#Jacqui twd

[minervas-wife]

TWD S1 EP5 THOUGHTS

lori grimes when ppl are in shock: :0 >:(

forgot how disjointed the atlanta group are omg

hopeful rick 🧡🧡 he will be deranged soon enough

AMY DIED ON HER BIRTHDAY IM GOING TO DIE

carols whole ass life had just been suffering omg

daryl got more southern throughout the series. he sounds so not southern in this season

jim, coughing up a lung while rick just sits there like 'lets get moving🤗'

omg last time we see morales til like season 8

the goodbye is actually so sweet with lori hugging and kissing the kids

and sophia too

so the infection makes ur bones ache too??? jim said his bones felt like glass

dale being the most emotionally intelligent character in this series 🧡🧡

god i love jacqui

jim being the first bite victim we have in our main group is hard to watch cus no one knows what to do or say yet

if i was travelling with rick and the stuff at the cdc door happened i would have made a break for it

[final-girl96]

Broken World: Chapter Sixteen

Flashback

The whole city was in total chaos. People were running in every direction, and screams and gunfire filled the air. The dead were up walking and stumbling around; how was this real life? They decided Atlanta was the best place to set up a refugee camp. Who's ever idea that was, was a fucking idiot. Things didn't take long to fall apart. Infected people got in and “turned”, they bite others, killing more, turning more people, and before anyone knew it, the whole city was being overrun.

The military was trying to get it under control, but it was no use. There were too many of them. There was a shoot to kill an order. That's exactly what I was doing; shooting the dead. It wasn't natural; the dead were walking around. I made it back into the precinct, killing anything that got in my way. I could hear the jets flying over the city, and shortly after, just as I scrambled under my desk, explosions rocked the whole city. They just bombed the city.

Center For Disease Control

Dr. Edwin Jenner. That was the man standing in front of us closing the doors behind us after a few of us ran out and got our bags. He led us to an elevator where we all piled in; It was a tight squeeze. Daryl was pushed back into the corner with his back to the wall. I was directly in front of him and almost touching him but not. Everyone else filed in though and I got bumped causing me to stumble back more and into Daryl. His left hand landed on my hip to steady and my whole body was on fire. His hand left just as fast as it came. Jenner walked into the elevator, waited for the doors to close, and then pressed one of the bottoms on the panel.

I could feel how tense Daryl was behind me; I was just as tense. I also hated being in such a small space with so many people. “Doctors always go around packing heat like that?” Daryl asked. Jenner had an M4A1 in his hands. He looked down at it then back at our group. “There were plenty left lying around. I familiarized myself. But you look harmless enough.” He looked down at Carl and smiled at him, “Except you, I’ll have to keep my eye on you.” The elevator doors opened and everyone got out.

We were led through halls, up metal stairs, and down another hall into a circular room with computers and a large screen on one wall. “VI, bring up the lights in the big room,” Jenner said, and the lights turned on. “Welcome to Zone 5.” We looked around to see an empty space. Nobody was here. “Where is everybody? The other doctors, the staff?” Rick asked. Jenner turned and looked at him. “I’m it. It’s just me here.” I shook my head, staying back from the group. “What about the person you were speaking with? VI?” Lori asked. “VI, say hello to our guests. Tell them… Welcome.”

“Hello, guests. Welcome,” An artificial intelligence voice said. “I’m all that’s left. I’m sorry,” Jenner told us. He then led us to a room where he took our blood. That was the agreement, he would run tests to make sure none of us were infected and we could stay. I sat in the chair and gave him my arm. He gave me a weak smile, cleaned the skin with an alcohol wipe, and stuck me with the needle. “You don't look happy to be here,” he said. I raised an eyebrow, “What makes you think that?” I asked. He finished filling a vial with blood and pulled the needle out, replacing it with a gauze pad. “You hung back from the others, didn't seem too surprised to know I was the only one here.” I hummed, leaned forward a little and said, “That's because I know no one would be here. I saw what happened to this place.” With that I stood up and went to stand near the door.

Jenner took Andrea’s blood for a sample. As she stood up she started to stumble a little until Jacqui caught her. “Are you okay?” Andrea nodded her head and held onto her. Jacqui looked at Jennerx who was looking a little concerned. “She hasn’t eaten in days. None of us have,” she explained. He looked around the room and nodded, then he led us to the kitchen where some of the women started to cook up dinner for everyone with the help of some of the men. There was plenty of wine and even some whiskey. When everything was done we pushed a few tables together and sat down. Jenner sat at a separate table close by.

Rick was pouring wine into Lori's cup when Dale said, “You know, in Italy, children have a little bit of wine with dinner. And in France.” She held up her glass and took a sip. “Well, when Carl is in Italy or France, he can have some then,” she said. “What’s it gonna hurt? Come on. Come on,” Rick said, trying to convince her. She agreed and gave him a little bit. He tasted it and scrunched his face up in disgust. Loro poured the rest into her glass. “That’s my boy. That’s my boy. Good boy.”

“Yuck. That tastes nasty,” Carl said. There were some laughs and chuckles from everyone. “Well, just stick to soda pop there, bud,” Shane told him. “Not you, Glenn,” Daryl said. Glenn looked around at everyone and laughed awkwardly. “What?” He asked. “Keep drinking, little man. I want to see how red your face can get,” Daryl said.

I leaned back in my chair at the end of the table beside Glenn, wine glass in my hand, swirling the dark red liquid around in the glass. Someone clinked thier glass and looked up to see Rock standing, glass raised. “It seems to me we haven’t thanked our host properly,” he said. T-Sog held his glass, “He is more than just our host,” he said, taking a drink. “Hear hear!” Dale cheered. Everyone held up a glass to toast Jenner with them. “Here’s to you, Doc, booyah!” Daryl shouted. Rick thanked the doctor and a cheer of booya's went around.

Everyone went back to eating and chatting until Shane interrupted it all. “So when are you gonna tell us what the Hell happened here, Doc? All the—the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened, where are they?” He asked. “We’re celebrating, Shane. Don’t need to do this now,” Rick told him. I let out a scuff. "Whoa, wait a second. This is why we’re here, right? This was your move—supposed to find all the answers. Instead we—” I took a deep breath, “We found him. Found one man, why? I mean I told you this was all a waste of time,” I said. I wanted to know too. I wanted to know exactly what happened. I knew this place fell the second the city erupted into chaos.

“Well, when things got bad, a lot of people just left, went off to be with their families. And when things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted,” Jenner said. I just kept looking at Rick, giving him that “I told you so” look. “Every last one?” Shane asked, narrowing his eyes at the doctor. Jenner was silent for a few seconds and then said, “No, many couldn’t face walking out the door. They… opted out. There was a rash of suicides. That was a bad time.”

“You didn’t leave. Why?” Andrea asked. Jenner looked up from his glass to look at her. “I just kept working, hoping to do some good,” he said quietly. Silence fell over the group. “Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man,” Glenn said to Shane.

[acquaesale]

“TS-19″ The Walking Dead S01E06 (2010), dir. Guy Ferland.

[atruthwebothknow]

The Walking Dead - Season One (2010)

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

Blood Ties Chapter 7

Series Masterlist

Warnings: Typical TWD violence and gore, vomiting, minor injury, confirmation of minor canonical character death

Moodboard by @dannyo000 💙

The silence inside the truck was so uncomfortable that it teetered on the border of unbearable. Daryl hadn’t spoken a single word, not even when the caravan stopped to discuss forthcoming plans and you were invited to join. He didn’t have to speak. The intense glare that could have burned a hole through Rick’s head said everything his mouth didn’t.

You noticed Jacqui’s absence at once. There was an ache in your chest at her loss. She had been kind to you the few times you had interacted. You didn’t need an explanation. She had perished at the CDC. Whether or not it had been at Jenner’s hand was irrelevant. It had been his intent to trap you all there. In the end, it would still be blood on the doctor’s hands. 

“So, we’re all in agreement? Fort Benning?” The former sheriff met the eyes of everyone as they nodded. “Alright, that’s settled. I think we need to discuss our means of travel. We’ll burn a helluva lot of fuel taking so many vehicles. Any suggestions?”

Looks were exchanged, but Dale spoke up first. “I know the RV is by far the worst on the fuel but it does provide space and a means of shelter beyond what the others do. I’m probably biased but there it is.”

“No, I think as long as we can keep the RV running, it should stay.” Lori agreed with a nod and a hand on the older man’s shoulder. 

“Alright, okay.” Rick continued. “That still leaves four others.”

“We can ditch the van. Ride in the RV.” T-Dog offered quickly. 

“I can lose the Jeep and ride with you, Lori, and Carl.” Shane leaned against the vehicle in question and awaited a response. Rick shook his head almost immediately. 

“We’ll take Carol and Sophia, keep the kids together. You can go in the RV.” 

The first emotion that passed over the other officer’s face was sour, you noticed, but swiftly turned into a compliant smile and nod. You narrowed your eyes but held your tongue. Not your circus, not your monkeys.

“M’a take the bike.” Daryl stated matter-of-factly, not even waiting for input before he dropped the tailgate of the truck. “Ya help me with this?” He waved a hand toward the truck bed with a glance at T-Dog.

“That’s good, Daryl. Real good. Lori, Carol, the kids, and I in the Cherokee. Daryl and Y/N on the bike. The rest in–”

“Just me.” The redneck interjected, not looking away from the task of unloading the bike. You didn’t need confirmation to know what he meant. 

“What?” Rick asked anyway.

“She can ride in the RV.” Daryl huffed. Rick raised his eyebrows but ended with shrugging a shoulder and moving on. 

You, however, continued staring at the archer. It wasn’t public knowledge that the baby was Daryl’s. Amidst the panic and confusion at the CDC, no one took notice of the exchanges between the two of you. You assumed he’d like to keep it that way. Assumptions were all you had to go on at the moment because the bastard was refusing to speak to you! Still, if he continued with the very obvious disdain toward you, he was going to give himself away.

“Y/N?”

“Huh?” You turned to find all other eyes on you. 

“Rick was asking if you’re okay being in the RV.” Lori was tilting her head, watching you with a look you didn’t really like. “Oh. Yeah, I’m fine wherever you want me.”

“Probably be more comfortable there.” Carol smiled that gentle smile of hers. “At some point, we’re gonna have to address the elephant in the room.” Shane’s tone was condescending. You curled your lip when he shifted to cross his arms and spit off to the side. His eyes remained on you, flickering down to your stomach and back up. You were starting to get the feeling he didn’t like you much.

Lucky for him, the feeling was mutual. “We’ve got time.” Lori interjected before you could even open your mouth. “One thing at a time. We need to find somewhere safe to stay first. Get off the road.” “She’s right.” Rick started grabbing the fuel cans and hoses to siphon the gas from the vehicles that were being left behind. The rest of the group scattered to move things and automobiles around, leaving you and Shane in a staring match. You wanted to smirk when he looked away first, granting you one last glance before disappearing around the RV.

“Anything I can do to help?” You walked up to the door of the RV as Dale stepped down. He gave you a sweet smile and traipsed out of your way, motioning to the inside. 

“You don’t need to be pulling and tugging at things. You just go on inside.” 

You snorted. “I’m pregnant, not an invalid. I can help.”

The older man was obviously torn but with a glance toward Andrea, he finally relented. Another story there, you supposed. “Maybe move some of the lighter bags and supplies from the other cars. They may have beat you to it, but that’s really all I know of that would be okay for you.” 

“Okay, I’ll check with Lori.” You smiled at him before he went about with whatever he was doing in preparation to leave. You really did appreciate his concern but you were new to the group. You had to show them that you could be an asset. It wouldn’t do for you to end up on your own with a baby on the way. You made it to the back corner of the RV before you felt eyes searing into the back of your head. Maybe Shane had seen the exchange with Dale. Glancing over your shoulder, you locked eyes with Daryl. This time, it was you who looked away first.

You had chosen to all but hide in the back of the RV, on the bed with a book that Dale had let you borrow. You weren’t really reading as much as you were listening to the exchanges between Andrea and Shane. He was showing her about maintaining a gun. When she mentioned her father, you felt a twinge of pain in your chest. 

The nausea had returned with a vengeance. Sips of water, you could handle with enough time in between. The constant rolling of your gut had you turning away from anything substantial. You knew you should eat. You needed to eat. Maybe when the next stop was made, you could ask about some crackers or something. 

Lost in your head, it wasn’t until you heard Dale’s distressed exclamation that you actually looked up, leaning out to be able to see what was going on from your hovel in the back room. 

“Oh jeez. Aw no. See a way through?” 

You tossed the book to the foot of the bed and swung your legs over the edge to get to your feet. Glenn was suggesting to turn around for a bypass but Dale quickly shot down the idea. 

“We can’t spare the fuel.”

“Jesus.” You whispered when you got your first glimpse of the disastrous cluster of cars and debris. As the RV idled, there was a pop and a white cloud drifted up in front of the windshield. “Shit.” You followed the others out the door, taking in the scene when you heard Daryl’s bike. The hunter weaved through the maze of vehicles and stopped in front of the RV. 

The others discussed options, a conversation you purposefully avoided. They were including you but having a say in things was a totally different matter. You didn’t feel like you were there yet. 

“There’s a whole bunch’a stuff we can find.” Daryl was right. The owners of the abandoned cars didn’t need the things they’d left behind in their panic. Except—not all of them had left. You could clearly see a corpse in the passenger side of a sedan. Was it a walker? Couldn’t be. It would have responded to the noise. 

“This is a graveyard. I don’t know how I feel about this.”

“I’m with Lori. It feels like—grave robbing.” While Lori’s comment went ignored, yours earned a look from Shane that made your skin crawl. He eventually sneered before his expression smoothed out and he gave the order for everyone to go searching. 

You stood still, biting your lip in hesitation. The thought of someone taking your father’s belongings from the camp just because he was dead made you see red. How could you possibly go along with this?

Maybe you could stay behind in the RV. Andrea was there, so it shouldn’t be a problem if—

“Go on.” Daryl gave you a shove you would almost define as gentle. It was the first time he had spoken to you since the CDC. You wanted to retort with something snarky, but what would that do other than piss him off more than he already was. “Grab anythin’ ya think could be useful.”

“Okay.” You kept your tone soft, picking up your pace to catch up to him when he brushed past. “Can we talk?” You really did want to smooth things over. You told yourself that the connection with Daryl was solely physical, but now you’d be raising a child together in an apocalypse. That would definitely be easier if you could communicate on some level at least. 

He never missed a step when he glanced at you while maneuvering between the automobiles. He’d peek in the windows of some but continued further out, probably to keep everyone else closer to your own cars. 

“Nah.” He finally glowered, walking backwards away from you a few steps before turning around and disappearing behind a cargo van. 

Sighing heavily, you took stock of your surroundings. There was no point in following after him. You didn’t have the energy anyway. The nausea was worsening and there was little to no water left in the RV. You allowed for a disgruntled breath, pressed a palm to your belly, and opened the driver door of the nearest car. The sooner everyone got what they needed, the better. 

The smell of the decaying corpse was horrific and forced you to pull things out with one hand while the other pressed over your mouth and nose. Luckily there wasn’t much more than a suitcase that held some men’s clothing. You weren’t sure what the men could use so you left what was there, with the exception of one shirt. Strategically ripping, you fashioned a cover to tie around your face. You’d work faster with both hands. 

After several minutes, you had found a damn treasure trove, including a beautiful knife in a holster that you had taken the liberty of securing around your thigh. It wasn’t a firearm but it was better than nothing. 

You were climbing backwards out of the backseat of a little hatchback when you took a break to steady yourself. You were drenched in sweat and felt a little dizzy. Maybe it was time to gather your findings and go back to the others for a break. You had gone pretty far ahead. 

The silence on the roadway was unnerving. You’d give almost anything for bumper to bumper traffic with an orchestra of angry shouts and sounding horns; for everything to go back like it was. You’d be in the woods at that time of day, tracking rabbits or squirrels. It didn’t take much to feed just you and your father. You didn’t have a smokehouse, so smaller game was ideal. You could still see his proud beam when you’d walk through the door. 

Those days were gone now. 

Back at your pile of finds, it occurred to you that you couldn’t carry it all back alone. Loath as you were to admit it, Daryl had been the closest. You pulled down your makeshift mask with a groan, but there was no other option unless you wanted to walk all the way back to the RV just to bring back help. They would likely demand you stayed put, but you didn’t want them to see you as incapable. Daryl was already annoyed with you, so requesting his assistance was your best bet. 

Your steps were dragging by the time you made it to the cargo van where he had so casually rebuffed your request. Barely around the rear bumper, your stomach decided to rebel. You lurched forward with a repulsive retching sound, stomach muscles cramping from the force of the heaves. Your stomach was empty. Rancid acid and bile burned your throat, the intensity of your gagging ensuring you could be heard all the way at the RV. 

Your stomach still contracted uncomfortably, excess saliva gathering in your mouth. You had just managed to wipe away any remnants on the sleeve of your flannel when a hand clamped down around your jaw. Fight or flight activated, you scrambled for the knife at your thigh, managing a single swipe before a hand caught your wrist. 

“Quiet, goddamnit!” Daryl hissed faintly against your ear. He was pulling you toward the back of the van and hastily shoving you inside before climbing in himself. You loured at him and sheathed your weapon while he scrupulously pulled the doors closed. 

“What—” His hand bore down over your mouth a second time, a finger raised to his lips. You only managed an indignant huff before something struck the side of the van with a thud. Vibrant orbs widened with realization that he had just saved your ass from what sounded like a sizable number of walkers. 

Daryl haltingly lowered his hand as if you’d yell at him despite the threat lurking just outside. The man was sweaty and panting, as if he’d been running. Giving him  once over you noticed the carmine liquid slowly saturating his shirt just above his hip. 

Your movements were slow and deliberate to ensure silence. He didn’t seem to notice you until you were almost next to him, resulting in him reeling back with a vexed expression. 

“You’re hurt.” You mouthed, reaching behind your head to untie the ripped section of fabric you had used as a mask. When you extended it toward the wound, he swatted at your hand. You couldn’t risk speaking so the two of you engaged in an intense staring contest. The hunter finally relented with a shake of his head, deeming alertness toward the flock of undead to be priority. You smirked and pressed the wadded strip against the injury. 

He let out a grunt but stayed still, eyes remaining on the doors. It didn’t take long for the bleeding to let up, giving you a chance to peel back one side of the slice in his shirt. The wound was superficial, wouldn’t need stitches, but it was abundantly clear that you had nicked him when he grabbed you. You felt your stomach drop. Or maybe that was just the nausea. 

“Think they moved on.” Daryl quietly informed you. Oblivious to your revelation, he opened one door, barely wide enough to see outside. “We can prolly head back to the—what?” He stopped short, your apologetic expression giving him pause. 

“I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t mean to—”

The hunter rolled his eyes. “S’fine. Won’t kill me.”

While he was quick to dismiss the event, you still felt terrible. It could have been so much worse. The whole thing made your desire to talk things out with him that much more crucial. “Daryl, can you just listen to me for a second?”

There was the briefest of moments when you thought he was going to acquiesce. There was something more than anger in the way he looked at you. Then he was shaking his head. “We gotta get back. Check in with ev’ryone.” You grabbed his arm with both hands when he shifted to climb out. “M’serious. I ain’t doin’ this.”

“I get that you’re angry—with me.” You swallowed hard against the strange taste in your mouth, ignoring the protests of your inexorable stomach. “You have every right to be.” Daryl growled and snatched his arm away. He climbed out and stood just outside the door, clearly not confident enough with the degree of safety to leave you behind. 

“Drop it, Y/N.” He warned. 

