#It's the only one I've thought in depth about how her backstory ties to her daughters

[inkperch]

...see, I like my other two backstories for Carmilla, but like. The angst if I go with the 'also a fallen angel' idea for my Vaggie Carmine au-

[loquaciousquark]

I finished my Durge run! Got that Tactician achievement too, hoorah. Lots of thoughts about the Dark Urge/Astarion romance under the cut.

My final thoughts now that I've finished it - it's fine. Honestly? It's fine. I think there are some interesting parallels drawn specifically for his backstory with Cazador compared to the Dark Urge trying to resist the urges, but I didn't come out of the romance feeling like it was the end-all be-all One True Romance version for the character. I think there are some interesting dialogue lines ("is today a 'wed you with a delicate veil of blood staining your white curls' kind of day?" made me laugh every time), and it's definitely fun to see some major hurt/comfort vibes play out on screen in the attack-the-romance scene, for sure. That said, I didn't feel like there wasn't anything in that romance I couldn't get for myself with a dominate spell and 4k words of fic with a Tav I like much more.

And like, there's nothing at all wrong with the Dark Urge background! I think it's really interesting to have that internal struggle kind of flavoring the run, and of course it makes sense to have strong Bhaalspawn ties in this particular canon. I think the stuff that's added with Isobel and Scleritas and Orin is very interesting and it definitely added depth to to the Sarevok interactions, and even the conversations with Withers had a lot more nuance! I can definitely see why some people call it Tav+, because it is a customizable character with a lot of extra dialogue options that a regular Tav doesn't get.

That said, the particular type of character that Dark Urge is is one that's not as compelling to me, and setting that up against Astarion's arc felt correspondingly less compelling than the Tav arc I made on my first rogue run. I've played amnesiac characters with a twist before (KOTOR) and in that game I found myself similarly uninvested in the character to the point that I went full Dark Side with her very early in the narrative. To date, she's the only evil main character I've ever intentionally played! There's just something about that blank slate background that doesn't appeal - I find that my characters are generally very strongly shaped by their histories and backstories, even if the details of those backstories develop over the course of the game. They make choices because of who they are and what they've experienced and who they've lost and loved, and I find it hard to create a character with a consistent internal moral needle when there's no backstory to guide it.

And I guess that's part of why the Resist path for the Durge just makes me internally go ???? Because realistically, if I've spent my entire formative life being excitedly murderous, ritually necrophiliac, gleefully cannibalistic, and generally not very nice, why does the amnesia change that? Why would that character want to become something else? How do I internally justify a character making that sort of MASSIVE ethical and moral shift just because of a brainworm and a knock on the noggin? I get that it's fun as a player to try to play a good character with these unexplained evil urges, and I totally get why it's narratively satisfying to see good arise from the ashes of corruption, but I just can't find a way to make the character want to be good in the first place! I had this problem with Revan and I've had it again with the Durge, and that foundational schism was just something I could never really overcome enough to buy into the immersive fiction of the character.

Plus, as far as the Astarion romance goes, I think the Durge arc generally pushes into that similar need to resist the uncontrollable commands given to you by an outsider. It's very much the same space. The thing is, Astarion tells you he knows how important it is to resist those compulsions in the night attack scene, but--we KNOW he couldn't! We know he tried for two hundred years and never once could defy Cazador, and it broke him so badly he gave up resisting at all. And there's some interesting parallels there maybe, that he wants so badly for you to succeed that he's willing to ignore two hundred years of his own personal history, but it puts a pretty despairing tinge to the whole first half of the romance arc. And honestly, that makes me very sad for him.

I think it's just again a less riveting pairing. The Durge/Astarion romance is about both of them overcoming external compulsion through inner will and good choices and white-knuckled defiance, except the timescales of those compulsions are vastly different. And maybe there's a little bit of needing to depend on each other's support to do that, but it's not really so for Durge; you can do the entire Bhaalspawn questline without having Astarion in your party once and you only lose out on a few lines of dialogue. He definitely cares about you, sure, and he can talk to you about how worried he is for you, and that's nice--but there aren't a lot of times where his emotional support is directly critical for you to overcome your urges. On the other hand, I think it's arguable that your friendship (and relationship) with Astarion are directly responsible for his success against Cazador with that last persuasion/insight check combo. If you could have his emotional support be more directly impactful in terms of your ability to resist the urges or Bhaal in Orin's temple, I think I'd be more on board.

In addition, I find two characters going through the exact same narrative arc at the same time not as interesting. Like, if Astarion already had beaten Cazador before the Durge stuff happened and he could directly talk about what was successful for him and help you along the way, I think that might honestly have interested me a bit more. The mirrored arcs we have instead are a little less fascinating than complementary ones. And honestly, there's something about Durge trying to relate to Astarion's centuries of struggle with their own, like, two days of fighting that compulsion, that feels just a little pfeh to me.

And maybe that's why I liked my original Tav so much? As I developed the romance with Astarion, I could shape elements from her backstory (and the way she changed and grew from those events) to make a character that I felt resonated complementarily with Astarion's arc and emotional needs. I could create a character whose defining trait was hope and had always been hope her whole life, because I feel like that's a useful trait to have against an LI who explicitly lost all hope in any rescue. A character who has stubbornly clung to hope throughout a miserable broken life and a miserable broken family paired against a character with a similar background who's lost that hope and has to relearn it--I like that! I like that the characters can teach each other things and can learn from each other. I like that they can make each other better by sharing aspects of themselves that the other person doesn't have.

Having a hopeful Durge doesn't feel the same, because first, that hope is incredibly recent and only comes out over the course of the game because right before the game started, they were still full murderbaby. It's not as longstandingly stubborn despite setback after setback over many many years the way I can have Tav be. And second, again, I can't figure out why an otherwise perfectly content murderous bastard would ever want to hope for anything else after taking a fall off a skyship. I guess that's my biggest problem, that I can't get into the fiction of the character at its baseline well enough to build anything of substance on top of it.

So now, having gone through both the Tav/Astarion romance and the Dark Urge/Astarion romance, I can definitively say I prefer the Tav version. I think the extra stuff you get in the Durge run is fun, and I think the Durge material itself is great and wonderfully tied to the lore outside of the romance, but in terms of the Astarion romance itself, it's just not as captivating. Too similar in the wrong ways and too disjointed in the ways that matter most, and I'd rather have a Tav I can build to fit what I want, someone I can shape to draw out the elements of his character I'm most interested in exploring.

