough time for a recovery nap. They better have a good reason for waking her up.

“Good, you’re up,” Clint huffed from the doorway. “Y/N’s gone.”

Okay. Pretty good reason.

She didn’t bother brushing her hair; didn’t even bother changing into clean clothes. It was fine though, she had slept in her mission clothes anyway. What was one more day, right? Besides, it gave her a bit of comfort that she at least wouldn’t be running through the hallways half-naked.

It was, for lack of a better word, pandemonium in the halls. The assumption was that everyone was looking for you; and that assumption was correct. If you hadn’t been such a damn nuisance to SHIELD in the past, maybe they would’ve just let you go.

So really, this was all your fault.

But that didn’t stop Wanda from making her way to where she felt she knew you had gone. There was no proof, but it was a feeling. A feeling that was similar to when she had known whenever Pietro had gotten into trouble. Not quite as strong, because nothing could beat twintuition, but it was still there.

And it was right.

Wanda didn’t know what to really expect you to look like after a few days of rest. But you looked a mess sitting in the dark cell. You were still in your hospital gown, and the gauze was still wrapped around whatever wounds you had sustained. The worst part? You sat curled up in the corner.

“Y/N?” Wanda stepped closer to the cell, but was met with a beeping sound that she was terrifyingly familiar with.

A proximity bomb.

She jumped back and waited for the explosion that never came. Instead, the beeping stopped, and you continued to sit in the corner. Her eyes searched for the bomb, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to find it. If you had hidden it, then you would be the only one who could get to it.

“Everyone is looking for you,” Wanda whispered, just loud enough for you to hear.

“Leave me alone.” Your voice was hoarse, and you let out a series of painful-sounding coughs.

“They’re worried about you.”

“They can worry about themselves,” you shot back, “I’m fine.”

“Y/N,” Wanda urged. She didn’t like seeing you like this. She hadn’t cared for you much, hadn’t even liked you, but this… this wasn’t you. “What happened?”

And then you turned. She could see the bruises on your face, the bags under your eyes, a look on your face that she couldn’t quite place. But your eyes��� your eyes pierced through her soul in a way she hadn’t thought possible.

“You fucking heroes happened,” you replied, your eyes never leaving hers. “Couldn’t fucking leave well enough alone, had to bring me into all this fucking mess.”

“Y/N-”

“You wanted me in this fucking cell, now I’m here.” Wanda could tell you were running out of breath. “So leave me the fuck alone.”

With that you turned and stared back at the wall, your back to her. She couldn’t go to you, couldn’t help you. That bomb of yours would blow the both of you up if she got closer. And she just knew you were finished talking to her. You had made your decision, and she would just have to accept it. It seemed the team was right.

You would never be one of them.

[shadow-assassin-blix]

Parent Trap

Part 1

A/N: It’s here yall. The Marcus Moreno x Reader Parent Trap AU. There are some swears. Some point of view switching but I note it in bold. 

‘Thoughts’ “Speak” 

The Hero:

Marcus Moreno was in the middle of meeting with the Heroics. Going over assignments, and potential threats to be on the lookout. He was listening to Miracle Guy talk about something ridiculous when his cellphone went off. He glanced down, and his eyes widen in surprised. It was Missy’s school.

He quickly answered it, saying, “Hello?”

“Hello, Mr. Moreno? This is Principal O’Shaughnessy. If you could please come down to the school, as soon as possible. There’s been an incident involving your daughter and two other students,” Came an older male voice.

“I’m on my way,” Marcus got up and rushed out, not caring that he left in the middle of a meeting.

The Artist:

Y/N Graves was a simple woman. She worked as artist, which meant she was often home, elbow deep into whatever project she was working on currently. That was where she was when her phone rang.

She dropped her paint brush to answer it with a cheery, “‘Ello?”

“Miss Graves, this is Principal O’Shaughnessy, your daughter Artemis? Was involved in an incident at school with two other students. If you could please come as soon as possible,” Came a man’s voice.

“Be there soon,” She hung up, quickly cleaning her brushes before she left.

She hopped into her car and drove to the school; thankful it was only a couple blocks away. She made her way inside and to the principal’s office. She stops short when she sees her daughter standing near another little girl, with long curly black hair and dark eyes. Before noticing the third kid, a boy, who was sitting in a plastic chair, with a black eye and tissues up his nose to stop the bleeding.

“What the fu—frick?” She whispered taking in everything with slight horror.

Artemis giggled softly at her almost swearing. She goes to say something to her when she felt someone crash into her from behind. She stumbled forward trying to regain her balance. She turned around to yell but stopped.

“Marcus?” She asked staring at a face she hadn’t seen in years.

“Shade?” He parroted calling her by her nickname, one she hadn’t heard in years.

She then asked, “Please tell me that one is not yours,” pointing at the boy.

“No. The other one behind you,” Marcus said with a chuckle.

Before they could say much more a woman with dyed hair, lululemons and a tank top came in, her voice high-pitched with outrage at the sight of her kid.

“What happened to my baby!?” She screeched out.

The Principal cleared his throat at that time, to gain everyone’s attention. Shade moved over to stand by her daughter, as Marcus did the same.

“Mrs. Delaney, it appears that your son was bullying, Miss Moreno here. Miss Moreno tried to walk away from him several times, but your son continued to follow her, and even began shoving her. That was when Miss Graves stepped in, and punched your son,” Mr. O’Shaughnessy explained reading off an incident report.

“Or at least that was what stated from the teacher’s watching. Miss Moreno, would you like to tell us what happened?” He directed his attention to Marcus’ daughter.

“Tommy was teasing me about not having active powers. He kept saying mean things like ‘oh your dad must be disappointed in having a lame daughter.’ And stuff like that. I tried to walk away from him several times, but he wouldn’t leave me alone. Artemis came over and told him to go away. When he didn’t, she punched him, telling him to leave me alone,” Missy recounted staring at the ground.

“What lies! My Tommy would never! I hope you plan on punishing them!” Mrs. Delaney exclaimed angrily.

Shade rolled her eyes to the high heavens and stared at this dramatic woman, pointedly.

“My daughter defended her friend. Against a bully. If anyone should be punished, it should be your kid. It’s not our fault you raised an ass,” Shade sassed, crossing her arms.

Mrs. Delaney gasped in exaggerated horror, even going so far as to covering her son’s ears. The girls giggled quietly at her, and Marcus was trying not to laugh.

“Mrs. Graves, if you could please refrain from the foul language. Mrs. Delaney, I have warned you multiple times about Tommy’s behaviors. This is the last straw. He will be suspended for 2 weeks. As for Miss Graves, seeing as this is your first offense, you will get a warning. I do not tolerate fighting on school grounds, got it?” Mr. O’Shaughnessy cut in.

Mrs. Delaney grabbed her son, muttering something ‘I have never..’  and left.

The kids still have a couple hours left of class, but the principal gave them permission to leave early if they wished. The girls went and got their bags and whatever assignments they were going to miss for the day. Marcus and Shade stood outside by the entrance waiting for them.

The Kids:

Missy looked over at Artemis and asked, “So. You saw our parents act weird when they saw each other right?”

Artemis nodded as she grabbed her jacket and bag. “They clearly know each other. Did you see the way they looked at each?”

“All goo-goo eyed? Yes! I haven’t seen my dad look like that since…” Missy trailed off, thinking in her head, ‘since before my mom passed away.’

Artemis, who had made fast friends with Missy when she moved here a month ago, knew what she was thinking of. Artemis reached out and held her hand, giving it a small squeeze. Missy smiled at her in response and the 2 of them walked out to their parents.

Artemis looked at her mom and Missy’s dad and got an idea, “Mom, can we go get ice cream? I know that fighting is bad and all, but I was defending my friend.”

Her mom sighed, and looked at the two of them, with squinting eyes. She turned to Missy’s dad and said, “What do ya think? Think they’ve earned a treat?”

The Hero:

He looked at the kids and then back at Shade, who had a soft smile. “Sure. Why not?”

The girls cheered and rushed to the cars. “Uh. Pops on 15th St. sound good?” He asked.

“That place still exists? Damn,” Shade chuckled looking off to the side. “Uh. Yeah. Pops sounds good to me. See ya there in a minute.”

Marcus smiled, lightly biting his lip before making his way to his car, as Shade did the same.

Missy was already in the backseat, buckled up and ready to go. The drive to Pops was a quick 10 minutes, and as they made there way inside, they noticed Shade and Artemis hadn’t arrived yet, so they took a seat in a booth. Missy insisted that she sit on the outside, and Marcus complied with a shake of his head.

He heard the door opened and looked up to see Shade standing there and he was thrown back to all the times he took her here on a date. She was still just as beautiful as he remembered her.

The Artist:

As Shade stepped inside, she was hit with a wave of nostalgia. Pops still looked the same as it did when she was a teenager. She finds Marcus easy enough; he too looked a little dazed at being back here.

Her and Artemis go to join them, Artemis insisting to sit on the outside as well. Shade rolled her eyes and allowed it this one time.

The waitress came up and took their orders. 15 minutes passed and soon 4 milkshakes, 2 large and 2 kids sized in to-go cups, were set in front of them. The girls grabbed theirs and ran off to sit at another table, giggling.

“I feel like we are being set-up,” Shade whispered with a raised eyebrow.

“Possibly,” Marcus agreed, before clearing his throat.

“So. How.. How have you been?” He asked awkwardly.

“Been pretty good. I see you’ve been busy,” She quietly teased nodding to his wedding ring.

“Oh! Um. Yeah. But… uh… not,” He stammered trying to respond.

Shade gave him a look of sudden realization, “How long?”

“About 6 years. Cancer,” He answered lowly not wanting Missy to hear.

“I’m sorry to hear that. I bet she was wonderful,” She said with a sad smile.

“She was. Umm. Ahem. What about you? Ever get married or got someone special waiting at home?” he asked trying to redirect the attention off of him.

“Nope. Uh. Had a boyfriend for a couple years. He left the day I told him I was pregnant. So. It’s been just the 2 of us ever since,” Shade explained after taking a long sip from her milkshake.

“Then he didn’t deserve either of you,” Marcus replied, his voice soft.

Shade smiled, looking down to hide her face.

She cleared her throat and noticed out of the corner of her eye, Missy and Artemis were watching them intently.

“Marcus… I think our kids are trying to set us up,” She muttered. “Glance over at them casually.”

Marcus does so and sees the two of them trying to act nonchalantly but were very much keeping an eye on them.

He chuckled, “No. They’re just.. Concerned. They’re best friends who want to make sure we get along.”

“Mh. I don’t know. My kid can be quite devious. Her favorite movie is The Parent Trap. Well. Next to The Mummy,” Shade wasn’t convinced.

Marcus laughed at that and stared at her softly.

“Not gonna lie… I’ve missed you,” Marcus admitted.

“I missed you as well. Maybe um.. Maybe we can set up a day to catch up?” Shade offered hopeful.

“I’d like that, maybe Saturday? We can leave the kids with my mom for the day. We can… go to the park or that café you like so much? Well. If you still like it that is,” Marcus rambled slightly.

“I do. Sounds like a date,” Shade said confirming the idea.

They exchanged numbers and finished their shakes, before rounding up their kids.

She waved goodbye to him as they parted ways.

Artemis was bouncing up and down in her seat.

“Clearly, you are having a sugar overload, guess we need to work that off,” Shade stated, shaking her head.

“No. Just happy. How do you know Mr. Moreno, mama?” Artemis asked as they began to drive off.

“We dated in high school, and through a good portion of college,” Shade explained glancing back at her through the rear-view mirror.

“Oh. Why did you break up?” Artemis asked curiously.

“He was becoming a pretty famous Heroic and I was making a name for myself in the art field. We drifted. We hardly ever saw each other and when we did, we argued a lot. So, we figured it was better if we broke up,” Shade acknowledged with a sad sigh.

“But… you still like him? And he clearly likes you?” Artemis questioned, looking confused.

“Yes. I do still like him, and how do you know he likes me?” Shade countered with a grin.

“He stared at you like Rick does when he sees Evy,” Artemis said matter of factly, referencing The Mummy.

Shade laughed at how seriously she said that. ‘Kids.’

The Hero:

Missy looked at her dad and smiled at the dreamy face he was making.

“You like her?” Missy asked with a silly smile.

“I do. Does that bother you? Me liking someone?” Marcus asked worriedly.

“Dad. I don’t think mom would be mad if you moved on. I just want you to be happy. You work so much to make me happy and when you’re not with me, you’re saving the world. I think you deserve to be happy too,” Missy assured hugging him.

“When did you get so smart?” He asked, returning the hug.

“I learned from you, duh,” She answered cutely.

“Now you’re just sucking up. C’mon. Let’s go home. I have a lot of explaining to do for running out in the middle of a meeting,” Marcus said as the two of them hopped into the car.

“Also. I hope you know… I have never been disappointed in you not having active powers. You’re my daughter and I love you so much. Your power is far more special than being able to fly or run fast.” He mentioned looking back at her.

Missy nodded her head muttering, “I love you too. Thank you.”

The Kids:

That night, Missy and Artemis texted one another, concocting a plan to get their parents together. Their plan was slightly devious, but it was their parents own good. They just hoped it would work.

[smallstoriesiwrite]

The Dragon and her Knight

a/n: before I start this. This will be my first time writing a short story that I thought of. So please help with feedback!as well! its very long! its been awhile since i wrote something like years so please bear with me! remember yall are loved!

Tenya x Female!reader 

“We will be family day tomorrow remember tell all your family to come so we can all get to know each other.” Aizawa said

All the class groans

“Hey I'm just the messenger. Principle Nezu requested it for Class 1-A. So please bring your families. And I understand if some can’t make it. But please request they come. Okay class is over for today. Remember to call to see if they are coming and that it’s all day. Class dismiss”

Everyone started packing up when Shoji approached Y/N.

“Hey y/n you excited for tomorrow?”

“Honestly Sho I am. You will get to see my 3 older siblings and my parents again! They are always so busy with the agency we never see eachother.my father is even taking the day off.”

“That’s amazing! I would love to meet your parents again!”

You smile remembering how Shoji met your parents when you fell ill during Flu season and your family came and visited you while Shoji took care of you.

While walking towards the door someone bumped into you hard as you fell to the floor.

“Y/N?! Are you okay?” Shoji asked while helping you up

“Yeah Im fine sho now who the fuck bumped into me that hard ?”

“I must have not seen you there L/N. I figured because you're not up to my level?” Iida said.

“Guess who still hasn't learned how to fix that cursing problem you have L/N? Even as kids you used to curse like a sailor. You really have no manners do you?”

Smirking you said

“I may have a cursing problem Iida. But god knows I don’t have a stick up my ass now do I? And from what I hear you're just mad from your actions.”

“Now why would I be mad?”

“My family is all coming tomorrow and your precious rich daddy can’t take a day off of work now could he?” You say tauntingly

“For your information all my family is coming along tomorrow as well. Even my brother.”

“Ah the laid back Iida is coming too! Wow must be an accomplishment?! Here let me give you the pity award” You say sarcastically

Tenya growled and walked away while saying

“See your family tomorrow L/N. Tomorrow will be an interesting day.”

