#Jules answers

[loucifersbitch]

Number 44 Cheap for Bucktommy

"You don't get to cheapen what we had."

Tommy says it evenly, a quiet rage burning in his eyes. He's not angry, Buck doesn't think. More hurt than anything else. And isn't that a punch to the gut?

"I'm not saying that, Tommy. Nothing about what we had was cheap. I'm only pointing out that we were obviously in two very different places when it came to how we felt about each other."

"Hm," Tommy hums noncommittally. "I think maybe you should just go, Buck."

Another gut punch. The only reason he's in Tommy's house is to return the box of things that's been sitting next to Buck's front door for more than two months.

"I feel like I'm saying everything wrong here," Buck tries. "I just want to talk to you, Tommy."

"I don't want to talk to you," he says, ending with a heavy sigh. "I can't do this with you."

"Listen, I know you didn't love me the way I love you, but that doesn't mean w-"

"What?"

Buck snaps his jaw shut, puzzled. He tips his head.

"What, 'what?'"

"You think I don't -"

Tommy has started pacing, running rough fingers through his hair as he gets more worked up. Finally he comes to a stop in front of Buck, nearly panting as he meets him head-on.

"I love you so much that it nearly killed me to walk away - almost literally."

"What?!"

"Let me finish," he says calmly. "I love you so much that I had to walk away. I've never felt this way about anyone, and that scares the absolute shit out of me." He laughs humorlessly. "I knew I'd just keep falling more in love with you, and then where would I be? When you finally realized you were settling for the first guy you dated and dumped me to go find someone better, I don't -" he exhales shakily, "- I don't know if I could've survived that. So I walked away while I could still scrape myself off the floor."

Buck is frozen where he stands. He's trying to process everything Tommy just said, and he allows himself the briefest moment to consider that Tommy's right.

Sighing and turning away, Tommy says, "I think I'm just not made to be loved long-term."

That gets Buck to finally unfreeze.

"You dumbass," he says. Tommy turns back to him as his eyebrows shoot up, but Buck ignores the look on his face. "You're just scared. And you're making us both pay for it." He grabs Tommy's arm to stop him from turning away again. "I'm not some kid who's new to love, Tommy. I'm 33. I've been in love before, and I know what it feels like to lose it. But that's not an excuse not to try. And I'm not saying it'll be easy every day, but I want to work at it with you. Especially with you," he emphasizes.

"Evan," Tommy sighs, "I'm not good at any of this. Loving you? That part's easy. But I don't - I don't know how to let myself be loved."

"Okay, well," Buck pulls him closer, and Tommy doesn't resist, a smile twitching at the corner of his mouth, "I think you can learn. You'll have to because I'm gonna love you anyway."

Send me a number and I’ll write a micro story using the word or phrase

[bbutterflies]

A-adrino... spiderman kiss...

I will raise u one better

NINOIR spiderman kiss…

[kinkykinard]

hi! continuing a positivity chain started by @thatmexisaurusrex! what are five cute headcanons you have about BuckTommy or Tommy? <3

omg @godlightbuckley and were JUST talking about coming up with bucktommy headcanons because i saw this going around and was like 'not that anyone is going to ask me but if they do, i need to be prepared' hahaha

let's see what i can come up with!

buck is an early bird. he loves getting up at the crack of dawn to start his day. tommy, on the other hand, would sleep in every day if he could. waking up at the crack of dawn when he feels buck roll over isn't so bad, though, especially when he reaches out to wrap his arms around buck and buck melts against his chest. buck's feigned protests fall on deaf ears as tommy grunts and buries his face in the crook of buck's shoulder, brushing a feather-light kiss over buck's skin.

ever since that one call with the armed chicken, tommy's been nervous around them. not that he's particularly concerned he'll ever come across another one with a knife, his mind just made some strong, if odd, associations that night and he's never had the opportunity to challenge them. so of course buck takes it upon himself to provide exposure therapy the next time he gets to babysit jee-yun. tommy is admittedly concerned for all of their safety as they step into the petting zoo paddock and jee immediately beelines for a nearby black silkie but buck gives his hand a gentle squeeze that says come on and a look that says you're safe with me and so tommy goes. by the end of the visit, he can't say that his fear is cured, but he's more sure than ever that he would follow buck wherever he wanted to go and that as long as he has buck, things are going to be just fine.