I will say that at one point my Durge sorcerer did roll a 44 on a persuasion check at one point, which was extremely exciting. But I think I'll be going back to my "canon" rogue Tav on my next game to figure out that exact story now that I know her much better, and that'll almost certainly be the one I stick with for future fics.

[manlyquail]

Netflix Avatar

I've got many thoughts I want to get out and so why not just make a "nobody asked and nobody cares" word vomit about my opinions on the Netflix Avatar series!

It'll be below the cut, but let me say I thoroughly enjoyed it but am on the fence about if it did need to exist or not given how perfect the original is. I could go either way honestly, and would watch more if more came out, but I'll explain more stuff in spoilers below.

I'll break this into a few sections, Positives, Negatives, Neutrals, and some sort of summary for my thoughts, but there is probably going to be some overlap since some things could fall into a few categories.

Positive First:

So this could stem from trauma from the last time things came around, but I thought the bending in the series looked way better (for the most part...). The opening scene alone felt like an atonement for how done dirty Earthbenders were in *that movie* and everything felt really fluid.

The characters in general all felt really true to themselves (again, for the most part). I was skeptical at first when news came out about Sokka's removed sexism, but honestly with the way his character arc played out based on the pressure to be a leader and a warrior I think it still worked out fine.

There was a surprising amount in the series that I thought would be material that would just get cut out, which was simultaneously a pro and a con. It was good to see a few certain story elements (SECRET TUNNELLLLL) but the way they overlapped in order to get several things in at the same time makes some of them a pro and some of them a con.

The payoff for "MY CABBAGES" had me rolling. 10/10

For the most part, every time I saw a character I knew immediately who they were. Costume and character design were great, sets and backgrounds were beautiful, everything on this front felt good.

One highlight is tied to the changes made around Zuko's backstory and his crew. His belief in not sacrificing the soldiers and them being assigned to him (and Iroh's telling of this fact to the questioning soldiers) was a great addition in my opinion. It added more depth beyond just the sympathy originally given to Zuko because of his scar.

Each (recent) Avatar getting their own spot in the light was fun. Roku's personality was enjoyable even if he was only around briefly.

Finale was super fun to watch, the effects of the moon changes across all the characters and the spirit rage had me pretty hyped.

In general the balls to burn so many people alive caught me off guard as far as ratings go, but I won't complain!

The sexism addressed in the North was a good bit of development for a few characters, although without Sokka's sexism through the early parts and a moment that really felt close to 'She has help' I'm a little on the fence about the impact it had there.

Absolutely loved June.

There's probably a few smaller things I missed here or there but in general lots of positives, thought with those comes

Negatives:

I'll get this out right away because this was honestly the biggest gripe I had out of anything else. I was not entirely sold on Azula, Ty Lee, and Mai. For me they personally looked too young, the rounded cheeks felt too innocent didn't sell me on the fierce and sharp features Azula demonstrates in the show, but I'm really trying not to get too hung up on this element. Azula is honestly an impossible standard, and I think what was demonstrated was still okay, but I'll be brutally honest that her victory at the very end over Omashu took a lot of the wind out of my sails, especially following the dramatic war of the North. I think maybe the actresses could grow into the characters, but when I picture scenes like the desert standoff with everyone versus Azula it just doesn't vibe.

Airbending when it was first shown felt a little too 'wee I'm on a wire and special effects!' which was somewhat painful. The combat aspects of it felt a lot better and the glider scenes worked, but I was pretty nervous when Aang first made his way down from the towers.

The Kiyoshi scene while cool at first felt brief and somewhat underwhelming. We saw some guys get grabbed by water tentacles and then a big swirl tornado of all the elements but that was really it. People got tossed around and the instant they retreated the state ended. It was cool to see Kiyoshi but I feel like the badassery could've come through at least a little more.

They really nail over the head 'Friendship is magic!' almost too much. Each Avatar basically told Aang not to have attachments or get too close to people because its bad juju, and the lesson 'I only got this far because I work with my friends' got old fast.

Aang additionally didn't do any learning with Katara during her waterbending training headed North. I'm on the fence about this because a lot of extra drama was cut out (no Bato, no pirates and the questioning about morals of stealing a scroll, no jealousy of Katara from Aang's training, etc.). Additionally one weird change (I know I noticed this as a positive earlier), but the Cave of Two Lovers was entirely a Sokka / Katara scene, and the narrative was compressed a little bit so that their 'sibling love' on an emotional level was the reasoning the badgermoles escorted them out, as opposed to either music or following the lights (which they brought up the lights but then made it a red herring?). On that note this cave appeared in Book 2 on the return trip to Omashu, but here it just showed up to get Katara and Sokka into the palace (warned about Palace Guards which I guess also weren't a problem, and this was at the top of the city but tunnels under... anyways...).

A small nitpick but something I remember laughing at; Katara does a training scene where she hits herself in the face with water and proceeds to try and wipe it off, but she's entirely dry, so that... just felt funny.

Avatar Roku didn't get much time in the light either (not even a dragon), and several spirit moments were crammed into one. Yue is a fox spirit that was randomly in the forest, Wan Shi Tong was there to (only heard by Aang) give an ominous warning that his friends would be in danger, and then Koh was also there to... just be a creepy cannibal centipede? These all showed up during the Hei Bai plot thread which didn't even get resolved (the villagers got brought back but I don't recall ever seeing the spirit again; cut for time?). The Koh thing felt out of place as well because this was the motivation for Aang to go all the way to the fire nation to see Roku, who told him to just let them die before Aang took an idol from Koh's mom back to trade for a whole bunch of people. During this 'Koh will feed soon' period Aang made it all the way to the fire nation, did his Roku meditation, got kidnapped by June and turned in to Iroh and Zuko (presumably all the way back on the mainland?), got kidnapped from his kidnapping by Zhao, spent time in prison, then the entire Blue Spirit rescue, with Aang hiding out even longer from fire nation patrols before making sure Zuko got back to his ship safe, and then made it back in time to save everybody from hungry hungry Koh. Honestly just so much here that it made the whole segment feel a tad clunky.

Neutral:

Now this is a list of things that I'm on the fence on and could probably go either way on.

Bumi being the biggest thing here.

