#IT'S NOT EVEN GOOD WRITING IM SO PISSED
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im convinced this author literally could not think of a way to make avery naturally choose jameson over grayson so she just decided to make grayson act completely out of character.
literally up until this explosion, grayson's whole thing is about protecting avery, and her saying she truly does feel safe with him. everything in this tiresome love triangle plot has pointed to grayson being the better option. im convinced the author either switched to jameson bc of fan feedback seeming to prefer him, or she always planned for jameson but accidentally wrote herself into a corner and had to ruin grayson's narrative appeal by having him just 🧍🧍🧍🧍 STAND THERE 🧍🧍🧍🧍 when avery falls into a coma from the explosion.
there is no logical explanation for him to have reacted like that given everything he's said and done for avery leading up to this moment.
this writing is so frustrating this is exactly why i hate love triangles
#spoilers#like MAJOR spoilers#the inheritance games#the hawthorne legacy#thinking out loud#IT'S NOT EVEN GOOD WRITING IM SO PISSED
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im kinda dealing w vesperia the same way i did w ff8 where im just sooooooo mad at the flop ending but give it 3 months and ill probably sing high praise for this game but as of rn i need to seeth......
#flip flopping between ohhh so refreshingly unconventional to Im Pissed Awfffff#i do love unconventional bullshit writing tho but i also wish it didnt. suck#but vespie at its core kinda flopped from the start w how the class dynamic within the party itself wasnt examinedst allskdn#cuz so much of what drives yuri forward is this like inclination to improve the lives of impoverished ppl bc he himself grew up in poverty#meanwhile his party members are like 3 tax leechers + a humble boy who lives in the blessing of a union + a dog#+ A PIRATE + an ecoterrorist#like omg everyone in vespie is doing some other thing what is going on#estelle is exploring autonomy and karol is exploring bravery and judith is finding a meaning to life and rita is learning friendship and#patty is. yeah and raven is being a bastard i mean is learning that maybe having morales is a good thing#meanwhile yuri is having some justice classism yaoi thing with flynn.#like guys focus. focus. What the hell is tying everyone together. what is this#its not even the power of friendship i mean it kinda is but also NOT?? REALLYYYY#vespieria#not a bad game but Yknowwww
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if i hear one more pro-ai take i fear i may start exploding people with my brain
#for legal reasons im not gonna explode anyone#but i am gonna be extremely pissed off#i think the thing that pisses me off the most about pro ai people is this sense of entitlement i see from a lot of people#like “oh well this person posted their art/writing/creativity online#so therefore the ai (and by extension me) is entitled to be able to use it”#like its not the same at all as looking at another creators work and getting inspired#or when youre learning how to shape your style#its just taking other people’s work and passing it off as your own#like i get it sometimes youre not as good as you want to be or the motivation isnt there and you just want your ideas out there NOW#but you know what you do then?#you. fucking. practice.#if you don’t care enough to put in the effort to actually make your ideas rather than stealing for other creatives?#then i dont care at all about what you “create”#(obviously im not shaming people for being unable to put in effort due to any multitude of reasons—such as disability lack of time etc)#but even then that doesnt mean you have to resort to stealing from other people#because thats what ai is. theft. simple as that.#generative ai just makes me so fucking angry#fuck ai#anti ai#anti ai art#stop ai#fuck ai art#down with ai#fuck ai everything#fuck ai writing#fuck ai all my homies hate ai
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raise your hands who else almost cried like a baby through jace and rhaenyras conversation :')
#poor boy#im glad they didnt just gloss over the fact that hes been struggling with that for pretty much all his life#im also glad hes angry bc i feel like rhae is having a strange arc this season#i domt hate it#but wheres the vengeance and fury from the s1 finale?#shes lost TWO children. her husband is AWOL and she lost Rhaenys and Meleys like???#as much as i love the rhaenicent i feel like it doesnt make much sense#idk i feel like s1 was much stronger#im enjoying s2 but the writing is def not as good as s1#they seem to have watered down these characters so much#its pissing me off#and i havent even read the book yet so this is not me being a book purist#this episode was really good honestly and addam ulf and hugh are really interesting characters#idk i want angry rhae#as much as i love calm rhae i feel like theyre makijg her seem incompetent???#which shes not?#idk just seems weird#house of the dragon#hotd#ace rambles
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i am. SO fucking tired of ppl trying to make "problematic" fiction out to being the same fucking thing as shit me and other csa survivors have gone through. how do yall not realize how fucking disrespectful it is to have our trauma watered down to be equal to some shit thats literally not even real ????? THEY ARE NOT THE SAME THING, ONE HAS AN ACTIVE REAL ABUSER AND REAL VICTIM, ONE IS A FAKE STORY ABOUT FAKE PEOPLE.
