#IT IS. 11:50 pm I need to sleep since I have to get up EARLY tomorrow ough......... | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

keefwho · 2 years ago

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April 04 - 2023

8:50 AM

Its hard to accept but I want to focus on myself more. I’ve caught myself giving too much and I’m aware its not good to drain myself consistently when I’m not getting much back. I haven’t reached a bad point yet and thats good that I can catch it early on. Sometimes I don’t understand why I should be focusing on myself, like I don’t feel like there is a reason. Obviously I know I need to take care of my own needs but I always thing if I was the last person on earth, then what would it matter? I guess the logic is that since I’m not the last person on earth, I can at least take care of myself for the sake of others. I have to keep myself in decent shape in order to keep giving in a way that is sustainable.

7:29 PM

Sometimes I don’t know what to feel or I don’t wanna feel at all so I end up wanting to be degenerate and just cum because it’s something easy to get invested in. I don’t think that’s a problem but I have trouble finding a good outlet even for that sometimes.

10:27 PM

I still just... don’t know who I am or what I’m doing sometimes. I’ve also been able to label myself as having an inferiority complex so it’s good I could identify that. I have a lot of fear because of it. I fear that I may be too inferior to keep my friends. I’m often silently putting myself down, assuming I am not worth love or adoration. I want to much to experience feeling loved. I almost can sometimes but most of the time my own feelings about myself stop it from happening. I kinda wanna talk about it with someone, it might help a lot to get some communication about it. Actually hearing what people think of me in plain terms helps sometimes because otherwise I’m trying to infer how people feel and I always assume the worst. I want to be told straight up sometimes.

Instead of festering on feelings, I could express them through art. I’ve been bad about that lately. I tend to be a crybaby about things and I wait for people to notice. Then if they don’t, I become a bigger crybaby. Either that or I only wait for the perfect circumstances to express my feelings. Im basically blueballing myself all the time. I need to get things out and I know that. It’s always going to be perfect but it has to happen anyways.

Or sometimes I need a break from feeling and thinking in general which is something I don’t do enough. No more thinking tonight, Im just going to watch this Minecraft speedrun and relax. Maybe cry if feel like it.

11:03 PM

Nevermind, I’m ranting. I feel alone, even though I know I’m not. And when I feel alone I don’t see the point in anything. If no one is around to experience life with, I don’t want to live. The thing is I know I have people. They are THERE and sometimes I have a hard time connecting to them because of ME. Because for SOME reason, I think of myself as worthless. How can I even be so counterintuitive of a lifeform? If I really don’t think of myself as anything then why do I keep trying anything? Why don’t I abandon my sleep schedule, work schedule, and rot away in my bed? I guess because I get glimpses of what I want to live for. Because at least sometimes I feel good about myself and confident in my relationships.

And I have to announce this to myself (if I haven’t already). I want a partner. That’s okay. I always worry that I’m trying to use the idea of a partner as a bandaid to my problems. But I am too aware of that for that to be the case. I want someone to share loyalty with. I want to be on someone’s mind at all times, and the person they run to when they need help. It’s not out of reach, I deserve that. Nothing is inherently stopping me from being allowed to have this kind of dynamic. My whole life I would cast the idea aside because I thought of myself as the nerd character that never ever gets the girl. But I am no character, I’m a human like 8 billion others on this planet. I can love. And I want love.

11:33 PM

Im such a FOOL. Of course I’m cared for. IDIOT. I feel REALLY stupid. I always get sucked into these negative thought patterns and forget the truth. God I can be dumb sometimes.

I have to prioritize myself so I can achieve the things I desire. They all require a sound mental foundation. Otherwise I know the things I seek will only serve to bandaid my issues. Maybe the first step to countering my inferiority complex is to accept that I am at least worthy of my own care.

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misha-moose-dean-burger-lover · 4 years ago

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for @bend-me-shape-me 's SPN advent calendar 2020. prompt: phone calls and late night texts.

Cas isn't a serial texter.

And Dean's a-okay with it.

But for all that's worth, they sure seem to have a ridiculous amount of emotionally significant conversations via, or starting off as, texts. And most often, in the middle of the night.

>>> hello, dean. [12:07 am]

Dean jolts up at the sound, realizing he fell asleep still wearing his headphones, with the laptop on his lap (and a new episode of The Good Place playing) and rolls his eyes at himself, hitting pause before he can see what’s happening (because he has good reflexes, and because screw spoilers that’s why) and rummaging for his phone.

At this hour of the night, it has to be something important.

It doesn’t really strike him that Mechanical Engineering majors whose only other selfprofessed skill is air guitar aren't exactly the frontline warriors for midnight emergencies.

Cas's name shows up when he squints at the too-bright screen, and he sits up a little straighter.

<<< hey [12:09 am]

<<< you OK? [12:09 am]

The response is immediate.

>>> do you have peanut butter? [12:09 am]

And as if it's an afterthought, Cas adds.

>>> yes, I'm fine. how are you? [12:10 am]

Dean blinks.

<<< peachy. peanut butter? [12:10 am]

At least this time the response takes a while. Dean wonders if Cas realized it was midnight, and not exactly a time to run inventory on your best friend's stash of condiments.

>>> I ran out. [12:12 am]

Dean sighs, unable to help smiling.

It's not like he's a stranger to Cas's weird cravings when he's high. (There'd been this one time with pie and a traumatized Gas 'N Sip cashier that still sits heavy on Dean's conscience.) But he doesn't think Cas is supposed to be high right now — Dean's usually either invited or informed by an unspoken rule — which just means this is regular "jelly, not jam"-Cas, at his core a weird, persistently sleep-deprived economics major and astronomy nerd, that Dean may or may not have had a crush on for an embarrassingly long time, and who's also prone to grammatically perfect texting, deadpan, Disney references, and bluntness when the occasion calls for it.

<<< pretty sure i have some [12:14 am]

>>> :) [12:14 am]

>>> I'm coming over [12:14 am]

And weird as it may sound, that had turned out to be the night Cas told him he was gay. Said it had been a revelating moment, unprecedented and wholly unexpected — and apparently revelations come in pairs because it had been followed by an intense need for peanut butter, and the rest, he explained emphatically, was history.

Dean had just snorted, congratulated him, and brought out the fancier plates for sandwiches — shipped in from home instead of a sale at Target — all the while, repeating to himself in a loop, that this changed nothing between them, nothing at all, and Cas having the capacity to be attracted back to him didn't mean that he ever would be (or for hell's sake, he'd scoffed at his traitorous chick-flick-nonsense brain, is.)

The second time had been early — way, way too early and it was by pure chance that Dean was awake to respond at six friggin' am on a Sunday. Like, that’s practically nighttime.

Goddamn stupidly-fit running-freak.

Dean picks up his phone blearily, tongue in cheek as he clicks on it.

>>> I miss you [6:28 am]

>>> I'd* miss you [6:29 am]

Dean's stomach twists, and he's not sure if it's in a good way, or a bad way, or what-the-sincere-fuck-are-you-talking-about way.

<<< what [6:32 am]

<<< wtf are you talking about? [6:32 am]

Nothing.

<<< cas? [6:33 am]

<<< dude [6:34 am]

<<< cas???? [6:34 am]

Dean swears at his screen, more queasy than irritated. He can't stop fidgeting, so gives up on lying down altogether and hoists himself to his feet. Better to get his friggin' toothbrush since he's already up, and now definitely awake. Cas was so paying for this later.

He comes back, mouth mint-fresh in theory but still tasting awful and of fear and dread, and practically sags when he sees his screen blare with two messages from Cas.

>>> sorry, I had to make a call. [6:42 am]

>>> I'm not taking the job. [6:42 am]

And that's how Dean finds out about Michael (Cas's oldest brother, entitled asshole) inviting Cas to join his and Lucifer's (second oldest, bag of dicks) firm the year he graduates — invite, of course, being a loosely used word here for expecting it blindly (out of some crap he calls 'loyalty') and being readily willing to manipulate him into it.

And it's how he finds out that Cas turned them down.

"It's not who I am anymore." Cas had repeated, third time probably, and surer than before, and Dean had nodded earnestly before realizing Cas couldn't see him through the phone, and humming his affirmation instead. "And if I go back there, I'm never getting out again."

Dean'd swallowed.

"I don't want to." Cas had said, voice trembling. "I am — my own person here. It shouldn't be like this but this is the first time I have autonomy, Dean. Here is free will, and here are you. I don't — I can't. I'm not going to let them take it away."

"Good." He'd sounded shaky to even himself. "Don't."

"Yes." Cas had promised. "I'm not going."

And eventually they'd moved past the heavy talk into why-didn't-I-hear-about-this-before territory, Dean being righteously annoyed at his best friend for keeping something so huge from him, and Cas making lame (but probably valid) excuses in the name of not knowing how to explain the situation until he knew himself what he was going to do, because Dean may've been the first person he'd confided in about the insane fuckery that been his childhood and adolescence, but that still didn't mean he'd understand this, broken and convoluted.

And then Cas had nicely segued himself out of Dean's target of irritation and added, "They asked Gabriel too, by the way."

"And?" Dean didn't ever have much care for Gabriel (third oldest brother, cares about Cas, still a jerk) but Cas shared an apartment with him, so he had to face him plenty.

"He's running off to Miami."

And Dean had thrown his head back and laughed until Cas had smoothly added, "And I was wondering if you would consider moving in with me."

At which point, of course, he'd started coughing instead, because holy shit, it actually made sense (Sammy had left for Stanford two months back, and Dean lived alone in a space that had probably been two big even when there were two of them) and might actually happen, but Dean wasn't really sure how much longer he'd be able to hide his crush, sharing a friggin' kitchen with the guy.

The third time's after their first date.

(Because, well. It happened.

It happened with Dean leaning across the breakfast table to prove to Cas his bacon was superior (to cookie friggin' crunch, because goddamn is Cas a dork) and Cas taking a bite with their eyes fixed on each other's, and Dean turning red when Cas licked his lips and then, just like that, Cas swearing under his breath (definitely filed for later pondering, that bit), grabbing Dean, and kissing the living daylights out of him.

And Dean had kissed back with everything he had, hands cupping his face, and nearly melting in his arms - but then they'd separated for air and Cas had had an apologetic look on his face and when Dean had tried to lean in to kiss it away, he'd received half a smile and a shake of his head.

"Let's do it the way we're supposed to."

And Dean had known immediately what he'd meant. Let's not fuck this up by becoming best friends and roommates who sleep together. Let's...play safe.

"Okay. Uh," he'd rubbed the back of his neck. "Would you like to go on a date with me?"

"Thursday." Cas had promised with twinkling eyes, though Dean had already known he was going to say that since he knew Cas’s week at least as well as he knew his own, and two days and an anxious half of a thursday later, they went on their first date. Burgers and beer, and Led Zepp, and hands held in the Impala. Four hours later, they were back, and in their respective rooms, and Dean couldn't stop thinking about Cas.)

When his phone vibrates, Dean reaches for the bedside table.

It's at least midnight, it feels like he's been in bed for ages, and the only reason he isn't asleep is because all his brain seems to be capable of at the moment is thinking endlessly about the date. Fortunately, he's not the only one — although he's better at hiding it (practise, he'd say) because his heart is in his mouth the moment he reads Cas's text.

>>> I think I'm falling in love with you [11:43 pm]

>>> already. [11:43 pm]

Dean is very grateful for autocorrect as he types back with too-excited thumbs and a racing heart.

<<< so much for doing it the regular way cas mosby [11:44 pm]

>>> in my defense, it's been years. [11:44 pm]

<<< that part i get [11:44 pm]

<<< me too [11:44 pm]

<<< but youre supposed to wait three days before calling dumbass [11:45 pm]

Jesus, he'd never expected to blush cause of texts, but here they are.

>>> I'm texting. [11:46 pm]

And he guesses he'd never expected to giggle (he's alone there, sue him) cause of them either, but Cas apparently exists to prove him wrong about himself.

<<< good for you [11:46 pm]

He sends, biting his lip, and then lies in the silent darkness for a couple of minute, devoid of text notifications entirely, thinking uneasily — before he gives up.

They're idiots, sure, but nobody is this dumb.

<<< so when the fuck are you coming over then [11:50 pm]

>>> on my way <3 [11:50 pm]

And thinking about the lightening speed of that reply and the fucking heart emoji is enough to sustain him the entire one minute it takes Cas to get there, gently opening Dean's door, and climbing into bed — fitting in Dean's space like it's been made for him, and kissing him in greeting after leaving his phone on the table next to Dean's.

As it goes, with the confessions and the midnight cravings (and the grocery lists that keep getting piled onto through the day, and random pickup lines Cas decides are perfect to send Dean daily once he's found a website for puns, courtesy of Claire, and of course, pictures of Grease, which clog Dean's cloud in dozens whenever the ridiculously cute cat does something even slightly out of routine, god bless her lazy soul) Cas might just be a texter.

But Dean's pretty sure he's more than okay with it, so it doesn't really matter.

#spnadventcalendar2020 #destiel #destiel college au #casdean #dean is bi #texting fic #destiel fluff #best friends to lovers #+ roommates :))#deancas au #young dean winchester #young castiel #bluefirecas #rambleoncas #tearsofgrace #userpris #oh writing my writing #i had fun writing this :)#college aus almost feel like my roots at this point

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jjfics · 4 years ago

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Rosemary and Thyme - On The Run | 02

ship: Five Hargreeves x Female!Reader

summary: The Reader has killed someone and now the Hargreeves and her have to hide. So they look for shelter in the only place they know would welcome them: The Reader’s former employer.

series: read part 1 here

author: jane jack aka your girl jjfics

words: 3250

warnings: mentions of death, murder, blood and homelesness, feelings of uncertainty and anxiety, flashbacks, angst, guns, allusion to smut (does not happen though, i’ve cut it right before), smoking

a/n: i definitely did not expect it to be seen. i know 100 notes is not a lot, but i think i did pretty well for my second imagine out there, huh. thanks guys, for reading. i hope this one is just as great (or who knows, maybe better?). let me know if anyone would like a part 3. -jj

tags: @nimusicaltrash :3

Vanya and Allison were asleep in the backseat. Klaus, cramped between them, waved around a magazine he picked up from the last gas station you stopped at. Luther and Diego were discussing plans in the back, on the second row of seats.

Five took the passenger seat, he was very tired from all the driving. He refused to make any stops at all until it was absolutely necessary. The dark circles around his eyes begged him to sleep, but he couldn’t. All he could feel was stress and desperation. I have to get my family to safety, he would think.

Your now clean hands were clenched around the wheel of the car. The city was getting closer every moment and you unconsciously pressed harder on the gas pedal.

“Hey, hey! Careful there, I can’t read well when you go that fast” Klaus whined and you sighed. Right.

You saw Five look at his watch as he started bumping his right foot anxiously. Just a couple of metres away stood the “Welcome to Dallas” board.

“On time?” you ask, trying not to panic.

“Exactly on time” he reassures you with a nod. “Are you ready?” Ready? You were terrified.

“You’ll be okay. I’ll come inside with you, just in case.”

“What do you think old John can do to harm me?”

John was your boss in the 60s. Your salvation. He was mesmerized by your voice that day at the bakery, and he kept asking people around until he found you. It was your second night sleeping under the open sky, and little did you know it was all going to change. He made you a star. One makeover later and a lot of clothing stores you basically swapped lives with Allison. He let you live in the apartment above the club.

And he was probably also six feet under right now.

“Oh I wouldn’t be worried about him.” Five replies sarcastically. “Maybe he has a son. Whoever is in charge of the place, might be an issue for us.”

“What do you mean?”