Now Bumi's character changes at first were jarring. His identity being revealed immediately was a surprise, but his throwing a big fancy party and seeming like a weirdly hedonistic bad comedian felt off. His original personality I think showed through just enough to keep this from being a negative, but the fun of Bumi was how he was messing with Aang to try and provoke a memory from him while also just being batshit crazy. This would sometimes crop up, and the fight between the two was pretty slick, but otherwise it felt like Bumi was more of just a jaded old man. It became about Aang teaching him a lesson and not the other way around, which in the way felt justified with Bumi being consistently at war for 100 years, but on the other didn't feel like Bumi. I guess I leave this neutral purely on the grounds that this is a reimagining and not just the same story vomited back out in live action, but it's still one of the tougher changes to adapt to.

Another small change is that Aang did zero bending of any of the other elements outside of the Avatar state. He didn't train with Katara as I mentioned, nor did he have his interaction with Jeong Jeong to give him mini trauma about fire bending. Not the biggest deal but still noticed, which makes me wonder how they'll handle his bending in the future.

Azula being Zhou's contact and source of resources felt a little off, as did his learning about the spirits. Zhao was downplayed so much to be a random nobody in the live action version and then he 'needed an edge' and learned about the spirits (and how to kill them with a spirit knife?) right before the siege. Honestly the original of 'I stumbled upon this information unintentionally back when' wasn't great justification either but still.

Several of the Ozai scenes were a little offputting as well. Right before dying (to Iroh instead of the spirit, which again, random change) Zhou mentioned that Zuko only existed as the flames to forge Azula, but there was a lot of sorrowful emotion in Ozai's actor that made him seem oddly sympathetic in a lot of scenes. Lines as well which change context after the 'revelation' are hard to get a feel for as well, such as Ozai's reminders to Azula that it was Zuko and not Zhao that discovered the Avatar. In scenes like this it feels like Ozai is actually trying to defend and support Zuko, but with the motivational thing for Azula was this just him poking the bear? Either way, maybe a subsequent watch will change my thoughts on this, so for now its neutral.

Summary:

Overall I honestly had a good time with the series, but it really just drove me to go back and start the original all over again. It was by no means bad, I'd recommend it as a watch even if just for the numerous easter eggs, but I really don't know if it's good enough to justify existing. There were some changes I really liked, such as the change with Zuko's crew, and some others that I think have potential as reimaginations such as Bumi's narrative, but others like the cave, the Koh stuff, Yue being a fox that showed up in the forest felt like they should've just been left out.

Anyways, I do recommend watching it all the same, especially to get you in the mood for the original and to at the very least set a different standard for live action Avatar than what we had in the past.

Thank you all of nobody for coming to my TED talk. I really just wanted to get this all down somewhere for my own sake but I'd be interested in other's takes on it too!

[somewhereinthepines]

question i've always pondered is if you've had any thoughts about the curator? i really love him and i was wondering what you can say about him!

oh. um. well, tbh i never thought about him in depth lol. i like him. i love how his jeers and scowl always feels like something coming from an old chess buddy. someone, who doesn’t necessarily like you (based on your choices and whatnot), but who always tries to sort of help you along the way. or….maybe, he doesn’t. it’s never fully clear what his true goals or motivations are. he does say, that he’s merely a curator of the stories, which btw is job, i’d kill for, haha. but like, we know that he’s the death, the reaper or smth close to it. so it begs the question, what sort of stories he collects then and how he decides which is worth collecting. bc let’s be real, there is no way, that he has a book for every person who ever died. it sounds like a bit of an overkill lol. then, it’s also odd how he technically allows us/entity/the player to slightly influence the events, despite them already being recorded per say. so does this mean, that each time, he actively messes with smth that has already happened and allows us to change it just bc he can? 

there is a lot of questions! and i doubt, that it would be answered. in fact, i’d rather have it remain a mystery. i really don’t dig the idea of the curator being ‘too human’ or having a backstory. the mere outline of how this whole affair is working would be enough for me, personally speaking. so, when i’m saying that i don’t think about him in depth, i mean him as, well, a character who can have smth beyond the frame, he was introduced in. i don’t have hcs for him. or invision him doing anything, but telling us how much our choice sucks lol. 

howerer, i actually really curious if they will tie up the repeating character models to the very fact, that those are the stories, that the curator tells us. the reason why i’m bringing it up is bc in until dawn, dr hill takes upon the role of the curator, but as we know, he’s personally tied to josh, and josh only. as he is the only one, who sees him. in the quarry, we met an old witch, who has a personal grudge against the hacketts. but unlike in until dawn, we met her as a player. so perhaps, we are the same entity that has those ‘tea parties’ with the curator. but then, what are we? they cannot harm us. nor can they actually influence our choice, if we don’t want them to. 

and then, there is john/dar/holmes/du’met, who are the same looking dude and all have the role of ‘misleading’ and/or present a permanent danger to the player. i love to think, that it was intentional, even if it was probably not. but if they’d make it so, then is he the devil or a demon on your shoulder, rather? esp bc the narrative itself always has a route, where one of the characters andrew/salim/charlie can be complicit with their choices. even if in tdim, it was a fake-out, but still. people can die, depending on if you’d pick their side or not. 

i guess, we’ll see how and what the new installation will bring in the future. what the second season will be about on main. and if they will give us some new info. the curator will surely be there to lay an even thicker mystery upon us, but perhaps, we will be able to figure out what exactly his role is in all of this. and why he let’s us mess with the story, if it was already ‘written’. more so, maybe we will figure out how we can influence those specific timelines and not the ones, where we can never save the protagonists (the intros and such). 

i think, that the curator is a really neat narrative tool. in many ways. and while, i know that a lot of people really adore him, i’m more into the concept of him vs supposed him. prob in the same way, how i liked that dr hill was a fragment of josh’s imagination and his personal voice-inside-the-head. and how i liked the old witch being actually dead and contacting us from someplace else. 

the thing about me is that i can make peace with ‘unknown’ in stories, if they are framed in specific ways and give just enough hints to conjure up some theories. i loved how tdim me essentially was about du’met, not the crew. and how holmes was there as throw away. like you can hc that he was possessed by the devil (in terms of the game, naturally) and that du’met is his reincarnation. or you can just be like ‘well, hector is a copycat’, which wouldn’t be usual. esp in western criminology. 