buck has a close call at work. again. and when bobby's instincts are the only thing he has to go on in telling buck to get checked out, buck takes the lack of official regulation as an out to skip yet another trip to the ER. unfortunately for him, eddie's got tommy on speed dial and in the time it takes buck to change into his civvies and jump into his jeep, eddie's given tommy the low down on the whole situation. buck doesn't suspect a thing as he walks into tommy's living room fifteen minutes later, though he supposes he should have given eddie's uncharacteristic lack of support in bobby's favor. his first instinct on seeing the first aid kit tommy has laid out on the coffee table is to make excuses, to weasel his way out of a once-over. when tommy tilts his head just a little bit, though, gives him that look, and a soft little evan, buck knows he's done for. he allows himself to be led to the couch, settled on the middle cushion, undressed, and carefully poked, prodded, and examined until tommy is unshakeably certain that he's okay. it's not all bad, though; the i'm glad you're okay sex they have afterward is one hell of a reward and buck would be a liar if he said he wasn't prepared to be a good boy all over again the next time around.

tommy loves to eat, and while he doesn't mind cooking, either, it's definitely not his favorite pastime. which is why when buck realizes that food is definitely a love language for tommy, he takes on the mantle of head chef at chez tommy. tommy insists he doesn't have to cook all the time, but buck is more than happy to do it. with all the lessons bobby's given him, the kitchen has become a sort of sanctuary for him. the busy work of finely dicing vegetables for a mirepoix and stirring seasonings into a bubbling pot of pommarola quiets something in him, and he loves having tommy by his side to help out with the less involved tasks and taste test whatever he's working on. his absolute favorite nights in the kitchen, though, are the ones where tommy's having a hard day. a bad call, a particularly devastating fire, a grueling day spent running on little food and even less sleep. on those nights, he gets to pour all of his love, care, and concern into tommy's absolute favorite dishes. the turkey, spinach, and ricotta-stuffed cannelloni that tommy loves most of all is a particularly pain-staking endeavor but it's worth every second of effort that goes into it for the soft, nostalgic smile tommy gets when he takes his first bite. it's a kinard family recipe that was handed down from his paternal grandmother and one day, over a plate of it, with his defenses down and his conviction that buck is really it for him, he opens up to tell buck all the things that shaped him, the ones he's never told another living soul.

being a firefighter and pilot had never been tommy's dream. he'd never really landed on one, in all honesty, though he'd considered everything from mechanics to law to professional athletics in his youth. when the time to make his choice had rolled around, however, all he wanted was to escape the turmoil at home and a presentation by a recruiter at school promised him a life of valor, honor, and camaraderie if he enlisted in the army, so he took the out. he'd hated every second of it and had cut and run the second he was able there, too. with bills to pay and the physical conditioning required of a firefighter at the ready, it was an easy choice to sign up for the academy soon thereafter. the lafd promised him the one thing he did miss about the army - the brotherhood, the found family - and while getting his start under captain gerrard hadn't been ideal, he'd eventually found his footing. now, doing meaningful, rewarding work alongside people he would follow to hell and back, surrounded by friends that are closer to him than his family ever was, and with the love of his life by his side, he can't imagine ever doing anything else.

And a bonus NSFW headcanon!

does that make this a 5+1?

buck loves how intimate being penetrated is. sure, he's been pegged before, but he had no idea how different the real thing would be. having tommy inside of him makes him feel complete in a way that nothing else ever has, and the intimacy of the moments where their bodies are connected, where tommy is seated fully inside of him, makes his heart skip and his soul ache with the enormity of it. in those moments, he loves reaching down between their bodies to feel where they're joined, to appreciate the way that his body yields to tommy's cock. when it's over, when he's made a mess of himself and tommy has spilled inside of him, buck always asks tommy to stay inside just a little longer, to keep the circuit closed so that he can marvel at how close they are, at how he isn't sure where tommy ends and where he begins anymore. and tommy is always happy to oblige.

[lemonsoured]

Wishing you luck with your short film, and to be free of the patty drama soon at least. She's a more well known face in the transfem community and a terrible representation of us. Hoping she figures her shit out. more so Hoping you get to move past all this and enjoy the fruits of your own passions and labors.

Hello, and thank you for the supportive sentiment. I'm hoping to walk away from all this as soon as possible. And please don't think that Taxxon is in any way a representative of trans women/transfems aside from her role as an influencer. Especially in the political climate we're in, I want this to be viewed separate from her identity. You and other trans women/fems should not have to feel like you have to answer for her. Please take care of yourself. <3

[thr4shit]

Hopefully you can connect to your new name Jules. Even though you think everyone hates you, I can reassure you not everyone does.