You had climbed out and blocked his path, hands hovering in front of his chest. “The least you can let me do is—” It happened just as suddenly as before. You had no time to react. You could only clutch your abdomen and pitch forward, vomiting up what little bile that had accumulated since the last episode. All over his left boot. “—apologize.” 

If it had been any other situation, the deadpan examination Daryl was currently giving his footwear would have been arguably hilarious. 

“I’m, uh, sorry about that too.”

His eyes moved up to glare at you from beneath his lashes. You didn’t think a mess on his boot would be enough to really set off a man who spent the majority of his time identifying—and very often stepping in—animal waste. This was just the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. He took a step toward you. Though you didn’t think he’d hurt you, even for reasons beyond the baby, you couldn’t say you knew him well enough to bank on that theory. Therefore, you took a step back. 

“Listen, woman, just ‘cause ya got my kid inside ya don’t mean I hafta—” He cut off suddenly, angling his head in a way that was familiar to you. You did the same thing while hunting; listening for sounds to indicate an animal was nearby. 

“What is it?” 

He shushed you harshly. When you focused on the sounds around you rather than the whirlwind of thoughts in your own head, you could hear it too. 

Your blood ran cold with dread. 

“Sophia! Lori, there’s two walkers after my baby!”

[ashtheketchum]

Hey, no pressure but when can we expect the next chapter of A New Family? I really love the concept of Daryl x Single Mom Reader!

A/N: As stupid as it sounds, questions and messages like these always make me happy. I never expected so many people to like this story! I always try to publish one chapter per week by the way ;D (Picture from Pinterest!)

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4

Taglist: @lowkeyhottho

Warnings: Blood, Injuries, Typical TWD Content

Masterlist!

____________________________________________

PoV (Y/N):

After the walkers were taken care of, we decided to go to the CDC. At first Shane was against it, as were some others, but Jim then convinced them. Not because he spoke well to them, but because he was bitten. When we found this out, we headed to the CDC. However, not everyone wanted to go there. Morales and his family wanted to go their own way and we accepted it. Rick gave Moales another gun and some ammunition while the others separated from his family.

(D/N) and I kept our distance, we didn't have any real contact with Morales and his family, so we didn't say goodbye. "Okay, we're leaving!" And with those words we set off to the CDC.

Rick, Carol, Lori, Sophia and Carl rode together, Dale, Jim, Tdog, Glenn, Andrea and Jacqui rode in the RV. I actually wanted (D/N) to go with one of them, but there was no more space. We sat with Daryl in his car. It had a huge loading area on which he had placed his brother's motorcycle. We had put our bags next to it because they would have taken up too much space at the front. While Daryl drove, I sat between him and (D/N), who was sleeping. She rested her head on my arm and I stroked her hand gently.

There was silence between Daryl and me. I didn't know what it was like between us now. He insulted me, then apparently wanted to spend time with (D/N). Then he snapped at me and then saved my and (D/N)'s life. It was confusing. I briefly thought about how (D/N) sees Daryl and I had to smile slightly. I sighed briefly in amusement, which Daryl probably noticed. ,, Wha´? Why´r ya laughing?" He asked, not annoyed, but more curious. "I didn't laugh…" I then said quietly and then turned my head away.

Daryl gave a brief snort of amusement. "F´course not…" Strangely, I couldn't hear any annoyed or offended tone in his voice. Maybe he was a little calmer now and I could tell him. It wouldn't really change anything anyway. “(D/N)… said that she sees you as a new father…” I then murmured quietly. A sad smile crept onto my lips and I looked down at her. She was breathing very calmly and had now laid her head on my lap. Daryl remained silent, although I could feel him tense briefly. "Wha´? Why tha´?" If I only knew that, Dixon.

Shrugging my shoulders, I looked out the window again. The streets were quiet and we didn't see a single walker. You might think that there wouldn't be any more, but this picture is deceptive. "I don't know…" I then sighed quietly.

Before Daryl could ask anything else, we suddenly saw the RV and Rick's car stop. Daryl stopped too and Rick motioned for us to come out. Just as I was about to unbuckle myself, Daryl moved his hand in front of my face. "Stay here, I'll go…" He just murmured quietly and he walked out. I stayed quiet for a moment, actually I didn't even have to listen to him, but if Daryl gave me the order not to do anything (which had never happened before), then there was probably a reason for it. So I stayed seated and watched the other group members talk.

Lori and Andrea looked at me briefly before tilting their heads towards me and speaking. For a while, I felt very uncomfortable, what were they talking about me? Did you want to get rid of us? Daryl spoke briefly before moving back to us. He opened his door and slammed it again. “Everything okay…?” Daryl remained silent for a moment. "Yeh… Jim wan´s ´ta stay here and be dropped off… we should say bye…" Daryl then said.

His answer chastised me a bit. Jim had lasted a really long time, but I expected him to give up now. He probably suffered terribly. "What did Lori and Andrea say?" This question slipped out of my mind. I didn't really want to ask, but somehow I had a right to know if it was about me. "They asked if ya should also say bye ta´ Jim… Andrea sai´ tha´ ya and (D/N) should do tha´…" Daryl explained briefly. "I said that ya should decide for yarself."

I was grateful and pissed. Why did Andrea take the right to decide over me and my daughter. However, I really wanted to say goodbye, out of respect. "It's okay… but thanks, Daryl…" I murmured quietly. I gently lifted (D/N)'s head to get out. I didn't want her to have to say goodbye, she wasn't ready for that. Daryl got out from his side so I could climb after him.

Rick and Shane sat Jim by a tree and we said goodbye. It took a lot of people away, Jacqui even gave him a kiss before she walked away. I then knelt down next to Jim and I nodded at him gratefully. "I hope you won't be in pain anymore…" "I won't… and take good care of your daughter…" He coughed quietly. I smiled lovingly at him before standing up and distancing myself again. After everyone said goodbye, we continued driving until we hit a traffic jam. (D/N) was awake again by now and I explained the situation to her with Jim before we all got out and listened to Rick.

(D/N) was a little sad, but she didn't cry because of the news with Jim. I didn't know if she was angry that she couldn't say goodbye or disappointed. But it didn't feel right for me to let her do something like that.

Since there were a lot of cars here, we had to somehow find resources to help us. Food, medicine, clothes, water and more. Just anything you could find. So we split up a bit and started looking. (D/N) and I went with Tdog. How the others divided up was different. "Maybe we can find new clothes or even medicine." (D/N) said, looking around too. "Let's hope so, little one." Tdog agreed with her. Tdog and I searched in the cars while (D/N) stayed outside and instead looked under them or looked around.

I found some clothes and a bottle of water. Smiling, I got out of the car again and I showed this to (D/N). She smiled brightly and reached for the fabric I had pulled out. It was a t-shirt, her size and she seemed to like it. "Can I keep this?" I acknowledged her question with a nod. “Walker!” Tdog suddenly said. Immediately we saw the huge herd coming towards us from the distance and we ran between the cars to the others.

“Mom!” (D/N) suddenly shouted. I immediately turned around and I saw (D/N) lying on the ground, blood flowing out of her leg. She had cut off a part of the rust. I immediately ran to her and I picked her up. My clothes soaked up her blood before it continued to drip to the floor. Breathing heavily, I kept running before Lori grabbed me and told me to hide under a car.

“Come on, get under the car, honey!” I said to (D/N), who slowly went under the car. I climbed after her and looked at her wound under the car. It was a deep cut, but it wasn't big. I looked deep into her eyes before tearing off some fabric from my top and wrapping it around the wound. In the background I could already hear the walkers running past us and (D/N) pressed her hands to her mouth to keep quiet. We were now trapped under the cars and (D/N) was bleeding non-stop.

Next Chapter ->

[hiro--aoki]

TWD X TUMBLR Chapter Two: Dinner Bell

TW: Rascism, use of the n-word (censored 😰i was actually scared to write this part ngl), the usual twd stuff, you know the drill

A/n: Chat, I'm slowly giving birth to these chapters

Previous Chapter // Next Chapter

Rick, Glenn and Artemis quietly walk across a path, connecting the building they’re on, to the next building over.

“You the ones who barricaded the alley?” Rick asks as they jump down a small ledge.

“Somebody did… I guess when the city got overrun.” Glenn replies.

“Whoever did it was thinking not many geeks would get through.” Artemis adds.

They start to run towards the entrance of the building’s roof.

“Back at the tank, why’d you stick your neck out for me?” Rick asks.

Glenn pulls open a door on the ground, as Artemis answers, “I call it foolish naïve hope.”

“That if we’re ever that far up shit creek,” Glenn says, as he tosses his bag down the hole, somebody might do the same for us.”

He starts to climb down the ladder. Again, followed by Rick and Artemis.

“Guess I’m an even bigger dumbass than you,” Glenn adds.

Rick pulls the door back down after they after they’re all in the dark tunnel. They reach the bottom of the ladder and Glenn picks up his back, before walking into a hallway. The groups movements are quick and urgent as they make their way through the abandoned building. The room they’re in is a mess, the ceiling tiles are partially falling, and the contents of the area are scattered all over the room. They make their way through a heavy door, which leads to an open staircase. They all go down the stairs, the only sounds are their heavy breathing and their footsteps.

Glenn pulls out a radio, “We’re back. Got a guest. Plus, four geeks in the alley.”

They reach the last few steps and see two walkers turn to them, and slowly stumble towards them. They don’t have anything to defend themselves. Rick’s gun is empty, Glenn doesn’t have any weapons, and Artemis wouldn’t be able to get close enough to the two to use her knife without being bitten or scratched.

A door bursts open and two people with bats and some form of body protection run out. They hit the walkers over the head and keep doing so until they’re sure they won’t get back up.

“Let’s go!” Glenn and Artemis yell to their saviours as they run towards the open door.

They hit them a few more times.

“Morales! Let’s go!” One of them, T-Dog, yells.

They both run towards the door, following the trio, and close the door behind them, keeping two other walkers that were in the alley, out.

Suddenly, a blonde lady pushes Rick against a bench, putting a gun to his forehead, “Son of a bitch. We ought to kill you.”

“Just chill out, Andrea. Back off.” One of the men in body protection, Morales, says.

“Come on, ease up.” A different woman, Jacqui, adds.

“Ease up? You gotta be kidding me, right? We’re dead because of this stupid asshole.” Andrea hisses.

Morales walks up beside her, “Andrea, I said back the hell off.”

Everyone watches in suspense, to see if Andrea will listen. She’s known for being stubborn. She doesn’t let up.

“Well, pull the trigger.” Morales challenges as he pulls of the makeshift amour.

Andrea is visibly holding back tears from the stress of the situation of being trapped in a building surrounded by corpses that would tear you apart without a second thought.

She lowers her gun, she fights back tears, as she slowly backs away from Rick, “We’re dead. All of us. Because of you.”

“…I don’t understand.” Rick says, looking around the group.

Morales puts a hand on Rick’s shoulder and starts to lead him and the rest of the group, to a different room, “Look, we came into the city to scavenge supplies. You know what the key to scavenging is? Surviving! You know the key to surviving? Sneaking in and out, tiptoeing. Not shooting up the streets like it’s the OK. Corral.”

They all walk down the dark corridors; Morales pushes Rick along in front of them. They walk into a clothes shop, where the only light source is the glass doors which are being blocked by what seems to be hundreds of walkers.

“Every geek for miles around heard you popping off rounds.” T-Dog adds, gesturing to the horde trying to get inside.

“You just rang the dinner bell.” Artemis summarises.

“Get the picture now?” Morales asks sarcastically.

The glass of the doors, the only barrier between the group and the hungry creatures other than another set of glass doors, is starting to crack.

“Oh god.” Andrea mutters, as they all back away from the doors.

“What the hell were you doing out there anyway?” Andrea questions Rick.

“Trying to flag the helicopter.” Rick answers.

“Helicopter? Man, that’s crap. There ain’t no damn helicopter.” T-Dog says.

“You were chasing a hallucination, imagining things. It happens.” Jacqui tries to justify Rick ‘insaneness’.

“I saw it.” Rick argues, firmly and confidently.

The others all look at each other, unconvinced.

Morales breaks the silence, “Hey, T-Dog, try that CB. Can you contact the others?”

“Others?” Rick asks, “The refugee centre?”

“Yeah, the refugee centre. They’ve got biscuits waiting at the oven for us.” Jacqui replies.

“Got no signal. Maybe the roof.” T-Dog interrupts and he fiddles with the buttons on the radio.

Suddenly, there’s a gunshot from the roof.

“Oh no. Was that Dixon?” 

“What is that maniac doing?”

“C’mon let’s go.”

The group starts to move to a staircase.

______________

Merle raises his rifle again, looking through the scope, loads it again, and pulls the trigger. The sound echoes throughout the streets. He does this again, and again, and- Is interrupted by the group coming through a door

“Hey Dixon! You crazy?!” Morales yells as he runs over to Merle but makes sure to keep a safe distance from him.

Merle just laughs, “Ooh! You best be polite to a man with a gun. Huh?”

Merle jumps down from the ledge he was perched on. Letting out a grunt as he lands.

“Only common sense.” Merle laughs.

“Man, you’re wasting bullets we ain’t even got, man!” T-Dog yells as he rushes towards Merle, “And you’re bringing even more of them down on our ass! Man, just chill.”

“Hey, bad enough I’ve got this taco-bender on my ass all day.” Merle gestures to Morales, “Now I’m gonna take orders from you? I don’t think so, bro. That’ll be the day.”

“That’ll be the day? You got something you wanna tell me?” T-Dog asks, growing more angry but the second.

“Hey, T-Dog man, just leave it.” Morales says, also growing irritated.

“No-“

“All right? It ain’t worth it. Now Merle, just relax, okay?” Morales tries to calm the situation, “We’ve got enough trouble.”

“You want to know the day?” Merle ignores Morales and continues to shit stir T-Dog.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll tell you the day, Mr. “Yo.” It’s the day I take orders from a n-----.”

“Mother-“T-Dog goes to punch Merle.

Merle stops him and hits him square in the face with the butt of his rifle. T-Dog stumbles back and falls. The rest of the group rushes forward to help him.

“Hey, come on, Merle. That’s enough.” Morales says as Merle keeps hitting T-Dog.

“Okay, come on. Come on!” Andrea shouts.

“Merle, stop this shit!” Artemis yells.

Rick tries to pull Merle away from T-Dog but gets punched in the face. He then goes after T-Dog again, kicking and punching him like crazy.

“Whoa, cut it out, man!” Morales raises his voice.

As T-Dog falls, his head gets slammed on a metal pipe.

“Stop it!”

“Dixon, come on!”

“Get off him!”

The group keeps trying to stop Merle with minimal violence but he’s relentless on his attack.

“Dixon you’re gonna hurt him!” Andrea yells, her voiced flooded with concern.

“Merle cut it out!”

But it’s Merle, like hell he’s gonna listen to them. He even hits Morales in his tantrum. Suddenly, he decides it’s a good idea to pull his gun on T-Dog.

“No, no, no, please. Please.” Andrea pleads merle to stop.

Thunder rumbles in the distance as the only sounds from the group is Merle panting and T-Dog grunting in pain.

Merle spits on T-Dog’s chest, “Yeah! All right! We’re gonna have ourselves a little powwow, huh?”

He slowly stands from T-Dog’s chest.

“Talk about who’s in charge.” He continues, “I vote me. Anybody else?”

Glenn, Jacqui and Andrea pull T-Dog away from Merle.

“Huh? Democracy time, ya’ll.” He’s crazed for power among the group, “Show of hands, huh?”

Merle raises his hand, with a snarky grin, “All in favour? Huh?”

Morales slowly raises his hand.

“Oh, come on.” Andrea says.

“Seriously, encouraging him?” Artemis asks.

“All in favour?” Merle asks again.

Slowly, the rest of the group raises their hands, Jacqui and Artemis flipping him off as they do.

“Yeah, that means I’m the boss, right?” He knows the answer, he just wants to hear them say it, “Yeah. Anybody else?”

“Yeah.” Rick says as he swings a plank of wood over Merle’s head.

Merle is knocked to the ground and Rick kneels on him, one knee on his head as he handcuffs his hands to a pipe. Rick then slightly lifts Merle by the collar of his shirt.

“Who the hell are you, man?!” Merle mutters.

“Officer Friendly.”

@kookiekult @smutinlove @far-cry-from-finality @zomb-1-egutzz

@shadowybasementmiracle @vaniniweenie @sleep-queen

@frankcastleautism @hisdahlia @carlslvr @zzombiegirl

@lunarnightt @carlmipololo @herrera2k @txrasbae

[biblio-smia]

the last thing i need — three

warnings: twd content warnings

pairings: glenn rhee x reader

[one.] [two.] [three.]

Glenn's absence weighed heavier on your shoulders than you'd anticipated. Occasionally, you'd look behind you and expect to find him there, eyes on you, only to find no one there. Every time you turned to look ended with a shake of your head and turning back to whatever was in front of you.

Perhaps the feeling was as outwardly obvious as it was strong, as Jacqui looked at you with pity in her warm brown eyes, inviting you to sit with the women.

They had taken a break from laundry to sit and chat, but you thought that picking up where they left off would keep your mind off of Glenn.

It didn't work very well.

You blamed one of Glenn's shirts that came up with stains that would never come out. Nevertheless, you tried, taking your time and being extra gentle with the piece of clothing. Even while he was away, Glenn got special treatment from you — and you hated it.

The mission the men departed on should've been calling your name. It did at first, at least for a little while, enticing you with an opportunity to escape the camp you found yourself on.

The desire to go vanished once Glenn revealed he would be going, too.

The brief conversation you had with Glenn weighed on your chest, a feeling too thick to swallow stuck in your throat.

You acted hastily then, overcome with an emotion you didn’t want to admit. Now it was just you and your thoughts, trying to come up with an alternate, much more reasonable explanation.

You told yourself you didn't try to join in on the mission because it'd be harder to separate from the group in the city filled with walkers. There was space to move here, space to slip off quietly if you were more careful than last time.

It wasn't because of the was your lips pulsed after meeting Glenn's cheek. It wasn't because of the way your heart pounded at the thought of him back in the city you barely escaped.

Solitude was familiar. Although it was never true, not with all the walkers you encountered, it was all you'd known for a while. You tried to keep up with it even now at this camp bustling with life, isolating yourself from the women just a few feet away — but the company was tempting.

And stubborn.

Andrea turned to wave you over, patting a spot near her. The rest of the women followed her lead with warm smiles that shone on the darkest parts of you, filling you with an unwilling joy.

You abandoned Glenn's shirt and accepted the invitation, although you were quiet for the most part — save for the little laughs the girls pulled out of you.

The five of you watched as the water glistened in the sunlight, exchanging stories and laughter as they confessed what they missed most about the old word.

"Speaking of things we miss... what's up with you and Glenn?" Andrea inquired with a grin and a bump to your shoulder. The rest of the women were silent but you could tell the question was on their mind, too — they just weren't as straightforward or bold to ask it.

"What?" You asked, feeling a little embarrassed at the question. There was really no reason to, but you couldn't help but feel like the tiptoeing around your own emotions was useless if suspicion of anything between you and Glenn was this high. "No, there's nothing up with us," you shook your head.

"Really? Cause I could've sworn you went into his tent the first night you got here—" Andrea spoke, earning a few gasps and small laughs from the other women.

Oh. She meant that.

Now you were really embarrassed.

You didn't have time to form an answer as a man approached — Carol's husband. His expression was humorless as he pressed for details of your conversation, pushing your group closer and closer to discomfort and defense — namely, Andrea.