[empress-violetlight]

🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️

Give me all you have!

please!?🥺🥺🥺

I tend to go in-depth with my OCs, so I'm going to start with just one, if that's okay with you :)

This one might be "cheating", since she technically is a character in Legends -- though one we never actually met or saw. She was only mentioned briefly by her brother, as a warning of how dangerous the Unknown Regions were, as one of the two members of the Fel family who died before reaching 20. I've had enough of women in fiction being used as just props in a male character's backstory, so with my AU, I decided to change that.

Meet Cherith Fel

Read the very little there is about her in Legends here

Birth year: 10 ABY

Race: Human (Corillian family background)

Place of Birth: Nirauan -- Chakra City. Empire of the Hand, the Unknown Regions, the Galaxy Far Far Away

Family: General Baron Soontir Fel -- Father. Syal Antilles Fel -- Mother. Older brothers Davin, Chak and Jagged. Younger brother Cem, younger sister Wynessa. Wedge Antilles --- maternal uncle.  Considers the Chiss Empress Lexx'elarra'nuruodo - Xelarra her honourary aunt.

___

Cherith was born the fourth out of the six Fel children, and first daughter of the renowned Imperial fighter pilot Baron Soontir Fel, considered one of, if not *the* finest pilot to ever get behind the controls of a TIE, any TIE, and his wife, holovid star Syal Antilles Fel, after Soontir had been hand-picked by Grand Admiral Thrawn as one of the elite Imperial officers he trusted with his secret "shadow" Empire in the Unknown Regions, the Empire of the Hand. The fact that Thrawn was willing to trust Fel after he had left the Empire to join the Rebellion speaks volumes of just how good a pilot and officer he was.

Cherith grew up alongside her brothers, and was as eager as they were to follow in their father's vapour trails. She watched impatiently as her three older brothers, Davin, Chak and Jagged, did just that, yearning for her turn. As she grew older, however, something else besides the thrill of flying also caught her attention -- longtime family friend, Mitth'shra'nuruodo -- Shran, son of Grand Admiral Thrawn and Empress Xelarra. The Chiss boy was only a year older than her, best friends with her brother Jagged (himself 3 years older than Cherith), and their mothers were also friends (as had been their fathers, before Grand Admiral Thrawn's death)  so Shran was a constant presence in her life, almost like an extra brother, and she'd often join Jag and Shran in playing video games (especially TIE simulator), and listening to Shran go on with just as much enthusiasm about *his* chosen field, joining the Explorers, an offshoot of the Hand's navy specializing in exploration and scientific discovery over military action. The more Shran told her about it, the more fun it seemed -- exploring new worlds, carving new paths through the Chaos, finding new resources and allies for the Empire of the Hand.

Having four brothers, it took a bit longer than most human girls to realize that boys are sometimes not *completely* disgusting. Her childhood friendship with Shran evolved into a crush she couldn't shake, even after he had left for the Explorers academy. She tried to push her feelings aside, and concentrate on her own entrance into the Empire of the Hand's fighter academy, as her family expected, as even she thought she wanted.

Flying came naturally to Cherith, and she did put her all into her TIE training, striving to be just as good, if not better, than her brothers. However, Cherith found she actually did enjoy piloting larger ships as well. They might not be capable of aerobatics like TIEs, but her understanding of starfighters translated amazingly well to corvettes and frigates, and, more importantly, to Explorer ships, which are surprisingly maneuverable for 300-metre long science vessels. They're meant to be fast and tough, able to do scouting missions as well as exploration. Cherith began to wonder just what she could push such a ship to do if she were at the helm, and not just because of a certain blue boy who *might* be assigned to the same ship, if she were extremely lucky.

At 16, just months away from graduating from the Empire of the Hand's starfighter academy, Cherith faced the most intimating trial of her life -- telling her father she didn't want to be a TIE pilot. She wanted to be an Explorer.

The Baron was quiet for a few minutes after his daughter poured her heart out, then wrapped his arms around her. He reassured Cherith that he would have been far more disappointed if she had only half-heartedly become a TIE pilot just to please him, and would have been devastated if that disappointment in her path led to her getting killed in the field. TIE pilots have to want it more than anything to survive, and he'd much rather have an alive, happy daughter doing something, anything else, than one who died trying to impress him. He advised her to finish her training -- Fels are not quitters, after all. Then, as an officer, she'd have an easier time applying to be an Explorer. Her training time in her new field would also be reduced.

After another year of class studies, and a year as a cadet, Lieutenant Cherith Fel finally came aboard the RRS Intrepid as the junior helms officer. In her new, Explorer blue uniform, with the silver accents denoting her position as a pilot, she finally felt like she was where she belonged.

As she reported to the bridge for her first shift, she finally met her new Captain:

"Welcome to the Intrepid, Lieutenant Fel.  I’m looking forward to serving with you.” said Shran, with the same, cocky, full of himself smile she knew so well from when they had been kids.

She returned the smile, "as am I, Captain."

[exeuntstormtroopers]

Hi Ms. Zappia, you replied to one of my asks a while back (which, thank you, by the way. That made my day). I have another one for you. For some unfortunate reason there's only two of your books at my library, one of them Now Entering Addamsville. Long after I finished reading it, I kept wanting more. As a writer, I've always wondered how other people make such unique and creatively diverse characters plus amazingly in-depth worlds. What's your process?

A couple reactions:

You're welcome!

Oh no! (only two??)

I'm so glad you liked Addamsville!

That's a really interesting question.

I've answered similar questions before, and I feel like I still don't know how to pin down exactly what my process is. I do think making interesting characters and making an in-depth world go hand-in-hand. Your characters, their issues, and their conflicts are informed by the world around them, and the world is at least partially formed by the characters that live inside it.

My stories usually start with a concept or image that can be condensed into a question:

What if you drew anonymously drew a super popular online webcomic, but you had Anxiety(tm) and the fandom's biggest fanfiction writer just moved to your school? (Eliza and Her Monsters)

What if your subconscious could manifest a physical form and hunt you down to take over your body? (Children of Hypnos)

What if you had a bad reputation and the entire town thought you'd committed a horrible crime, and you're one of the only people who knows that the source was actually supernatural? (Now Entering Addamsville)

What if you were stuck in your high school, grotesquely transforming, and you couldn't remember how you'd gotten there or how to get out? (Katzenjammer)

When the idea latches on and I think about it more, I kind of naturally start to make connections and expand on it. One of the first things I figure out is who the main character is, and that's because their conflict and growth (so, their arc) is tied to the concept.

