#Isaiah soooo worried

[bellysoupset]

Sorry for calling

I feel like this needs some more fallout and caretaking tbh

Summary: Matthew calls Isaiah when he gets sick at school shortly after the infection fiasco. Warning for emeto, mentions of scat.

"I'm sorry," Matthew said as he climbed into the car, struggling to close the door behind him.

Isaiah reached over him to pull it shut. "It's no trouble."

Matthew pouted at him, hands hugging his middle.

Isaiah sighed. After the infected wound, they have all been antsy and worried about Matthew's recovery. Matthew insisted on returning back to his classes as fast as possible though, arguing that wolves recovered faster and that the wound was healed anyway.

Isaiah suspected the wound and the infection might have healed, but Matthew's immune system got a hit, which was not something a shadow could repair. Shadows were great with immediate injuries - anything more long-term or slower acting, and they failed.

So when Matthew called him around lunch if Isaiah could pick him up, he jumped into action on high alert, figuring Matthew was struggling with his second day back at uni.

"I'm very very glad you called me," Isaiah added for good measure. Positive reinforcement, right?

"It's just a stomach ache," Matthew grumbled, giving him a sideway look. "But I figured you would be freaked out if I didn't."

That was fair. Isaiah and Seline were both over-worried since the infection, pestering Matthew with questions about his well-being, insisting he tell them every single thing. Maybe he overdid it, running Matthew out of the apartment before he was ready.

They drove a bit in silence, Isaiah taking measured turns. The road wasn't too crowded in the middle of the day, so it should be smooth sailing.

Matthew burped loudly, hand shooting to his mouth. "'scuse me."

"Did you eat something off? Or is it a bug? Do you have a fever? Tell me if-"

"Yeah, no," Matthew said. "Stop with the hundred questions. I just need to lie down."

"We'll be home in ten," Isaiah promised, gripping the wheel tighter.

He kept himself quiet after that, allowing himself occassional glances at Matthew, who resolutely scowled at the window, not meeting his gaze. His hands were still wrapped around his stomach though and he was sheet white, which Isaiah took as an answer enough.

The car stopped at the designated parking spot for their building. It was always a fight for every meter of space in Vienna, so their own parking spot was a luxury, even without the garage.

Isaiah thought he was watchful enough, but he was still surprised when Matthew opened the door, twisted to the side, leaning forward and loudly vomited right from the car.

"Oh man," Isaiah said with a grimace, reaching over to rub his back. Matthew's spine arched under his touch as he heaved, more yellow-coloured puke hitting the pavement.

Matthew burped loudly, shaking his head as if he could get the illness out of his ears, then pitched forward, catching himself barely on the car's door.

"Think you are done? Can you make it inside?" Isaiah asked, taking the car keys out and going around the car.

Matthew spat onto the ground, moaning a little. Isaiah carefully avoided the pool of sick, clasping his shoulder. He cupped the side of his neck. "Yep, feverish alright."

"Shut up," Matthew groaned, then threw his arm around Isaiah's neck for support, letting the dark-haired man to pull him out of the car. The sick wolf was swaying on his feet, hanging on to Isaiah for support. "I wanna lie down."

"Almost there," Isaiah said, readjusting his grip and throwing the car shut.

The building was mercifully empty, so they didn't have to wait very long for the elevator. Matthew had his eyes shut, weight more and more on Isaiah with each step, completely reliant on him. Isaiah didn't know if to be worried or flattered he was trusted so much. Or maybe Matthew was just fighting the nausea, cause he gagged right before the door.

"Just a second," Isaiah said, fumbling with the keys with only one hand available, before dragging Matthew inside to the bathroom on the ground floor.

Matthew was heaving before his knees hit the tiles, a string of sick landing beside the toilet before he managed to orient himself. Isaiah crouched next to him so he wouldn't sway to the side as he heaved up more chunky yellowish-brown lunch.

"Maybe you should have eaten something easier on the stomach," Isaiah mused, his grip tightening as Matthew buried his head in the bowl, back contracting with each heave. He really looked like he was going to choke on the sheer amount.

The other thing was the heat though, radiating off the red-haired man in waves. There was no preventing that with bland foods.

"Owww," Matthew whined, lifting himself up a bit. Another belch sneaked its way out, but it seemed there was finally a pause. "That hurt."

"Bet it did," Isaiah agreed. "Come on, you are going to bed."

"Still feel-urrrp- sick."

"Yeah, well, your fever is off the roof and this is not helping. I will get you a bucket, come on."

Shuffling out of the bathroom was slow and clumsy, with Matthew swaying dizzily and hanging onto Isaiah.

Situating Matthew in bed was an ordeal. Matthew was hugging the bucket like a lifeline, drooling and spitting over it. Isaiah had to fight him out of his sweaty clothes, changing them into pajamas and then collected everything from the kitchen he found helpful. A water bottle, a cup, a damp towel, paracetamol for the fever...

Matthew vomited the pills right after swallowing them, though, so there was no help the fever. He was miserable, curling up under the blankets around his stomach.

Isaiah had it not in his heart to leave him like that, changing his own bottom up and pants into sweat pants and a loose shirt he wouldn't mind getting ruined.

"Matt? Bud, would you like a hot water bottle? Or a sip of water?"

Matthew shook his head, burying his face into the mattress, curling up even more. His hands were digging into his stomach like he wanted to rip his insides open.

Isaiah felt utterly helpless. It wasn't fair he got sick right after going through days of fever and fighting off the infection. He hated it came so close after each other - that it probably caused this in the first place. No getting away from that stupid mistake.

Isaiah circled around the bed worryingly. He didn't want to force his presence just cause he was worried, and he wasn't about to leave but anywhere in the room seemed too far away...

Matthew opened one eye at him, brows knitted together in irritation or pain, Isaiah wasn't so sure. "What are you dancing there for? Hop in."

Isaiah suppressed a smile, sliding into the bed beside him.

Isaiah wasn't sure what was and wasn't allowed, but Matthew quickly solved the issue as he turned from the edge of the bed to press his forehead against Isaiah's tigh.

"How are you doing down there?" Isaiah leaned against the wall sitting upright, hand hovering over the overheated face.

"Ugh. Cramping like a bitch."

"Wanna try some water?"

"Bleh. You want to finish me off?"

Isaiah shook his head in exasperation, grabbing the discarded wet towel and planting it back over Matthew's face.

The redhead grumbled, swiping at his hand half-heartedly. "Ow. That's cold."

The next hour crawled slowly forward. Matthew would sometimes reach for the bucket, mustering enough energy to heave over it emptily, only to slump right back down against Isaiah, curling around his stomach and moaning pitifully.

Isaiah sometimes dared to put a hand on his back or check his forehead for fever, but he wasn't sure what else to do. Whatever Marthew was doing couldn't count as sleep, as he turned and tossed around, throwing his blankets off only to shiver from the cold a few minutes later.

Isaiah was at his wit's end as Matthew dry heaved over the bucket for another 10 minutes painfully. He was also afraid to move from his spot, anxiety pinning him to place beside the ailing man.

"Come on, bud, just a sip of water. You will be dehydrated like this."

"Few hours won't matter," he grumbled, face twisting.

"Please."

Matthew groaned, somehow still managing to make that sound angrily and hoisted himself up on shaky hands.

Isaiah brought the bottle to his face, helping to steady it as Matthew took a few tentative sips, before chugging down a long sip.

"Hey, easy there." Isaiah gently pulled the bottle away.

Matthew scowled at him. "At least it won't burn so much coming up."

Isaiah sighed, both of the settling back into their positions. Keeping tabs on the time, he was about to call it a success, when Matthew didn't throw up in almost 40 minutes.

The silence was interrupted by sudden gurgling from Matthew's stomach.

Matthew moaned, pulled his legs up. "You are fucking kidding me."

"Matt?"

Matthew grumbled under his breath, uncurling with obvious effort and sitting up clumsily.

"What are you doing? Stay still-"

"Help me up, damn it," Matthew bossed, swaying as he threw his legs over the edge of the bed and almost face planting onto the ground.

Isaiah got up in an instant, hurrying to his side.

Matthew reached his hands towards him, two red splotches on his cheeks shining on his pale face. "I need the blasted bathroom. Stop asking."

Isaiah obediently kept silent, though Matthew's stomach decidedly did not. As the walked, Isaiah's arm around Matthew's waist, it gurgled loudly, making Matthew cringe in response.

When they reached the bathroom, Matthew untangled himself, shooing him away. "Don't you dare come in. I'm tolerating you enough."

Isaiah almost chuckled at the response, staying by the door. So the water wasn't staying down either way. Glorious.

He waited until Matthew appeared in the door, shaky and ashen and reaching for him without meeting his eyes. But he ended up curled against his leg again when they reached the bed.

After another hour of restless turning and sweating with no end in sight, he ended up messaging Seline.

When are you coming home?

It's Tuesday. Long day, remember? I got classes till 9 pm.

Isaiah groaned quietly. It was only half four. Matthew is sick. I don't know what to do, nothing is helping. Do you have anything in the kitchen I could give him?

No answer came for about two minutes, before his phone beeped again. I'll be there in half an hour.

He felt guilty immediately. No, it's fine. Just tell me what to do. He can't hold down anything.

See you soon, she wrote, adding a heart emoji.

***

Things were still a bit weird between her and Matthew. Especially since the infection.

She felt incredibly guilty he didn't tell them. That she made him feel like he couldn't tell them.

He was stupid for it, sure, but how could he doubt she would drop everything and help him, if he was in trouble? No matter what tension or argument or unresolved issues were between them? Wasn't that obvious?

The answer was simple. The same way she could believe he would hurt her.

Was it truly so he would? Since the conversation with Hector, it kept nagging at her. "It doesn't react to what I do, but to what you feel."

That's what he said. And maybe the problem was truly her and not Matthew. If she had trusted him, she wouldn't have been afraid no matter what expression he made or what his shadow did.

Seline was still thinking that over as she stepped into the apartment. The shoes were all over the hall again. She rolled her eyes, tucking away hers, Matthew's and Isaiah's, then hanging both of their hastily discarded coats.

She tiptoed closer to the room. The door was slightly open. The nervousness was making her stomach tight. It was stupid. Matthew was sick, Isaiah was certainly freaking out about it and she had some idea what to do.

But what if Matthew didn't want her there?

That made crossing the threshold of the door downright impossible. Her hands were freezing - she felt frozen to the spot.

She wasn't that good of a caretaker anyway. She would like to be, but when it came to someone being sick, she was more of the "fetch this" or "write an email" or "give cheerful advice" kind of person. The girlish noises and the comforting words of sympathy or whatever it was didn't come naturally to her - more like they felt pathetic and out of place and with no guarantee they were helping.

If you wanted a pragmatic solution, she was down for it. Emotional comfort during physical distress? Not so much. How many times did she not know how to comfort her mother during one of her chronic migraines, simply sitting beside her? How many times did she just sit by her brother as he cried, not knowing what to say or what to do with her hands or where to look?

Seline could take the discomfort and the gross details, find a good ointment, suggest the right herbs, make the right tea. But holding someone's hand was not there. Maybe there was something wrong with her. Maybe she just rationalized the abilities out of herself.

Taking a deep breath, she stuck her head into the room.

Matthew was curled up on his side, blankets twisted around his legs in a mess. Isaiah was sitting upright next to him, hand on his shoulder as if he was trying to share some of his health with him through contact alone. Isaiah's hair stuck out in weird directions and he looked just as pale as Matthew. Add the fact he was out of his suit, which as alarming enough. Seline didn't think she ever saw him in sweat pants and an informal loose shirt before.

There it went again. Isaiah, she could read. She even dared to touch him or offer comfort or do whatever she felt like, because she felt first with him, and second-guessed herself later. Usually, after he had already responded - favorably till now - saving her from the panic she was out of place.

Isaiah looked up at her, their eyes locking. She gave him a hesitant smile. He looked back at Matthew and then to her, look pleading and hopeless.

Well, at least that was easy to solve. She went to the kitchen, gathering her idea and then returned quietly as possible, to Matthew's bedside table.

"I got these anti-emetic pills. If they work, we can get him some fever meds too and then he could just sleep it off. These things don't have a long duration anyway," she whispered.

Matthew groaned and turned to look at her, rubbing his eyes sleepily. "He is right here, you know."

She winced, then held out the package of pills to him.

They looked at each other in awkward silence, Matthew's gaze tired and confused, Seline's shy and wavering.

Isaiah was obviously too impatient for it, cause he reached over Matthew to grab the pills, grabbing a glass of water with the other hand. Before she could move, he was already offering them while Matthew lifted himself on one elbow.

There. Role done. What else was she supposed to do? The sensation of pins and needles run through her, like everytime when a room became stifling and unwelcoming, when she knew she wasn't supposed to be there anymore.

She had already left a note for her professor she wasn't coming though. Not like she could turn around and leave.

Matthew fell down back on the bed. Isaiah skillfully removed the glass out of the way so it wasn't knocked over.

Seline crossed her legs at the ankles, hugging herself close. She should change out of her outside clothes.

Isaiah raised an eyebrow at her and then started to untangle himself from the bed.

"Alright. I'll go make some tea. Peppermint is good for the stomach right?"

"I can mak-" she interrupted.

"Nope, I will. Need to stand a bit, my back hurts. Would you mind staying with him, please?"

He wasn't exactly giving her a choice with how he hurried. She snatched at his sleeve as he walked beside her.

Isaiah stopped for a second, hand over her elbow, squeezing briefly.

She frowned at him.

He smiled and walked out.

Great. Just great.

Seline sat down tentatively on the edge of the bed.

"Not gonna say hi?" Matthew grumbled.

She jumped at his raspy voice.

The redhead was on his side again, curled up around his stomach, hand tenderly laid over it. But positioned towards her now. His dark brown eyes were glassy with fever.

"Hi," she squicked.

Matthew glowered at her.

"How- ehm, how are you doing?"

"Staying down for now. Stomach cramping like hell, though."

"Ah, right...uhm, I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for? Not your fault."

She nodded. Not this time, it wasn't. "Can I get you anything?"

"Nah," he sighed, then a quiet burp escaped past his lips. He turned on his back, irritated. "I got one over-motivated nursemaid right over there. He is asking if he can bring me something every two damn minutes."

Seline chuckled at that. "Sounds like him."

"Seriously. We are so filling his need to take care of someone, it's ridiculous."

There was another long pause.

"Did...did you take your temperature?" she asked, looking for something to do.

"Yeah. A little elevated." He gave her a side-look, head turned towards his pillow. "You don't have to stay here if you don't want to. I'm no fun right now."

She bit her lip, smoothing her wavy hair and sliding to her feet, heart hammering. "If you don't want me here, I understand..."

"Huh?" His head jerked up to her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's fine, it's fine, I'm sorry,..."

"Stop with the sorrys- now where do you think you are going?" He lifted himself up, hand towards her, before he swayed and flopped back into the bed with a whine.

"What are you doing, you moron, stay put-" she knelt on the bed next to him anxiously as he rubbed at his eyes again.

"I'm okay. Jst got a'lttle dizzy." Matthew's eyes were shut together and he was grimacing, sweat perling on his forehead and upper lip.

"Little elevated, huh?" she said skeptically, planting a hand to his forehead on impulse. "You are on fire!"

"Ow! Your hand is freaking cold!"

She drew her hand away immediately as if burned, but he caught it on the way, pulling it against his chest.

"You told me to leave," she protested, tugging at her hand helplessly.

"That's just a pharse. I wanted to be polite. You are supposed to say it's no trouble and insist on staying, dummy."

"Since when do you try to be polite?"

"Since you act so jumpy about everything I do!"

"I'm not jumpy, I just don't know what to say. You gotta be angry with me-"

"For what?" He blinked at her in genuine irritated confusion, his eyes somehow bigger and rounder than usual with the fever and redness to his cheeks.

Seline was so shocked at his incomprehension she forgot what she meant to say.

Matthew coughed, leaning his head back, as all the energy from the little spurt flowed out of him. "Now my head hurts too."

"You are probably dehydrated," she said absently, wiggling her fingers.

He opened his hand slightly, releasing her from his hold, squeezing his eyes shut again.

Seline skidded down from the bed, circling around to look through Isaiah's collected supplies. She found a discarded wet towel and poured some water over it from the giant bottle - why was there a bottle and not some kind of basin? - and swiped it over Matthew's forehead. "Just breathe. Relax. It will go away soon. We can try water in a few minutes. I got a real good rehydration solution for you. You will get better quickly."

"Hmmm," Matthew's furrowed brows smoothed over at the feel of the towel. He turned towards her, head tracking her movements. His right hand opened and closed, though he didn't say anything else.

The invitation couldn't have been clearer.

Seline slid her hand inside of his, squeezing his wrist, a warm fluttery feeling washing over her.

***

They ended up all in the bed with Matthew in the middle. Isaiah from one side, upright as always. Seline from the left, legs folded underneath her.

Matthew seemed to be content, stuffed between them like that. He almost didn't toss as he napped.

Sometimes, he landed with his head pressed against Isaiah's leg, sometimes in her lap.

Isaiah gave her an amused smile from time to time, settled at last.

She wasn't sure if she did everything right. But it seemed to be enough for the moment.

@bellysoupset

[thepoetsvortex]

Yeah, you are acting like a fake ass Christian. Sitting here preaching about pro-life. Stop trying to do God's job!! A fetus only has the right to life if God says they have the right to life!!! If a fetus was made from rape aka the devils work why on Earth would God want the mom, who is more than likely underage to be forced to give birth to a devil baby? Unless of course the mom wanted to keep it, then they have a special place in heaven for that strength. But that's the thing, the mom should get to choose! If God doesn't want her to have an abortion he will make it so that she can't get one by other means aka no appointments available or here is a thought any child who is needed from God will be placed in a loving home by parents who want kids. God is about free will and he wouldn't have had the option available if he didn't will it. 😡 plenty of babies died in the flood. Why? Because they were just going to be raised to be sinners anyway so stop worrying about stuff that is ultimately up to God :/ (Talking about early abortions only btw) have a blessed day /srs 💜 also thank you for reading all of that :D

So I wanted to put together a thorough response to this, I think that it deserves to be responded to because to me this represents a large problem with mainstream Christianity nowadays. I'm not apologizing for this being long, because I will take the time to be diligent and say what needs to be said.

Stop trying to do God's job!!

It is God's job to be the ultimate arbiter of justice because only He is really just, and only He is righteous and good. This does not, by any imagining, mean that He does not call His people to care about injustice, because He absolutely does. How many times in the Bible does God instruct His people to care about the defenseless, the poor, the orphan, and the widow? (Deut. 24: 19-22; James 1:27; Galatians 2:10; and soooo many more?) There are entire books of the Bible, including Psalms, Job, Habakkuk, Jeremiah, Isaiah, and Lamentations, to name just a few, who are concerned with God's justice not merely in heaven but the way His people carry out this justice in the world today.

God did not call His people to ignore injustice on this earth because it is His job alone to care about it. He calls His people to act justly. He especially calls us to protect the most vulnerable classes of society- particularly, children. We know how Jesus talks about little children- He loves them, and pronounces a harsh sentence on those who would lead them astray (Matthew 19:14, Matthew 18:6). We are not called to ignore the murder of little children because God is more just than we are. Of course God is more just than we are. That is why we are called to act like Jesus.

A fetus only has the right to life if God says they have the right to life!!!

What does God say about a fetus's right to life?

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart" (Jeremiah 1:5).

"My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be" (Psalm 139: 15-16).

As even Paul notes: "But when God, who set me apart from my mother's womb and called me by His grace..." (Galatians 1:15).

Now, a question. Why would God set us all apart- for indeed, these are not just applicable to major prophets, kings, and apostles, but to each and every one of us- why would that God, not believe that we have a right to life when He already at that early point in time (early for us, not for Him), has every single plan and calling for our lives ALREADY in place even then? Would He truly be fine with the death of someone who He is still has great plans for? Which is true of every child in the womb?

If a fetus was made from rape aka the devils work why on Earth would God want the mom, who is more than likely underage to be forced to give birth to a devil baby

This is sad to me, anon, because it shows me that you do not believe that God is good enough to bring beautiful things out of tragedy and horrific circumstances. The case of a young girl raped is absolutely tragic and horrific, and God will bring justice on her abuser. But He is so good that even in her startling pain, He can still bring good out of that! She is perfectly able to give up the child for adoption if she is not of age or financially or emotionally able to take care of it. It is still very possible for that child to have an enriching, fulfilling life.

In addition, "He will not die for his father's sin; he will surely live. But his father will die for his own sin" (Ezekiel 18:17-18). God does not call on us to punish others for heinous crimes their parents have committed.

Also, it is not a devil baby because the father committed an act of the devil.

Unless of course the mom wanted to keep it, then they have a special place in heaven for that strength

Here you fall into the logical pitfall of many pro-choicers. You see, anon, our value and our worth in God's sight is never determined by whether other people, including our own parents, want us or not. Plenty of His most beloved and cherished servants were rejected by absolutely everyone around them, including their parents and the world at large. They still have worth to God because they are made in His image, and because Jesus died for them. That doesn't change by any human being's rejection of us, whatever their basis for it. Why is it not a devil baby anymore just because it's wanted? If conception in rape makes someone of the devil, then that doesn't change because their mother wants them. Also, plenty of people are conceived in rape who are Godly, loving people and they certainly don't belong to Satan!

The mom should get to choose!

We are all free to choose sin, but this does not mean that we should.

If God doesn't want her to have an abortion he will make it so that she can't get one by other means aka no appointments available or here is a thought any child who is needed from God will be placed in a loving home by parents who want kids

If this were true, no evil things would happen in the world at all because God would prevent them. You say "God is all about free will," but then expect Him to intervene and actually violate free will to go prevent evil. That just isn't how it works. God is against rape, that is very much a sin, but obviously that is a tragedy that still happens in the world. God doesn't take away your ability to do bad things to stop you from doing them.

Also, God doesn't "need" any of us; He wants us! 8 billion people and He still thought the universe was incomplete without you! And without me, and all of our loved ones, and that unborn child conceived in rape as well. I am not comfortable, nor do I have the moral authority to say to anyone conceived in rape that they aren't wanted or valued by God. It would be a lie because they are!

God is about free will and he wouldn't have had the option available if he didn't will it.

This contradicts your previous statement, as I already got into, so I'll just say that God cares about free will, but part of free will is having the ability to choose evil. You can't say "he wouldn't have had the option available" because the option to do evil is ALWAYS available to humans. We are sinful, selfish beings! The option to murder, to exploit, to plunder, to do drugs; the option to do all these sinful things is always available. We still have laws against those things because they go against the moral order. Abortion goes against the moral order, but it is the only issue you argue we shouldn't regulate because it goes against free will and God cares about free will. Well, it is an exercise of free will to murder, but the Ten Commandments still says not to!

Freedom is not the freedom to do whatever we want as people. It is the freedom to do what we ought to do and what is right and just to do. Not to do things which it is unjust to do. "Do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh" (Galatians 5:13). God, and secular law, all regulate things which go "against" bodily autonomy because those things infringe on the rights of others, in the case of abortion, on the baby's right to life. It is only with abortion, though, that you say it shouldn't be regulated because of "free will." Free will is why we need law! We need law to regulate the human propensity to sin! (I highly recommend Federalist 51 for better arguments about this).

plenty of babies died in the flood. Why? Because they were just going to be raised to be sinners anyway so stop worrying about stuff that is ultimately up to God :/

It is up to God to met out justice in the last days. This is not an excuse to turn a blind eye to injustice happening now. In fact, it's the opposite! God will call us all to account for not helping the vulnerable. That includes orphans, and the poor, and the sick, and it also includes unborn children having their most fundamental and sacred right violated. (See Jesus's parable of the sheep and goats in Matthew 25).

Also, we all have the propensity to sin, children born from rape are not unique in that regard. But they also have the ability to choose God! If they are raised in sin, that doesn’t mean you have the right to kill them before they sin and it doesn’t mean they have to be stuck in sin as adults. They can get out. It isn’t hopeless!

God gave those babies life from conception. Why are you playing God by arguing that you have the right to take it away from them?

Christians cannot stay quiet about moral issues because it's up to God. It is up to God, and He very much involves us in His work! I encourage you to speak out against oppression and help those in need you are able, including the most vulnerable among us, the unborn. God gave them life, no matter how, and He loves them as He loves you!

And since you said you are only talking about early abortion, my question is this. When does it become a life? Because both science and the Scriptures say that life begins at conception. There is no arbitrary timeframe in the womb where somebody becomes alive. When an egg is fertilized, it is an entirely unique set of DNA that will never exist again. That doesn't happen several weeks down the line.

Thank you for reading all this anon and I hope you truly have a blessed day as well! You are deeply loved by Christ and I hope you experience His presence today! Please let me know if anything needs clarification or if this made sense. God bless.

[gaamagirl565]

Matters of the heart S2 ep 12

Matters of the heart

Season 2 Episode 12

The alley girl {OPENING CREDITS} {Open to a slow zoom on Varian’s house as thunder rolls in the distance; lightning flashes and we cut to the bedroom where Varian tosses and turns} Varian: ngghh...no… {We see his nightmare; Isaiah falling off the cliff; Cassandra being tortured by her power; Quirin being devoured by a black mist in the shape of a wolf; everything fades to a black void with only Estelle in the room; her back is turned to him}

Varian: E-Estelle? {She turns to him with pink and green eyes and the cut on her neck visible; when she speaks it is Zhan tiri’s voice} Estelle: Is this your happily ever after, child? {Varian jolts up in bed with a shout and wakes Zapada in the process} Zapada: mn? Iubriea mea? {Varian gets up from the bed and pours water from the pitcher into the basin on the dresser} Zapada: Another nightmare? {Varian splashes his face} Varian: Probably for the best...it’s almost dawn and I have to be at the castle… {Zapada gets up and walks over to him; she takes his hand and he looks at her} Zapada: You have barely been sleeping…and it is falling rain outside. Varian: It doesn’t matter...what matters is finding that cult and destroying them. Zapada: Varian how do you expect to do that when you look like death himself? Varian: Zapada, please… Zapada: No! You will catch your demise! Varian: and they are causing people’s demise! They took my friend, destroyed an entire kingdom, killed Estelle, my dad, my son-! Estelle: Who was no less of a son to me than the one within me, Varian!...but very well. If you want to perish before you’ve even obtained victory...then be my guest. {She walks over to the bed and lies down} Varian:...fine. {He leaves and shuts the door; Zapada’s eyes water and she quietly cries into her pillow; Cut to the morning in the Dark Kingdom; Isaiah rolls over in his cave with a groan} Isaiah:...ugh...I can’t wait to have my bed back… {A distant scream rings out in the forest and Isaiah jolts up} Girls voice: NOT AGAIN! AHHHHH!! Isaiah: H-Hang on! I’m coming! {Isaiah runs through the trees and hops over rocks; he rushes as fast as he can and arrives at a clearing; cautiously he steps forward} Isaiah:...hello? Girls voice: Up here you pillock... {Isaiah looks up to see a young girl hanging from a tree branch by her foot} Isaiah:......*snerk* Girl: Snicker one more time and it’ll cost your tongue. Isaiah: heh...sorry, here let me help you dow- Girl: no I got it… {She takes out a shiv and starts cutting the rope} Isaiah: If you have everything under control why did you scream? Girl:  you ever heard of frustration?  also, I was yanked up into a tree anyone would scream! Isaiah: I-... I can't argue with that… {she cuts through the rope and starts falling} Girl: AH! {Isaiah lunges and catches her} Girl: Hmph! Get off me! Stinky boy! {She gets up and fixes the bandana on her head} Isaiah: Soooo...i’m Isaiah! {He puts out a hand and she stares at it for a moment before going to pick up her bag} Isaiah:....ookkkaaayy… Girl:...Verbena. Isaiah: huh? Verbena: my name is Verbena. Isaiah: O-oh! Okay! Cool! So what’cha doing out here? Verbena: Foraging. Isaiah: oh..cool..yup…… {She stares at him and then groans} Verbena: ...if your coming along, keep up and shut up. Isaiah: R-right! Got it! {he runs up and stays next to her} Isaiah:...so what are we foraging? Verbena: ugghh… {Cut to Catalina walking down into the dungeon; she looks disturbed and angry; she stands in front of Noremoths cell}Catalina: I’d like to talk to the prisoner in this cell, please. Pete:...you’re sure? Catalina: just open the door… {Pete goes over and unlocks the door; Catalina walks in and bares her fangs in a growl; Noremoth looks up} Noremoth: Catalina! {She slams the door closed} Noremoth: Cat I can explain! Catalina: Oh I’m all ears! But lets review! You lied to me, you’re part of a dangerous cult, you killed people, and you attacked Corona multiple times. Did I miss anything? Noremoth: nope that’s uh...pretty much it. {She throws her hands up and walks to the other side of the cell} Noremoth: ...I never meant to hurt you. Catalina: No you only meant to lie, kill, and steal. Noremoth: Technically I never lied- {She gets close to his face, baring her fangs and eyes turning red} Noremoth: BAH! Okay! Okay! Relax! Catalina: You don’t get it do you!? Noremoth: What!? Catalina: I trusted you! I..I liked you! And you betrayed me! You hurt my friends! You hurt my kingdom! And I hate you for it! I honestly wish I had the strength to end you I would gladly tear your throat out for my friend and family! Noremoth: Cat… {Catalina shakes her head and runs out of the cell and slams the door} Noremoth:...smooth ol’ boy...smooth. {Fade to the cult HQ; Larkspur sits in her room with messy hair and a disheveled appearance; she takes a knife and throws it at a Coronian flag she has on her wall; a knock sounds at her door} Vergus: Mistress? {She tumbles out of her bed and fixes herself} Larkspur: C-Come in! Vergus: Mistress,  we were badly battered from the recent battle.  we have many wounded and we're running out of supplies. Larkspur:  and our vessel? Vergus:   despite the doubtless psychological harm that she suffered she appears to be in good health. Larkspur: That is all you needed to say I really don't give a rat's arse about her “psychological harm” Vergus:  regardless mistress, we must obtain more supplies.  the dark kingdom has a trade port. it's about two days’ time from our hideaway. Larkspur:  then what are you still doing here? get together a small group of those that aren't wounded and go obtain things to replenish our supply. Vergus:  well there's one more thing mistress. Larkspur: of course there is. Vergus:  we wish to know what you plan to do now. Noremoth has been captured.  and he didn't exactly leave on the best terms.  he's a serious threat and could easily be giving away information.  we wish to know your orders. Larkspur: hmm.. well it is true he could be a threat.  but we can't just go barreling into Corona.  as you said before we're all wounded and need time to heal,  on top of everything we're low on supplies.  I suppose we should plan for a battle then. if we don't attack they surely will attack us. looks like this little war is at a standstill. Vergus: Mistress? Larkspur:  take a small group of the members that aren't wounded.  go to the dark Kingdom, obtain the supplies that we require,  but also try and recruit some new members. look for the lowlifes of the town.  people who are desperate, weak of heart, there should be plenty.  if we're going to fight a battle in the future we should have more able-bodied men and women. Vergus: Yes mistress. Larkspur:  and Vergus? don't disappoint me. {cut to Verbena walking into the kingdom gates with Isaiah in tow} Verbena: So let me get this straight.  you got separated from your family and you're here for at least another week until you can find enough reserves for a four day trip on foot back to Corona. Isaiah: That pretty much sums it up yeah… Verbena:  well you're doomed. Isaiah: Wait wha-Verbena! Benny! May I call you Benny? Verbena: no. Isaiah: Benny,  what do you mean I'm doomed!? Verbena:  look I've been surviving on these streets by myself for 2 years.  I have survived starvation, infection, and almost dying of exposure.  I’m a big girl and I can tell just by looking at you, you wouldn't last a day. Isaiah: oh ho really? How so? Verbena:  do I really have to explain?  from what you've been telling me you relied too heavily on the grown-ups around you. you can't do that when you're living on the streets. a street kid has seen no lesser than a rat.  you have to do what you can to survive which means doing things that you aren’t gonna be happy with. Isaiah:  how old are you? Six?  who hurt you? Verbena: actually I'm this many! *holds up fingers*  7 almost 8. my parents died in a house fire. I’ve been living on my own ever since. Isaiah:  why don't you just go to an orphanage? {She grabs his face and pulls him down} Verbena: I WILL NEVER EVER GO TO THAT MEAN PLACE! Isaiah: Okay! Okay! Geez! {she lets go and starts walking before they both hear a grumble; she turns and looks at him} Verbena:  are you kidding me? when was the last time you ate? Isaiah:... on the ship. Verbena: ugghh.. helpless utterly helpless.  come on stinky let's find you something to eat. {Fade to Lily looking out a window from the seat in her room; she sniffles and wipes a tear before a knock is at her door} Cyrus: Lily? It’s me!...it’s all of us really. {Eddard opens the door} Cyrus: Wow rude...she didn’t express we could come in! Eddard: Lily? You okay sis?{Her sister Rosie sits by her} Rosie: Your handmaiden said that you've been turning away all sorts of food even your favorite. Cyrus:  you love lemon meringue pie. Lily:  I just don't feel it… {They all look at each other concerned; Eugene walks in} Eugene: don’t worry guys...I got this. All: Dad! Eugene:  if you guys could give us the room I think your sister needs some one-on-one with her awesome dad. Cyrus: Yes father. {all but Eddard walk out of the room before Cyrus goes back and pulls him out} Eugene: Lily?...sweetheart you can’t keep doing this.  I know it hurts but- Lily:  no you don't know! You can’t possibly know! {Eugene jumps} Lily:  I should have gone with you. Eugene:  no.  that would have been ten times worse.  you could have been killed then. Lily:  maybe then I could have stopped them from killing my best for him. Eugene: there was nothing we could have done.  Lily none of this was your fault. none of this was anyone's fault. it wasn't supposed to happen this way. Lily: I liked ‘saiah… Eugene: I know princess… Lily: no I...I like liked him… Eugene: wait, you...OH...ohh… {Lily sobs} Eugene: oh princess c’mere… {Eugene picks her up and holds her in his lap; she snuggles into his chest} Eugene: It’s gonna be okay..it may not seem like it now but..it..it will...it will {he holds her tighter as it zooms out on them; cut to Varian tiredly exiting his Lab in the castle; he walks a bit before stopping and look up at the giant door he’s passing by; Zapada’s words from that morning ring in his head; he sets his stuff down} Varian:...Herz Der Sonne’s journal. {He looks around before he places a hand on the door} Varian:...I must be outta my damn mind. {Varian opens the door to the room and walks up to the journal; he sighs} Varian: I can’t believe I’m doing this… {He opens the book and flips through it; he stops at a page and stares at it before running his hand over it: he sighs} Varian: ….I really screwed up, huh?  failed to protect you...failed to protect our son.  Seems just yesterday we were here. {He smiles sadly and scoffs} Varian:  I really was still a stupid kid wasn't I?   thinking all of our problems would be solved because we signed a stupid book. {Fade to a flashback of him and Estelle sneaking in the room; Estelle runs over to the journal as Varian closes the door} Estelle:  has anyone seen us? Varian: not from what I've seen. Estelle: Good.  in my opinion, this has to be a private affair. Varian: indeed your grace. Estelle:  Ew don’t call me that. {they chuckle and Estelle opens the journal to a blank page; She then takes a quill but hesitates} Varian: …Estelle? You okay? Estelle: Oh! Y-Yes! Right as rain! Varian: we don't have to do this if you don't want to... I'm not going to hold it against you. Estelle:  no!  I want to do this. the last journal existed for hundreds of years.  I don't want there to only be a record of me being tied to that... Pompous duke!. Varian: won’t people find out? Estelle:  nobody goes back and looks at the other Pages until it's been decades maybe more.  please...Varian. I want to share a page with the man I love. The man I choose. {Varian looks stunned for a second but then his face softens; He takes a Quill and both sign the journal; Estelle kisses him; they stay in each other’s arms} Estelle: Well...it seems to be official now. Varian: yeah… Estelle: for better or for worse… Varian: No matter what happens… {Fade out and cut to the page with their names on it; a tear drips on the page; Varian sniffles and wipes his eyes before staring blankly at the page; with a cold stare he tears the page from the journal and stuffs it in his vest; cut to him walking out of the room and stopping to lean against the wall} Rapunzel: Varian! There you are! We’ve all been looking for you! Varian: for me? How can I help Rapunzel? Rapunzel:....you’re...not gonna like it. {Lance walks forward with a drink bottle} Varian: What is this? Eugene: a drink to share with Noremoth. Varian: ...Excuse me!? Rapunzel: Now Varian, please… Varian: No Hold up! You want me to share a drink with the man that murdered my family!? Eugene: Varian I know your upset with him but- Varian: Upset? you think i’m just UPSET with that man!? i’m 1000x more than that, Eugene! Rapunzel: okay enough! Both of you! Varian, We need information from him. from what we've heard him say he seems to be innocent of most of the crimes here. Varian: what!? Rapunzel:  from what he's been telling us it was mostly Larkspur giving the orders.  Quirin's death was an accident according to him,  he didn't know that Estelle was going to be the first target,  and Isaiah fell off the cliffs when Noremoth wasn't anywhere near him. It's the only information he was willing to give us. Lance:  he just keeps asking us to kill him and be done with it. Keira: and why don't we!?  okay so my Quirin's death was an accident but that means he still tried to kill Varian! And look at Catalina! Rapunzel:  I promise you, there will be consequences for him but right now his information is invaluable. If we're going to avenge Isaiah and anyone else that was killed at the cults hand we’re going to need his help. {Varian eyes the bottle before walking off with it} Catalina: Varian just...just don’t hurt him too bad… Varian:...no promises. {Cut to Isaiah in the marketplace of the dark kingdom} Isaiah: geez... bread here is so expensive. Verbena:  that's cause wheat doesn't do well here so we have to im-..im… Isaiah: ...Import? Verbena: yeah! import it from other kingdoms. Isaiah: seriously how are you alive? Verbena: I guess i’m just smarter than you. Isaiah: you little- Verbena: shh!...look! Isaiah: what? {She points to a small bag of moldy bread} Verbena: It's all we got. Isaiah: how are we going to the new convince him to sell us- {Verbena rushes in and grabs it before taking off} Baker: STOP! THIEF! Isaiah: BENNY!? Verbena: Lets go! {they both run through the street weaving around people as the baker chases them; At one point Benny trips and picks up as much of the bread as she can; The baker goes to grab her but Isaiah picks up an apple from a cart and throws it, hitting him in the nose} Baker: Filthy street pest! You broke my nose! Augh! {Isaiah runs up to her and pulls her into the alleyway} Verbena:...well...that could’ve gone better. Isaiah: Yeah i’ll say! What in the hell was any of that!? Verbena: I was getting us food! Isaiah: By stealing it!? I have coin! I could have bought food! Verbena: if I knew that I would have let you but like I said before, You gots to do things you don't like! Isaiah: Screw that!  I've never once even considered stealing food! if need be I would have gone to the forest and searched for food or dug in a trash can! I never would have stolen from anyone! now look what I did I broke some poor man's nose for you! Verbena:  and because of that we have dinner.  when it comes to survival sometimes you gotta be bad. Isaiah:  I would rather risk everything than hurt someone again! Verbena:...Again? {Isaiah jumps at his own words and gently touches his scar; Verbena sighs and hands him a stale roll of bread from the bag} Verbena:  ...here... just eat it. {Isaiah swipes the roll and takes a bite; Verbena grabs her own roll and picks the mold off before eating; she hears sniffles and looks over to see Isaiah wiping his eyes as he eats} Verbena:...why me? {She walks over and plops down by him eating her bread; Isaiah looks over to her leaning on him} Verbena:...sorry... {he smiles and leans on her as they eat; cut to Varian outside Noremoths door at night; Pete unlocks it for him and he walks in} Noremoth: Well.. this is a surprise.

Varian: be quiet… Noremoth:  did you really just walk in here just to tell me to shut up? Varian: and if I did? Noremoth: well not like I can do anything except call you a massive jerk. Varian: you see there's a lot of irony in the idea of you calling me a massive jerk. Noremoth:  whatever... what's that? Varian:  this? {he holds up the bottle} Noremoth:  no the Dancing Cockatoo on your head.. yes the bottle! Varian: thought you could use a drink. I can't imagine the water down here is very sanitary. Noremoth: What is it? Varian: I have absolutely no clue but all I know is it doesn't smell very good. Noremoth: then it is my kind of speed. {Varian pours two glasses and goes to hand him one} Varian: oh...wait… Noremoth: Yes Varian... I'll just levitate the glass with my unicorn powers. Varian: oh shut up… {He goes to unlock his wrists; Noremoth rubs them; Varian hands him the drink and he sits down on the ground with him} Varian: well this brings back memories. Noremoth:  drinking in a Cell brings back memories? Varian: the cell itself dingus...  I forget...it's been what.. 18..19 years… Noremoth:  yes I've heard your story.  I believe we only met after the death of Zhan tiri.  you went traveling right? Varian:  I was gifted the title of Royal engineer. but I needed a break from Corona after everything that happened.  I decided to go on a scientific Expedition.  I wanted to learn how the Sun Drop , the Moonstone, and the black rocks had affected other kingdoms.  I also wanted to learn more about me and see if there was a more scientific explanation for all of it. perhaps a new branch of science that we hadn't even discovered yet. Noremoth:  and then we came in and screwed everything up didn't we? {Noremoth smirks and sips his drink} Varian:  you can say that again. instead of a scientific expedition, I found myself trying to thwart you guys every time I entered a new kingdom. Noremoth:  we were very diverse with our recruiting.  Misfits of all the Seven Kingdoms joining together to create a new world order with help from the power of Zhan tiri and a vessel hosting the magic for us. Varian:... why Cassandra? Noremoth:... that was larkspur's doing. I grew up in Corona. I was here for that great battle. Varian:...What? I didn't see you at all. Noremoth: I don't know where I was born but I do know I grew up in an orphanage not too far from Corona.  orphanages paint such a pretty picture.  oh we care for orphaned so therefore we're Saints! puh!... I left the orphanage when I was 12 I couldn't stand it anymore and then I was a street child in Corona.  therefore I was useless.  I was here for everything. Varian: Everything? Noremoth:  yes... everything. how did you make your raccoon that size? Varian:  Okay moving on!  you never answered my question. Noremoth:  right... I told her about how Cassandra was the wielder of the Moonstone and how I saw her come into Corona many times.  I even told her about the time she practically destroyed the whole Kingdom with black rocks.  Larkspur insisted that that was who we had to have his The Vessel. I don't know why but I think it's because she thought she can handle it. Varian:  so why did you join the cult? Noremoth: I left Corona once I was old enough same as you. I met t Larkspur and she told me her ideas. I was sick of being treated differently for things that I couldn't control.  people assuming that I was filthy, uneducated, and just overall waste of space because I was an orphan Street child.  I want to spare future generations of that that's why I joined.  I've always had a code. never hurt women or children. Varian: BUT- Noremoth:  I was never near your son when he fell and that wasn't supposed to happen.  I didn't know that Cassandra’s first kill was Isaiah’s mother.  as for your father... I want you to know that I gave Larkspur hell for that.  I'm sorry. I tried to do good things for the world by joining this cult but it seems that I've only brought misery. I’m...truly sorry about that. {Noremoth picks up his cup; Varian watches him with a despondent look} Noremoth: ...Salut 

Varian:......Salut. {They clink glasses and both take a sip before Varian coughs and sputters and Noremoth laughs; fade to Isaiah leaning against a barrel in the alley asleep; Verbena walks over and kicks him} Isaiah: OW! Hey, what the- Verbena: Sh! C’mon! I gots to show you something! {Isaiah rolls his eyes and follows; she leads him out into the dark barren street} Isaiah: ...Okay, I'm out here now what? Verbena:  any second now… {They stand for a minute or two; Isaiah goes to say something to her but then notices a glow; He looks up to see colours dancing in the sky} Isaiah: Whoa... aurora borealis… Verbena: what? Isaiah:  Aurora Borealis is also known as the Northern Lights I read about it in my books back home.  I didn't know the dark Kingdom had such a cool view of it. Verbena:  I overheard some grown-up say that the lights only started appearing after the black rocks disappeared. that was way before I was born. Isaiah: and how old do you think I am? that's before I was born to! Verbena:  you're old and stinky! {Isaiah smirks and tickles her; she squeals and giggles} Isaiah: Oh am I!? I’m old and stinky? Well, you’re tiny and spiteful! {she squeals and giggles; Isaiah smiles and looks up at the sky with a sad smile} Verbena: do you miss your family? {Isaiah turns to look at her} Verbena:  I miss mine too. I miss my mommy. Isaiah:...me too squirt...me too.

[pureblood-prey]

The End

Soooo as y’all can tell, this blog is kinda dead. I still enjoy thinking of new content for my OCs but I have literally zero motivation to post anything anymore. I really wanted to stay because of all my friends, which is why I won’t be deleting the blog, it’s just gonna officially gonna be put to an end. 

Don’t worry about my OCs though, I’ve talked with Lind whom is in charge of first blood moon with her OC Kris Dreumoore, and we’ve decided that Spencer and her OC Oliver (Spencer’s long term boyfriend) will be moving away together to travel and such~ also probably married lol. She gave me permission to talk about this, it’s just since both of our blogs are dead, we didn’t want our boys to break up so we decided this happy ending for them 

As for Isabella and Isaiah, I don’t wanna say too much about Leon’s and Kanaye’s story because that’s not my place, but just know that both couples enjoy their time together and live on very happy lives with each other and families. 

That’s kinda it, there will probably be one last writing that I’ll do about Yuko and Rika because there’s a biiiig part in their storyline that i feel I should tell you guys so look out for that final post

Thank you all for sticking with me :)

[team-adults-blog]

5.04 Pandora’s Box

Appropriately titled seeing as the bunker is opened and all hell breaks loose! Broken into sections based on characters. Mainly Kabby tbh. At least two song references. Possibly other pop-culture references... I guess you’ll have to read to find out...

Kabby

Omg Dad!Kane what is happening??? Octavia I know you care what are you doing. OFC he grabs a shield. Abby is locked up? That’s where she is! AHHH! I was right of course he’s taking the fall for Abby. NATE. JACKSON. What is the plan??? INDRA? Save my guy! I mean I know he will live but the suspense and HEY HE IS GETTING HURT while I wait for you to rescue him. OH SHIT. He did not need saving mamaaaaa I just killed a maaaannnn He clearly didn’t want to do that. More shaky hands and “what have I done face” it’s ok bby I know you feel remorse and you will be forgiven.

What the hell Octavia? He fights again??? Get out. Uggghhhhhh this is torture let him live! Ok. If I take a step back, he’s fighting again because he hesitated and showed weakness. The crowd wants a strong winner. Got it. Doesn’t make me like it, but that’s how this system is running now. Mob mentality. Human beings in a mob… What’s a mob to a (red queen) what’s a (queen) to a god? What’s a god to a nonbeliever? Who don’t believe in anything? We make it out alive. Alright, alright, no church in the wild. You know I went a little further with that song than I intended, but it works because the era of commanders and the flame is over, Gaia didn’t like that, but she understands symbols and Octavia covered in blood is a strong symbol, I’ll give her that. She knows he didn’t do it. But it’s about appeasing the mob. Kane’s reply “we’re all guilty” FUCK ‘EM UP BRO! WE SO ARE. We so are. And then Octavia’s all eyeroll-y and not here for a philosophy lesson. I loved that exchange. Dad!Kane gets super philosophical with it and she doesn’t want to hear it so often. Is Indra going to help him? KINDRA FOREVER. No, she’s going to go talk to Abby. She is so smart. Indra is the best. Make her main. Jaha is dead. Isaiah is gone. You can pay Ms. Porter more okayyyyyyy. She’s been crushing her scenes. I’ve been saying this for years.

Back to Abby. How did no one catch the addiction six years ago? It was clearly an issue at day 46, so I’m surprised Jackson didn’t intervene sooner? Or maybe he did. But addiction is not easy and can drive people to do desperate things, like stealing medicine. Thank the lord Kabby gets another pre-death hug. Why is this a reoccurring thing? He’s going to live. I am not worried. Maybe if this was the end of the season or if Jaha hadn’t just died I’d be a little more worried.

Oh man. I said I wasn’t worried, but I’m a little scared. My boy is taking some serious injuries as he plays the Jesus card yet again. Octavia no! don’t hurt him! Of COURSE I was right. Just when he’s about to die the bunker opens and our man Bellamy comes in all spy-kids/ navy seals- pick the reference you prefer (also whats-her-face-main-woman was a SEAL soooo this is a reference AND the truth). Oh and here’s Clarke too. Bellarke is like. Shit. What blood pit did we drop into?

AND THEN KINDRA BFFS! I feel like Indra is always saving Kane? Kane has defended her, but she’s straight up saved his life at least twice in my immediate memory: When he was chipped in polis and she tackled him (and his poofy hair was wiiiillllldddddd) and here again when she gets him out of the bunker while Octavia isn’t looking. And then Clarke gets to hug mom and Kane again and I love it. Literally Clarke and Abby can’t be together for more than a few hours on this show. They were separated for SIX years. Then they get, what, two conversations, the second is her telling them to run! And then Abby comes back and makes sure Kane goes back to space with her (nice) but has to leave Clarke again. Jason, if this is the most important relationship on the show, please let them have a day or a week together.

Raven and Shaw I ship ittttttttttttt. Shaw’s already developing a crush and he hasn’t seen the beauty that is Raven Reyes. Good luck bro. OH! But he fell in love with her mind first. Aw this is great I like this. Please don’t ruin this for me. Murphy and Raven scenes were nice. Love Raven talking to Clarke on the radio. And then Murphy asks why Raven always has to be the one to sacrifice? Love him. What a hero move. I’m glad he gets to play the hero again for his sake, even if he should learn over this season that he has value in just being him. He got Raven to have some fun and kick around a soccer ball. He has value just for doing that.

Bellarke

Bellamy learning diplomacy. He’s come so far. And then we get a great Bellarke hug. It really was a sweet and pure moment and I don’t even care that Clarke didn’t get all the details she would normally want. Happy happy.

Major take-aways:

-Marcus Kane is a sacrificial angel, but he also has military training and can defend himself and kill a dude if he has to. But he doesn’t like it. Especially when it’s personal aka hand-to-hand combat and not with the distance of guns. He does it for Abby. And that’s why I love him. Also he is beautiful, inside and out. He has been blessed.

-Octavia has changed. That’s going to take some getting used to for Bellamy and the viewers.

-Shaw is the only “nice” guy, but is he really nice? He’s still following orders and appears to have betrayed the crew to help the prisoners take over the ship. But he’s got a moral compass, he’s just not living to it the way he wants to. That may change- he’s in survival mode right now with guns pointed at his head anytime he objects. I’m curious as to what made him rebel to get to where he is now. I’m also excited for Shaw to meet Raven. She doesn’t need a love interest, but *I* am a little interested in what that would look like. She could pull an Abby and help bring out the better man inside that’s hiding behind rules and following orders.

-Bellarke is hiz hop happening.

-Uh so everyone else from space squad is hiding in the woods with Maddi?  I’d like to know what they’re talking about there- catching each other up and sharing stories. What stories did Clarke tell and leave out? Is Maddi going to ask Marper about how long Bell and Clarke have had heart eyes for each other? I wouldn’t mind seeing that. At the same time, I do understand that it is not exactly crucial to the plot; the idea is that they are safe. Not sure I need to see that, but it’d be cool.

-SO FAR THIS SEASON IS GREAT AND I LOVE THAT I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS THAT I CAN’T QUITE FIGURE OUT YET- like what is the sickness Abby needs to cure? Is it some toxicity from the minerals they were mining? That’s the only guess I’ve got and I am A-OK not having it figured out yet.

-I am worried Marcus going to space is a bad idea because he will be used as leverage to get Abby to do things she doesn’t want to do. No doubt there.  But I’m ok with that because everything is ethically grey andddddd it means Kabby will have scenes together. AND they’ll be flipped from last season where Abby was just hanging out in Polis for a bit to be Ambassador Kane’s partner. Now Kane gets to be the Doc’s partner. He’ll probably still get a role because he’s a good diplomat and all that. But I like the idea of Abby having the major role to play and Kane hanging out as a love interest. Because GENDER NORMS. And Kabby talks and cuddles.

-When will Monty and Miller be reunited? And Miller and Harper were buds all the way back when they were locked up on the ark. I love reunionssssssss

[aceofstars16]

Tagged!

I was tagged by @gods-little-punk and someone else (I forgot to save the post to see who) to do a get to know you tag, but I already answered here, so I thought I’d just let them know that! (thanks for the tag! I always love tags ^^ The only answer that has changed from that tag is that now my hair is short xD)

I was also tagged by @friendlywildflowers, @sgcfcjohnpreston782 , and@shenzi-hemlock (they asked me different questions so I’ll be answering t three sets of questions, flowers tagged me forever ago but I kept forgetting to work on it xD)

Rules: Always post the rules Answer the questions given to you Write 11 questions of your own Tag 11 people 

@friendlywildflowers questions:

1. Would you rather sing well and not be able to play any instruments or play all instruments beautifully but have a horrible singing voice?

Ohh that’s hard...I might go with singing because I love singing, but it can also make my throat feel tight *shakes fist at VCD* so maybe instruments would be more fun, especially if I could play any instrument...

2. Oh no! You’ve been injured and one of your limbs must go lol sorry. Which limb would you give up? Why?

Oh gosh...maybe my left arm? Cause I could still write and draw? Or a leg...I really don’t know I don’t want to lose a limb haha xD

3. You have the chance to make 1 thing come alive. What/Who would it be? (And by that, I mean fictional/inanimate things/people. Dead people don’t count.)

Ohhh...oh that’s hard...I’m tempted to say Peter Parker cause honestly that would just be fun...or just any character I want to hug? There are soo many though! *flops* (I want give Lance a hug though...like he needs it poor bby!)

4. If you had to live in a museum for 2 months, which museum would you pick?

Oh goodness...I’ve never been a HUGE fan of museums so I really don’t know...maybe the Natural History Museum, I could just pretend I’m in Night at the Museum haha xD

5. You’re forced to steal a painting. Which one would you steal, and why? (Bonus: Also, how would you steal it?)

Ummm, gosh I don’t know...Starry Night maybe? I’ve always loved that one...I would use my “make one fictional character real” card and make Neal Caffery real and ask him to steal it for me...xD

6. What food would you eat if you had to eat only that for a year?

Can I go with the salad option and like have fruit salad and regular salad and like anything I can call a ‘salad’ cause I’d do that...or chicken maybe but I would get tired of only chicken so....salad...xD

7. Oh look, the world is being attacked by a super villain and you must save everyone! Who is in your squad and what superpowers do y’all have?

Oh I’m thinking this is like, people I know and not fictional characters? I’m legit blanking on fun creative things so much right now tbh...I don’t even know if I can narrow down all of my friends into just one squad??? *flops*

8. Your pet (any one) turned as huge as Clifford (and if you don’t have a pet, imagine you do). Now what?

I snuggle with them and pet them and enjoy having a huge fluffy cat xD

9. You come home one night and your parents tell you you’re adopted. What’s the first thing you do?

Probably ask about my real parents....though I might be kind of shocked...no I’d be really shocked and confused.

10. What would you describe as “the perfect day”?

Hmm, no stomach or headaches, just feelings good, going out, maybe hanging out with friends, seeing a movie or trying out a fun restaurant or activity, and then when we get home, watch a movie and make cookies and stay up late talking and laughing.

11. Favorite quote you’ve written yourself?

*looks at the list of word documents of fics and thinks of my long drafts of stories* I....I have no clue and it would take me hours to scour through them to look for something...like I’ve looked at a few things but none of the scream favorite or “I love this!” Like I like some quotes but it’s mainly just fluff things so...I don’t know xD

@sgcfcjohnpreston782‘s questions:

1. How is God working in your life right now?

Patience and trusting in Him, it’s been a continual thing for a while now, but yeah, I have a lot of worries about my life and future so just trusting God in that.

2. Which book(s) of the Bible are you reading?

2 Chronicles in the morning and Isaiah at night. Also trying to read John and Psalms with a friend but I’ve kind of fallen behind on that *flops* 

3. Last thing that made you laugh?

Probably White Collar or Homecoming xD

4. Twenty-six is 20% of what number?

...my math brain is asleep right now...and percentages are my weakness...come back to me later on this...xD

5. How long have you known your oldest friend?

21 years, my sister is my best and oldest friend and I’ve known her my whole life haha xD

6. What talent do you lack, but wish you had?

Not sure if it’s a talent, but giving myself motivation for fun things and school...also being able to learn other languages cause I’m bad at it *flops*

7. Best version of Spider-Man?

*looks at my icon and the answer to #3* This boi! 

To be fair, I don’t dislike any other version of Spider-Man, I’ve liked pretty much every version I’ve seen (I haven’t seen all of them - aka all TV shows/comics- but the ones I have seen I really like!) but I LOVE Tom’s Peter soooo much!

8. Favorite type of cookie?

Give me a good chocolate chip cookie any day

9. Current obsession?

Marvel mainly...also kind of getting into White Collar again, and Rebels cause Season 4 is coming and I’m NOT READY

10. Do you have any nervous ticks?

I kind of like try to make myself small when I’m out, like I’ll hold my purse close and hold my water bottle like I’m ready to swing it as a weapon....pfft xD Also sometimes I’ll fiddle with things or clench up when I’m really nervous

11. How would you describe yourself if you were the main character of an adventure novel?

Oh...hmm...

Ace didn’t seem like much of a hero, and if you asked her if she was one she’d just kind of shrug and say, “Depends on your definition of hero I guess.” Most days she stays home, scrolling online, chatting with friends, trying not to stress too much about the future. But despite her semi-normal life, she has a love for stories. Running outside she pretends she is her favorite character, jumping around saving lives, interacting with made up worlds. Some people might think its silly, but to her its a blast. 

@shenzi-hemlock‘s questions

1. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop?

Nope, my dad did when I was in the car once though. But that was just because he was stressed trying to find a place for me to go to the bathroom (we were on a road trip) and I think he turned too fast or something?

2. Best compliment you have received?

Off the top of my head, I remember a comment I had on a fic saying someone was rewatching the episode my fics had been based off of and they thought scenes where missing because they rememberd my fics and thought they were actually part of the show!

3. What is your perfect pizza?

Hmm, I don’t know, I like trying new things, but I mean, I like veggie pizza, and chicken barbecue pizza and...lots of other pizzas so???

4. Do you feel that children should be sheltered from unhappiness?

My first thought is no, and in a sense, yeah I agree. But I also know you can’t be happy all the time and you shouldn’t spoil kids either, so...a good balance of making sure they are okay and safe, but not always giving them everything they want just to keep them happy. 

5. Have you ever eaten a crayon or glue?

I don’t think so xD

6. What cheers you up?

Chatting with friends, hugs, watching a show/movie I love, sometimes writing or drawing, happy music, going outside and soaking up the sun, snuggling with my cats.

7. Do you enjoy reading and if so what is your favorite book?

Usually...not always, it’s been hard for me to get excited to read recently. I can’t pick just one favorite book...I love a lot? The Lunar Chronicles is great though, and Percy Jackson, Rangers Apprentice, Harry Potter...I like series xD

8. Do you have anyone you go to for advice? If so, are they in person or online?

Usually my sister, sometimes maybe Lynna ( @fair-and-finn online)

9. Which do you use more often, a dictionary or a thesaurus?

Honestly...I use both...when I don’t know what something means or I’m writing and need a better word...I always just look it up online though, so not an actual physical book xD

10. Are you still learning who you are?

Hmm, yeah

11. What dead person would you least want to be haunted by?

So someone I don’t want to be haunted by? I...I don’t know...I tend to think of fictional characters so...??? xD

My Questions:

1. If you could enter one movie, what movie would you enter and why? 

2. If someone paid for a quality cosplay for you (with all the bells and whistles, so you actually feel like that character), who would you want to cosplay?

3. Goldfish or Cheeze-Its?

4. Favorite type of taco?

5. What fictional character would you want to be your best friend?

6.  Favorite tumblr meme?

7. Favorite type of relationship in fiction (romantic, brotp, familial, etc.)?

8. Do you like Nutella? If so, what’s your favorite way to eat it?

9. Your go-to movie for when you feel down? Or a movie you can watch over and over again and love it every time?

10. Do you binge watch Youtube? If so, what do you usually end up watching?

11. If you could meet any actor/actress, who would you pick?

I’ll tag... @hiccup-is-left-handed, @littleaussiecupcake, @throwaninkpot, @forever-painting-roses, @jupiterlandings, @wise-lizard, @ikos-evil-twin, @mintylovesbarryallen, @meldy-arts, @starry-writes, and @book-and-comic-fangirl (bonus: @gaybrielreyyes if you want to do it! ^^)

[queenmabscherzo]

I try to imagine at what point Steve decides to retire ? Is Bucky constantly massaging his knees and sore joints ? They always make sure a pack of icy hot on the grocery list ? Have the heating pad handy in the bed stand drawer ? Steve is so stubborn. Just another season Buck ! But Bucky is the voice of reason and says he deserves some more quality time with those lethal hips before Steve throws them old timer ?? Idk give me aging sappy men headcanons pls !!

OH MY GOD I’M SO SORRY I FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS SOONER!!!! i just loved it so much and kept putting it off bc i wanted to take time to give a good answer :’) :’)

at the end of holiday spirit ... that’s when steve thinks about retiring. he’s been in the NFL for 15 years, so like, that’s already HOF status

he’s body’s finally feeling it, you know? his elbow has probably been bugging him for a couple years. maybe had a surgery or two.

imagine if you will: the time steve breaks his leg during a game ... and someone on the team staff calls bucky .... oh my god ... that’s prob the only time bucky would straight up walk right out of an ASU practice and book it back to chicago to see steve

he would be sooo worried and also so heated and so nosy with the trainers!!!! and steve is like ‘buck lmao let them do their job’

broken bones aren’t a career-threatening, but they require patience and time .... lol steve would be sooooo frustrated on the sidelines

‘they said i need to wait two more weeks, but i’m feeling great buck, i’m thinking next sunday--’ ‘don’t you dare’

but anyway after 15 years, steve is moving slower. bucky tries to teach him some good, easy yoga poses that will stretch his back and loosen his hips, but steve is soooo stiff all the time

we know when bucky has bad days/migraines/etc, steve curls around him in bed and holds an ice pack to his neck and strokes his hair

when steve has bad days, it’s probably in the knees and the throwing arm. bucky would sit behind him on the couch and give deep massages, really digging into steves right shoulder

or they’ll sit in a steaming hot bathtub together, facing each other, so bucky can give him long, soapy foot rubs

anon, you are a genius i literally cannot top “i deserve some more quality time with these hips before you throw them old timer!” I’M CRYING I ‘M LAUGHING SO HARD

(”oh ya, i’ll show you quality time”)

also lbr steve is the last one holding out. bucky was obv the first to retire, then rhodey i presume, then isaiah (bc running backs never last that long), then sam (same goes for WRs), and a ton of Steve’s NFL teammates. so like ..... everything’s changing around him

i’m not sure what would put him over the edge....?

maybe it’s just a build up of everything around him. nick fury retiring and alex moving away? those are huge life changes.

he finishes the season when he’s 37, and before the next season starts, he prob announces that he’s going to retire. i can totally see him doing the kobe diva thing, where every stadium he visits gives him gifts and makes a Huge Deal out of it like “this is the last time Steve Rogers will play in the Superdome!” and other hilarious wonderful nice things.

and man. AFTER he retires? just imagine what he does with those hips and endless free time. bucky won’t be able to deal

[survivorandalucia]

“Wokest Bitch of the West”- Petra

I'm fucking quitting why did you have to cast these fucking people

OMG I made it and it's started and I'm soooo ready

RHONE ! Bless.

i love men that means im not a lesbian

Ohhh bitch i am here! I was legit just having a mental brake down and now im here. Ohh boy!!! Im so excited to be here and now im seeing Amanda again! But me geting jenna out and willa ohh boy! Im gonna have to talk to willa and hopefully jenna isn't so harsh this time around! Ah im so excited i just hope im not a pre-juror boot because im going to be so emotional this game and hopefully play a villainous card!

toby marlow is sexy as fuck what the mhell

I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS!!!! So far, not much has happened which can be good or bad. I'm a bit nervous to be playing with returnees being on the other tribe because they might be better at immunity challenges than us. I'm a bit nervous about Pine Boy being in this game because I heard that he's really good. So far I like Toph (Azores buddy <3), Sultana, Jacob, and Nick. Nick came to me right away and said he liked me and wanted an alliance with me. I was like sure!!! Who would I be to decline an alliance? An idiot, that's what I would be. I'm wondering how we're going to do idol hunting on this season and I hope we find out soon. I want to redeem myself from my Azores mess. That reminds me, Toph being here can be really bad for both of our games. If anyone know what Azores is, they know that I gave Toph my idol. They know that we were close, which can be really bad for our games. If people look at Azores and assume that we're still close (which we are), we're fucked in the long run. I love writing confessionals, I missed that in Azores. Sure, we had Ponderosa confessionals, but I wanted to talk more game shit in there. Another thing that I'm worried about: If Toph read my in-game confessionals during Azores, he knows that I'm reluctant to play by his side again. Or, if he has a brain, he can infer it from that. Hopefully, this wont all blow up in my face. I can't wait for the shit show to start after the immunity challenge.

I really am gonna have to fight the hosts

Not letting me idol search and putting me on this tribe. There is only ONE girl on my tribe. And rhone and the boys. I hate men fuck you all. Also Jake being on my tribe when he has the personality of a dead foot yikes. I hate this tribe i hate this game. Get me my shit i wanna leave now. 

Except jordan pines and daniel they cool.

Heyo! The name’s Johnny, from Survivor: India, the guy who went through only two tie votes in his seasons, and I guess I’m ready to swing at the sandbags again. I’m glad to be back and hopefully I don’t fall in the pits that I fell in last time. I’m not settling for premerge this time ‘round. So this tribe is definitely a lot bigger & badder than I expected. Lots of personalities, lots of players, and a shit ton of self-professed “bitches”, “villains”, and whatnot. I just want to survive a while in here so I’m ready to slap on the under-the-radar happy tribe mascot sticker. But of course, the twist is revealed. I tried for the advantage but as always, my luck runs dry and I’m beaten to it. Figured Jordan Pines had it and right I was - dude won immunity. Lucky fella. Oh well, better him than ~some~ people, because at least he probably won’t want me gone first. I’ve also had some decent chats with Issy & Daniel, a bit o’ back-and-forth with Chris, and barely anything with Jake, Isaiah, and LA. And Adrian & Rhone, as far as I know, is a no-show so far. I do know Adrian though, so hopefully that gives me some brownie points! Now we’re gonna go on a tribe call and if there’s anything I know about myself, I’m both awkward and quiet on large calls so… hopefully I leave a decent impression.

So the tribe call just ended with the understanding that a second one would start, and guess what didn’t happen? It does feel a smidgen shady so hopefully there isn’t some chat without me already made because THAT would suck. After the call, though, Jake comes to me all desperate asking “We’re good right? I won’t vote you.” Dang, this guy moves quick. He asks me what I want to do and when I say wait it out for a little bit, he says “Good plan, low key wanna help the tribe.” Mate, simmer down, no need to jump on the gameplay horse so quick. I feel like he has some bad connection with someone, but I’m just not quite sure who that’d be. I know nothing about Tumblr connections, sadly. I trust Jordan right now - not too much, of course, I’ve heard how good he is at this stuff - but I’ll give him a little info and hope he reciprocates. I just wanna live until I reach a point where I can go full India mode and explode onto the scene. We’ll have to see if I can suffer through this tribe, first… I’ll just suffer well.

GUESS WHO WON IMMUNITY PEEPS ANYWAYS so since im at least surviving 1 tribal i have time to build relationships with these people, i've been talking to amanda and she's cool, and atm im on call with jacob/toph/peyton and im waiting for someone to add me to an alliance because im so talented

Everything seems pretty tame but since there is a tribal coming up, that scares me. I like Madison, Taylor, Sultana, Toph, Jacob, and Nick as of now. I'm going to watch the videos right now to see where people's heads are at right now. If I can do that, I'll be able to get a better read on everyone. Hopefully, that will help me with figuring out who to vote out. I'll pray for the best while reading Animal Farm.

CONFESSIONAL: This is my first time in tumblr survivor history that I will be present at the premiere of the season. Pretty fucking excited. I'm like a survivor noob when it comes to the premiere. I've always been gone during it so this is my first premiere ever! I am hoping my 2nd and 1st place finishes don't put a early target on my back. I just need to make sure the tribe views me as an asset as opposed to a threat CONFESS: i think my status will help me. it says something about depression i think people will like that and that should be a convo starter

so me being the little bean that i am decided to have everyone join the call and now im an alliance called the "core fore" i mean like its me Payton, madison, and Jacob! okay that was just some basic ass info. here's my thoughts on everyone else! Amanda sledge: the only person i will trust in this game. she played an idol on me in Azores and if that isn't trust i don't know what else is. Payton: he seems ok, i mean he kinda seems Plainer then Rasin Bran but i mean her has a goat farm and litty. Madison: she seems woke and i would like to work with her given her immunity win and letting everything happen with this alliance already taylor: i mean he seems ok. But like he just got on call so ill keep you posted on him. Sultana: a woke ass queen! i really wanna work with her she seems super funny and chill and like a queen of everything she dose like harassing her mom for food! i would love to work with her will she wants too as well! the others: they have said nothing so like ima try and get one of them out now or payton. dfjbndofb Ok so currently i'm in about 2 alliances! Amanda, nick and myself are in one alliance. meanwhile i'm in an alliance with  Jacob, Payton, and Madison together so like i have no idea if this is good or not because i don't wanna be caught so i feel like i need to tell Amanda so she dose not get mad and i can work with her! I really have no clue on what is going to happen. I don't want to trust anyone yet because tomorrow we will see were the lines will be drawn. I am like 50% that someone inactive will be voted off. but not if i have anything to say about that! I want payton out because i feel like he is dry and kinda basic. after all i will try and be the villain of the season oops! i honestly really like Petra though and think shes very chill and interesting. lets hope she feels the same way. i'm hoping i can just stay calm for now and then go and cry about it latter. i honestly am very hungry right now though like i ugh. Ok that is besides the point. But i feel like i need to bring my paranoid level up to like a ten because i can't trust none of these bitches or i'm gonna be scared as hell. my ears are open to everything and i have a google docs open and im ready to kill some people. 

So at the beginning of the game, me and Amanda talked alot and decided to team up. Then Amanda was good friends with Toph. So then we formed a three person alliance. While we were on call, me Amanda, Toph and Suitana formed an alliance. The twist was announced that both tribes will be going to tribal. I really hope I am not first out but I got a solid 4 person alliance called the Wig Snatchers with them.

I feel like I'm the least extra person here and some of them I think don't like that I'm not super extra

ok idk who 2 vot cuz im just a woke ass bitch and like i havent come across anyone that im rly annoyed with xcept payt TBH hes just awkward and like totally denies my humor via not laughing and everyones talking about this person called jenna they had tea drama with or smth so im like O _ O

I love being on tribe calls because late at night is when alliances are made! I'm currently in an alliance with Petra, Nick, and Toph (Seamus too). We don't have the majority yet, but I like Jacob and Madison. I hope they will vote Jenna with us. I heard nothing but bad things about her from Toph and she seemed cool, but I think right now it's our best option to get her out since she has no wifi at the moment.

Hey everyone, first confessional. I have not played in one of these games in a very long time so I feel very rusty. Anyway, this double tribal twist could really mess up my game but I can't worry about that at the moment. My plan is watch my tribemates videos and try to find common ground. I know Poteet is really embarrassed about going out premerge, and I went premerge too so we can talk about that. I need to take it one step at a time.

I have gained the trust of a good amount of the tribe, and they all are just kinda doing what I say, so i feel like i have some power suddenly. Not saying I'm on the path the a villain but we'll see what happens.

i want to die

Joy, oh joy. I wake up this morning (if 11:30 AM is considered morning) with Jake being the only message to me and I think, THAT can't be a good sign. So he reiterates him wanting to work with me, yadda yadda, badda bing, and says that he values we have history. I'm pretty sure our history is just like one or two Skype minis so unless I'm forgetting something, ripperoni. He also tells me he's "heard a few names floating around" but when I asked him who it was, no response. Go figure. Luckily, Chris Stoner messages me and tells me that as of now Jake is the vote (I'm assuming from the mind of Jordan Pines) so at least I have some solace there. I don't think I'll be going at the end of the day, but there's still the very real fear that my head's on the chopping block, and I don't want to be lynched tonight, nosiree.

So while my video confessional is uploading, it seems like I got Taylor's vote to get Jenna out! I'm really excited to not be the first boot, honestly. I'm sad though because she never got to send me pictures of her kittens. Maybe if I keep her she'll show me! Anyways, how's your day? My mom broke our snapchat streak and it's quite disappointing... like I came out of your vagina and you're going to treat me like this?? Oop my video confessional uploaded here it is in all its (not) glory!

So Jake said that Rhone had suggested Issy (due to their beef from another game, pretty sure it was a wiki game I viewed lmao) or Chris to go home. I found this a little bit fishy but then again I've found most of what Jake's been doing to be fishy. However Jake seems to think it'll be Issy going which is convenient. I also hopped on a call with Jordan Pines and we traded a bit of info - I'm not going to give him EVERYTHING persay (I've been told many stories about him so best to tread lightly) but luckily he gave me some. Jake had randomly made an alliance chat with Jordan and Rhone last night without informing either of them and both distrusted it. Jordan wants to keep some sorta secret information sharing pact between the two of us and I'm game, but I need to make sure he trusts me so I still have to actually give him credible tales. I've just gotta stay on his good side for now and be the nice, honest fella on the tribe. That'll keep me afloat until the swap (which seems like it'll be an auxillary situation. How fun). I do like Isaiah and Adrian a bit and I wouldn't mind working with those two, it'd be nice to get something rolling along with em. We'll have to see, though, because I'm not sure how social Adrian's been so far. As of now, our first boot should be Jake. Let's just hope we can stay strong and not lose to those meddlesome newbies.

I'm not going to lie... I'm a bit nervous. A tribal shouldn't be going this smoothly  unless there's something going on in the background. Dear god, let this work out. I will write more after tribal is over, I'm just too nervous right now. 

[jetsjanorra]

So About This Norway...

To answer the first question that I get a lot : Yes, I plan on writing about this new season of my life. It will happen right here so save this page somewhere in your notes. Hey, Jette! What will you do in Norway? Are you going to a university over there? For the next 8 months I’ll be attending Discipleship Training School. It’s organised by Youth With A Mission which is a global movement of Christians dedicated to knowing God and making God known. A Discipleship Training School seeks to bring people into a more intimate relationship with God. It also gives you an opportunity to discover your passions and your part in God’s purposes for the world. “It is for those who long to follow Jesus in new ways with a different perspective.” It is not an university and no, I won’t get any college credit for it. It’s a year fully dedicated to root myself in God. Soooo.... What will you be doing? Knocking on people’s doors for 8 months? I’m going to be a part of Impact DTS in Skien, Norway. It lasts for 8 months and consists of a lecture and an outreach phase. The first few months (lecture phase) of the school will be teaching weeks together with “team weeks” where smaller teams will be sent to different cities in Norway. This way we will get to practice what we’ve learned. In a team week we will get to work with local churches and schools with a special emphasis on youth ministry.

The outreach phase is really exciting. Once I’ve been able to soak in all the things that will (hopefully) equip me to serve others we’ll get thrown out of our comfort zones. The first outreach is 2 weeks long (Europe outreach) and will take place somewhere in Europe. The second outreach however will last for 2 months and is to countries outside of Europe.

“We believe that God has called us to give the good news to others, so that what has changed our lives will change theirs.”

Why did you choose this path?

As senior year of high school started, I just knew that I’m probably not going to go to university next year. I needed a break, but also I did not know what I wanted to study, so I didn’t want to waste my time doing (or studying) something I wasn’t passionate about. As I prayed, it hit me - the one true thing I wanted to do was to take a special time just for God. I just longed to be fully rooted in Him and to figure out some stuff about myself as someone who wants to serve and worship Jesus with all I’ve got.

After doing some research and talking to my mother and other dear ones, I realised that nothing else sparks this fire in my heart like youth ministry and missions do. To clarify: I’m not from a Christian background and I’m the first in my family to believe. Estonia has also been labeled as one of the least religious country in the world (and Estonians are often even proud of it). Christians can experience a lot of criticism so it’s not always easy to be one here. I wanted to have deep & steady roots to help me stand strong and still through any trial and storm that might hit my faith.

I’ve been serving in youth ministries for 5 years now. It’s been the greatest time of my life! Being able to be there for the young as they are in a place where life changes entirely almost every year is such a blessing. Seeing them opening up and taking next steps is the sight that brings me great joy. During summers I’ve been a small group leader in English Camps (Josiah Venture) where the kids get an amazing opportunity to hang out with some crazy American missionaries and learn about God. I’ve seen so many lives change and made friends for life. Serving in these camps really opened my eyes to this burning desire I have in my heart to be there for the young and to share the love of my Heavenly Father with them. Youth ministry and missions are deep in my heart. I’m just so excited to see the miracles and the change of hearts that God has planned for this year.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?”And I said, “Here am I. Send me!” (Isaiah 6:8)

Have you got accommodation and such figured out?

Yes, yes, I have! The good news is that the price includes absolutely everything - food, lectures, outreaches, team weeks stuff & even accommodation! I will be living in an old prison! Don’t worry, it’s truly amazing! I’ll even have roommates which will be something new! When high school taught me how to manage on my own, now I get to learn how to share my life with others. DTS is really built on community.

Aren’t you scared?

I’m just really excited. Most of all I just hope that this experience could be a blessing to others as well. That’s why I decided to write - maybe you’ll find something encouraging or comforting in these lines as I begin and wander through this exciting and life changing journey.

What are my options for being a part of your experience?

If you’d consider adding me to your prayers list - I’d appreciate it more than I could say. I’ll be uploading some requests here as well. If you don’t mind then please do let me know about your prayers and don’t hold back sending me your prayer requests as well.

There’s also the question of money - How did you pay for all this? How much did it cost? I’ve been blessed with the most amazing mother on this planet Earth. She’s my biggest cheerleader even though she’s not a believer and sometimes doesn’t quite understand what this Norway means either. She’s super supportive and has covered all costs. The 55 000 NOK ( that’s 7,052.87USD or 5,946.65EUR) covers absolutely everything which is a great deal! I could not do it without my momma. She’s my angel and my superhero. She’s also providing for my little brother at the same time so it’s no easy task. Please keep her in your prayers as well as this year is not going to be easy financially and emotionally.

Of course you can simply keep an eye on my Facebook, this page here and my Instagram (@jettekas). Don’t be (/become) a stranger. This is exciting and all good things are meant to be shared with others so that the true joy could blossom.  Don’t be scared to contact me. I’m not disappearing anywhere - I’ll just relocate. I do have a Christmas break so we can always make plans to meet up.

I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:3-6)