#ITS JUST . I USUALLY LOOK AT ART OF HIM LIKE; EVERY DAY (hashtag not gay) BUT I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO WHILE AVOIDING SPOILERS SO. WELL….!

[lem-argentum]

logically….. when my xiv playtime runs out……. i could use that break to start rebirth……. but you see…….. there’s a guy in that game……….. who i really don’t want to be thinking about…………,,,,,,.,

[breaking-up-with-cockles]

Hi! I don't know why i have the same feeling :/ what do you think made them break up again if they did?

Hi anon! So sorry Itook forever getting to this but I kept holding it off hoping that somethingwould change with them or that I misread things and then I hopefully wouldn’t have to get into this. I wasreally hoping that DC with Darius would help too but nope. Still notfeeling good about them which makes me a little worried for theirpanel in Hawaii. Dude, this suuucks.

But ifI had to make a guess, I would say it’s a time/sacrifice thing(mainlybecauseI really don’t want it to be an infidelity thing again so I’ve been willfully avoiding that possibility rn). Mishais a superbusyguy, even more so in the summer withGISHWHES andespecially nowsavingthe world inthis dangerous dumbassTrump era. PlusMisha wasn’t filming much with Jensen those first few episodes ofseason 13, somaybeJensenwas feeling ignored or unimportant to Misha. Maybe hewasn’t going up to Van to see Jensen on his days off like he didearlierthis year duringthesecond half of season 12. At SDCC Misha did say he spent most of hisdays off fromwork onset, but that may have been because bothJensen and Mishawere still recovering andrebuilding fromthe breakup and making every effort to make it work. So maybe nowwith less Misha on set visiting him, Jensen was feeling slighted orignored or taken for granted, if that makes any sense. Maybe Mishaover extended himself and his relationship with Jensen sufferedbecause of it.

Inan earlier horribly rambly post of mine,I threw out a half-baked idea that maybe Misha was originallysupposed to go to ACL with him, but then he backed out and thatreallyupset Jensen. Misha didn’t tweet much that weekend but we know hewas in LA because an editor for SPN tweeted a pic of him in LA with othercrew members. Did Misha have something else to do in LA that he choseto do instead of attending ACL with Jensen? Maybe helping with the wild fire artinstallation that went up recently?Thenagain that is based on nothing so…The point of my theory is that Misha might be choosing other things over Jensen.

So ACL  weekendhappened but that following Monday on Oct 16th, Danneelposted a powerful #metoo vid on instagram and Jensen tweeted support.And Misha didn’t retweet or respond to any of their SM posts whichis VERY weird considering Alyssa Milano started the hashtag if I’mnot mistaken. He did retweet her as well as a Kripke tweet but whywasn’t he responding to Jensen and Danneel’s posts? Especially ifthey are as close as I think and J2M say they are. It’s odd.

That week followingACL weekend, Jensen also got his tattoo. Not a peep from Misha. Nothing! According to a fan’s report at Nola, it was a last minute decision and bigger than expected. So if cockles did break up, was Jensen inemotional mind letting his mood dictate his behaviour when he got the tat? Maybe Jensenand Misha talked about getting tattoos or maybe discussedjust how incredibly hot they would look with them?  YUM comes to mind. I mean seriously, how could Misha not respond at all. Even JDM responded. 

Or maybe Jensen’supset because they were trying to integrate Misha more into Jensen’sfamily and Misha was supposed to attend Gino’s (Danneel’s brother) wedding on Oct 21 but maybe Misha had to cancel that. Remember whenJensen’s gay aunt tweeted Misha in 2016 asking him if he was still in Italy so they could meet up?  Well I don’t thinkit happened but I think it shows that Misha and Jensen are close andimportant enough to each other that his aunts would want to hang outwith Misha in Italy without Jensen there. These aunts were at thewedding and are also really close to both Jensen andDanneel. Danneel even posted about them right after the wedding. Now Iadmit I’m reaching here but still family is important to both of them. Has Misha even met the twins?

Oh! but that Fridaythe 20th before Gino’s wedding, Misha tweeted his bluedance adventure with Philip at the Amazon HQ in Seattle.  It waskind of a weird tweet because why? It’s basically Misha flirtingwith Jensen’s doppelganger. Was he trying to make Jensen jealous, which is not very hard to do? Strangely enough though, Misha’s tweet before thisPhillip one was a weird #TBT tweet that referenced a tweet from whenthey were broken up last year. It was a weird tweet last year and itwas a weird tweet this year too. It’s weird imo because most of his tweets have been political or SPN related with a few involving his kids but then there is this random pointless tweet.

Fuck my chronologyis shit and confusing, so sorry. But after the seasonal and jjealousy tweets and after theSaturday wedding, at the very end of the weekend that Sunday night,Danneel posted a really cool video of Stevie Wonder taking a kneewhich was something that Misha also supported and I believe would normally have been interested in. Its just very ooc forMisha not to tweet about it or even retweet it when it’s aboutsomething important like civil rights and BLM, when that is basically what his social media persona has become.

I can write more about this but honestly metas or anything where I need toexplain and organize my thoughts usually don’t end well for anyone. This post, case in point. One more quicknote though. I’ll just say that I really thought Mary Oliver’s poem Misharecently recited and his “Suddenly” poem where he wrote about finding the beautyin the broken and the small was actually a little bit about Jensen.Honestly I suck at interpreting poetry so I’m probably way off but I thought it might relate to Misha’s “I wishfor this” dandelion story, which imo was basically about him beingpreoccupied and not being present and in the moment for his kids, notfully appreciating those precious tiny but fleeting moments with them and the oneshe love. So basically stopping to smell the roses or in Misha's case, slowing down to blow the dandelions. His kids, particularly Maison, were just so happy tobe with him and wished for more of it and maybe that’s Jensen too? Anyways, I was hoping thatmaybe those poems were Misha’s attempts at reconciling with Jensen.Who knows? 

I also thought Misha’s SPN night tweet about microbrewing misha’s or craft cloning was for Jensen too. [x]

Especially because according to instagram, Jensen visited a local Van brewery company that same night. [x]

I was even hopeful that Misha went with him but there was no mention of him and things still looked pretty chilly between the two at the DC con. 

I hope I sort of answered your question, anon. I don’t really know any more than anyone else but since I am convinced that they do have a history and I think I know what some of that history is, that does color my interpretations, so I’m sorry if this is confusing and random.  I’m just trying to put things together and make sense of this mess like everyone else. 

 What about you? You got any ideas or theories?