#ITLL BE OK FIREFLY
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#i was supposed to spend the last 2 days prepping and relaxing for the start of this big project tomorrow#but ive spent thr last 2 days frantically coding as fast as i could and focusing v hard to get a lot of bullshit done#and ive fixed things since yesterday. the changes i had to make were too too bad bc the thing that went wrong was so fucking weird#but it should be okay by tomorrow. knock on wood. but this does mean ive done fuck all to prep for tomorrow#so we r winging it bby. ugh. just gotta fucking pray that everything goes ok. pls let nothing b broken and let everything seal properly 🙏#i was also supposed to meet with my boss today. probably for her to make sure i dont fuck up this project but apparently their safety hood#was having an emergency... whatever that means. so im sure shes having a week as well. and im free to fuck everything up for everyone#ugh. im so. theres a certain point in burning out where youre not really in pain anymore. you dont really feel anything all your joy and#hope dissolves away and u just exist to be useful. and i feel like its easier to maintain that than trying to b happy#i do not advise that bc its a fucking miserable. wasteful way to live but i dont really have time to try for anything better#god. i really hope my measurements friday dont take a full 8hrs. i dont know if i can handle that. literally i would have stay intensely#focused with my brain being Interrupted every 5min so i can manually record data points. its gonna b agony#so that fun. but maybe it wont. maybe itll be great and fun and ill have a wonderful time. seems unlikely but ya never kno#lets not think abt the fact that having to rush all this is preventing me from being able to do all thr other bullshit i need to get done#to prepare for the future. future? what future? hard to imagine from the bottom of this pit im digging myself#sigh. in a few months i can leave this place and never come back. soon but not soon enough#lol i was literally crying listening to cold play earlier bc idk thats the type of music my parents would put on at parties in summertime#so it evokes a v specific mood. which is i guess me hiding away from ppl at parties haha#back when i didnt have to worry abt things so much and i could just listen to the frogs chirping and watch the fireflies#oh god. now my boss is asking if i reached out for help tomorrow. no. lady i would rather drink bleach than have to direct an undergrad#tomorrow. its 10pm im fucking tired. just let me be sad. did i reach our for help? no my brain is on fire#tomorrow is gonna b a long day ugh#unrelated
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hey 25. i hope youre doing ok and im glad you decided to stay. i want you to know i care a lot about you and i know it can be hard to see the bright side in a room cobered in black but. even black rooms have accents. even space has its stars and even deep sea creatures occassionally see a light. itll be ok. im here for you and if needed, i can try and be your firefly in the pitch black night -quiz
quiz i'd fucking die for you
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21 Questions Meme
Rules: Answer 21 questions and then tag 21 people who you want to get to know better!
I was tagged in this by @thessalian
Nickname: November on here, and Pinkie irl
Zodiac: Sagittarius
Height: 5′8″ (5″7 and 3/4ths but 5″8 sounds better)
Last movie I saw: Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse it was AWESOME
Last thing googled: “Elephant Toothpaste”
Favorite musician: ok ok ok so its either Frank Turner or Seanan McGuire
Song stuck in my head: well, my sister is playing persona5 and i really like the velvet room theme (dig me some operatic vocals or whatever)
Other blogs: Well ive got my fanfiction promo blog, my quote blog, and my aesthetic blog (and the fourth none of you will ever find)
Do I get asks: never as many or as often as i’d like
How many followers?: 822 ive only had two new REAL people follow me in MONTHS the rest are bots ive had to block
Amount of sleep: 8 or 9 on the weekdays, but like 10 or 11 on weekends. a bitch could use a coma
Lucky Number: 9
What I’m wearing: Eeveelutions t-shirt (cuz i have to do laundry), jeans, r2d2 socks, and TWO jackets because i am Cold
Dream job: Nanny or housewife
Dream Trip: roadtrip around the US preferably in the spring so itll be warm. no place to be, no money restrictions. just me and my car.
Favorite food: im a white person. you can capture me with cheese. i really like cheese
Play an instrument: i do not tho i am an alto
Languages: English, broken spanish, and i can usually fake some german words.
Random Fact: i really love the halo games even though im TERRIBLE at shooters and have never played the game. i watched halo 1-4 on youtube, and watched my brother play Reach and ODST. ODST is my favorite for a lot of reasons. (half the cast of firefly VAing is only part of it) i really dig the silent and faceless protagonist, and the fact that its in Africa.
Describe yourself as aesthetic things: jar full of paper stars, three jackets on the same hook, colorful mismatched socks, multicolor fairy wings, glitter on the cheeks, chipped nailpolish, wearing yesterday’s eyeliner under today’s, beanies, rain on a sidewalk
i tag @downintheinternet, @livingthedragonlife, @badvvoman, @bigbryan, @theonlybrightowl, @wonderrbat, @thebigpalooka, and any more of my mutuals that want to
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for the crayola crayon asks: asparagus, cotton candy, freckle, wisteria, sky blue, tickle me pink, cornflower, freshly squeezed, firefly red (sorry i got carried away)
im sorry this has been sitting here for so long
Asparagus: What’s an unpopular opinion you have?
uh im ok with pineapple on pizza? its good
Cotton Candy: What is your favorite dessert?
i like any kind of dessert, any kind of food really, but i have a preference toward apple and lemon flavored anything
Freckle: Do you have any marks on your skin? How do you feel about them?
i have a couple scars, though they’re rather small. i have one on my toe from a door. im guessing stretch marks count. ive got hella. i dont really care about them though. its just another part of my body
Wisteria: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?
oof thats tough…uh probably the reckless optimism? its something ive been working on, trying to find the bright side of everything
Sky Blue: Where do you feel the most at home?
with my sister. it doesnt matter where i am, as long as im there with her, itll feel like home
Tickle Me Pink: How do you try to cheer others up when they’re sad?
different things really. i send them animal pictures and wholesome memes, but most of the time i offer to talk about stuff and try to just cheer em up that way.
Cornflower: What do you think about the most?
girls…my gf…
thats hard, i think about a lot of things, however thoughts about my friends and stuff pop up the most frequently
Freshly Squeezed: What excites you?
a lot of things! i get excited pretty easily, but if you want specifics, anything regarding my interests can probably get me excited
Firefly Red: What gives you purpose?
making at least one person smile every day. kinda sappy and probably dumb, but i want to make at least one person smile because the world can always use more smiles, more happiness
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@solantur
PFFF NERD 𓆏 (ALL THESE FROGS)
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