You didn't blame her for it. You didn't blame her for calling out Ed's laziness and his abuse towards Carol, the news making your eyes widen and your body move in front of Carol defensively. Your hands weren't enough to stop Ed in the commotion, not as you saw how tightly he was gripping on to Carol.

No, Ed didn't stop until he was beat to a pulp by Shane.

You could hear your heart pound and feel the anxious sweat on your palms as you and the rest of the women did your best to comfort Carol, trying to focus on helping her rather than the violence you'd just witnessed.

Ed deserved it, undoubtedly, but it did not make you any less weary of Shane. Something about the man was off-putting. Something about him made you uneasy but you couldn't figure out what. No one else seemed to pick up on anything strange, so you kept quiet and kept your distance.

But one look at Ed's face told you that maybe you'd have to look out for the living more than the dead.

-

A stupid part of you waited anxiously for Glenn's return, knowing his presence would ease you even if he was unaware of your caution. It was awful, this feeling — one you'd felt before, but never quite this intense. This feeling would make you stupid if you let it — part of the reason you'd wanted to abandon ship at first hint of it.

There was no time for things like romance anymore, no matter how badly you craved it. It was about survival now.

And yet, you couldn't help but remember how you felt when Glenn's hands were on you, his lips on your neck —

You shook your head. This was no time for that.

Night was beginning to creep up and Glenn still had not returned. That feeling in your throat almost made it impossible to breathe.

The night was eerie despite the soft chatter of voices and crickets, the light of a fire illuminating faces with golden warmth. You took a plate of food and sat off by yourself, taking the opportunity to gather your thoughts. All the plans you'd previously had were in shambles. No next move you thought of felt right. Your fingers tapped on your knee nervously, teeth chewing up your lip in thought.

Maybe, if you hadn’t been alone for so long, you wouldn’t have picked up on the low groans from behind you.

You stood and pulled your knife in one swift motion, plunging the blade into the walker’s head, feeling the blood splatter on you. Another walker replaced the fallen one immediately, a small hoard in pursuit, pushing you towards the others.

The others.

“Walkers!” You called, distancing yourself from the pack just enough to turn around.

But you and your familiarity with being alone were not used to fighting with others. It had been too long since you have had to fight for anyone. Your warning was too late and there was nothing you could do but watch as a walker bit Amy.

Self-preservation is what you know, your attention snapping back to the problem ahead of you just in time. You know these movements better than anything - push them back, stab the knife into their heads, just enough to hit the brain - but the walkers don't stop coming.

All you are aware of are the screams behind you, begging for your attention as your heart lurches with the urge to help families trying to find each other in the chaos that has suddenly taken over camp.

You try to focus, try to convince yourself that helping yourself is helping them, that each walker down is one less walker able to bite and infect.

Gunshots ring out from behind you, next to you, all around you as walkers take over.

“Get to the R.V! Go!” Someone shouts over the sound of the bullets.

The crowd was at least thinning out now. Your arm was tiring from the repetitive movements, but you didn’t dare stop.

Not until there was only one walker left in front of you.

Even in the dim light of the camp, you can recognize her. Your heart feels heavy in your chest and guilt clogs your throat.

What was left of your sister dragged her body towards you, mouth ready to bite.

-

Your arm fell limp by your side. Your breath caught in your throat. A bullet hit your sister (no, not your sister) and someone screamed. Maybe it was you.

You dropped with her, stationed on your knees as you watched your sister reach for you.

Most of her was missing and the last time you saw her flashed in your mind. She’d yelled at you not to look back at her but you couldn’t help it; Now you were left with the image of her caught in the mouths of walkers, all desperate for a bite.

She’d sacrificed herself for you to continue on. To live.

And here she was now, because you couldn’t bring yourself to shoot her back then.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

Your face was wet. Was it blood, sweat, or tears?

-

Glenn was sure he’d hit a walker with his bullet, but your scream made him doubt himself as he ran. Rick, T-Dog, and Daryl cleared the rest of the hoard, but Glenn’s only worry now was you.

His footsteps slowed as he spotted you, cradling a body that hadn’t been alive in a while. Though the body had stopped moving now - Glenn noticed the knife you plunged into the back of its head.

Glenn called your name softly, kneeling on the ground to join you. His hand came to your shoulder and he could see the tears drip off your face and make silent splatters on the zombie in your arms.

“We can bury her,” Glenn said quietly. “We do that for the ones we love.”

You nodded and your face found Glenn’s chest, your arms letting go of your sister, cold and dead, and clinging on to the warm body next to you. Alive.

You couldn’t be more grateful.

-

The aftermath was chaos. The bodies, littered everywhere, were unnerving. The children cried and Andrea sat over her sister’s corpse all night.

You knew exactly how she felt. You made sure she knew it, too. She didn’t speak a word as you cleaned as much blood from Amy’s body as you could. Her gaze never left her sister as you cleaned her own hands.

“There,” you said. You looked back at the rest of the group watching you, some desperate to put a bullet in Amy’s brain. “You take all the time you need. Don’t let them take that from you.”

You expected the lack of response as you stood, unwavering as you stared Daryl down, watching as he shook his head and went off to keep dragging the bodies.

-

You didn’t speak when you heard footsteps follow you to the edge of the woods. You knew who it was, and what he was doing. You wished you could hate him for it.

“Let me help,” Glenn offered from behind you as you looked at your sister’s body. It laid exactly as you’d left it before, but the daylight revealed the horrific state she died in.

You accepted Glenn’s help wordlessly, taking her shoulders while he grabbed her feet.

“Had to fight Dixon to bury our people. I mean, he just wanted to burn them!” Glenn shook his head, eyes glancing up to yours.

He was too good. That was it. That was what you hated so much.

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“No, no, I did. For her. For Amy, too. And everyone else back there. We still have to have some humanity, right? Or else we’re just surviving, not... not living.”

Glenn’s words rang in your mind as the two of you carried the body through the thick Georgia heat, sweat dripping down every part of you.

Living. Not just surviving.

Your sister’s last words. Her last wish. For you to live.

You looked back up at Glenn as the two of you dropped your sister in the “Bury” pile, watching as he adjusted his cap and wiped some sweat off his brow.

Live. Not just survive.

Maybe Glenn could help you figure out what that meant.

-

Soft chatter surrounded you as you sat off to the side, knees pulled up to your chest. You sat away from the group, as you always did, keeping an eye on the people and another on the woods.

There was talk of going to the CDC. You weren't sure how well that was going to work out if the CDC looked like the rest of the world.

But there was something in the group as they spoke to each other, even after everything that had happened today. There was hope, small sparks of it glowing like the embers of a fire.

Maybe you'd let yourself have some of it, too.

"Hey," a voice spoke, pulling up a chair next to you.

"Hey." You glanced up at Glenn, watching him run a hand through his hair, his cap in his hand.

The sun glistened off his skin, making his hair shine as he turned his head to look at you. There was a trace of a smile but an even bigger hint of a question on his lips.

You knew what the question would be. But you still weren't quite sure of your answer.

"What happened in Atlanta?" You ask, hoping to buy yourself time and realizing that everything that had happened after Glenn's returned had prevented you from asking about it sooner.

"Atlanta." Glenn repeats, the place seeming so foreign to him now. "Well, we got the guns." He laughs, sounding too forced, eyes wandering over the faces that remain. You're quiet, feeling the guilt you share heavy in the air.

"But we ran into some guys."

Your eyebrows raise at this - you don't know strangers nowadays to be particularly friendly. Glenn was rare.

"And you just handed over guns?" You didn't mean to sound accusing, but you were trying to paint out what had happened.

"Well... kind of? I mean, we worked out a deal."

"What deal?"

Glenn hesitates, trying to work the story without having to mention the more embarrassing details.

"They were taking care of a whole bunch of elderly people. They were just... abandoned."

You seem to relax at this, at least slightly. "They could've just shot you and taken everything." You're only half-serious but Glenn doesn't quite catch that.

"They really wanted to. Especially Daryl, he had-"

Glenn cuts himself off but he's already piqued your curiosity as you lean forward in your seat, urging Glenn to continue.

"Well, it was a little bit of a situation," Glenn starts exasperatedly. "They had taken one of us, we took one of theirs... It just- It happened really fast!"

"They kidnapped you?"

How bad of a liar is he? Glenn stutters but his lack of a coherent response is enough to fill in the blanks for you.

Your chest hurts strangely, your fingers messing nervously with the hard surface of your nails. You've begun to avoid looking at Glenn just as he glances at you, a heavy silence that a part of you is desperate to fill, nervous it will make Glenn stand and place his chair elsewhere.

You had been saved from answering questions from others about Glenn earlier but nothing was able to halt the constant thoughts you had about him. You're not sure how much longer you can keep running from it - you're not sure how much good it'll do.

"So, the CDC?" You asked, hoping Glenn's answer would help guide you towards one of your own.

"Rick thinks it's our best shot."

"And you trust him?" There was no mockery or accusation in your voice — only genuine curiosity.

Glenn looked down at his cap, nodding a little. "Yeah. Yeah, I think I do."

"You just met him," you noted quietly, knowing very well Glenn had met both you and Rick on the same day.

"You don't need to know someone for years to know you can trust them."

You looked up to see Glenn staring at you. Clearly, he wasn't just talking about Rick.

"That type of thinking could get you killed," you say quietly.

"Or it could save my life."

Live.

Your knee bounced anxiously as you thought about it. About what going with these people would mean.

It'd mean companions, for starters. No more nights fighting to stay awake, watching your own back. It'd mean splitting supplies. It'd mean strength in numbers.

You looked at Glenn again.

It could lead to something else, too.

"I'll go with you. To the CDC," you start softly, watching from the corner of your eye as Glenn's head snapped toward you, clearly in disbelief. "It sounds promising."

You barely knew Rick. You barely knew any of these people. But Glenn trusted Rick and you trusted Glenn. That's the only thing you were sure of now.

Glenn looked at you with a boyish, handsome grin and the corners of your lips raised to mirror his.

Your hand reached for Glenn's, interlacing your fingers with his. Your hands found his over and over — throughout the night, in the morning, as you packed into Dale's R.V. and towards the CDC. As you left Jim behind. As you almost died outside of the fortified building. As you finally made it inside.

The building was large and seemed safe enough — there was no way Dr. Jenner could have made it this far if it wasn't. But it wasn't until a large table full of food and drinks was set, laughter chiming in your ears, did you finally begin to relax.

A smile spread on your own face as Carl tries wine for this first time, his face morphing into one of disgust as the rest of you laughed. This mood, light and playful, was one you haven't experienced in who knows how long. There's a thick feeling of appreciation in your throat, hot and heavy in your chest. You're almost emotional, thinking of every sacrifice it took for you to be here, today, laughing and talking over dinner again.

But Shane, always solemn, can't seem to stand the uncharacteristic liveliness that has found the group tonight.

"So, when are you going to tell us what the hell happened here, doc?" The laughter is killed instantly, an uncomfortable silence falling on the once chattering table.

'We're celebrating, Shane," Rick starts, the tension between the former best friends particularly prominent. "Don't need to do this now."

Eyes flicker between the two with an occasional flicker to the doctor in the room, but downward gazes and quiet sips of wine offered neutrality from most.

"Woah, wait a second. This is why we're here, right? This was your move... Supposed to find all the answers. Instead, we found one man. Why?"

"Well, when things got bad, a lot of people just left. Went off to be with their families. And when things got worse, when the military cordon got overrun, the rest bolted."

"Every last one?" Shane asks dryly, suspiciously.

"No, many couldn't face walking out the door. They... opted out. There was a rash of suicides." Most shuffle uncomfortably, looking at anywhere but at Jenner. "That was a bad time."

"You didn't leave," Andrea notes, one of the only ones still invested in learning about Jenner. "Why?"

"I just kept working. Hoping... to do some good."

It's a good answer for most, no matter the somber tone. It's enough for you; you just hope that Shane's poking and prodding won't push the man that has seen too much too far. The last thing you want is to be kicked out now.

"Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man." Shane avoids Glenn's stare and you cross your arms, decisively done for the night.

Jenner gives you a small tour of the facility, mainly of the rooms you'll be occupying. A piece of you wonders what else there is, but the majority of you aches for a peaceful night.

Jenner has disappeared into a different room and the group has stopped in the middle of the hallway.

"Hot water?" Glenn glances to the rest of the group before his gaze lands on you, standing behind him.

"That's what the man said," T-Dog grins.

Glenn's smile is contagious, creeping up slowly despite you missing what Jenner said. But if Glenn is excited about it, it's got to be worth it.

The hot water on your skin completely is.

You try to savor each drop of water, relishing in the steam curling off the water. You can't remember the last time you had the luxury of hot water but you resign, letting everything roll off of you along with the water.

You scrub at your skin, mindlessly and too roughly, thinking about everything that has happened in the last few days. Everything about the last few months.

Your sister was dead. The guilt in your throat wasn't any easier to swallow.

Something had happened between Rick and Glenn on their trip back to Atlanta. Glenn stuck out his neck for Rick on that very first day that your paths had all crossed, so Rick risked his own for Glenn. At least there was someone else in the group that would do that for him.

Atlanta. Nothing in that overriden city could've prepared you for the overwhelming company you now found yourself traveling with. There was no ounce of you that imagined you might find someone to love again.

You shut the water off once you're sure you've scrubbed every crevice of yourself, your skin rubbed raw in a few places.

The towels you've been given are rough, thin, and terrible shields against the cold air that blasts through the facility but you don't mind. Nothing matters other than the feeling of the fresh clothes Jenner has managed to scrounge up, missing all the dirt and blood that's stained your clothes for months.

A part of you, as you settle into the first empty room you see, wonders how long it'll be until the clothes you're wearing now will be bloodstained again.

You've taken to cleaning off your knife, in the spirit of the fresh scent of soap sticking to your skin and the pristine condition of the garments on your body. You're careful not to stain anything with the shades of red and brown of your knife, barely lifting your head when you hear someone enter the room you've claimed.

"Sorry, didn't think anyone was in here..."

Glenn trails off when he spots your smile, your hand waving him over to the spot next to you. He takes it, body tense as he tries to keep his eyes off of you.

Glenn thought you were perfect before, but without the layer of grime on you, all he wants to do is stare.

Glenn thinks he's being sneaky until your eyes meet his, Glenn's already flushed face reddening even more.

He's too terrified to make a move, still wondering where it is he stands with you. You're not lovers as far as he's aware, though it's a losing battle on his side. Glenn thinks he'd do anything to get inside your head and see for himself what it was you thought about him. He wanted you to like him, desperately, his body aching for contact with yours. He wanted to kiss you until he memorized you and every one of your smiles.

But he'd take whatever it is you wanted to give him. He'd hold your hand whenever you reached for it, on your own terms, right up until you pulled away.

The sudden arrival of man-eating freaks had forced Glenn, for the most part, to mature; to learn how to fight, to look out for others in ways his shitty job as a delivery boy had not yet taught him. From one day to the next, he had outgrown the red uniform that always seemed to smell of food no matter how many times it was washed. Though no one cared to ask about the person Glenn was Before, he liked to think he was the same Glenn who had, with his own will, made it through high school and to college, on his own.

But, in some ways, Glenn still felt immature. All that time he had spent working and studying had left him with little free time for personal indulgences. He had never prioritized romance and now that it was here, in front of him, he found himself on his ass more often than on his feet.

The door opens again and Glenn’s head whips towards it like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t, his flushed face not doing him any favors. But it’s just Shane, so Glenn’s shoulders relax, eyes glancing over the man and landing on the bottle of bourbon in his hand.

Shane spares a sideways glance, eyes stuck on you as he takes a swig from the nearly empty bottle. Glenn’s eyes follow Shane’s and eventually fall on you, too; notably, the knife in your lap, practically shining from how much you’d been wiping it.

"You're a real whiz with that knife.” Shane props himself against the doorframe, probably to keep from stumbling. There’s a sudden smile on his face, too wide to put you at ease. “Good thing I stopped ya from leaving that first night, huh?"

Shane grins through his words as he takes another swig, eyes still stuck on you as Glenn stands. He’s turned towards you, eyes searching for any indication that Shane is just drunk, or out of his mind; but you’re stuck, eyebrows drawn and lips set in a straight line as you stare at Shane right back.

Glenn steps into Shane’s line of sight, effectively breaking the wordless confrontation. Shane’s eyes move to him now, trying to slip past Shane wordlessly. Shane shifts, blocking Glenn’s way. But before he can speak, Glenn has shoved his way into the hallway.

"I'm just looking out for you, man!" Shane calls behind him before his lips find the top of the bottle again.

You’re in front of Shane before you can help it, eyes trying to follow Glenn. But just as he did before, Shane has turned toward you, his large build blocking any easy ways out.

"Why didn't you just kill me that night, then? I know you wanted to."

"That's not true.” There’s a grin on Shane’s face that tells you he’s lying.

"Yeah."

The look of amusement on Shane’s face drops. He has learned from last time and fights back when you try to push past him. One of his hands keeps you pinned to the doorframe, pressing painfully on your shoulder.

“You’re just another mouth to feed,” Shane drawls, his breath reeking of alcohol. “You don’t deserve a guy like Glenn.”

There was more to it, you were sure. Glenn had told you that Shane was their leader and wasn’t fond of newcomers. Especially when one wanted his wife and kid back.

You could tell Shane felt challenged by Rick despite their history. Maybe Shane thought of you as a wildcard, neither loyal to him nor Rick. But if you would stick with Glenn, who would clearly follow Rick anywhere, weren’t you a threat?

You pushed Shane’s arm forcefully, the alcohol in his bottle swishing as he stumbles.

“You should’ve killed me,” you say, smiling suddenly. “You’re not getting another chance.”

Glenn moves down the hallway briskly, his feet taking him further and further away from you. There’s that feeling in your chest again, the same one you felt with Glenn back at the camp you had abandoned. It was fear, but it wasn’t the familiar kind that you’d spent months fighting along with the walkers. This one was thicker, heavier, putting a pressure on your chest that made it difficult to breathe. Unfortunately, you had come to care about Glenn Rhee.

And as Glenn walks away, he feels as though he has, once again, found himself on his ass.

[optimist-pine]

Dermatillomania (Daryl Dixon x Reader)

Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of the fall of the Greene Farm in a way your therapist would not approve of.

Warnings: Typical TWD content! Dermatillomania (BFRB's, self-inflicted injury), mentions of death, etc.

Word Count: 719

Era: Follows directly after the season 2 finale

A/n: Just a personal vent... Dunno if anyone else relates.

It hadn't been easy to stop necessarily, but anything other than going cold turkey hadn't really been an option. When you absentmindedly find yourself starting to pick, a quick reminder that it could get you killed is all it takes to shut it down. Most of the time anyways... Tonight though? Oh, tonight you've fallen into old habits so fast and hard that you're stuck there in that state, in the worst session you've had since it all began.

You're tucked away in your own little corner of the ruins and firelight, shadowed enough that no one's really paying attention to what you're up to. At some point, your arms have come out of the sleeves of your coat and it's shrugged loosely around you, leaving skin exposed to the chilly air. You don't notice.

It's all catching up now, all replaying in your mind like the final straw has been plucked. That horrible night at the quarry, the panic when what had been a safe place was so quickly turned into a graveyard. Leaving Jim to die. The terror at the CDC of almost being murdered as a mercy. Leaving Jacqui to die. Sophia... Dale... The farm could've been a safe place, you'd truly believed it until they were somehow just - everywhere. Patricia, Jimmy, Shane... Leaving Andrea to die...

You can feel how it's all too much for your mind to handle, how it's trying to relieve the pressure in this way. It's no good, but your body doesn't know better and you don't know how to make it stop. You can't make any of it stop. Your fingernails desperately search raw skin for any bump, or blemish, or imperfection. They're everywhere. Maybe you'd feel ashamed if bigger and uglier emotions weren't cramming it out of the way.