Creative but anxious girl who loves her online world until it turns on her and she spirals

Girl who has been raised knowing that her subconscious will one day come for her, and affects confidence to mask her fear that she'll die

Angry rebel who wants deeply to belong in her own hometown and follow her mother's example, but is constantly beaten down by expectations

Artistic outsider and silent observer who uncovers the depths of her own trauma as she relives her past

Once I know the character's arc, I generally have an idea of how the story should begin and end. I start to think about their friends, their enemies, their mentors. When I start plumbing into backstories, I think about where these people grew up, where their parents grew up, events that happened in their past. Those things inform where they live, their lifestyle, their social status, the power structures they inhabit, etc.

Note: I'm writing this out in a way that might seem like it comes pouring out as soon as I've thought of a concept. That happens seldom. For example, Katzenjammer and Eliza did come into being very soon after I first started thinking about them, but Addamsville, Children of Hypnos, Made You Up, Greymist Fair, and almost all my other ideas went through many drafts and YEARS of thinking about them before they became even a finished first draft. I've been working on Monstrous Sea for 22 years [yeesh] and I'm only now starting to feel like it might be really ready for people to read.

Anyway, once you have the foundation of a world (like the power structures I mentioned above) you can start building on it with even more and more information. Rituals, norms, other details. Fun stuff like shop names and spooky locations and what kind of monsters live in the sea. Think of your story like a living, breathing organism. When you add something to it, how does it work with the whole? How does it change the rest? Dogs pant for a reason.

I'm sure there's more I could say about this but I'm coming up blank right now. I think my brain just detoured somewhere... if anyone has another question about this topic, or something more specific, I'm happy to answer!

[spade-snax]

Alright! Here goes my Bugsnax Grumpus last name headcanon!

(This ended up being way longer than I thought it would've been, oh god-)

I think we all can agree that the headcanon where a Grumpus child has their parent's combined last names as their own last name is a very common headcanon people share. It's a good one! Even I like it a lot. And when applied to OCs or fankids it makes for some hilarious names.

It'd make sense in-canon and I feel like it gives the Grumpus world more depth as their own little tradition. (Honestly give me ANY culture/tradition headcanon for Grumpuses PLEASE THOSE ARE MY FAVORITEEEE I even had one for teeth a while ago that I may share publicly one day!!)

But I've been thinking about this, especially because of Cromdo and my own OCs - Neddy and Rason Honeyfidget. With Rason being Neddy's dad, if we only used this headcanon then Neddy shouldn't have this last name... Well, there's a lore reason why he doesnt and that is that his mother has died while he was still an egg, a while before hatching. Rason made him take on "Honeyfidget" only.

But that's just the backstory that got me thinking at the name traditions as a whole, so I'll try to avoid OC talk any further to make this friendlier for others who do not know about my OCs and are just interested in reading this headcanon.

Another headcanon I want to mention as I apply it to my own is the headcanon that Triffany changed her last name to Bronica's last name as a way to honor her. You can definitely change your name to anything you want in the Grumpus world, but changing your last name to a relative's like your grandparent's last name is possibly quite common!

And now I want to bring up Cromdo and the fact he is divorced. It has been confirmed that Cromdo is divorced and that his name may reflect that. (Though originally it was answered in the AMA that "Cromdo Face" just sounded funny at first and that it is possible that he did loose a half of his last name this way!)

Also I want to say that he wasn't abusive to the child mentioned! I remember there was a small confusion and drama about that. And I believe one of the devs on the YH discord mentioned that the 1# tie was a reference to Octodad. I do not remember if that confirmed that he is a father or if this answer by Sage was possibly wrong. He cannot see the child because he lost custody of them and lost in court. I do not have screenshot evidence of this. On a side-note I believe this could be one of the reasons he grew to be so money hungry. He didn't have enough money back then to keep his child. Again I want to say it could be ONE of the reasons and not the exact reason why he is this way.

This is more so of an ramble about my headcanon and what I want to say rather than some comprehensive thing, I am so sorry dfwergeg it's just how I write and explain things and I gotta mention it ALL (Great addition to "Guzma, your ADHD is showing")

Anyways, back on track with my HC.

But in this/my headcanon - Cromdo is divorced, he has had a child, and lost a part of his last name because of the divorce. I do not know how human marriage last name and stuff works properly so uh, see this as just speculation about a fictional species' culture rather than a carbon copy of our own. Which it clearly isn't LOL

I personally think that you can do multiple things with your last name when you get married! (And how it can affect the child's last name!)

Let's use Chandlo and Snorpy as examples, because I think they make great last name combinations. (And Snorplo is HELLA !!/pos)

- You can change your last name to your partner's last name, like we do commonly. (At least, with all the cultures I'm aware of and how marriage works for us.) Examples: Snorpy Funkbun, Chandlo Fizzlebean

(This one isn't very common to do!)

- You can change one half of your last name to a half from your partner's last name. Examples: Snorpy/Chandlo Funkbun/Fizzlebun

(Not as common either, but it still happens. It is actually more common than the first example. This was the case for Cromdo. I'll get back to this later. Grumps usually reserve this for their childen, which is the most common way of naming your children!)

- You keep your last name after marriage! Example: Snorpy Fizzlebean. Chandlo Funkbun. Canon examples would be Wambus and Triffany as well!

(Most common one to do as many wear their last names with pride or for other reasons - such as Trifanny when she changed her last name to Bronica's last name in this headcanon.)

Before we get to the kids again, I'm gonna go back to Cromdo and what can happen during divorce.

During divorce you can simply change your name back if you changed it, or keep the last name you took from your partner. Many simply change their last names back to what they were originally. Some, if they went by the half/half method, take away the half from their ex-partner only. This leaves some Grumpuses with one worded last names, such as Cromdo.

I think he changed a half of his last name during marriage. After the divorce, he didn't want to "wear" his partner's name anymore and changed his name to Cromdo Face only as Face was a part of his last name he was given at birth. This is most often the default for Grumpuses who have been divorced and took only half of their partner's last name.

If Cromdo - (or any Grumpus with a one-word last name! There's certainly rare cases of Grumpuses who have one word that didn't go through divorce. Possibly Grumpuses with bad attachment to one of their parents - so they change or remove that half of the last name they got from said parent. If their last name was a combination.) - were to re-marry he could take one half of his new partner's last name, or not change his name at all.

