#Jango got some Sith to hunt he’s taking Obi on honeymoon to do that

[padawansuggest]

AU where Jango lives and somehow Jango and Dooku manage to get a hold of Obi-Wan at the same time and for once Jango is torn on who to go for first, arguably, Obi-Wan is the better target, seeing as Obi is less likely to hurt his son if he manages to win their fight and will likely drop Boba off with a more pandering adult to take care of him, but Dooku is Right There and he would very much like to murder him, but who knows if Obi-Wan’s family instincts will kick in and protect his ba’buir. But then. Dooku. Is just standing there. Vibrating at a frequency so high he’s almost able to perceive Qui-Gon in the force through that alone, 17 caffs into a binge on day 5 away with an annoying ghost son in his ear threatening that if he hurts Obi-Wan in any way whatsoever the first thing Qui-Gon is doing when he dies is punching him in the face and no he can’t hurt the baby clone either might as well just take a step back from this situation as a whole cause it’s not gonna go good, so, being the smart man Dooku is, Dooku just sorta shrugs (in the force, he’s so tense rn he couldn’t shrug if he tried) and proceeds to kidnap all three of them (confused preteen Boba is confused but relatively okay lmao) and that’s how Obi-Wan and Jango wake up locked inside a lovely set of ‘guest quarters’ in the Count’s palace with Boba and now they have to cohabitate with Dooku occasionally coming in to cry about how perfectly stupid Qui-Gon was as a small child and how he’d bitten So Many People and Qui-Gon says Obi-Wan bit even more as a kid than he did and Jango is just sitting here listening to a (tired??? Drunk???? Unsober. We’re calling that Unsober) Dooku cry about how perfectly feral his kids were and how most of their family is DEAD and it’s always falling to the dark side that does them in and Komari was ferally adorable as a wee one and Xanatos had been the bubbliest lil boy before Qui-Gon spoiled him too much and now Obi-Wan is somehow the most sunshine of their lineage while Obi-Wan looks on in horror at his childhood being spilled like this before mentioning that maybe Grandmaster should take a nap only to be picked up by said grandmaster and cried on because ‘he called me grandmaster! Fett did you hear that the sunshine baby called me Grandmaster!’ And Jango is like ‘god I wish I had a camera this could be so much blackmail’ and then finally Jango and Obi manage to escape with a still confused Boba (it’s his natural state) and make their way back to a very annoyed 212th where Jango is all ‘listen. I’ve thought about it. And I’ve decided I’m marrying Kenobi.’ And Obi is like ‘you are???? Why???’ ‘According to your ba’buir you’re the only good one’ and now Cody and Waxer and Boil are staging a ‘YOURE NOT MY DAD’ protesting fit and Obi-Wan is so confused at this turn of situation. Wtf.