The cold air cools drops of hot blood on your skin, you can feel it, and yet you feel separate from it simultaneously. Like the same way you breathe without thinking about the breathing part. The fire crackles low and leaves rustle out in the trees as the others hunker down. Nobody's really sleeping though. Not tonight.

Daryl's keeping watch on the perimeter when his eyes settle on you. Your fingers pause in their assault; you can't continue with an audience. Please just look away so I can keep going, some darkness in your mind pleads. But no, you scramble to pull the coat over yourself to conceal the evidence.

"What's this?" He asks, his voice low enough that the others won't really notice.

"Nothing. I'm fine." You can't meet his eyes, shame has finally pushed its way to the forefront now.

You don't try to stop him as he slides the coat off your shoulder, revealing your handiwork. Even in the darkness, you're sure the ugly redness has to be so obvious. You're not only weak, you're weak and stupid.

He pulls your backpack over and digs through it. "Your first aid kit in here?"

You nod once, but that only initiates the tears. What feeling are they from? Anger? Guilt? Fear? This was always the worst part, hating what you've done and wishing for nothing more than to go back and undo it. After everything that had happened... pathetic.

Daryl finds the antibacterial spray and gets to work. His care and surprising tenderness only make you feel that much worse. You were so incapable of handling yourself that you've got a full-grown man treating you like... like the broken thing that you are.

After that he takes a couple of bandages and wraps them around your upper arms, fingers steady and slow. "Leave 'em alone an' let 'em heal. You're tougher than that." He packs up the supplies, helps you fit your arms back into the sleeves, then waits. You're not sure what he expects from you, but then he mimes a zippering motion. You comply and close up your coat. With a single nod, he turns and returns to his watch of the dark surrounding forest.

Maybe you're just thoroughly messed up, but you trade the repeating images in your mind for his words. The past. You have to leave it alone. You have to let it heal. You're here, now, in the present. Alive. You would be tough enough to stay that way. You would.

[desiderio-dixon]

Darkest Before the Dawn

Chapter 3 : Hand Me Downs

Pairing : Daryl Dixon x f!reader (endgame), (unrequited) Glenn Rhee x f!reader

Series summary : When Glenn Rhee comes into your life, you become convinced he's a guardian angel sent by your late best friend. You think he's your soulmate. But then he falls for the farmer's daughter, and you find that your own angel may be a little more blatant than expected; wings and all.

Chapter summary : Glenn returns from Atlanta, Daryl returns from hunting, and all of you leave on a rescue mission for Merle.

Chapter warnings : language, violence, gore, general twd themes

Word count : 3.8k

A/N : This one wasn't proof-read so if anyone noticed any mistakes please lmk! next update may be a little slower because closing in on the process of adopting a puppy!

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

Emerging from your tent, you head for Dale immediately. The noise is only growing closer and louder, and everyone is grouped around Dale. The old man looks through his binoculars, eyebrows furrowed. "Well, I'll be damned." Dale mutters.

"What is it?" Amy pushes impatiently.

"A stolen car is my guess."

The bright red sports car pulls into the quarry, and your heart leaps in your chest when you spy the driver. While everyone around panics about the noise, or their still-missing friends, your relief outweighs anything else. You leap onto Glenn, hugging him tight while he attempts to calm Amy. Paying it no mind, you only focus on the way his arms circle around your back to return the hug. It only lasts a couple seconds before he's stepping back to pop the hood for Shane. It's enough, though.

"Why isn't she with you? Where is she? She's okay?" Amy sputters, wide eyed and frantic.

"Yes! Yeah, fine. Everybody is. Well, Merle not so much." Typically you wouldn't care that anything had happened to Merle. You'd even go as far to say, you'd be downright relieved. You wouldn't wish death on anyone, but maybe you'd wish that Merle would somehow be teleported a good 200 miles away from you. But, that relief was only there for a split second. Instead, you felt a deep sense of worry for Daryl.

You didn't know him much at all, hell, he's spoken no more than five sentences to you the entire time you'd known him. None of those sentences were ever delivered in a particularly friendly manner, but just this morning he had helped you. You knew he felt like an outsider, and it seemed the only person in the group he liked was his brother.

Not only were you worried he'd fall into some form of depression if Merle was dead, but you were also worried he'd leave. Daryl provided so much to your group, and whether they realized it or not, everyone owed a lot to him.

You break free of your thoughts just in time to hear Dale scolding Glenn. "It wouldn't hurt you to think things through a little more carefully next time, would it?"

You know Glenn looks up to Dale, can see his worry of disappointing him. "Sorry," Glenn says, staring at his feet. Then, he looks up with a grin. "Got a cool car." That makes you let out a huff of laughter. It is a pretty cool car.

Your attention is stolen away by the sound of tires crunching over gravel, the van pulling in behind the red dodge charger. Andrea is the first to hop out, running to Amy. Morales, T-dog, and Jacqui all spill out after her. Morales greets his wife and children before coming over to give Dale a hug. "I thought we'd lost you folks for sure." Dale laughs.

"How'd y'all get out of there, anyway?" Shane asks, hands on his hips. The classic authoritarian stance he always seems to don.

From beside you, Glenn speaks up. "New guy." He glances to the van. "He got us out." New guy? It's been a while since your group has welcomed a new addition.

Nothing could prepare you for the reaction to the man who steps out of the van. Lori and Shane frozen, absolutely shellshocked. Carl, running and screaming for his father.

Lori recovers after a moment, falling into her husband's awaiting arms. Shane stays where he is, no hint of a smile on his face. You catch him fake one when Rick looks his way. It's not hard to guess what's happening. "Trouble in apocalyptic paradise for Shane and Lori." You whisper to Glenn, who only looks down at his shoes and shakes his head in sardonic amusement.

You get along well enough with Lori, if nothing else but for the simple fact that you adore her son. She's never done anything to make you think less of her, and you really don't blame her for her obvious affair with Shane. She'd told the story to you once or twice. Husband gets shot on the job, comatose, shit hits the fan, husband's best friend takes care of her and her son. And of course, she'd told you the part where Shane had listened for a heartbeat. There was none. Or so it was said.

Who can blame a grieving widow, lost in this shit-storm of a world for seeking comfort in a fling with the man she believes is her savior?

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

You sit down by the unlit firepit with T-dog and Glenn. T-dog gnaws on a piece of jerky, eyes downcast. "Daryl's not gonna be happy," You start. No one has filled you in exactly on what happened, just that Merle was left chained on the roof. Alive but trapped. "But I'm sure he'll understand to some degree. He's gotta be more tired of his brother than any of us." You joke. T-dog just shakes his head, obviously guilty.

"He was out of control. Rick did the right thing." Glenn tells you. You hum in response, gaze wandering to where Rick wanders around camp, acquainting himself with all it's residents. The deputy must feel your eyes on him, because when he's done shaking Ed's hand, he heads for you. He's all confident strides, a sureness you haven't seen in anyone since the end of the world. You guess it's the effect of finding your wife and child in such unlikely circumstances.

He stops in front of you, hand extended and a smile more full of happiness than you've seen in two months. "Rick Grimes." He introduces.

You return his smile, clasping his hand. "Trust me, I already knew your name. Carl's told me all about how cool his daddy is." He laughs, looking down in a sort of bashful manner. You tell him your name, and he repeats it, nodding to himself.

"Yeah," He drawls. "Turns out I already knew yours, too. Glenn told me you know the city like the back of your hand." You nod. You'd lived in Atlanta before the turn, and you'd only become even more informed on it given the various runs you'd been on.

"Oh yeah. Normally I would've been there, being the one to save Glenn's ass. Glad you were there to fill my shoes." You tease, nudging Glenn with your shoulder. He pushes you back gently, sputtering out defenses.

When you glance back to Rick, he's laughing too.

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

After the sun had gone to sleep, and the stars brought a bitter chill to the air, everyone gathered around the firepit. Rick has Lori and Carl tucked into his side as he recalls the chain of events leading him back to them. "Disoriented. I guess that comes closest. Disoriented. Fear, confusion; all of those things but, disoriented comes closest."

It must be strange to just wake up in a world like this. At least you had seen things progress. Heard the stories of cannibals on the radio, seen the news clips of deathly beings attacking civilians, watched the hospitals become overrun and the system fall apart. You'd seen the bombs drop, too.

"Words can be meager things, sometimes they fall short." Dale pipes up beside you. You look at Glenn, his face illuminated in a warm glow from the fire. Looking at him lights a sense of comfort and safety within you. He may be young, awkward and clunky, but he saved you.

The conversation goes on, focus almost entirely on Rick. When he turns to Shane, a sincerity to his eyes, you feel almost guilty. As if you are the one harboring the secret of Lori and Shane's affair. "I can't tell you how grateful I am to you, Shane." You have to suppress a sigh at his words. "I can't begin to express it."

"There goes those words falling short again." Dale quips. You can't help but agree. It's not your business, but you feel that words can't begin to express how convoluted the relationship between those three will end up being. How long can you keep secrets from a cop?

Shane leaves shortly after to argue with Ed. Not the first time the drunken man had insisted he needed a larger fire. You keep an eye from your spot, watching Carol and Sophia closely. You don't like Shane, but you know he'd use any excuse to beat on Ed. There's no complaints to be had from you if an altercation between the two started; as long as Carol and Sophia are safe and away from the action.

Somewhat unfortunately, the situation seems to resolve, Shane coming back to the main firepit. "Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind." Dale says once Shane's situated. This time, your sigh does spill out. You weren't a part of the Atlanta group, and yet, all you've been thinking about since they got back was Daryl Dixon.

"I'll tell him," T-dog offers. "I dropped the key, it's on me."

Rick shakes his head. "I cuffed him." You see Glenn shaking his leg from beside you, glancing between T-dog and Rick beyond the fire.

"Guys, it's not a competition. I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy." Ah, so that's why he was so nervous.

"I really don't think Daryl is like Merle," You say, unsure why you feel the need to defend him. Just because he brought Carol to you? "At least not like that." There were definitely other ways Daryl was like Merle. Their brash language, their unkempt demeanor, and perhaps their general strength and hunting skill. Still, Daryl didn't strike you as a racist.

The conversation goes on, discussing what to tell Daryl. Who to take blame, whether to lie or be honest.

"I stopped long enough to chain that door. Staircase is narrow. Maybe half a dozen geeks can squeeze against it at any one time. It's not enough to break through that. Not that chain, not that padlock." T-dog rambles, the fire crackling loudly as a backtrack to his words. "My point– Dixon's alive and he's still up there, handcuffed on that roof. That's on us."

His confirmation that Merle is alive ends the discussion for the night, the group trickles off into their respective tents, and the fire flickers out. Glenn stands from beside you, announcing his departure. You watch him as he leaves, a coldness taking over in his absence.

You stay behind for a moment, no one left at the fire. A few feet away, Shane sits atop the RV. Paying him no mind, you lean back and stare at the sky. It's moments like these that you allow yourself to remember your best friend; allow yourself to picture her face among the stars. You take a deep breath, feeling it stretch your lungs, before breathing it out into the chilly night air. You imagine it takes the weight in your heart with it. But when you're done, standing up and heading to your tent, your chest feels just as heavy.

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

Daryl finishes stringing up cans around the small clearing. It's not much, but it's some form of protection. He lies in the makeshift bed–his bag as a pillow and a t-shirt as a mattress. The trip hadn't been as productive thus far as he'd hoped, only a string of squirrels lay beside him. He'll get up before the sun, and keep going until he finds something of value he decides.

He takes comfort in staring at the night sky. It's where he feels he belongs. Even before the end of the world, he'd spent most nights sleeping outside in nature. It was always safer. In some way, he does find himself feeling more exposed without the knowledge that there are people around him. At the quarry, there's always someone keeping watch. He couldn't trust Merle to keep sober to watch his back.

But soon enough, it'll be back to just him and Merle. He'll have to deal with it.

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

You, Carol, and Lori are on laundry duty this morning. Carol scrubs Rick's sherrif uniform and something about it almost makes you giggle. Wearing a police uniform in the apocalypse is nothing short of something from a comic book.

You have Glenn's hat, trying to spot clean little dried blood stains. "I wish peroxide wasn't as valuable," You comment, scrubbing with all your might on a particularly stubborn stain. "Used to wash out blood like magic." Carol hums, agreeing. Lori stays silent, working on her own laundry with a faraway look.

"Everything okay with you and Rick?" Carol asks, touching Lori's arm gently with a soapy hand. Lori nearly jumps out of her skin, water splashing from her basin. Suds fly through the air, and to your great displeasure, a splotch of soap lands right in your eye.

"Ow, shit!" You cry, dropping Glenn's hat and covering your eye. Lori frantically apologizes.

Due to your momentary loss of vision, you don't notice Glenn approaching you until he's calling out. "Hey, you okay? Let me see," He says. You tilt your head up, trying your best to open your eye. He takes the corner of his shirt and lifts it, using it to gently brush soap away from your eye.

His care for you makes you warm. It feels good to know someone cares. You rapidly blink to clear the remnants of soap, before flashing him a radiant smile. "Thanks." You breathe.

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

Later, you stand next to Glenn, sharing in his grief. Dale and Jim are under the hood of the Dodge Charger, yanking out parts and pieces. Glenn's hands are on his head, brows furrowed in sadness. You pat him on the back. "We'll find another."

"Generators need every drop of fuel they can get. Got no power without it. Sorry, Glenn." Dale calls. Glenn looks down at his feet and you giggle, much to his chagrin.

Before you know it, Rick has approached you, a similar look of amusement on his face. "I thought I'd get to drive it at least a few more days." Glenn mumbles.

"Maybe we'll steal another one someday." Rick echoes your earlier sentiment. He wanders off, likely to find Lori.

"You replacing me with officer friendly?" You joke, nudging Glenn. He exhales through his nose, a small grin on his face.

"I don't know who makes fun of me more." He whines. You roll your eyes, reaching up to steal his hat off his head. Placing it on top your own, you turn and run, laughing while he chases you.

The chase gets cut short by a chorus of screams. You and Glenn freeze in unison, wide eyes meeting each other before you both dash. You hear Carl and Sophia's distinct voices calling out for their mothers.

You run as fast as your feet can carry you, Glenn's hat discarded still on your head. The children are at the edge of the forest, and as the adults arrive, they all run right into their parents arms. Running into the forest behind them, you all find the culprit. A deer, now dead, with a walker feasting on its innards. Your eyes are drawn to the various arrows sticking out of it.

The men jump into action, beating the walker with various objects. It reminds you of prison beatings in movies; ugly, uncoordinated, and inefficient. When they finish, the grunts and huffs silenced, you point to the arrows. "Daryl." You simply offer.

Shane nods, but otherwise they seem to ignore you. "It's the first one we've had up here. They never come this far up the mountain." Dale says, eyes wide.

Suddenly, the tree branches start to move and dried leaves crunch under the weight of something. You all gear up to fight another walker, when Daryl Dixon comes stumbling out of the woods. There's a level of relief to seeing him, knowing that your group didn't lose both their prize hunters in one fell swoop. But there's also a level of dread, a sinking weight in your stomach when you think of the news that needs delivering.

You don't get to think on it long, for Daryl interrupts your thoughts with an outburst. "Son of a bitch. That's my deer! Look at it. All gnawed on by this–" He starts kicking the walker. "–filthy, disease-bearin', motherless, poxy bastard!" You can't help but laugh. You really don't mean to, don't want him to think you're mocking him. The giggles just tumble out one-by-one, unstoppable in their path.

Everyone pauses to look at you, varying degrees of concern and confusion, but you just can't stop laughing. Daryl narrows his eyes at you, "This funny to ya?" You can't answer through your huffs, so Daryl just scoffs, turning his attention back to the walker. It receives one more swift kick to the side.

Dale extends his arm in a notion to stop. "Calm down, son. That's not helping." You know it from the moment it leaves his lips that he'll receive an earful for this. It simply doesn't work to tell a man like Daryl to 'calm down'.

Just as expected, Dale receives the opposite of the intended reaction. "What do you know about it, old man? Why don't ya take that stupid hat and go back to 'on golden pond'?" You, for one, think Dale's bucket hat is very stylish, and you'd let him know that on multiple occasions.

"I've been tracking this deer for miles. Gonna drag it back to camp, cook us up some venison. What do ya think? Do ya think we can cut around this chewed up part right here?" He seems genuine, chewing on his thumb and contemplating with a furrowed brow.

"I would not risk that." Shane says. Daryl sighs, disappointment evident.

"That's a damn shame. I got some squirrel, about a dozen or so. That'll have to do." Daryl moves to leave, and you start to follow behind him.

Suddenly, the decapitated walkers head breathes life once more, snapping it's teeth and groaning. Daryl stops in his tracks, almost making you face-plant right into his back. "Come on, people. What the hell?" He readies his crossbow, shooting the decaying head right between the eyes.

"It's gotta be the brain. Don't y'all know nothing?"

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

Daryl makes it back to the camp first, tossing his string of squirrels by the firepit. "Merle! Get yer ugly ass out here, got us some squirrel! Let's stew 'em up!" He does find it strange that Merle doesn't immediately respond, knowing how loose Merle's jaw is.

Shane's voice, his tone, sends a spiral of uncertainty through him. "Daryl, just slow up a bit, need to talk to you."

Daryl whips around to face Shane. "About what?" Shane places his hands over his belt buckle, eyes darting away from Daryl.

"About Merle. There was a–There was a problem in Atlanta." Daryl let's the words sink in, nodding slowly. He feels that all too familiar lump in his throat, panic digging her claws into his esophagus.

"He dead?" He thinks he must be. What else could Shane be referring to?

"We're not sure." Shane says. That lights a fire in Daryl. Uncertainty has never been his friend. Things didn't feel real without confirmation.

"He either is or he ain't!"

Rick approaches, hand out as if Daryl was some rabid animal. "No easy way to say this, so I'll just say it."

"Who are you?" Daryl snaps, looking this new guy up and down. He looks past him, to everyone at camp, who seems to not bat an eye at the newcomer. The hell did he miss?

"Rick Grimes." The confidence that Rick delivers his name in only makes Daryl more angry.

Daryl huffs, stepping closer to Rick, chest puffed. "Rick grimes, you got something you want to tell me?"

"Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof, hooked him to a piece of metal." Rick tilts his head, locking eyes with Daryl. "He's still there."

Daryl almost laughs, a bitter, angry laugh at the absurdity. "Hold on. Let me process this." He gestures to his head. "You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof and you left him there?" He yells.

"Yeah." Next thing Daryl knows, he's pulled his knife and Shane has him in a chokehold.

"You'd best let me go!" He screeches, thrashing wildly.

Shane only seems to tighten his grip. "Nah, I think it's better if I don't."

"Choke hold's illegal."

Shane has an air of amusement in his tone when he responds, but nothings funny to Daryl right now. "You can file a complaint. Come on, man. We'll keep this up all day."

Rick crouches down to look Daryl in his eye. "I'd like to have a calm discussion on this topic. Do you think we can manage that? Do you think we can manage that?"

Its not Rick's request, or his condescending tone that causes Daryl to agree. It's not Shane's grip either. It's when he looks behind them, to you.

You, with your eyes full of not fear or worry, but of sympathy. It makes shame burn in him, enveloping his body in an overwhelming and uncomfortable warmth. He feels your eyes on him and he feels your pity and it makes him sick. He needs out. If he has to have a peaceful conversation with Rick to get away from your piercing eyes, then so be it.

