#John Fashanu opens up on the regret of his brother Justin’s death

torentialtribute · 6 years ago

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John Fashanu opens up on the regret of his brother Justin’s death

The year was 1988 and John Fashanu was in his element.

The center of Wimbledon was in the glorious Dorchester Hotel and celebrated with his teammates after their stunning victory in the FA Cup .

The victory over Liverpool that day was one of the biggest setbacks in the history of the competition and the celebrations were in full swing.

[Factbook] They laughed and joked about the fact that his brother Justin was gay. John says: & # 39; At the time, everyone who said my brother was gay was fighting them. Now you wouldn't think twice about it. But then it was an insult to my family name. One of my brothers was gay. Are you mad? "

Ten years later, Justin, the first £ 1 million black football player – and the first openly gay professional – killed himself, a victim of racism and homophobia.

& # 39; It was a terrible day & # 39 ;, John adds, who was a year younger than his brother. & # 39; Justin struggled with a number of personal demons in his life, it is clear that issues surrounding his sexuality were at the heart of his problems

& # 39; This is a situation that belies and underlines. It is a sad reflection of the ongoing problems surrounding professional football that, 20 years after Justin's death, there is no openly gay football player in the Premier League. .

John now regrets that he was part of the culture that sentenced his brother to death. He and his oldest daughter Amal, a 29-year-old TV presenter.

He and his eldest daughter Amal, the 29-year-old TV presenter and bag designer, launch a foundation on April 1 in an effort to eradicate homophobia in football and the number of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transsexual players (LGBT) in the sport.

Backed by the Professional Footballers Association and FIFA, the Justin Fashanu Foundation will collaborate with professional organizations in organizing fundraisers and attracting sponsorships in an effort to eliminate prejudices in sports.

While John will be the figurehead of the organization, Amal plans plans

& Our mission is to confront discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people in footba they will all be able to participate without their respect for their sexuality, & John says.

& # 39; Thirty years ago, when I was at my peak playing football, the weather was not conducive. for someone to come out. It was not beneficial for someone to say that they were bisexual, homosexual, LGBT.

Fashanu, 56, I readily admit that I have acted as a & # 39; monster & # 39 for his brother after he discovered that he was gay in 1990. He initially did not believe the gossip that Justin was gay but after his brother confirmed the rumors, I paid him £ 75,000 to remain silent

then Justin in the sun came under the heading & # 39; £ 1million Football Star: I am Gay & # 39; he felt betrayed.

[InitiallybelievesIdonotthinkhe'saysFashanandyouperformsAcademieinNigeria'areyougay'Ithought'StopshowingoffYou'retryingtotakemygloryYou'renotgoingtodoitI'mtheNo1soccerplayerI'vetakenyourpositionI'minthePremierLeaguenowandplayforEnglandYouarenowaansmokinghaveinjuriesandyoujustwanttograbmyplatform'

That was what I thought. So I said: & # 39; Here I am going to give you £ 75,000 on condition that you tell everyone that you are gay because no one cares about it & # 39;

& I then had him in a beautiful hotel in central London and asked my manager to keep him there for a few weeks to calm him down. I didn't realize he was gay and sympathized with Justin. They conspired together and came up with the story of the front page in the sun.

I was furious. I thought he was a scammer, took money from me, and took money from the newspaper. I couldn't understand then – although I can now – why I thought it necessary to tell everyone and everything that he was a homosexual. After all, I am a heterosexual, but I am not going to sing that I am a heterosexual.

& # 39; Now I see the frustration and confusion that I have had to go through. He must have just given birth to his soul. But then homophobia was the rage. You could not say the word homosexuality 30 years ago. My immediate thought was to protect my brothers and sisters, protect my mother and father, and protect my loved ones around me. "

John, who scored 134 league goals in nearly 400 games at Wimbledon and four other clubs, believes it was brother rivalry that tore the brothers apart.

But when Justin was covered by England by Under-21, their circumstances changed. While he had money in his pocket, his brother was still trying to find his way. It would take another six years for John to join Wimbledon and reverse their roles. By that time, his brother's career was diminishing

& # 39; I think it was rivalry between brothers and sisters, & he said. & # 39; And then you add the football, you add the showbiz, you add the celebrity, you add the money. Oh my God. That made the relationship pretty toxic.

& # 39; Money is a very powerful influence if you don't have one. I would like to say that I would like it, and I would like to have it. good luck – but I felt irritated because he didn't support me.

In retrospect, I think I wanted to learn the hard way. He would say, "You are not going to become a freeloader, John, you are not going to sponsor me. You will work for your money." But then I didn't see it. I thought he was nasty pants. Now, 30 years later, I say, "Thank you so much for helping me understand that you have to work for your own money."

But it was very different when the tables were turned over and John became a millionaire. Then Justin asked him for money, and the dutiful younger brother, I paid. & # 39; I was very generous, & # 39; he says laughing.

& # 39; And of course I loved him. & # 39; Contrary to what was said at the time, the two brothers were not alienated when Justin died. When Justin left America after he was wrongly charged with assault, I turned to his brother. John last saw him on April 30, 1998, two days before he died.

& # 39; Sometimes we had three months, sometimes it was five months that we didn't speak & # 39 ;, John says. But the brothers would still answer the phone and abuse each other. I think I was one of the last people who actually saw him. I have come to my penthouse in St. John's & # 39; s Wood.

& # 39; The dynamics had changed so quickly that I had no money and it was loaded, that I suddenly had crazy money and that he had no money at all. & # 39;

& # 39; I actually called my mother and said that I think Justin will take his life, & # 39; he says. I saw the story. I saw that he looked like a man on a kind of downward spiral.

& I think he was lost. I think he was defeated.

It was two days later, on May 2, when John and his second wife Melissa baptized their eldest son Amir, now 21, that his brother hung himself in an abandoned garage.

& # 39; My then wife and I were arguing. & # 39;

& # 39; My wife and I were arguing about whether you want to give him Amir Justin Fashanu, & he says. & # 39; I refused because I was so stressed. Just when I changed my mind, there was a knock at the door. I opened the door and there were two police officers. They said, "Is that John Fashanu? We have bad news to tell you that your brother died." I said, "What do you mean? He's dead?"

It was so traumatic, it was so traumatic. I thought it was a kind of terrible joke that had gone wrong. The challenge was how we tell my mother Pearl, who was not so good.

We drove to her house but she said nothing. She just looked at us and burst into tears and said, "I know he's dead."

It is now more than 20 years since his brother died and John, who is building a John Fashanu residential area in Nigeria, for athletes and women, you have gone with the times. & # 39; I'm sorry I couldn't communicate better with Justin and much more often, & # 39; he adds.

& # 39; Communication stops wars. But life is too short for regret.

& # 39; We cannot go back and change the story, but we can move forward and make changes for the future. Hopefully our foundation will be a stepping stone to change.

& # 39; Justin was a great brother and achieved so many goals: he was a great athlete, the first black £ 1m football player, had the best goal of the

& # 39; He has put me in the spotlight: the high percentage of my achievements in this world is due to him. Not only was I able to film the largest television show in the world for 13 years, Gladiators, but I won the FA Cup in 1988 with Wimbledon, the Crazy Gang.

& # 39; All my achievements were phenomenal. And they wouldn't have happened without Justin. "

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