You rolled your eyes and walked to your dorm with Shoji.

“Tell me why again you and Tenya are always at each other’s throats about y’all’s family’s? “ Shoji says

“You see love. Me and Iida grew up together and were the best of friends. We did everything together from helping both of our older brothers with their suits to eating family dinners together. “ you say while arriving at your dorm and unlocking it

“Our older brothers were best of friends and so did my sister and brother got along with Iidas older brother. We were always neck in neck in school and Quirk power. Until one day my older brother Kyo (I’m just gonna name the siblings and if that’s your name I’m so sorry😭) was top of his class and was beating Iidas brother in both hero work and school wise. It was never more than a friendly rivalry between them but our families took it seriously. Iidas family found out that Kyo was excelling faster than Tensie. And surely enough my brother graduated top of his class and knowing how to control his quirk.”

Going into your dorm you set your backpack down and Shoji did the same. Starting to change into normal clothes while shoji did as well. It was so common for shoji left clothes because he always slept over.

While changing you continued

“So when graduation came along both of our families decided to have dinner with each other before having our own big parties  separately. While eating dinner at Kyos and Tensies favorite restaurant our families started to compare our brother's work and every time they tried to one up each other until finally Iidas' family said “You know what? Our sons don’t need to hang out with your kind. We are better than you all and our Agency and money proves it. You don’t have enough money to raise 4 Children! Ha you guys are low lives we will never associate with again.” According to Kyo, Athena and Laxus

Tensie defended us and tried to apologize but it didn’t slide with my parents. We left and ever since we have been rivals. We were never the richest like them. We worked for our big agency. My father and Kyo run the Agency.

It has been a rivalry between us as well. That’s why I study for long hours and as well practice my Quirk with Kyo Athena and Laxus when they come around to visit or present. They all graduated top number one. I want to do that as well.

Iida is just a reminder from my past that tamiles like them exist. They are born into riches while we work for ours. I can never forgive his family for what they said to mine. You know how much I love them. My family is everything to me. We might have arguments and disagreements about my future and the agency but at the end of the day they are my headache to deal with and honestly I don’t mind.” You say smiling and looking at Shoji

“But you do remember that time you lost a dare and kissed Tenya that one night I thought for sure you were over this rivalry. I swear every time I bring it up-“

You cut him off by throwing a pillow at him

“STOPPPPPP WE DON'T TALK ABOUT IT! IT WAS A STUPID DARE IT MEANT NOTHING!!!”

He laughs and says

“SUREEEE you came back a squealing mess and so unsure of your feelings that night to my room.”

I sighed and looked at the grown

“You know I can’t love him. My family wouldn’t approve and you know they are my world.”

“But n/n you need to realize that it’s your future. And your love. You love him don’t you.”

Sadly nodding

“I do. But he hates me. He doesn’t see me as a potential lover. He sees me as a rival he needs to crush because his family says so. My family wanted me to have that mentality as well. But for the love of fuck we held hands growing up and he gave me flowers because he thought it would go pretty un my hair.”

You say while walking to a small box of memories and pulling up photos of Tenya and you as children and dried flowers you pressed.

“I’ll just love from afar Sho.”

He nods and pulls you into a warm hug.

“Remember bestie I’m here for you. Anytime anywhere and if I have to knock some sense into Iida when he’s mean to you. Even if I don’t like hitting my classmates I will do it for you.”

Hugging tighter you said

“Thank you really bestie thank you.”

“Now let’s get to studying. We need to review for next week's test. But we can listen to music and dance around as well.” You said smiling while pulling away from the hug

Shoji nods and grabs his work while you turn up the music.

——time skip to next day brought to you by my raging headache and wanting to eat as well my spelling errors——���————-

“Hey y’all made it!” You said running towards your family

“Hell yeah we did we miss your stupid face!” Laxus said while hugging you

“Haha I miss your dumb face as well.”

You said while pulling away from the hug

“Hi mom hi dad “ you said smiling and hugging both

“Hi my love, how are you? Are you eating well? Not forcing yourself too much are you? And Shoji, where is he?” Mom said in a hurry

“Women, she will never understand you. Calm down, I'm sure they are fine. Right love?” Dad says

“Yes dad I am, don't worry mom I’m okay I’m healthy and breathing no I’m not giving myself too much and Shoji is just with his parents In his room before we meet up in class for the activities.” I say while looking over to see Athena and Kyo walking our way.

“Tell me again you sleep deprived child why are we here again? Family day was eject a thing back when we went to school” Kyo said while leaning into a hug

“Nice to see you too Kyo and I don’t know honestly. Guess to get closer. Dawg we've been through so much shit together as a class I think In principle eyes we need to like to know each other on a deep level I guess.” You say while pulling away

“Well beats me honestly it gives us time to relax with you and spend time with our small child we raised now come here and give your sister a hug.” Athena said while giving you a bone crushing hug

“Look at her now she was Bitching the whole way saying she was hungry and didn’t want to relive her U.A. memories. Now she’s hugging you.” Kyo said while wrapping his arm around Laxus.

We all laughed when we heard

“I see you still have a cursing problem L/N. You haven’t changed since U.A.” Tenie said

“Well you see Engine arms we love to keep it real with the family and no filter who do we need to please with our manners? Now you can just simply ignore our “vulgar language”now can you?” Kyo said tauntingly

There was a dead silent between them when Tensie said

“I’m just fucking with you Kyo. How you been, haven’t seen you in months brother.” Tensie said while hugging Kyo laughing.

“I’ve been good! traveling to America for hero work and Singapore. How are you?”

“Even since the accident I’ve been in my wheelchair but I’m still helloing the old man with work at the agency. Mister and Misses L/n hope you guys are well. “ Tensie said

My parents simply nodded there head with a straight face

“The Devil Dragon herself. How are controlling your powers going?” Tensie said to me

“I’ve gotten better. Athena has shown me ways to control them better and so has Laxus and Kyo at times.”

“Now that’s good! I say take better points from Athena. They don’t give her that name for nothing. Now do they?” Tensie says flirty to Athena like who simply rolled her eyes and said

“ in your dreams Iida” while smirking

“Ah so I’ll dream of it tonight.” Tensie said and laughed

Which left Athena a blushing mess

Before Tensie can talk again I hear

“Son, why did you wander off again?! We told you to meet us at the Classroom.”  Mister Iida said while approaching us

“Yeah Tensie, we thought you got lost?” Tenya said as well

“I'm a fine father. I was just saying hello to Kyo and his family. And how could I get lost Tenya I came here to school. I can only go so far with my wheelchair.” Tensie said

Our family locked eyes and said

“Ah The L/N family I’m so surprised they let you children come to this school after your first son.” Mister Iida said

“Well I have you know Iida, my daughter and Son graduated top number one in their class as well. And our last daughter is not too far behind. I hear from Eraser that she’s number one in her class. And her Quirk is more lasting and controlling than anyone’s” my father said while stepping up

“You see Tenya isn’t too far behind and I’m positive he will beat your daughter. And her devil form.” Mister Iida said while giving me a side eye

I rolled my eyes and grabbed my dads hand

“Come on dad. Let’s go do the activities and see around.”

“Okay love let’s go.” He said not even saying nothing to the Iidas while I spoke up to Tenya

“Keep your father on a damn leash or i'll send him to a nursing home.” While bumping into him harshly

[time skip]

After a day of fun activities and hanging out with Shoji and his parents everyone decided to meet up in class to have the introduction part over with.

While everyone introduced their family my name came up.

“Y/n your turn “ Aizawa said

While dragging my parents and siblings up there I said

“Hey guys you know me Y/N I am the youngest of 4. There is my brother Kyo you may know as “The Fire Dragon” he is the oldest. Then there is Athena who y’all may know as “The Wind Dragon” who is second oldest. Then there is Laxus who you may know as “The Thunder dragon” and lastly me who happens to be “the devil dragon” us 4 beautiful babies came from our mother Lilac and our father Ivan. Together we all run Dragon Slayer Industry. Any questions?”

Someone spoke up and said

“Why does your name end with dragon?”

Kyo spoke up and said

“When we activate our Quirk our facial features slowly change into a dragon form. We saw that in the patterns of myself maturing into my Quirk along with everyone. You see, our cheek has scales at times when we use our quirk and Wings as well but only if we are fully using our powers. It differs for Y/N tho. Due to the fact her transformation is more lengthy and more levels towards her dragon form. She posses our strongest form of Dragon Slayer which is Devil power.”

I looked down and smiled when my dad speaks up

“She’s the youngest of our 4 children but we love her as much as we love our 3 eldest. They all happen to be our pride and Joy of Dragon Slayer industry.”

We all look up and dad and he gave us a soft smile

After everyone introduces their families and explains their quirks, Principle Nezu stands on Aizawas shoulder and speaks.

“All of the Families and students meet up in the common room of The dorm we are having karaoke night with the families!”

Me and Athena locked eyes and smiled

While Kyo and Laxus groaned and sat their heads on both mine and Athena's shoulders.

“Awwww what’s wrong Lawx? You don’t wanna perform?” I say while scratching his head

“No, because we don’t sing well, you and Thena always sing better than us.” He mumbled into my shoulder

“I mean that’s true but we know our old school songs don’t we Laxus?” Kyo said optimistically while wrapping his arms around Athena's neck

“You guys legit screamed Drivers License with me and Y/n when it came out. What makes y’all think y’all can’t sing?” Athena says while getting up and following the crowd to the common room.

“Did you really sign the driver's license with your sister Kyo?” Tensie said while his family behind him

“Hell yeah I did. It’s manly to scream with your sisters in the car about a breakup song. And I love them too much as well.” Kyo said proudly

“AWWWWWW you love us?!” Me and Athena gushed

“Shut up you guys” kyo says while pushing us

We both laughed and look at tensie

“What song are you planning to sing?” Athena asked

“Well hopefully a duet with my brother but if not if you want I can do a duet with you?” Tensie said

Athena blushed and mumbled

“Yeah sure.”

I smiled and quickly looked at Tenya who was just smiling at his brother and kept quite along with his parents.

“Are y’all planning to all sing together at least one song? “ Tensie ask us

“HELL YEAH WE ARE! “Laxus yelled happily

“We already have a song in mind. We relate to it too much so we might sing that one!”

We all nodded in agreement and arrived at the common room. It was big enough for the karaoke machine that was hooked to the t.v.

We all sat down Iidas family not far from us and Shoji's family right near us. Me and Shoji smiled and shared snacks while everyone performed.

So many performances went on From Sero and Ojiro performing

To me and my siblings

To Tensie and Tenya

Me and Shoji as well

And even Tensie and Athena

To even Bakugo surprisingly

Everything was coming to a end when Mina requested After her song finish

“I request Y/N and Iida do a song together to close it off!”

“WHAT?!” Tenya and I screamed

“Yes, that would be an amazing idea!!!” My sister stated

“We second that!” My brothers and Tensie said

All the class started agreeing and even there parents while I looked back at mine and Tenyas parents

“Love. It’s all up to you, we won't be mad at you if you do.” My mom stated

My father was about to say something when kyo covers his mouth

“Go sis. It’s okay. Right old man.” He said forcefully

I sighed and got up and said

“Well are we doing this or not engine legs?”

Tenya nodded and got up as well while we headed to the small stage and we looked at eachother and sighed.

“What song are we gonna do?” Tenya asked quietly

“Well I don’t know we can pick random-“ before I can finish the sentence Tensie and Athena walked up and said

“We already have a song in mind. Here this one” Tensie pointed to “Beauty and the Beast and before you say no one we won’t let you leave so do it good” Athena said smiling and walk off with Tensie

“Let’s get this over with Engine legs. I'm sleepy.” I say while pressing play

The music starts

I sing

Tale as old as time

True as it can be

Barely even friends

Then somebody bends

Unexpectedly

I look at Tenya and he smiled and turned to me

Just a little change

Small to say the least

Both a little scared

Neither one prepared

Both of us at the same while looking at each other

Beauty and the Beast

Ever just the same

Ever a surprise

Ever as before

And ever just as sure

As the sun will rise

Ever just the same

Tenya singed and looked into the crowd

And ever a surprise

Both while Turning to the crowd

Ever as before

While I sing sweetly

And ever just as sure

As the song goes on we became more emotional and more one with the song

Both looking into eachothers eyes and singed

Bitter-sweet and strange

Finding you can change

Learning you were wrong

We scooted closer together

While still singing Tenya puts his hand on my cheek which makes me melt Into his hands and forget anyone was watching. I felt that the world stopped while looking into his blue beautiful eyes.

Tale as old as time

Song as old as rhyme

Beauty and the Beast

Beauty and...

Beauty and the Beast

Singing the last note, Tenya pulled me into a kiss.

It wasn’t a dominant kiss, it was more of a passionate and tender kiss.

Happily kissing back we sadly pulled back for air and realized we were around people.

I turn to see my siblings clapping and jumping around and my mom's smiling face and my dad's soft stern look.

To Tensie clapping and hugging Athena and Iidas parents' shock.

Finally I pulled away from Tenyas grip when I felt being pulled off the stage by Tenya. Dragging me to an empty room.

“Wait Iida what are you doing? Dude let me go” I say while struggling to get out his grip when finally we stopped in an empty study room.

“I'm sorry I pulled you away. It was too much commotion for me to speak to you in private.” Tenya says while looking down

“Why did you kiss me?”

He stayed silent

“Tenya, why did you kiss me?” I say softly

He chuckles and says softly

“I haven’t heard you say my name in years. I forget how smoothly it came off your lips.”

Smiling sadly I grabbed his face and looked at him.

“Huh yeah it’s been awhile hasn’t it. But really why did you kiss me? I understand if it was in the moment and not meant-“

“Wait, you think I didn’t mean it?!” Tenya says with panic in his eyes

“Well with the rivalry and the mean comments and just brutal training against each other  at times I would never think you would like me or even kiss me.”

“I understand where you're coming from but I need to assure you that I do care for you. Even after the stupid and inconsiderate comments my parents said years ago. I never stopped caring for you. This rivalry is so dumb. if I see Tensie falling in love with Athena. Why can't I do the same.” Tenya says

“Wait, you love me?”

“I always have. Since the day we met when Kyo and Tensie had a group project and you came over with Kyo to my house. I remember your beautiful c/e looking so afraid and didn’t want to leave Kyo’s lap because you only knew him. And while I tried to persuade you to come and play with me in the garden I remembered I overheard your mom say your favorite flower was f/f and lucky for us we had it in the garden. I begged my mother to cut the smallest flower there was.” He smiles and continues

“I grabbed the flower carefully and ran back to Tensei's room where you and Kyo were. I sat next to Kyo and I saw your eyes light up in the sight of the flower. I asked if I can put it in your hair and you nodded and I said-“

“It looks beautiful. If you come outside with me we can make a beautiful flower crown for a princess like you.” We say in sink

“You remembered” I say softly

“I always have.” Tenya said

“What do we do now? We both like each other and just want to be happy with each other. Without our parents at our throats.” I say

“Come.” Tenya says while holding my hand

We both ran to the common room and saw nobody and I looked to see that both of our family’s were in my dorm room. I tugged Tenya and pointed to my family. He quickly dragged me with him and while we approached our families we heard our fathers argue.

