#KJHDBKHBSD this site was so great pre-diagnosis for its positivity abt autism but now im like wow it actually sucks (autism not tumblr) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

immortalsins · 10 months ago

Text

i am so serious i need to find some tips for autistic people to get stuff done when all passion has gone out the window. past exam seasons i haven't had much of a focus for my energy, so whilst it's hard to study like that, i can kind of concentrate everything on work. this time all i can think of is something unrelated (my silly bands) and logically i know that this is my whole degree at stake but autistically i can't get myself to do it. this is so stupid to type out but i'm realising that discipline means nothing to autistic obsession

#is this what a dsa-approved support mentor is for #should i show up to a meeting for the first time and say hey i really like this music which unfortunately has lore and fiction attached #so now i can't do my engineering #help. somehow i expected myself at age 21 to be able to not slip into obsession like this and it's honestly embarrassing to admit that i do #i'm over on my sideblog like 'yeah haha great music and sex/y guy' but it's always so much more than that #like something i want to get lost in completely #ngl i hate the term 'special interest' because it makes me feel like a child #and i've always seen it talked about as something positive #but to me it's really not #going to say something soo cringe pathetic but sometimes i hate whatever currently has my attention in a death grip because i wish #that i cared this much about something real #my education and social life #sports etc #i did part 2 of a medical trail today. had experimental drugs injected in me. that's a big event #got home and haven't thought about it once because i'm just here listening to music and pretending like life is paused #KJHDBKHBSD this site was so great pre-diagnosis for its positivity abt autism but now im like wow it actually sucks (autism not tumblr)#if i were just a little more severe i could be obsessed with electronic circuits like i'm supposed to be #but noo #😭😭😭😭 rant over #... i'm going to look at some band posts

3 notes · View notes