“I just… What if he won’t cooperate? What if he won’t understand, or worse, give us to the police…” after he said that, he looked zoned out for a moment, as if he was going through all the possible ways your plan could fail.

If the police found you, you would be going straight to jail. There was no doubt that the Hargreeves could pay for your bail. So no worries with the police, really. But you were never going to be a free woman. The Commission would search for you, and if you killed one of them again, they would send new men after you until they made sure you were gone for good. As gone as the one you saw bleed to death.

You put your hand on his knee as you turned left onto the main street. If the club was still standing it should be just around the corner.

His attention switched back to you and he scoffed quietly. “Look at us. Just a couple of hours ago you were the one having a panic attack and now it’s my turn.”

A small smile appeared on your face. “We’re a team, remember?” And he mirrored the expression just before you parked the car.

“Alright everybody, listen up!” he shouts so that everyone would turn and look at him. The sisters woke up too. They were all on the same train now. “Me and y/n are going to walk inside this club and arrange something so we’ll sleep safely for tonight. Vanya is going to wait in the car, ready to drive away and help us escape. Diego and Luther will wait outside. Got it?” Diego raised an eyebrow but Five continued “Just in case anything happens. You never know.”

“I’ll wait with them, I need to breathe some fresh air” Allison said as she stretched her arms as far as she could in the small van.

“Alright then” Five said, looking at the main entrance of the club through the passenger window. “Let’s get to this y/n” he gave you a small smile.

You searched for his hand and squeezed it gently.

The doors of the car closed behind you two as you got out of the car. Diego, Luther and Allison were pretending they were just locals talking about what not, getting closer to the big glass doors. When they stopped walking Diego turned a bit to the left and started laughing. This was it, your sign to go.

“Hey, be safe, okay? Leave as soon as anything gets out of hand. We can find some other place to stay at.” Vanya told you when you were ready to get out of the car. Your best friend was worried about you, of course. She is always a bit anxious. But you had no other choice.

On the way here you were mentioned 8 times on the radio. You and the Hargreeves. Wanted criminals. This was your only chance to find shelter. If this didn’t work, you couldn’t really find some other place. You would pretty much have to sleep in the car or on the streets. No, impossible, you couldn’t go through that again.

“We’ll be fine Vivi.” She chuckles sadly at the nickname you gave her in the early stages of your friendship.

“Klaus, hand me that magazine! It’s my turn” Vanya said while tapping her fingers on the steering wheel.

“Ah, fine.” he whined. “Turn on the radio.”

Hand in hand with Five you made your way to the front hall of the club, heading towards the bar, which was on a platform just above the empty dance floor. You took your sunglasses off as you sat on one of those black stools at the bar. Same leather like 50 years ago. It felt surreal to be here again, with Five sitting next to you.

“What are you doing so early? And with a kid? There ain’t no party yet ms.” you couldn’t help but smile as you recognized the southern drawl. You pushed your foot on the floor and rotated the chair. There she was, with her hair pinned up the same way as always, wearing short heels that matched her dark lipstick. It had been so long since you had seen her.

Amy Stephens, your boss John’s little sister. She should be 74 by now, and even though she was just 17 when you started working at the club, you still knew who she was. Amy was the only friend you had during those months when you were alone. You showed her how to do her make up, you went shopping together when you needed new stage outfits, you taught her how to fight, something John would’ve scolded you for if he found out.

“Hello.” you said looking kindly at your old friend. “I’m not here for any party. I’m just looking for someone.”

“Oh well, let’s see if I can be of any help to ya. What you got?”

“Do you happen to know a Stephens?” Five asked her.

“Stephens? Yeah, yeah, that’s me kid. With what business are you coming here?” she questioned resting her arm on her hip.

“Are you in charge of the place?” you said putting your glasses in the pocket of your jacket.

“Sure am. Can I help you?”

“Yeah… we… uh… a friend told us you used to give the apartment for rent? Is that… still available?” You didn’t quite know how to carry the conversation without blowing your cover.

“Ah, yes. It’s been a long time since anyone slept in there. You knew the famous y/n Hargreeves used to live here?” Five suppressed a smile, winking at you, but the woman didn’t notice. “Do you kids even know her? You look young. Anyways, popular singer back in 62. Or was it 63?” she muttered.

“Big fans” Five told her.

Your name wasn’t Hargreeves, of course, but you had no certificate when your boss found you. So you did everything you could to associate yourself with Five and his siblings in hope you might find them.

“Would you be interested in staying here?”

“Yes, that’d be really nice” Five said eagerly.

“Follow me, I’ll show you around.”

The door to your old apartment opened and little dust particles could be seen floating in the morning light. Amy pushed the wooden door with her shoulder and walked inside.

“My God, we haven’t been in here since Ms Hargreeves moved out. Seems like she really was our last tenant” she whispered, but you heard her well. “But don’t worry children, the place is clean. There’s two bedrooms and a bathroom, a small kitchen and a balcony. Come come”. You knew that grin, it meant the apartment has probably been rotting ever since you left.

She led you to the bedroom that wasn’t used when you lived here. “See, two rooms, perfect for you and the kid, huh” She tried to convince you. Five chuckled and put his arm around your waist when she turned around to walk to the main bedroom.

“And this… this is the second one. There’s still a luggage full of her stuff under the bed but I can get rid of that for ya.” she slapped her hand on the mattress and more dust came out of it. “So what you thinkin’? You like it here?”

“Oh that's not a problem girl, bring them in. As long as you don’t make too much noise after 11 pm, we’re all good.”

You shared a look with Five to tell him This is the best we could do. He nodded and you both turned to look at Amy who was now staring uncomfortably at the two of you. Yeah, you would have to hide your relationship around her. He moved his hand casually and then you spoke again. “Yes, this is quite what we were looking for. But it’s not just us. We’ll be 7, including me, my boyfriend and his 5 siblings.”

“Isn’t there noise from the party downstairs anyways at that hour?” Five asked her. The expression on Amy’s face changed as she looked down.

“The party huh… you’re not from here are ya? Well, I was just joking earlier, kid. When y/n Hargreeves left the club, the people got angry. She was the main reason why people still came. Most stopped coming after some time, it simply wasn’t smart to keep the club partying. Now it’s nothing more than a property.”

They… went bankrupt, because you stopped showing up? You knew people loved you, but John never told you you were the one holding up their business. A tear rolled down your cheek. All that fame, all the posters. You had bleached your hair when you returned to 2019 and you wore sunglasses everywhere. No one could know who you were. Some get their 30 seconds of fame, you got your year. One year could mean your whole life sometimes.

You were laying on Elliot’s couch with the phone pressed between your ear and shoulder as you were trying to take off your coat. Five reached to help you mouhting I got it. He took your coat to the hanger and then disappeared into the kitchen.

“Hello, this is John Stephens speaking.”

“Hi, John. It’s just me, y/n. I- uh, I’m calling from a friend's house. I think I’m going to spend the night. Just thought it’ll be fine for you to know in advance.”

“y/n, yes. So, what you’re saying is... that you won’t be here in time for tonight’s show?” he said anxiously. You didn’t know this at the time, but he was worried about losing profit.

“No no, I just- I would really want to hang out with my friend and it’ll be just for tonight.”

Gosh, you were reasoning with him as if he were your dad.

“Oh,come on, Hargreeves. Not even one song?”

You laughed at how disparate he was. “Sorry. Not even one. I’ll be gone til morning. But I’m sure no one will miss me that much. Besides, you can always ask Amy to sing. She’s been getting better. For real, John. That girl has potential.”

“There ain’t no well in hell I’m letting my sister get up in front of all these drunks to sing. She’s just 17, woman!”

You couldn’t stop laughing now. “Goodnight, John. I’ll- Well I’ll see you on Monday if we don’t run into each other.”

“Have a nice evening, y/n”

You hung up the phone and rose from the couch. When entering the kitchen you saw Five pouring coffee in two big mugs. You went and hugged him from behind, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek. You could feel him smiling as you kissed him again. He took the mugs and turned around to face you leaning on the counter.

“Did you miss me?” he asked innocently, making you giggle.

You leaned in and kissed him. You could still taste the coffee on his lips. He kissed you back and you felt him smirk as you laced your hands behind his neck.

“Did I miss you?” you asked him back rhetorically. And you could see how eager he was to meet your lips again. You gave him a quick peck on the lips, and one on his shoulder, and then you hugged him tightly. “I did. A lot.”

“I know what it’s like to be alone. I promise you, we won’t have to go through that again. I’ll try everything I can do to be together forever.”

“Forever?” you asked.

“Assuming you won’t kick me out, of course.” You smacked his arm.

“Idiot.” you said between laughs. “Give me one of those mugs.”

He hands you your coffee and you take a sip. “Black?”

“We have a lot to talk about,” he said.

You both sat back on the couch and went over anything and everything. How you got famous. Where the others were. How he just arrived. What he saw. How long everyone had been here.

“How long do we have?” you asked, searching for his eyes.

He leaned back on the couch. “A lot more than last time. Enough time to find out what causes it, and more importantly, how to stop it.”

You smiled at his words. After all this time, you were finally reunited, and no one was rushing you now. You had nothing to lose anymore, except time. Your hands unconsciously inched towards his thigh and you traced small hearts on his leg. “That means we can breathe safely for a while, right?”

Five brought you closer to him, straddling him now. He brushed your hair behind your ear so you could see him better. Your fingers explored his face carefully. The bump of his nose, his cheeks, his dimples as he grinned at you. Gosh, how you had missed his dimples. You missed everything about him.

“We have almost one full year,” he said.

“Then we better make the best of it, right?” you said as your lips brushed against his.

He laid his head on the fluffy cushions and you followed, not breaking eye contact. His blue eyes scanned yours and your soul ran wild. You towered over him and pressed your forehead on his. Suddenly, the sound of the cars outside stopped and it all went silent. In this moment, there was only you and him. And this moment would exist forever.

You had to make up for all the time you were apart. You kissed him passionately, closing your eyes. His hands flowed along your curves and rested on your hips, pressing you hard on his chest. The kiss tasted like his favourite kind of coffee. Every movement of yours was matched instantly by him. He didn’t need words to know. Neither did you.

Five pulled away for a second, looking at you lovingly, desire clear in his eyes. He took your left hand in his and shifted you so that you were laid on your back. He sat on his elbows just above your head. Your hands hugged his shoulders, getting him to slowly bend down. You could feel your eyes fill with tears as you watched him watch you. A flash of worry appeared on his face, but just for a moment.

Five wiped your cheeks with the back of his palm, and kissed your cheeks. You kissed his hand and he kissed yours back, his hot breath fanning over your sensitive skin. His kisses started to travel upwards, to your elbow, then shoulder, then neck, then down again. You closed your eyes as his kisses passed your collarbone. He tugged softly on your shirt.

“May I?” he hummed with a boyish smirk you hadn’t seen in a long while. You nodded, brushing his hair back.

“Yes, please.” you flushed.

He started unbuttoning your shirt, enjoying every second of it. With every button, he would press one more kiss. With every breath, you would inhale his sweet scent, praying to never forget it.

The morning was cold. Diego and Lila were asleep in the bedroom, Elliot on an armchair. Oh, the poor man couldn't even sleep in his own bed. Five was on the couch, next you. You pushed the blanket closer to him and got up after pecking his forehead.

“Goodmorning, y/n.” he whispered, not even bothering to open his eyes.

“Morning, Five.”

“Where are you going?” he whined.

“Oh don’t worry, I’ll be right back”

You searched for your shirt and pants only to find them underneath your pillow. Getting dressed up in a hurry, you covered your shoulders with what seemed to be another blanket… or a really long scarf. Either way, it was warm enough. You reached for a cigarette in your pocket and made your way outside.

You sat on the cold stairs that led up to the entrance of the building and watched the people pass the alley.

“Look at them, rushing to get to their shitty jobs in time, to get their kids to school, rushing, rushing, rushing.” you scoffed under your breath.

“Good thing we don’t have to rush anywhere, right?” a voice startled you. You turned your head to the door to see Five already dressed nicely with a mug of, probably, coffee again. How convenient it could be for him sometimes to jump through space. Always a step ahead of you.

“That's not healthy.” he pointed at your cigarette.

“That’s not either” you said gesturing to his drink and he chuckled, amused.

“Yeah, well, at least I won’t get sick” he sat down, resting his head on your shoulder.

“We can’t have that happen. Even a cold can be deadly for an old man like you.” You bumped your cigarette on the side of his mug smiling. “Cheers”

Making your way back to the car you saw everyone was outside.

“Vanya why are you not in the car?” Five asked immediately.

“It just took too long and I was worried.”

“Is it so hard to just stick to the rules? Is it? All you had to do was sit there.” he sighed.

Everyone looked worried, so you smiled softly. “We got the key guys, it’s all good. Let’s go upstairs, I’m tired.”

“Thank, God.” Allison said so relaxed, unaware of the gun pointing at her from behind a tree nearby. She walked to the club’s doors. “Let’s go.”

#number five #five x reader #five imagine #five hargreeves #five #five hargreeves imagine #five hargreeves x reader #number five x reader #number 5 x reader #number 5 #The Umbrella Academy #the umbrella academy imagine #tua imagine #number five imagine

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kayrogers · 4 years ago

Text

sugar baby ][ r. drysdale

50 shades / CEO au

Paring(s): ceo!ransom x curator!reader

Inspo: the embarrassing amount of ransom smut I've read

Word Count: 2300+

Warning(s): cursing, implied smut, unequal power-dynamic, mention of kinks, and ransom being the hot douche he is

Part: part 1 | part ??

A/N: imma be real with y’all I saw knives out in theaters like three times and I am absolute ransom trash, I apologize

It was already a shitty day.

By the time you had reached Thrombey Selects, you were on the verge of frustrated tears and you hadn’t even gone into your interview yet.

Your day started normal enough, you prepared for your interview and organized your portfolio about ten different times before you could run out the door. Coffee was a better option than actual food for breakfast as the thing really filling your stomach was anxiety. You had only gotten your masters recently and it was a miracle that you were given an interview at Thrombey Selects, only having pulled together minimal art galleries — most of which were done as part of getting your degree in the first place.

Then there was the subway. It felt like it took forever to get to the Lower East Side, especially being sat between two men with no concept of personal space and a snot-nosed two year old giving you a stink eye across the aisle. And to make matters worse you got a coffee spilled on your dress right as you walked off the train. The woman who spilled it actually had the audacity to scream at your face, and say it was your fault, like she wasn’t nose-deep in her phone. Luckily, you had left your apartment super early and you stopped at the nearest department store you could find. A too-expensive little black dress later and you were on your way to Thrombey Selects. And then it down poured and by the time you walked into the building, every inch of you was drenched in water.

You took a deep breath, approaching the receptionist with rain droplets falling from your hair and onto the floor. She looked up at you with an unimpressed gaze, stating that you’d be meeting with a Mr. Drysdale ‘whenever he felt like showing up’. You weren’t exactly sure what that meant but you took it as a chance to dry off.

Stepping away towards an empty hallway you were quick to work, taking up residence next to a decorative plant and ringing your hair out into the pot. Taking off your cardigan was the most work, the grey material sticking to your skin like glue. You undoubtedly looked like a madman, wrestling to get the knit off and finally slicking it onto the floor to reveal the tight little number you bought.

“Quite the weather, huh?” A deep male voice said from behind you.

You jumped and nearly tripped over your heels as you turned around to find the source. That source being a very gorgeous man with piercing blue eyes. He had a confident smirk and carved features, it was almost like he was created by a sculptor in Rome.

“Oh- oh my gosh! Sorry, I um yeah... kinda got caught in the rain.” You blush with a sigh, still taking in the stranger’s appearance.