“If your daughter hadn't come to this school Tenya would be number one!”

“Oh please that is so not true and you know that. Your son wouldn’t be number one even if my own daughter wasn’t here. She got so many recommendations to come here like Endeavor's child!”

While they argued I see our mothers knock on my door

“Y/n sweetie please open the door. We know you're in there with Tenya.” My mom says

“Y/n its okay me and your mother are not mad. Tenya please convince Y/n to open the door.” Tenyas mom said

I see on the floor crouching down my brothers and sister along with Tensie who seemed to be calling our phones. And I remember I left my phone on my bed.

“Mom, I'm right here.” I say

I see my family look at me and Tenya holding hands.

“Oh thank god. We thought you locked yourself in your room.” Athena said while getting up and hugging me

“Oh no I just left my phone on my bed. I just talked to Tenya for a bit and we want to talk to y’all actually.” I say while looking at my family and his.

“And before we go into my room. Please stop the fucking arguing this rivalry is gettin old. Of who’s better or not. Both of you men are reaching an old age, stop arguing and act normal. I will not tolerate it in my room. If y’all do I will spray you with my spray bottle that has water. Got it?” I say while unlocking my door

They nod and all pile into my room.

My siblings sat on my bed with Tensie next to them.

My parents and Tenyas parents sat on the couch I had.

After everyone settled in Tenya spoke

“I understand that this rivalry has affected me and y/n in many ways you wouldn’t understand. From me and Tensie losing our best friends to hating the idea of them succeeding. Tensie matured and became friends again with the y/n family and hell even fell in love with Athena. I always respect you father because you always knew better for me but this is my time to choose and I choose to be friends and more with Y/n.”

“I understand dad that you don’t like me associating with the family who made fun of us because of our wealth and status. And god knows I'm still upset but it was never Tenyas nor Tensei's words. Even misses Idas words. And I know it gives you rage and anger seeing with the son of the man who made fun of us. But dad. Im old enough to choose who to associate with. I know mom is okay with it. But I want you to be okay with this as well. I'm not asking you to forgive them this instant. But please work with Tenya and Tensie they are trying to make amends.” I say with tears in my eyes

“Father. I love her.”

‘Dad I love him.”

We say together

Our father look at us and each other and sighed

“Darling I will try for you.” My dad says

“ I will as well.” Tenyas father said

I smiled and ran to hug my parents.

“Thank you really thank you” I say crying

My parents hugged me back and kissed my forehead

My sister pulled me from my parents grasp and threw me to my brothers who hugged me

“Look at this little devil dragon growing up it was just like yesterday you told us to shut the fuck up.” Laxus said

“If you dont let me breathe ill make sure you don’t have children you fucking dick” I say struggling to breath

When they let me go I see Tensie and Athena hold hands having there cute couple moment

I smiled and walk over to my record player and put the disc vinyl of Cage the elephant and

“Cigarettes Daydreams” played

I look to see my father dance with my mom

As well with Tenyas parents

With our siblings singing

Distracted in the moment i hear

“Can I have this dance” Tenya says

I smiled and slowly danced with him

“ We will make this work. I promise.” Tenya says

“We better. I know I didn’t kiss you as a dare for nothing.” I say while looking up at him

“I remember that kiss. You ran off to Shoji's room while I stood shocked and eventually went back to my dorm and overthink the kiss.”

We both laughed and that’s when I sing

“Soft speak”

“with a mean streak” Tenya singed

“Nearly brought me to my knees” we said softly as we danced to the rest of the song

Do do do do do do You can drive all night Looking for answers in the pouring rain You wanna find peace of mind Looking for the answer If we could find a reason, a reason to change Looking for the answer If you could find a reason, a reason to stay Standing in the pouring rain

[roseverdict]

sO ASK MEME

gf ut souls, google earth existed in 2012, gf will my chaos never cease, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA and I JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA 👀

also apparently I have 42 wips bc I didn't count mine and im,,,, yess

Some EXCELLENT choices >:D

"gf ut souls:" I don't have a lot for this one, but the gist was "what color souls would the Pines twins have." I have two potential colors for each of them, and as it turned out, there's not a lot of overlap between them. (also if tumblr mobile could let me pick more than just the limited colors i'm allowed that'd be GREAT)

dipper: bravery/perseverance

mabel: integrity/kindness

stan: determination/patience

ford: justice/perseverance

yes ford might be yellow. no i did not plan it that way. wkdjwdkdjdk

"google earth existed in 2012" was my shot at "ok but what if the world at large was aware of weirdmageddon" fic skdnsodnsldks. we'd follow dipper and mabel's parents as they spend the end of the summer in a panic and then just fkn BOOK IT once weirdmageddon ends and the falls are back to normal

"gf will my chaos never cease" is a fanfic of a fanfic. yall know "the invitation" by @3hobbitsinatrenchcoat? my brain tried to make me write "post-weirdmageddon, while stan's still got major memory issues, ford actually looks through stan's degrees and feels Regret™" fic. one day i might finish it. one day,,,,,

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" is another fanfic of a fanfic wodjsodnskdnsdk. i came across this fic on ao3 where stan wound up hosting a late night talk show, and ford finds it in the deepest depths of his paranoia, and after a while of listening and clinging to the one stable thing he has left, ford calls in and they have a heartwrenching heart-to-heart on the airwaves. the idea came from somewhere on tumblr that might've been st*nc*sty, unfortunately, however i'm stealing it for all of us in the anti-inc*st crew >:) i wanted to try giving a mostly-dialogue writing style a try, and, well…

"Alright, while I get this dust outta my eyes, let's hear from our second caller! Caller, you're live!"

"So. 'Sixer' and 'Knucklehead,' huh?"

A squeak and a crash from the host.

Weakly, "…hi, Sherm."

"'Hi, Sherm,' he says. You two haven't been calling like you said you would, and now you're co-hosting a radio show?! When was this?! Last I heard, neither of you wanted to contact the other for fear of-!"-

"WEEE DON'T NEED TO AIR OUR DIRTY LAUNDRY ON THE AIRWAVES."

A wheeze. "Holy shiiitake mushrooms, it's actually Sherm!"

"Darn right, it's me! Now fill me in, dangit! When did my baby brothers make up, and do I have to tell Ma and Pa?"

"DO NOT TELL PA, ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR GOURD-?!"

"Sherm, this whole thing is a relatively recent development and-"

"Whoa, slow down-!"

"-know what he'd say if he found out we were talking to each other again?! I can imagine it crystal-clear! He'd take one listen and-!"

"-I mean, Ma would probably like to know, but Pa isn't exactly happy with either of us, and you know as well as I do that he'll take in the evidence, reject what he doesn't like, and find a way to blame everything on Knucklehead, and we are not going through that again-!"

"-wait, wait, hold up, Sixer, what do you mean, Pa isn't-?!"

"Guys. GUYS. SLOW DOWN. GUYS."

"…what do you mean, Pa's not happy with you?"

"Remember what I told you about my studies, and how they've recently gotten to be too much for reasons I can't get into on the air?"

"…yeees?"

"I may have undersold it…by a lot. I was sleep-deprived when I first called in, but not because I got wrapped up in my studies. At least, not in the conventional sense. And…being that much of a mess isn't exactly conducive to making those millions Pa always wanted from us."

"…Forget Pa. Fo-Sixer, I'm on my way to your place now. You can explain things when you get back from-"

"Sherm, are you in the car right now?!"

"You can't go there, it's not safe, Sherm!"

"Says the man who lives there."

"I'm not kidding around! I'm currently with Knucklehead, and I intend to be up here for at least a few more days. As long as he's alright with it, you ought to come up and talk to us here, off the air and far, far away from what my studies have wrought!"

"Yeah, once Sherm's heart is set on something, it's gonna happen. Once the show's over, call the line again, alright? I'll give you the address then."

"…fine. But you two better not chicken out on me, got it?"

"Got it."

"You got it."

"Good. I'm going to hang up now, but I'll still have your show on, so don't think you've gotten rid of me."

"Wouldn't dream of it."

"Of course not."

"…I missed you two knuckleheads." Click.

"Aw, Sherm…"

"For what it's worth, we missed you too."

"Man, are we gonna make a habit of patching up old wounds on the radio? I'm not gonna make us stop, I just wanna know."

And then "I JUST HAD THE BEST IDEA" is that Portal!Ford in the massive multifandom crossover that's low-key rattling around in my brain 24/7, which I posted about here :D

[dokoni-mo]

Far Away, Together || Darth Vader x Reader (Chapter 7)

(A/N: this was origninally supposed to go up tomorrow, but it was another one of those cases where i was writing at night and this bad boy basically completed itself. Im very proud of this chapter and I hope yall like it just as much as I do!! It was really fun imagining all of the things and writing them down :))) as always, feel free to ask to be added to the taglist :)) and feel free to send me any asks of anything you wanna say/know. All previous chapters have been liked below :)) )

(P.S: i got kinda misty-eyed while writing this so be warned)

Chapter One: [x]

Chapter Two: [x]

Chapter Three: [x] 

Chapter Four: [x]

Chapter Five: [x]

Chapter Five and a Half: [x]

Chapter Six: [x]

WARNINGS: canon typical voilence, usage of weapons, cursing, mentions of being in the hospital, some angst, mentions of death, otherwise none!!

Key: (F/N) = first name, (L/N) = last name. 

Word Count: ~7900

~~~

The force that surrounded the room had told him that something here was undeniably wrong. It frustrated him that he couldn’t yet piece it together, and frustrated him further that the force wouldn’t tell him the answer. 

The look in your eyes when he accepted the king’s offer only fueled his sense of self-doubt and second-guessing. Even if you didn’t know it, your eyes told him that you had felt a sense of unease in the room as well, but weren’t able to pick up on it's source. Perhaps it was just your nerves. Perhaps it was just the nerves that he had left. 

Watching you be whisked away by those guards was one of the hardest sights he had to bear, but he had no idea as to why. He had wanted very desperately for you to stay by his side during that meeting, but the sense of your boredom was plaguing his mind, distracting him. He hated that he had put you in such a situation, and thought that it might be nice for you to be entertained for a short while. 

But, the force told a much different story. 

He pretended that the last glance you gave him over his shoulder didn’t shake him to his core and made his fists ball. His thoughts of worry were consuming him whole. He would never admit it to anyone, let alone himself, but deep down inside of him, he was scared. Scared that look was the last one he would ever get from you. Scared that look you gave him was the last time he would ever be able to see the life in your eyes. His fists were shaking in the sheer amount of strength he gripped them with. Self-loathing and worry filled his mind. 

He had lost so many in his life. 

Yet, for some odd reason that he could not place… 

He did not want to lose you too. 

In fact, deep, deep down inside of him… 

He knew that losing you would finally destroy him. 

It would shatter any semblance of humanity he had within him. 

Despite feeling this so strongly, he still had no idea why. 

You were just a mechanic from Endor… 

Why did he feel the need to see you every day? To speak to you every day? To keep you by his side? To protect you? 

He couldn’t begin to know. 

Once you were ushered out of the room and the doors closed behind you, the only noise that filled the space was the sound of his respirator, working to a T just like it always did. Almost too quickly, he reached out with the force, searching for the feeling of you. 

Sure enough, you were still there. Still alive and unharmed. Big shocker, since you had literally just left, but… 

He was… relieved. 

“Now, my Lord,” the King spoke, that idiotic smirk plasterd on his face, “where were we?” 

“We were discussing the terms of agreement to join the Empire.” Lord Vader spoke flatly, his mind still somewhere else. 

“Ah! Yes, of course!” the king responded. His voice was cheery. 

Too cheery. 

It was disgusting. Revolting. Yet Lord Vader had to push on, by order of his master.

Lord Vader sensed more guards enter the room without even having to turn his head. The muscles of his shoulders tensed as he felt their presence, causing his adrenaline to stir. 

Something was definitely off. But, he decided to ignore it. Surely they wouldn’t try anything. These creatures didn’t seem that idiotic as to try and go toe-to-toe with him. Yet still… his mind seemed to wander again and again to the thought of you. The thought of you somehow being in some sort of danger. Trying his best to attend to the matter at hand, he told himself that you were in good hands with the guards. But, why did it feel like a lie? Why did it feel wrong? He decided to explain these questions with only his nerves acting up, and nothing more. 

“So what exactly will be the, erm… benefits that my planet receives from the Empire, my Lord?” The king asked. Lord Vader barely even realized that he had said anything. 

“Your planet will become a base of empirical troops. They will replace your guards and police systems if you wish. Otherwise, they will be serving there strictly for the Empire. You will also be financially compensated for all the resources you give the Empire.” 

Maker, did Lord Vader hate conversing with potential allies like this. 

“Splendid!” the king exclaimed, clapping his clammy, wrinkled hands together. If Lord Vader hadn’t been wearing a mask, he would have rolled his eyes. 

The king then started to babble on and on about how he was so pleased with Lord Vader’s visit to his planet and how honored he was to be joining the Empire and blah blah blah blah blah. A wash of anger overcame Lord Vader as he was forced to listen to the old man blubber on and on and on. This is the part that he especially hated when mingling with potential Empire recruits. They always felt the need to suck up to him and to the Empire. Lord Vader wished that they would just cut to the chase and tell him how they really felt. 

Just like you did. All the time. 

Zoning out from the king’s still-ongoing rambles, Lord Vader’s mind began to drift again. His sense of worry was overtaking him once more, swallowing him whole. If he were not in that infernal, hellish suit that kept him alive, everyone would be able to see clear as day that he was not okay; that he was worried sick, that he was scared. However, the hard shell of his exterior, coupled with his large frame and tough aura made everyone think that there was no human within those layers of buttons, leather, and metal. There was no one capable of emotion or feeling within the depths of steel that covered the thing within. Granted, he was to appear this way to everyone by order of his master, and Lord Vader did obey his master’s command. However, deep down inside of him, for a very long amount of time, he hoped that someone could look at him and see a person, and not just the Empire’s most feared weapon. 

You had done that. 

And fuck was he worried about you. 

He couldn’t bear it any longer. He had to know that you were okay. That you were safe. 

Droning out the king’s still ongoing blubbering, Lord Vader focused all his attention on manipulating and bending the force around him. Focusing on your life force, he felt his shoulders tense as every fluid in his metal-clad body that was still left run cold. 

Your life force had diminished significantly. And, you were fading still.

His breathing hitched in his respirator. His fists were shaking in a flurry of passionate emotion.

No. 

No. 

No.

He would not allow this. 

Not caring at all about what the king had to say, Lord Vader cut him off mid-speech. 

“I wish for my mechanic to return to me at once.”

The king looked at Lord Vader like the sith had grown a second head as his majesty was silenced. The king swallowed thickly as he leaned his body to the other end of his hair, his hand wrapping around his chin as he rubbed it gingerly. 

There was no mistaking the emotion that glossed over his blue eyes. Lord Vader had seen it countless times before. 

Fear. 

Lord Vader’s anger was reaching a boiling point. 

“M-My Lord! But she has only just left! Surely you could allow her more time to-” the king tried to reason, only to be cut off again.

“I want her here now. Do not make me ask again.” 

No one made even the slightest movement after Lord Vader spoke. The air was silent except for the mechanical breathing coming from Lord Vader’s person. The aura that emanated from the room was crisp, full of anticipation. If one were to listen hard enough, one would potentially be able to hear the sweat dripping down the guard’s foreheads as they gripped their blasters tighter. A thick, yet undetectable to the untrained scent filled the air. Lord Vader knew the scent all too well. He had smelled it so often throughout the years. There was no mistaking it. 

Fear. 

Lord Vader’s anger filled every atom within his person. 

The king was the one to break the tension, clearing his throat. 

His tone was much lower than normal. Serious. 

“I’m… I’m afraid I can not do that-” 

Everything that happened next was so fast that everyone present had barely had any time to process it. Faster than lightning, Lord Vader had risen from his seated position, his chair launching back faster than a speeding blaster shot. Sensing the rage coming off of him, the guards in the room pointed their blasters at the sith lord and fired, the blue streaks of light illuminating the room in quick, pulsive flashes. Using the force to deflect away the bolts, Lord Vader took his saber off of his belt, igniting it in his grip.

Lord Vader deflected the bolts off of his lightsaber that continued to barrage him, sending them off in wild directions, striking a few guards and making them drop dead to the floor. White-hot, passionate rage burning inside him, Lord Vader swung his saber faster and stronger than he ever had before, the muscles in his arms rippling beneath his suit. A few other guards were caught in this flurry of anger and the brilliant crimson to match, their pieces now scattered on the floor. 

Sensing one last guard left alive, Lord Vader hurled his saber to the other side of the room, cutting the guard clean in half as well as a few decorations in its path. Watching the guard’s body fall dead to the ground, he sensed one last man trying to escape his fury. 

The king. 

His saber returning to his right hand, Lord Vader reached out his left hand to the king who was halfway out the door, beckoning the force to do the same. Bending to Lord Vader’s will, the force wrapped an invisible, large, strong hand around the king’s throat, immediately making him gasp for air. Feeling his feet leave the ground, the king was quickly and violently pulled by the force into Lord Vader’s grasp, his robotic hand wrapping tightly around his majesty’s royal throat. Darth Vader loomed oh so ominously above the king as he was held tightly in his grasp, the dark lord’s saber humming forebodingly in his other hand. The king was gasping and choking for air at this point, his eyes wide and filled to the brim with fear.

The king had thought he was staring death right in the face. 

And, he was. 

Desperately trying to get away, the king tried fruitlessly to kick at the sith, the soles of his boots leaving skids on the metal that adorned the dark lord’s body. Lord Vader didn’t care in the slightest. The only reason why he didn’t immediately kill that old man because only he knew the answer to what Lord Vader did care to know. 

The only thing that pumped through Lord Vader’s body at this point was burning, boiling, white-hot fury as he spoke to the king in his choke-hold, his voice oh so much more deep and constricting. 

“Where is she?” 