Imagine Daryl's thrill when Rick proposes you and Glenn to join in the rescue mission for Merle. He'd said something about you and Glenn knowing the city, needing you to retrieve a bag of guns. Daryl narrows his eyes at you and Glenn when you pack into the back of the van. You've still got the kid's hat on, and something about that makes him uncomfortable. Who has time for love in this world?

The ride is mostly silent, some jokes exchanged between you, Glenn, and T-dog. Nothing Daryl pays much attention to. He'd rather go get his brother himself. Eventually Glenn stops the van. "We walk from here."

On the walk, Daryl's heart speeds up the closer he gets to the department store. He's antsy, just wants to see his brother, dead or alive. You seem to notice, speeding your steps a bit to walk in pace with him. "I'm sure he's okay. You Dixons are tough." Daryl just scoffs, refusing to meet your eye.

Each step up to the roof sends a new wave of nerves through his stomach, so he takes them two at a time. T-dog cuts through the padlock and Daryl brushes past him onto the roof. "Merle!" And then he sees it. Grey and decaying, bloody and lifeless. It reminds Daryl of everything else Merle has left for him.

All the ripped old flannels, the half drank beers, hell, even the aged porno mags with the ink smeared and half the pages falling out. Merle never left anything pleasant for Daryl.

Though, while sobbing over Merle's dismembered hand, he has to say that this is the worst hand me down of all.

❀~~__~~❀~~__~~❀

taglist(open): @celtic-crossbow

[daichinom]

LAST REFUGE

chap. 1 Daryl Dixon x Grimes Reader Season 1

⚠️Warning: spoilers, blood, mentions of death and suicide, medical terms, angst, typical TWD violence and gore, vomiting, child injury, allusions to gunshot wound

FlashBack

You were sitting at the coffee table where you were, with your computer on and your books and study notebooks, you were about to finish your medical degree and in a few weeks it was going to be your final exam for your career as a general practitioner, You were beyond stressed and eager to devour all the books you had along with your notes.

Suddenly, you felt the vibration of your cell phone against the part of your thigh, making your mind stop focusing on the text on the monitor, you took your cell phone out of your bag and saw that it was Lori, your sister-in-law.

You couldn't help but frown for a second, sometimes Lori called you because she used to argue with Rick about something and you already knew how your brother was, just like you.

So you preferred to listen to her and sometimes almost ignore her while you were cooking or doing something, but now you were busy, so out of courtesy you answered her.

-"Hello? Lori?"

-"Y/N… Hello… Hey, I need to tell you something… It's about Rick"-

She was agitated, you could barely hear a tremor in her voice over the line.

-"Go ahead, what's up Lori?"

-"When I went to get Carl from school, Shane came and… He told me that Rick had been shot"-

Your mind was left processing that last part.

Rick. Got. Shot.

-"I-I understand… Where are you now? Have you already gone to see him? Do you want me to stay with Carl?"

Your brain quickly abandoned the importance of studying, your family was more important in this case.

-"Please… It would be nice to have you"-

Was all you heard from Lori, and then you said yes and hung up.

FlashForwards

Since Shane had "saved" them from the road, you had been more comfortable in a certain way, more and more people joined in, needing shelter and Shane for a moment became the "leader".

You trusted Shane, you'd known him for a long time, and you sometimes questioned his actions, but you felt like he was doing what was best for everyone.

As for you, you were carrying a basket of clean clothes, ready to hang and dry with the help of the sun, while you did so, Lori stayed by your side.

-"This washing without a washing machine is so overwhelming"- you heard her say, -"yeah, of course"- you answered her, without looking at her, continuing with your thing, that didn't stop Lori from looking at you, -"hey… I'm sorry, It hurts me too.."- Lori said, covering that topic that still made your heart tighten. -"Yes?, I guess it hurts all of us"- you answered, while you looked at her, -"please… If it's because of Shane…"- Lori said, it hadn't taken you long to realize how many times Shane and Lori disappeared, but that wasn't a bother as such, and you made it clear to her while you placed her hand on her shoulder, -"it doesn't bother me, I can understand how you feel…I'm just…I still can't get over it…" - you answered, looking into her eyes, trying to convey your emotions, Lori nodded and hugged you, as a small consolation.

-"Sometimes I wish everything were different.."- you murmured, she ran her hand along your back, pampering you with human and maternal affection, the morning slowly became late, you were washing the last batch of clothes that had been washed. hanging out on the river, along with Jacqui, it was nice to have her, she was a woman with insightful comments.

-"I miss my washer and quick dryer set"- you heard her say as she sank the clothes back into the water, -"me too, faster and more effective"- you answered.

Suddenly, you heard a high-pitched, familiar voice, -"Aunt Y/N, Aunt Y/N!"- you turned and saw Carl, straightening up for a moment, -"what's wrong little one?"- you asked your nephew, - "Shane says come back, there are two men with very big guns" - that was enough for you and Jacqui to get up and pick up the amount of clothes, to hell with that, this was more important.

-"Guide me, honey" - you said to Carl, both of you going up the path of large rocks, when you arrived, you left the basket of clothes aside, grouping yourself with the others, Lori received you with her gaze, Carl was next to you, hugging your hip, it was Shane with his rifle aimed at two men, one had a pistol and the other a crossbow.

-"What's going on here?" - you asked, the gazes of Shane and the two men stayed with you, Shane and the guy with the crossbow moved away in the second but the guy with the gun didn't, on the contrary, it was as if he wanted to keep it as long as possible, disgusting.

-"These guys appeared out of nowhere"- Shane explained without taking his eyes off them, -"what do they want from here?"- You asked the two men, looking at them, -"Oh, sweetheart, we just saw a place full of people and. "We've been alone for a while and we like what we see here" - the man who kept looking at you with predatory eyes spoke, in an attempt to sweeten the ear, you looked at Shane, who didn't know whether to shoot or lower the gun. In the end, he opted for the second.

-"Because of your weapons... are both good at hunting?"- Shane asked, the one with the crossbow lowered his weapon and looked at him defiantly, but he did not speak, his silence was adapted to a "yes", - "well, you guys are left in exchange for giving us meat"- Shane sighed, the two men saw each other and the one with the predatory face shook his shoulders at the one with the crossbow, - "what are their names?" - Shane asked, - "Merle Dixon, he is my brother Daryl" - said the supposed man, pointing his thumb at the man with the crossbow.

[hunted-moth]

Just Like Him  Chapter Five If Only We Were In France

Wordcount // 2k

Summary // Dr. Jenner feels as though it’s better if you stay locked in the basement of the CDC

Warning //Angst, Language, Death, Killing of Walkers, Typical TWD stuff really

OTHER STUFF//wow this really short lmao

A/N // LETSS GOOO last chapter. After this, I'm gonna take a small break from posting chapters. I'll be writing for season two, but I'm gonna write all the drafts and then post them when I'm done editing/proofing it lol

***: Major time Skip/scene change

*: small time skip/scene change

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

          It was quiet and tense as you and Carl read a book on the couch in Lori's room. After the events from that morning, no one was really in the mood to talk. The only words Lori said were to Carl. Telling him to study and stuff. So to get your mind off everything, you decided to read a book on mushrooms and other stuff on forging. 

While you were reading you heard a noise and saw Lori stand up and reach her hand up to the ceiling vents. 

“Something wrong Mom?” Carl asked, you looked to her for answers as she turned to you both.

“It’s, uhh…nothing, the air just stopped working.” she looked around then a moment later the lights went out. You gathered your books and followed Lori as she poked her head out to ask others if they were experiencing the same thing. 

Then from your view, you could see Jenner walking down the hall with his signature speed. Everyone started to bombard him with questions about what was going on and why the lights were out. 

“Energy use is being prioritized” he answered the questions bluntly. Dale got a shocked look on his face at the answer

“Air isn't a priority, and lights?” he asked the man who didn't even blink an eye towards him

“It's not up to me, zone fine is shutting itself down” Then he disappeared behind a corner. You all quickly followed him as Daryl demanded answers from him. Daryl matched his speed and got in his face.

“Hey man I'm talking to you, what do you mean it's shutting itself down??” the more you walked the closer you got to the big room. You soon met up with Rick the others who went to look around.

“What's happening?” Rick demanded, but Jenner just flew past him. Throwing the explanation over his shoulder. 

“The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power. It’s designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half-hour mark.” he checked his watch as he stopped “Right on schedule” and then continued walking.

He stopped, and everyone stared at him. All of them were scared and didn’t know what was gonna happen.  You looked to Dale as he put his arm around you, shielding you. You saw Jenner bow his head and looked at the rest of you before he spoke again.

“It was the French” he spoke cooly and bluntly. You scrunched your eyebrows in confusion, what does the French have to do with this right now, you thought. 

“They were the last ones to hold out as far as I know. While our people were bolting out the doors and committing suicide in the hallways, they stayed in the labs till the end” he took a breath “They thought they were close to a solution” he said sadly.

“What happened?” Jacqui asked his softy. You looked at him again.

“The same thing happening now.” he looked around “No power grid, the place ran out of juice” he threw his arms up like a madman “The whole world runs off fossil fuel, I mean how stupid is that!” Jenner looked to you all again. 

Shane grew pissed as he stared down the scientist. “I'll tell you what” he began to walk towards the man, but Rick cut him off.

“To hell with it Shane, I don't even care” he turned to you three “Lori grab our things, the rest of you, grab your stuff, we’re getting out of here NOW!”

As you all began to leave a loud alarm filled your ears. You covered your ears as VI's voice came over the intercom. 

“30 minutes to decantation” You looked to Lori and Rick confused then looked to the clock, and sure enough, the clock had thirty minutes remaining. During the confusion, you saw Jenner enter something and then you heard Rick yelling at everyone to hurry and grab their belongings. You ran after the metal door about the pass it when it shut on you.

You looked back to see Jenner talking to the computer monitor as everything sunk in. ‘he just locked us in here, were gonna die’ You wanted to cry but at that point, you felt nothing. This was supposed to be a safe haven, nothing was gonna go wrong, but it’s been all wrong since you got here.

But Shane attacked Lori and now the mad scientist just locked in here to die. Your attention was pulled away when you saw Darly run toward Jenner as he tried to hit him. But T-dog and Shane held him back. 

Once Shane and T-dog got Daryl away from Jenner, Rick demanded that he open the doors, but Jenner kept saying that he doesn't control the doors, the computers do 

“Can’t you override the doors? Please you have to do something” you begged the man as he looked back at you then Rick. 

“What happens in twenty-eight minutes?! What happens!?” Rick demanded from Jenner but that pissed Jenner off as he went on a rant about the CDC. But he controlled himself as he sat down again and explained the protocol.

“In the event of a catastrophic power failure—in a terrorist attack, for example—H.I.T.s are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out.” you looked at him confused and scared, Jenner signed and looked down as he had VI defined H.I.T.s

“high-impulse thermo baric fuel-air explosives consist of a two-stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast wave of significantly greater power and duration than any other known explosive except nuclear. The vacuum-pressure effect ignites the oxygen at between 5,000 degrees and 6,000 degrees and is useful when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired” VI explained in its soulless robotic voice.

“It sets the air on fire, it's painless” Jenner tried to comfort everyone but it was drowned out by Carol and Sophia's cries of anguish. “An end to sorrow and grief-” Jenner was cut off by a smash of glass. 

“OPEN THIS DAMN DOOR, NOW!” Daryl yelled making you jump as you looked back at the door now dripping with liquor.

Shane then rushed past you with an axe then Daryl somehow got an axe and they both started to hit the door but it did nothing, it barely left a scratch. A pit began in your stomach as they continued to hack at the door. Jenner kept spewing bullshit about how this was better. You wanted to ring his neck, because if you died, then your mother would have died for nothing.

“Can't make a dent,” Shane said with a deep breath, then Jenner sighed and pinched his nose.

“Those doors are meant to withstand a rocket blaster” That's when you felt Daryl rush past you with the axe held high.

“WELL YOUR HEAD AINT!”  everybody rushed towards him and pulled him back as Jenner stepped back away from the scene. Something in Jenner must've snapped inside him as he stared at Rick.

“You wanted this, you said it was a matter of time before everybody you knew and loved was dead,” Jenner said cooly while looking Rick dead in the eye. Everyone was looking at Rick, with confusion, shock, and anger. 

“What? You really said that after all your big talk?” Shane said in disbelief. Rick looked around before his eyes locked on Lori's confused and hurt face. 

“I had to keep hope alive didn't I?” Rick looked around desperately. But Jenner just interjected again.

“There is no hope, there never was” You looked down solemnly.

“There’s always hope. Maybe it won’t be you, maybe not here but somebody somewhere-” Andrea cut Rick off, making her mind known.

“What part of ‘everything is gone’ do you not understand” Her tone sounded annoyed and done. 

“Listen to your friend. She gets it. This is what takes us down. This is our extinction event.” Jenner reasoned that what he said was common sense. Like it was a known fact that humans would die because the dead were eating the living. You didn't like it, you balled your fist as your body went ridged and some tears leaked from your face.

You really couldn't believe this is where you would die, stuck underground with a whole bunch of people, and not surrounded by family when you were old and frail in a hospital. You couldn't even say goodbye to your brother, you couldn't see him anymore because your body would be nothing, not even dust. 

You were pulled from your thought when you heard a gun cock, making you look up to see Shane also rushing Jenner. You were actually kinda hoping he would shoot him so that he could suffer in his last moments. 

Rick tried to intervene Shane's path but Shane just pushed out of the way and aimed the shotgun. 

“Out of the way, Rick!  Stay out of my way! OPEN THAT DOOR OR I’M GONNA BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF. DO YOU HEAR ME?” he shouted in Jenner's face with the shotgun pointed at his head. Rick ran up to Shane and tried to pull him away again, trying to reason with him.

“Brother, brother, this is not the way you do this. We will never get out of here.” he stared into his eyes, Lori tried to convince him but he gave neither a reaction as he stared into Jenner's soul. You swear you saw Shane's finger twitch around the trigger before Rick spoke again.

“He dies, we all die” Shane looked at Rick then screamed and began to shoot the monitor screens behind Jennifer's head before Rick wrestled the gun out of Shane's hands. During the struggle, Shane began to fight back causing Rick to hit him with the butt of the gun, knocking Shane to the ground.

Rick lectures Shane while handing the gun to T-dog. He then composed himself and looked Jenner dead in the eyes.

“I think you’re lying” Jenner looked at him confused “You’re lying about there being no hope. If that were true, you’d have bolted with the rest or taken the easy way out. You didn’t. You chose the hard path. Why?” Rick got up in his face, looking into his soul.

“It doesn't matter” Jenner brushed it off and looked to the computer screen. But Rick didn't like that answer and questioned him again. Sometimes you forget he’s a cop.

“It does matter, it always matters. You stayed, and others ran, why?” Jenner was getting mad now. You could see the way his eyes and eyebrows narrowed causing his face to winkle in anger. 

“Not because I wanted to. I made a promise.” he stood up and pointed to the screen, TS-19 still projected, “To her. My wife.” he said with so much restraint like he was willing himself to stay composed. 

You felt pity for Jenner when he revealed the identity of the subject, just a smidge, you still wanted to leave the damn basement. 

“She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could I say no?” he said sadly. In the distance you could hear pounding on the door again, looking over your shoulder you saw Daryl trying and failing at breaking the door down. 

“She was dying. It should’ve been me on that table. I wouldn’t have mattered to anybody. She was a loss to the world.  Hell, she ran this place. I just worked here.” he took a breath and composed himself “In our field she was an Einstein. Me? I’m just… Edwin Jenner. She could’ve done something about this. Not me.” Jenner was a broken man on the inside, you could tell. 

“Your wife didn’t have a choice. You do. That’s—that’s all we want—a choice, a chance.” Rick looked at the man earnestly.

“Let us keep trying! As long as we can” Lori pleaded with him. She locked eyes with him, her soft kind, and desperate eyes, then sighed and turned to the keypad again. You hear those femoral beeps again and jump up, grabbing your stuff, but what he said made you bold to the doors.

“I told you, everything topside is locked up” Then the door opened. Everyone was grabbing their stuff and running out. But when you looked back two people didn't follow. 

Andrea and Jaqui. 

You didn't have time to register why didn't follow because Daryl practically dragged you down the halls? You make it to the lobby. Glenn and T-dog went to try the doors but they wouldn't budge. Then Daryl and Shane went at the glass with axes, which didn't work either.

Everyone was freaking out and running, trying to figure out how to get out. Then you saw Shane load a shotgun and back away. When he fired the gun, all it did was cause a huge spider web crack. Then Carol walked up to Rick.

“I think I have something” You looked at her and saw the goddamn grenade in her hand “When I washed your uniform, I found this in your pocket” Rick took the weapon and everyone backed up to hide from the blast. You hid behind some stairwells and crouched down, covering your ears and bracing for the impact.

BOOM

You heard the sound of glass breaking and peeked out from behind the stairs and got up and and ran to the rest of the group, following them out as they ran. The once foul smell of the area didn't bother you, it reminded you that you were alive for another minute. 

Walkers were limping towards your group but you paid no mind as Rick and Shane handled them. Your eyes were on the blue truck in front of you. 

You ran with Daryl as you ran for the blue pickup. He was in the lead making sure there weren't any walkers. He reached the pick-up first and opened the door urging you inside.

“Comon hurry up!” he yelled at you. You jumped he pushed in the foot space area then got in himself. And just as soon as he did that, you heard the building blow. You covered your ears as you felt the truck sway from the blast. Daryl lay flat against the bench of the cab. When it was over you looked out the window to see nothing but fire and rubble. 

“You okay?” he asked as he looked at the building. You nodded your head quietly.

“Ye-yeah, you?” you asked, not tearing your eyes away. All you got was “hpm” in response. Moments later you got out of the foot space and sat down on the seat. Daryl sat on the divers side and started the truck when the other vehicles started driving off. 

Once a beacon of hope for your group, is now reduced to flames. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next // Coming Soon

Previous // A mad Scientist Gave Us Pasta

Taglist // @your-shifting-gurl, @underrated-jellygirl, 

// Masterlist //

[sunkissedandseraphic]

oh! i meant u should create your own!! maybe daryl has a younger sister?

Family Ties || Daryl Dixon & oc!sister

Summary: Daryl Dixon loved his sister more than anything, and they'd give their lives for each other (their relationship throughout the course of the timeline)

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: mentions of child abuse, twd-type violence, brief eluding to sa

A/N: I had so much fun writing this request, lmk if you'd like to see more of this oc in the future!

From the moment the Dixons arrived at the quarry camp, judgments started flying. Glares were cast towards the two redneck brothers and the younger girl that followed them– particularly the one whose wardrobe consisted of flannels with the sleeves ripped off– around like a lost puppy.

The group conversed every moment the family of three was out of earshot, trying to decipher what lay underneath each one’s rough exterior.

“Is that his kid?”

“I feel bad for whatever woman had to carry his product for nine months,”

Lori and Andrea were seated by the water, working on the growing piles of laundry with Carol and Jacqui, sifting through different rumors that recently run throughout the quarry about the Dixons. They couldn’t help the laughing and the whispers hidden behind their hands, eyes flicking to the teen, Belle, across the water with the younger of the two Dixons.

“Belle’s their sister.” A voice came from behind the women. They all turned to see Carl standing to the side, smiling as he gestured over to where they had all just been staring. “She told me. She’s nice, she’s not like her brothers,”

It seemed that Carl had the final say because after his small input, all hushed conversations speculating the Dixons were shut down. Nobody particularly sought any of them out to talk, but the air around the camp shifted to a lighter tone.