He dressed sharp, yet casual. Adorning himself in a black turtleneck and pants, accompanied by a brown trench coat and Chelsea boots. The accessory on him which drew the most attention though was a large, flowery scarf. You suddenly felt very aware of the less glamorous state of your dress and reached for the cardigan you so ungraciously plopped on the floor.

“You’re [Y/n], right? [Y/n] [Y/l/n]?” He shamelessly looked you up and down while saying that, only making you blush more.

“How do you know my-“

“Because I’m interviewing you. The name is Hugh Ransom Drysdale, but you can just call me Ransom. The help call me Hugh.” His lips curled into a wide smirk and he shook your hand as it changed into a white-toothed grin.

‘The help’ stuck in your head for a moment and nearly made you frown. Any man who talked like that came from money, lots of money. And he clearly wasn’t the type to be polite about it.

“Let’s head up to my office, Honey.” And with that the two of you were on your way.

You could help but feel his eyes on you with every step you took, each click of your heels hitting the floors like a deafening clock. He opens a door to reveal a sleek, modern office room complete with a portrait of Harlan Thrombey on the back wall. You would recognize that face anywhere after reading his novels repeatedly, his picture always located in the back. He was the reason you applied here in the first place, he was passionate and creative. Any man like him would be expected to have a taste for the arts.

Ransom took his seat behind the desk and you sat in front of him gripping your portfolio tightly while he pulled out a Manila file.

“It’s interesting that grandad picked you for the interview... from the looks of it, you’re extremely under qualified compared to the rest of the staff.” Ransom immediately listed off in a twisted tone, dismissive and intrigued all at once.

You pulled a tight-lipped smile, “and yet, here I am.”

He looked up from the file, blue eyes shooting into your own holding intent you could not read. The smirk appeared on his face once more.

“Tell me about yourself, [Y/n]. I want a better understanding.” You suddenly felt small in that moment, you knew what he was actually telling you.

‘Show me why I should give a fuck about you.’

“Uh- well I’m a hard worker. I come from a low income family so I’ve been working since I was 14, in my mom’s diner. I still serve to keep up with rent, but that’s at a classier place no offense to my mom. Art has um always been my passion though... I’m sorry, am I doing this right?” You bit your lip, staring across to see Ransom sporting a sneaky smile you didn’t understand.

“How bout I help you along? Are you prepared for a lot of physical work? How much do you exercise a week? I know you may think being one of our curators is easy work, but I like to run things differently here.” That confuses you.

You know how curation works, hell it’s why you got your degree but the only physical thing you ever did was hang paintings on a wall.

“Uh- I mean I workout when I can but I’m pretty busy. I serve so I get a lot of time on my feet. But, I’m sure I can handle whatever you throw at me!” You answered honestly and watched as he quirked an eyebrow.

“I’m sure you can Miss [Y/l/n]. So... any significant others?” Warmth filled your face at his question.

“No I am single- sorry I just don’t understand what this has to do with being a curator.” You finish with a smile to hide how unsure you were.

Ransom just grins back, “oh that is because I am opting you for a better position. Higher up, better pay grade, and more personal work with me. Here take a look,” He reaches into his desk and pulls out a black file, tossing it to you.

Opening the folder shows you a contract that makes your eyes nearly bulge out of your head.

‘Sugar Baby’ is in bold at the top.

Reading through, you become flustered seeing the requirements and perks. The pay is definitely better, but is it worth the submissive role he intends you to play? Calling him ‘Sir’? Your cheeks burn as you keep flicking through, seeing all his kinks and desires written in ink. The particular emphasis on bondage and the sub/dom dynamic made heat pool between your legs. You run your thighs together in instinct, missing how his eyes light up at the response.

“You don’t have to give me an answer right now. In fact, my cell is on there, take a few days to look it over and text me. If not, I can still offer you that basic paid internship of a position.” His eyes were intense when they met yours, hiding the gears which were in overdrive behind their deep blue.

He was manipulating you and he wasn’t even shy about it. You were ashamed to think that you didn’t mind it. This was insane! Completely unethical and gross, but you found yourself considering the position all the same. Especially given the rut you found yourself in for quite a while now in the sex department. Graduating and entering your career didn’t leave much time for any sexual encounters, excluding your dominant hand.

“Yeah- uhm I’ll definitely have to get back to you. Not that I’m not interested-“ Your voice betrayed you, coming out quiet and almost naive.

“- it’s a lot. Sleep on it, Babe.” He stood up and you took that as your signal to leave which you were thankful for.

“Thank you, Mr- sorry.. Ransom.” You stood as well, closing the folder and holding it tightly in your hands.

You move to grab your sopping cardigan but he scoops it up before you can.

“I’ll have our dry cleaners handle this, don’t need a potential employee getting pneumonia today. Take my jacket, I’m sure I’ll be getting it back soon.” He matter-of-factly states and hands you his trench coat.

You sling it on, feeling small in the garment made for the clearly muscular man. Even in your heels he towered over you.

“Thank you.” There’s a small smile on your face and you head towards the door.

He walks behind you, his hand finding the small of your back as he opens the office door for you.

“Can’t wait to hear from you, Miss [Y/l/n].” Ransom’s voice is low and his breath fans on the back of your neck as you exit and the door clicks behind you.

It was about 11 PM in your apartment as you sat on your bed thinking of perhaps the longest pro-con list you could with a glass of wine in hand.

You had been surfing on your laptop, gathering as much information as you could about Ransom Drysdale and the idea of being a ‘sugar baby’.

‘Pros: He’s gorgeous. We have a lot of the same kinks. It’s a lot more money than the internship. I’ll probably get some nice clothes out of this. I can stop waitressing. He’s really really hot. I have the opportunity to live my dream and work at my dream company, and get some good sex on the side.’ You thought, biting your lip and thinking too much about what he looked like without clothes on.

‘Cons: this is a very unprofessional proposition and definitely a little demeaning. He’s clearly a douche. The ‘help’ comment. I don’t know if he even is that good in bed. I don’t really know this man at all and now I’m basically signing a portion of my life to him. If he doesn’t think I’m good in bed, am I getting fucked over??’ You took a large gulp of wine, eyes focused on the computer screen in front of you.

Ransom’s crystalline eyes stared back at you through the screen, the picture from a Ralph Lauren photo shoot.

“Fuck, he’s a model too.” You muttered with a groan.

Of all the valid negatives that filled your mind, the heat pooling below your stomach at the thought of him taking control of you and your life felt much stronger. Were you a little messed up to even be considering this so heavily?? Fuck, probably.

But even so, the idea tantalized you in such a way that had you reaching for the folder to read through his demands once again.

You didn’t quite like the demands of you working out 4 times a week and completely overhauling your diet. Sure, you probably shouldn’t have been eating the amount of microwaveable and junk foods you usually did but that's none of his business! But perhaps these things could be amenable within the contract? You decided you wouldn’t take part unless they were.

But most importantly, you wouldn’t decide on anything without a good night’s sleep.

The next morning you stared at the contract as though it were the most important thing you could sign in your life. A weight settled on your shoulders and you avoided the piece of paper for the rest of the morning. Instead you decided to run through your daily routine, taking a shower and getting dressed for the day. You made yourself a cup of coffee and stared at your small apartment with a slight frown.

Reality rushed through you as you realized the position you were in before this opportunity presented itself. You have tremendous debt from school, even with the scholarships you had received. The shoebox you lived in was already barely affordable while you practically worked yourself to death at the upscale bar-restaurant you were currently employed with. The idea that you could leave all this and live lavishly on the payroll of one of the wealthiest families in New York, was one which had been growing on you enormously.

Impulsively, you grabbed your phone and typed his phone number into your messages.

‘Hello, Mr. Drysdale. Or I guess I should say, Ransom.

This is [Y/n] [Y/l/n]. I have thought over your offer and though I have a few concerns with certain aspects of the contract... I would be glad to talk them over with you and get to an agreement we are both comfortable with. I am indeed interested in this position.

When would you like to go over the details?’

You typed out the message, writing in the most professional manner you could (despite the content of the proposal). Pressing the send button sent a series of sparks through your skin and up your spine, butterflies filling your stomach.

Within minutes though, there was a response.

‘Saturday night. Be ready at 7 PM sharp. I will send a car for you. Can’t wait ;)’

----------------------------------------------------------

taglist(s):

sugar baby -

permanent -

@ultrunning @jesseswartzwelder

#ransom drysdale #ransom drysdale imagine #ransom drysdale x reader #knives out imagine #chris evans imagine #ceo au #50 shades au #sugar daddy au

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marvelousell · 5 years ago

Text

The Agreement (Part 3.)

Pairing(s): frat boy!fwb!Tom x reader, frat boy!Harrison x reader

Summary: Tom is a typical frat boy, his love for partying, drinks and girls are bigger than his ego. Y/N is a whole different dimension, she keeps her circle small, and even though she knows her best friend Tom is a total douche, she can’t say no to the little deal that was sealed between the two of them.

Word count: 2.5k

A/N: Here it is guys part 3.! I’m so glad you all like this series, and I’m so grateful for all the amazing comments and reactions you send me 🥰. I would still appreciate it if you reblog, leave a comment or send a feedback!❤️

My tag list is open for this series!

Warnings: mentions of smut, swearing, mentions of alcohol

Part 1. Part 2.

Masterlist

“Tom get that.”

“Tom your phone is ringing.”

“For fuck’s sake.”

The annoying beeping of the phone woke you from the deep slumber.

You were so jaded. The sharp pain in your muscles and in between your thighs made you yelp as you tried to sit yourself up.

Your eyes were burning, aching for more sleep.

“Are you deaf or what?” You said, finally opening your eyes.

However you were welcomed with an empty bed. The right side of the bed was cold, so it meant he went away a long time ago.

Stupid you.

“Well what did you thought Y/N? That he would stay in the morning, snuggle you up and make you breakfast?! Of course he would leave, that’s Tom after all.” You let out a loud sigh, crossing your arms, clearly annoyed that he didn’t at least tell you he was going home.

“A fucking message would be polite Holland.” You muttered to yourself.

Okay calm down. That’s how this thing works right? You wanted this, so we’re going to put the feelings aside.

“Okay the overthinking needs to stop, everything will be just fine.” You said, sliding back into your bed.

Hey it’s Saturday, nothing to do so why not?

Oh wait if it wasn’t Tom’s phone ringing it was yours.

Who is even already up at this time, and on weekend as well?

11:50 AM

Already noon? That explains a lot.

1 missed call from Anna

3 text messages from Anna

2 missed calls from Tom

3 text messages from Tom

So he did call after all. Lucky me.

Hey you up?

It’s almost noon Y/N you never sleep that long, call me when you wake up.

Are you going today? Do you want me to pick you up?

What the hell are you talking about Anna?

Did I make some plans and totally forgot about them? That would be embarrassing.

Morning love, I just wanted you to know I left early because the guys from the frat needed me. Didn’t want to wake you up, thought you need that rest after last night.

You still sleeping or? Did I dick you down that good?

Never mind. Harry is having a chill barbecue party tonight, so he told me to call you, Anna and Amelia are going too so they told me they would pick you up. Also take a bikini if you want to.

Dicked me down to good?! Idiot.

So the barbecue party is what they are talking about. Cool.

Will there be more cute girls? Probably.

And boys as well, so that means let’s have fun.

He isn’t the only one that can enjoy himself.

To Anna:

I’m going, pick me up around six.

Oh you better! Take that red cute bikini, some bird told me there will be some hot guys.

Typical Anna. But she ain’t wrong.

Stupid pain. I’m a mess, my room is a mess.

I need a break for sure, and a bath would definitely help because limping all day is a big no.

The scent of the eucalyptus oil filled the whole bathroom. The warm water mixed with it reduced the soreness and stiffness that was making you feel exhausted.

It was what you needed, enjoying the silence and some me time.

Until the phone rang again.

“Are you kidding me right now?” You groaned from the feeling of the chilly air coming in contact with your warm body as you tried to reach your phone.

Tom.

“Hello.” You answered, closing your eyes to relax as much as possible.

“Good morning to you too love. Didn’t wanna answer my calls eh?”

“I was sleeping Tom.”

“Yes, but you replied to Anna’s messages.”

“Well she needed to know if she will pick me up or not.”

“So you’re going?” He asked.

“Of course I’m going, wouldn’t miss that.”

“I kinda called you to say that I’m going to ask Sophie for that coffee, so God please help me and get her off my dick.” Tom continued, hoping that this will go as planned.

“Mmm great.” You moaned, the bath doing the job, making you feel ten times better.

“Are you touching yourself?” The voice on the other line spoke. You could practically hear him smirking.

“Excuse you?!” You screeched, not believing his words now.

Well there goes your relaxing time.

Thanks Tom.

“Nothing to be ashamed of. If I was you, I would do that too after the good sex last night, with me in your mind, rewinding the scenes that happened.” He laughed through the phone.

“Your ego is really bigger than your dick Holland.” You joked, but still telling the truth.

“Ouch sweetheart, should I let you finish what you started? We don’t want you to be that infuriated tonight.”

“For your information I’m having a bath. Trying to relax a bit.” You spit back.

“Ohh, so I did a good job after all?”

“Goodbye Thomas, see you tonight.”

“Sure sweetheart, see you.”

He really was a pain in the ass sometimes, but there was something that made you totally hooked.

You ended the call, standing up from the bath drying yourself up.

“Let’s find that bikini then.”

It was 5 PM now, the doorbell echoing through the small apartment.

“Just a minute!”

“Hello to you too gorgeous.” Anna’s singing voice lightened up your mood instantly.

The anxiety was present. Normally it would just be a stupid barbecue party. All good, nothing to worry about. Anna, Amelia, Tom and Harry would be your company, you would all enjoy the night, talking and drinking together.

But after everything you couldn’t suppress the nervousness that was making you almost puke.

“You look beautiful Y/N! So I believe that you put on the red thing right?” She smiled, winking at you.

“I did. Who knows maybe someone will love that old piece?” You joked, looking for your bag.

“Oh come on, I have someone for you to meet tonight, he is totally your type!” She began, “A great opportunity to set aside the crush for our famous lover.”

Anna was the only one who knew about the silly crush on Tom.

I mean how could she not? You, Tom and Anna were inseparable since you were little kids.

Harry was younger so he joined the group later.

Amelia was the last addition. You two met in college, clicking immediately. So you introduced her to others, and that’s how it began.

“Fair enough, I do need someone right?” You questioned, styling your hair.

“Yes! It has been a while since you have had a boyfriend, and sex.” She raised her eyebrows, sending you a cheeky smile.

Yes, it has been. Especially sex. Fifteen hours is extremely long. I agree with that Anna.

“Oh, wait you had company yesterday?” She asked, eyeing the two wine stained glasses that were on the kitchen counter.

Crap.

What am I supposed to say now?

“Uhm, n-no..both glasses are mine.” You said, hoping that she doesn’t suspect something.

“Both?” She asked suspiciously.

“Yeah, I was reading a book. My regular Friday night, and I was in the mood for some wine. I kinda put the first glass in my room, and when I went back to the living room I was already tipsy and I forgot where I put my glass, so I just took a new one.”

“Christ what a lame excuse Y/N.” You thought, feeling your cheeks getting hotter.

“Not going to lie, that sounds like you. You’re so confused when you get drunk.” She laughed, making you relaxed.

“Yeah, yeah…totally. Are we going now?” You said changing the theme, exhaling the air that got stuck in your throat a few seconds ago.

“Let’s go, you’re boy is waiting!”

Jesus give me strength for this night.