~~~

When you finally came-to, you instantly realized three things. 

One: your wrists were tied together, and there was a chain around your ankle.

Opening your eyes and feeling your body again, you had barely been able to feel these restraints at first. But as you began to stir, they became far more apparent. Grogginess lacing your mind, you were confused at first on why you weren’t able to rub your eyes. Looking down at your hands, you finally noticed the pair of metal restraints that were bound around your wrists, making you unable to move your hands freely. You were terribly puzzled at first, but quickly remembered that the guards had assaulted you, locking you in this room. Trying to move your feet, you felt a pull at your right ankle as you shifted and twisted. Looking down, you noticed a similar restraint to the one on your wrist keeping you chained to the floor, the chain only about one and a half foot long. 

Two: there was a pounding in your head. 

You were less challenged by coming up with an explanation to this one. Remembering the events prior to you blacking out, you figured that your pounding head was from when the guard struck you with the butt of his rifle. The aching feeling was in the same spot. Honing in on the sensation a moment longer, you noticed that it felt as if something was caked onto that side of your head. Your lips tightened into a line as you deduced what it was. 

Blood. 

Great. 

Three: you weren’t alone in that room anymore. 

Focusing your eyes to train on what was in front of your vision, you noticed three pairs of feet standing about five feet away from you, all adorned with pairs of boots. Recognizing them as no where near empirical standards, your brow furrowed. The symbol of the rebellion you saw… 

These were rebels. 

Not wanting to lie down on the cold ground any longer, you shifted your body so that you could roll onto your butt, and eventually sit on your knees. Your body sore from lying on that cold, hard ground for an unknown amount of time, you shot a glare upwards, hoping that it landed upon your rebel captors. 

Sure enough, it did, and you were greeted with two familiar faces, and one unknown one. The two you recognized were the guards who had brought you to this room. The one you didn’t know was smirking devilishly down at you, her hands on her hips as she looked at you like you were living filth. You were almost offended, but you remembered who exactly you worked for. You supposed that made her opinion more justifiable, since she was indeed a rebel. However, this did not stop you from glaring daggers right into her eyes, your lips in a slight scowl. 

“Well, look who finally decided to join the party!” the rebel woman said, crossing her arms over her chest. She was a bit of a more mature woman (about early to mid thirties), and had the medals on her coat to match her experience. You had no idea what rank she was. It was almost impossible to tell with rebel uniforms, since, well, they didn’t really have uniforms. You envied them for that. 

“It's not like I wanted to be here in the first place…” you mumbled out, your gaze dropping to the floor for a moment. 

Your quip must have angered the female rebel. She spoke through her teeth as she responded to you, her brow furrowing in frustration. 

“What did you say to me, empirical scum?” 

It was your turn to make your brow furrow, your wrists straining against the restraints. 

“What does it matter to you?! Let me go!” you bellowed, although you were almost certain that your demands were not going to be met. 

Your confirmation came seconds later after the woman let out a laugh. 

“No way, missy! We are nowhere near done with you yet.” 

You sighed quickly to yourself at this, your brow still furrowed in anger and frustration. 

“I don’t know how many times you’ve heard this before, but I won't tell you anything.” you retorted back, a smirk tugging at your lips at your not-so-subtle teasing. Although you didn’t exactly classify yourself as loyal to the Empire, you were still no fool as to get you on it's bad side. Furthermore, it was moreso him you were loyal to… 

Him. 

Lord Vader. 

The thought of his name made your mind start to spiral. Did he know you were there? Where was he? Would he come for you? Would he even bother to even ask where you were? Would he care if you were captured by this lady and held as a prisoner for the rest of your years? The times you remembered sharing with him on that damned planet said yes… But you were still worried nonetheless. Still scared. Perhaps it was just you being scared of being taken prisoner, but your mind started to feel with fears and doubts the longer you sat there on the floor. Unable to hide your worry, your eyes kept darting to and from the door, hoping to see a familiar sith-lord standing in it's frame. 

Noticing your wandering eyes, the rebel woman reached out and gripped the back of your hair, forcing you to look up at her as you winced. 

“What’s the matter?” she asked, her voice feigning concern, “Hoping that monster will come and save you? Don’t be fucking ridiculous.” The woman spat at you, violently letting go of your hair as she re-crossed her arms. 

“He’s… y-you’ll never get away with this.” you panted out, your voice stammering. Your mind still racing, you could barely hide any of your fear. 

The rebel woman tsked as she rolled her eyes. 

“Psh. Please. We’ve already got half the job done. We got Vader alone with our finest, and there’s no way he could take them all on at once-” 

You breathed out a laugh before she could finish. 

“Maker, you really are that dumb…” 

Scowling down at you, the woman cleared her throat as she continued. 

“We didn’t expect Vader to bring someone like you along with him. We expected some pilot or officer that we could just kill off. That was the original plan for you, missy…” 

You kept your gaze trained straight in front of you as the woman started to pace around you. 

“And by all accounts, it still is. Unless, you give us what we want.” 

You pursed your lips before speaking, “Which is?” 

“Information,” the woman hissed, leaning down to get in your ear, “We know who you are, (F/N) (L/N). You’re his mechanic. You know things.” 

You let out a scoff, “Look, as you said, I’m just a mechanic, lady. It’s not like I’m going to know valuable secrets to the Empire. You’re embarrassing yourself.” 

The woman looked up at the guards and nodded to them at your answer. Quickly, the same guard who had knocked you unconscious moved his arms, revealing to you a long, silver stick with a ring of electricity around one end, filing the room with it's sound. You licked your lips at the sight of this, your eyes darting to the door again. 

Please… don’t leave me behind, you thought to yourself as sweat started to form on your brow. 

“Does that jog your memory, mechanic?” the woman hissed. 

“No, not really. Because I don’t know-” 

You were cut off by your own loud groan of pain as the guard pressed the electrical end of the stick to your shoulder, sending volts of electricity through your veins and nerves. It was agony. You now understood why stormtroopers who patrolled the prison blocks said they still heard the screams at night. 

Removing the stick from your shoulder, you let your head dangle down as you closed your eyes, your brow still furrowed. You refused to show these people just how terrified you were. 

“How about now? How about you try telling us the plans for that super-weapon we’ve been hearing rumors about, hm?” the rebel woman asked, staring down at you with unforgiving eyes.

“I already told you no.” you hissed back at her. Passionate rage flooding through you, you glared back up at the woman, daggers in your eyes as you spoke with your teeth bared. How dare they do this to you. How dare they chain you up like some animal. How dare they knock you out then shock you. How dare they speak to you in such a way. 

But, most of all… 

How dare they trick you into leaving his side. 

Your voice cracked as your words flew from your lips, your eyes threading to spill over in tears of frustration. 

You were done. 

You didn’t realize how crazy you were going from your worrisome thoughts and anxieties of no one coming to save you as the words spewed from your mouth with absolutely no filter. 

“Is this how you expect to get anything out of anyone? Shock me to death?! Yeah, sure, that’ll make ANYONE wanna talk. Look, I’m not lying to you. I really don’t know any fucking secrets that the Empire has. I just fucking work there. You really think that all of this is gonna work? Think again, bitch. You put all your “finest” in that room with Lord Vader to DIE. They’re all going to DIE. And for what? For you to die too? To bully around some mechanic for a few minutes? You’re rebels, right? Is this really the example you wanna set? Chaining up some fucking mechanic who’s just here on this NOWHERE planet as a representative? GROW THE FUCK UP! All of you are so stupid- DO YOU NOT SEE WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN?! LORD VADER WILL COME HERE ANY MINUTE NOW AND KILL YOU ALL. HE WILL, I KNOW HE WILL. H-HE’S GOING TO COME FOR ME! I KNOW HE WILL! I-” 

You didn’t even feel the hot tears running down your furiously contorted face as you screamed at the woman. You didn’t even realize how crazy you must have sounded. You didn’t even realize that they were telling you to shut up until you felt the electricity shoot though your veins again, making you yelp in agony. 

You didn’t even realize you were blacked out again until you hit the floor. 

~~~

As much as Lord Vader detested the king of that damn planet, he did have to give him credit for his resilience. 

No matter how much the dark lord demanded that the king fork over the information of your whereabouts, he wouldn’t do it. In fact, he didn’t really say anything. Lord Vader would choke the king in his grasp until his majesty was almost dead. Then, releasing the force around the king, Lord Vader would allow his majesty to drop to the floor for a brief moment to cough and choke at the dark lord’s feet, the king’s old, wrinkled hand clutching his throat. Once Lord Vader decided that he took in enough air, the sith would lift up the king and choke him once more. This continued on for a large amount of time. Lord Vader only grew more and more violent with each new choke hold. Every succeeding choke would be more tight and constricting than the last, and each succeeding throw to the ground would be rougher and rougher than the last. 

Throwing the king to the ground for what felt like the millionth time, Lord Vader was unable to hide his anger as he spoke, his voice as deep and menacing as the devil’s. 

“Your suffering could end very quickly, your majesty,” the dark lord rumbled, his grip upon his ignited saber growing tighter and tighter, “If you tell me the information I wish to know.” 

The king was coughing and wheezing at Lord Vader’s feet, his hand trying to massage his aching throat. His majesty could barely keep himself up upon his hand and knees as he looked up at the sith lord, his body weak and desperate for air. The king’s face was significantly reddened and his eyes were full of tears as he gazed upon the sith. 

He felt as if he were looking at the devil himself. 

“N…” the King began to rasp out, his throat dry and aching with the fury of the sith, “Over… my dead… body..!” 

Lord Vader tilted his head to the side inquisitively at this. The sith could definitely see that this cretin was willing to die for his worthless cause. 

Pitiful. 

Disgusting. 

Repulsive. 

It only added flame to the fire of Lord Vader’s fury. 

How dare this thing keep him from you. 

Lord Vader would not allow it. 

“Fortuneatly, your majesty…” Lord Vader began to say.

A bright flash of crimson filled the king’s gaze, followed by an excruciating pain. The king tried to scream, but his throat was so hoarse and broken that all that left it was a loud, strong rasp as he fell to the floor, rolling on his back to present himself to the heavens above, begging his maker above to save him. 

But no one came. 

Not even the maker himself would dare to oppose Lord Vader in that moment. 

After a moment of the king groaning in pain, Lord Vader finished his sentence. 

“You do not need all of your limbs to survive.” 

Opening his eyes and looking to the floor, the king confirmed his suspicions. There lied the king’s severed hand, cut off right in the middle of his forearm. 

It was horrific. 

But he had to endure. 

“I...I am-” the king stammered out, interrupted by his own coughs, “I am the king of this planet. I am king Chad Lothario Junichiro The Fifth. I will not be slighted by these attempts to-” 

The king was cut off again, but this time by another brilliant flash of crimson. With another twirl of his saber, Lord Vader severed the rest of his majesty’s arm, just below the dip of his shoulder. This earned another rasp of pain from the king, his face contorting as he saw the pieces of his arm littering the floor.

“Does that change your mind?” Lord Vader asked, feigning a sense of calm in his tone, masking out the boiling amount of rage that pounded through his body, making the sith lord see red. 

The king panted and gasped for a long moment before wheezing out his answer. 

“I… Y-Yes… just… no more, please…” 

Lord Vader felt a twang of satisfaction course through him, interrupting the currents of fury that crashed inside him. Deigniting his saber, he continued to bore his gaze down upon the king, unfazed by the pain he was in. 

He deserved it. 

He put you in harms way. 

Lord Vader would not allow it. 

“Good.” Lord Vader rumbled out with feigned pleasure, “Now speak. If you tell the truth, I will contemplate allowing you to keep the rest of your limbs.” 

The king nodded his head at a feverish pace, swallowing his saliva before speaking.

“I-I had my guards take her down the hallway… the last room at the end…” 

Lord Vader looked at the king for a long while. He could not sense any form of deceit coming from the king, so he trusted his intuition that the creature must be telling the truth. The dark’s lords fists balled once more as he thought of you in that room. Reaching out with the force, he honed in on your life force again. You were still alive, but not in good shape. Lord Vader’s breathing hitched as he pictured what could possibly be happening to you. 

You were alone. 

Scared. 

Helpless.

In pain. 

Everything Lord Vader wanted to shield you from. 

He was failing to do so. 

Lord Vader would not fail. 

Clipping his saber back onto his belt, the sith lord quickly turned on his heel and began to exit the room, his cape fluttering behind him from the speed. Reaching out with the force, Lord Vader hurled the doors open, startling the stormtroopers that were waiting outside. Poor boys. 

Reaching out once more with the force, Lord Vader manipulated it to latch an invisible hand upon the king’s ankle, the dark lord dragging his majesty behind him as he marched. 

Rumbling out a quick follow me, Lord Vader commanded the group of stromtroopers to follow beind him. Obeying his order, the men in white marched behind the sith, their blasters clutched tightly in their gloves. A few of them began to whisper amongst themselves, their blasters and helmets motioning to Lord Vader and the man he was dragging behind him. Ordinarily, the dark lord would have warned them off the consequences of not maintaining proper contact. 

But in that moment, he couldn’t care in the slightest. 

The only thing in the galaxy that Lord Vader cared about… 

The only thing in the universe that Lord Vader wished to pursue…

Was to get you safe. 

To return your small, fragile body to his side. To take you away from this awful place. To make sure you were safe. To take you back to his Star Destroyer. To return you to your station where you would never be harmed again. Where he could see you every day. Where he could speak to you every day. Where he could constantly know that you were safe. Where he could see you smile. Where he could hear you laugh. Where he could hold you in his arms without prying eyes… 

How he longed to deliver you to this fate. 

Looking at the door that obscured the sight of you from him, he was filled with an unprecedented, uncanny, unfathomable amount of rage, anger, and hate.

How dare they keep you from him. 

They would be destroyed, just like every person who tried to stop him. 