#there are ways to prevent minors from being groomed and that is MAKE SURE THEY HAVE ACCESS TO MANY ADULTS THEY CAN TURN TO#IF ONE OF THEM ENDS UP BEING FUCKED UP#ISOLATION IS A PREDATORS BEST FRIEND#IF YOU ISOLATE PEOPLE BASED ON THE FICTION THEY READ OR WRITE YOU ARE ONLY LEADING THEM TO MORE LIKELY DANGER#whether that be isolating them FROM people who read/write the ''bad'' stuff or isolating them BRCAUSE they read/write the ''bad'' stuff#do not assume just because someone likes darkfic that they are dangerous or someone that condemns darkfic that they are safe#people who loudly condemn things in public can (note: not always. but CAN) be more dangerous in private#you cant automatically trust people just because they insist theyre ''safe'' and ''one of the good ones unlike THOSE people''#trust and safety is something thats built and proven not just insisted upon!!!!#and note: i do NOT like this type of darkfic. its triggering.#but i know people who make it are not fucking hurting people by just making fiction in their own corners of the internet#csa tw#anti fanpol#ask to tag#im. so fucking. tired of this shit. i dont even want to be THINKING about this topic rn#but it pisses me off that ppl keep watering down shit me and others hsve gone through and i need to vent a little#discomfort is rising so ending this here to prevent my brain from ending in intrusive thought territory about my trauma
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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job
#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me#oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving#but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done#and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be#and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything#and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else#and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch#and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me#that i wont find an easier job than this one#well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else#by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think#which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free#and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok#i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god#but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face#and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus#anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore#but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh
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Anyways update i just didnt bother to post earlier:
fr God is good and the whole car crash my parents got into last week was so incredibly mild in terms of injuries!!!! worst was a bruised knee im pretty sure
ALSO-
*taps mic* HUG YOUR FREAKING LOVED ONES OR SO HELP ME!!!!!!!
#ALSO DO NOT READ THE TAGS IF YOURE HERE FOR A GOOD TIME!!!!#ENDED UP VENTING AGHHHHH- (<- amongus ref in 2024???? l+ratio) (no but seriously stay safe; im not sure if i should add a cw???)#no but like the cars themselves?#FOLDED-#ive seen photos of worse ones of course lol (ty internet <3)#but we´re all in agreement that if it had hit anywhere else at that speed it wouldve been BAD Bad-#like; severe injury to the leg at least; drivers door wouldve crumpled; thankfully it hit the tire mostly#our car got what seems to be the lesser damage and theyre still debating if it counts as total loss xd#also oh goshhhh#so i usually go and say goodbye to my dad when hes headed to work; i did it that day as usual; car was already halfway out the driveway#my dog also loves to go and she was already in the car#but my mom (taking my dad to work) said she´d need to stop by the store after dropping dad off; so she handed her back to me#last minute descision-#my dog is a small kinda elderly chihuahua and wouldve been on my mom´s lap when they crashed#no seatbelt for her obviously#she wouldve gotten injured so freaking bad if she was there ):#overall feels like we dodged a life altering accident by a hair#i wasnt even in it and im still shook hahaha#i always go say bye to dad if hes leaving for work no matter if im pissed off or sad or whatever#half out of habit; half bc i know anything could happen at any moment and id rather not have been too proud to say goodbye#dammit im crying now hahaha#saying again; everyones fine!!!!! please remember to hug your loved ones !!!!!!#shut up sheo#but oh gosh too many reminders of death as a constant recently#that happened about a week after a cousin died; i hadnt seen him in forever but his family went to our church growing up; he was my age#it was a dull and distant pain even then to hear the news but it still hurt; i didnt go to the funeral#did go to the one a couple days later tho; for a family member i truly didnt know; it was a car crash i think#a special kind of heartbreak from meeting his mom and seeing his kids running around#now that i realize it; as im writing this; i hadnt stopped to process just about anything hahaha#freaking sobbing at 9 in the morning smh!!!!!
