#Kenshi: MOTHERFUCKER THAT IS MY DAD!

[mikka-minns]

Kenshi and Hanzo are hanging out while Kuai is doing something (his job probably)

Hanzo, about Kuai: I could take him

Kenshi:pffft! No way! Even with your powers, you couldnt heal for WEEKS.

Hanzo:

Kenshi:

Hanzo:

Kenshi: You meant.. In a fight.. Right?

Hanzo:

Kenshi:... EW! EW! EEEEEW-!

[puissantveil]

MK1 Live reaction again (CW: organized crime, non-consensual medical procedure, and unacceptably large needles)

After Kitana gets done incredibly dirty and Raiden defeats the beefiest dude on the roster despite being just the cutest little guy, and Geras talks to his de facto dad:

Johnny's comments about the Yakuza cross the line from his usual joking to genuinely being an insensitive dick. I kept waiting for Kenshi to turn around and give him an ass chewing. When he finally did, I was disappointed by the lack of yelling.

"I grew up in that life and I never understood it. Why my gain required other people's pain." "I got out. I need my clan out, too. We can't be part of their crimes any longer." Am I the only one drawing parallels between his description of the Yakuza and systemic oppression?

Wait, what's going on here? It looks like the Tarkatans are fighting some Outworld military grunts?

Johnny Cage being a dick again.

oh god baraka fuck fuck no shang tsung you motherfucking piece of shit

YOU CAN DO IT BARAKA YOU CAN BREAK THOSE CUFFS

I thought the lower half of Shang Tsung walking through the crowd was a woman at first lmao

I do not like that needle, for the love of god Shang Tsung put that fucking thing away

LET BARAKA GO YOU SACKS OF SHIT

Forcing him onto the ground by kicking his own feet out from under him? Damn. Brutal.

I predicted he was gonna get jabbed in the spine, didn't make it any less wince-inducing.*

Shang Tsung's fighting stance is so elegant for someone who just pissed off a ball of teeth and resentment

omfg Kenshi just fucking comes up from the back like he's trying to restrain his drunk bro instead of subdue a living biohazard

Very clever, Shang Tsung. Very clever. Too bad it didn't save you.

"The disease is not easily gotten, but you can't risk more close exposure." Curious. I've been wondering how Tarkat is spread.

"[Shang Tsung] comes back each month to harvest [my bone marrow]." There's a really dark joke about paying rent somewhere in there.

Nice touch to have him check the crowd's reaction. He knows shit is going to go down if they disagree.

[malicedragoness]

Humphf. This just deleted my ask. I shall try again. Top 5 'Take me now Daddy/Mummy'. Top 5 'KILL ME NOW'. And why :D

So this will be multi-fandom. 

Top 5 Take Me Nows (in no particular order)

1. Kenshi Takahashi ‘Mortal Kombat’ - The lithe build, black hair, telekinetic/telepathy powers. It’s all just so attractive. He’s polite but he has a little snark that you wouldn’t expect fro him. When he called Tri-borg an asshole it had me rolling! And when Jacqui told him he has “less fart jokes” than Johnny! So he CAN be immature and tell some stupid jokes. And I’m juvenile enough to laugh at that shit.

Was he a great dad to Takeda? No. He is trying to reconnect, and it still doesn’t make up for time lost. I do commend him for growing up and admitting his faults to his son and try to be in his future now. But the issues between them is going to take a lot of time and patience to deal with. I wish MK would incorporate something like that in game. *sighs*

But in conclusion. Yes, he can get it in.

2. Cullen ‘Dragon Age’ Series - He’s such a sweetheart and so polite to women. And watching him through 3 games, he changes so much. He went from shy Chantry Templar to paranoid about mages in Origins. DA2 He was the Knight commander’s right hand man, and then saw how corrupted the Chantry system and Meredith was. And in Inquisition, you now see the end result after 10 years and he’s now commanding an army outside the Chantry’s influence. He’s had a lot of character development and it’s a wonderful result.

3. Geralt ‘The Witcher’ - OK. OK! OK! THIS motherfucker can totally get it in! He’s banged a lot women in his games, and a few monsters or two (vampires, succubus, etc.). He knows what he’s doing. And those scars? *faints* I’m fucking dead.

4. Jarlaxle ‘Drizzt Do’Urden’ book sagas - This is a book character I’ve been following since middle school. (And I’m now almost 30). I have an unashamed thing for elves. Especially dark elves. And Jarlaxle is so different from them all. Just about every piece of clothing he has is enchanted. His rainbow cloak, big ass hat, pirate eye patch, his boots. It’s all enchanted with magic and he’s got the charisma to boot. And elves live a long time... so you know he’s got the experience. ;)

5. Sev RC1207 ‘Star Wars: Republic Commando’ video game - I’m just gonna say it. ANY of the clones can get it. But more so Sev can get it! This is one of my favorite games in the world. I can sit down and play it at any time, and it holds a special place in my heart. Sev is just a badass mofo. And the way Karen Traviss describes the clones in her book series (which is sadly not canon anymore) the clones are ripped AF. Sev can get it. No doubt.

Honorable mentions: Erron Black and Blackwall

Top 5 Kill Me Nows (in no particular order) So I took this more as what annoys me in games every time I encounter them. LOL

1. Sloth Demon in the Circle Tower ‘Dragon Age: Origins’ - I HATE having to go through that goddamn dream sequence every time I decide to play a new character. I get to this part and I’m like “fucking kill me!”

2. Letho ’Witcher 2′ - Having to fight this fucker was difficult! I died so many times it wasn’t even funny! (Also, he could get it in)

3. Shao Kahn ‘Mortal Kombat’ - Every time I see him, it’s just the typical villain. Powerful dude wants to be ruler, super fucking evil for no reason other than wanting power, and will kill bitches and take them as concubines. It’s so been done before! “Again. A-fucking-gain. Nothing new. Nothing change. Same old shit. Same old fucking shit!”

4. Every time someone mentions a ‘paradox’ in the Legacy of Kain Series - I loved this series growing up, but all the fucking time travel and paradoxes made it confusing AF! Love the games. But goddamn I don’t think the writers knew what the fuck was going on.

5. Having to go mine planets in Mass Effect 2 - Oh, you don’t want your team to die? Better spend some hours mining planets to upgrade your ship or your fucking crew will die. Oh, and let’s not forget, it’s super boring. -_-

Sorry, I just had to air my grievances.