~~~

You didn’t stay blacked out for very long before you awoke again, the pain in your shoulder still throbbing. 

You slowly began to sit back up again as you heard the rebel woman’s voice again, causing you to frown. 

“Done with your nap, scum?” 

You scoffed, “Yes. Very refreshing.” 

The woman scowled and crossed her arms again, meeting your gaze as she looked down upon you. 

“Shut up. Now, are you gonna talk? Or do we have to encourage you some more?” 

You sighed, your brow furrowing, “I already told you, lady, I don’t-”

“LIAR.” the woman bellowed, cutting you off. She nodded to the guard with the shocker stick again, “Give her some more motivation.” 

You bit your lip and closed your eyes as you saw him draw closer, not wanting to give the rebels any satisfaction of seeing the fear on your face again. You felt your shoulders tense and your wrists strain against the bindings as you heard the shocker ignite. 

Was this it? 

Is this the final curtain? Your finishing bow. 

You didn’t know.

You didn’t want it to be. It was funny for you to admit it now, but there was still so much you wanted to do. You had never thought that you would think such a thing after joining the Empire, but so much had changed. You were happy. You were excited to greet each day. You were thrilled to fix things. You were overjoyed to repair broken TIE Advanced x1s. You were over the moon that you put on your uniform each day. Such a stark contrast to what life had been like before. 

He had changed that. 

You were oh so happy when it was you and him. You were finally able to truly connect with another soul. You were finally able to admit your deepest and darkest regrets and tell your oldest stories. You were finally able to converse with another human. You were finally happy. You were finally able to smile. You were finally able to laugh. 

All because of him. 

And now… you were scared. 

You were oh so frightened that you would never be able to experience anything with him ever gain. That you would never speak to him again. That you would never look at him again. That you would never be able to laugh with him again. That you would never be able to share a dance with him again. That you would never be able to tell stories with him again. 

That you would never be able to tell him… 

You felt a lump in your throat as the guard’s boots stomped closer to you, making you tighten your lips into a line. 

Your mind filled with images of him and nothing but him. 

Vader… you thought to yourself. 

You could feel the electricity emanating off of the stick. 

I hope… 

You think of me… 

When you fly again. 

I’ll be one of the stars. 

Please… 

Wave hi if you see me. 

A hot tear ran down your cheek, dampening the surface. 

I’m sure you’ll know which one I am. 

Bracing for impact, you tensed your shoulders as you squinted your eyes shut. 

Instead of being greeted with the sound of electricity being forced into your body, you were greeted by a much more startling one; one that made you shoot your eyes open and whip your head up to look at the door. 

Or, what used to be the door. It was now in wadded clumps on the floor. 

In the door’s place was a large plume of smoke. The smoke was quickly illuminated with thin streams of red. 

Blaster bolts. 

Were you dreaming?

The bolts scattered themselves across the room, ending their path in the walls around it. A few lucky bolts met their end in the chests of the two guards that had locked you in that room, making them drop dead to the floor. 

If they hadn’t taken you against your will, you would have been horrified. 

As the smoke settled, you were able to make out what was behind it. 

A quite large battalion of stromtroopers, their blasters aimed and hot from their recent barrage. 

And in the middle of them all, looming oh so much taller than the rest. 

Lord Vader. 

Your savior. 

You felt your heart swell with every emotion known to man as your eyes widened. 

You flexed your muscles as you began the motion to call to him and run to his side, forgetting you were chained to the floor. Thinking it over a moment longer, you decided to stay put. The symbol of the rebellion was now plastered so that Lord Vader could see it. 

You thought it best to let him deal with them on his own. At least for now. 

Somehow, the rebel woman had survived the onterouge of blaster bolts with only a hit to her shoulder, her hand now clutching the wound as she extended her free one to Lord Vader, a pistol within her grip and finger laced around the trigger. She glared right into Lord Vader’s mask as she tried to put on a brave face, but the panting in her breath revealed her true emotions. 

It was her who broke the tension. 

“Give me…” she said in between pants, “one good reason… as to not pull the trigger.” 

Lord Vader tilted his head to the side at this, saying nothing. He must have been amused. 

“I believe I have someone of importance to you, rebel.” Lord Vader eventually said, the sound of his voice like music to your ears. You could almost cry. You were so relieved that you were able to hear it again. 

The woman raised a brow in confusion. As if it were on cue, a stormtrooper with something in his grip stepped forward. Without any sense of care, he threw the object in his grasp down at the floor to the woman’s feet. Following it's path, your eyes widened as you were able to process what exactly it was. 

A severed hand, along with about half a forearm. 

Looking back up at the woman, you noticed how her glare had fallen off of her face, one of fear replacing it as her brown eyes widened. 

“Th… that’s…” 

“His majesty’s hand.” Lord Vader finished for the rebel woman, his voice flat. “If you wish for the rest of him to return to you, I suggest you return my mechanic to me at once. I assure you that your king is still alive.” 

The woman’s face contorted into a glare again, her pistol still pointed at the dark lord. 

“How do I know this isn’t a trick? How do I know?” 

Lord Vader paused a moment before speaking again. 

“You don’t.” 

The woman’s lips pursed as she contimplarted the deal, her pistol now shaking in her grasp. The tension in that room was so thick you could cut it with a knife. It was almost suffocating. You could barely breathe. 

After a long pause, the woman lowered her blaster as she spoke.

“Okay… I accept.” 

Lord Vader tilted his head again at this. 

“Good. Now, give her back to me. Now.” 

The woman’s face contorting into a scowl and your cheeks staining pink, she kept her eyes on Lord Vader as long as possible as she knelt down to you, breaking you out of your bonds. Instantly, a pair of stormtroopers stepped forward and helped you to your feet, your body weak from the shocks. Wrapping your arms around the men’s shoulders, you looked to Lord Vader as they helped you limp over to their side. Flashing him a warm smile of thank you, I knew you would come, you noticed as his gaze followed you until he saw that you were right next to him again. 

Where you should always be. 

“Now, give me back Jun- I-I mean- give me back his majesty…” the woman demanded, pointing her blaster back to the dark lord. 

After a momentary pause of gazing at you, Lord Vader turned to another trooper, giving the nod of approval. The trooper nodding back, he signaled his other troops the okay. Within moments, a pair of other troopers drug in a barely conscious king into the room by his collar, throwing him down to the woman’s feet. Instantly, she knelt down and cradled the king in her arms, mumbling to him how she was sorry and such. 

“We are done here now, rebel.” Lord Vader spoke after a moment, forcing the reunion to a halt. Turning on his heel, Lord Vader walked close to the two stormtroopers who were helping you to stand as he exited the room. 

He did so, however, not before giving his troops one last command. 

“Kill them.” 

The sound of the barrage of blaster bullets that filled the room behind you was oddly comforting. 

~~~

His return to the Super Star Destroyer was not at all what he had imagined it to be. Nor was it what he wanted it to be. 

The shock stick that those filthy rebels used on you must have been extra strength. It was taking you a much longer time to recover as compared to other shock victims. You were barely able to stand on your own without wobbling and getting off balance. This was all not to mention the deep gash that had carved itself into your forehead. 

Lord Vader made the executive decision for you to spend at least two nights in the medical bay.

I just need to sleep it off, you had tried to protest, I’m fine. 

He would not have it. 

It was odd to see Lord Vader inside of the normal medical bay used for troopers and officers. Of course, he had his own medical bay that he would waltz in to and out of as he pleased. This was mostly due to the sheer complexity and amount of medical procedures that he needed to maintain homeostasis with his suit.

It was also due to him keeping his pride in tact by only letting as few people as possible know he was even capable of being injured. 

So, it was no shock that the nurse Lord Vader talked to was practically shaking in her boots. 

“I wish to see Miss (F/N) (L/N).” he said flatly to the nurse, paying no mind to how close she looked to shitting a brick right then and right there for everyone to see. 

“Y...Y-Yes, my Lord. R-Right this way…” she stammered out, gulping silently as she led the Dark Lord down the halls of the medical bay. She only stopped her scurrying once she led him to a door marked (L/N), (F/N). Pleased with her, Lord Vader dismissed her to carry on with her work, to which she practically ran back to her station. If he were anyone else in the galaxy, Lord Vader would have been offended. 

Reaching out his large hand to the panel adjacent to the doorframe, he pressed the glowing white button in the center. The door to your room then slid into the wall that encompassed it, allowing him in.

The sound of his respirator was much louder inside of the tiny room, the noise able to echo off the walls much faster. The room was very plain, with only the necessary equipment inside of it. The only other noise that emanated in the room was the occasional beep of the machine that was hooked up to you, signalling that you, indeed, still had a heartbeat. 

Lord Vader had hoped to converse with you upon his arrival. He was almost saddened to find out that he couldn’t. You were currently asleep upon the small bed in the center of the room, your lips parted slightly and your eyes closed. There was a bachata patch secured around the spot on your head where the gash had lain itself, as well as one on your shoulder where the shock stick had been pressed into you. Additionally, there were a plethora of sensors strapped to the flesh that ran up and down your arms. 

Lord Vader wanted to wake you. He wanted to coax you out of your sleep so that he could see your eyes, so that he could hear you talk. But, he knew better. He was to let you rest if you were to return to proper health. 

Yet, he was… disheartened. A phantom pain clenched his heart for a brief moment. 

Overtaken by the feeling, Lord Vader stepped closer to your bedside, his mask pointed right at your face as he watched you in your sleep. You looked so peaceful. He was grateful you had finally been able to rest. Reaching out his leather-bound hand, Lord Vader brushed a lock of hair out of your face as gently as he could, careful with the amount of force he used. Continuing the motion, the dark lord brushed the back of his mid-finger knuckles against the surface of your cheek, taking his time with trailing them down the surface. 

Maker above… 

You were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. 

But yet… 

Seeing you there in that cold, hard bed, with all the patches and wires coming off of your frame.... Hearing the beep of the machine behind him signal your heartbeat… Feeling how small your life force had been… 

It allowed an old friend to visit Lord Vader. 

Regret. 

If only he hadn’t brought you to that planet, none of this would’ve happened. Sure, you would be by yourself for a few days, but you would still be healthy. You would still be able to work. You would still be able to talk to him. You would still be able to smile. But no. He made you go on this trip. He made you attend those meetings and gatherings. He was the one who allowed you to slip into the hands of those rebels. 

Clenching his fist, another friend came to visit Lord Vader. 

Self-loathing. 

What in the galaxy was he thinking? He should have never taken you to that planet. All he wanted to do was to bring you someplace just as beautiful as you were. He wanted to see the look in your eyes and your smile as you got to see green for the first time in who-knows-how-long.

That’s all he wanted.

But not at all what he got. 

Lord Vader was speechless. He wanted to say something to your sleeping form, but couldn’t even begin to formulate the words of what he wanted to say. There were so many things he wanted to say to you, but every attempt he made to string them together seemed more idiotic than the last. So many feelings were bubbling inside of the sith lord, many of which he coudln’t describe. 

He didn’t know how to tell you about any of them. 

Yet… 

Watching your chest rise and fall… 

Watching your eyelashes flutter in your sleep… 

Watching your fingertips twitch…

He knew one thing. 

And oh how it pained him. 

He knew what he must do… 

To keep you safe. 

~~~

The nurses had said that you were asleep for about 18 hours when you finally woke up.

You were surprised, you didn’t think that it was possible to sleep that long of a time. Yet, there you were, doing the impossible. If it were under different circumstances, you would have almost been impressed. 

The nurses had removed the sensors from your arms as you sat up that afternoon, allowing you to move more freely as you ate the meal they gave you. Of course, it was rations. But, after being on that damned planet for so long and eating their food, rations had suddenly seemed to be the finest cuisine in the galaxy. 

You were watching a holovid of a news briefing when a knock came to your door, your cheeks puffed from your freshly taken bite. Hearing the door woosh open, you quickly chewed and swallowed the food so that you could talk to whoever had just entered without being rude. 

To say the absolute least, you were surprised to see a familiar face standing before you, datapad in hand just like before. 

The officer who gave you the assignment of Lord Vader’s mechanic. 

Was he a messenger for Lord Vader now? You were puzzled. 

“I am glad to see that you are finally awake, Miss (L/N).” the officer spoke, his eyes darting between you and the datapad. 

“Thank you, sir…” you mumbled back out in response. 

You paused a moment in contemplation before you continued on. 

“Sir,” you said, “If you don’t mind… could you please tell Lord Vader of my condition? I will be able to return to my station very soon, and-” 

“I’m afraid that will not be necessary, Miss (L/N).” the officer said, cutting you off. 

Your brow furrowed in confusion. 

“What? Sir, I… I don’t understand.” 

The old officer poked his datapad a few times before folding his hands behind his back, speaking out his response to you. 

You had thought that you were dreaming or hallucinating at the officer’s explanation. Your blood was cold, and your heart had felt like it stopped beating. 

It had to be a lie. 