You're not your sorce. You're a different person and you do matter.

I really hope you can eventually feel better about yourself especially with the new name.

I'll always be here to support y'all, all of you :3

-Mystery ghost

Thanks for that, really.

It means a lot.

And yeah, I was maybe being a bit dramatic when I said EVERYONE, but there's still a fair chunk of people.

But yknow what? Fuck em. I'm not the same guy.

I'm not him. I'm Jules. I'm my own person.

But thank you, really for being here and supporting us. It's nice, it's different. We'll be here to support you, too. Promise.

On a silly note, I'm actually glad Jules was the name that won. It was one of my top choices. Haha.

[bigbigpushes]

This is such a good inconvenient birth, I don't know if you've already read it... https://archive.transformativeworks.org/works/54016570

I beg the question, would you write for fandoms such as X Files?

I think I have read it before.

I’d consider writing for fandoms for sure but it would have to be fandoms I’m more familiar with and I’m afraid x files isn’t one I know well.

[julesart04]

I am so not kidding this last piece of regulus? That’s HIM!!! That’s him. His expression!! The emotion in his eyes!!!!! I’m in love thank you so much for creating him and letting me witness his beauty lmao

😂😩 thank you so so much!!! Comments and messages like this make me so happy!! I'm just really glad you like it, I love drawing him no matter what but when other people like it I just - asdfgfadaffs.

Th post we’re talking about 👇

[feathersontheclyde]

“Trust me, you don’t want me near a stove.” - Frankie to Jules

" Well how many fires have you caused while you were left unsupervised? I feel like anything under five is good enough for me. " She laughs. " I'm willing to risk it. "

[hotchxreid]

spencer reid needs his nipples sucked

Yes he does, anon

He needs his cute little nipples sucked raw until even a cool breath against them burns 😋🥵

Boy genius should have to suffer through a whole day at work with his pink, sensitive little tits that make him hiss in pleasure/pain when they so much as brush against his shirt 🥰🥰

[loucifersbitch]

You got a Lou message 🥹 I’m so happy for you! Hope he knows how much he is loved 🥰

i don't mind sharing this one 🥰 i had told him that the group chat loved the latest episode and went absolutely wild whenever Tommy was in a scene

he is the sweetest man, and based on the few messages i've gotten, he knows he's loved and appreciated by so many of us

[bbutterflies]

im going to combine our respective favorite things ever. emoverse adrino.

I will do u one better

[kinkykinard]

Okay, spreading some positivity!! And feel free to send this to other folks too 🥰 What is your goofiest BuckTommy headcanon?

tommy is for sure the absentminded type, constantly misplacing his keys, his phone, other important items, while buck has a knack for recalling the last place he'd seen them all. any time tommy can't find something, all he has to do is text buck and buck will come back at him with "junk drawer, middle third, in the basket with the elastic bands" and sure enough, he's always right ♥

[lemonsoured]

Can We Watch The Film Anywhere Online After The Showing? I'd Like To Support It But Am Not Able To Travel

It's likely going to be a little while before I can release the re-scored version, but I do plan to post it on Youtube/Vimeo once it's complete. I'll announce it on my socmed accounts once the time comes.

[wandas-luvr]

Brunette Wanda or Redhead Wanda?

i am actually president of the brunette wanda fanclub if u didn't alr know

[julesthoughts]

you are gorgeous, awesome and beautiful ♡

Oh god, nooooo. Thank you so much, dear anon! 🥺🧡

[julesart04]

Hi!!! Irises, Common Boneset and Lily please 🫶🏻

Thank you sm! 😊✨

Irises - hmmmm this is tricky because I'm someone who tends to hold their cards quite close. I guess the easiest answer is my mum but the truth is probably just myself

Common Boneset - University!! I start my illustration degree in September and I cannot wait. I'm counting down the days 😅

Lilies - my best friend was a girl in my class throughout all of primary school. I say best friend but in reality she was my only friend. I absolutely adored her and it was a kind of co-dependent relationship. We became friends when we were 6 and stayed (sort of) friends until we were 16. We went to separate high schools when we were 11 which really drove a wedge between us. We also had several major arguments which pushed us further apart. Last I heard she was dating, and living with, one of the guys who bullied me in high school so... 😂