Unlike her brothers, once the rumors were cut short, Belle’s sweet demeanor quickly shone. She never hesitated to help around with any job and never failed to provide a sense of relief in pressing moments– which often translated into cracking snide comments after one of Shane’s meltdowns. 

The night of the fish fry, Belle was by Carol and Carl when the walkers invaded. Her heart stopped from terror; Merle was gone, Daryl was out looking for him, and she was surrounded by people she hardly knew. It was no secret she could fight, but God, she just wanted Daryl back. 

Belle was taking down her third walker when she heard the gunfire. Her head whipped around to see Rick bursting into the camp, the few that had followed to Atlanta trailing behind. Everything was a blur, and though desperate to find Daryl’s face, there was too much to process who any of the people fighting were. 

As the last of the horde fell limp, she heard a familiar voice booming in the darkness. “Belle!” Was he back? Could it be him? “Where is she? Where’s my sister?” 

The knife fell from Belle’s grip as she ran, the urge to cry bubbling in her chest. “Daryl!” Her throat burned from screaming for her brother over and over again, and the moment she crashed into him, tears spilled over. 

Daryl wasted no time wrapping his arms around his sister, cradling her head, and rubbing a hand up and down her back. “Hey, s’okay, I’ve gotcha,” he whispered, attempting to provide Belle with any comfort. “I’m here, Bumblebee,”

The group was stunned, watching how dramatically Daryl’s behavior changed to a side of him nobody had ever seen before; they had never seen the redneck so gentle, so caring. They didn’t even know he could be. But, when they saw him walk Belle into a quiet corner of the camp and place her hand over his heart, aiding her back to less panicked breathing, they figured maybe the Dixon siblings weren’t so bad.

________________

“You look like whatever Hershel’s horse shits out,”

Belle heard her brother’s strained laugh as she entered the guest bedroom of the farmhouse, a towel and pitcher of water in her free hand. As she kicked the door closed, she caught sight of Daryl; bandages wrapped around his head, but dirt and blood still strong on his skin. “Feel like it too,” Daryl groaned, watching as the sixteen-year-old fluttered about the room.

Sighing, Belle towered over the bed and placed her hand on Daryl's forehead, relieved there was no fever in sight. “Maybe it’s a sign to take a break. Maybe it’s God fuckin’ with you so you learn to be careful when you do this shit.”

When Daryl heard the crack in his sister’s voice, his heart felt a pinch of agony. The search for Sophia had taken a toll on him, though no matter how much it hurt when Carol’s face swam with disappointment daily after returning empty-handed, it couldn’t compare to how guilty he was seeing Belle’s anxiety increase every new day.

There was quite an age gap between the Dixon siblings: though Merle was only six years older than Daryl, Daryl was nearly twelve years older than Belle. Despite this, the two younger Dixons’ bond was unbreakable; when living with their father, Daryl had always taken the brunt of the abuse for her, and because of that, she clung to Daryl. He was the reason she left the house at such a young age, never having to spend too much of her childhood in that hell. Merle on the other hand was… well, he was Merle. The two were never as close.

“Bee…” Daryl’s voice instantly trailed off, unsure of how to ease her frustrations. As Belle dampened the towel to begin scrubbing the grime from his face, he remained quiet, afraid he would only aggravate his sister further. Once the cloth got dry, Belle set it back in the bowl, and Daryl said the only thing that came to mind.

“I saw Merle.” “What? Where? When? Did he–” Belle spat out, tipping the bowl and splashing water onto the hardwood. She rushed forward, frantic for more information, though stopped short of the bed when Daryl waved his hand.

“Nah, not actually. Hallucinated him.” The explanation was brief, but it still managed to crush Belle’s heart. Even if the two had never gotten along, had never been particularly close, Merle was still her brother. She was allowed to miss him. She was allowed to be scared.

Silence fell over the room once more when Belle returned to scrubbing the filth covering Daryl’s skin. Tension was crushing, and guilt was swirling in Daryl’s stomach. He loved his sister, and he knew she was scared, and he hated to admit it, but so was he. 

“Thought I was gon’ die out there.” 

His words cut deep. Hesitantly, Belle glanced at Daryl and set the rag back in its holder. “You still have family to come back for, y’know,” She mumbled, focusing down and away from Daryl while she sat on the edge of the bed.

Daryl wasted no time extending his arms out to his sister. The moment she accepted, Daryl squeezed her as tight as he could manage, minding his wounds, and pressed his lips to her temple.  

“Always gonna come back for you, Bee,”

_______________________

When the prison fell Daryl escaped with Beth, and Belle found their way out alongside Tyrese and the kids, though neither knew where the other was. Every moment Daryl spent with the younger Greene, his mind drifted to his sister; what if she was dead? What if she had gotten hurt? Or bitten?

Daryl lost count of how many nights he spent staring at the sky, his stomach in knots thinking about where Belle could be. She was seventeen now, but she was still his baby sister. 

When Beth was taken, the last piece of hope within Daryl died. If Beth was gone, Belle had to be. They were gone just like all the others. Then, when he found Rick, Carl, and Michonne after the group he had become included in, The Claimers, ambushed their small camp, a flicker of possibility rekindled. With that spark, though, was the deep horror that came from watching those… monsters put their hands on Carl– what if that was happening to Belle and he couldn’t be there to stop it? What kind of big brother would he be then?

Rick had done everything to reach the older man, but it was useless. His walls towered higher than anything in sight, and Daryl had no plans to let a soul inside them.

Daryl’s stone facade– scarily reminiscent of the person he was back at the quarry– remained until after Terminus, when during the joyous reunion with Carol, she informed him Belle was with Tyrese and Judith that very moment.

Daryl Dixon spent his life running from shadows and screams, but when he watched Belle exit a tiny cabin with those two, his feet moved so fast he was convinced he was flying. In the blink of an eye, Daryl was cradling his sister in his hold, not ashamed of the sob ripped from his throat. “God…” He choked out, face concealed in Belle’s shoulder. It felt like a dream, as though when he opened his eyes, she would be gone again. 

They were both shaking, crying like there was no tomorrow. Despite the multitude of reuniting happening, right then, it was only Daryl and Belle in those woods. They were together again, and goddamnit, that was the only thing that mattered. 

Past fears rushing back, Daryl suddenly pulled away from the embrace and steadied his hands

on Belle, searching up and down for any bite marks or bruises. Belle tried to dismiss the frantic scanning, but when Daryl traced over a fairly fresh cut running down the underside of her forearm, she shook her head and grabbed his hands. “It’s not a walker scratch, I’m okay. I’m okay, Daryl,” Belle smiled. 

This time, Belle trapped Daryl inside a hug, and he put up no fight. He was like putty in her hands, just grateful that his sister was breathing and standing before him. “Didn’t think I was ever gonna see you again,” he admitted, voice cracking. He had almost forgotten what her voice sounded like. “I can't lose you. I can’t lose the only family I got left.”

______________________

“My goodness! Look at this pretty little thing, thinkin’ she can swing her fist wherever she pleases!”Negan– the real Negan, not one of his bullshit goons– taunted, sliding his index finger underneath Belle’s chin. Her jaw grinding shut, eyes glaring into his soul, almost challenging him. Her group, her family, had watched two of their own brutally murdered, so who could blame her for throwing a fist in retaliation? 

The teen caught the leader’s attention. He sauntered over, a smug smile plastered across his lips; he had ideas for Belle in mind. She was headstrong and stubborn, you’d have to be blind and deaf to miss it, but he knew she was scared at her core. 

There was a disgusting gleam in Negan’s eyes. “Well, there is only one correct response for that, right?” He chuckled, turning his head toward the man behind him. “Dwighty-Boy, load her up.”

Belle’s throat constricted the moment Dwight took a single step forward, but before he could get near her, a gruff voice stopped him in his tracks.“No!” Daryl screamed, all gazes settling on him. Negan took his protest as a dare and stooped in front of Daryl, waiting for what Daryl would demand. He wasn’t afraid, though, because he knew it was an act. He had known men like Negan, and there was no way in hell he would let someone like this near his sister. “You take me. You keep your hands off her and you take me.”

In all honesty, Negan couldn’t give two shits which Dixon was kept at The Sanctuary. So, with no opposition, he shrugged and moved aside so Dwight could tie Daryl up and get him into their truck, prepared for the ride back. As he was dragged across the pavement, Daryl snuck one sad grin to Belle, leaving her with something she could remember him by. “No! No, please, take me! Take me! Leave him! Take me!” Belle’s voice was giving out, too afraid to hold back. She couldn’t lose Daryl. Losing the only family she had left would certainly be the end. 

While Daryl gave no resistance, Belle’s wails grew louder, and Negan only rolled his eyes. His baseball bat swung between her and Daryl as a gesture to the siblings, Glenn’s blood stuck to the wood splattering on her top. “You two must be either screwing or from the same litter with your obnoxious indecisiveness, but seein’ those resemblances, that must be your big brother, am I right?” His hand found its way to Belle’s cheek, and she flinched as Negan caressed her. “Well, darling, though very tempting to get another beautiful face at my Sanctuary, I already have my men loading your brother up,”

It had been almost three weeks since the lineup, since Daryl had been ripped away from Belle. She had no idea if her brother was okay, let alone alive at this point– she had seen him once when the Saviors came to collect from Alexandria, but Negan had made sure there was no way she could get to him. 

When Belle saw Daryl in Alexandria that day, she barely recognized the man. Obviously deprived of basic hygiene, he was skittish and silent– seeing Daryl that day was like looking at Daryl when living with their father. He was not himself, and it brought Belle pain to know the scared little boy reappeared from the shadows of his past.

Whoever claimed absence made the heart grow fonder was built on bullshit. Her brother’s absence whisked Belle into a surreal state of hardly eating or sleeping through the weeks, while the nervous habit of picking at the skin around her nails left her fingers cracked and bloody. It would have been easy to mistake her for a walker rather than a living teenager. 

Carol had dragged Belle from the mountain of blankets she trapped herself under to join the group in traveling to Hilltop. Her limbs were heavy, and her mind was somehow more sluggish. She spent the whole ride to the colony with her eyes glued out the window, no thoughts passing through, yet at the same time, everything weighed on her.

As Hilltop’s gates revealed Maggie, Sacha, and Enid, there was no doubt relief touched her heart to see them safe. She welcomed the embraces, but as a man stepped out from behind a row of trailer homes nestled in the heart of Hilltop, Jesus only steps behind, her attitude changed its tune. 

“Daryl!” 

Belle’s voice echoed as she took off, going towards her brother at full speed. She disregarded the tears traveling down her cheeks and barreled into Daryl’s arms, her hands clutching his shirt with all the strength in her body. 

Stumbling backward from the sudden contact, the older Dixon chuckled, ignoring his own misty eyes. “I know, I know…” he cooed, hands combing through her curls, “I’m alright, Bumblebee, I’m okay…”

_______________________

“Plannin’ on goin’ south more past the river, ‘s been a while since I’ve searched that area. Thought maybe I could find somethin’.”

The babble of the stream provided no aid in calming Belle’s fury. Nearly four years had passed since the explosion at the bridge, since Rick had passed– or, as Daryl insisted on believing, disappeared. Once the rubble of the structure settled that tragic day, Daryl set out in search of his missing brother, whether it be as a man or a walker. 

Belle had seen her brother self-destruct her entire life; to cope with their father’s abuse, to cope with those they lost along the way, and to punish himself for what he viewed as failing the ones he loved. She had seen Daryl push himself, but never like this. These were uncharted waters, and she despised the stubborn glimmer of determination.

For six years, Daryl called these woods home and gave his life to find Rick, to bring him home to his community, his wife, and his kids. For six years, Belle had begged for her brother to come home, each plea to no avail. 

“Are you ever gonna come home?” Belle spat venom with her tone, refusing eye contact and instead showering Dog with some greatly deserved attention. If Daryl wouldn’t come home for her, certainly the guilt card could be applied. “Carol keeps asking for you, Judith keeps asking for you; everyone misses you, Daryl.”

However, her guilt-tripping fell deaf on Daryl’s ears as she listened to his persistent, yet predictable, argument for what felt like the hundredth time. “We don’t know if he’s out there, Belle, we never found a body. If I keep lookin’, I might find–” “That’s just it, you don’t know if you’ll ever actually find him!” Every ounce of frustration, the resentment of not being able to convince Daryl to return to where he belonged, toppled over. The wall crumbled down, and there was no blocking the ugly truth that spilled. “You need to accept that, you need to accept he might just be dead!” “Nah! No fuckin’ way!” Their faces were suddenly inches apart, the jab of his finger on her chest earning a flinch from Belle. “Rick ain’t dead, and I ain’t gonna stop looking for him. Alexandria deserves their leader, Michonne don’t deserve to raise her kids alone!”

“She is not alone! Everyone pitches in, but you’d know that if you actually ever came home.” A crack in Belle’s voice gave room for rage to melt into heartache. Daryl needed to understand how badly this was hurting her, hurting their community. “They ask about you all the damn time, Daryl. Judith wants to see you again. They deserve their uncle, Michonne deserves to have you supporting her.”

A conversation meant to just be a check-in on each Dixon sibling had dissolved into a war, and knowing no positive outcome would result, Daryl’s whistle signaled to Dog it was time to take their leave. With a pat on the thigh, Dog trotted beside his owner, and in one last desperate attempt, Belle pulled the final ace from her sleeve. 

“I know you lost a brother on that bridge, but you left a sister.”

Belle shot to kill and damn, she never missed a target. Realizing the effect of his isolation felt like being dunked in cold water, waking him up to what he had been so blind to before. He’d thrown himself into searching for Rick and never paid mind to the family he had left, so convinced that this was what could help those same people. 

Michonne survived on what was real. Judith and RJ survived on their community. Alexandria survived on those bold enough to step up. Belle survived on her family; her brother. Rick may have been all of those things, but so was Daryl. They all needed him, now more than ever, and Belle was no exception.

His footsteps paused, and with a heavy sigh and keeping his back to his sister, Daryl gave his final word on the matter. 

“Tell Judith I’ll see her tomorrow,” _______________________

The air surrounding Hilltop that night was unfamiliar, uneasy. It stirred up memories of the war against the Saviors for many of its inhabitants, and while unwelcome, there was no avoiding it. 

This battle in retaliation to the attacks of the Whisperers was rumored to become the turning point of the bloodshed. Each community had settled on the land to prepare their defense. There were militia stationed around every corner, weapons at the ready for the moment it all began, and tension was inescapable. 

Now twenty-seven, Belle Dixon was willing to lay down her life to defend her people. It was impossible to miss how quickly she had grown from a skittish teenager equipped with hand-me-down survival basics into a warrior, with no restraints of fear or lingering doubts when it came to the new way of life. Belle had become a force of nature overnight, and Daryl never held more pride in the Dixon name. 

“Hey, y’alright?”

Daryl’s voice startled Belle from her spaced-out trance as she scanned the tables of weapons. Her hand reached for her bow and arrow, while also grabbing the set of knives she carried with her at all times. Adjusting her arsenal, Belle cast a grin at her brother while taking note of the setting sun. “Yeah. Let’s fuckin’ go.” _______________________

As the clocks ticked on, just over two years had gone by since Alpha’s reign was defeated, and now, Alexandria had been returned to its former glory and stood as a Commonwealth neighbor. A general sense of serenity ruled each community now, and with the ease of knowing their people rested in capable hands, Daryl decided it was time to continue the search for Rick.

“Please be safe,” Belle fussed, adjusting Daryl’s poncho.

Daryl knew that Belle had doubts about him leaving the Commonwealth’s safety, but he knew she understood why he had to set out once more. It wouldn’t be like before, this time it was different; this time there was nobody to push away, no crushing fear of needing to repay some sort of debt. These were Daryl’s terms, and the calling was too strong to push aside. “Always am, Belle,” Belle scoffed at her brother’s blatant lie, shoving him once he laughed with admission. “No, you’re not. I don’t know how many times you’ve landed in the infirmary or I’ve had to stitch you up myself,” 

Daryl made his first attempt to escape but was stopped by Belle running through the mental checklist she crafted for Daryl’s journey one final time. His second was cut short when she questioned the marked pathways on his map, the same ones she had approved barely fifteen minutes ago. The third, however, was interrupted when Belle asked to check the brakes of his motorcycle, convinced someone may have tampered with them.

“I promise I’ll be fine, Bee,” Daryl assured her, placing his hand on her cheek and smiling, wondering when his baby sister had grown up so fast. “You’ll radio so I know you’re alive?” “I’ll radio so you know I’m alive.”

After hearing the final confirmation, Belle wrapped her arms around Daryl and buried her head into his chest, savoring every last moment she had with her brother. “I love you, Daryl,” she muttered, eyelids falling closed, finding comfort in her brother’s hugs just like she had when she was a child. “Love ya more, Bumblebee.”

[acquaesale]

“Vatos” - The Walking Dead S01E04 (2010), dir. Johan Renck.

[scarisd3ad]

To the end and back [daryl Dixon x reader]

Chapter two - right where you left me

Masterlist

Taglist

Summary - after the world ended you were sure you’d never find love again but a certain archer catches your eyes and changes the entire trajectory of your life.

Warnings - regular twd warnings

Previous >> next

Season 1 ep 3

'Tell it to the frog'

Edited

We all sat around waiting for the others to return from their supply run to Atlanta. Glenn, Merle, Morales, Andrea, Jacqui, and T dog had gone on a supply run while Daryl had gone hunting. I sat talking to Lori and Shane as Lori cut Carl's hair and Shane cleaned his rifle. Carl isn't pleased about his haircut. He fidgets around and has a pout on his face the entire time. "Baby, the more you fidget, the longer it takes, so don't, okay?" Lori says as she combs out her son's hair, snipping little pieces at once. "I'm trying." Carl whines. "Well, try harder." Lori says, trying to focus on Carl's haircut. I laugh. Carl must've not had a haircut since before the outbreak because he was beginning to grow a little mullet. "If you think this is bad, wait till you start shaving. That stings." Shane laughs. "That day comes; you'll be wishing for one of your mama's haircuts." Shane says as he inspects his gun.

"I'll believe that when I see it" Carl says, making Shane and I chuckle. "I'll tell you what... you just get through this with some manly dignity, and tomorrow, I'll teach you something special. I will teach you to catch frogs." Shane says as he's taking apart his rifle. Lori smiles as she continues to cut Carl's hair. "I've caught a frog before," Carl states as he turns a bit, causing Lori to readjust his head. "I said frogs' plural, and it is an art, my friend. It is not to be taken lightly. There are ways and means. Few people know about it." I remember catching frogs on my grandfather's farm as a young kid. I'd take them back to my grandma and grandpa. Grandpa would be proud, but Grandma was always so disgusted by them. She hated that Grandpa would cook them up and eat them. "I'm willing to share my secrets."

Carl looks back at his mom, brows furrowed. "Oh, I'm a girl. You talk to him." Lori says, turning her son's head back towards Shane. "I used to catch frogs," I say. Carl turns his head towards me, brows furrowed again. "You did?" He asks. Lori turns Carls head straight again. "Yep, on my grandpa's farm when I was your age with my brother." Shane raised his eyebrows. "Brother? you have a brother?" Carl asks. I nod. "had a brother," I correct. Matthew, my little brother, was 2 years younger than me; he had dirty blonde hair as he got older and bright blue eyes that will be ingrained in my memories forever. He died 1 day into the outbreak. I miss him every day I go on without him. I wish he'd met these people because he'd love them. "My grandpa used to cook them up on Sunday nights."