“I’m afraid your time serving as Lord Vader’s mechanic is over, Miss (L/N). He has reassigned you. He has stated that you have completed your work on his TIE, and is no longer in need of your service. You are to return to Endor to your original station the day after tomorrow. I must say that I am impressed, Miss (L/N). I have never heard of someone completing such a task in such a short amount of time. I am certain that Endor will be quite pleased to have you return. You will be granted a small amount of severance for your time here, and will be respected immensely upon your arrival to Endor. I am certain your life there will be far better than the one you have experienced here on the Super Star Destroyer.” 

~~~

TAGS: @spaghetti-666 , @soullesstaco , @arsonistvoyager , @robin-obsessed , @glitter-rian , @captainrexstan , @easterncryptid , @deviatedwinter , @roseangel013bf , @danicalifxrnia , @dartheldur , @finest-trashbag , @yeah-boiiiiiiiiiii , @elongatedmusk-rat​ , @shads121 , @muffinbeliever , @sakuramadae​ , @padme-parker , @khapikat222  , @the-official-memester , @rens-angel , @obiwankenobiness , @yvette1703 , @breakfastpizzagalaxy , @missmannequin​ , @clearnostolgia​ , @scarletsinsandsnowwithetragedies​ 

[tinysatansierra-blog]

Markiplier manor is toxic here’s why

So Markiplier manor (Markipliers official discord server) has gotten a surplus of new people in it, this happened a few weeks ago the manor itself though has been up for awhile. originally a members only server it was eventually opened up for everyone and yes there are alot of genuinely good people and the mods are alright but unfortunately its becoming a toxic environment. 

SO EDIT i have discussed with the mods that being said ... im keeping this up as a reminder of we can do better we can help people who are struggling through something instead of shutting them down we can listen to people who are being oppressed and bravely point out new media that only worsens that oppression and stigmatization and not just the mods who i was kind of harsh towards but who are human everyone as a community can do better and this is a large community think of the work we can do just doing the basics like boycotting problematic content and helping those who cry out for it who need it (and noticing and shutting down manipulative/toxic behaviors) ... i dont know if im going to go back to the manor yet tho im going to let this sit give it a week yall can agree or disagree but know that if you try to be an ass your going to get shut down and your feelings are going to get hurt 

lets start with the basics “triggering topics” triggering topics can be anything in particular but it generally means a topic that relates to another persons trauma. Now while it is important to acknowledge a persons trigger words and try to keep the conversation respectable ive also noticed people use it to shut down people who come on freaking out because their dealing with a stressful situation/something traumatic just happened. This has happened to me personally and to a friend with me it was about being pro choice and having to in short make that actual choice. i was discussing this in the bathroom because i (like anyone else who comes in with baggage) did not know about any pro choice discords at that moment and was afraid of being stigmatized or going onto a discord that says its a safe space only for it to be filled with trolls. Mark manor is labeled as a safe space and many people come on there looking for support with me no one told me that the topic was triggering to them (which apparently it was because a friend of theirs had to make the choice not her herself think what you will) they just went to a mod early on when i just found the server as a member a friend (who i wont name) had gotten.... assaulted majority of her werent online and as someone who has been there and yes when she told me it did trigger my own trauma she needed moral support... the mod shut her down and deleted her comments and didnt give her a pointer to any other discord where she could discuss the topic openly and get moral support and be pointed to resources (it actually took me ten minutes to find and confirm a lgbtq therapy chat earlier this year for another individual discussing mental health) this was before i had gotten on for that day but i noticed those messages and i contacted her when she told me what was up yea it triggered my memories and its not fun but I FUCKING HELPED HER i made sure she went to the police to atleast file a statement (while the police dont always help it is good to have it on file) i even made her a plush and shipped it out to her and i would do it again and again because its not good to basically tell another person to shut up because it triggers others not without atleast trying to help them find another fucking place and making sure their actually ok and in a physical safe place  next is them claiming the manor is a “safe space” a safe space is by definition  “ a place or environment in which a person or category of people can feel confident that they will not be exposed to discrimination, criticism, harassment, or any other emotional or physical harm.” you would also think that the manor would be a safe space in the fact that marginalized and oppressed groups of people would be able to point out problematic content and have an open and free discussion about it and how it makes them uncomfortable. especially people of lgbtq community which alot of people in that chat are. yesterday (and this was what caused me to officially turn away from the server) in the patio (which is the members only chat) a Transgender individual pointed out the problematic content that is huniepop and how it fetishizes trans people as well as other minorities now this game i hear tries to make itself out as a “parody” .... its not its a sexual dating sim what would make it a parody is if sex noises were replaced with donkey sounds and the lewd pictures were replaced with poorly drawn doodles of tits or what have you its a game for incels marks hilarious when he plays it because he doesnt take the game seriously my issue isnt with him its with the developer. and if you did not know (which apparently people dont) the character poli is described as “a girl with a dick” the individual pointed this out because they felt like it dehumanizes them and paints them as nothing more than a fetish... and also apparently you can “choose” is poli is trans which kind of gives off the message that people can ignore trans peoples identity if it makes them uncomfortable... or if they dont sexualize them. and the muslim community is more or less in the same boat i come from the bible belt in usa im not muslim i am not trans but i do have a reason for standing with both and i will get to that in a bit so i was raised in a christian household in a christian setting like muslim women were basically told we cannot have sex and any sexual thought is sinful and we will be punished blah blah blah your even more closeted if your gay or bi because then you can face ... violence that being said to make the woman from the middle east hyper sexual like they did is kind of shitty even for a incel pleasing sex game. the individual who thought it would be ok to discuss this in the server because its labeled as a safe space and is generally “lgbtq” friendly thus believing he would have people agree and discuss ... was unceremoniously shut down by their peers and a mod was notified this person was not hostile maybe a bit frustrated because he wanted to talk about it and thought he would have this genuinely helpful conversation and people would listen and spread the word because to have problematic content be popular can isolate the oppressed group even more so WHEN NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO THEM. if a group of marginalized people notice something problematic with content and you claim to be an ally of said group then you need to acknowledge and support what they say. they told him to go to twitter where he could potentially be bullied and written off ... because again its an INCEL PLEASING SEX GAME.(which means incels if you ever dealt with them will go and say anything to justify the game even using slurs and bullying) and to put the icing on the cake to change the topic they brought up robin ... i actually dont know who robin is as i dont really focus much on youtube creators personal stuff (it feels off for me to not personally know an individual but know their personal stuff without having actually talking to them its weird i know its a thing i have in my head) but apparently they recently came out as female and good for them im super proud of him and the patio members were discussing how they were proud of him as well for beginning to wear makeup and making themselves more feminine which would be great if they werent trying so hard to shut down the trans male who was trying to spread awareness on problematic stuff .... something he pointed out ... and something they gaslighted and said he was being hostile. really its almost as if they only care about trans issues when its someone famous discussing them  so what can we possibly do about huniepop being transphobic and the answer is very easy BOYCOTT IT like... yall were up in arms and boycotted jk rowling with snap and a turn do we only cancel the old and ugly? do we only cancel those who we dont think is funny? mark is not at fault he probably doesnt realize it and any comments made on the issue are talked down upon or drowned amongst other comments im not saying to cancel him im saying to cancel the game HARD. ignore the posts bitch at the dev demand refunds for your game. like consumers have infinitely more power than corps want to admit.  so you basically have a community that claims to be a safe space but only if you want to talk about sunshine and rainbows and its highly hypocritical of them to claim safety.  another thing is emotionally abusive/manipulative people hide in the server and the mods dont ever seem to acknowledge it. i cannot tell you how many times ive gotten into arguments with people who seems nice then turn into assholes then claim to be the victim when i or others go off on them. if you recognize my name you know i dont stand down when it comes to having a snarky or rude comment thrown at me if your going to be an ass were fighting i dont care how nice you seemed beforehand and you dont get to call a mod just because i actually stood up for myself or others sorry not sorry dont be a bitch nuff said.  now why would i care so much about problematic content? why would i care and stand by the transgender and muslim people (aside from being ya know... an actual ally and not someone who claims it for sympathy and brownie points?) its because i am autistic i am also able to function well on my own but there is a movie created by the famous singer sia it is called music it is a movie frowned upon by the autisitic community because infantizes and dehumanizes non verbal autistic people i am fortunate and unfortunate in not having to deal with much stigma unfortunate because i wasnt diagnosed until i was 17 alot of answers about my behavior could have been answered if i had been diagnosed earlier but considering society loves the quiet timid female and i functioned “well” for neurotypicals i was ignored. so yea you bet your ass im standing with them and raising awareness about huniepop and their was this one person when i mentioned this point i cant remember there name nor to do i give a shit about them because when i mentioned how autistic people ... how i was in the same boat with music by sia (again i advise that no one target the actress who was under contract target sia and please boycott her so she knows she cant get brownie points or money for a movie that stigmatizes who she claims she wants to “help” (*cough* profit off of *cough cough*) and only serves as a feel good movie for neurotypicals and ignorant people)  they said “i heard people who hated the movie i heard people who found it alright people are ALLOWED to like problematic content” ... and like ... does anyone else see the problem here? its not hard at all to boycott celebrities for making content  and im going to repeat this point  IF A GROUP OF MARGINALIZED, STIGMITIZED AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE CALL OUT SOMETHING FOR BEING PROBLEMATIC AND YOU CLAIM TO BE AN ALLY YOU FUCKING LISTEN TO THEM AND DONT SHUT THEM DOWN I DONT GIVE A SHIT YOU DONT HAVE A FUCKING EXCUSE. if you cant bring yourself to boycott a piece of media and replace it with the infinitely more suitable forms that supports the group you claim to be for your not an ally your a fucking hypocrite  and that is why i left markiplier manor i am still a youtube special ... thingy member and i will continue to be a member to support mark i want people to overall listen to those who speak up against a creator and a piece of media and listen to us all no matter how “good” something seems. .. also there is a video called listen it was created by nonverbal autistic people  and communicationFIRST a group that sia apparently communicated with for her movie... and then ignored  https://youtu.be/H7dca7U7GI8

[meltwonu]

May you please do #9 and #39 with Dom!Jeonghan?

9. “Try to stay quiet, understand?”

39. “You taste like fucking candy.”

note; yall this potentially exists in my fratboy au, also boob job also minor cum play also he’s kinda mean in this(we all kno hes a lil devil) yeet thank u for requesting! enjoy!💕

PLAY MY DRABBLE GAME HERE | ASK | MASTERLIST

__________________________________________________

When a mildly inebriated Jeonghan corners you at a frat party, you don’t know what to expect.

Vernon was a friend of yours who had invited you to his frat houses’ party and you had agreed to come. Greek life wasn’t typically your thing but you weren’t unfamiliar to parties, although the last time you’d gone to one was definitely months ago now. Memories of it were foggy; the only real things you remembered were Joshua’s awful drink concoctions as he shoved cup after cup into your hands and Jeonghan’s hands in your panties when he shoved you into a hallway closet. Did you cum? You didn’t even know. All you knew was that you woke up in Vernon’s bed the next morning, puking your guts out in his bedside trash can while he was still black out drunk in the yard.

By the time you’re heading up to Vernon’s room to pass out in his bed, it’s about 1:00am, or so you think. You’re tipsy at best, deciding that getting too drunk probably wouldn’t be the best idea considering the last time. But you make it up the stairs, glancing down at the party still going on the first floor before you turn and start heading down the hallway towards Vernon’s room. You make it about halfway before a door swings open, Jeonghan on the other side as he stops in front of you.

“Jesus Christ, I’ve been waiting on you all fuckin’ night.” He looks irritated at best as he runs his hands through his blonde locks. “Huh? Why?” He chuckles, a slight flush to his skin as he pulls you into his room.

“Fuck you mean ‘why’? Time for payback after last time.” The door closes behind you, your legs mildly wobbly as he presses you up against the door.

“Hey! What the fuck!”

“Hey, how about you fuckin’ keep it down. Try to stay quiet, understand? Minghao’s roomin’ next to me and that dude is already pissed there’s a party ragin’ downstairs. And yes, I said last time, can’t you hear?”

“Last time? Oh, you mean...that. Yeah, I don’t remember much.” He rolls his eyes at you, slotting a leg between yours as he places his hands on either side of your head.

“Huh. Don’t even remember my fingers knuckle deep in that pussy huh? Fuck, or when you begged me to spit in your mouth. Wow, did I not do my worst on you? Incredible.”

“I…”

“You didn’t even let me cum, you practically ran out of that closet once you got what you wanted. And people say I’m mean.” He tsks you, tucking a stand of your hair behind your ear as he stares down at you. “Now I think it’s time for me to get what I want.”

“Okay… so what do you want?”

“I wanna see you on your knees and those pretty tits out for me, baby.” You quirk a brow at him, nodding slightly as he pulls away from you, giving you enough space to slowly slide down onto your knees. The rug bites into your kneecaps as you grimace, hands already working on getting your tank top off.

“Interesting. Do you just not wear a bra ever or?”

“Figured it’d be dark and nobody would care.”

You toss the material off to the side as Jeonghan undoes the button of his jeans, sliding the zipper down just as quick. He slides his hand into his boxer briefs, wrapping a hand around his cock as he pumps it, spreading the precum around his cockhead. “Listen, you’re gonna spit on my cock and get it nice and wet for me and then you’re gonna squeeze those pretty tits together while I fuck ‘em.” You make no comment, instead inching forward until you’re directly in front of his crotch.

You tug his underwear down, immediately wrapping a hand around his cock as you bring it closer to your face. Jeonghan watches you as you open your mouth over his cock, globs of spit coating his cock as you spread it all over his shaft. You continue this a few more times, thoroughly wetting his cock before you pull away, pressing your breasts together.

“Well?”

When Jeonghan thrusts between your boobs the first time, the feeling is weird. But you get used to it, letting him use your body to get off. “Fuck, I thought I was gonna have to use my hand to get off tonight. I was already thinkin’ about the shit I wanted to do to you but you were takin’ too damn long to get up here.”

“That sounds kinda creepy but okay.” Jeonghan gives you a particularly hard thrust for that little comment, the head of his cock hitting your lips. “Says the girl who asked me to spit in her mouth. I bet you’re into all sorts of nasty shit, just need the right guy to get you off.”

“Yeah? Do you know a guy?”

“Fuck, would you shut up?” You giggle, pressing your boobs together tighter as he continues to fuck them.

You can’t deny how wet you are from just watching him, thighs rubbing together to get some relief.

“Mm, baby, I think I’m gonna cum soon.” Sticking your tongue out, you bat your eyelashes at him as he watches you. Jeonghan pulls away, wrapping his fingers around his cock as he pumps it over your chest. He makes a mess on you, streams of cum hitting your chest and mouth as he lets out a drawn out moan. You feel sticky, his warm cum trickling down your skin as you swallow what’s on your tongue. Licking your lips, he brings his cock to your mouth, smearing the leftover cum all over your mouth.