“Y/N! Anna!” Harry yelled, drawing the attention to us.

A chill barbecue party? This place is almost jam-packed.

“Well long time no see Harry.” You smiled, embracing him in a tight hug.

“Since Monday. I know you can’t go without me that long.”

“I guess I can’t.”

“You two can get a drink and take a seat or whatever you want. I still need to finish this food so I will find you after that, yes?” He asked.

“Don’t worry Holland Y/N will definitely be busy in a while.” Anna stated, laughing together with Harry.

“Oooh yes, forgot about that.”

“Why does everyone know something that I don’t?” You asked completely confused.

“Enjoy yourself Y/N! Why don’t you get us something to drink and I will try to find Amelia?”

“Sure, whatever.” You answered, still a bit suspicious because of their behaviour.

The place was starting to get full. The music that was playing in the house was loud enough for you to make your way to the kitchen as fast as you could.

You were looking around the house trying to find him. You couldn’t help yourself.

The kitchen was small but at least empty, and it had a view on the whole living room.

You put Anna’s drink on the counter, resting your back on it and looking at the sea of people, hoping you would catch at least a glimpse of Tom.

And you caught more than a glimpse for sure.

Tom and a familiar blonde attached to his hip.

Nothing unusual.

If only he wasn’t that dumb and blind, so he could see how much you like him and how a relationship isn’t a bad thing.

If only.

You are his best friend but you still didn’t know him.

Tom was a great guy. He had a good heart, but why didn’t he trust girls? Why is commitment such an issue for him?

Many questions were in your head right now and they were all unanswered.

Oh Tom, I definitely need to lose these feelings.

“He sure knows how to get a girl.” A male voice spoke behind you, making you turn instantly.

Wow.

You were greeted with a pair of deep blue eyes that were fixed on yours. His broad smile and perfect teeth were absolutely breathtaking. They could brighten up every girls day.

His figure was leaning on the fridge, drink in his hand. He adjusted his glasses, still looking at you.

“You mean Tom? Yeah, but only in his bed.” You joked, making him laugh.

“You’re not wrong.” He spoke.

“I’m sorry I didn’t introduce myself. Harrison.” He extended his hand, waiting for your name.

“Y/N, nice to meet you.” You took his hand in yours, the warm feeling sending chills through your body.

Jesus those irresistible blue eyes.

You were smiling like crazy, possibly looking like a fool.

“Beautiful name.” He spoke.

“Thank you, yours is not that bad either.” You smiled, unable to keep your eyes away from him.

Oh shit Anna’s drink.

Well she wouldn’t mind.

“Would you like to go outside maybe? A bit to crowded here.” He asked.

Is he really asking me to go with him somewhere?

Just be yourself Y/N.

“Sure.”

“After you.” He motioned you to go first, standing close behind you.

How incredible would it be if Tom saw you now.

However he was to busy facing the girl that will be his partner for the night. He was whispering in her ear, making the blonde giggle.

You couldn’t judge, you fell for his actions too.

This is just for fun. This is just sex. Nothing else.

Keep that in mind.

Someone out there is waiting for you.

“What do you say?” Harrison’s voice was ringing in your ears.

I zoned out again, why am I so embarrassing?

“Sorry, I didn’t hear you the music is just too much.” You turned your head, his face now close to yours.

“No worries. I asked if you would like to sit there.” He asked one more time, pointing to the small table in the garden.

You nodded.

There were still people around you, but his presence was making you more nervous than them.

You didn’t feel like this in a while, that’s a good start.

“So..you’re here with someone?” He began the small talk.

“Yes, with my friends. Couldn’t miss Harry’s ‘chill’ party.” You laughed, emphasising the word chill.

“Harry and his chill parties.” Harrison laughed, seeing where you’re coming from.

“You know him?” He added.

“Harry? We’re best friends since forever.”

“Really? How did I never met such a beautiful friend of his?”

You were blushing like a teen girl on her first date.

Who wouldn’t? Look at him, he was not just handsome but kind and sweet as well.

“I’m not someone who would immediately catch a boy’s attention, but thank you.” You smiled, glancing at him lowering your eyes on your drink.

“You sure caught mine.” His sweet voice spoke back.

The damn weird feeling in my stomach. Is he really making me feel these things already?

“Oh stop it you’re making me blush.” You covered your face, grinning widely.

“I think that you’re absolutely adorable when you blush if I may add.” He laughed.

Harrison was smitten.

He just wanted to get himself a drink and go find Harry.

However his plans were interrupted by a gorgeous girl in a pastel dress.

She was already lost in her thoughts when he stepped inside.

Harrison still got a perfect view of her face that was staring at the crowd forming inside the house. He saw her looking at his best friend, her facial expression turning into a disgusting one after she saw Tom fondling the girl’s bare arm.

“First girl that doesn’t find his flirting intriguing.” He thought.

He needed to talk to you. You were something else, he didn’t want to lose the chance.

Thank God he found the courage to say something, because now he wouldn’t be here sitting with you. Looking at the most engaging smile ever.

“Thank you.” You spoke, trying to calm yourself.

“So.. You and Tom?” He smirked rising his eyebrow, waiting for an answer.

Oh no he saw you staring.

Harrison was just curious. He saw the difference between you and other girls from college, but he still asked that.

“Me and him? God no! I’m his best friend.” You replied, putting on a disgusting face.

“Hey I don’t judge, just asking.” He put his hands up in in defence.

“But honestly, you don’t seem like that kind of girl.”

Now you were the one waiting for an answer.

“What I wanted to say is that you seem very bright. That the lame flirting attempts aren’t your weakness and that you’re not an attention seeker. You’re a girl who knows what she deserves. Gosh that sounded better in my head I’m sorry.” He chuckled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I just think that you’re pretty cute, not like the other girls here.”

This guy.

You couldn’t get enough of him. Hopefully he will be around here much more.

“That’s so sweet of you. Thank you Harrison, it turned out really nice.”

“Just the truth beautiful.” He smiled at you.

“Well, well, look what we have here.”

Tag List

@averyfosterthoughts

@i-cant-hangout-im-drumming

@timey-wimey-lovi

@rachaeldonnaspiteri1

@peterparker-rickybowen-mybabies

@sweetestscape

@quacksonhq

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@kaylinfayezink

@tomhollandthing

@stardustom

@hannahholland1811

@yoinkyourheart

@magicwithaknife

@thurstyforholland

@quaksonhehe

@fanficscuziranout

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eternallyrisen · 4 years ago

Text

6:00 AM - Wake up

Delano wakes up with a start. He rolls onto his back with a quiet hiss. What is it this time? What woke him up? Rats in the walls? Uneasy dream? Does it matter?

6:05 AM - Breakfast

Delano pours kibble into Fang and Spike’s bowls before he cooks bacon for himself. While the bacon cooks, he prepares a cup of instant coffee to go with his breakfast.

06:15 AM - Shower

He didn’t shower the previous night, so he has to shower now. The soap stings on where his skin broke last night while he was straining against the restraints.

06:20 AM - Leave the apartment

Delano pockets his phone, keys and wallet, recalls Fang and Spike into their pokeballs, gets his shoes on and steps out. After making sure his door is closed and locked, he makes his way out. Surprisingly, he doesn’t meet any neighbours passed out on the stairs or in the corridors, nor his landlord, who likes to stop Delano to complain about his habits. Coming home too late, being too noisy or paying rent too late, accusing him of feeding the rattatas in the walls.

06:30 AM - Second breakfast

Delano’s a big man. A little bacon and a cup of coffee never keeps him full for long. On his way to work, he stops by a konbini and gets a sandwich, along with an iced coffee from a vending machine.

06:40 AM - Arrive at work

Delano lets himself into Celadon Game Corner by the staff entrance at the back. He makes a beeline to the locker room and to his locker. Unceremoniously, he changes to work clothes.

06:45 AM - Doing the rounds

Delano checks that the Game Corner is as he left it last night. Everything seems to be in order, no one broke in last night. He meets some grunts on their way to the HQ through the secret entrance.

06:55 AM - Coffee

Delano gets a cup of coffee before opening.

07:00 AM - Open Game Corner

Delano will never understand why Game Corner has to be opened at seven fucking AM, but those are the rules. What Delano will also never understand is how and why there already are people waiting to get in and gamble. He hopes those people will get better soon.

1:00 PM - Lunch

After he makes sure someone competent will be left to watch for things, Delano steps out to get a bento box and a protein milkshake from a nearby konbini. He also gets an energy drink, but saves it for later.

1:23 PM - More caffeine

Delano notices he’s starting to nod off, so it’s time for the energy drink.

4:00 PM - Shift ends

Delano’s work days are mostly uneventful, and today is no exception. Delano’s shift ends without a hitch and he’s free to go. He changes back to his casual clothes and leaves.

4:10 PM - Class

Since Delano missed out on lots of education in his teens, he’s trying to make up for it now. He’s not having much success, to be honest.

6:10 PM - Groceries

Delano stops by a konbini and gets dinner supplies.

6:20 PM - Home again

Delano beelines to the kitchen and releases the dogs from their balls. They get fed before Delano starts cooking himself a simple dinner.

6:45 PM - Nap

After dinner, Delano ends up passing out for a bit. He has a lot of sleep debt, after all.

7:15 - Wake up

Delano wakes up with a quiet curse. He didn’t mean to fall asleep.

7:10 PM - Study

There’s still time to kill before the prime time for his side job. Might as well get some studying done meanwhile. The words keep jumbling and mixing in Delano’s eyes. Why do people keep reading and writing if it’s this hard??

8:20 PM - Call of the night life

Time for the side job. Delano puts on cologne and deodorant and leaves the apartment.

8:30 PM - At the club

The music is thumping, rattling in Delano’s chest and his head. He gets a drink, just to get a pleasant buzz on and to lower his rare, still-remaining inhibitions. Then he dives into the writhing mass of people on the dance floor.

8:45 PM - Someone takes the bait

Delano finds someone who seems interested. He’s kind of young, but luckily above the line Delano is comfortable with. He seems to have some internalized issues, with how his aggression seems more compensating than anything, but Delano isn’t here to figure that out. He doesn’t give a shit.

8:50 PM - False alarm

The guy seemingly gets cold feet, judging how he tells Delano he needs to take a leak, but clearly heads towards the exit of the night club. Whatever. Delano will find someone else.

9:10 PM - Let’s try that again

Delano manages to find a second guy who was more upfront with what he wants. Delano sucks him off in the restroom and gets 200 pokedollars for his troubles.

9:15 PM - Another guy

After the second dude fucks off after getting what he wants, Delano finds a third guy to flirt with. He ends up dancing with the guy for some time.

9:30 PM - Still dancing with him

Delano dances and flirts with the guy, hanging on to his every word, pretending that he’s already completely head over heels for him. It’s, of course, an act, a small ruse to make the client feel special and desirable. Some people like that, and it’s just another service Delano offers.

9:55 PM - Going home with him

The guy invited Delano to go with him. Delano accepts. The taxi ride to the guy’s apartment is spent in silence, but exchanging a few heated looks.

10:05 PM - His place

As soon as the door closes behind them, the guy is on Delano, hungrily kissing him. Hands pulling him close, exploring his torso, slipping under his shirt, pulling it up and off. They blindly stumble into the bedroom.

10:25 PM - Reclining

“Is this enough?” the guy asks, leafing a few bills to Delano.

Delano takes them and counts them. 500 pokedollars. “Yeah,” he says. “Thanks.”

The guy smooths his palm on Delano’s chest and kisses him. “Stay,” he whispers.

Delano places his hand on top of his. “I will.”

Delano waits until he falls asleep, then gets his clothes back on and quietly leaves.

10:45 PM - Red lights district

Right then. Another client. Delano meets with some co-workers while walking. It seems that one of Delano’s regulars isn’t out and about tonight.

11:05 PM - Text

Delano gets a text from another of his regulars, asking if he’s free.

i am. should i come over?

The usual place. 😘

Delano pockets his phone and starts making his way to the client’s apartment.

11:15 PM - At the client’s

“Hey, babe,” the client smiles as he lets Delano in.

“Hey, sexy,” Delano replies with a smirk.

The client’s smile gains a sharp edge. “On your knees,” he says.

Delano obliges.

11:40 PM - Cooldown

“Here’s your money,” the client says, throwing the wad of cash on the pillow.

Delano, still out of breath, grasps it with shaking hands. There are already bruises forming on his wrists.

“You should go,” the client says. “I have an early morning tomorrow.”

Delano grunts out an agreeing sound, carefully sitting up. He suppresses a groan as the movement pulls on his sore muscles. Without a word, Delano gathers his clothes, dresses and leaves.

As Delano makes his way out of the client’s apartment building, he counts how much he got paid. 1000 pokedollars. Not bad. He tucks the money away into his coat pocket before letting himself out on the night streets.

While he’s walking, Delano considers heading back to the red lights district, but he’s just too sore for more work. He heads home.

0:05 AM - Home

It took Delano longer than usual to get home because of his soreness and a new limp. When he finally makes it home, he would love nothing more than take a long soak in a hot bath, but he doesn’t have a tub. He’s not sure if his legs can keep him upright for a shower.

0:10 AM - Shower

Delano takes a warm shower, heavily leaning on the wall.

0:15 AM - More studying

Delano stumbles to the crate that serves as a table and picks up where his studies left off earlier. The letters and words still blend into each other and jumble into a flurry. Why does he keep doing this? He doesn’t even enjoy this.

0:50 AM - Tired

Delano is starting to nod off. He decides to call it a night and get to bed. He brushes his teeth and lies down on the sleeping bags that serve as his bed. He’s asleep before the clock turns to 2 AM.