"Why'd he cook them?" Carl asks, face contorting in confusion. "You never eat frog legs?" Shane asks. "Eww!" Carl says, his face contorting from confusion into a disgusted look. "No, yum!" Shane corrects as he leans back in his chair a bit. "No, he's right. Eww," Lori contradicts, "they're actually really good, Carl" I say as I fold my arms over my chest. Every day I wake up, I find these people becoming more and more like family than my actual one ever was to me. "You see, she knows what I'm talkin' bout!" Shane says, pointing towards me, which makes me laugh. Lori scrunches up her face in disgust. "When we get down to that last can of beans, you're gonna be loving those frog legs, lady. I can see it now 'Shane, do you think I could have a second helping, please? Ju..just one?'" Shane says, dropping his country accent to imitate Lori. "Yeah, I doubt that." Lori says with an eye roll as both she and Shane laugh.

I turn to see Amy; she's worried about her sister. She should've been back hours ago, but they aren't yet. Dale is standing on top of his RV with a pair of binoculars, just looking out at the road. "I'm..I'm gonna go check in on Amy," I say as I stand up.

Amy is sitting in a chair under the awning of Dale's RV. "You alright, Am's?" I ask she nods slowly. Her arms are crossed over her chest as she mumbles, "They should've been back hours ago." "I'm sure they'r-" I'm cut off by a car alarm blaring. Amy jumps up, and so does Shane. "Talk to me, Dale!" He shouts as he runs towards the RV.

"I can't tell yet," Dale says before looking through his binoculars. "Is it them? Are they back?" Amy asks. "I'll be damned," Dale mutters as we watch a bright red car drive towards our camp. That car is shouting up a storm, probably drawing every Walker in at least a mile's radius towards us. "What is it?" Amy asks.

"A stolen car is my guess."

Lori has her arm wrapped around Carl and one above her eyes, shielding her eyes from the sun. The car pulls in, and we all run towards it. Out comes Glenn. Such a dumbass. I roll my eyes because that boy always seems to do the stupidest goddamn shit. "Holy crap. Turn that damn thing off!" Dale shouts. "I don't know how!" Glenn says with a shrug and the biggest goddamn smile on his face. I run over, pulling him into a hug. I can't lie and say I haven't been a big bag of nerves since he left because I have, but hugging him always makes me feel better.

"Pop the hood, please. Pop the damn hood, please." Shane says, patting the hood of the car harshly.

I let go of Glenn as Amy runs up. "My sister, Andrea-" she's cut off by Shane shouting, "Pop the damn hood!" and him banging on the hood a bit harder. Shane is very upfront with his role as a leader. He's strong, demanding, and the type of person everyone tends to hate, but I've found it easy to get along with him most of the time. He can be an asshole sometimes, but ever since he promised to keep me safe, I've found it easy to understand why he does what he does.

"What, okay, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah," Glenn says, retreating back into his car. Amy is still right at Glenn's side, asking about Andrea. Glenn pops the hood, and Shane gets to work on the vehicle. "Is she okay? Is she all right?" Amy asks, demanding an answer from Glenn as he gets out of the car again. "She's okay! She's okay!" Glenn shouts. Amy's brows furrow, but she does let out a tiny sigh of relief as she asks, "Is she coming back?"

"Yes!"

Amy goes right back into panic mode. "Why isn't she with you? Where is she? Is She okay?" Amy continues to interrogate Glenn, "Yes! Fine. Everybody is." Almost everyone lets out a relieved sigh. We had been knotted up in webs of anxiety all day. "Well, Merle, not so much." No one really worried much about Merle. He could be loud, never listened to anyone, and was obnoxious at times, especially when he was mad. It'd be good to get rid of him. "Are you crazy, drivin' this wailin' bastard up here? You tryin' to draw every Walker for miles?" Shane scolds Glenn as he stands with both hands set on the car's hood. The car was a stupid thing to do; it could've drawn every person and Walker to our location. "I think we're okay," Dale says quietly. "You call being stupid, okay?" Shane argues. Glenn finally turns to me, wrapping his arms around me. "M'glad you're alright," I whisper as I wrap my arms around his neck. he sighs as I lean my head onto his shoulder.

"Well, the alarm was echoing all over these hills. Hard to pinpoint the source," Dale explains. Shane turns around with both hands on his hips, giving Dale a look that tells everyone, 'Don't argue with me.' "I'm not arguing. I'm just saying," Dale says with a shrug. It's almost like Dale can read everyone's expressions because I don't think most people could read Shane like that. "It wouldn't hurt you to think things through a little more carefully next time, would it?" Dale says, raising his voice a bit at Glenn. Glenn lets go of me and says, "Sorry. Got a cool car." with a shrug. I roll my eyes. It's weird, we're going through the zombie fucking apocalypse, and Glenn can still be the sweetest, funniest, happiest man I've ever met.

A large moving truck pulls in next, making everyone focus on it instead of Glenn. Morales steps out first and then Andrea from the back. "Amy," Andrea says as she runs towards her sister. "Andrea!" Amy cries out. The sisters embrace tightly.

"You scared the shit out of me." Amy cries with a little laugh. Morales's kids are running towards their father. "Papi! Daddy!" They cry out as they embrace their father. We all watch the lovely moments between family members. It hurts a bit to us members of the group who've lost family members along the way, but it's nice to see how happy they get. The closest person to a family I have in the group is Glenn. I get so excited to see his face after he goes out in the city. We never know if it's the last time we'll see each other; one day, they could go out and never return. Glenn wraps his arm around my shoulder and whispers, "Got you something while we were out; I'll show you later."

"You are a welcome sight. I thought we had lost you folks for sure." Dale says as he embraces Morales. "How'd y'all get out of there anyway?" Shane speaks up. Morales looks back to the moving truck before saying, "New guy...he got us out." I furrow my brows. I was pretty sure we were the last people alive; we hadn't seen other people since the early days of the outbreak. "New guy?" Shane asks with his brows furrowed together.

"Yeah, crazy Vato just got into town." Morales says as he turns to the moving truck and hollers, "Hey, helicopter boy! Come say hello!"

Out comes a slim brunette man in a police uniform. He's got both hands on his hips as he walks up a few inches. "The guys a cop like you." Morales tells Shane. The guy looks out of breath as he looks over the group. He points towards Lori and Carl before whispering, "Oh my god." And speed walking towards Carl, who's now running towards him. "Dad! Dad!" Carl cries out. The guy kneels down as Carl runs into his arms. Lori is just behind him. Both boys fall to the ground hugging. I'm just now realizing this is Lori's husband, the dead husband Shane had told me about. Lori wasn't one to talk much about him, but Shane and Carl talked about him a lot, mostly reminiscing. Shane talked about how they worked together in the force, and he died at the beginning of the outbreak, but that man wasn't dead. He picks up his son and walks towards Lori. Lori hugs him. She's in disbelief. Then Lori looked up at Shane with the most betrayed facial expression I'd ever seen. I learned from Lori that her husband got shot and went into a coma. Shane told her he died in the hospital. But obviously, he's not dead. He's right here in front of us. I understand that it could've been an accident; he might've not even heard a heartbeat, but the look on Shane's face tells me otherwise.

-

We're all sat around the fire, listening to who I've learned to be Rick tells us how he miraculously woke up and survived. I've got my head in Glenn's lap, and his left arm wrapped around me. "Disoriented. I guess that comes closest. Disoriented." Carl is laying in Rick's lap, and Lori sits beside them. "Fear, confusion..all those things, but..disoriented comes closest." Thunder is coming from a few miles away, which doesn't worry me much; it just frightens me every time it strikes. "Words can be meager things. Sometimes they fall short," Dale says. Glenn gently caresses my arm with his thumb as Rick says, "I felt like I'd been ripped out of my life and put somewhere else." the crickets provide an excellent background for the silence of the night, so it's not just the dark and the loud groans, and growls of walkers in the city. "For a while, I thought I was trapped in some coma dream, something I might not wake up from ever."

"Mom said you died." Carl says quietly. Lori looks at her husband worriedly, like he'd be mad if she told their son that, but he doesn't seem upset. "She had every reason to believe that. Don't you ever doubt it." Rick places his hand on his son's cheek, caressing it lightly, while Lori's hand gently pushes her son's hair back. "When things started to get really bad, they told me at the hospital that they were gonna medevac you and the other patients to Atlanta..." she pauses for a second before continuing, "...and it never happened."

"Well, I'm not surprised after Atlanta fell." Lori nods, whispering "yeah"

"And from the look of that hospital, it got overrun." Rick adds the last time I was in the city, it was absolutely overrun; no one was alive, and the entire place had been taken over by the dead. "Yeah, looks don't deceive. I barely got them out...you know?" Rick looks at Shane, making direct eye contact. "I can't tell you how grateful I am to you, Shane...I can't begin to express it." Shane doesn't answer. He stares at Rick, unable to answer; he has a guilty look on his face that says more than words could ever. "There go those words falling short again..paltry things. " Dale says with a chuckle. I look up at Glenn, who's staring ahead at the fire, zoned out, but when he notices I'm looking up at him, he grins.

Before all this, I was 2 years into med school, living in a shitty apartment with 2 shitty roommates. I wanted to be a doctor. That was dream ever since I was little. Little me was wise to choose that because now the 2 years of training I did does work out. After all, now I'm the group's "doctor." my knowledge doesn't help with complex issues because I had only been in med school for 2 years, but I'm a pro with the basics.

Lori is cuddled up in Rick's arms but staring at Shane with a terrified look. Shane looks mad, maybe jealous even. Ed stands up, throwing another log into the fire.

"Hey, Ed, you want to rethink that log?" We all look at Ed like we're in elementary school again, looking at him like, 'Ooo, you're in trouble'. "It's cold, man." Ed says with his head leaned back before it falls forward a bit. "The cold doesn't change the rules, does it?" Shane says, looking over at Ed. "Keep our fires low, just embers, so we can't be seen from a distance, right?" Shane says just to explain to Rick since his eyebrows are furrowed. "I said it's cold. You should mind your own business for once." Ed argues. It wasn't a good thing to argue with Shane; he's our leader, he makes the rules, and he tells people what to do. If he says no, it means no, that's it. Shane pushes himself to his feet, walks over, and grabs something. I can't really tell what it is. He walks behind Ed, patting him on the back. "Hey, Ed....are sure you want to have this conversation, man?" He asks softly, "Go on. Pull the damn thing out. Go on!"

Carol Ed's wife sits quietly, almost embarrassed of her husband's actions. Finally, she seems fed up with her husband's childish behavior, so she stands up, grabs the log out of the fire, and throws it on the ground. "Christ," Shane mutters. Carol isn't one to really stand up to her husband; I can tell because the look on Ed's face is terrifying. She then walks back around and sits beside her daughter as Shane stomps on the log until it's no longer on fire. Shane kneels down close to Sophia and Carol. "Hey, Carol, Sophia, how are y'all this evening?" He asks.

"Fine. We're just fine." Ed is staring daggers over at his wife. "I'm sorry about the fire." Carol says quietly, almost like she doesn't want her husband to hear. "No, no, no. No apology needed. Y'all have a good night, okay?"

"Thank you," Carol whispers. Sophia looks down at her feet the entire time like she's scared of what her father will do later. "I appreciate the cooperation." Shane stands up and walks back over to his spot. "Have you given any thought to Daryl Dixon? He won't be happy to hear his brother was left behind." Dale says. Daryl wouldn't be happy; he and his brother were the only family they had left. Even though they didn't get along well, he'd be upset.

"I'll tell him. I dropped the key. It's on me." T-dog says quietly. "I cuffed him. That makes it mine." Rick replies. "Guys, it's not a competition. I don't mean to bring race into this, but it might sound better coming from a white guy." Glenn says, his arm still wrapped around me, drawing small circles on my upper arm. The Dixon brothers...well, at least Merle was very racist, and I wouldn't be surprised if Daryl was, too. "I did what I did. Hell, if I'm gonna hide from him."

"We could lie." Amy says from her spot curled up in her sister's arms. "Or tell the truth," Andrea sighs. She's right. We needed to tell Daryl the truth; if we didn't, and he found out we lied, our consequences would be worse. "Merle was out of control. Something had to be done, or he'd have gotten us killed." She was right again; Merle was out of control, and there was never a way to calm him or tell him what to do. Even if Shane tried, he couldn't. Merle was his own boss, and God bless the person who tried to boss him around. "Your husband did what was necessary, and if Merle got left behind, it is nobody's fault but Merle's." Andrea says to Lori. "And that's what we tell Daryl?" Dale asks. I don't think Daryl would just take that as an answer for why we left his brother behind, even if he knew how stubborn his brother was. "I don't see a rational discussion to be had from that, do you?" Dale asks, shaking his head. Dale was a wise older man, like our group's grandfather or even father. He was rational and knew how to survive. People like Shane say that this world wasn't made for Dale, but we'd be dead without Dale. "Word to the wise...we're gonna have our hands full when he gets back from his hunt." We would. Daryl would probably throw a fit and try to hurt someone. He was similar to his brother in expressing his anger through yelling and fists.

"I was scared, and I ran. I'm not ashamed of it," T-dog says with his arms crossed over his chest. "We were all scared. We all ran. What's your point?" Andrea asks. "I stopped long enough to chain that door. Staircase is narrow. Maybe half a dozen geeks can squeeze against it at any one time. It's not enough to break through that..not that chain, not that padlock. My point...my point is..dixon's alive, and he's still up there, handcuffed on that roof. That's on us." T-dog says before getting up and walking away.

"Hey, can I stay in your tent tonight to stay warm?" Glenn whispers just loud enough for me to hear. I nod as I look up at him. I stand up, pushing myself off the ground, and hold my hand out for him to grab. I pull him up, and he wraps his arm around my shoulder. "We're gonna head to bed, goodnight," Glenn says.

We walk towards my tent, his arm still wrapped around me.

He unwraps his arm around me so I can unzip my tent. He gets in first and sits crisscrossed on the far-left side. I get in and then zip the tent back up. I lay down, wrapping myself in blankets, trying to avoid freezing to death. "Do you think this will ever like end?" Glenn asks. I shrug. "I hope so," I whisper. He lays down beside me, propping his head up with his arm. "If this does end, we should get an apartment together." He nods in agreement even though we both know it'll probably never happen. It's so weird. I've only known Glenn for about 2 months, but he knows me better than anyone. It could be because we have so much time to talk. "Where were you before you came here?" I ask in a whispered tone. He lets out a small sigh before saying, "Macon...ended up getting stuck in a pharmacy in Macon with a group of people. they went to some motel, but I ended up leaving to go to Atlanta." I nod before he adds, "They ended up giving me a walkie to keep in touch, but it hasn't worked since I left," he whispers as he lets his head fall onto the pillow. "Do you still have it?" I ask. He nods before reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a small walkie-talkie with stickers on it. I smile as I ask, "Why is it covered in stickers?" with a laugh. "A little girl in the group gave it to me," he says with a small smile. I let out a small sigh as we sat in a comfortable silence together for a few seconds.

"You should go to bed, Glenn," I mumble as I scoot closer to him. "Mhm, I will." I cuddle up next to him, wrapping my arms around his torso. "Don't stay up too late now," I mumble into his chest. "I won't," he says. I can tell he's smiling by the way he says it.

-

I wake up to the sound of birds chirping and the sunlight peering through the sheer fabric of my tent. Glenn's no longer in the tent. He must've gotten up earlier. I push myself off the ground and crawl over to unzip my tent. I get out, zip it back up, and walk over to where the rest of the group is hanging out.

Carol is leaving some clothes out to dry when I walk up to her. "Morning," I say. She gives me a weak smile but replies, "Morning." She washed Rick's clothes. She's a sweet lady, definitely didn't deserve her asshat of a husband.

Glenn is standing, staring at his red car, arms crossed over his chest. Dale and some other guys are striping it clean of gas and anything they need from the vehicle. Glenn's pissed. I walk over to him. "Look at 'em. Vultures." He grumbles. I give him a weak smile as he says, "Yeah, go on, strip it clean." sarcastically. "Generators need every drop of fuel they can get. I have no power without it. Sorry, Glenn," Dale says, patting Glenn's back as he walks by with a gas can. "Thought I'd get to drive it at least a few more days." Glenn mumbles. He's very obviously upset. I wrap an arm around him. "We'll get you another one like it, Glenn," I say, trying to comfort him. He gives me a weak smile. "yeah, maybe."

Glenn and I walk away from the car "are..are you guys gonna try and rescue Merle?" I ask. Glenn shrugs. "It's up to Shane," Glenn says. I nod. I wanted to go. I hadn't been out into the city since the beginning of the outbreak. I wanted to go on a supply run like Andrea got to, but I was never fucking allowed to! I could handle myself. I survived long enough to get here, but Shane was always against it. He always had some lame ass excuse to not let me go. I understood he just wanted to protect me, but if I didn't get experience fighting walkers, I would die if some came stumbling onto our camp.

Shane drives up in his jeep with water. "Waters here, y'all. Just a reminder to boil before use," he says as he exits. A couple of us walk over to Shane's car and help him carry the water jugs. I grab one, but Shane immediately takes it from me. I hate how he sees me as a child incapable of doing things alone.

A blood-curdling scream breaks our attention from the water. "MOM!" Carl screams. Rick and Lori immediately start sprinting towards their son's cries. "DAD!" Carl screams again. "Baby!" Lori yells. Shane is now also flying towards the screams of two children with a shotgun. "MAMA! MOMMY!"

"CARL!" Lori cries out as she's trying to find her child. "CARL! Baby!" Both Sophia and Carl come running out of the forest. Lori falls to her knees with Carl in her arms, examining him, ensuring there are no bites or scratches. "Nothing bit you, nothing scratched you?" Lori says, hugging at her child.

Most of us are also running that way with guns and weapons. "No, I'm okay," Carl says. Both children seem shaken up by whatever they had seen in the woods.

We finally find the Walker that the kids saw. It's in a small clearing surrounded by trees feasting on a dead deer. I scrunch up my nose in disgust. It smells horrible. Walkers smell awful, like shit, and death. It's just pure death. I stand back as the men go ham on the thing. Beating, stabbing it, you name it, they did it. The sound of leaves crunching makes Shane raise his gun.

Amy and Andrea are standing behind me. We're all preparing for the worst: another walker, maybe a horde of them. But then out pops Daryl with his crossbow and about a dozen dead squirrels. Shane lowers his gun but mutters, "Oh, Jesus." In an almost 'oh god, it's him' tone. "Son of a bitch." Daryl curses as he pushes his way through some branches and over some rocks. "That's MY deer!" As Daryl walks towards it, Rick, Morales, and Glenn step away from the deer. "Look at it. All gnawed on by this..." he then began to kick at the Walker.

"..FILTHY.." kick "..DISEASE-BEARING.." kick "..MOTHERLESS.." kick "..POXY BASTARD!"

"Calm down, son, that's not helping," Dale says, not trying to create conflict but to calm the angered man down. Daryl took it as wanting to cause a conflict, though, so he stomps over to Dale, "What do you know about it, old man?! Why don't you take that stupid hat and go back to 'On Golden Pond'!" He shouts before turning back around and walking back towards the deer and Walker.

He sighs as he leans over. "I've been trackin' this deer for miles." He pulls out about three arrows from the deer. "Was gonna drag it back to camp, cook us until some venison." He then pulls out a knife. "What do you think? Do you think we can cut around this chewed-up part right here?" He asks as he leans over the deer and points to the gnawed parts of the deer with his knife. "I would not risk that." Shane replies. The deer looks definitely non-salvageable. Its guts are spilling out and just totally gnawed on. If we tried to eat it, we'd definitely get infected. Daryl sighs. "That's a damn shame." He then turns to the squirrels he has. "I got some squirrels—about a dozen or so. That'll have to do," he sighs.