When he’s satisfied, he leans down, kissing your cum smeared lips as his fingers swipe a glob of cum off your clavicle. He plays with it between his fingertips, bringing it to a nipple before he pinches the nub with his sticky fingers.

He pulls away, licking the seam of your lips.

“You taste like fucking candy.”

You moan, his fingers still teasing your nipples as he coats them both in the warm substance.

“Do I? All I taste like is your cum and alcohol, probably.”

“So? That’s all you should ever taste like, baby.”

[ddaenggtan]

hearts on fire | jhs

Hoseok has been in love with you for as long as he can remember, and he’s beyond excited to see you married and glowing.

He just really wishes that he was the groom.

pairing | jhs x reader, knj x reader

word count | 6.5k | cross posted to ao3

genre | angst, light fluff

warnings | angst, mentions of blood, mentions of vomit, lots of choking, lots of angst, this is open ended so like.......potential (?) mcd??, like this is very very very open ended yall there is no happy ending and there is zero satisfaction at the end, like it’s truly just here to hurt you

a/n | part of Outro: Tear, The Angst Now Told, and you should really read all of those fics bc they hurt so good but they’re sO WORTH IT, and i’m shouting out to @personawife​ not only for betaing this, but also for putting the Outro Tear Angst Collab together, because it’s been so fun!!!!! and yet so painful!!!! in so many good ways!!!!!!! this was honestly really fun to write, mostly because it’s rare that i write angst - unhappy ending angst, at that - so it was nice to stretch my creative muscles. 

also go stream ego bc its wonderful and i love it

It starts, as most things do, with a kiss. 

It was innocent enough - just a soft peck on his cheek and a sunflower in his hand while he cried about another student kicking him in the shin. To this day he can’t be sure what it was that did it for him. Maybe it was the way the sunlight lit up the barrettes in your hair and made them glint like stars. Maybe it was the way you hadn’t hesitated to smooch him on the cheek and give him the flower you’d picked out of a vase just to cheer him up. Maybe it was the fact that it had worked when nothing else had. Maybe it was none of that, instead something bigger altogether and more complicated than he could ever understand. 

Or maybe it was all of it. A simple act that led to a simple reaction - him taking your hand and making you smile with some face he made - that led to this moment. 

Either way, Hoseok decides as he watches you walk down the aisle in the off-white dress with the golden sash that perfectly matches the sunflowers in your hands, he doesn’t care. Because it all led to this moment. 

[then]

“C’mon, we’re gonna be late!” You call over your shoulder. Hoseok laughs, wrapping his hand around your wrist to slow you down from your sprint. 

“We are not going to be late,” He tells you firmly. Your lips form a pout that he wishes he could kiss away, but he resists the urge. Instead, he grins and pulls you into a warm hug. “It’s not like they’re going to start our graduation without us, Starshine. It would be a little conspicuous, don’t you think?”

“Ooh, conspicuous, big word! All that studying paid off, I see.”

Hoseok rolls his eyes; he doesn’t mention that he’s been studying his ass off ever since you started crushing on one of the bookworms in the school. He refuses to acknowledge to himself that he did it in the futile hope that it would make you notice him. 

“Hey, it was worth it! Got me into that fancy university, didn’t it?” He wags his brows and lets go of you, and he does his best not to let his arms linger around your waist for longer than they need to be there. 

“Yeah, that fancy university that’s a million miles away from here,” You complain. His smile falters a little, and he covers it with a dramatic gasp. 

“What’s this? Is my little starshine going to miss me?” He doesn’t tell you about the packet laying on his desk at home, about the scholarships he’s scoured the internet to find, about the decision he has yet to make, despite the looming deadline. He doesn’t mention the sunflower pressed between the pages of a book that sits beside his bed, so he can stare at it each night as he wonders whether it’s stupid to take the harder road just for love.

“You know I will, Hobi,” You tell him. You curl into his side, lacing your fingers with his. “You’re my best friend in the whole world. I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. Who’s going to make me study when I don’t want to? Or convince me that getting pancakes at two in the morning is a proper breakfast?”

Hoseok shakes his head. He knows exactly what will happen when you head off to school in a few months. You’ll meet so many new people, make boatloads of friends, create new memories and new jokes and new references, and he’ll be standing off to the side, waiting to hear about all of it. 

He can’t wait to watch you flourish.

“Who’s going to help you stop stressing out about your choreography, or your routines?” You ask. Your voice dips into a whisper, and it’s the most scared he’s ever heard you. “Who’s going to be there when I need someone?” 

He knows what you mean; he knows all about the anxiety that wracks your body every so often, the way your brain spirals and panics and can’t seem to bring itself down out of red alert. He remembers - in vivid detail - all the nights he’s climbed through your window to help you breathe in that rhythm your school counselor taught you, or just talked at you through the phone about some new song or dancer he found until he eventually heard your soft laugh.

He remembers the nights you called and called and called and eventually just sought him out, not even bothering to knock as you barged into his room because his parents adore you and don’t care to let you in whenever. You’re like a second daughter to them, something his sister gives him no end of grief about. He’ll always remember the way your hands felt against his skin as you tugged him out of his room and into the kitchen to make some kind of monstrosity, just throwing anything and everything into a blender or skillet, only to wind up going out to the corner store to get noodles anyway. 

“I’ll be here,” He tells you. His voice is as soft and firm as his fingers as he brings your chin up to face him. He wants you to look at him, wants you to maybe see after all these years just how easy it would be for him to move the earth if you asked him to. “I’ll always be here for you.”

Your eyes search for something in his, and he wonders if you’ll finally realize. If he’s finally told you about every single pang of love that he’s ever felt without even needing words. 

You smile, your eyes crinkling at the corners, and playfully shove at his shoulder. “Not when you’re off at your fancy university a million miles away from mine.”

He covers the heartbreak with a deep sigh and slings his arm around your shoulders as you head into the building where your graduation is being held. He wonders what you’ll think of the sunflowers sitting on your chair, waiting for you to find them. 

Something tickles his throat, a hint of a cough not ready to be cleared, and he swallows it back. 

“About that…”

[then]

Asthma is what he tells you, months and months later while you both sit in your dorm room, curled under blankets. 

You’re preparing for your philosophy paper, pages and sheets and everything else strewn about your bed while he sits at your desk. The lamp is focused and bright as it shines on the metal and stone in his hands, glinting as he twists the wire this way and that. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be studying for your dance eval?” You ask him. He shoots you that half-smile, a quick glance so that he can finish wrapping the quartz in his palm. He hasn’t told you that he switched majors, that he’s now ‘undecided’ simply because he can’t keep up with the others anymore.

“Aren’t you supposed to telling me who made it their mission to disprove Kant’s entire career?”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to,” You pout. He smiles, satisfied, at the stone in his hand; it’s wrapped in wire shaped to look like a tree. He never thought he’d be the jewelry-making kind, but thanks to a randomly-selected elective, he’s discovered he’s got a knack for it. 

Besides, he enjoys seeing the collection on your windowsill grow with each new thing he can make you. 

He extends the quartz to you -  a polished golden one that complements the tarnished brass he’d used to wrap it, the same colors as the flowers you love so much - and the way you light up as you take it makes his heart clench painfully. 

Something tickles his throat, too familiar now, and he does what he can to swallow it down, but this one is stubborn. It forces its way up his windpipe, giving him no choice but to try to cough it up. 

You watch, worried, as he rushes to the sink in your room, bending as far over it as possible so that you won’t see as much. 

It’s small, when it falls. Small and unassuming and spit-slick, he can almost believe it just fell out of the vase of them nearby, and he hopes that’s what you’ll believe as well. 

“Hobi?” 

He hates how small your voice is, how worried you sound as you listen to the ragged pants of his breathing. So he wipes his mouth, checks in the mirror to make sure there’s no blood, and turns back to you with a wry smile. 

“I’m fine,” He says softly. His voice is still hoarse, and you don’t look convinced, but he continues before you can argue. “Just asthma.”

“Asthma? You don’t have asthma, Hoseok-”

“I do,” He says quickly. “Developed recently. Strained myself too hard, weakened my lungs, or something. I don’t remember what the doctor said exactly.”

“But...your dance, how can you-” You cut yourself off with a sharp breath, and he can’t bear to see the heartbreak in your eyes as the realization hits, so he stares down at the scuff in his sneakers instead. “That’s why you aren’t practicing right now. You had to drop out of the dance program?”

You sound like you’re on the verge of tears, so he plasters a smile on his face that’s more convincing than anything else he’s ever done. 

“It’s fine, Starshine. Not all dreams come true. Besides, there’s other things I can do.” 

“But your scholarship, Hobi, I-”

“Already figured out,” He says quickly. It isn’t, not nearly, because he can’t just call his parents to say ‘hey I lost my scholarship because I’m hopelessly in love but don’t have the guts to say anything about it’ and he hasn’t had time to go visit them, either. The corners of your mouth are turned down, and your lips are pressed together, and it’s obvious you’re upset, and it hurts more than the roots tangling in his lungs. 

He crosses the room and slides some of your papers to the side so that he can sit across from you. You’re still holding the quartz in your palm, fingers wrapped gently around it like you’re afraid it’ll break if you squeeze too tight, so he wraps his own hands around that one of yours. 

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” You ask him. Your voice is small and hurt, and he hates that he made it that way, but he knows it’s better than what would come if he told you the truth. 

“Because I didn’t want you to worry,” He replies quietly. “You’ve got exams and studying and papers to worry about. I don’t need to add to that. Besides, you’d just try to help somehow, and you do that enough as it is.”

“How could I possibly be helping you with this, Hoseok?” The look you give him is familiar and humorless and fond and it makes his throat tickle so he looks away. Stares down at the feather-soft blanket in your lap instead. 

“Just by being here,” He tells you. “Distracting me from it. It’s not important, that’s all. I can do other things.”

“Like what? Dancing has always been your dream, and now-”

“Like,” Hoseok interrupts, sliding the quartz from your hand and placing it with the other things he’s made you on the windowsill, “Making things, like this. For you. For everyone.”

You’re quiet for a minute. Your eyes linger on the collection of stones he’s decorated for you, that he’s worked on so carefully to make them as beautiful as you deserve, and he wonders if you can tell. 

If you can see it in every careful twist of wire, in the way his hands are always so gentle against your own, in the way he can’t bear to look at you for longer than a few moments but can’t bear to be away from you in the same way. 

“Well,” You eventually say, blinking back what might be tears. “I suppose we’ll just have to find you a new dream, then, won’t we?”

Your smile is weak and watery and doesn’t reach your eyes, but it’s still a smile. So he returns it, and locks his pinky with yours, and vows to himself to make sure you never cry for him again. 

[then]

"What is that?"

Hoseok looks up from the book he's got propped against the table. He hasn't been paying much attention to the conversation, too engrossed in the metalworking book his glassblowing professor gave him while you studied for an upcoming test, so your words surprise him.

"What's what?" He asks, looking around the cafeteria as if he can magically spot whatever it is you're talking about.

" That ," you repeat, stabbing towards him with your pencil. It's reflex that brings his hand up to his chest, and it's realization that has him clutching the pendant tightly, praying you hadn't really seen it.

"Nothing," he says quickly, tucking it back under his shirt where it's supposed to be. "Just a practice thing."

"Why won't you show me?" You pout. "You always show me your practice work."

"Yeah, because you always take it," He quips back with a laugh. You don't even try to argue, because you both know it's true. The collection on your windowsill has grown immeasurably over the last two years, and it makes Hoseok's heart stutter every time he lets himself consider why you keep all of them. Especially when some are so terrible.

"Seriously, Hobi, can I see?"

He starts to say no, because if there's one piece he's ever made that could tell you about his feelings, it's this. He should say no, should insist this once that you can't see it, but before he can, his hands are pulling the chain over his head and setting the entire thing gently in your palm.

He watches your mouth fall open and your eyes grow wide and he wonders.

He wonders what you see among the curl of metal; if the fact that he would do anything for you is obvious in the way it twists and turns on itself, looping around and around. He wonders if you can see, hidden between letters, how just being near you gets him through every day and makes it all worth it. He wonders if you'll be able to tell, between the pressed yellow petals, just how his chest aches; if you've put the pieces together, after so long, now that you're holding his heart so openly in your palm.

"'Remedy,'" You read, and Hoseok's heart jumps into his throat, even when he knows you don't know about it. "And some tulip petals? It's so gorgeous, Hobi, but what does it mean?"

"They're sunflowers," He corrects, almost scandalized that you could confuse the two. The petals are shortened, of course, cut so that they'll fit into the pendant without obstructing the text in the back, but still. "And it doesn't mean anything. Just something I wrote once in high school."

Your eyes light up. "You mean that poem you never let me read?"

"It was a song, actually," He mutters, but your attention is back on the necklace, looking for any hints about the secrets he keeps. Something soft tickles the back of his throat when you glance up at him and smile, the light glinting just right along the stones and casting golden beams along your features.

You look more beautiful than he's ever seen, and his chest aches with more than just the flowers taking root there.

"This is really gorgeous, Hobi," You tell him as you watch the way the light reflects through the amber beads along the edge.

"Yeah," He whispers as he watches you, drinking in the way your eyes widen in awe and the soft smile on your lips. "It is, isn't it?"

He wishes that moment could last forever, that he could tuck it away into a pocket and pull it out whenever he needs it, but he can feel the flower starting to work its way up his throat and he doesn't know how to hide that from you.

The coughs start right as someone calls out your name and his, and he tucks his chin into his elbow in an effort to hide it. He doesn't bother to look yet, just waves a hand as someone sits beside you, and by the time he's got the handful of petals tucked safely away in his pocket, you're deep in conversation with Namjoon about one of the classes the two of you are taking.

[now]

Hoseok decides, looking at you now, that you are happier than ever. 

You've said your vows and you've cried several happy tears and you've kissed more times than he can count, but you're still radiant. It's the glow of contentment, the promise of more to come, all coalescing to shine like stars in your eyes. 

"May I, Starshine?" He asks, extending a hand and pulling you away from your current dance partner. Yoongi doesn't look too upset about it, just smiles knowingly at you both as your hand folds into Hoseok's. 

You move with him as if it's second nature, and Hoseok supposes that it is , at this point. As many times as he held you this way while teaching you the steps, as often as he led you through them before today, you should be able to move out of sheer muscle memory. 

"Have I told you yet that you're sparkling, Starshine?" He asks, smiling along with you when you laugh. 

"I think that you're confusing me and the ring again, Hobi." 

On cue, he looks down at it. He spent so long on it, years of dreaming of what it may look like and months of trial and error and practice runs before he got it right. It was worth it, though; the ring does sparkle, takes the glow of your skin and the joy in your smile and amplifies it. 

Crafted to look like a sunflower itself, the ring is easily the most expensive thing he's ever made. Each petal sparkles with the same yellow quartz of that stone he gave you so long ago, and set into the middle is one large chocolate diamond that he spent entirely too much money on because it was already cut exactly the way he needed it. He'll never forget the way you cried when you saw it the first time. 