I want to get onto how naming a child would work with this situation, so I will talk about ways of naming children before I get back to this! And by naming I of course mean the last names only, lol.

(One rule is that, unless you change your name later in real life for any reason, it's gonna have to be one of these otherwise! Your Grump parent cannot make you up a new last name. It is just a part of the tradition they have. Though re-naming isn't looked upon in any way by the majority of Grumpuses as there are many reasons to do so!! Unless you're a jerk or you value your last name TOO much.) (Also when I say "you" I don't mean YOU as the reader literally. I mean a hypothetical Grumpus child!! It's just how I like wording things.

(...I've been writing for almost an hour, brain scrampled eg)

- Your last name is the combined name of your parent's last names. Examples: Fizzlebun, Funkbean

(VERY COMMON! Most Grumpuses will do this when first naming their child!)

- Your keep one of your parent's last name! Fizzlebean or Funkbun.

(This all works if you have multiple parents btw! Can make for SUPER crazy long and funny last names. This *all* applies to marriage, too! I hope it is easily applicable. I do not want to go in depth on that. Feel free to hit me an ask about this if you want me to explain it more in depth!! I wouldn't want to exclude polyamorous relationships ^^ )

(Also yes, last names that are just the same word repeated twice/multiple times are possible too. Fizzlefizzle, Funkfunk... How fun are these to say? Gives me Grumpus OC name ideas already.)

But yes! Back to Cromdo! Or any Grumpus in the same situation, but as I've stater earlier, Cromdo is just an example here. If he were to re-marry and NOT change his name, there's two posibilities:

His new partner has a full last name.

In this situation, if they have a child they can keep the full last name from Cromdo's partner. Or they can have one word from his partner + Face. For reasons stated below the child cannot have "Face" as their only last name.

His new partner has a one-worded, short last name like he does.

In this situation, if they have a child they have to name it a combination of their last name's. No exception. Having a short last name is a sign of something happening in your life, and it is traditionally not put onto a child, unless they are adopted with no last name. That still counts as something that happened in their life, as their birth parents possibly just gave them away with no care in the world.

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At this point I am almost completely off track, so please do ask me questions as I am not sure where I completely left off - Or rather if there is something I forgot that I wanted to mention.

By the way, for combining last names and such, you can also mis-match! Doesn't even have to be combinations. This applies to everything, even for (Full last name + one-word last names) where it makes sense the most. Examples: Beanfizzle, Bunfunk, Bunbean, Bunfizzle, Beanbun, Beanfunk. I'm personally a big fan of Bunfunk and Beanbun :P)

And this applies to siblings, too! It isn't uncommon for parents naming their children mis-matched last name combinations if they have multiple ones. (This ties into my headcanon for Filbo's many siblings and that he isn't a single child. He's in a big household and has at least 2 siblings. ONE OF WHICH I want to make into an OC! This requires me to make the parents, too, but I am not so bothered about that :P)

I'm out for now, all my brain power has left me a few paragraphs ago and I've got to go eat lunch

But again I encourage people to ask me questions (If anyone was brave enough to read through this!!)

And if I got anything wrong, do let me know! I am not all-knowing and I could've missed some VERY OBVIOUS mistakes.

And sorry if the writing is wonky at times! Sometimes it is done on purpose but sometimes the fact I only pretend I know how to write + the fact English is my second language IS SHOWING

(Also I sometimes just write how I think, without much thought put into the sentence if I don't proof read, so HSDFWERGRGT)

[marshmallowgoop]

wouldn't it be interesting & more sympathic if Satsuki's curel dictership wasn't a facade and that she, like nui, rei and everyone in REVOC supported her mother's goal/idology. Before her Betrayal, we were under the impression she was in on ragyo's plan and while she wouldn't be sadistic/sexual like her mother, she would believe in her mother's totalian ways of ruling & being the calculated, distant, arrogant tyraincal speacker we see in flashbacks & earlier episodes.(1/?)

it would also mean she would embrace life fibers & fate than defy them & wouldn't know about her father/sisters death(or they wouldn't be death at all and also side with ragyo, whichever works). it wld also be the stepping-stones for her(and maybe Ragyo's) redemtion arc of her unlearning these views instead of already KNOWING they're bad. also on ragyo, despite her hatred in the fandom i do like stories/theories where she in given some depth & backstory that fits with her canon character(2/?)

(minus the sexual abuse since i don't believe this show doesn't take any topics of sex/fanservice seriously as most people think). despite her henious acts, she was human once upon a time and real villians aren't monsters with no common humanity. they have their thoughts, emotions, desires, wants & reasons you can sympathic with but wouldn't excuses their actions. Someone who is capable of being a monster if taken a wrong path in life. (3/?)

someone who genuinely don’t realize how evil their behavior is because they think they are doing it for the greater good. i like reading your analysis on her theme and It does fit her more than Satsuki. Reading the songs lyrics over, Ragyo does come across as someone who believes in fate and follows/tied to it and anything that rejects/twisted it is seen as strange and nonsensical to her. (4/?)

plus despite giving herself up to Prime Life fiber, she still has a bit of humanity as indicating in her death & lyrics(if her scars are anything she's only 70% of Life fiber). it does make it kind of tragic that she chose to stick with her damage belifes than take a path of redemption, even if u hate the way she treated those close to her. it's what makes Villians People like us. People are always the hero of their own story(5/?)

it's also help if one were to make the Life fibers more humanized than removing them as most fics do as i have seen your post on Senketsu's scrapped origins. they were responsible for humanity's evolution via clothing after all. despite how common these tropes in fiction are, evolutions don't stop as they just keep envolving to different stages to fit the organism's enviroment to make them stronger. they have no endgoals, espeically onces that envolve world destruction(6/6)

Regarding Satsuki, I've actually written quite a few pieces arguing that her story is one of redemption already, and while she knowingly plays the part of the villain, she comes to realize that she took her role too far and was wrong:

Satsuki Kiryuin: Admitting Wrong

Satsuki Kiryuin: Deliberate Choice to Be Cruel?, Did Satsuki Manipulate Uzu into Blinding Himself?, More, Satsuki’s Influence on Uzu, Satsuki Can’t Be Soft, Satsuki’s Isolation

So, the series' choices with Satsuki are plenty interesting and sympathetic as they are, in my opinion.