The Walker's decapitated head then twitches, which is a sight to see. It disgusts Amy, who says, "Oh god." Like she's about to throw up. Andrea then escorts her away from the Walker and probably back to camp. "Come on, people. What the hell?" Daryl says as he shoots the Walker straight in the head. He pulls the arrow out of the Walker. "It's gotta be the brain. Don't y'all know nothin'?" He says with an eye roll. He walks past me, giving me a slight smile.

We follow him as he walks back to camp. "Merle!" He shouts. Everyone's giving each other looks like 'who's gonna tell him?' "Merle! Get your ugly ass out here!" He shouts again. "I got us some squirrel! Let's stew'em up." He says, putting his crossbow down.

Shane decides he will tell him; he is the un-proclaimed group leader, after all. "Daryl, just slow up a bit. I need to talk to you." Shane says. Daryl stops and turns around. "bout what?" He asks, brows furrowed. We're all stopped just a few feet away, watching. We're all crossing our fingers, hoping this won't end badly. "Bout Merle." Shane says as he continues walking past Daryl, "There was a—there was a problem in Atlanta." Shane stops and turns around, putting his hands on his hips. Daryl looks around as we're all kind of gathered around watching. "He dead?" Daryl asks. "We're not sure." As Daryl's brows furrow, Shane replies, "he either is or he ain't!" Rick then steps up and walks over to where Shane and Daryl are. "No easy way to say this, so I'll just say it."

"Who are you?"

"Rick Grimes." Rick replies in his heavy country accent. Someone was going to get hurt; I just knew it. I'm leaning against Shane's jeep, with Glenn standing beside me as we watch. "Rick grimes! you got something you want to tell me?" Daryl shouts angrily. God, I just hope no one gets hurt too bad because I'll have to fix them up.

"Your brother was a danger to us all, so I handcuffed him on a roof hooked him to a piece of metal. He's still there." Rick explains. I can just see Daryl's blood boiling. If steam could come out of his ears, it would be. Daryl turns around, wiping at his eyes like he was about to cry. "Hold on. Let me process this. You're saying you handcuffed my brother to a roof, and you left him there?!" He shouts with tears in his eyes. I actually feel bad for Daryl. If someone had chained my brother up on a roof with Walker able to get to him, I'd be just as angry. "yeah." Rick says quietly. Daryl's face is all scrunched up in anger. He turns around just a bit before launching the squirrels at Rick.

Shane immediately gets in between the two, tackling Daryl to the ground. Daryl falls to the ground with a grunt. T-dog drops the logs he was carrying and is just about to jump in when Daryl pulls out his knife and pushes himself off the ground. "watch the knife!" T-dog shouts. Daryl then tries to swing at Rick but misses. Rick grabs one of Daryl's arms, and Shane comes behind him, both men holding him back. Rick takes a step back, letting Shane take over. "Okay, okay," Shane says, trying to stop Daryl from struggling. We all knew this would happen; Daryl was violent. "You'd best let me go!" Daryl shouts.

"Nah, I think it's better if I don't." Shane's arms are around Daryl's neck in a choke hold, and Daryl grunts and tries to escape Shane's grip. "Choke hold's illegal," Daryl grunts as Shane gets him to the ground. "You can file a complaint," Shane replies sarcastically.

"Come on, man. We'll keep this up all day." Shane warns as Rick kneels down next to Daryl. "I'd like to have a calm discussion on this topic. Do you think we can manage that?" Rick asks Daryl. Daryl doesn't answer. Just continues to wriggle around, trying to get out of their hold. "Do you think we can manage that?" Rick repeats like he's talking to a toddler. Daryl is panting, but let's say, "mhm, yeah." Shane lets him go harshly. "what I did was not on a whim." Rick says, still kneeling down next to Daryl. Daryl's still panting as Rick says, "Your brother does not work and play well with others." Daryl stares at the ground as Rick talks to him. "It's not Rick's fault. I had the key." T-dog says. Both men look up at T-dog. "I dropped it." Daryl's brows furrow. "you couldn't pick it up?!" Daryl asks loudly.

"Well, I dropped it in a drain."

Daryl lets out a loud scoff as he looks down at the ground on his hands and knees. He pushes himself off the ground. "if it's supposed to make me feel better, it doesn't." He says harshly as he throws a handful of rocks back onto the ground as walks past t-dog. "Well, maybe this will.." t-dog says. Daryl stops as t-dog continues, "look, I chained the door to the roof—so the geeks couldn't get at him...with a padlock."

"It's gotta count for something," Rick says. Daryl sighs before wiping his eyes again "hell with all y'all!" Daryl shouts as tears begin to form in his eyes once again. "Just tell me where he is," Daryl says desperately, like he's falling apart without his brother. Even though the two fought like cats and dogs, you could tell they loved each other. "so, I can go get him."

"He'll show you, isn't that, right?" Lori says with one hand on the RV door. Rick's breathing heavily as he looks around. "I'm goin' back." Lori lets out a sigh before climbing into the RV angrily. I understand Lori's anger; she doesn't want her husband, whom she hasn't seen in 2 months, to leave again.

"Are you going back?" I ask, turning to Glenn. "If they want me to yeah." Glenn replies with a nod. "I want to go too," I whisper; Glenn's eyes widen. "You can't," he says; I cross my arms over my chest and let out an angry sigh. I don't know why every man I know chooses to treat me like a child. "I can, and I will. I don't give two fucks what you say." Glenn sighs and places a hand on my shoulder. "You. Can't." I scoff and roll my eyes. "I'm goin' anyways. You can't stop me," I say as I push his arm off me and walk over to Shane.

"I'm going with them." Shane laughs but quickly realizes I'm serious, and his smile drops. "no, you're not." I roll my eyes and cross my arms over my chest. I don't know when he will realize I'm a few years older than Glenn. If Glenn can handle himself out there, so can I. "I can handle myself out there. I want to help!" Shane laughs and grabs my upper arm harshly. "I'm sure you can, but I'm protecting you." I hate how he always uses the excuse that he's protecting me: "I'm not a kid. I can help!" I shout; he rolls his eyes and says, "You sure are actin' like one. If you want to help, cook something or wash some clothes." I push him off of me and scoff. "Fuck you."

Rick walks out of his family's tent, dressed in his police uniform. I'll ask him. Maybe he's not like Shane. "Hey, Rick!" I say, running up to him. He stops, brows furrowed together. I realize I haven't really introduced myself, so I say, " I'm y/n, I have a question." he nods in response, so I say, "Can I go with y'all?" He sighs and looks at me like, 'Do you have any experience?' "I was in that city for a week with only a knife. I know my way around the place," he sighs again, asking, "Can you shoot a gun?" I nod. I've been able to shoot a gun since I was 7 years old. That's just the pros of growing up in rural Georgia with a grandpa who loved to hunt. "I don't care as long as you can handle yourself." I smile. I turn towards Shane, who has a scowl on his face. I grin just to piss him off.

I watch as Rick walks over to Shane; they have a hushed conversation. Shane's obviously pissed about something, maybe it's me, perhaps it's Rick leaving again. Rick begins to walk off while Shane follows shortly behind.

I think Glenn's pissed at me too. I understand he cares about me a lot, but I want to prove myself to the group. I want them to know I'm not just some helpless girl that needs protecting. I walk over to him; he's got his arms crossed with a worried look on his face. "You going with them?" He asks. I nod, and he loudly sighs, "What if you get hurt?" I rolled my eyes; I had been out in that city with only a knife as a weapon for a week. I know how to protect myself. "I'm not. I can handle myself. I did it before," I say, trying to comfort him, but it doesn't seem to work. He grabs my hand and whispers, "Why would you risk your life for Merle Dixon?" with his brows furrowed. I shrug, and He sighs as he drops my hand. "You give me so much anxiety, y/n," he says with a laugh; I laugh as well and say, "And you think you don't do the same to me?" He rolls his eyes before He smiles and grabs my hand.

Shane and Rick walk back into the area where everyone else is bickering. "So, you and Daryl, that's your big plan?" Lori asks Rick from her spot sitting by our campfire. Rick turns to both me and Glenn. Glenn lets out a groan. "Oh, come on." I laugh because he should have known he'd have to go, too. After all, he's our designated errand-runner. "You know the way. You've been there before...in and out, no problem. You said so yourself." Glenn takes his hat off and runs his hand through his hair. "It's not fair of me to ask, I know that, but I'd feel a lot better with you alone. I know she would, too." Rick says, turning to his wife. "That's just great. Now you're not only going to risk y/n's life but three of our men, huh?"

"Four," t-dog corrects.

Daryl huffs. "My day just gets better and better, don't it?" Daryl says as he cleans his arrows. "You see anybody else here stepping up to save your brothers, cracker ass?" T-dog retorts, which makes me laugh because it is quite a coincidence that T-dog is stepping up to help when Merle hates him. "Why you?" Daryl demands. "You wouldn't even begin to understand. You don't speak my language."

Dale walks over and says, "That's four."

"It's not just four. You're putting every single one of us at risk. Just know that, Rick. Come on, you saw that, Walker. It was here. It was in camp. They're moving out of the cities. They come back; we need every ablebody we've got, " Shane says, getting closer to Rick. "We need 'em here. We need 'em to protect the camp." he's pissed. He doesn't want us out there anymore, especially for Merle. He didn't give a shit about any of us, only himself, so why were we even going. To make ourselves feel better, to not have that guilt on our backs.

"It seems to me what you really need most here...are more guns."

"Right, the guns." Glenn says, slowly walking forward. Everyone, including me, needs clarification about what he's talking about. "Wait, what guns?" Shane asks with his eyebrows furrowed. "Six shotguns, two high-powered rifles, over a dozen handguns." Rick states. "I cleaned out the cage back at the station before I left. I dropped it when I got swarmed in Atlanta. It's just sitting there on the street, waiting to be picked up." Rick explained. "Ammo?" Shane asks quietly. "700 rounds, assorted." Rick confirms. Shane bows his head, thinking about what we should do. "You went through hell to find us. Yo-you just got here, and you're gonna turn around and leave?" Lori just couldn't understand why he would risk his life, leaving again. But we needed those guns and ammo. Finding Merle would just be a side quest. "Dad, I-I don't want you to go." Carl stutters out. "To hell with the guns. Shane is right. Merle Dixon? He's not worth one of your lives, even with guns thrown in." Shane runs his hands through his hair as Rick walks towards Lori. Lori stands up and says, "Tell me. Make me understand."

"I owe a debt to a man I met and his little boy." Lori looks down at Carl like, 'We have a kid too?!' Rick grabs Lori's hand. "Lori, if they hadn't taken me in, I'd have died." He says quietly, "It's because of them that I made it back to you at all. They said they'd follow me to Atlanta. they'll walk into the same trap I did if I don't warn him." Lori looks down at her feet before whispering, "What's stoppin' you?" Rick sighs before saying, "the walkie-talkie, the one in the bag I dropped, he's got the other one. Our plan was to connect when they got closer."

Shane's now sat down by his jeep, rubbing at his face, stressed, he's stressed. What are you really supposed to do in this situation? We really need those guns, but we could lose people if we did it. "These are our walkies?" Shane asks. Rick nods and says, "Yeah." with a sigh. "So, use the c.b...what's wrong with that?" Andrea suggests. "The c.b's fine. It's the walkies that suck to crap..date back to the '70s, don't match any other bandwidth, not even the scanners in our cars" Shane explains. Lori avoids Rick's eye contact, looking just behind or at her feet. "I need that bag." Lori doesn't reply. She's just speechless. Rick walks past Lori and to their son. He kneels down in front of Carl. "okay?" Carl just nods. "All right," Rick whispers as he ruffles Carls's hair.

Glenn turns to me. "We're both coming back alive. I swear if you don't, I will literally kill you." I let out a laugh. "Well then, if you don't, I'll do the same," he smiles. "Deal?" "Deal." We both laugh as I lean my head onto his shoulder.

-

I'm sitting in my tent, riffling through my belongings, looking for the handgun my granddad lent me before I headed off to college. I finally found it hidden under a pile of blankets. I stuffed it into my bag and stepped out of my tent. Glenn's already in the large truck Rick and them brought back. Daryl's in the back with t-dog, while Glenn's in the front. I walk over and hop up into the back with Daryl. "You find your gun?" Glenn asks as he turns back towards me. I nod as I take a seat on the metal floor. Rick and Shane walk up to the back of the truck. Shane places down a large black bag. "Hey, Rick, got any rounds in the python?" Shane asks. "No," Rick replies, shaking his head. "Last time we were on the gun range, I'm sure I wound up with a few loose rounds of yours."

Daryl sits next to me and takes my gun out of my hand. He examines it briefly before asking, "You know how to use this, darlin'?" I scoff and roll my eyes. "Yeah, I do," I say as I grab my gun back from him and tuck it back into my bag. "You know how to use that?" I ask sarcastically as I point to his crossbow. He laughs, "Of course I fuckin' do." Rick and Shane walk away, and Daryl stands up. He walks over and closes the back of the truck. The truck starts up, and we're going.

-

We're driving over some train tracks, which is a bit bumpy but not too bad. "He'd better be okay. It's my only word on the matter." Daryl says to T-dog it's a warning; if Merle isn't alive, he's going to hurt someone, and it'll probably be T-dog. "He will," I whisper. Of course, he will. He's fucking Merle. He'd be able to be hit by a truck, and he'd still be alright. "I told you the geeks can't get to him," T-dog says, leaning his head against the metal wall of the truck. "The only thing that's gonna get through that door is us." t-dog adds.

We come to a slow stop, and Glenn takes out the keys. he then turns to us, "We walk from here." We all get out of the car. Both T-dog and Daryl hop out first, then me.

-

Glenn pushes a broken part of a wired fence out of the way so we can all get through. "Merle first or guns?" Rick asks as he turns around towards us. "Merle! We ain't even having this conversation!" Daryl shouts. "We are." Rick says and then turns to Glenn, "You know the geography. It's your call." Glenn sighs before saying, "Merle's closest. The guns would mean doubling back. Merle first." a little out of breath. Daryl's definitely happy about that.

-

We're walking through a department store, and we're all a little on Guard. I've got my gun held out, ready to shoot any moment. We hear a Walker shuffling around, so we all freeze. Rick spots it and points it out to us before we slowly walk around the store, trying to stay as quiet and out of sight as possible. Daryl approaches the rotten, growling thing, and he raises his crossbow "damn, you are one ugly skank." He mutters. It starts to growl at him, getting ready to lunge, but he quickly shoots it straight in the head. It falls to the ground with a thud, and Daryl quickly pulls his arrow out of its head.

We made it to the top with hardly any more walker interference, which I'm grateful for. We all sprint up to the door that leads to the roof, Rick's there first, holding the chain so t-dog can cut it off. He cuts the chain, pulls it off, and Daryl kicks open the door before he runs out. "Merle! Merle!" he shouts as he gets out onto the roof. We follow him as Daryl looks for his brother, but he's not there, just handcuffs cuffed to a pipe, a saw, and a hand.

"No! No!" Daryl cries out over and over again. I feel for Daryl, I really do, but did we all really think Merle was going to stay up there? There was no doubt in my mind that Merle wouldn't find a way to get his ass off this roof, even if that meant sawing off his own hand.

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[that-left-turn]

Describing Michonne as “a black woman holding her own with the main cast” presents her as an outsider with her only trait being her race. You couldn’t even describe her as a mother who found a new life after losing everything because you don’t see her as human. Your fandom is disgusting and racist to it’s sickening core.

We can talk about racism, sure.

The quote is "a black woman holding her own as main cast" since the distinction between 'as' and 'with' changes the meaning of the sentence. She is main cast, she's not an appendage "with" them and it wasn't Michonne I described as a black woman holding her own, it was Danai. It wasn't to belittle her; it was to point out that with institutional racism at work and at a show with a very bad track record of how they treat their black characters/cast members, she's still there and she's a star of the franchise. Look at the lineup for those three spinoffs: it's five white people and Danai. She's the only representation for POC, so yes, she's more than holding her own as a trailblazer.

Hollywood still has a tendency to do tokenism. It was getting better, but with all the strikes last year, white men are closing ranks to assure that they keep the majority of work to themselves. (We're going to see more white men telling more stories by and for other white guys.) TWDU has all-male, all-white people in power of the franchise and I think that's why all the spinoffs are performing badly. They're not instep with their audience and to put it bluntly, TOWL would've done better if Danai had been put in charge instead of the white guy who hired a bunch of failed in-house showrunners to write the other five episodes. (Why wasn't Nana Nkweti given her own episode? She's a talented writer, unlike the rest of Gimple's cronies.)

When Danai was cast as Michonne, the industry was even more white; the power structures ensured that white talent took 90% of the pivotal parts on any show. TWD had Jacqui who was killed off early, without getting much characterization. T-Dog was fleshed out and interesting, but he never got a proper character arc on the show. He got a gruesome death to save a white woman and the inmates at the prison were a homogeneous group of thugs which presented as black—representative of what white people see when they think of prison inmates. Why were those parts all cast with POC save for Axel, which was the biggest role out of them? Sasha lived longer, but her positioning within the greater narrative was deeply problematic and Tyreese was characterized both as someone who didn't contribute to the group's survival: he couldn't kill walkers, and as the black brute who'd go on a rampage and murder a white woman because he couldn't control his temper. That positioning is very, very disturbing and then, he too was killed off before giving his arc any kind of conclusion.

That's the workplace I'm talking about, so yes, the fact that Danai's character survived and she went on to headline one of the spinoffs is a remarkable achievement on her part. She wasn't starting on a level playing field and while she isn't her skin color or her gender, we can't disregard it either because racism and misogyny is very much an active part of that work environment and the world we live in.

Michonne's characterization has been problematic as well because the writers' room for TWD was overwhelmingly one-note white. The concept for her was how white men see black women and she came on the show as a stereotypical "angry black woman," but Danai has imbued the role with so much more than that and elevated her beyond the racist conceits which were tossed her way along the run of the show. I wouldn't describe Michonne as 'a mother who'd lost everything,' because I think that too does the character a disservice. Just like she's more than her race, she's also more than her reproductive abilities, especially given the ugly history in the US of using and controlling black women's bodies.

I think Danai and Michonne are much more than one trait, but the wider system in which both of them exist is deeply racist. Danai doesn't pass the paper bag test (which is still a metric used in entertainment and colorism is a real problem too) unlike Sonequa who's also gone on to great success after leaving the franchise. TWD has had issues lighting their cast members with darker skin tones, which is another problem that we see in other areas, like facial recognition software. The black wigs were bad. TWD should've hired a theatrical master wigmaker who has the expertise to create good wigs for both Danai and Khary, but that comes at a premium they didn't want to spend on their black cast members. Hair and makeup are a challenge because a show needs stylists who know how to work with black hair and skin, and most productions are incredibly lazy about hiring qualified crew. Despite everything being set up (from centuries' worth of racism) to work against her and AMC being a cesspool of inequality, Danai has done amazing. By any metric.

As for fandom, I mostly hover in the periphery, so I can't speak on that with authority, but I have a post where I talk about racism, if you want to get a better sense of what my thinking is? There are a lot of people who say things that are problematic because the educational system doesn't teach "the unsavory bits" of US history, and who don't have much interaction with people of other social classes, races, belief systems, etc. because we still live in a segregated society with zoning districts for schools and housing that are designed to keep the Other out of our neighborhoods. That's not to say ignorance should be a free pass to hurt others, but we have to engage with each other in a non-weaponized manner to affect change and I hope this post can serve a purpose in providing some context to anyone who happens to read it.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to elaborate on my thoughts regarding the institutionalized problems of TWDU.