Hoseok's eyes meet yours, and he frowns at the tears he sees there. 

"Hey, none of that, Starshine. It's a happy day, remember?" He stops moving in the middle of the dance floor, hands moving to wipe your tears before they can fall. 

"I just...I'm so happy Hobi." He grins at your words, resisting the urge to poke fun, because of course you're happy. You just got married. 

You look up at him again, eyes still watery and he pulls you into a tight hug. 

"I love you so much, Hobi," you mutter against his chest. His heart flutters in his chest as he resists the urge to press his lips to yours right where you stand. 

"Yeah," He whispers. "Yeah, I love you too, Starshine." 

Someone taps him on the shoulder and he releases you, relinquishing his grasp on you so you can dance with Namjoon. The pendant around your neck sits beautifully, shadowed on either side by the white of the cloth, and he thinks for just a moment, that maybe he made that pendant for you, after all. 

He's worn it for years, of course, but the smile on your face when he slid it around your neck was worth it. It was worth being asked if you could have it, not entirely joking, and it was worth every single time you would fiddle with it during movie marathons, and it was worth every single night he held it in his clutched palm as he sat over the sink and coughed up the yellow blooms that you've strung up all over the reception hall. 

very day that you bugged him about it, how you asked every day without fail if you could have it. He knew you were kidding - mostly - but the light in your eyes when he finally gave it to you before the wedding today is something he’ll remember for the rest of his life, no matter what the future holds for him. 

It ends, as most things do, with a conversation. 

It was innocent enough - just a phone ringing in its place on the worktable and his hands covered in clay while he struggled to hit the screen with his elbow. To this day he can’t be sure what it was that he missed, exactly. Maybe it was the way that you’d been calling him less and less in the middle of the night. Maybe it was the way you hadn’t noticed that he’d been spending too much time in the studio, pouring his soul into every shape he crafts and wire he twists while he chokes down petals. Maybe it was the classes the two of you shared and the projects you worked on together, that he assumed was friendly and not anything more. Maybe it was all of that, everything working in tandem in a way that he could never understand.

Or maybe it was none of it. Simple acts that led to simple reactions - being too busy for each other, not talking as often, coughing up sunflower petals - that all led to that moment. 

Either way, Hoseok decides as he watches the heart-shaped vase spin aimlessly on its wheel while you cry tears of joy through the phone because he finally - finally - asked you out, he can’t care.

[then]

Asthma? is what Jimin asks him, years later when they’re both locked in Hoseok’s newly renovated store, basically a hole in the wall that he saved and saved for with his online sales. Hoseok is curled over the workbench in the back, doing everything he can to catch the petals before Jimin can see them. 

When they eventually subside, long enough for him to gulp down some water and shove the red-tinted petals off to the side in a pile that’s been steadily growing for weeks now, Hoseok shoots Jimin a self-deprecating smile. 

He doesn’t even get a chance to lie to him. 

“How long?” Jimin asks him. There’s no softness to his tone; it’s all hard edges and naked truths, and for once, the exhaustion overtakes Hoseok. He’s so sick of lying. He’s so sick of carrying an inhaler he doesn’t need, of shoving sunflower petals into every nook and cranny he can find so that no one sees them, and he just wants someone to know. 

“Forever,” Hoseok answers simply. “As long as I can remember.”

“And you never said anything? Ever?”

Hoseok sighs, throat scratchy and raw, and he stares down at the ring he’s been fiddling with. “Would you?” He eventually says. 

When he looks at Jimin, the other man has a petal of his own in between two fingers and rubs it absently, distractedly, like it’s habit. When he looks up, Hoseok understands, and an understanding passes between them. 

Jimin goes back to the laptop perched in front of him while Hoseok continues to work on other orders, things less important than the ring burning a hole in his mind’s eye, begging to be made. 

He isn’t ready, he tells himself. He isn’t skilled enough yet. Maybe one day. 

“I’m getting the surgery,” Jimin says after a few hours of silence. Hoseok fumbles with the pliers in his hands, twists the wire the wrong way, and it all clatters to the tabletop. He doesn’t bother to catch it, either; he’s too busy staring at his best friend in shock. 

“Seriously?” He breathes. Jimin nods, and the air rushes out of Hoseok in the span of a heartbeat. 

Everyone knows about the surgery, just like everyone knows about hanahaki disease. It took years to develop and it’s the only known treatment, but there are always side effect. Always. Sometimes they’re minor, just losing your feelings of love for the person you have feelings for, or like the guy that just became allergic to the peonies that he had removed. 

But then there are the others. 

The people who lose the capacity to love altogether. The ones who never find anyone else, who never learn how to love another person, not like they loved the one that caused the flowers. Or the ones who just lose their emotions completely, and become essentially lifeless. Unable to feel love at all, or sadness, or grief, or joy, or excitement, or remorse, or anything. They just exist. 

“But...the side effects-”

“Aren’t guaranteed,” Jimin interrupts. “Plenty of people get the procedure every day and walk away fine.”

“Yeah and some of them turn into lifeless machines!” Hoseok counters. Jimin’s expression hasn’t changed. He looks steadfast, decided, and he’s barely looking away from whatever work he’s doing on the laptop, and it infuriates Hoseok. “You’re gonna sign away any hope that you have, any chance that you have, because it...because it hurts?”

“No,” Jimin says as he closes the laptop and slides it to the side. “Because I’m tired, Hobi. I’m so tired, all the time. I’m tired of keeping it a secret, and I’m tired of puking my guts every time I think about-” Jimin cuts himself off and closes his eyes, tight, as he swallows. 

When he opens them, Hoseok can see every emotion he’s ever had in Jimin’s eyes, and it makes his heart ache. 

“Aren’t you tired, Hobi?” 

Jimin’s voice is small, and weak, but it lingers in the air between them. It curls past Hoseok’s throat and then down to wrap around his chest, growing tighter and tighter with every breath. Neither of them break eye contact, and Hoseok wonders what Jimin sees in his face. 

“Yeah,” Hoseok eventually says. With that, the spell is broken, and he can breathe again, and he drags his eyes away from Jimin to look at the piece he’d been working on instead. “But I can’t just...stop, y’know? I’ve loved her for basically my entire life. I can't...I don’t even know who I am without that.”

Jimin’s quiet for a long moment, and Hoseok thinks maybe he’s not going to say anything. Maybe he got through to Jimin, maybe he won’t get that surgery. 

“Don’t you think that you should find out?”

[now]

Hoseok watches from across the room as Jimin spins you in a circle, both of you laughing brightly. 

Jimin’s suit matches your dress wonderfully; Hoseok doesn’t think anyone else could quite pull off the pattern on it quite like Jimin does in such an effortless way. He looks happier than Hoseok has ever seen him, more content, more at home in his own skin. 

He isn’t coughing, and he isn’t struggling, and everything worked out well for him. No more flowers in his lungs, no more lies to his friends, no more unrequited love left heavy in his heart. Just happiness and laughter and joy. Hoseok wonders if he’d be the same. 

His thumb rubs absently across the business card in his pocket. It’s been there since Jimin handed it to him, what feels like forever ago now. It’s worn, and faded, and torn, and old, but the doctor is still practicing, just got recognized by the World Health Organization for his work. There’s an appointment reminder dinging in Hoseok’s phone, and a business card in his pocket, and he still doesn’t know if he’s even going to go, because you look so beautiful. 

You’re surrounded by your flowers, and you’re glowing like the North Star, and he can’t keep his eyes off of you. 

“She’s gorgeous, right?”

Hoseok turns and smiles at Namjoon. The man looks just as good, decked out in the best suit money can buy, with crinkles in the corner of his eyes and a dimple in his cheek as he grins.

“Yeah, she is,” He says. Emotions clog in his throat when he looks back at you only to find you looking his way. There’s love in your eyes and a soft, private smile on your lips, and it makes his chest tighten. “She looks really happy.”

“She does,” Namjoon agrees. 

Across the room, you wiggle a finger, and the ring glints in the light. Hoseok stifles a laugh, and shakes his head. 

“I can’t dance anymore, so this is all on you, big guy,” He tells Namjoon. The other man looks more than happy to take him up on the offer, grinning sheepishly as he sets his drink down to make his way to you. 

You take Namjoon’s hand and pull him close as the music transitions into a slow dance. Namjoon presses his forehead against yours, and both your eyes close, and suddenly, Hoseok feels like he shouldn’t be watching. This feels private, intimate, in a way that he’s never been privy to.

His throat clenches and he can feel it in his throat. 

He nearly drops his drink, but he gets to a table just in time to put the cup down with shaky hands. He knew, he knew what would happen. He clenches his jaw and heads through the side door of the event space, barely chancing a glance behind him. You don’t seem to have noticed, thankfully, but Hoseok makes eye contact with Jimin. The younger boy taps his wrist, and Hoseok just heads outside. 

He doesn’t need Jimin to remind him that time is up. 

[then]

“You need what?”

Namjoon’s smile turns shy at Hoseok’s tone. Of all the things that Hoseok could have anticipated Namjoon would ask him for, of all the potential items that he’s been commissioned by the taller man, this was never something he expected.

Though maybe he should have.

“-you know her better than anyone, y’know, and no one can craft like you, Hobi-”

The nickname sounds wrong, suddenly; like poison on Namjoon’s lips, but Hoseok just plasters on his smile again, the one he saves for truly difficult customers who try his patience, and he prays Namjoon doesn’t recognize it. 

“No, I get it, yeah.”

“I just...it needs to be perfect. And you’re the only one that I trust to make it perfect.” Hoseok’s heart twinges in his chest, and he can feel the roots moving in his lungs. “I’ll pay you whatever you want, too, cost isn’t a factor, it just needs to be-”

“Perfect,” Hoseok finishes. Namjoon smiles again, sheepish, and nods. “It’s fine, I’ll make it. No charge.”

“Hobi, I can’t ask you to do that, not for free-”

“You didn’t,” Hoseok insists. “I’m offering. Consider it a...gift.” Namjoon’s smile is blinding, and he really must trust Hoseok with this, because he’s heading out just a few minutes after, already on the phone with you because the two of you are meeting for lunch. 

He doesn’t know why he’s surprised. It makes sense. It’s been years. Isn’t that the usual time people start to expect this kind of thing? 

A voice in the back of his head, bitter and cruel, tells him that he should have charged Namjoon. Should have made him pay an exorbitant amount, enough to keep the shop running through the months of the slow season, enough to help heal the wound in Hoseok’s heart, but he brushes it off. It wouldn’t have felt right, charging for this. 

Not when he’s had the design sitting in his head since he wrapped that first stone with wire, since he first learned how to make this jewelry. Not when he’s had pages upon pages of designs drawn out for years, since before he even owned his own shop. 

That was never his to design, though, he reminds himself as he heads into the workshop. He had no right to that design. 

Just like he has no right to you. 

[then]

Later, weeks and weeks later, In the darkness of his apartment, Hoseok cries. 

Hoseok cries for all the things he’s never said, all the things he’ll never do, all of the things that you don’t know. He cries for the late nights together and the impromptu adventures and the panicked phone calls. He’s been so blind, he’s refused to see it, he knows. It’s all been waning, all put on the backburner in favor of him. 

He’s the one you call when air can’t make it to your lungs. He’s the one you pull from work in the dead of night to make him sleep. He’s the one that gets to wraps his arms around you while you watch the newest episode of whatever show you’re obsessed with lately. It’s all him, and it will never be Hoseok, no matter how hard he wishes, because he’s too late. 

He spent so long obsessed with maybe. Maybe you’ll love him back, maybe it’ll ruin the friendship, maybe you’ll realize. For years and years, he said maybe, and now it’s too late, because you’re going to be saying yes to another man’s question, and Hoseok will be left in the darkness, no longer able to look at the stars in your eyes because you’ll be looking at him. 

For the first time in his life, Hoseok hates. He hates you for not realizing that he loves you; he hates Namjoon for taking the chance and asking you out; he hates the flowers growing in his chest that are just further proof that he’s alone in his feelings. Mostly, though…

Mostly, Hoseok hates himself, he realizes as he crumples against the wall of his living room. He hates himself for not taking the risk that Namjoon did, for not putting it all out there so that you could give him whatever kind of closure would come. 

And it’s there, sitting on his floor, surrounded by the remains of too many projects that he spent too long on that you’ll now never see, that he first begins to consider it. Everyone knows about the surgery, everyone knows that you can get the flowers removed, but that it comes with a cost. He stares, past his tears, past the colorful crystal remnants at his feet, and he considers. 

There’s already a numbness spreading through his body; it follows the same path as the roots of the flowers in his lungs, it runs parallel to the petals and seeds, and it only serves to highlight the painful ache that his feelings have caused. He’s already becoming numb to it, so why not? He may lose the ability to love forever, yes, but he can still be your friend. He can still watch you marry another man, this time without the itch in his throat and the flowers in his bile. So why shouldn’t he?

His phone rings, and he already knows it’s you. Not by the specialized ringtone - the only custom one in his entire contact list - and not by the blinking light that’s sure to wake him up in the middle of the night. No, he knows it’s you, because he knows that there’s no way Namjoon could have resisted the temptation to ask you tonight. He’s pictured what you’d look like a hundred thousand times, knows exactly how bright your smile would be as you said yes, how soft the tears would feel as he wiped them away, he knows. 

And now you’re calling him, to tell him the great news, or maybe scold him for not giving you a heads up about it in the first place since he’s the one that made the ring. Either way, you’re on the other end of that ringing, ready to tell him about the happiest night of your life, and Hoseok can’t…

He can’t resist it. It’s autopilot as he drags himself to where his phone is still ringing, and it’s only after a deep and shaky breath that he answers it. 

You don’t even give him time to speak for you’re launching into your squeals and happy giggles and how Namjoon did it, and Hoseok feels a reluctant smile cross his features. It only grows when you start to gush about the ring, complimenting his skill, and he can feel a bud trying to make its way up his throat, so he mutes his phone. He doesn’t want you to hear as he rushes to the kitchen sink, as he chokes and coughs and gags and eventually spits out a nearly whole sunflower. 

It’s not a big one, maybe an inch or so in diameter, and not fully bloomed, but it’s there, and Hoseok knows it’s more of a death sentence than anything. 

“Hobi? Are you there?” 

He wipes his mouth and clears his throat and leaves the flower in the sink with its red-stained petals so that he can unmute his phone. 

“Yeah, Starshine, I’m here.”

[now]

In the alley beside your wedding, Hoseok coughs. He coughs and he gags and he chokes, until the ground is littered with flower petals that aren’t from your bouquets, and blood drops and tears. He chokes until he can’t breathe anymore, until he has to reach in and pull the flower from his throat before he really does die, and it makes him shudder when he sees that it’s nearly fully formed, almost completely bloomed and everything.

He doesn’t think he’ll make it through the next one.

He stands up, wiping his mouth on the sleeve of the red suit he chose for this exact reason, and he looks through the window, to the space where you should be dancing with Namjoon. 

You aren’t, though. You’re watching him, brows drawn together, confused, and you’re saying something that he can’t quite make out through the glass. 

Fear strikes his heart. Fear that you saw everything, that you know everything, but directly after it comes relief, because he knows now. He knows what he needs to do, because he doesn’t think he can bear to have you watch him die, but he doesn’t think he can bear not to love you anymore, either; no matter what, he’s lost you, and that knowledge solidifies his decision. He holds a hand over his chest, and you mirror him, your fingers closing around the pendant he made so, so long ago.

You turn, looking for someone - Namjoon, maybe, or Jimin, to ask what’s wrong with him, and he takes the opportunity. He heads out of the alley, as fast as his legs can carry him, because he knows. 

When you finally make it into the alley, you don’t understand. Your best friend, your best man, is nowhere to be found. In his wake are flower petals, drawn out by the wind. 

One catches your eye, and you pick it up. It’s soft against your fingertips, and you frown when you see the red on it. 

You don’t ever see Hoseok again.