That said, I think what’s described as a possible narrative decision for Satsuki already exists with Rei in the OVA. And as much as I dislike the OVA, Rei's plotline makes up about 0% of that dislike. I only wish that Rei had been a more prominent character from the start. That she only gets backstory and development in a totally skippable extra episode is beyond disappointing. Rei deserved so much more.

Regarding Ragyo, I'm not fond of talking about her, so I'm sorry to say that I don't have much to add. I do feel she would have been a more powerful, terrifying villain had she been humanized and given more depth, which is why I find the lyrics of "Blumenkranz" so compelling. I'm glad you liked the old analysis I wrote on the song, thank you! Sorry I don't have much more to say!

Regarding the Life Fibers, as much as I would love a version of Kill la Kill where they get to be more individualized characters, I do recognize that going that direction adds a thick layer of complexity to the series that evidently wasn't desired. But at the same time, I feel like it should have been desired, given that the core of the show is allegedly a “form of intimacy that transcends love and species,” according to scriptwriter Kazuki Nakashima? I figure I've already talked enough on that subject, but still, that Life Fibers (and especially Senketsu) are so removed from fan AUs only adds to my feeling that I have no idea what Kill la Kill is really trying to say and what it wanted audiences to get out of it.

No matter how much I've tried to understand....

[sageblogsthings]

to celebrate The Crimson Moon reaching 30k as of this morning, i thought that i would share the progression of the opening lines of the book, and talk a bit about how the book has grown and changed in the last year! on july 27th it will be exactly a year since i first started writing this and wow i’m not getting emotional you are aha whaaaat

*cough* anywayyysss!!

draft one: please oh god don't judge me

ok i'm not going to talk negatively about my past writing because it got me to where i am today but. [marge i am looking away meme] if you can't tell, i wrote this when i was going through the existential crisis phase of uni and just wanted to live in the woods, i say like i would not currently move to the woods in a heartbeat asdklfja

at the time that i wrote this i was really happy with it because the writing was fun and, as a result, easy! at this point i was just writing in my down time from uni, and i didn't know what the plot was or what my plans were for the book as a whole. because this was just something i did in my down time, i think my writing took on more of a conversational, stream-of-consciousness tone, and that's part of what made this draft (or start of a draft, i only got like 12k in i think) so easy to write. but eventually, as the plot started to come together and i started to gain more inspiration from sff writers as a whole, i realized that this book wasn't heading in the direction i wanted it to. it wasn't just something to do in my free time at that point, it had taken on a life of it's own. and thus, draft two began.

draft two: electric boogaloo

ngl these lines still slap and i love them. there are definitely things i would change, but these lines will be in the current draft of the book, albeit not in the first chapter and altered slightly. when i started this draft, i didn't have an outline but i had a very clear, cinematic image of how i wanted this chapter to go. i think having that before i started writing helped a looooot, both in terms of prose and just being able to convey aspects of the setting/character in the first paragraph. as i continued writing this draft though, i realized that some of the character arcs didn't make sense or were getting a bit messy, and that, based on the story i wanted to tell, it didn't make sense to start with Xalia. while there are six main pov characters in this book, Vanna really is the main character and i wanted that to be clear.

draft three: this time it's personal actually good

these are the current first lines of the book, and honestly my favorite so far! starting off with Vanna rather than Xalia definitely gives the book a different feel, and it's one that's more true to the vision i have for it. in my opinion, this opening does a much better job of setting up some of the book's themes, which admittedly i'm still figuring out lol. grief and loss are major components of all the character arcs, and are integral to the plot itself. switching to present tense has also been a LIFE CHANGER for me. it's funny because, on the second stab at this book, i kept slipping into present tense, but forcing myself back to past tense because i thought present tense sounded weird. turns out it only sounded weird because it was surrounded by past tense, and now that i've written 3 chapters in present tense i can solidly say that this is the way the book was meant to be written. it just feels like my book now, and i'm so happy with where it's headed!

i also made an outline for this draft of the book, and while i've already deviated from it somewhat to work out plot holes or increase ~foreshadowing~ in certain scenes, getting all of the events out of my head and onto paper has really allowed me to just write because i know that i have a document to refer back to if i get stuck on where the story is headed. making the outline also really pushed me to think about character backstories, most of which i had previously established, but now they've changed a lot to fit together more cohesively and integrate with the plot more clearly. i've also changed a lot of the character designs, and as a result of changing the appearances and backstories of a lot of the characters, i feel a lot closer to them and the story itself. the characters have well and truly taken on a life of their own, and now i'm kind of just along for the ride, telling their stories and loving every second of it!

ALSO!! the last big change with this draft, which i just implemented literally this morning and am so so sooooo excited about, is having first person referral, present tense mini-chapters/interludes! it gives the book a really unique sound and ties into the plot really nicely i think! i feel like the structure and form of the story are finally tying into the story itself and it's driving me insane a little bit askdfjka

as of right now i'm not ready to reveal who the pov and referral characters are in these chapters, because i'm debating between a couple ways of doing things and if i go one way that would end up being a pretty big spoiler! that being said, i got really hyped up about it earlier today and rambled in the spoilers section of my server so if you do want that sweet sweet spoilers content....join my server! ;)

also. i hope u all know that i almost deleted that first snippet about ten different times but transparency in writing and all that, i really do want to show how much this book has grown and changed! even if it's going to cause me immense psychic damage to type up the image description for this but i digress

i think that's all for now, and thank you so so much if you read all of that! the love and support this project has received and continues to receive absolutely blow me away, and i can't thank you enough for being part of the journey! <3

the crimson moon taglist (ask to be +/-)

@dallonswords | @isherwoodj | @florraisons | @aetherwrites | @childhoodlovers | @bijouxs | @ziyin | @moonhungers | @piyawrites | @avi-why | @svpphicwrites | @alicewestwater | @ladywithalamp | @spencers-tomes | @discreet-writer | @sunwornpages | @abalonetea | @the-bard-writes | @x-writes | @morganwriteblr​ ​| @aphaimaniis | @stephwriteswords | @ninazeniks ​| @araliensmagica | @fuyugomori | @ryns-ramblings | @greyjaywrites | @marimos

image descriptions below the cut

[header image description]

the background is a dark castle with a checkerboard-patterned marble floor. the hallway fades into black, with the hint of a figure standing in the doorway. white text across the image reads "The Crimson Moon" in a large, all-caps font, and below that reads "wip update post" in thin, lowercase text.

