#John Thorpe

[bethanydelleman]

The perfect text quote for John Thorpe doesn't ex-

[frozenwolftemplar]

Someone needs to make a 21st-century-set Northanger Abbey if for no other reason than to curse the world with the insufferable danger to humanity that is John Thorpe with a sports car.

[firawren]

Northanger Abbey text posts

[thoumpingground]

Okay, obviously I get why Emma gets to be the resident Disaster Matchmaker TM, but really John Thorpe gives her several runs for her money. He beats her in numbers of matches, execution, and production value accidentaly. Emma only managed to get Harriet's heart broken - twice. Thorpe's got it down to the details: he got Cathy the guy and a swoon worthy proposal. Cause if left to his own devices, Henry would have put together something sweet and heartfelt but simple, and Cathy would have been very happy of course, but she clearly doesn't mind a little bit of ✨romance✨. Thanks to Thorpe, she gets to brag forever that her husband loved her so much he bore being disowned and rode 70 miles on a horse to propose against his father's will.

Thorpe might be shooting in the dark, and aiming for the complete opposite goal, but d-mn it, he gets results, and I think he deserves to be the Austen Extended Universe Hipercompetent Matchmaking Menace TM. Not the least because, unlike Emma and every other Austen romantic rival, he has nothing else going for him.

[phireads]

About a third of the way through Northanger Abbey and can John Thorpe just stop??? I actually despise him

[hotjaneaustenmenpoll]

[warrioreowynofrohan]

Read Northanger Abbey the other day and it is funny on so many levels.

First - imagine, 200 years later, if Twilight has fallen into obscurity but a book satirizing Twilight is still well-known and the source of most of some people’s knowledge of the genre. (Note: Should I read The Mysteries of Udolpho, just out of curiosity?)

Second - I don’t favour modern retellings of Sense and Sensibility or Pride and Prejudice because the plot and characterizations are so fundamentally connected to the time period - to the nature of marriage as an economic arrangement and the lack of options for gentlewomen to earn an independent living - that removing that element to focus just on the romance cuts out something central to the book. (Emma is independently wealthy, which is why a modern ‘retelling’ of the book like Clueless works better than for P&P or S&S.)

Northanger Abbey? Is perfect for a modern retelling. A teenage girl goes on a summer vacation, meets a new bestie, gets a crush, dives into Twilight, becomes convinced on the most flimsy of evidence that her new crush’s family are vampires. The exact nature of General Tilney’s misunderstanding about her can be finessed, and she and Henry don’t marry at the end they just start dating, but everything else works, down to the small details! Deciding which friends you want to hang out with, keeping your commitments to people, the pain of finding out that someone you trusted isn’t trustworthy! Henry Tilney going on a tear about the misuse of ‘literally’ or ‘like’! The main stories and conflicts of the novel fit easily into the present day.

Third - yes, Catherine’s Gothic assumptions and ideas are very funny, but General Tilney makes assumptions that are nearly as ridiculous about her, on just as little evidence, and with the benefit of far more life experience! He decides she’s madly wealthy and assiduously seeks to attract her for his son on the word of one guy - one fratbro no less, that’s not even an anachronism, John Thorpe is a fratbro - and then, when the same guy changes his story to ‘no, she’s practically destitute’, the general, instead of considering that maybe this dude is an unreliable source, immediately takes it as truth instead. Catherine’s credulity is driven by fantasy novels, General Tilney’s by worldliness, but they contrast each other very well!

[besotted-with-austen]

Isabella Thorpe: -but enough about me and James, my dear Catherine! Do tell, is there a gentleman that you find particularly handsome?

Catherine Morland: *stumped* sorry, what?

Isabella Thorpe: or you do not want to tell me?

Catherine Morland: that is not-

Isabella Thorpe: of course I understand that a lady has to keep some secrets, but we are so very close, are we not?

Catherine Morland: obviously, but-

Isabella Thorpe: *ready to open the waterworks* could you not make me your confidant? Your devoted friend Isabella?

Catherine Morland: *slowly* well-

Catherine Morland: I guess at the moment I find Valancourt very fascinating, but there is something about Vincenzo that always stuck with me-

Isabella Thorpe: *laughing* sweetie, I meant a real gentleman, not an imaginary one!

Catherine Morland:

Catherine Morland: oooooooh!

Isabella Thorpe: maybe someone we both know? That you met here?

Catherine Morland: *shocked* you know?

Isabella Thorpe: how could I not, when you pass so much time together? And he is so thoughtful, so attentive to your needs! No wonder you are head over heels!

Catherine Morland: *worried* am I so obvious?

Isabella Thorpe: *exaggerated* do not fret-I noticed because I am a woman, he most definitely has no idea yet!

Catherine Morland: *relieved* oh thank Goodness, I do not know if I am ready to tell Mr Tilney that I fancy him!

[bethanydelleman]

One text post for each dubious male character in each Austen novel

George Wickham, Pride & Prejudice

Mr. Elliot, Persuasion

John Thorpe, Northanger Abbey

John Willoughby, Sense & Sensibility

Henry Crawford, Mansfield Park

Frank Churchill, Emma

Bonus:

Jane Austen Text Posts

[firawren]

Anything is possible when you're the heroine of a novel!

(Here's the original ad, you know you want to watch it again)

[dimity-lawn]

[whenthegoldrays]

@inardentdaylight said something too funny to be left in the comment section of my post:

Also I didn't realize John Thorpe was their matchmaker 😭 I'm sure that although he would hate that it happened, if someone told him that he was kind of responsible for Henry & Catherine spending more time together, he would be like ‘yeAh I lOoKEd at tHeM anD tHoUGht ThEY'd Be CUte’

[elenion-et-al]

Northanger Abbey thoughts and summary

Chapter 7

Here we meet John Thorpe... I do not like John Thorpe.

The whole time I was reading the chapter, my eyebrows were furrowed and I realised I had a look of disdain.

This man is the very kind I would like to keep away from at all cost.

Okay, first of all, he had zero care for his horse! Poor horse. Deserved better life than that. Second, we was so quick to dismiss Catherine's interest in novels. Wait, he didn't just dismiss it. He insulted them and thought so lowly of it. Excuse me?!?!?!

Ooooh I was seething reading this chapter. I AM NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO HIS NEXT APPEARANCE.

Bring back Henry 🥲

[sweetiepie08]

Ditching John Thorpe would feel like divorcing Tom Cruise.

[bethanydelleman]

I’m reading Northanger Abbey for the first time and I can’t believe how annoying the Thorpes are omg

Isn't it wonderful that Jane Austen wrote characters so annoyingly relatable that we are still mad at them 200 years later?

Like you could put this sentence in the mouth of some arrogant car guy today and it would be almost exactly the same:

“Curricle-hung, you see; seat, trunk, sword-case, splashing-board, lamps, silver moulding, all you see complete; the iron-work as good as new, or better. He asked fifty guineas; I closed with him directly, threw down the money, and the carriage was mine.”

Genius writing!

[firawren]

Attention John Thorpe: