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probably-haven · 3 years ago

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Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should.

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can. Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it.

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows.

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over-

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings. I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is.

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other- Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action.

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways.

-Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though.

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips.

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself.

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt. - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing.

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth. - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced.

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that.

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead.

#genshin impact #genshin xiao #genshin venti #xiao #venti #xiaoven #genshin analysis #genshin headcanons #xiaoven headcanons #xiaoven analysis #this is a mess i really shouldnt be putting all these tags but oh well #oh wow the grammar and spelling here is truly repulsive #sorry to all my english teachers i have failed you all

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savoies · 4 years ago

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ill take the floor - patrick moynihan.

summary: only one bed trope.

word count: 1.3k.

warnings: maybe one bad word.

a/n: so here it is, one of the only tropes i have not written yet. hope you enjoy and of course thank you to caitee (@joelsfarabees ) for saying do it. this went through about four drafts so uhm enjoy! italicized and bolded is going back in time.

taglist: ( send in ask if you want to be added) @hartsyhart @nhlpetey @mitch-slap @frostythegoalman @kirbysdch @aria253264 @josty @kaitieskidmore1 @kiedhara @laurenairay @finnishmafiaa @alxvlasic @hockeyallthetime @barzy-baby @bowenbyram @martynecass @joshsandersons @connormcdavo @maattamatthews @joelsfarabees @selenophileangel @boqvistsbabe @ana-maa @stars-canucks @bowberrybyram @sidscrosbyy @2manytabsopen @wh0r3forpatrick

tagging some buds: @simplyjosty @beauvibaby @heybarzy @tkachuk-yeah @cozycozzy

Summer. Something everyone looked forward to. No more school. No more having to worry about loads of assignments and time to finally wind down and relax. For certain people that meant going on trips, going to the beach, or just staying home. But for the Moynihan family that meant renting up a beach house or cabin.

It happened every year. Having Patrick away at college and not having much free time, it was a nice way to spend some time together.

This year Patrick suggested somewhere up in the mountains where him and his buddies from Providence had gone for winter break earlier in the year. Apparently everyone else on the east coast had the same idea as him because as they made their arrangements only one cabin was up for grabs and they took it without much consideration.

In three days they would drive out three hours to their destination travel spot. So after much talk Patrick and his sister Ciara were in their living room helping their parents set everything up that needed to be taken care of.

"So Pat excited to see Y/N?" Ciara said as she looked up at her twin brother.

"Considering i haven't seen her in person this whole school year yeah im pretty excited." He smiled as he thought about seeing you again. He missed you even though you guys talked whenever you could.

"So are you gonna make a move on her this year?" Ciara said suggestively as she wiggled her eyebrows.

"I dont know what you are talking about." Patrick said as he placed the rest of his bags by the door.

"Oh I see the way you look at her." Ciara said.

You were a mutual friend. But over the years of knowing each other you grew closer to Patrick, maybe even developing a small crush on him along the way. They had invited you over to the cabin to catch up. You being away at college. Ciara knew about your crush on her brother and how her brother felt about you so she had made it her mission to get you guys to get closer on this trip. Or at least for one of you to make a move on the other.

Everyone arriving safely at the cabin except some bickering between the twin siblings.

The kids ansty to go see what the cabin had to offer. "Here go ahead." Mrs. Moynihan said as she handed them the keys and they rushed inside piling their bags in the corner of the living room.

After seeing what was behind each door all of you walked back to the living room and Mrs. Moynihan spoke up.

"2 per room, so choose wisely who your roommate for the week will be."

"I choose Casey." Ciara spoke up almost too quickly. "Sorry Pat you're a snorer and Y/N you stay up way too late, i need my beauty sleep."

"Are you ok with this?" Patrick turned to face you.

"Yeah i'm good. I mean we are both adults sort of. Yeah we can handle it." You smiled at him and shot a glance at Ciara.

"So now that that's settled let's start dinner." Mrs. Moynihan said as she led you all to the kitchen.

~~~

All of you sat around the fireplace outside as you finished dinner. Roasting marshmallows and eating smores.

The adults then going inside and leaving you guys outside as you talked and stargazed.

"I think i'm gonna head inside im getting pretty tired." You said as you got up and said your goodnights.

"What Y/N going to sleep before any of us, that's a first." Ciara spoke up.

"Oh shut up." You said hitting her shoulder playfully. Pat jogging up to catch up to you as both of you headed to the farthest bedroom.

"What not wanting to get bombarded on your love life by your sisters?" You raised your eyebrows playfully at him.

"Like i have one." He laughed.

"Oh really hotshot pat doesn't have a love life, i highly doubt that." Both of you laughing about it and stepping in your bedroom.

After both of you changed you each stood on one side of the bed.

"So uhm i can take the floor." Patrick said as he grabbed the pillow.

"Pat I am not letting you sleep on the floor. Not like we haven't fallen asleep together on the couch before. It's fine." You said as both of you got under the covers turning your backs against each other.

~~~

A few days had passed and it seemed that every day that passed both you and Patrick got closer and closer each morning waking up in each other's arms, the first night being kind of awkward.

Waking up you didn't expect to have Patrick's arm around you, less likely as tightly as it was.

Not sure what to do if you should wake him up or not you laid there staring at the high ceiling until he finally stirred awake.

"Shit my bad." He said as he quickly removed his arm from around your waist and blushed, you missing his warmth as soon as he did so.

"Well why are you avoiding eye contact." Ciara said as both of you walked out of the room and walked separate ways.

Bringing you back to the present where everyone was eating breakfast getting ready to head out to the lake.

"Y/N hurry up cause Casey is still asleep."

You quickly heading to change as Ciara basically pushed the cereal down your throat for you to hurry up.

You looking through all of your bags, the car, the living room, and lastly the bathroom and not finding your bathing suit.

"Oh no. Oh no this can't be happening." You said as you thought about if you packed it or not.

"What's up?" Moyni questioned as he saw your distressed look.

"My bathing suit. I think I forgot it at home."

"Well why don't you ask Ciara. She always brings like five because according to her they all look different on her depending on the weather." Pat said as you shouted thank you and ran out of the bedroom. But not before taking in his figure as he sat on the edge of the bed with his swim trunks and sandals.

'Hey Ciara, I forgot my swimsuit. Can i borrow one please?" You said as she soon laid out all of the options out and you picked out the one that would make you feel less insecure.

"Isn't it a bit small." You said as you walked out and covered your chest.

"I think it's cute. And someone else seems to think so also." She said as Pat was already looking at you when you stepped out into the living room.

"Pat close your mouth, you'll catch flies." Ciara whispered to her brother.

Everyone out on the lake that day having fun until they were physically exhausted. Both you and Moyni every so often looking at each other and averting eye contact whenever Ciara or anyone else would look at you guys.

"You know the sexual tension earlier was just wow." Ciara told you as everyone headed to their rooms for bed.

"Oh shut up."

"You know it's the truth."

~~~

As time to head home neared both of you pretended to be asleep and cuddled into eachothers arms more often.

The last morning at the cabin both of you woke up as you curled into Patrick's chest. "You know i can get used to this." He said.

"Well maybe we should do it more often." You said as you smiled at him. Maybe it was a good thing that Ciara had been planning this all along, since after that trip both of you finally actually did something about the mutual feelings.

#hockey boys #hockey #patrick moynihan x reader #patrick moynihan #providence hockey #hockey blurbs #hockey fics #hockey blurb #hockey fic #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #ari writes #not my fav so i might do this trope again #and no i wasnt gonna erase 1k words ro start over #at least it gets 10 notes ahaha

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letthefrogsbe · 3 years ago

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remember when I was gonna write that parkner fic?

cool so I've decided I'm gonna, but because I cannot write for SHIT and I hate my writing every time I see it, ill just share my outline of what I have so far. its not coherent. sorry.

Section one: aunt may dies. It’ll be like “it's been 3 months. 3 months since May was shot. 2 months and 3 weeks since she died.”

Something like that idc. Basically this section will base around peter living tony, because he’s not doing well, and he is only 17- which is not actually old enough to be on your own after something like this. Setting is established, with cameos from dr strange (who tony is dating and lives with (yeah bite me, this is my fanfiction i can make it what i want.) it will be made obvious that this takes place after endgame, which also means that tony is Not going to die. I’m not that mean lmao. The avengers are like largely together, there was not as much death in this as there was in endgame. Whatever. Everyone is very nice to peter because they know that for him its either this or him becoming a ward of the state so like.

Section two: harley gets kicked out. His mom finds out that he’s gay (from gossip sources idk) and kicks harley out. Im not going to write them having a big fight like in the moment, but harley will recount what happened somewhat to tony in this section, and then more to peter later in the story. Gay ppl trauma dump, we know this. Okay anywaysss so harley calls tony literally sobbing and like freezing fucking cold. IM SORRY IM BEING SO MEAN TO THEM I PROMISE THEY'LL GET A HAPPY ENDING. Okay. harley explains how his mom kicked him out. Tony asks why, harley says something like “she didn’t agree with my lifestyle choices” like bitterly. Tony is a good person in this (i know, im really taking some character liberties) and he’s in the mood for collecting strays apparently, so he has happy send over the quinjet. He can’t make it himself bc hes in fucking japan or something for the next few weeks,, but. Yeah! Tony also calls peter, who is presumably in bed and feeling depressed. “Hey pete. How ya feeling? Any better?’ ‘Not really, tony. Sorry.’ ‘you don’t have to be sorry-’ ‘damn tony you sound like my therapist.’ “sorry pete, but i do have something to tell you- you know harley?’ ‘only from what you’ve told me about him, but yea. He was the tennessee garage kid, right?’ ‘i mean. Yes. so- he’s gonna come stay with me for a while too- it might not be permanent but it will probably be a bit. He’s about your age, and he just has no where to go (just like u). He’s not going to stay in your room or anything, but with bruce and thor here, he will be in your apartment area.’ ‘okay tony.. Will i have to talk to him a bunch?’ ‘not if you don’t want to- i already warned him about you, so it should be okay. I wouldn’t worry so much pete- you guys are so similar in a lot of ways that i wanted to introduce you two long before he called me.’ ‘okay tony, i trust you. Thank you again for letting me stay with you :)’ (yeah that kind of got away from me)

Section 3: build up. this is a shorter section. Harley and peter are gonna meet in section 4. This section is harley’s jet ride (with an intuitive happy) and harley’s nerves about how he really isn’t worth this (i mean hes pretty intimidated tony sent a private jet just for him) and happy like reassures him. Hes still insecure though. Peter is also nervous bc what if harley doesn’t like him? What if he doesn’t like harley?? Tony did say they would get along, but peter hasn’t really been himself recently, so who knows? Yeah lots of that. I do want to emphasize though- peter is not completely unhealthily coping. Like he has a therapist and he has been reaching out to ned and mj, but its still an open wound for him. Obviously. He still has a sense of humor though, but its to cover these deep insecurities. Like the first month or so that he was with tony, he was reallllyyyy trying to not get close to him bc he sort of thinks he kills everyone around him. Like logically he knows this isn’t true, but he does really think the that non superheroes that he surrounds himself with are very at risk if they know about his spider-man-ness. The only people who know now are ned and mj (may knew too).

Section 4: the meeting of harley and peter. Keep in mind peter has been living in this apartment/area of stark tower for about 3 months now. He actually moved in while may was in the hospital because he couldn’t stand to be alone in the apartment when he knew why may wasn’t there. And um. Yeah. so peter is like comfortable in this space, basically. Also- the reason theyre in the same apartment is because stark tower was not really created with the idea of housing broken orphans in mind, so it only has a certain amount of residential space. Thor and bruce are currently staying there together (although no one really knows if theyre together, or if theyre just best bros who went through some extreme trauma together and are now inseparable. Hmmm wonder if thats gonna come up later) and theyre using one apartment, and happy lives there with his own apartment, and tony and stephen are currently sharing the penthouse, even though thats not public knowledge. Really only the people close to tony know that he’s dating stephen. So. this leaves just the one other 2 bedroom apartment for peter and harley. It has one bathroom, and the bedrooms are connected by a door but theyre pretty big so like. Theres a kitchen, a living room with a fancy ass tv, and a really pretty view (with a balcony bc <333). May died in march, peter got leave from the school in april, and it is now the middle of june btw. Tony is now peter’s official guardian (he was before may died anyways) and now has sole guardianship over him which he has fully accepted, even though peter and him both know that there are going to be times where he has to go out of town bc he does own a company after all. Times like right now. Harley is pretty nervous that tony isn’t going to be there to greet him and that he is going to have to like introduce himself to peter and everything. Cmon, theres no reason to feel like that, he’s the one intruding after all, he should at least be able to handle himself. (<--- harley’s thoughts). Yeah so theyre insecure super cool. A n y w a y s so peter was stressing about harley as he arrived, and so when harley walked in they were both complete bundles of nerves. Harley walks up but knocks. Peter actually jumps (bc spidey sense okay whatever) and goes to get the door. Oh my god these awkward teenagers i hate them so much (i love them). Peter kinda looks like shit, sorry king. He was a little bit crying earlier, then tony called and he switched into stressed out ball-of-anxiety mode. Distractions are good, its okay. Peter opens the door for harley and they like introduce each other all awkward (again sorry) and peter shows harley where he is staying. Harley doesnt really have muchhhh bc he was kicked out and all. He just has a suitcase full of clothes, his favorite blanket, his favorite stuffed animal (yeah whatever bc ofc he does) and his phone/charger. He sets all his stuff down at once. He thanks peter for letting him stay in his apartment and also said sorry. First thing peter noticed was harley’s accent. Stfu. peter asks why harley’s here- ok. Harleys had a long ass day. Too fucking long. He- he breaks down. He tells peter a lot. About how his mom found out that he was gay, and how she told him never to come back. Yikes. Anyways, this is establishing the beginning of their relationship as friends. Peter is there for him even though he doesn’t know him at all. Peter sees some of himself in harley in this moment, even though he’s not talking about himself yet. Eventually harley does ask about peter, and they really just get to know each other really quick. They have these deep scarring individual traumas, and neither has nearly recovered, but they find comfort in just knowing that theyre not alone in their suffering. At least for now. At least in this moment.

Section 5: the next day. Peter and harley spent that whole night talking about what they were going through. Peter said good night at around 5 am (there were no adults around they can do what they want to) and they both got good sleeps. In peter’s case, one of the first solid nights he’s had in a while. Harley was kept up a little longer after peter left, however, because he just couldn’t shut off his mind. It was really cathartic for him to just lay everything out there and for someone to just accept him. Peter told him he was bi, but he was.. Lucky. He had accepting people in his life. May was accepting. God, harley couldn’t fathom having lost everyone in his life, everyone he ever cared about, and still having the heart to sit and talk with the dumbass anxious gay kid who can’t go home anymore. His problems felt so small compared to peter’s, and all he could do was admire peter’s resilience and how he was seemingly able to bounce back from anything. God, peter was something. He couldn’t wait to get to know him more. With that thought circling in his head, he finally went to sleep at oh shit 6:30 am. Peter woke up around 1. Harley at 2. When harley woke up, peter was watching tv and eating cereal on the couch and he just sat down next to him. No words, just sleepy children being sleepy. They stayed like this for like an hour when someone knocked on their door. Enter stephen strange!!!!!!!!!!! Get excited people. Hes just coming in to check on them bc tony told him to, and he didn’t get the chance last night bc he was _busy_. K so now he’s here and hes awkward and he just wants to make sure these boys r okay bc theyve both been through too much recently, and it would be just the cherry on top if they didn’t get along. Him and harley had never actually met before so he like introduced himself and all that. Offered like if they needed anything he was there, and its only gonna be a few days until tony gets back (did i say a week earlier? Im retconning that bc i cannot find it in my writing so it is now retconned). Peter and harley just have to sort of explain to dr strange that theyre getting along gREAT and there is no need for concern….. And peter was even thinking about showing harley around the city a bit that night (something he had not yet told harley, but wanted to make it seem like he was doing well and not acting too depressed in front of Dr. Strange) so dr strange is like yeah !!!!!! do that, that sounds super fun petey !!!!!! and so now they have evening plans

ok ps I wrote this like 2 weeks ago and completely forgot I posted something on Tumblr about this fic idea, and so this is literally just how I talk to myself. was not gonna ever post this but then I decided to because I'm bored. there are more sections but I'm not gonna post them rn because this post is really fucking long already!!!!

#hope this is marketable??#sort of just wanted to share my 4 am writing tbh #it doesn't make sense just go w it #parkner #peter parker #harley keener

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violetnotez · 5 years ago

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Omg I know anon poor baby is always getting hurt! 🥺 I’m sorry this took so long, but I hope you like it!

Genre: Fluff, PG

Word Count: 2951

Warnings: none!

Summary: Izuku expects to find himself with Recovery Girl after he gets hurts in training yet again. How surprised he is to find it’s actually you who gets to take care of his wounds.

Prompt: #2, “You wanna get out of here?” for the @bnhabookclub Provisional Licensing Event!

(Here’s the link)

Izuku’s leg jumped as he waited impatiently in the sterile white room.

This was now the 3rd time he was in the nursing office this week alone, and it was beginning to exasperate him how easily his body could get damaged in simple training.

He had to work to be harder. Faster. Stronger.

And he couldn’t do that without getting a little torn up and beaten up-it’s the fact he didn’t know when to stop that was the trouble.

Recovery Girl had told him that multiple times since he had became a regular visitor in her office, even threatening to speak to Aizawa-Sensei and revoke some of his training hours.

That was the very last thing Izuku ever wanted to happen: he had to train. But he laso had to put everything into it: if he didn’t, how wouldnt ever get better.

Izuku heard a door inside the office open, looking up to meet Recovery Girl with a sheepish grin.

But to his surprise, it wasn’t Recovery Girl-it was a student.

They didn’t seem to notice him at first as they began to rummage in filing cabinets, their fingers nimbly searching through the organized folders.

Izuku stared with reddened cheeks-they were pretty cute.

But where was Recovery Girl? Maybe they were her assistant, but no, he was in the nurses office so much he would have known-

“Um, excuse me? Are you injured-do you need help?” The attractive person asked, their eyes looking down at him. They were right in front of him now, staring at him with an amused smirk as he thought out loud.

Izuku yelped, realizing a moment too late that he was mumbling again. His whole face became enveloped in red, his freckles much more prominent as he looked up.

“No-actually, um-yes, yes, I am hurt, just not badly,its really just a scratch -“ he was rambling again, instantly stopping as he realized how silly he sounded. His cheeks were on fire, and he was feeling so sheepish and dumb. Why couldn’t he form a single sentence correctly? This person was just too attractive, he couldn’t think straight-

He was surprised to here the person chuckle, their body bending down to be at eye level with him.

“Why am I not surprised Izuku Midoriya is in the nurses office again?” You grinned at his clearly shocked face, his green eyes wide with bewildernment.

“How-how do you know my name?” He asked, his eyebrows knitted in confusion.

You smiled at the nervous boy, your eyes drinking in his face-he was pretty attractive, his cheeks dusted with pink and his freckles scattered around his face like stars. His eyes were a pretty shade of forest green, his messy hair matching it perfectly.

You knew you should be checking for his vitals and any obvious injuries that were life threatening, thats what you’ve been taught after all-but if he had enough blood to blush that hard a few moments ago, he was more than likely fine.

“Well, your practically a honorary resident in the office at this point” you smiled playfully.

You remember him? That made Izuku’s heart soar, knowing somebody as cute as you could actually recall who he was.

Izuku felt a twinge of guilt though, because if you had seen him so many other times, why was this his first time seeing you?

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude, really,” he stuttered out, “but I don’t-seem to remember you-“

“Oh, don’t feel bad!” You comforted him, “Ive only just started interning with Recovery GIrl these past two weeks,”

“My name’s y/n.” you gave him a warm smile, making Izuku’s insides feel fuzzy.

You began to rummage in the cabinet on the wall, pulling out a small first aid- kit.

“You just happen to hear alot of things once your around teachers more,” you answered his question happily, opening the kit on the bed Izuku was sitting on.

“Like-like what?” he was a little concerned by that- were the teachers in some way talking negatively about him?

You noticed the way his expression changed to worry, giving him a calm smile.

“Its nothing bad, dont worry,” you reassured him, “Recovery Girl actually has quite a soft side for you- its just shes worried about how hard you work yourself.

“You definitely have a reputation for getting yourself pretty banged up, dont’cha?” you giggled at the way Izuku gave you such a guilty, sheepish grin as he fidgeted with his scarred hands.

He chuckled along with you, “More a less- I guess…”

He watched you pull out items from the white box:soft gauze, a vile of clear liquid, fluffy cotton balls, brand new bandages-

“If you dont mind me asking- is Recovery Girl not here today?” he asked

“Nope! Shes on break right now,” you explained, pulling a chair from under the bed he was sitting on, “so you got me for today,”

You scouted the chair in close, so you were practically in between Izuku’s legs and looking right up at him. He felt his body heat up from the sudden closeness-you seemed so calm, collected, and in control, while he was feeling like nervous wreck from how close you were..

“So, you injured your side, right? On the left?” you asked, looking at the torn clothing on his abdomen.

He gave you a curt nod, his green curls bouncing slightly.

You looked up at him suddenly, his breath stopping in his chest.

“Mind if I look?” you asked, your voice sweet like honey.

“Uh, sure go ahead- just, be careful- its pretty, bruised-”

“Oh, dont worry ‘Zuku, Ill be gentle,” you sent the boy a wink, making his head spin.

Wait- were you flirting with him?

He felt your hands gingerly prod against his PE shirt, the fabric practically worthless around his injury. Your hand left a ticklish feeling against his skin, like kisses trailing along the surface. They sent his stomach into a frenzy, making it felt like it was made out of cotton.

You hand reached lower, towards his 4th rib bone, prodding slightly as you went along. Izuku instinctively hissed in pain as you touched a certain spot- that was the most tender area by far.

You gave him a worried expression, a quiet sorry spilling out of your lips as you retracted your hand.

You rested your chin against your fingers, your lips pouted out slightly as you sat there deep in thought.

“You definitely got a good injury there-” you concluded, “but Im not too worried about it. A couple bandages and maybe something for the bruising….and you should be good to go!”

Izuku breathed a sigh of relief, being careful to not exhale too much in order to not irritate his wound.

“Thats a relief!”

You looked down, your teeth catching your bottom lip in nervousness by what you were going to say next. You had to heal it, but the only way to do it would need Izuku to get a little bit more comfortable with you.

“But….in order for me to properly heal it-

“Your gonna have to take off your shirt Izuku.”

Izuku could barely breathe now- take off his shirt- in front of you??

He could have gotten a cut anywhere- his arm, leg, shoulder- but no, he got it on his stomach. Where you, this pretty nurses assistant, would have to see him close to naked.

He know he shouldn't be so worried, this was your job after all, you probably seen plenty of have naked students come and go due to injuries- it just felt strange.

“Are-are you sure, I think Ill be fine, you dont have to, its okay Ill just-” he began to ramble, his mouth making word soup as his anxiety kicked in.

“Izuku,” you sighed calmly, “you wanna get out of here, right?”

He nodded numbly, his green eyes full of concern and sheepish from the turn of events.

“Then your gonna have to trust me,” you placed your hand on his knee, leaning into his body softly.

God- you were- so- close.

Izuku felt his face heat up, unable to think properly. How were you so okay with being so close? You seemed so unfazed by being this near him, your voice calm and reassuring. He, on the other hand, was practically shaking from shock and nervousness.

“I wont judge you for anything, I promise,” you gave him a cheeky grin, letting your eyes trail to his torso, “-and I don’t think you have anything to worry about,”

The boy was always training, non-stop- at least that’s what you heard from the teachers.

You were practically certain this boy was only made of hardened muscle, watching how is arms ripples with each movement and the built muscle move under your fingertips.

If he was worried he wasnt in the best physique to be near a girl shirtless, you were quite certain he was sorely mistaken.

And if giving him some praise was going to make him feel a little comfortable-you would give him as much as he needed.

Izuku shuffled in his seat again, crinkling the thin paper on the bed.

“O-okay then-I trust you,” he said, trying to sound a little more confident, “Do what you have to do.”

“Awesome!” You exclaimed softly. “I have to go get a few more things..:in the mean time, try to take off that shirt, Kay? Be gentle-and don’t be afraid to call me if you need help,”

You gave him a reassuring pat on the knee, rising from your chair to get larger bandages from another cabinet. You turned your back to Midoriya, walking over to another cabinet and rummaging through the boxes until you found the perfect size bandages.

You felt your hands shake slightly, your heart beating feverishly against your chest.

Why were you nervous? Was his hesitancy rubbing off on you now? You shouldn’t be scared in any way-you were quite accustomed to this, already working on a handful of other students since interning with Recovery Girl. This shouldn’t be a such a nerve-wracking problem-you has seen countless shirtless boys-

But you had never seen Izuku shirtless-and that was a first.

You willed yourself to take a calming breath, trying to coax your stampeding heart to lull to a normal pace. You had to be comfortable for him at least-he was so beet red in the face from worry he practically looked like a he had a fever.

“Hey Midoriya, you doing alright-“ you began as you turned around, trying to sound as cheerful as possible until your eyes feel on Izuku, your breath hitched in your throat.

This boy was built like a god.

His arm muscles gleamed in the fluorescent lights, almost sparkling as they slumped gently with his breaths. His pecks protruded our nicely, and his abdomen was a sight to be seen. Your hands itched to run along his abs, each one perfectly rounded and built. His v-line made you blush as it set deep into his skin, barely pecking out from his pants.

You could now fully see the injury, the only thing that was disrupting the masterpiece that was Izuku’s body. The red Cuts and purple bruises looked shallow as they encased around his 4th and 5th ribs.

“Is it-that bad?” he asked timidly,’his green orbs staring intently at your shocked face.

You shook your head of your stare, your cheeks inflamed-you couldn’t just be so blatantly enraptured by him. You secretly thanked that Izuku was kind of clueless and thought you were freaking out over his wound, because any other person would have known you were really just checking him out.

“Oh no! Your injury is fine,” you gave him a sheepish grin, placing the boxes on his bed.

His injury was easily fixable, and not at all serious- you were just so confused. How could someone so cute and endearing be so HOT.

“You really do train hard, huh, Midoriya?” You gave another glance at his abdomen, making Izuku chuckle nervously.

You pushed the chair you had sit in under the bed, deciding it would be easier to work on him if he was standing.

Oh geez-youd be the death of him-

you were now standing in between his legs, your hands ghosting the skin on his knees as you stared at him with those pretty eyes of yours.

He gave another small chuckle, his hand going up to scratch the back of his neck. The movement didnt react to well with his injury, a sharp pain crawling up his body. He winced, instinctively holding his side as you looked at him with worry.

“Is it alright if I-” your hands went to lightly touch his side, but he moved to block it away from your touch.

He realized his movements might have looked rude to you, his eyes growing wide with worry.

“I-I’m Sorry, I didn’t mean to-“ he began to feverishly apologize, but quickly stopped once he felt you place your hand on his lower thigh.

“It’s fine, Izuku, really, I’d do the same thing to,” you gave him a soft smile, squeezing his thigh gently.

That action made his whole body feel like jello, his mind only focusing on the way your hand was so gentle against his skin.

“Do you still trust me, though?”

“O-of course!” He exclaimed, his eyes wide.

“Alright then-I promise I’ll be as gentle as possible, Kay?” You said softly, your voice so soothing to Izuku it felt like a lullaby in his ears.

He nodded his head, his curls cascading over his eyes slightly as you took your hand off his leg, his eyes watching your every move.

Your fingers gently ran against the bruised skin, making sure to be as soft and gentle as you could with the infliction.

You didn’t want to cause him any type of unnecessary pain, but sometimes it was necessary to get the job done.

“I-uh-I have to clean your wounds,” you looked up at Izuku, surprised to see how gentle his eyes were as he looked down at you. He seemed to be much calmer, but the way he looked so dazed and in bliss made your heart thump painfully in your chest.

“It might sting a little, but I promise after that, it won’t hurt any more than it does.”

“That alright, I-I won’t take any offense, your doing what you have to do,” he grinned slightly at you, his freckles like stars against his cheeks.

You returned the sweet gesture, trying to focus back on his wound and not the way Izuku was making you feel.

He was so sweet and so adorably awkward, you couldn’t help but feel something towards the boy that was more than just a friendship feeling. He really was different than any other boy you had ever talked to.

You began working on his cuts, sterilizing each one, and making sure they were completely clean so they wouldnt get any type of infection.

Your heart went out for this poor boy-he really was strong. You had always hated this part whenever getting an injury, and he took it like a champ.

He only hissed once, his eyes and nose scrunched up, reminding of you when a bunny sniffs something it didn’t quite like. He body tensed for a split second, his hands curling around the bed. You placed your hand gently on his, making sure that he knew you were still there. You gave him an apologetic expression, his eyes looking down at you delicately, reassuring you that it was alright.

The room was deathly quiet, yet it was comfortable-you focused solely on Izuku, placing an ointment on the open flesh in order to help it heal. You made sure to keep your hands clean in order to not spread any possible infection, walking away to clean your hands at certain times.

Midoriya hated when you left, missing the warmth your body radiated off. It was intoxicating, really-you were so incredibly gentle and sweet with him. Your hands were so soft and light he sometimes couldn’t even feel you working to heal his injury. He was cherishing each moment: the way he could almost feel your heart rate from your wrist against his skin, the way your fingers would brush against the inner side of his arms by accident, sending a tingle to shoot up throughout his body. He loved how your voice was so soothing and tender, and the way you took time to make sure he was comfortable, asking him if this area hurt the most, if he felt the bandages were too tight, if he needed anything for the bruising.... You were so kind and considerate it made his heart soar with how much you cared for him in this moment.

His chest exhaled sadly when you moved away from him for the last time, realizing you had finally fixed him up.

You stared at your handiwork, your hands a little firmer this time as you moved in quickly, wrapping your fingers against the thick bandages.

“Does this feel fine? Do you feel this? Is it too tight?” You asked for what seemed like the uptenth time, making Izuku chucke sweetly.

He really didnt mind all your questions: he found it quite endearing actually.

“Yep! I’m fine, honestly, you don’t have to worry,” he gave a sheepish grin, gently trying to move to get off the bed.

You instantly rushed to help him, your hands gingerly finding a place in the crook of his elbow and his waist, guiding him off the bed.

He smiled up at you, your heart soaring as the freckled boy gave you such a warm look of appreciation.

You fidgeted nervously, sadly letting go of your hands on his body and tucking a hair behind your ear.

“Your free to go if you want Izuku, it was really nice meeting you!” You gave him one last smile, his heart dropping sadly as he smiled back.

“It was really nice meeting you too, it’s-too bad we don’t have any classes together, you seem, well, really nice!” He was practically stuttering again, yet your warm laugh made him feel a little at ease.

“Oh don’t worry about that Izuku, I’m sure you’ll be back in here in no time! I hope you don’t be too beat up then, but I look forward to it,”

“Me-me too”

And with one last smile, he walked out the door, his heart beating feverishly in his chest.

Taggings:

@birds-have-teeth @yuueimagines @orokayagi @leeeah-loooser @freckledoriya

#bnha #bnha x reader #izuku x reader #izuku midoriya x reader #bnha izuku x reader #mha izuku x reader #deku x reader #bnha deku x reader #deku #midoriya x reader #midoriya x you #bnha midoriya x reader #bnha izuku midoriya x reader

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writingsbymarie · 5 years ago

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Its You

Word count: a whole 5.4k

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female!Osterfield!reader

Warnings: Some steamy make outs, dancing without space for Jesus, swearing, Harrison being a cockblock lol

A/n: This is the longest Fic I’ve ever written so I hope yall like it.

Masterlist

Harrison is probably the biggest pain in your ass. Yes, you loved your older brother, but he was extremely overprotective when it came to you. Yes as your older brother he was “responsible” for you but sometimes it could be annoying as hell. You and Harrison currently shared a flat together splitting the price in half. The college you were going to was right by his flat so he offered to let you live in the other room in his flat since he was looking for a roommate since Tom was gone a lot and honestly so was Harrison which was definitely nice. But on the topic of Tom. Tom Holland had to be the nicest guy you ever met. You had a huge crush on him and by huge your in love with him. Your crush started 4 years ago. You were 15 and he was 19. Tom came over to see Harrison, but Harrison was running late. You were sitting on the couch wrapped in the blankets with a bowl of popcorn watching The Avengers when you heard someone open the door.

“Harrison” you called thinking he was back from the store.

“Not Harrison, it’s Tom,” he said as he walked into the living room. He was wearing a tight white shirt with sweatpants making you drool a bit. Before you had a crush you always thought he was hot, but then that developed into feelings.

“Harrison is at the store right now, but he should be back soon. You can watch Avengers with me until he comes if you want” you smiled patting the couch gesturing him to sit down.

“Could never say no to Avengers” he laughed taking a seat next to you. You looked over at him to see goosebumps arise on his skin, so you shifted puting half the blanket over him. You also scooted closer to him and your legs were touching. He smiled at you making you blush and look down which he definitely notice making you want to hide under the blanket.

“Ya know this is gonna be you in like a year” you grinned, and he laughed.

“Yeah I don’t really know how to handle it I’m still freaking out” he laughed covering his face.

“You’re going to be amazing, you are so talented, and soon you’re going have a whole army of fangirls, you’re gonna be a Harry Styles” you declared putting your hand on his shoulder.

“You think so” he questioned. “Its a lot to take in, and I’m the third Spiderman what if I’m so much worse than Toby and Andrew”

“Tom, trust me, you are going to be incredible and they are gonna love you” you assured, and he smiled at you which he had done many times before, but this time your heart melted and you felt the heat rise to your cheeks yet again.

“Thanks, Y/N” he replied grabbing your and hand and giving it a squeeze.

And that was the day you realized you had a crush on Tom, and flash forward 4 years later and that so-called crush was now love. And your love for Tom was now starting to drive you a bit crazy. Due to your crush on him you broke off things with guys way too frequently, and you knew that you would always be his best friends younger sister, but you had some hope that maybe, just maybe he felt the same way.

“Harrison can Willow and I please come to the club with you tonight, we can’t get in without you and Tom” you begged. There was a club by your flat that was supposed to be one of the best, but it was so hard to get into, but since you knew a certain celebrity that was going tonight you could get in with him.

“I do not need to see you wasted all over a bunch of guys, absolutely not I am not clubbing with you” he maintained causing you to groan.

“Ugh Harrison please, it’s supposed to be the best night they have had in a while and I’m 19 you have to stop acting like im 14 please” you complained.

“Harrison just let her come it’s gonna be an awesome night” called a voice from down the hallway. It was Tom who was staying at your flat to catch up with Harrison for the week. You felt heat rush to your face but quickly brushed it off.

“SEE, Tom agrees that you’re being overdramatic so Willow and I are going” you declared with a smile on your face. You were pretty sure Harrison’s eyes rolled to the back of his head.

“Fine, but if I see any guy touching you, ill beat his arse” Harrison grumbled as he walked to the kitchen. You saw Tom emerge from the hallway with no shirt making you feel a bit dizzy. He held out his fist and you bumped yours with his giving him a smile.

“Thanks” you breathed looking at the ground to stop yourself from checking out his body. He had just finished filming for Far From Home and his muscles were honestly too much for you to handle. You started to walk forwards towards your room to call your friend, but of course, you ran into slipping in on the tile causing you to fall. But you didn’t hit the ground. Toms strong arms caught you and your hands were currently places on his bare chest. And to say you were gone was an understatement. You looked up and met his eyes taking a deep breath. When you realized where your hands were you immediately removed them your face literally turning tomato red.

“Sorry” you squeaked practically darting past him to your room. You quickly shut the door putting you back against it taking a deep breath. You put your face into your hands feeling the warmth from being so embarrassed. You walked to your bed flopping down on it. You grabbed your phone and messaged your best friend Willow telling her tonight was a go. Tonight was the night you were going to get over your ridiculous crush on Tom and find a cute guy and have the time of your life.

***

You were leaving for the club in about 5 minutes. Willow had arrived at your flat wearing a skin-tight navy blue dress with satin pumps. You were wearing something similar except your dress wasn’t as short, and it was red. You walked to your room grabbing your purse. As you walked out of your room you ran into Tom whose eyes widened when he saw you. You swore you saw his eyes skim over your body, but you pushed that thought to the back of your mind. He was wearing a black button-up with jeans and well he looked hot as fuck.

“You clean up nice Osterfield” he smirked, and when you say you almost passed out you were not lying. Your whole body felt like it was on fire, and as he said that he for sure checked you out.

“T-thanks” you stuttered walking away from him towards Willow who looked like she was about to burst out laughing after seeing that whole altercation. You quickly gave her the death glare. Harrison walked out of the bathroom and the second he looked at you his jaw dropped.

“Okay yeah, you are not wearing that” he exclaimed making you frown.

“Haz, I can wear whatever I want, and out uber is here, so we have to go,” you said before he could say anything else you grabbed Willow’s arm and walked out the door. Harrison jumped into the front seat and you sat in the middle between Tom and Willow. Your thighs were touching and your heart was racing and Willow could tell, so she started laughing. You just shook your head leaning your head back on the seat. The club was only a Ten-minute drive so you were there in no time. You got out of the car and took a deep breath. You were going to find a cute boy, get drunk and forget about Tom.

You walked towards the entrance behind Tom and Harrison. Tom showed his Id and gestured for you guys to go in. You walked in to see lights flashing and music booming. Willow immediately grabbed your hand dragging you to the bar.

“Stay safe” yelled Harrison as you walked off. You turned one last time to give him a thumbs up and then you disappeared into the crowd of people. You both took a seat at the bar ordering a shot of vodka to take the edge off. The bartender poured the vodka into the shot glass and you downed it the taste burning your throat. You shook your head making a disgusted face from the horrible taste and Willow laughed and took hers. The bartender then gave you some kind of margarita and told you it was from the guy to the right of you. He was cute, but he looked a little old for you so you just smiled and looked away. Your eyes traveled to the dancefloor as you sipped your drink. Your eyes landed on Tom who was dancing with a gorgeous brunette which honesty stung. But when you made eye contact with him. He winked. The dude fucking winked, and honestly, you thought you imagined it because you were a little tipsy, but he definitely winked. You turned quickly ordering another vodka downing it once again. You were never going to get over him you thought as you leaned against your hand closing your eyes. You felt a tap on your back thinking it was just some random guy you stood up and turned around to say you werent in the mood to dance, but you were face to face with Tom.

“Hey” he bubbled stumbling a bit. He was much more intoxicated than you obviously.

“Hi” you responded a bit confused why he left the dance floor with the girl he was with before to talk to you.

“Are you having fun” he questioned wiggling his eyebrows. Making you laugh a bit.

“Yeah” you lied. He obviously noticed because his smile turned to a frown. He grabbed you handed making your whole body go stiff.

“Come dance with me, I want you to have fun” he beamed dragging you to the crowded dance floor. You were too shocked to say anything and before you could protest you were on the dance floor. Tom started dancing like an idiot shaking his arms and jumping up and down to the beat making you giggle. You swayed a bit to the music still nervous to do anything. Tom noticed that you were uneasy. He came closer to you and put his lips close to your ear.

“Just relax Y/N, and dance I swear it feels so much better when you just feel the music and forget about your problems” he assured and then backed away and smiled. You took a deep breath. He was right you were being uptight and worrying too much. You knew you should be enjoying this because you were currently dancing with your crush. Even though this was not your goal of the night you should make the most of it. You smiled back and started to sway your body to the music. You lost yourself in the music forgetting all of your problems just like Tom told you to. You danced with yourself for a song until you were pushed into Tom by another girl. You took this opportunity to wrap your arms around his neck. You refused to look at his face, but he didn’t object. Instead, his hands found your waist. You were already steaming hot from dancing and being enclosed in so many people, but somehow you felt yourself get even hotter. You both swayed to the music and you rested your head on his shoulder. You decided to make a bold move and you turned your body pressing your back against Toms. Honestly, you were making a move, and the only reason you were was probably the alcohol. Tom’s hands remained on your waist, but his grip got a bit tighter as your bum rubbed up against his groin. You felt his breath on your neck making you dizzy. He left a couple of kisses on your neck and then he spun you around to face him. This time you looked up at his face. There was a lot of tension, to say the least. His eyes went from your eyes to your lips and his head began to slowly get closer to yours, and suddenly reality hit you. You were about to kiss Tom Holland. The person you have been in love with for way too long. It was 100% the alcohol because there is no way you could this sober. You closed the gap connecting your lips with his. His lips were soft against yours. It was a slow sensual kiss. He pulled away, your foreheads still connected.

“You’re Beautiful” he proclaimed, and he kissed you again. This time it was much faster and needier. You pulled him as close as you could and his hands fell to you bum making you gasp into the kiss. He took that as an opportunity and slipped his tongue into your mouth. Your tongues fought for dominance him obviously winning. Your lips moved in sync and you felt as if you were on cloud nine. You made out on the dancefloor for what felt like hours until you felt your phone vibrate from the pocket in your dress. You pulled away making Tom giving you a confused look. You took out your phone to see Harrison was calling you. Your stomach dropped when you realized you just intensely made out with his best friend while he was in the place.

“I gotta take this” you squealed in a small panic terrified that he saw you and Tom. You answered the call once you got off the dance floor.

“Harrison are you okay,” you asked your heart beating out of your chest.

“Yeah I’m fine I was calling to see if you were okay” he responded. You let out the breath you were holding thanking god he didn’t see you and Tom. you felt your phone vibrate quickly looking down seeing a text from Willow saying she was exhausted and ready to leave when you were.

“Yeah, I’m fine, Willow and I are gonna head out, but you and Tom have fun okay” you insisted as you walked towards the exit.

“Sounds good, Tom and I will probs be out for a couple more hours, just let me know when you get back to the flat okay”

“Okay, See ya later” you finished hanging up. You texted Willow to meet you outside the club as you exited the front of the club. The cold air hit your body, and you started to process what happened. Yeah, it was wrong, but it felt so right. You couldn’t stop smiling. You turned to see Willow walking out the doors of the club the huge grin still on your face. Willow wiggled her eyebrows.

“Girl I haven’t seen you this happy since you met Jake Gyllenhaal what happened” she questioned.

“I kissed Tom” you squealed, and her eyes widened

“No fucking way” she gasped, but you just nodded. You both jumped up and down like two five-year-olds who got what they wanted for Christmas. “You need to tell me everything” she exclaimed.

“Okay my first question is was he a good kisser” she pressed.

“Oh my god yes, his lips may be thin, but holy shit that man can kiss, and the way his hands felt on my body I thought I was gonna pass out” you giggled and her face was filled with excitement for you.

In the uber, you explained how everything went down and the Uber driver probably thought you guys were crazy because you were both freaking out. Willow was the only person you ever told about your massive crush on Tom and shes “shipped it” since the beginning. You guys exited the uber stumbling up to your flat. You both plopped on the couch turning on the TV grabbing a snack. You both talked about your nights until you both knocked out the TV still playing.

***

The next morning you woke up on the couch and Willow was still fast asleep, but she was on the floor making you chuckle. You dragged yourself from the couch to the bathroom your head throbbing. You looked honestly horrible. Your makeup was smeared you were still wearing your clothes from last night. Your hair was knotted as well and you honestly looked insane. You popped and Advil and stepped into the shower. You washed all the makeup off your face your body relaxing as the hot water hit your body. The headache began to go away and then you remember what happened last night. Your closed eyes shot wide open. You made out with Tom. you felt excitement but also dread. Questions flooding your mind. What if he regrets it? What if he doesn’t even remember? What if it ruins our friendship? What if he tells Haz? Honestly, the thought of facing Tom made you so anxious you wanted to throw up and it wasn’t the hangover talking. You finished up in the shower and wrapped a town around your body. You exited the bathroom to see Tom who walked out of the guestroom. You stopped dead in your tracks. He looked hungover just like you. You were not ready to face him so instead of saying anything you darted to your bedroom closing the door. This was going to be a long day.

After getting dressed you walked out of your room to the kitchen to see Tom and Harrison making coffee. You avoided looking at Tom, but you for sure felt his eyes on you. Willow was still knocked out on the floor next to the couch, so you went over shaking her awake. She groaned sitting up rubbing her neck.

“I’m so fucking hungover” she groaned standing up to go to the bathroom.

“You feeling okay,” Harrison asked.

“Yeah, a killer headache, but yeah” you breathed. “I’m assuming your fine since you never get hungover you lucky bastard” you laughed.

“Yep I am totally fine, sucks you got the bad hangover gene” he joked making you laugh.

“Why did you leave so early,” Tom asked catching you off guard. You finally met his gaze but you quickly looked away.

“Willow and I were both tired” you mumbled as you sat down on the couch.

“Did you have fun at least” he probed. You knew he remembered which just made you more embarrassed because you were avoiding him, and you were going to continue to avoid him because talking to him about it freaked you out way too much.

“Uh yeah” you sighed. You heard the bathroom door open revealing a sick looking Willow.

“I think I drank too much yesterday” she groaned. You lifted yourself from the couch going to Willow.

“Haz, I’m gonna take her out for burgers across the street, so I’ll be back later” you declared. You felt Toms eyes on you again and you looked up for a split second your eyes meeting his, and he gave you the “we need to talk look”, but you looked down ignoring it. “Willow I’m just gonna grab my shoes and we can go” She nodded and walked towards the couch to gather her belongings. You made your way to your room and once you walked through the door you went to your closet. Right as you turned around you heard your door close. You whipped around to see Tom.

“We need to talk about last night” he pressed.

“What about last night” you shrugged trying to act oblivious. You felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest. Your stomach was doing backflips and you were damn near about to go into full panic mode.

“The kiss Y/n, I know you remember” he scoffed. Walking closer to you.

“Oh that,” you said dumbfounded.

“Harrison can’t know, It was a mistake we were both drunk” he addressed making your heart sink. That hurt. You felt your heartbreak, and you felt tears begin to form in your eyes, but for your sake, you took a deep breath trying to act like you were fine. You were trying to figure out how to as if the kiss meant nothing, but it honestly meant so much.

“Y-yeah” you agreed looking down at your feet. Your nails dug into your palms and you bit your inner cheek to try and hold yourself together.

“I’m glad we’re on the same page” he confided. You didn’t say a word though. You were scared that if you did you would break. So you simply slid your shoes on him and pushed past him not even looking at him. You walked right out the door Willow following you most likely confused.

“You okay” she questioned looking at you with concern, and you just broke down the tears you were holding back finally flowing down your face.

“He said all of it was a mistake” you whimpered.

“Aw honey I’m so sorry” she offered wrapping her arms around you. You hugged her back crying in her arms for a minute, but you pulled away wiping your eyes. You weren’t going to let him hurt you like this. It was one kiss, and you weren’t going to let it ruin your life.

***

It had been about a week since the Tom innocent, and as much as you wanted to say that you were fine you were heartbroken. You had completely avoided Tom the whole week, which he definitely noticed because he texted you asking you if you were alright, and you just didn’t respond. Unfortunately today you were going to have to see him because the Hollands were throwing a pool party which you had already agreed to go to.

“Y/N we gotta go or we’re gonna be late” Harrison called,

“Coming” you yelled back as you grabbed towel slinging it over your shoulder. You walked out of your bedroom meeting Harrison in the kitchen.

“Are you okay, and please be honest with me because you’ve been acting weird all week” he acknowledged hia eyes soft. You gave him a soft smile and wrapped your arms around him.

“I’m okay just having a rough week, thank you for caring” you whispered. You backed away from the hug. Harrison gave you an endearing smile that you returned and then you were off to the Holland residence where you would spend the whole afternoon attempting to avoid Tom.

***

When you reached the Holland house you were greeted by Sam. You and the twins were pretty good friends. You were the same age as him and you guys had attended the same school. You gave Sam a small hug and then he led you to the backyard.

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever Y/n how have you been,” he asked curiously.

“uh, pretty good, what about you, anything new with you” you queried.

“Nah just the same old boring stuff as usual” he laughed as you walked towards the pool. You saw Paddy swimming in the water. His eyes lit up when he saw you. You were Paddys babysitter because the boys were never home, and you didn’t go out to the clubs much. Paddy got out of the pool running up to you giving you a big hug making you yelp.

“Paddy you’re gonna get my clothes all wet” you exclaimed trying to pry him off, but he just giggled now trying to get you as wet as possible.

“Will you come swimming with me” he beamed as he started to shiver.

“Of course just let me get my stuff together and I’ll come swim” you laughed he smiled wide then ran back into the pool jumping in. You found an empty spot and placed your belongings down laying your towel out on the lawn chair. You peeled your shirt off and pulled your shorts down. You then turned towards the house to see Tom’s eyes on you. He was yet again checking you out, and it pissed you off. You didn’t understand what he was playing at. You shook your annoyance off and headed towards the pool. There were a couple younger kids who were most likely paddys friends, and then Sam and some other people from your school in the pool. You entered the pool slowly the water cold against on your skin.

“Just jump in Y/n youll get used to it” Sam laughed.

“No way in hell am I jumping into this pool” you shivered, but then Sam grabbed your arm pulling you into the water with a small shriek. Your body hit the water and you felt the cold seep onto your whole body. You shot up from underwater shivering.

“Sam I hate you” you shrieked as you splashed him, but he just laughed.

Once you finally got used to the water you joined the game of Marco polo which then led to chicken fights. You were currently on Sam’s shoulders laughing your ass off because neither of you could stay steady. You were currently up against Harry and Paddy. Somehow Sam slipped making you both fall into the water. You both came up from underwater facing each other and you both burst out laughing falling into each other. You were pretty sure Sam was flirting with you. He was being extra touchy, and he kept complimenting you. You didn’t mind though, and as bad as it sounded you hoped Tom was watching. You hoped he was jealous. When you looked over at Tom he was watching, and his jaw was clenched as you began to flirt back with Sam. You felt bad because Sam was your friend, but making Tom jealous made you feel like you were on top of the world.

“Sam I’m gonna go to the bathroom real quick” you called as you pushed yourself out of the pool. You walked to your lawn chair grabbing your towel. You wrapped it around your body and entered the Holland home. You walked to the bathroom and did your business. You washed your hands then exited the bathroom to find Tom waiting outside the door.

“Why were you flirting with my brother” he pressed.

“Why do you care who I flirt with, you have no right to question who I flirt with” you sassed.

“I don’t care” he defended his jaw clenched.

“If you don’t care why did you ask” you provoked an eyebrow raised.

“I don’t know” he quipped his cheeks tinting red.

“Are you jealous”

“No” he replied extremely quick.

“I don’t believe you”

“I am not jealous” he defending moving closer towards you until you back hit the wall. He was so close to you, you could feel the heat radiating from his body. The tension in the air was thick. Your heart was beating out of your chest. You both stared at each other for what felt like age until Tom slammed his lips against yours making you squeal. Your eyes were wide open. You didn’t kiss back at first. After a couple of seconds, your eyes fluttered shut and your arms moved up his torso to wrap around his neck. His arms went from your waist moving over your bum to your thighs

“Jump” he mumbled against your lips, and you did as he said wrapping your legs around his waist pulling him as close as you could. Everything was moving fast. Tom’s hands began to fidget with the string of your bikini.

“Tom are you in here”

It was Harrison. You jumped out of his arms so fast scurrying to the bathroom shutting the door. Tom looked just as panicked as you. He pointed to the bathroom gesturing you to go in.

“Uh yeah, I went to go find one of the inflatables for the pool” he lied. You heard their voices get quieter until you couldn’t hear them anymore. You let out the breath you were holding. You dragged you back down the door going into a ball. You put your face into your hands wondering what the hell was going on. You were genuinely confused, because he said the kiss was a mistake, but then out of no where he kissed you again. Talk about mixed signals. You stood up rubing your temples. You walked out of the bathroom back outside. You sat on your lawn chair and watched Tom from across the backyard. Your eyes met his and he gave you a smirk. This man was going to be the death of you.

***

After the pool party, you headed back to the flat. Harrison had a date tonight so you would have the flat to yourself. You put a bag of popcorn in the microwave and turned the TV on. You looked at your DVDs seeing Spiderman homecoming on top of the stack. You didn’t want to watch it but you found yourself opening up the case and plopping the disc in the PlayStation. You heard the microwave go off and you strolled to the microwave dumping the bag of popcorn into a bowl. You shut the lights off and flopped onto the couch. You pressed the play button and the movie began. You sat there admiring Tom, thinking about what happened today. You wondered what would have happened if Harrison didn’t walk into the house. You were off in your head until you heard a knock at the door. You pushed yourself up and dragged yourself to the door. You looked through the peephole to see Tom. Your heart skipped a beat as you opened the door.

“Can I come in?” he asked his eyes pleading you to let him in.

“Sure, so what brings you here Harrison isn’t he-”

“I can’t get you out of my head. Ever since the night at the club, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. And this is so wrong I mean you are my best friend’s little sister, and if he were to find out I’m pretty sure he would kill me” he blurted leaving you speechless. You stood there your mouth agape as you tried to process what he was saying. “Can you please say something” he begged.

“I don’t know what to say” you gulped.

“I like you Y/n and not just as a friend” he expressed coming closer to you. He put his hand on your cheek and leaned into his touch.

“I like you too” you whispered. Tom let out a sigh of relief bowing his head. You then put your hands on his cheeks bringing his face up to look at yours. You smiled softly at him and then connected your lips. The kiss was sweet and slow. Tom’s hands fell to your waist pulling you close to him. The kiss began to get more desperate. Hands roaming each other’s bodies. You pulled him towards the couch, and he laid you on the couch and then hovered over you.

“I love that you’re watching my movie darling” He goated his lips from yours making you whine. You felt his lips fall to your neck sucking on it making you gasp and let out a moan.

“I can’t help that you are so attractive and your acting skills blow me away” You felt Tom smile against your neck.

“I’m pretty sure you’re the attractive one” he smirked. You pulled his head back to yours kissing him again. Your hands roamed his body sliding under his T-shirt. He then broke the kiss to pull it completely off. You gawked at his build body.

“Like what you see” he smirked making your face flush red. He dove back down to kiss your neck making you moan again. He then sat you up to remove your shirt as well. You usually would be insecure, but the way Tom looked at you made you dizzy. You were so in the moment that you missed the sound of your apartment door opening.

“What the fuck”

#tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland angst #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff #tom holland x osterfield!reader #marvel #marvel imagine #tom holland spiderman

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mousehole5000 · 4 years ago

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tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

#minors dni #reading this is weird its like wow this is pretty great actually im having a blast #and then there's these moments that are like...... hmmmm.#idk they havent been awful i just think theyre :/#still funny tho ill give it that #tgcf liveblog

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cybernightwanderer · 4 years ago

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How whats left of me faded away, and how my first christmas home became my last : - The day my mom died. - The concept of family finally ended for me. - And how “ it doesnt get any better”.

23rd December.

These past few months i have been on psiquiatric medical leave from work due to a very severe depression thanks to the amazing workplace enviroment that has now crippled me so deeply physically and mentally, more before.

Its funny how when i try my hardest to recover and get my life back, its becomes so clear its a fucking joke.

Begining of the year i managed to fight off my mom on the money she was forcing me to pay her, and i managed to pay less from what i was paying before, and due to these medical leaves and corona, i get very little support finnancialy. I managed to save up almost 1k, i was ready to start believinng i could fix up my life. However i still pay her what i have to monthly, half the bills, 50 euros for food that i may consume at the house, and i also buy my food and my own things like i always did.

My mom has the tendancy to force me to take borrowed money she lends me.

For example mid corona time, i had to have gum surgery due to an old tooth infection, wich turned out to be 3 tooths, and i took out 2, needless to say my mom helped me with half of the apointments, i payed the surgery ones but then i needed follow up apointments so i wouldnt lose 4 more teeth. Apointments i canceled right away , beause i didnt have any money, and my mom being the mom that she is i always refuse her “ loans “ due to her being worse than a fucking stereotipical loan shark that takes that money back with interest, but in mental health and sanity. However she kept squedueling the apointments without me knowing, then tell me 1 day early, then get mad at me because id tell her i had no money so i told her to cancel and not make apointments without my consent and knowledge. This to wich she responded with screams , name calling , telling me to cancel myself and the general griefing of : “OK fine ill never help u with anything again “ / “ ok fine i dont care anymore then “, “ what you are too good to take my money is that it? “ Then when i standed my ground , proceeding to treat me miserably for the following week, demanding me to do random chores, just for the sake of punishing me , leaving dirty dishes of her own food acumulating so she could force me to do them and threaten me with a beating if i didnt, or making me wash the bathroom everyday for no reason.

With all this mess, half the money i had saved up + using it on the apointments and paying her back right away at the end of the month the consultations i owed her. I was left with 400 bucks.

Wich later on were also spent in dentist urgency apointments, because i kept having infections, psiquiatrist apointments and medicine and a laywer for the work harrassement situation, and then and there, all my money was gone.

The situation goes by, im home , receiving basic support for the medical leave, i pay my share of the bills and i do my own thing, however depression has gotten worse, my attacks have gotten worse, and everything just feels like rock bottom here.

These last 2 months, ive been trying so hard... so hard to get back on my feet, i was taking my medicine, i was taking a languague course, i was going to the doctor. I was really, really trying. Its funny how hard i was trying, for the first time in my life i was really trying to believe it could get better.

My mom was even acting nice and it almost seemed like she was really supporting me and trying.

December 23. Me and my mom go the psiquiatrist apointment for him to avaluate my condition. For the first time the apointment wasnt so heavy, it didnt leave me so weary from it. I finally believed. By the end of the consultation my doctor asks my mom to make sure i dont go back to that work place, because it might have a huge take on my life. My mom turns to the doctor and says : “ I know she cant go back , but she cant be unemployed either.” And the doctor says : “ I know, but if she goes back it can make her worse, we cant let that happend, its damaging her“ ( meaning she could kill herself, due to the last apointments conversation ) On to wich my mother replied : “ Well i cant be providing for us both with my money “.

...

When we arrived at the car i asked her why she said that and what she meant by that. And i told her that i pay for my food and that i pay for the things i eat that she buys ( wich is not much ) and that i also pay for half the bills.

To wich she agressivly threatned me to shut up and started yelling right away and acting like a victim with her mild aneurism that happend quite a few years ago in wich she HAS BEEN FULLY HEALED AND PERFECT HEALTHY, but always uses as an excuse to dodge the discussion after demanding certain shit or just plain insulting me. After a lot of lying and name calling and even telling me that i eat her food and that i live off of her. Into wich i replied, i dont always eat your food , and theres a lot of times when i dont eat and you yell at me and treat me badly for not eating your food wich led me to just eat cereals for months everyday as all 3 meals or not even eating and skipping meals for being too afraid of making my own food in the kitchen.

And so on... And i asked her what she wanted from me. And after a long car fight and a lot of gaslighting, she finnaly admitted she just wanted more money “ because if all your friends pay normal rent , you should too “ ( meaning a 450 rent ).

And then i just gave up and told her ok, ill pay you a full rent and i will also never toutch your food again. She laughed and made fun of me. And said : like ur even gonna buy your own food, you always use my things. to wich i asked what things? Oh you use my shampoo and toilet paper. To wich then i replied, everytime i buy toiler paper for me, you just take it as your own, and i dont use your shampoo or body wash i buy my own and i have been buying my own. And she just kept fighting me on it saying i do...and i told her i dont, if i by any chance dont have shampo ill use body wash as shampoo or vice versa. She just wanted to be right, so i just told her, ill pay you anything you want, i just dont wanna fight anymore im tired. To wich then she just kept saying “ oh now ur just trowing a fit “ And i sayd to her, why me agreing to what u ask and calmly shutting up to not fight anymore , how is that trowing a fit? i just gave you what you wanted, you dont need to be angry anymore.

And she just kept going at it, trying to poke my nerves until i just completly yelled and when crazy. The she acted like a victim again.

I am so drained, i am so tired....

After that discussion it was just 10 minutes of silence. I made a decision. That woman is not my mother anymore.

She wants to be a landlord so bad, she will be one.

My mother has died.

After a few minutes almost home , she decides to turn the “ mother mode “ on, and goes like “ oh you have to go to the doctor blah blah lets get your medicine etc. And i just told her, no. Ill go to the doctor on my own means, and ill buy the medicine when i have money.

Obviously she completly dismissed what i sayd and tried to drive me to the doctor and the pharmacy. After a few NO’s , she went home.

I got home, i took care of my things and i sorted out my doctors paperwork, she tries to come into my room, and acting like a worried mother like : “ oh did you do this -- etc” ( what i was already doing ) and i just told her, to stop. That she doesnt get to “ talk to me about those things anymore, or about my buisness.

Shes not my mother anymore. She doesnt get to act like a mother do just order me around and controll me. She is just a landlord now.

A few hours later, shes wrapping up presents and asks me to do it and asks me for my gifts wrapping thingies, and i told her no. Immediatly got mad at me and kept trowing provocative comments. And i told her, i didnt want any xmas gift from her, and that i wouldnt be spending xmas with her.

She made that usual smirk she mades when she sees me upset.

fast forward, the next day.

24 December

---

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mononyann · 5 years ago

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a while back people requested that i share some of my headcanons for certain bnha characters, so here's some of the characters that i did

Shota Aizawa

- he absolutely has at LEAST 3 cats, he spoils the heck out of them too. that's why he's always eating those gel packs... he spends too much on his cats.

- he really does love his class. and we all know honey??? u haven't expelled any of them. ur soft for them ok.

- he likes to sleep with his cats bc he gets lonely at night... he will not admit it, but he likes having someone/something there :)

- he has reuccuring nightmares about the usj attack and how he could have failed to save his students

- has a very low alcohol tolerance and often ends up getting dragged back to his apartment by mic or midnight when they go out whilst he rambles and whines the entire time

- he hates crying and tries his best to keep his emotions held in, he's only cried in front of a select few people

- he tries not to let others opinions on him rule his life and tends to block it out if someone hates him

- he doesn't know it, but he is the entirety of class 1-a's dad.

- he really likes tea, and dislikes sweets

- as you would expect, he takes his coffee black

Hanta Sero

- he really likes kpop! he stans multiple groups and really wants to attend a concert

- though he seems really chill on the outside, he's actually quite sensitive and has some self confidence issues

- he loves being around people and finds that he gets his energy from being around those he loves

- definitely into e-boy fashion, and he is open about it

- pierced his own ears at 3 am and called kaminari crying about how he screwed it up

- he actually likes to draw a lot in his free time, it's very relaxing. he puts on some nice low-fi music and draws for hours

- he hasn't had many crushes in his life and doesn't find romance to be a big issue currently, but he's open to anything

- accidentally taped his hamster to the ceiling in 2nd grade, he didn't mean to and cried for hours (the hamster was ok)

Nemuri Kayama

- she is a BRO, she likes to crack a cold one open with the boys on the weekends

- she is bisexual and thinks everyone is beautiful in their own unique ways

- most likely talks shit about her coworkers to her classes

- she thinks children are adorable and loves them, often scaring them with her enthusiasm

- very touchy, she loves hugs and will probably not pass up a chance to use you as an armrest if she has the chance

- she secretly worries about aizawa a lot and is scared that he lets the past effect him too much

- did you guys know she has a cat?!

- i like to think she and mic are like... EPIC bros, she loves to paint his nails and do his hair while gossiping with him (aizawa would NEVER let her do this to him lmao)

- she isn't a mom, but finds the idea of having her own children very nice, for now having a cat will suffice

- she enjoys trying to make all might flustered, she thinks his reactions to things are always very cute and funny (it's all in good fun!)

- she's the mom friend! though she may seem very sexual, which she undoubtedly is, she is also very caring and has a very nuturing motherly personality, she's a lot more than just fanservice !!!!!

Todoroki Shoto

- completely oblivious when it comes to love... he doesn't even understand his own crushes

- "of course you can borrow my credit card uraraka" *pulls out endeavors card which he sneakily took*

- would be the person to tell a child that their pet guinea pig didn't go to heaven and be confused when they start sobbing... like "what... don't be honest?"

- allows his friends to huddle up to his warm side when they are cold

- is confused when people show him copious amounts of love and affection

- he would beat up anyone if they tried to do ANYTHING bad to midoriya

- he wants more friends. he really is enjoying meeting new people and having some new friends at ua!

- he gives really good hugs, he doesn't try to hug you too tight, but he doesn't half ass it either, very nice and warm

- he hates his scar. like. a lot. he wants to cover it up so bad but it just doesn't work. he's afraid it'll make other people scared of him.

Shinsou Hitoshi

- loves patd! and fall out boy, a brendon urie STAN

- loves to kiss his kitties on the forehead but dreads human interaction

- he loves to squish his cats' toebeans... he takes pictures of them and posts them to his secret cat social media acc

- he is gay but doesn't know how to feel about it and/or come out, he's really nervous and doesn't trust people to accept him

- he doesn't smile often but when he does it's the cutest thing ever

- he secretly really likes deku and kaminari and is hesitant about accepting their friendship, but appreciates the gestures a lot

- he suffers with social anxiety and doesn't really know how to make friends very well??? like, in middle school people were total dickbags to him so he kinda just closed himself off and decided he was gonna like... not make friends, but now that there's nice people around him he just kind of- doesn't know how

- this is actually canon! but he feels guilty about having to manipulate people when he uses his quirk, during the 4th school briefs book he feels guilty when he overhears midoriya and ojiro talking about him using his quirk during the sports festival, and he's like "i wish ojiro would say something rude about me to show he's angry so i wouldn't have to feel so guilty about this" since ojiro showed no ill feelings towards him

Izuku Midoriya

- "hold on I'll go get a blanket!" *opens closet* *thousands of all might figurines tumble out*

- watches cat vine compilations until 2 am, than freaks out when he realizes it is 2 am

- very good with children!

- used to be very self conscious about his freckles bc of bakugou insulting them; hid them with concealer for a while until someone told him they were beautiful

- loves his momma so muchhh he would do anything for her, he likes to surprise her with small favors to see her happy

- does not understand the concept of letting people handle their own problems

- stays after to class to offer his teachers help

- he has a lot of self doubts and is still struggling to this day to come to terms with the fact that he is worthy of having one for all

- he wants to learn how to cook for his mom and friends

Kyoka Jirou

- she is a lesbian!!!!! she has a crush on momo but is completely convinced that it's unrequited

- struggled with judgmental kids in middle school because of her sexual identity and style

- gets very easily flustered by anyone complimenting her

- that one person sitting at the back of the bus with their earbuds blasting full volume

- was a GOD at guitar hero

- acts like she's fed up with kaminari's (which she can be sometimes), but truly he's one of the people she can trust the most. she secretly appreciates the way he hypes up her talents and how he really helps her through the day sometimes!

- she loves heroes so much... when she was a little girl and didn't know what to do she'd ask herself "what would my favorite heroes do!?"

- she also secretly buys hero merch but hides it in fear of her being seen as sappy

Amajiki Tamaki

- would have trouble standing up for himself but if he sees ANYONE messing with mirio he WILL throw hands

- likes to watch bob ross videos when hes feeling anxious

- he once went to a butterfly museum with his parents and cried out of joy when one landed on his nose

- leaves food out for strays in his neighborhood, ends up attracting an entire hoard of animals.

- he can paint very nicely, he began to paint after he discovered bob ross

- mirio then saw his paintings and showed the entire class to tamaki's dismay, but everyone absolutely LOVED them!!!

- every day he becomes more and more capable and sure of himself, he is still very anxious, but he's learning to open up and embrace his talents <3

- he really loves to listen to music and any time he's not around others he'll probably have earbuds in, gently swaying back and forth to whatever he has on

- nejire loves to try out new hairstyles on him, and strangely enough, tamaki lets her, he loves it when people play with his hair

Shirakumo Oboro

- shares one collective braincell with mic

- that one person that brings EVERYONE valentine treats on valentines day at school

- most likely plays ding dong ditch

- *draws stick figure* "ah yes. just like van goh" (he cannot draw)

- hates to see his friends (and even random strangers upset) and will go out of his way to do dumb things to make them smile

- probably played soccer

- he's a massive flirt and likes to believe he will become a stereotypical anime protagonist with a massive harem

- he really wants to see aizawa come out of his shell more and tries his best to encourage him to see the best in everything

- he has most likely worn a schoolgirl uniform to class once

- he's very affectionate and loves to hug his friends (even if they don't want hugs), it's his way of showing he likes people

Hizashi Yamada

- he lives off of caffeine. he is a teacher, pro hero, and radio show host, im honestly not sure how he does it

- gives out stickers when students get the correct answer in class and has class parties when they are well behaved for the semester

- just like everyone else, he has his own turmoil as well, he likes to stay busy because it prevents him from having a lot of time to dwell on the past

- he gives really good hugs, and loves to feel the touch of others, it's very comforting to him

- was probably pretty troublesome when he was very young while he learned to get control of his quirk

- overall a really happy and excitable guy, he loves being the center of attention and if he can make people happy by being what he is, that's awesome!

- he shows his appreciation for people in odd ways, but he always means good, even if his wild antics can be a bit stressful lol

- he likes to sing a lot and does it a bunch when he's alone, he can also play a lot of instruments

- he can be very serious if needed, he does often put on a persona when he's present mic

- when he's hizashi (out of hero persona) he's even more of a dork than usual, very goofy, awkward and pouty. a manchild.

OK so I reached my image limit, if u guys wanna see the rest I might post some more later PLUS feel free to request some in my asks, I don't really know how all that stuff works bc I'm kinda new to Tumblr but ILL FIGURE IT OUT

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neopuff · 4 years ago

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hello, i hope you're having a good day!! i was wondering, do you have any tips for making amvs? like, what programmes you use, how you handle the timing, etc. thank you for all the fun edits you make!!

hi!! sorry for the delay in answering this, i just wanted to take the time to answer it thoroughly and i kept forgetting lol & thank you! i already typed this once and tumblr made it disappear so i apologize if anything i say comes out short ‘cause i’m just trying to remember all that i typed before lol

ok so ill just go through my general editing process in Vegas, i dont know any other program well enough to talk about it at length:

(disclaimer: this is just how i do it, i dont watch tutorials and my editing friends and i don’t watch each other edit often so i would assume that my way is very different from other ways you’ve probably seen! i might even do something in a very stupidly hard way, please feel free to tell me if theres an easier way to do anything lol)

1. Song: So skipping past the “choosing song and ship/character/show” theme, I’ll dive straight into CUTTING THE SONG! I’m not about that Editing The Entire Song life, and neither is most of the editing community anymore, so I cut it up into a shorter thing that I’m better equipped to edit to. I’m just using a random example but here I’ve taken this long ass song and turned it into this:

(the next step just kind of depends on my mood, or ill do both, doesnt matter)

2-A. Subclips: if im making a shorter video or a video where i’m not 100% super familiar with the footage, i will immediately start making subclips using the episodes ive already pulled into the project. if it’s a ship/character that i’ve edited before, i’ll just go to Import->Media from Project and import the subclips i made previously. either way, subclips are there!

2-B. Sheets: for ships that i know very well/have a lot of footage/im concerned about potentially repeating something, i will go to Google Sheets/Excel and take the lyrics im editing to and put them in column A, separating by pauses in the singing. then i put corresponding footage i think will go well in column B! im often not super specific because i know the beats are gonna be different than i remember, so i usually stick to referencing whole scenes instead of specifics moments. here’s an example:

3. Clip placement: Then I start placing clips down! Below is how I organize my timeline tho I know a lot of editors who put the music on top, this is just how I like it. I also keep a single muted audio layer in between for the video footage’s audio and then I’ll delete that layer when I’m done (or sometimes I don’t, it doesn’t really matter)

I think it’s good to hit the beats as much as possible, it makes for a more dynamic audio-visual experience! In general I try to make my videos so that, if I didn’t add any zooms or typography or coloring, it would still be a good amv. And don’t limit yourself to just one layer, you can have as many layers as you’d like and put clips on top of each other (cookie cutter/changing the layer to dodge or add or screen or whatever) is a good way to mix things up

when I zoom in you can see I’ve got some variety already in my transitions, I know I use that motion-blur-zoom a lot these days but I still try to mix it up and keep my brain invested

4. Typography: After all the clips have been placed (or most of the clips, ofc sometimes I’ll want to add more later) I move on to typography! I’m lazy so the first thing I’ll do it just put down unedited text where I think I’ll want it to go. It just helps me organize myself. Then I’ll pretty up the text afterwards.

Typography isn’t necessary for a good AMV, but really nice typography can really spruce things up. I’ve only very recently gotten confident in my text editing skills, and I just kept watching typography done by editors I really like until I figured out what they were doing. My recommendation is to just KEEP ADDING EFFECTS! Convolution kernel, gaussian blur, mask the text so it appears from angles that the transitions wouldn’t be able to do - of course there’s gotta be a limit for taste, but just add stuff until you like how it looks. Also changing the blending style of the text layer is good, dodge and difference are my go-tos for typography layers.

5. Transitions: I don’t go crazy with transitions, but it’s fun to mess around with them. You don’t want too many crazy/different transitions, you want them to match the mood of the song and the type of beat you’re hitting. I usually ensure that all similar beats in the song have the same transition type on them, bbbbbbut that’s cuz I’m overly obsessed with parallel structure. There’s plenty of fantastic AMVs where they just go ham and do whatever types of transitions they want to in each part of the song and they make it work just fine

(next step, once again, kind of depends on my mood lol)

6-A. Zooms: Time for zooms! I usually just use the pan/crop for zooming, but often I’ll incorporate Sapphire FX BlurMoCurves or NewBlue AutoPan, especially if I’m trying to zoom typography with the footage at the same rate. I try to keep my zooms short and slower, I mean obv it just depends on the song but yeah. There’s a lot of different ways to do zooms so I recommend experimenting and just playing around with different effects

6-B. Zooms...but different: Another way that I’ll do zooms which is definitely pretty different (but this is what I do for crossovers like 95% of the time because I am laaaaaaaaaaazy) is I’ll drag the project into a new project timeline and start editing it there. It’s similar to how After Effects works and it makes it easier to put effects overtop of multiple layers without having to pre-render anything.

So you can see I’ve just pulled in the .VEG file and popped it in the timeline! So this way I can add zooms and transitions without worrying about layers. And if I see a mistake I need to fix, I can just go back into the original .VEG file and edit it, and it’ll be edited when I come back here. So it’s much easier than pre-rendering or trying to do zooms on a lot of layers. To be clear tho, this doesn’t work well if you have a lot of fade transitions, it’s best for sharp transitions and it’s great when you’re using Sapphire FX BlurMoCurves a lot.

7. Overlays: After that I’ll add more typography (or if you didn’t add any earlier, you can add some here overtop of the new project file) that kind of goes on top of everything. And then I’ll add any overlays or objects or whatever else I wanna add! I’m not someone who uses a lot of backgrounds cuz I don’t have a background-creative-brain so I stick to simple overlays at the most.

8. Coloring!!! This is very sad but I only JUST learned a few weeks ago that you can add coloring/effects to your entire video with this button here, so in case anyone else hates watching tutorials as much as I do here’s where I’m talking about:

This shit would’ve made my life so much easier throughout the years lol But alas. Anyway so for coloring there are some effects that are popular for any colorings you’ll find on YT (but you can certainly just download some, Riverdale editors in particular share a lot of really great colorings but you’ll find them anywhere in the live action editing community):

Channel Blend, Color Curves, Color Blend, Color Balance, Convolution Kernel (best for live action footage or footage that isnt very crisp), Color Corrector Secondary

These are all just fun to mess with. Channel Blend in particular is something of a mystery for me, I haven’t studied it fully to understand what I’m doing so I mostly just mess with it randomly until I like what I see lol

9. Render time! First render, anyway. Usually there’ll be some random problem in the footage or something and I’ll have to either go back into the project and fix it OR if I’m feeling particularly sour (or maybe if I’ve rendered like 3-4 times already) I will just take the finished render and manually remove any errors, stretching out the good footage to cover my tracks. You’d be surprised how often I end up doing that lol

And then it’s good to post! I primarily render as .WMV but I also go for .MP4s every once in a while. If I want to upload it to Twitter I’ll do an .MP4 but it’s a new thing for me so I’m still stuck on .WMV mostly.

Anyway I hope this answered your question at least a little bit, I can go into more detail about certain parts of this if you’d like!

#anon asks #carro answers #sony vegas #magix vegas #editing #long post

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dolphin-enthusiast · 4 years ago

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hello there fragolina!! 💌🍓✨ mamma mia, today was very hard, exhausting really 😞 it does get very tiring trying to fight off physical pain and keep my mind in check,, oh well, i just have to hold on until better things come!! that being said, i hope you are healthy both physically and mentally, and if you aren't, remember that it's okay to not be okay love 💗 (1/8?)

"i've been alone for most of the day, since everyone else in my house have been so busy,, especially since i have to rest because of the illness stuff,, it sucks not being around people, even if i'm an introvert! i did eventually find ways to keep myself occupied, like embroidery and cooking and music!! 🌺 (2/8)

i also finally ate a proper meal today!! it was really good and i felt good about myself afterwards!! i also got to watch a show during it,, one my older brother introduced me to, it's called the Walking Dead and it's a very well-done apocalyptic show,, which also tends to get super gory so i flinch at parts hehe 😅 (3/8)

i got to play some minecraft again today, but it was a little unnerving since some random stranger kept blowing up my phone while trying to flirt with me,, needless to say, waifu bro threatened him i think, and then i could play in peace!! 💫 (4/8)

sadly my night is ending on a sour note, and for a dumb reason too, my mom fixed me some dessert, but i felt very guilty eating it since all these thoughts popped in my mind about insecurities and such,, being in such a low point feels horrible, but i know i can get through it since i get to come back here everyday and cheer myself up ❤❤❤ and quinn seems to have revealed my torture dancing abilities, no? well then, of course i'll torture dance with you at the wedding darling 💞 (5/8)

ahhhh, i really have no clue what this writing even is, i guess i just wanted to share some small achievements of mine,, i know it's quite stupid, but i'm a little proud of myself for being able to get simple tasks done haha,, i hope things do perk up soon so i can provide more happiness for everyone!! that is my goal after all! (6/8)

so goodnight deary, i'll see you tomorrow 💕 and hey, try and get at least a tiny bit of sleep for me,, it can be really difficult, bit if i've learned anything through the rare bouts of sleepless nights, every bit counts! (7/8)

(to those who are struggling like i am currently, remember that i love you so much 💓) - love always and forever, waifu anon xoxo 🌹🌙 ps: don't worry my lovely morgy, i like to listen to some more aggressive music too!! my taste is all over the place,, from the classics to punk rock (and even, very rarely, certain rap) but if it means laying down and relaxing to hardcore music, then i'll enjoy it with you either way hehe 💘 (8/8)"

Darling its such a shame ur feeling like this but just remember none of it is real, all the anxieties are in ur head and whilst it succs majorly none of it is acc true and ur body is fine just the way it is. Once more i have no idea how to advice even though im no stranger to this type of problems but try to properly eat and if there is some dessert then eat just a little if u feel like thats better

U need not be embaraased about sharing these with us since we very much also are proud of u and ur little victories. May u get well soon from the physical pain as well smh

But i should mention im gonna fly over to america and kick everyone that tries flirting with u like that (and if he aint in america imma track him down too) aha luckily ur brother took care of that for me🤡👊 also i havent seen walking dead properly, only bits and pieces and tbh it doesnt interest me too much simply bc the apocalyptic genre doesnt appeal to me but hey maybe i could watch it with u someday nonetheless haha jk u n l e s s 👁️😳

Also introvert gang gang although im used to loneliness and dont mind it at all giving that im basically alone 25/8 but hopefully the clown army will remove that feeling for u shdhd im also not surprised that u can do emboridery too like what can this girl NOT do lets b real 🤪🤪🤪

And one more thing i couldnt b more happy to hear that u listen to the same music i do too...it really do b THE goal to just chill together whilst listening to aggressive rock music hfbdbduduhsjd

#lemme just say....we gon torture dance together @ the wedding and its gonna b E P I K #the confessional

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reeree1500 · 6 years ago

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The Return-Part 4

Okay y'all here's Part 4. OMG I cannot believe the amount of love that this story has gotten😍 it truly warms my heart, that an idea I had a while ago and have now just started writing has been loved by so many of you:) And with that lets get on to the storyyyy

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 part 8 part 9

Taglist: @yanii-the-hippie @oceans-daughter-3 @peaceisadirtyword @laketaj24 @camatsuru @amy8220 @cutegyrl927 @cindy-exo @cainismyname @affection-rabbit @ragnarssonsbitch @mel0nch0ly @wuxiesalt

Disclaimer: My sucky ass writing as always:) Some slight insinuation of incest; Fluff (an attempt anyway); And bad grammar and spelling (sorryyyy); Heart palpitations according to @yanii-the-hippie 😂 Hope you all enjoy☺️

Your POV

My head hurts so much that I feel as if I've just been hit by a carriage. The sounds of arguing around me do not help the situation at all. So I try to not focus on the pain or the voices around me that won't subside and remember what happened. Images of Mira surface in my mind. Her corpse on the floor and the death rune carved into her back. My best friend and most trusted subject was killed because of me. I can't help but wince at the realization that I will never be rid of the death and chaos that I bring everywhere with me.

Fluttering my eyes open, my eyes wander looking for the source of those voices. As I begin to stand up from the very comfortable bed, I scan the room trying to find any trace of the people who were in here earlier. My eyes land on a pile of shirts neatly placed on the table. Walking towards them I come to notice that Im not in my dress anymore, but in what's seems to be a mans shirt. “Nice pair of legs you got there (y/n), wanna trade with me for a while?” At the sound of Ivars voice, I shriek and turn around whilst trying to pull down the shirt that is covering my body. “Ivar what the hell!” At the sound of my screaming Ivar just walks closer to me with a smirk gracing his perfect face. “W..what are you doing?!?!” His hands grasp onto mine and all I can do at that moment is stare back at him with my eyes and mouth open wide in shock. “You're gonna ruin my shirt if you continue to pull it down. Plus, you don't want me to see your breasts now do you?” At that, all the blood from my body rushes to my face. Turning me as red as an apple.

Ivar grabs my face in his hands and his eyes scan over it. “I know we’ve just met. And its probably really wrong for me to feel what I‘m feeling, considering you're my sister. But, when you were unconscious it was probably the hardest thing I have gone through so far in my life. Not knowing if you would wake up was a nightmare that I could not wake up from.” Ivar says with an exasperated sigh. “Ivar....” I begin to say, but am soon interrupted by his lips placed on mine. I know I shouldn't reciprocate his feelings towards me or his kiss for that matter. But, the fact of the matter is that even in this short amount of time, this man has made feel things that I have not felt in my whole life. This man however is my brother and that is something that will not change. Soon the warmth of his soft and plump lips leave mine. Before I can say something about how inappropriate that was, Ivar is already walking towards the door. You know for a cripple he’s fairly fast.

“You know (y/n) I’m so excited for what's in store in our future.” He says as he reaches the door. Rearing his head to where I still stand in utter shock of what just transpired seconds ago. “Especially, since we now share a room.” At that Ivar winks at me and leaves the room, with that smirk on his face. Once the door is closed my legs give out from underneath me. “Lord what have I just gotten myself into. It is wrong for me to have these sort of thoughts and feelings for my brother. Please give me the strength necessary in order to get through this.” As I look up and close my eyes I can only beg that he hears my prayer and somehow gives me the power to get through this. But knowing the almighty, something will happen.

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As the weeks went on by, we had buried Mira the Christian way. Although nearly no one shared my beliefs, it felt nice to be able to have Mira been given the respect she deserved. People had brought flowers and different types of gifts to me in order show me their condolences. On the outside I had to be strong and show them that whoever did this had not gotten to me. However, my family knew all too well the toll it took on me. Especially Ivar, who would hold me at night and whisper sweet nothings into my ear when I had the recurring nightmare of that night. The raid that was supposed to occur after the festival was cancelled. I had expected many people to be upset at the fact that it was. But what I saw was a community come together for someone they did not know. And that is what I missed the most about Kattegat. The people. My people.

Ragnar, Bjorn, and Ubbe had decided to lead an investigation into who had murdered Mira. So far they had gotten a couple of leads, but nothing that would certainly pinpoint who the culprit was. In his worry my father had decided to teach me how to fight, so that I would be able to defend myself if it came down to it. He knew that this was a personal attack on me. And a personal attack on a son or daughter of Ragnar Lothbrok was an attack on him too. “Come on my beautiful sister, we have some more training to do.” I can hear Hvitserk say as he comes up from behind me. “Is that really necessary Hvitty? We trained yesterday!” On the weeks that went by I could say that Hvitty and I got really close. Closer than probably me and Ivar are. After the kiss with Ivar, I had tried to put as much distance between myself and him. What we had done was wrong and a sin. And I could not allow myself to give in to such temptations.

However, that doesn't mean that Ivar still didn’t try to get closer to me. Every chance he got I var would hold my hand or hug me from behind. I knew that people where beginning to get the wrong idea, as I had caught Margrethe talking about how “close” we were for siblings. As soon as I heard that I began to make sure to only talk or look at Ivar if necessary. Waking me up from my thoughts Hvitserk takes my hand and leads me out of the hall. “Im coming. Im coming. Calm down!” I cannot help but contain my laugh at Hvitserk’s desire to want to train with me. Its probably the cutest thing I have ever seen. “You look like a child anxious to play with a brand new toy, Hvitty.” At that Hvitserk lets out a chuckle. “Only of you're the brand new toy and I get to play with you everyday.” he winks at me as he says this. “Come on you're distracting me, let’s get to work. Legs shoulder width apart and make sure you have good balance...”

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Bjorn POV

“We must have gotten somewhere by now! I want whoever is responsible dead!” my father screams at Ubbe and I. “Father, we've searched through and through, but there are no certain leads! Its a he said she said situation thus far!” Ubbe yells back at him. “Do not tell me what I already know, boy! I just cannot help but feel useless and like I am not able to protect my own. We all know that that was supposed to be your sister dead, not that poor girl.” at that he trails off. My father has lost way too much over the years. Many friends have come and gone. But the way we buried Mira, could only remind him of his best friend Athelstan. The Christian priest that changed his life (and mine believe it or not) for the better. He was murdered too, and that has always been a constant reminder to him of someone he could not save.

“What I think that we should be doing instead of arguing is perhaps, finding someone who is good at unmasking people. Since none of us can seem to find who it could be.” I tell them both, getting tired of their back and forth arguing. “And who would you suggest Bjorn. No one can know that (y/n) is here, besides the people of Kattegat. Our enemies will know how to get us. Hell one of them probably was behind this!” my father reciprocates. “I think we all know who I’m talking about. Im just wondering if you'll be able to reel in and control that bitch of yours, when she gets here. Since I’ve already sent word to her.” I bark back at my father. I don't know if its because im sick of him treating me as if ill never be good enough. Or because (y/n)’s life is on the line, but I had never found the courage to stand up to my father, until now. At my words my father becomes silent. It might the loads of ale Ive had today, but I swear that I can see what seems to be pride in his eyes. “How long?” “One day’s ride” It is then that my father shouts to the thralls...

“Prepare the great Hall! The Queen is coming home!”

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Your POV

As the hours went by and my training had somewhat gotten better, I pleaded with Hvitserk to do something else. “Okay!Okay! We’ll stop training! But what else do you want to do?” Hvitserk's says shielding his sword. “I don't know, back in Frankia Uncle Rollo used to take me to the lake and taught me how to swim. Is there a lake nearby?” At that Hvitserk looks at me like I‘ve grown horns and a huge smile breaks out. “Come on, let’s eat quickly and then I have somewhere I wanna take you!” Rushing towards me Hvitserk grabs my hand and we quickly run off towards the great hall. Once we both quickly swallow our food, we head to the stables. There we find non other than Ivar in what seems to be him being pleasured by a thrall.

“Oh, Im so sorry. We didn't mean to intrude.” I say whilst quickly turning around. “Awww you're so cute (y/n), you’ve never seen or been pleasured before?!?!? Is that why you're as red as a tomato right now?” Hvitserk chuckles at me while trying to pry my hands away from my face. “Shut upppp!! Hvitty, get the horse and lets goooo!!” I chuckle nervously at him. “Its ok (y/n), you should take notes from Margrethe here. Who knows you might have to use them some day.” Ivar manages to say through his... compromising position. “Well Ivar, (y/n) and I are gonna go on a little adventure. Don't wait up...” At that Hvitserk grabs the reins on the horse and passes them on to me. “You know how to ride (y/n)?.” “Of course, Hvitty. Its literally my favourite thing to do.” “I’m glad to hear that. Now lets go!” And with that Hvitserk and I were off to God knows where. But one thing I knew for sure was that if Hvitserk was involved, we were sure to have a good time.

Bjorn POV

Soon the day had gone by and it was just a matter of time before my mother was here. You could hear a pin drop in the great hall. The anxiousness that lingered in the air was so thick that you could probably cut it with a knife. My father could not stop bouncing his leg, some thing he did when he too was nervous or didn't know the outcome of certain events. My head quickly towards the doors when I heard the neighing and hooves of the horses. At that we all stood up and thats when both Ubbe and I noticed we were missing certain people. “Ivar, where's (y/n) and Hvitserk? They're supposed to be here or did you not tell them that we would have company tonight?” I whisper at him trying to not get noticed by father or Aslaug. “Probably fucking somewhere. You know they've gotten pretty close these past few weeks I wouldn't put it past them.” At that I just look at him shocked. “Are you sure it’s just him Ivar? Don't act like I haven’t caught you staring at our sister when she's taking bath or when she's walking around the market.” Sigurd chimes in. “Whatever we will resume this conversation after this. But send someone to get those two here. NOW!”

When I turn back I am able to see my father already walking towards the door with the family behind him. Making my way outside I catch a glimpse of my mother on horseback. The most beautiful woman to grace the earth and the most skilled in combat. She taught me everything I know and for that I could never thank her enough. Behind me came up my wife Torvi, I smile down at her and hold her hand. She knows that I will do anything for my family, especially my mother and sister. And I will protect them at any cost. As my mother gets down from her horse I immediately go towards her and give her a hug. “You know that surprise I told you about in the letter. Well, I have an even better one now.” I say whilst chuckling in her ear. “My son, how many times do I need to tell you that Im not so easily surprised.” She laughs back at me. You don’t know what's in store mother...

After much due catching up with my mother. It’s time to get down to business. Father fills mother in about the fact that there has been a murder the night go the spring festival. My mother begins to ask questions on how we've conducted the investigation, to which Ubbe fills her in. I cant seem to pry my eyes away from the doors. Hoping that my sister and brother walk into the hall safely. It’s been hours and no one has heard or seen of them. “Bjorn, are you okay? You're not really focused on the matter at hand?” Torvi says while placing her hand on my knee. “Yeah...Yeah, Im fine just a little anxious thats all.” At that she leaves it alone. It is then that we hear some jugs fall over and loads of laughter. “Hvitty get upppp. Everyone is gonna knowwww....” I can hear the slurs of my younger sister. “Pfttt.. Like they careeee, were just having some funnnn....” Great these two are drunk of their asses and dropping shit everywhere. It is then that they both enter the hall. (Y/n) is carrying Hvitserk, in what seems to be a futile attempt to act normal. But when her eyes land on the blonde graying hair of our mother she drops Hvitserk and immediately you can see that she sobers up.

“Mama...”

At that my mother stops talking. And her eyes begin to well up with tears. “No. it cannot be. It’s the gods playing tricks on me.” My mother says whilst looking down, refusing to turn around. My father gets up from his chair and kneels beside my mother. “It is true. She is here, come with me. I promise you she will not be taken from you again.” My father’s voice cracks at the end. As I truant where my sister stands I can see the pan and suffering coursing through her body. Her eyes show a small child that was ripped from her safe place and placed in an evil and hungry world, that only wanted to make her suffer. As my mother and father stand up I catch a glimpse of Aslaug and her stone cold face. That is filled with rage and what seems to be a predatory glare towards my sister. Trying to put it to rest and not say anything, I turn towards my parents. My father holds may mother in his arms as to keep her from falling over. “ My baby girl. Tell me that this was not dream that Ive had for the past 6 years and that you're actually here with me.” My mother manages to say through her tears. But,(y/n) is barely able to get anything out through her sobs. All she does is run to where my mother and father stand and embraces them. At that they all fall to the floor in their embrace. Hvitserk is now standing beside me. Watching, with the rest of us the reunion of a mother with her child. In my daze of being focused on my parents and sister reuniting I fail to realize that both Torvi and Aslaug are missing......

Aslaug POV

“She should have been dead!!! What part of kill the insolent bastard child do you not understand!” I scream at Torvi. “You did not tell me that she was the daughter of Ragnar and Lagertha. Much less Bjorn's sister!” I had ordered Torvi to kill (y/n) so that what I had done that night many years ago, would not come back to haunt me or my family. I did this in order to protect them. That insolent child will only bring death with her. The death of our gods. And that is something I will not allow. I had faked to not have known about her existence all that time ago, but I cannot put past me the prophecy that was foretold by the volva. I will do anything in my power to make sure that she gets nowhere near my sons. For I rather die then see an era were Vikings and Christians alike are one people.... “When Helga and Floki get to the dock. Report back to me immediately and tell Floki that he has an unfinished job from 6 years ago.” As I stare at my husband and his so called “family” I cannot help, but get a bad feeling about this.

That Christian child will pay for coming between my family....

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