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one of the kids at work never listens or does what he's told and we have like the same problems with him every day so the other staff all kind of hate him at this point so they'll yell at him for doing extremely minor shit and today he said "how come you're the only staff member who cares about me" and it made me really fucking sad but it's not like I can tell the grown adults I work with what to do so I just have no idea how to help the situation
#when i try to talk about it to other staff they dont care bc he pisses them off so theyre not willing to give him the benefit of the doubt#so hell just be joking around or minding his own business playing with something and theyll like scream at him#in a way that they dont do with the other kids. its noticeable and it bothers me because obviously he acts out when that happens#so it begins a horrible cycle and now im basically the only one he'll talk to and i feel like im always trying to defend him to staff#and i just dont know what to do because literally any time im not right there to intervene this happens#and i understand why he gets angry and defensive when they yell at him for doing normal ass shit#and then like today one of the kids was making fun of him for being poor and smelling like cigarettes#and he told me his moms an alcoholic and that none of the other staff even talked to the kid about it so i gave him (the bully) a write up#i just really really feel for him because i can tell he wants to do good. i often end up letting him hang out with me all day#but today one of the other staff yelled at him for it and i had to be like i literally told him he could stay with me bc of this#im still can't usually get him to do what he needs to do but im the only one who will explain to him why we ask him to do stuff#i know a lot of its like body autonomy so i try to give him as much as i can but sometimes its impossible when we have 40 kids#ugh#today was bad
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versions of booster gold made by people who obviously dont know much about booster can be so infuriating because they tend to depict him as stupid or as a joke and then people who only know him from these depictions in more popular media have a skewed impression of him
#and like in justice league unlimited#even when the whole thing is about him wanting to be treated seriously#while also still wanting fame and recognition#it feels like a regurgitation of a lot of what he goes through and learns in his first solo#but worse#the 'i thought you were green lantern' joke feels like a rip off of the people calling him buster joke#except the thing about the comics is that he was well known#and the conflict was that he was well known but since he did so much ads and sponsorships and corporate shit#and that he acted like an open book while telling people nothing about himself#led to a distrust with the general opinion on him#which led to interesting plotlines and shit#and sure his tagline is 'the greatest hero youve never heard of' but he has very much been heard of in universe#at least like orginally#anyway this whole thing could be applied to a lot of comic characters unfortunately#but im just pissed that i cant find like a show version of him that does him justice#i hope that whenever james gunn makes that booster gold show that he actually does booster some good#and keeps the og comics in mind#ugh i wish people writing characters should read at least a decent chunk of the characters source material#and other things with them that are properly characterised#anywho i should reread some of my favorite booster comics to make up for it
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HEALING CANCELLED I JUST FOUND OUT SHE LOCKED ME OUT OF HER PRIVATE INSTAGRAM
#BEYOND COMEDY. SHXBBDFBBEJXNEBXBEJDJENDNENDNSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ#like im literally in the middle of writing a diary entry abt how pissed off i am at her good lord i dont even know why i decided to check rn#i cannot stress enough how hysterical it is. well shes still following me on her public at least#so i guess i havent been blocked everywhere but this is so fucking funny. what was the final straw girl.#thots
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reentered my bsd phase might write a fic idk
#the lack of nendoroids for good characters seriously pisses me off#i dont want dazai i want RAMPO </3#WHY ARE THERE SO LITTLE RANPO ICONS#chuuya i luv u but ur ORANGE dude#u cant even tell my pfp is ranpo :(#ok nvm as im writing these tags i decided i cant give up the bokuto one hes my baby
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I'm gonna be a little quiet on here until after I start playing Dragon Age. I don't want to be spoiled and the urge to click on posts that have DA tags blacklisted is mounting. And just like with Inquisition, I want to go in totally blind.