#drabble #ic: delano #suggestive

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shytiff · 4 years ago

Text

Apr 2021 Wins

Started typing this on 4th apr lmaooo

1 - went to mcd. bought chicken + rice with the app promo. there’s a staff helping me on the order machine lol i feel badd there’s no need to do thatt. ate my lunchmade by mom at mcd’s muschola and went to sbux bcs its tumbler day. green tea latte w skim milk as usual. sent dr triya’s translation. ecmocard. started rereading goong (AGAIN. i probably have read it like 3 times minimum). still bring some feels

2 - its holiday today. spent almost the whole daylight rereading goong (turns out its pronounce ‘gung’ not ‘gong’ lol ive been wrong all this time) and finished it. the scene where they stare at each other, separated by the castle door, always gets me. got the old ipad charged (the screen are like 30% close to detaching and falling apart) and started AOT

3 - spent the whole day reading AOT. i like it when i have mini purposes in life (eg: finishing a manga series). AOT rly talks a lot about what do you want to do in life, the consequences of your choices and how you have to live with it. i felt triggered in a good way. the characters dont rly judge other’s choices, but they question them. discuss about it. give you some moral push. second gladi today. my vbg was still filpped hhhh. read aot until i felt sleepy and fell asleep. woke up very near subuh and prayed isya. my toxic trait is the horrible self care (and im talking bare minimum lol hehe lmao)

4 - finished aot. Asked irun about some aot explanations and she sent 5 paragraphs in one bubble. Slept. Flavola, kopsus coklat and somay. Also ate japota honey butter. Did 1 long input of ecmocard. Followed baepsae choreo. Moved my body a bit. Wow im not immediately sleeping. Amazing

5 - arrived at harkit 11-ish and went back about 1pm loll. super hungry when im arriving in kalideres. bought tahu colek worth 3000 (i wonder how the seller hears me through my 2 layers of mask), roti sisir and some ice cream in alfamidi. my fitlife protein powder ran out again. its my 2nd already. did some ecmocard, wasted my time after maghrib

6 - woke up late. did not have the mental strength to go to harkit so i decided to just stay home. bought sbux 1L green tea and macchiato. wasted the daylight and finally did some ecmocard in the evening,,,,

7 - off to harkit 7.30-ish pm in the rain. Took some data for ecmocard. Went to salemba to get tabung and surat bebas pustaka. Had breakfast slash lunch first, tried guudfuud (red rice, beef and omega egg). I like that the rice was not too much. Met up w ness ren and talked about isip dilemmas at sky. Afterwards went to flavola. Ordered mie rebus and roasted milk tea cause i somehow feel sooo hungry and in need of calories. It tasted so good, i was sitting in my usual seat facing the window, and the sky was a mixture of blue and grey. Brought croissant and sakura pocky at indomart. Ate the bread immediately after indomie. Went back home. Juan brought tahu gejrot that was delicious and crunchy. Internship files briefing by akis. Fell asleep

8 - woke up. Saw that dr retha was up for interview. Panicked. Thankfully it was at 12. I left home at 9:40 ish and arrived 11:50. Its a long ass way. Turns out i was interviewed with ka agassi. The doctors are so kind. They explained the gist of anesthesiology profession, and how its a choice you make, and its okay as long as you like what you do. Tried halo bowl for lunch. Sous vide chicken, rice, caesar sauce, beef bacon, and the deliciouss butter broccoli. Went back to kalideres and to starbucks. I only spent <2 hrs in there (a waste of money, i know). Bought decaf hazelnut latte (apparently the beans were kenyan something? Medium?) and butter croissant (need to cushion my stomach). Did GCP certification and sent it to the ever so kind mba Ai. Still got energy from the caffeine, did some ecmocard, read quran, read.... Toji fanfic 🤦‍♀️

9 - went to rsf w mom. We took the wrong way and had to take the long way but thank god theres still time to spare. Met dr rara. Some briefing. Went to rscm w agassi, submitted files for ijazah, went back to RSF. Girlll the cost of transport. MRT: 12K. Grab: 16-17k. Thats one way trip. Bought food at rsf canteen. Eocru briefing by the research coordinator. Ward tour w dr retha. Snacked on ovaltine provided by mba ai. Went home after maghrib by tj. Liqo along the way. Glad bersih (came late). Drank macchiato for some strength but still fell asleep quickly.i shouldnt have laid down

10 - kebakaran jenggot in the morning due to green screen positioning. Finally got the appropriate setup (after many fabric tries and cutting my mukena) at 08:30. Finished showering 08:45. Zoom was opened at 9 lmao. Somehow finished before 09:30. Zoompah w mom and dad along side me. After its ovee, some "photoshoot" w fam. At this point i was truly rly sleepy. Took of my makeup. Changed my clothes. And then racil silv dev showed up lol. I got gifts c: and then atikah came. And then i redid my makeup, this time with the help of friends to create fantastic eye make up look (which i can never pull off). Eyebrows by sil, eyeshadow and liner by cheldev lol. Took some photos. Dajen came. Talked. Videocalled w pupuy. A surprise gift from fianti came. And then chel dajen went back at 8. Still cant sleep. Slept at like 11-12

11 - lazed. Woke up, ate pizza (mom bought 2 of phd's 1m pizza) and bakwan, slept again. Matcha latte and ecmocard. Watched a bit of 2nd sinau

12 - off to rsf at 06:20. Arrived 07:15 ish. Lunch was ayam penyet accompanied by snacks that mba ai bought. Off to harkit at 14:05 (bcs my laptop somehow shut down and i lost all the unsubmitted data). And then off to kalideres at 15:30 ish to meet up w clara and search for clothes for almira's wedding. Went to lippo bcs clar saw this dress that kinda looks like the brokat given. We ate at ramen ya. It doesnt rly make you feel full, the filliny sensation was kinda like indomie. Saw that the dress looked different. Ate 1 boba pancake together at banban. Continued on to the tailor in kebon jeruk. The location was in an alley, and it was raining lol. Quoting clara: "the unnecessary struggles". The tailor was quite helpful (and she looks experienced). Arrived at clara's at 8 ish. Picked up by mom with car (it was raining) and arrived at abt 9. Hurriedly showered and tarawih and tidied up AND ITS ONLY 09:45. Its crazy how efficient one use time (and at the same time, how wasteful one can be)

13 - first day of fasting. The morning was spent taking samples. I stupidly took a sample thats not yet labeled im sorry :(((( i felt kinda tired and wanted to give up this. Give up anesthesia. Went back home at 14:00 and its cloudy. The bus was the nicer types and it was COLD. Read quran along the way. Picked up by juan. Opened laptop. And then its iftar time. I was sooo sleey and the tarawih was so long thst i closed my eyes along the way. Fianti called after tarawih, we talked til abt 21:30. And then i fell asleep

14 - went to rscm. Submitted serkom files. Met dr dyah and i hope we could somehow meet her again if we study in fkui again aamiin. Went to rsf by mrt. Arrived in lebak bulus just before it was raining. The bus took a while to arrive (usually theyre there, waiting). Its still raining like crazy so i took grabcar to AR from pesakih (39k). Played with my phone til iftar. Played phone again after tarawih and fell asleep

15 - i felt rlyy lazy and cant bring myself to wake up. Off to rsf at 07:15. There were coordinator ppl. Took sample. It was raining when i went back but i took grabbike from kalideres. Wasted my time and did not do ecmocard

16 - sampling. Snacked on keripik pisang at the room. Went back early at 13:15 ish. Picked up by juan. Sleeeept (and this is before the nightmareish mistake began)

17 - i did a mistake by telling dr retha (who took the sample today) the wrong patient (it switched in my unreliable memory. I feel terrible. Thank god shes quite chill abt it (?). Read jujutsu kaiseeen. Went to flavola. Did 1 ecmocard. Went to bandar jakarta baywalk by motorbike. Spent 135k and was quite full with many varieties. Arrived home at about 20:50. Turns out juan also had bukber with his friends. Phone call with fiiii, talked abt dimrob

18 - lazed all day, read jjk, finished my part of ecmocard (gave genky to ekal cause i was a dumbass at getting data). Ate mom's mentai rice, siomay. Drank green tea latte. Read jjk til 145 (mentok) at night. Proceeds to consume all things jjk lmaoo

19 - we took sooo long to get samples. Finished at 13:00. Went to rm with dr rara. Went back home. Watched the third sinau. Read the IMMACULATE jjk fics by celestialmechanics im IN LOVEEEE with the way s/he writes ughhhh

20 - samples took faster than usual. Mba ai did not came today. Went to RM and did some work there. Off to AR by 15:00. Arrived close to maghrib. Did not do any work afterwards lmao. Did not even wash my face

21 - magang as usual. Note to self: sit on the right side of the bus. Did nothing yesterday. Felt like shit after tarawih (but i showered before maghrib!!)

22 - todays problem was the swab sample not being there even though the staff allegedly already took it. Huft. Took a shower and out on vitacid (i cant remember the kast time i put on vitacid 😳 its probably been... a week or two?

23 - samples finished quite quickly. Already going home at 12. Lazedddd and lazed and lazed. Waited for emir to pick me up so i went to dm. Read an immaculate itadori x megumi fix thats just full of feels. Started demon slayer lets see

24 - literally just laid in bed reading manga and seeing tiktok and slept again and suddenly its 1 am. Showered. Still in a lazy mode. Havent begun clires work. Watched leah's vlog that said "go do things youve been putting off!". Finally finished the third and last video of Sinau Yuk ICU class with dr. Zeta, SpAn lolll even though the actual last class was on 7th apr. iftar was fish and chips and salad yuum

25 - woke up at like 1am since i slept too much yesterday. Ate tan ek tjoan bread and drank sbux matcha latte. Did some intern work. Read a bit of quran. Sahur. Cant even sleep again so i showered. Off with mom and dad (09:30) since dad’s going to get vaccinated at skk migas. Mom drove me to ara’s place (11:00). Talked a bit and even read quran again there. Off to GI (13:00) to meet up w regen. Walked around. Bought a discounted TBS green tea facial wash. Went back home by TJ (16:00). the bus station is a bit closer now. Arrived home close to maghrib (17:30). hurriedly showered and went to sleep (properly) after tarawih. A good good sleep since i got 9400 steps today and that tired me out lmaooo (bare minimum yall, i know).

26 - woke up still sleepy. Slept again after iftar and woke up at 07:30. Skipped shower and off to RSF lmao. Went to medical record. Walked to the front of RSF originally planning to go to lebak bulus by angkot but i saw none. So i went through mrt instead. Stopped by at kebon jeruk and walked 800 meter (that tireeed me and made me feel parched under the sun) to risma busana for clothes fitting. Took gojek to jembatan gantung (turns out the closer halte to flyover was taman kota). Iftar was chicken noodle and risol and banana and i felt fullll and i slept

27 - today is off day since im alternating with agassi. read quran. watched shadow and bone (with 1,5x speed except for kanej and matthias nina scenes). didnt rly do any magang work except the table asked by dr retha. i feel like usually im operating on 70%. sleeping more doesnt rly add that. i need caffeine or physical activity. before i know it, its close to iftar.

28 - i ((felt)) like i had a decent amount of energy today. shouldve done some work between sahur and leaving the house but i ended up reading vampire knight lmaoooo the scenes had no business bringing so much butterflies. sampling together w agassi. mba ai didnt come in today. after agassi left did some magang work. i also went to RM to ask for more RM to bu dian. took angkot to lebak bulus for the first time. paid 5k. i had no idea which angkot went to lebak bulus and the driver (somehow knowing the right words to say) said “lebak bulus lebak bulus”. didnt read much quran on the way back. i just close my eyes and relaxed. felt kinda low on sugar. watched more shadow and bone on the way back and at home until close to iftar. didnt do anything after tarawih. slept hoping i woke up early (which i did, at 3am. but i slept again)

29 - im supposed to have ample energy but i just stuck around my bed until its time to get ready to go. read some kanej fic lol. I dont rly do anything productive after arriving home

30 - made intern log, magang as usual. Did not go to rm. Finished watching shadow and bone. Rested bcs tomorrow's saturdayyy

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

Text

996

This is originally an ask game that’s making the rounds here on Tumblr, but in this blog of course I answer everything. Quarantine Ask Game; questions by ghostly-nblm What’s your go-to snack? I haven’t really have one throughout this lockdown. I just snack on whatever’s available in our pantry - usually we have potato chips, salted egg chips, nuts, etc. And then sometimes my dad will whip up something for us himself, like wicked Oreos, churros, corndogs, and chocolate chip cookies. What’s a movie you could watch over and over? I could probably watch The Proposal everyday for the rest of my life and I doubt you’ll hear a complaint out of me. It’s just so funny, so lighthearted, and the entire cast meshes very well together. Favorite show to binge? Again when it comes to comfort shows/movies, I pick the lighthearted ones because they get me to relax and laugh a lot. That said, my favorite show to binge would be Friends. I recently started binge-watching it again and it feels good to come back to it after several months of not seeing an episode. 5 songs that make you want to dance? Shut Up And Dance - Walk the Moon Cinnamon - Hayley Williams Don’t Start Now - Dua Lipa Caught in the Middle - Paramore 7/11 - Beyoncé So, basically, Top 40 shit because it’s that genre that produces the most dance-y songs anyway. Pls don’t judge lmaaaaaao I like other artists I swear

5 songs that make you feel less lonely? I don’t know if I’ve ever turned to music to feel less lonely...I never really seek out that particular feeling. If anything, I listen to certain songs because I feel alone and I would want it to stay that way for the meantime.

Favorite meal to cook yourself? I always blank out at these cooking questions because I don’t know how to make anything, soz. When I start earning my own money I swear I’ll start experimenting with ingredients in the kitchen. You heard it here first. Seriously guys, when I finally get a stable income and you notice me spending it on unnecessary shit, feel free to nag me and tell me to start cooking!!! How do you “treat yourself”? With food. Food has always been my reward to myself after a long week, a hard exam, a bloody presentation, and basically after getting through something I had been dreading for a long time. Favorite thing to do when doing self care? Surveys. Who have you been talking to the most? My family, I guess. “The most” is really pushing it though; I don’t talk a lot these days and it’s been difficult for me to sustain a conversation and not drain my battery in the middle of it. One thing you really miss right now? The past. I normally don’t think about it, but if there’s something from the past that I do miss, I end up pining hard for it. If you could be self-isolated with anyone who would it be? Angela. We haven’t seen one another in seven months so we could definitely do with spending seven months together lmao. We miss the shit out of each other. Do you have any pets? Yes :) Small update on my dogs: so for the last four months Kimi has hated having Cooper around and snarls every time he senses he’s nearby. But, and we have no clue what changed, now he has started humping Cooper and wants to be near him all the time...ugh. Favorite video games? At the early early phase of the lockdown I played Mario Kart 8 on the Switch all day long. Then for some reason I stopped and I haven’t played since like April. I haven’t played other video games. Favorite podcasts? Ear Biscuits. Andi has also started their own podcast and it debuted like a week ago; it looks extremely promising, but I’m super behind since I’ve deleted all my socials. I’ll catch up once I’m in the right state of mind and am feeling better enough to come back on my accounts. Favorite YouTubers? The main channels I watch are Good Mythical Morning and The Try Guys. But throughout the quarantine sooooooo many local celebrities have started their own vlog channels and majority of them are super fun to watch. My faves would be Andi Manzano’s, Manny Pacquiao’s daughter Mary’s, and Bea Alonzo’s. Wake up time? These days I try to be out of bed by 8:30 so I can sufficiently prepare and clean up for work, but early on in the lockdown I liked staying up all night and then waking up at like 9 or 10 AM. Sleep time? Anywhere from 10 PM to 1 AM. If you could go anywhere right now where would it be? I’d be in Sagada, vacationing by myself and doing some hiking, spelunking, reflecting, and soul-searching. I wish I can go back there someday; I just reallllly need to be out of the house and out of the city for a while.

What’s a change you want to keep when self isolation is over? There is nothing I wish to keep from this quarantine. It turned my entire life around and I wish I had all the things I had before it instead. Have you learned something? Yeah. Some of them the hard way. Any new skills? I took up a course on marketing last month so that was a lot of fun. Hobby-wise, I’ve been thinking of getting into cross-stitching so I can’t wait to buy my own kit and start with that. I’m also learning a lot of new and super helpful skills at work, like coming up with PR tactics/executions, knowing what will work for a client and what wouldn’t, photo editing, etc. It’s been the best internship experience ever. What’s a hobby you’d like to start learning? ^ The latter. I’d also love to learn how to bake, and maybe? start a vlog because it’d be nice to have an outlet where I can express myself and do new things while sharing my experiences with other people. What’s something you’d like to get better at? I constantly want to improve at my job because perfectionism. What food do you wish you had right now? Coffee shop pastries. :( God I haven’t had one of those in a while; I miss them loads. Your go to quarantine outfit? I don’t have one but man, when I do go out I tend to overdress because I rarely get an opportunity or have a reason to drive out these days, so I allow myself to look cute and all dressed up even if I’m just meant to pick up food at my grandma’s or something. What have you done today? I’ve been taking this survey, taken a shower, cried for a half hour, played with Cooper, cradled Kimi like a baby, checked my emails, and taken a few sips of coffee. Any plans for tomorrow? Work work work. What’s on your “to watch” list? The second volume of Unsolved Mysteries is finally out on Netflix so I’m hoping I get around to watching a few episodes soon. Any musicians/bands you’ve discovered? Most recent one was Chase Atlantic but I discovered them like back in July. Since I’m not listening to a lot of music these days, I’m not expecting to find new bands or singers to get into any time soon. Post a selfie right now!! Eh. Post pictures of your pets! I don’t feel like raking through my photos this morning. Maybe some other time. When was the last time you drank water? Last night at dinner. When was the last time you ate? Last night. When was the last time you got up and stretched? I can’t remember when I last did that. I usually stretch in bed, though.

Favorite song right now? This has been asked on every damn survey recently. I’m sure you’ll find my answer within the first page of my blog. Favorite social media to scroll through? It used to be Twitter until the lockdown hit and everyone stopped going out and having interesting updates. Before I deactivated everything, I loved spending time on Facebook. What’s the last thing you ate? A slice of pizza. What’s the weather like where you are? It’s a little cloudy and cold. I’m expecting it to rain today. Have you been playing animal crossing? No, but I know so many people who have been. How are you feeling? 50% meh, 50% just going through the motions. Who’s the last person you texted? Ate Alyanna. We’re both going through rough patches at the moment so we were cheering one another up. I needed that positivity a lot this morning and I’m glad we had that interaction. What does your last text message say with no context? ”Waaaaaaaa cute” Post a meme that made you laugh recently:

Outdoor activity you’d like to do right now? Hiking, mountain climbing, camping. Anything that’ll help me get disconnected from the world for a few days, really. Something you’re looking forward to when quarantine is over? Doing all those ^, traveling, being able to actually go to a workplace (once I have one), seeing my friends, going to bars again. Someone you’d like to see when quarantine is over? Everybody, man. I don’t give a shit as to who it is. Any new games coming out you want to play? Not really. I’m just waiting on GTA 6 even though there’s been like 0 updates on that front. New shows you’ve discovered? I revisited The Crown, but that’s it. I haven’t discovered anything new. Most comfortable piece of clothing you have? I find all of them comfortable; that’s why I wear them at home haha.

#survey #surveys

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alwaysgcld · 4 years ago

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🦋🧦💡🗑 for Henry~

🦋 a loving text.

[ to: Henry | July 20th, 3:30 pm ] Would you and Daisy like to come over for dinner tonight?

[ to: Henry | July 20th, 3:30 pm ] Or I could make something and bring it over if you’d prefer. Just in case you’re worried about bringing Daisy around Iseul since she’s a big dog.

[ to: Henry | July 20th, 3:31 pm ] I just thought with it being your first day back you might like a moment to relax and not worry about making dinner for the two of you.

[ to: Henry | July 20th, 3:35 pm ] Whatever you decide, I would like to treat you to a welcome home dinner at some point.

🧦 a half-asleep text.

[ to: Henry | September 17th, 11:50 pm ] I know today was a tough day and that you’re probably already sleeping it off.

[ to: Henry | September 17th, 11:52 pm ] There’s something I can’t get out of my head though so I’m just going to say it and you don’t have to acknowledge it or anything, I’m just saying it otherwise I won’t be able to fall asleep .

[ to: Henry | September 17th, 11:53 pm ] You don’t have to hold back or hide your tears around me, okay? I wasn’t sure if the reason you were doing that because you thought you couldn’t, so that’s why I felt the need to say that.

[ to: Henry | September 17th, 11:55 pm ] You’re my friend, one my closest friends here, and I will always be here for you, no matter what. So if you need a shoulder to cry on, you can count on me.

💡 a scared text.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:15 am ] Can I call you?

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:15 am ] Sorry, I know it’s super early, even for my standards.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:16 am | UNSENT ] I just had this nightmare about you getting hurt and I just need to hear your voice right now. Need to know that you’re okay.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:16 am | UNSENT ] I just had this terrifying dream and I just want to hear your voice right now. I know just talking to you would make me feel better.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:19 am ] I just had this grim dream and need someone to talk to.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:21 am ] Wait no, it’s still the middle of the night for you. I am so sorry, I forgot about the time difference. Just ignore all that.

[ to: Henry | November 3rd, 4:25 am ] If you’re up for it later in the day though, I would like to talk to you.

🗑️ a text that wasn’t sent.

[ to: Henry | July 17th 2019, 11:05 pm ] Thank you once again for the birthday cake, Henry. It really made my day.

[ to: Henry | July 17th 2019, 11:11 pm | UNSENT ] I still can’t get the smile you had on your face when you gave it to me out of my head. Part of me wishes I could, because I know why I can’t stop thinking about it. That the truth of the matter is I’ve been thinking about your smile an awful lot lately. That the feelings have been budding for awhile. For the sake of our friendship, I’m never going to tell you this and just bury it deep within until it just stops. But I just had to put it into words once. That I like you. I like you more than I should. I’m sorry.

#qvietlight #🎕 meme #🎕 ( ben & henry )#i assumed daisy left on the 17th since the self para was on that day #<3

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cherishtaengs · 5 years ago

Text

New Year

Pairing: Taeyang x Reader (Y/N)

Warnings: None

—

[10:40 pm]

You take another glance at your phone, greeted with your lock screen and the time in bright, white numbers. No text, no call, blank notification screen. Just like all the other times you'd checked.

For the past half hour, you'd been sitting in the park, shivering through your jacket and wool sweater. Snow fell lightly around you, dusting the ground and melting to tiny droplets on your cheeks. You didn't know how much longer you could wait; the crisp wind was driving the cold deep into your bones through any opening it could find in your layers of clothing. Even though it was late, the city was bustling with nightlife. People laughed and strolled through the park, enjoying each other's company on a white New Year's Eve.

You sighed.

Taeyang was supposed to meet you at the park at 10:30, and you'd even gotten there early. Both of you had wanted to spend the last night of the year together, and the date had been planned a week in advance. But he hadn't shown up, hadn't even called or texted to let you know he'd be late.

A minute later, you pulled your phone out again, knowing there was no point in doing so and being met with the same empty notification screen. Leaning back, you watched the small flecks of snow drift down from grey clouds. They seemed to be in no hurry to fall to the ground, they just fluttered ever so gently in the brisk air.

Maybe you'd wait a little longer.

[11:05]

Your phone buzzed its two, quick notes, drawing your attention to a new text. Heart jumping in your chest, you unlock your phone- but quickly sank back against your seat.

TY: Hey

TY: Something really last minute came up, sorry I didn't text earlier

TY: I'm really really sorry I can't come tonight :(

Your pulse started racing, anger and irritation bubbling up right under your skin. You couldn't believe it- the absolute nerve of him to make you wait for nearly an hour, just to cancel on you last minute! And with the worst explanation, too. You were used to Taeyang being forgetful and sometimes being late to dates, but he was never the type to stand you up when it came to more important things. Hell, you'd passed on spending the night with your closest friends just to be with Taeyang. And now he was telling you he couldn't make it? You silently seethed, blood rushing hot to your face.

You: Ok. I'm going home.

You: See you later.

You hoped that he'd catch on to how upset you were- he'd have to be a rock to not realize that you'd be angry. But right then, you just wanted to get out of the cold and back into the warm comfort of your apartment. Maybe you could make some hot chocolate and watch a movie or something and get a good night's sleep. You'd figure out your thoughts in the morning.

Stuffing your phone into your coat pocket, you pushed yourself off the bench and made your way through the park, out into the street. If you hurried, you could probably catch the next bus that would take you right to your street. It was usually a short ride home, you lived about 10 minutes away by bus, but you knew the traffic would slow you down. Making sure you didn't slip, you half-run, half-walk to the bus station, reaching it right as the bus pulled up, sides decorated with lights to celebrate the new year. You pulled yourself into the bus, relieved that it was relatively empty. Only a handful of other passengers were riding tonight, scattered in different window seats.

Dropping yourself into the seat closest to the door, you cross your arms across your chest and ignore the two short vibrations coming from your pocket.

[11:35]

Yours was the fourth stop and since everyone else had gotten off before you, you'd been left on the bus alone. You were starting to sense a pattern tonight.

There was even a stark difference between your apartment and your neighbors'; nearly everyone else had their lights on, shadows moving behind their curtains. But your windows were dark, no sign of life for the night. You'd been trying to hold it back, but the disappointment and sadness came creeping back up on you.

On any other day, you'd be understanding if Taeyang had cancelled last minute- you were sure he'd find a way to make it up to you, because he was sweet like that. If he thought he'd made you even the slightest bit upset, he would make sure to talk to you face-to-face and clear things up. So this kind of flakey behavior was unexpected, but if it was any other day you knew you would have forgiven him. But tonight? New Year's Eve? When you had this planned for days?

He'd have some serious explaining to do whenever you felt like texting him next.

Brushing the powdery snow off your coat, you turn your key in the lock and push open the door, greeted by more silence and darkness. Sighing, you kick off your shoes and throw your coat onto the back of your couch. You didn't even bother to turn on the lights, just dropped yourself on the couch to clear your mind. You sat there for some time, restless and agitated. Sulking on the couch wasn't helping, so you went to the fridge to get milk for hot chocolate. When you opened the fridge, something small fluttered to the floor.

Startled, you stepped back, bending to get a better view of what fell. In the golden light of the fridge, you saw that it was a piece of paper folded in a square. You didn't remember leaving a note for yourself before leaving.

Unfolding the paper, you read what was on it: Hot chocolate?

Sucking in a breath, you realized what was going on. You crumple up the paper and march out of the kitchen, slamming the fridge door shut.

"Yoo Taeyang," you shout, crossing your arms and planting yourself in the hallway. "Get out here right now!"

No one came out of anywhere, but you did hear the tell-tale sound of socked feet shuffling in your room. Taeyang was never very good at hiding or staying quiet when he had to.

"Taeyang, I'm serious," You roll your eyes and walk to the door of your room, waiting outside it. "I'm not in the mood."

Whatever he was planning, you wanted none of it. You weren't the least bit happy with him tonight, and you mentally prepared yourself for that goofy smile you knew he would give you.

Turning the doorknob, you throw open the door and sigh in exasperation, seemingly for the hundredth time tonight. "Taeyang, please."

You didn't know what you expected to see when you opened the door to your room, but what you actually did see was not it.

There was nothing. Well, everything in your room was still there, but there wasn't anything else. That was it. And for some reason, something in your heart dropped into the pit of your stomach. You supposed a part of you was hoping that he had tried to make it up to you, and had prepared something extra special. But of course not. Tonight was just a big disappointment.

"Taeyang, where are you," You called into the dark room, looking around, hiding the disappointment you felt. "We need to talk."

You heard the hushed sliding of the door to your balcony and his voice followed, soft and slightly nervous. "Yeah, I guess we do."

You turned to face him and saw his apologetic expression, exactly what you braced yourself for. It wouldn't work this time, not unless he gave you a serious explanation. He tipped his head, gesturing for you to join him. The clock on your table read 11:50, and you met him on the small balcony. The wind was biting, and you were glad you left your sweater on.

"Hot chocolate?" Taeyang asked, holding out a mug of still hot drink. He had set up a small table outside, with two chairs. But that was it. You take the mug and sit down before he offered a seat.

"Why'd you stand me up today," you wanted to get straight to the point.

Taeyang, however, leaned back in his chair across from you and took a sip of his hot chocolate, taking his time to gaze over the rooftops in front of him. "The view is great from up here, right. Especially when it snows, don't you think?"

You stare at him, not believing what you were hearing. He was ignoring your question, and he only did that when there was something he didn't want to tell you. "Taeyang, stop it. Or I'm going back inside."

Taeyang glanced at you from the top of his cup, brown eyes glittering with the reflection of scattered lights. When he set it down and the soft smile returned to his lips, you had to remind yourself you were mad.

"Ok," he leaned his chin on his hand, looking at you intently. There was a suspicious look in his eyes, a funny lift to his eyebrows that you couldn't quite place. "I'm sorry I didn't show up today."

A crisp gust of wind blew, chilling you through your thick sweater, sending a shiver down your body. You wrapped your hands around the warm cup, welcome heat spreading to your palms. "What was the emergency?"

Taeyang cast his gaze down to his hands, resting on the table top. You noticed he was fidgeting with a loose string on the sleeve of his sweater. He took another moment to answer, talking anxiously. "Well, there was something I had to do. It wouldn't have been right if I didn't do it tonight. I knew you'd understand."

He... knew you'd understand? He just assumed that you would be okay with waiting alone in the park, in the freezing cold, for almost an hour? This just had to be the icing on today's horrible cake.

"Well, you know what," you shake your head, fighting to keep your voice calm. "I don't. I don't understand."

Taeyang only stared back at you, biting his lower lip. The gleam faded from his widened eyes and his brows were furrowed in worry. He genuinely looked innocent right then, but you weren't going to be swayed by a few cute expressions.

You continued, anger and frustration seeping into every word you said. "We planned this two weeks ahead! If you knew you wouldn't have been able to make it tonight, you could have told me earlier! I would've been fine if you'd even told me this morning, or this afternoon. But, I told my friends I'd be spending the night with you instead of them, and I was actually looking forward to being with you, but I guess you had other plans? Why didn't you just tell-"

In one swift motion, Taeyang had stood up and leaned over the table to press his soft lips to yours. When he pulled back, the apologetic smile was back on his face and you wished it would either stay there or go away. In the moment's pause where you caught your breath, you saw the faint sparkle of snowflakes resting on strands of his dark hair and eyelashes, light puffs of breath disappearing between you two. You forgot the cold, warmth spreading from your lips across your face.

"I knew you'd be mad at me," Taeyang sighed, finally sitting back down. "And I really didn't want to do that to you. But, ironically, I did it for you. The emergency was for you. Or, you were the emergency- Well, I'm not sure how to phrase that, but I'm serious. I really am sorry, but I had to."

You recovered from the shock of the kiss, twice as angry as before. Abruptly, you stood up, pushing the chair back with a screech. "I don't know what you're talking about, and clearly you don't either. So come talk to me when you've worked out an excuse that makes sense."

You turned to go, but of course before you could make it through the door you felt Taeyang's hand wrap around yours. "It's 11:56. I have an excuse, and I think it's a good one."

He dropped his hand and waited for you to turn around. You did, arms crossed and eyebrow raised, mouth twisted in a frown. "Well?"

That nervous look fell across his face again, and he picked at the string on his sleeve, fingers clamped down on the cuff. "Do you remember when we first met? It was tonight. No, I mean, it was New Years Eve, but two years ago. You were walking out of that bar with your friends-"

Of course you remembered that. You remembered the way the two of you had ran right into each other, and Taeyang had spilled his coffee on your jacket. He'd gotten so red, so flustered, and his friends were between laughing at him and apologizing to you when he just stood there, sputtering like a goldfish. You both knew of each other, you were in a few of the same classes in college, but you'd never spoken before then. You'd felt bad after seeing how embarrassed he'd been and told him it was okay, you could wash the jacket at home. But he insisted you'd take his coat instead and he'd wash yours for you, it was the least he could do.

You weren't exactly sure why he offered to do that- after all, the two of you weren't close in any way. But he insisted, and that was how you went home in his too large, but warm, coat, and he went home shivering with your jacket and no coffee. It gave you both an excuse to see each other again. And again, and again.

You'd never forget that night, and that was exactly why you'd really wanted to be with him this New Year's Eve. But he'd ruined it.

Taeyang continued, eyes focused on yours. "And at some point after we became friends, I promised you I'd learn a magic trick for you because you said you thought that one magician we saw on the street was cool. Do you remember that?"

No, actually, you didn't remember that at all.

"I've made a whole lot of other promises to you since we starting dating, and I'd like to think I've kept them all. Well, except tonight, but in my defense we are together right now and I swear it was for a good cause."

You honestly had no idea what he was trying to say to you, but you decided to let him keep talking. The way his cheeks flushed pink and the tips of his ears got red was cute.

He stopped pulling at the loose string and reached for your hand.

"I learned that magic trick I promised you I'd learn," he lifted his other hand, with the fingers tight around the cuff, to your ears. "Not sure if it's going to work out right but, here it is."

You assumed he was going to pull something out from behind your ear, and that made you impatient. All of this for a dumb trick? Did he think this was all a joke?

Before your thoughts could rant any more, Taeyang pushed back your hair and brushed his fingers behind your ear. But instead of producing something, you heard something fall to the ground and Taeyang whispered a curse.

"Seriously, Taeyang," you rolled your eyes as he dropped to the floor to pick up whatever it was that fell. "I'm going to bed."

"No no no," He grabbed for you again, this time holding tight. "It's almost time. And I want you to have this."

Biting his lip, Taeyang held up what he dropped. It was a small box, velveteen and black. You flicked your eyes up to him, wide and confused. "What is it?"

Taeyang exhaled sharply, a cloud escaping from his lips and vanishing just as quickly. "I'm sorry for breaking tonight's promise. I really am. But I've had this moment planned for two weeks, too. After all of those promises I've made to you over the years, I want to make another. One I'll make a priority to keep."

He pushed the top of the box open, and what was inside stole your breath in the best way.

It was a silver ring, thin and polished, with a single twist lined with small, sparkling diamonds. A promise ring.

"What-" you didn't have the words to finish your question, so you just let it hang in the cold air.

"You mean the world to me," Taeyang whispered. "And I'm sorry for all the times I've hurt you, in any way. This is my way of promising that I'll never leave you alone again. You can be mad at me if you want, but just let me have this little victory tonight?"

You stare at the ring, unsure if you should laugh or cry. If this was what he was planning for all of today... you knew it was unfair of him to have not warned you he'd be late ahead of time, but now you knew there was a reason behind it. He meant well, he always did.

You heard the neighbor's music die down, a quick moment of silence falling across the entire complex. It didn't last for long; the countdown was starting.

"10, 9, 8-"

You grinned up at Taeyang, and he took the ring out of its cushion, an expectant glimmer in his eyes.

"7, 6, 5-"

"Well, put it on me!" You held up your left hand, smile widening as a fluttering filled your chest and stomach. Laughing, Taeyang slipped the ring onto your finger.

"3, 2, 1-"

Throwing your arms around his neck, you pull Taeyang down for a kiss, embracing his warmth all around you. Taeyang wrapped one arm around your waist, holding you close. With the other, he held the back of your neck, brushing your cheek softly. He smiled into the kiss, pulling back slightly.

"Are you still mad at me?" He asked, the hint of a mischievous pout clear in his voice.

"Hmm," you pretended to give it some thought. "Yes. But not as much as before."

At that, he laughed and despite yourself, so did you.

Maybe tonight wasn't such a disappointment after all.

#fantasylibrary #sf9 #kpop #sf9 au #sf9 taeyang #sf9 youngbin #sf9 inseong #sf9 jaeyoon #sf9 dawon #sf9 rowoon #sf9 juho #sf9 zuho #sf9 hwiyoung #sf9 chani

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joshslater · 5 years ago

Text

The Cupbearer

This is a relay, doing a continuation of tamed-jock’s continuation of jd07201990′s story. Similar stories and bonus material on my Patreon.

Infection+2:25

Let's write a captains log, like Tyler and I used to do, only this time I have actual observations and events to record. It is now approximately 2 hours and 25 minutes since he placed the cup on me. I immediately went home, and have done some preliminary studies of the object.

My most immediate concern is the attachment mechanism. I can really only think of three, suction, adhesion or some sort of mechanical attachment to my... thing. Observations are a bit limited as the object responds to stimulii. In the first instance when I grabbed it in the rest room there wasn't much of a response. The feeling was similar to that of a vacuum pull in the whole area, but I'm not feeling a constant force as I would expect from vacuum. Also, when the cup was applied it felt like it was filled with, or quickly filled up with a gel of some sort.

Wanting to rule out vacuum, or in best case break the vacuum and remove the object, I attempted to insert a narrow tube from my model steam engine in between the skin and the object. That did provoke a response. It felt like the contents of the cup was rapidly replaced or infused with icy-hot gel. This entry has been delayed by approximately 40 minutes, as I have been lying on my bed and desperately trying to avoid touching it. Every time I fail I get like a pulse of renewed icy-hot in the cup.

Infection+2:50

I've decided to avoid further experiments and focus on observation and external research. The cup itself appears to be mix of carbon fiber, titanium and some other fairly high tech materials. This points to high tech origin, but beside the logotype I find no other markings like brand, manufacturer, patents, serial number etc. My first attempts to Google this kind of product or stories from someone with similar experience come up short. I took a picture of the logo, cleaned it up and sent it through USPTO image search to see if anyone has a trademark on it, but came up empty as well.

It sure smells bad. I need to come up with an excuse for mum.

Infection+6:00

I told mum that I'm having my scent-month, as if every teenage boy has one. I said Tyler just had his, so if she checks with his parents they will confirm it. Why does it smell so bad though? It is clearly the cup that emits it, since the smell came on pretty strong only seconds after Tyler attached it. Is it distraction? Is it to mask something else? Is it to make the wearer body conscious or odor conscious and avoid contact with other people? Is it to acclimate the wearer to the smell? I don't see how I can answer any of these questions purely from observation though. Something to sleep on perhaps. How do you pee with this thing?

Infection+6:15

So the pee just kind of filters out in the lower part of the cup. If you want to use a toilet you have to basically sit on it reverse, do you thing, and then wait a few minutes for it all to drain out. A big drawback is that you have to step out of pants and boxers to even sit reverse on a toilet.

Infection+10:20

I think the damn thing just woke me up. Or I'm just have a restless night because of all that is happening, and more importantly what will happen. Fuck you Tyler!

Infection+12:05

It's definitely the cup that woke me. Just as I was waking up I could feel some sort of vibration down there. What other crazy shit have they packed into the device. My bedroom smells like a locker room. Thanks Tyler!

Infection+13:55

Fuck it, I'm getting up. I'll pee in the shower.

Infection+14:20

So that didn't work as well as I hoped. I could pee fine, but when I turned on the shower it was like pouring water in a gym shoe. If it smelled bad before, it absolutely reeks now. I think I'm gonna steal one of mum’s pads and tape it to the front, since it is still leaking God knows what and then wrap it in plastic and hope that contains the worst of it.

Infection+17:30

I didn't think of mobility enough. Jeans are clearly out of the question, so I went to school in chinos. It's bad enough that the cup is rigid, over sized and fully attached. Add to that some extra padding and cram it in chinos that aren't exactly lose to begin with, and you have something that looks funny stationary and awkward/hilarious when moving.

If I walk slowly I think I might come up with a gait that might be described as exaggerated jock sway, which would be step up from whatever ludicrous I'm doing now. Damn, I should have practiced yesterday.

I need to find some better pants, because these are too tight and restrictive.

Infection+21:30

My efforts to contain the smell isn’t fooling anyone, but I hope it just smells like I have a bad hygiene day. My crotch is a sauna though. The plastic wrap needs to go. Tyler kept his distance. I wonder if he is ashamed, or if he doesn't give a shit. Perhaps they have some sort of protocol he adheres to.

Day 2, 4:40 pm

Let's stop fucking around with the childish infection timer. This is serious. I found something sobering when doing some online patent search.

I was just blindly trying to find patents for any of the different things this cup does, and managed to find a description on "bio-polymer adhesion complex and application for individualized restriction control". I don't understand more than a fraction of what is written, but in the schematics there is a drawing of EXACTLY the cup I'm wearing. The list of example uses in the description includes prison inmates and persons under house arrest. This is a retrofitted fucking ankle bracelet.

It's originally designed to never come the fuck off through tampering. Fuck.

Day 2, 6:30 pm

Mum gave me some Vichy Laboratories excessive odor control deo roll on she bought at the pharmacy. Roll on to what, exactly? Well, she can only solve problems she knows about I guess. Should I tell her? Would she mind having a sports jock son? She would probably tell me to do whatever makes me happy. Would I be happy? Tyler certainly looks pretty fucking pleased.

Day 2, 8:20 pm

I've not spent that much time on wanking before. Like once or twice a month. But now that I can't my mind kind of wanders to it all the time. I've done some, let's call it research, that you can orgasm pretty well by putting something in your ass. Not doing that.

Day 2, 9:46 pm

Got some weird hot flashes in the cup while taking a shower. Smells as bad post shower as the last time. I don't know if it is the smell or I'm tired, but I went to bed early. I'm too hot and sweaty to fall asleep though.

Day 3, 2:12 am

Can I go to the police? This is clearly some sort of assault. Tyler would be the first one under the bus. Perhaps the coach. Probably not further than that. This is backed by serious money after all, so they will just protect themselves and their IP. Does it really matter though? By the time they've forced any action I've had this thing on me for a month, I've grown a donkey dick and gone completely mad. Much good some cash compensation will do then. And do I want to punish Tyler? Fuck yeah I want, but not like that. He's a victim too.

Go directly to a hospital then? If I can't figure out what this thing is or does, how would hospital staff be any better. They'll probably start cutting around it, and there is no telling how it will respond. It was designed to never come off, at least not without a fight. Probably horribly so, to set an example.

Day 3, 2:28 am

I'll try to sleep in the garden. It's cooler outside and doesn't stink.

Day 3, 4:51 am

Dozed off a bit I think.

I've been thinking about the construction of the cup. There are a some design details that has been nagging me. For something that small it appears to be almost magical in abilities and power storage. But then it hit me, it's not crammed packed with batteries, electronics, vials of chemicals and all other stuff you might need to build something like this.

It's biological. Perhaps not in the "alive" sense of an organism, but "alive" in the sense a virus is alive. It's a biochemical robot following instructions encoded in DNA, or something like it. If you consider it a manufactured parasite it all makes sense. It has access to the resources of a full human body and can leech heat energy and pee chemicals off the body indefinitely. The "bio-polymer" attach to the skin, and perhaps even have direct access to nerve impulses. There is really thin membranes in the dick, so it can probably send stuff directly into the blood stream as well.

Fuck.

Day 3, 9:36 am

I just realized I can't remember a thing that has been said so far in school today. I need to cum!

Day 3, 11:23 am

Becky spent her presentation on "Manspreading". She probably started working on the talk already last week, knowing her, but she clearly directed a lot of the points directly at me. Looked directly my way for most of the talk. No, Becky, I'm not subconsciously asserting dominance.

I CAN'T PHYSICALLY CLOSE MY LEGS, BECKY!

I found a different pair of chinos that works better, Becky. No matter what I do, there will be a pretty sizable bulge down there though, Becky.

Day 3, 14:02

God Dammit! The inside of the cup just went super cold 10 minutes into math class. I couldn't finish a single thing. Just not jumping and screaming was hard enough. It's mostly back to normal now, I think.

Day 3, 15:14

This is what I think happened. They started to test the cups on inmates. By mistake it started to leak chemicals or active DNA from the device into the inmates. They had tested the cup technology artificially before, on pigs perhaps, and hadn't seen these effects. But they didn't put it on the pig’s dick, did they.

So suddenly their inmate control device has turned into the worlds best slow release injector for men. Perhaps even the original formula made dicks grow. They just made the minimal needed changes and paid coach to start human trials on teenagers.

Then why the fuck do I need to keep this log? They must have so much more data on what is done to us to have a useful trial. I guess this might come in handy in the inevitable court case.

Day 3, 16:40

I'M SO HORNY ALL DAY.

I went to have a cold shower. If anything things just went even worse. How is this happening! FUCKING FUCK TYLER FUCK

Day 3, 20:18

Why do I have to do this? I know what the end point is going to be. A fucking dumb, arrogant jock dick. Assuming it is inevitable, and I don't see any way out, why not have it over and done with tomorrow. Just walk to the gallows and submit. Whatever that thing is doing, physically and mentally, is minimized the sooner it's off me. Back when Becky would speak with me she told me a rumor that the nerds gone jocks all had monster cocks. She didn't say anything about the regular jocks, so it probably is specific to this procedure.

And if they, the old jocks, are not joining up hand over fist to get such dicks, the procedure itself, or the side effects, must be pretty discouraging. Otherwise they would just cram the cup down their own pants.

Let's get rid of this thing first thing in the morning.

Day 3, 11:49 pm

Fuck, it vibrates.

I've been sweating balls, trying to sleep naked without any sheets. I was just sort of tugging at it, to see if I could feel anything in the dick, when it started to vibrate. It's been going for like 15 minutes now.

Day 4, 2:11 am

I smell.

The cup stinks, but I smell. While trying to ignore the humming dick I noticed that my armpits smell like moist gym bag.

I showered like 10 hours ago. That's never been a problem before, so it's definitively changing me somehow.

I fucking need this thing off me ASAP!

Day 4, 2:20 am

fucking god dammit it went ice cold again

Day 4, 7:38 am

So I went to the locker room. Once inside I realized I didn't really have a plan. What if they were not all in on it? I would appear like a lunatic, ranting about sci-fi balls cups. Turns out I didn't need to worry. First guy who saw me, Derek or Devin or something. Big guy, short buzz, looks intimidating. Anyway, he saw me and started shouting "You are not supposed to be here." I was like "I need to get something removed".

He walked up right into my face. "You are not on the list. Tyler fucked up so someone has to be punished. Fuck off!"

I hesitated to leave. He took one step forward, physically pushing me backwards and almost had me trip over. "GET OUT!" he shouted right in my face.

Day 4, 9:16

I've been locked inside the disabled toilet and crying since leaving the locker room. How long can I go with this thing on? You physically die after about a week without sleep, but it is letting me sleep in short bursts, so perhaps it could keep up indefinitely. I can't. I won't. Why shouldn't I just tell everything to mum, have her call the school, the coach, the press. Whatever is needed for someone to get this thing off me.

I should think this over carefully. But how is that possible if you are sleep deprived, horny AF and your dick is on vibrate mode? I can't stay here though. I'll walk home and tell mum first thing she gets home.

When I open the door, the first thing I see is Tyler, leaning against the opposite wall and smiling a smirk.

- Sup bro? - FUCK YOU! You ruined my life! - It was a shit one anyway. You should get another one. - That's not happening either, is it?

Suddenly I was bawling my eyes out. Exhaustion, sleep deprivation, rejection, horniness, anger. It was all coming together.

- Heyyy bro, come here.

I fucking hated him, but somehow I didn’t just bolt. I walked right into his arms and let him hug me. I realized that his change in appearance and personality had obscured his bodily changes. Just feeling his arms around me, I could tell he had gotten a lot stronger.

- You know Steve O'Conner in the chess club, right?

It was such an odd non-sequitur. I had to struggle a bit, but yeah, I'd helped him with a science project last year.

- A little bit, why? - I talked things over. Give him this and you are back on the list, second place.

He handed me another cup, packaged in a sealed, tearable plastic bag. I know I should feel sorry for Steve, but the only thing I could think of was my vibrating dick.

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bobasheebaby · 5 years ago

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Penny Prompts

1 “If I take it off, NAME wins.” “Sweetie, every night you don't kill him/her in his/her sleep, he/she wins.”

2 “Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.” “Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.”

3 “NAME, what did we say about being a nicer friend?” “Thank you.” “NAME, what did we say about being a gullible weeny?”

4 “I'm not signing a prenup.” “All right, NAME, listen up! You sign anything he/she puts in front of you, because you are the luckiest man/woman alive. If you let him/her go, there is no way you can find anyone else. Speaking on behalf of all men/women, it is not going to happen, we had a meeting.”

5 “What am I supposed to do?” “Err, keep your mouth off other men/women.”

6 “So you have a song stuck in your head. It happens to everybody.” “Well, I'm not everybody. I have an eidetic memory. I should be able to remember what song this is, but I can't. Something's wrong with me.” “I told you if we were patient, he'd/she’d figure it out for himself/herself.”

7 [Person a knocks on NAME’s door three times] “Who do we love?” “NAME.” [Knocks 3 times] “Who do we love?” “NAME.” [Knocks 3 times] “Who do we love?” “NAME.”

8 “NAME 's mad at me, and I'm not clear why.” “Okay, were you talking before he:she got upset?” “Yes.” “That's probably it.”

9 “Ignore them, NAME. They're just jealous because they'll never have a relationship as good as ours.” “Isn't this when he/she says "bazooka" or something?”

10 [looking at caller ID] “Ooh, looks like I'm gonna have sex tonight.” [answering phone] “Hey, baby...” “His/her right hand is calling him/her?”

11 “Doesn't he/she know you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?” “He/She doesn't have a boyfriend/girlfriend he/she has a NAME.”

12 “What kind of teenager did you think I was?” “Slutty.” “Easy.” “The word is 'popular'.”

13 “Once you open the box it loses its value.” “Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. I gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.”

14 “Is that all you have? Shop-worn tidbits like ‘talk to him/her’ and ‘let it go’? Gee, NAME, life's given me lemons, what should I do?” “Well, you could shove them somewhere.”

15 “More Halloween candy. Didn't you just buy a bunch of it yesterday?” “Oh, yeah. That's gone. It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.”

16 “I don't believe it. What's gotten into him/her?” “Oh, maybe a couple of virgin Cuba Libres that turned out to be kinda slutty.” “You didn't.” “Hey, you do your experiments, I do mine.”

17 “Come on, we are not old, boring people. We can do better than this.” “That's true. How late did we stay up last night?” “Almost 1 am.” “Damn straight almost 1 am. And we weren't even watching TV, we were watching Netflix like the kids do.” “Yeah. Is it a comedy, is it a drama? Nobody knows!”

18 “You gotta help me get my arm into my sleeve.” [Eyes closed] “Okay!” “Is that my arm?” “It doesn't feel like an arm.” “Then maybe you should let it go.”

19 “Who do I speak to about permanently reserving this table?” “I don't know, a psychiatrist?”

20 “Why would you buy peppermint schnapps?” “Because I like peppermint, and it's fun to say schnapps!”

21 “You wanna turn yourself into some sort of robot?” “Essentially, yes.” “Okay, here's my question: Didn't you already do that?”

22 “I would ask you to find some way to suppress your libido.” “I could think about you.” “Whatever works.”

23 “We cover ourselves in body paint and then we get on this big canvas and do our thing.” “Woah, that's kind of a big step for a guy/girl who only recently agreed to take his/her socks off.”

24 “He’s/She's only been here a day and a half, and I'm seriously considering alcoholism as a new career path.” “Hey, I talked to him/her for five minutes yesterday, and I've been half bombed ever since.”

25 [To NAME’s dog] “Bark once if you need me to call PETA.”

26 “NAME, that's not what boyfriends/girlfriends are for. Although you don't use them for what they're for, so what do I know?”

27 “Don't you dare knock!”

28 “Don't you think if a man/woman was living with me I'd be the first one to know about it?” “Oh, sweetie, you'd be the last one to know about it.”

29 “Good morning, slut!” “What?” “Oh, please! I recognise the walk of shame when I see it. All you're missing is a little smeared mascara and a purse with panties wadded up in it!”

30 “They're gonna get beaten up at that club.” “They're gonna get beaten up at Walgreens.”

31 “Holy crap on a cracker!”

32 “And then you put it back, compromising the rest of the onion rings.” “Aw honey, the buses don't go where you live do they?”

33 “What's up, buttercup?”

34 “And what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses?”

35 “Really still can't talk to me?”

36 “This is banana bread.” “This is a door knob.”

37 “Oh, I don't know. I don't want to manipulate him/her with sex.” “Oh, sweetie, that's what sex is for.”

38 “I'm a little low on cash.” “How much you got?” “Nothing.” “How can you walk around with no money?” “I'm cute, I get by.”

39 “And this is also not the right time. Do not propose.” “What?!” “I know that face. That's your proposed face.”

40 “Don't come to the hospital. We're headed home.” “Oh, that was fast. Did she sneeze the baby out?”

41 “NAME, will you marry me?” “Oh my god, yes!”

42 “Is this the stuff you want me to try on?” “No this is the stuff I want you to throw out. Seriously, don't even give it to charity. You won't be helping anyone.”

43 “If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?” “Well, not to steal from the bible, but turning water into wine sounds pretty good.”

44 “Oh, my God, you’re about to jibber jabber about jibber jabber.”

45 “I love him, but if he's broken, let's not get a new one.”

46 “We can't keep explaining everything. Read that book we gave you.”

47 “You know deep down inside, NAME’s a nice guy.” “The problem isn't what's on the inside. It's the creepy candy coating.”

48 “Um, you know it's kinda early. Do you wanna maybe come in for some coffee or something?” “Oh gee, its a little late for coffee isn't it?” “Aw, you think coffee means coffee. That is so sweet.”

49 “The thing about tomatoes, I think you will really enjoy this, is that they are shelved with the vegetables but they are technically a fruit.” “Interesting.” “Isn't it!” “No, I mean what you find enjoyable.”

50 “Do or do not do there is no try.” “Did you just quote Star Wars?” “I believe I quoted The Empire Strikes Back.”

51 “You can't let him/her get into your head.” “It's too late for me, my head is his/her summer house.”

52 “Well, while they're acting like teenagers we could do something grown up.” “Ooh, you mean like a museum?” “Yes, like a museum but anything else!”

53 “NAME’s being reasonable.” “Yeah, it's freaking me out. I'm gonna go.”

54 “Oh, my God, he/she won't stop.” “How does he/she keep coming up with new ways to be annoying?” “Nobody knows. That's why he’s/she's number one.”

55 “I love you.” “Who cares?”

56 “You're okay with an experiment where you have to answer awkward questions about your innermost feelings?” “Yes.” “Please can I do it with him/her, please.”

57 “Don't be like that. You two need to talk this out.” “Yeah, because you sound really funny.”

58 “I really thought he/she was going to say ‘let it go’.”

59 “Honey, you don't have to thank me every time we have sex, sweetie.”

60 “I finally realize I don't need to be famous or have some big career to be happy.” “Well what do you need?” “You, you stupid Poptart.”

61 “What are you saying? That I'm using my body to get dinner? That I'm some sort of Chinese food prostitute?”

62 “I was unstoppable. I was on fire. It was like my mind and my body were totally connected, like athletes must feel when they're in the zone.” “Again, it was miniature golf.” “Admit it, you're a little turned on.” “You can't be this proud.” “Why not?” “Because I beat you.”

63 “How do you not know how to use glue? Did you ditch pre-school?” “Yeah, but only because I was dating a second-grader.”

64 “Come on. How can you be sad when you're going home with all five foot six of this?” “You think you're five foot six? That's funny.”

65 “Look, I'm telling you I've done it. I clearly remember the cow standing up and then a cow on its side.” “Were you drunk?” “I was sixteen and in Nebraska, what do you think?” “I think you're the one who fell over.” “Well that would explain why the sky was also on its side.”

66 “I need to go back to dating dumb guys/girls from the gym.”

67 “We'll take you to the mall to get it done.” “Why? I can do it right here.” “Really? You have a piercing gun?” “No. All you need is a needle and an ice cube. I've done it, like, a dozen times.” “Oh, I don't know.” “Oh, come on. I'll be gentle. Let me take your ear virginity.” “This party's weird.”

68 “So is that it? Are we engaged?” “Yeah, I think so.” “All right.” “What's wrong?” “I'm not sure. It just feels a little anti-climactic.” “Yeah, it kinda does, doesn't it?”

69 “I promise next time I get married, it won't be a joke. It will be for love ... or money.”

70 “I don't understand, exactly how did he/she get any friends in the first place?” “We liked NAME.”

71 “Here, have some pizza, sweetie.” “You know I'm lactose intolerant.” “I know; I just need you to stop talking.”

72 “So, what do you think?” “I thought it would be a little more ... just more.” “I'm not even sure why we were out of breath.”

73 “I mean I was on fire. I was in the zone like an athlete.” “Sweetie, I beat you at this, too.”

74 “Well, I can't eat like a ten-year-old all the time.” “You're dating somebody! Who is it?” “What? What are you talking about?” “You only watch what you eat when you're afraid you might have to take your shirt off.”

75 “So I'm like a bran muffin?” “What? No, that's not what I'm saying.” “No, that's exactly what you're saying. I'm the boring thing you're choosing because I'm good for you.” “What does it matter? I'm choosing you.” “It matters a lot. I don't want to be a bran muffin. I want to be a cinnabon, a strawberry pop tart. Something you're excited about, even if it could give you diabetes.” “Sweetie, you can be any pastry you want.”

#big bang theory quotes #big bang theory prompts #penny #dialogue prompts #writing prompts #i live in covid 19 hell #quaratine sucks and making these keeps my mind busy

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thewayiremember · 5 years ago

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youtube

EPISODE 2

July 6, 09:47 AM

The official police statement is that I was found brutally beaten in a narrow alley near the movie theater I was supposed to be at around that time.

THE THINGS I KNOW:

The movie was to start at 7 PM

Complete blackout

I was found at 11:40 by a woman, who when calling 911 reported she had found a dead body because according to her I wasn’t breathing and my body parts were not really where they should be, but thank God the paramedics who rushed to the place didn’t entirely believe her judgments. It turned out that she didn’t even get close to me because she was too scared, and from a distance, I looked much worse than I did in reality.

The police later found out by looking into the security cameras that I wasn’t present at the movie theater that night

The police are annoyed because they don't believe in my memory loss and think I just don’t want to tell them where I went that evening.

My parents don’t believe me either. They asked me about a thousand times now why did I lie to them about going to the movies. Well, we don’t know if I lied to you, do we? To confirm that, I would have to KNOW that, and I DON’T KNOW that. Thanks for being supportive and not making me feel guilty.

It’s ridiculous to talk about. It’s ridiculous to even write about. But it is true, I did travel back in time. I keep having flashbacks of a teenage girl yelling at me that if I don’t do anything it will be my fault and that I need to go back to the day that it happened. But WHAT happened? I think her name was Nora? It all feels like a memory long forgotten.

I’ve been avoiding thinking about it because every time I do my stomach drops. I don’t want to get involved, I don’t care. Why should I? It’s not my fault I don’t remember. I want to be a dentist, not a detective. And I’m not a kid anymore who’s excited to run around the city solving mysteries. I don’t care about what happened to me. I'm fine! Stuff happens, let me move on.

11:30 AM

I asked a nurse if she could give me some more painkillers today because I couldn’t bare staying in bed for another day. She said “No problem”, but I’m pretty sure she gave me some sugar-filled pills since I don’t feel any better. Nice try, lady!

Apparently,I'm the only one who didn’t know this place had a cafeteria downstairs because when I went there people were having a legit breakfast party. It was too loud,so I ordered a coffee to go and took off immediately. Where do all those people get their energy from so early in the morning? Oh, coffee, probably. Nevermind. I went to the mini-park instead. Nice benches, nice grass, nice… fence? Yeah, I don’t have anything to say about this park. It’s nice cause it’s at the back of the hospital, so you can’t really hear any cars driving by. Yeah, that’s what I call a smart design, that’s it, right there.

I haven’t heard from Bobbie and Nicole for seven days now. They went camping on some kind of meditation program that Bobbie was really excited to go to and he tried everything to make us go with him. I don’t know how he managed to bribe Nicole into this, but there just wasn’t a chance that I’d spent a whole week without my phone or Internet whatsoever. So maybe that’s just karma that got me beaten for turning my back on a friend. Nah, I’d probably ruin the experience for Bobbie with my moodiness anyway. I like to think that I’m letting them gather their energy back that they lose by putting up with me. It’s a good thing. I’m a good friend.

They should be back by 7 PM. Today. They don’t know what’s happened. I mean, me neither, but I need to give them some kind of explanation. Do I prepare them first, somehow? Do I text them what happened, or do I wait till I’m back home tomorrow and we see each other in person? Do they want me to wait, or are they going to be angry that I didn’t want them to visit me here? Because I think I don’t. It’s depressing in here. People get triggered by hospitals. They get all miserable, it gets awkward, they don’t know what to say because they feel the need to feel sorry for everybody. And I don’t want to be felt sorry for. I’m fine.

Telling them thatI had a car crash crosses my mind for a second. That way I would skip the uncomfortable part of losing my memory and they could tell me all about their boring trip, that I’m actually weirdly keen on hearing. I kind of miss interacting with people. I know I always say that I love being alone, and I still stand by it. I recharge by being alone. But let me tell you, this place has recharged me pretty quickly. Or has it completely drained me and it’s not the lack of interaction itself that I miss, but just the lack of interaction with healthy people? Yeah, I can’t tell.

3:10 PM

Nathaniel, buddy, my hospital bestie, did they treat you good today? Are you comfy, do you need me to adjust your pillow? Here, let me… Better? Yeah, it is. Sorry I haven’t been around that much this morning, but do you remember when I told you that I wanted to explore this hospital some more before I leave? Yeah, and I’m leaving tomorrow morning, so, today had to be the day. Did you know there’s a mini-park at the back? And somewhere above us, there’s also have a mini-church. And when I say church I mean a room with a hanging crucifix on the wall. I’ haven't found any mini-synagogues or mini-mosques, though. Are you religious? Probably not. But how do you feel about Christmas?

Oh yeah, I talk to him like that. I just googled how likely is it for an unconscious person to hear me, and it said there’s a 25% chance. I’m doomed. I must look like Kathy Bates in “Misery” to him now that I think about it. When you wake up and you want to fill a lawsuit against me… I’ll be waiting.

I was out of bed for 4,5 hours and I’m completely exhausted. Is that how elderly people feel all the time? I hope not. I was planning on being an active senior. That’s how I see myself in 50 years. Hiking, biking, maybe even running. I’d be the coolest grandpa.

8:30 PM

I just took a 3 hour nap. Great, good luck falling asleep tonight. I’m looking around the room to see if I have to start packing today, but I guess I don’t have that many things here with me anyway, so, I’ll leave it for tomorrow. My mom is picking me up at 11 AM so I’ll have plenty of time to do it. If my last morning blood test results are all good that is, but I’m sure they will be.

I just got a text from Bobbie. Here’s the screenshot:

BOBBIE: Guess who’s back! Come over and don’t forget to bring your PJs. I promise I won’t be boring you with any meditation stories. Nicole said she won’t be attending my Sleepover Night because apparently, she’s tired of sleeping with me.

ME (wanting to sound neutral): Sounds great, but I can’t. See you tomorrow?

BOBBIE: What’s wrong?

God, he’s annoying. Of course he knows there’s something wrong.

ME (trying to keep it real but not reveal where I am so that he doesn’t get a wrong impression and think that I’m dying): Nothing serious, stop worrying. I’m free after 12, you down?

BOBBIE (thinking I need a lecture from him): Every time you have a problem you stop talking to me? Have you noticed? You avoid me until you solve it alone and you’re able to just tell me all about it afterward. Include me in the story sometimes.

But yes, I’m down, after 12 it is.

Yes, I have noticed. And I wouldn’t include him this time either, but since the story of why I woke up in the hospital isn’t over yet, I kind of have to include him, don’t I? I don’t want them to make a big deal out of it and I know they will. It’s not THAT serious. I’m fine!

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