[image description for excerpt one]

I lay on my back, gazing up at the sky. The weather was absolutely perfect. I could hear the crickets singing, the birds chirping, the brook babbling, all that good poetic shit.

I came out here often, just to get away and pretend like I wasn't a part of the fuck-all society I lived in. How could humans be so ignorant? We live in a world with this, I gestured expansively in my mind at the field around me, how can we not see how beautiful it is? How perfect it is? How imperfect we are by comparison?

[image description for excerpt two]

Xalia strode down the marble halls, the soft leather of her shoes meeting each tile with a cacophony of echoes. This was not the first, second, hundredth time that she had walked these passageways, and yet the chill she felt when contained within their depths never seemed to subside. The looming corridors and billowing curtains always seemed to hide sinister whispers that breathed down her neck and pricked at the tips of her ears. Perhaps it was the High Council, with their unnerving masks and owlish eyes, seeming to know and perceive all — or perhaps it was the knowledge that every time she stalked back towards the exit, she would carry the weight of another’s life on her shoulders, a life that she had to take.

[image description for excerpt three]

Vanna’s mother always tells them that grief is a sharp, biting thing; something that latches its teeth around your stomach until you double over with the weight of it. But for Vanna, that’s not quite right. There isn’t something hidden and tucked away behind the confines of their gut because there isn’t anything there at all. As they walk towards the town well — a spell book in one hand and emptiness in the other — they think that their mother got it wrong trying to describe grief in terms of presence. Grief, to them, can only be absence. The absence of light, the absence of a smile, and the absence of a palm which had curled so perfectly into theirs.

[dapperrokyuu]

For the ship bingo I'll give you multiple but if you only want to do one just pick the one you want to talk about most. Sharon x Reim, Ozecho, Amelia x Noé. I swear I've seen you post about Ace Attorney but if I'm making that up ignore this but Faraskye and/or Klapollo

Ask game is here!!!

Yes, I know Ace Attorney, Ive gotchu. Hella down to do more, so Ill do them all, lets gooooo- Under the cut so its not too much scrolling for people, lmao.

Sharon x Reim

Im definitely not against them, but I also didnt really. Need them to be a thing, haha. Could definitely see how some people think its out of nowhere, and if Im to be honest, Im pretty sure this occurred because Mochijun really wanted Reim to be happy, lmao. I also think this was intended to parallel Sheryl x Rufus, but be successful, lmao.

I could say that Reim's behavior in his Side Episode was a bit Weird(TM), as his calculative-ness could come off as, like, Not Being Able To Take A No, but I definitely do think its intended to be just a quirk of his; plus, concerning Sharon's personality, she would definitely hold her ground and not be taken advantage of if Reim was ever a Weird Person, so its honestly fine. The idea of Reim dealing with Sharon’s sadism is also extremely hilarious.

I have considered of the concept that Sharon may have married Reim because of Break, but I just. Dont want to think about it that way, lmao??? Plus, I think Sharon would have the sense not to marry someone just because of Break anyways. Adding to this, Sharon's subtle arc is how she was deprived of being a "normal person," but she embraces it and makes what she wants of it so that it isnt a loss to her. This would translate (for me) into Sharon ultimately not being able to have a relationship with someone who has no understanding of the Abyss and her experiences, so it would make sense that she would bond more with Reim and get closer to him because hes the one who understands most. Ultimately, there isnt too much on them canonically for me to be diehard for them, but it definitely makes sense and has tons of potential that appeals to me.

Also, the Rainsworth has relations with the king of the country, and as Lily would definitely be their daughter after a certain point, theyd have connections with the Baskervilles. Itll just be interesting shenanigans for both of them post-canon, lmao.

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Ozecho

THEYRE GOOD. Thats all I can really say. Echo is like one of my top 3, and she deserves to be happy. And Oz is top 5, and he deserves to be happy. I think their appeal ties into the fact that they have an understanding of each other's situation, and with that, they can confide in each other. Oz can bring Echo into new situations and encourage her to be open, while Echo can be there for Oz's low moments. Overall, I think they can bring the best out of each other, romantically or not. Regardless, theyre very important to each other, uwah... I do enjoy Oz's flirtiness and Echo's bashfulness, its very fun and endearing, haha.

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Amelia x Noé

Theyre very cute, theres just not much of them in canon. All we have seen of them is very surface level, and I think I get engaged when people have a deep understanding of another. Not that its either of their faults, of course, haha.

But regarding aesthetic! I dont know...Amelia can be a cute princess, with Noe as her prince.....which is pretty much how he was in Chapter 1, and could be how Amelia envisions him privately, haha. I do think Amelia's side of the relationship is very interesting, good for her for being subtly forward. Girl's got a GOAL. Theres tons of potential for cuteness and humor, tbh.

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Faraskye

VERY CUTE. Its the whole "theres not much of them in canon," BUT THE POTENTIAL IS VERY LARGE AND INTERESTING. Like, when I thought about it, I thought it was a RARE rarepair that only Id think of, and I felt so big brain, lmao. "Ema would TOTALLY be into Little Thief, and she and Kay could bond over showing each other cool stuff and testing them," but people are WOKE, thankfully. Both also have their own fleshed out backstories, which feeds into the potential and interest. Both of their backstories are also family-themed, so I think they can bond over that as well. I think they would just amaze each other with their respective interest, itd just be so cute and sweet. I wanna see them interact again, ahhhhh- But bright and sassy together? The sassy one also getting brighter with the bright one? Bright one learning how to sass MORE due to the sassy one? Art.

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Klapollo

This ironically got the most circles from me, lmao-

Their tandem is REALLY good, for reasons that most people would commonly say, lmao. Theyve got the fun dynamic but then the deeper understanding that they can confide in each other about. Both are relatable in their own ways, but I would probably relate to Apollo more, lmao. I dont particularly need any ship to be canon, but this one should due to the depth and also it would be funny, lmao. AND KLAVER WOULD COME BACK TO CANON, IN ITSELF A GOOD THING, YEAH. Anyways, who wouldnt mind smooching either of them too, lmao, lmao, lmao-

Hope this was enjoyable, haha. Thank you! @torterrachampion