#[static]#I can't wait to see what my friends and mutuals think. it's always so much fun to watch folks play new games together#I've seen a few reviews. but I ultimately want to decide for myself#I've already seen people bickering about really inane stuff just to have something to be negative about#and while there are incredibly valid criticisms of EA among other things ... the stuff I'm seeing -#- is typical fandom stuff that I don't want to touch with a 10 foot pole#it's kind of funny how much people can rattle on about a game that isn't out just because they want something new to complain about#and people are 100% allowed to have their opinions and feelings on if they thought a game was good or not but the stuff im talking about is#- like being mad at folks getting invested in characters or talking about how bad they know it's going to be even though they havent played#i think i just hate when people talk with such conviction about how other people should enjoy things that it pisses me off real bad#i saw a take on my for you page about how it's wrong of people to be writing fics about things that havent happened yet#because what if they're wrong and then theyve wasted their time and are gonna be ruinously upset. instant block lol#i thankfully dont see any of this on my dash ... usually just in the dragon age tags or on the for you page which I rarely frequent#just let people enjoy something without getting wound up about it not being the right way. it's just drama for drama's sake#but also feel free to hate it and hate it loudly! so long as you understand it's also ok for others to have a different opinion#it's just the super-online 'everyone is wrong but me' takes that leave me reeling
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ahhhhhh i remember why i dont read comics & books and watch movies as much as I should. Because they make me lose it
#i get suddenly hit with a tsunami of inspiration and an urgency to Make Something#but the urgency isn't about the process of making it's about I Have Stories To Present Too. I have to See Them Realized.#and that hit of urgency is obviously far too short lived to make anything. esp since it comes in a set with a feeling of 'wow this-#-thing was so great' that transforms into intensified perfectionism of No No What Im Doing Here Isnt Good. What Is This. Disgrace-#-to my idea AND to what inspired it AND to my self proclaimed status as an amateur storyteller#which turns into artblock. so like low chances that ill even get a singular good drawing made during this#and the multiple comic or script or whatever ideas that appear in my head during this are out of the question entirely#oh and all of this appears next to the normal feelings caused by a good story like attachment to the characters and having to process it-#-for a while and if its very good then even sometimes rarely i get the need to make fanart#so all of this combined just leads to me not being able to do anything for a while and feeling awful about it.#fun./sar#i wish i was a normal artist people here are so resilient and do stuff even though they dont want to or they DO want to#because idk they enjoy being pissed bcs of a thing not turning out right and they dont mind how tedious it can get-#-and they enjoy sacrificing hours&days&months of their lives without a guarantee that anyone will appreciate it accordingly and itll pay of#its probably the resilience though#im weak like a dried twig both mentally and physically#this sounds like i never enjoyed drawing&writing ever. and to clarify thats far from true. i frequently enjoy it#just never frequently enough and consistently enough to actually make something more 'worthwhile' or linear#it's like a wind that comes & goes that i have no control over.#i try to keep telling myself that in the past i struggled to make anything 'bigger'....& know i even made animatic shitposts#this sounds so stupid god. an animatic shitpost being an achievement.#its not an art skill achievement its a fighting tooth and nail with my own self to actually finish it because its a struggle almost every-#-time achievement#what im saying is im trying to tell myself that i already improved. im doing more than i could have done in the past.#even if the process is so slow and i dont know when ill advance again#if ill advance again. i just gotta believe i guess? thank u parappa
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OKAYYY SO THIS WEEKEND I WILL LOCK TF IN ON THAT HADINA FIC I LITERALLY MADE ART FOR IT I GOTTA POST IT IDK WHEN ITLL BE DONE BUT YEA
Also for my official fic I’ll work on it after I finish my little project I think I just need to calm down and stop giving myself more work 😭 I have nothing to do other than write ,draw, and yap and I need to get the writing done I have to lock tf in I don’t think anyone has actually read anything I’ve written in literal months so it’s on the way sorry I keep giving myself really short time periods to work on stuff but yea ALSO I DID NOT LOOSE MY PASSION FOR HADINA HADES MAKES MY HEART GO BRRR THERES NO GETTING RID OF HIM BUT YEA IMMA LOCK TF IN THIS WEEKEND BY THE NEXT WEEKEND AFTER THIS IT SHOULD BE POSTED BECAUSE YEA SORRY FOR THE DELAY 😭😭💀
#🖇pumpkin writing talks 📚#HELP I WOULD ACTUALLY A HORRIBLE FULL TIME WRITER#LIKE BRO#YOU GET 1 CHAPTER AND THATS IT#MAYBE A PROLOGUE IF UR LUCKY AND THE WRITING ISNT EVEN GOOD 💀💀💀💀#IM SO DEAD BRO#IVE BEEN PUTTINGBTHIS SHIT OFF FOR WEEKS#IM SO SORRY LIKE THIS SCHOOL#I HATE SCHOOL#LIKE LITERALLY#THE PPL HERE PISS ME TF OFF BRO LIKE DOWNRIGHT#THEY ARENT REAL MAN#LIKE AT THIS POINT I QUESTION IF THE WORLD IS REAL BECAUSE OF THESE PPL THEYRE SO WEIRD#I HATE TEENAGE BOYS LIKE ACTUALLY 😭😭#ANYWAYS ENOUGH RANTING ABT SCHOOL BRO#GRAHHHHAABBSJDJDHRJDHEJE#BUT AGAIN SORRY FOR ALL THE DELAYS IDK WHEN THE SECOND CHAPTER WILL BE DONE BUT LIKELY BY MIDDLE OF END TO OCTOBER#SORRY IM SO SLOW AT WRITING BLAME SCHOOL#LIKE PLEASE#BLOW IT UP BRO#I CANT DO IT NO MORE#fanfic talk
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Its a great feeling to learn that the only person you actually talk about work with doesnt even know what your job really is...
Meanwhile, me, who regularly looks up wikipedia and other articles to make sure i understand their job and can be understanding when they vent: 😐
#the journal entry tonight will be LONG#everyday I tell people more things and everyday people find a new reason to make me regret it#and then people wonder why they dont know my life lore lmao#i do tell them they just dont fucking remember 😭😭#and you know what i wouldnt even be pissed because im used to it. its more about the fact they fucking lied#and told me that i somehow hadnt explained it well enough??? in the last 3 years of me explaining my job multiple times per month??#im just going to sleep honestly if i talk to them more itll just make me pissed#god its been so long since ive actually felt anger this strong towards someone#i write in caps lock a lot but im actually very neutral. this though? my heart is pounding and my ears are pounding#im MAD mad#i understand not having a good memory thats so understandable#but trying to tell me IM the one who never said it?? take a step back my guy#anyways anyways. sleep.#cryptid talks#edit: also i know my job is unclear for my mutuals here. i have to do that on purpose bc i dont want to actually say what i do#for a variety of reasons#this friend doesnt have that filter- they actually know what i do specifically
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