#IRK honey go fix your fucking back /j

[some-loozzr]

Chat..

Ok I just realized that a LOT people draw IRK with a decent posture

While I give them the worst back problems imagineable

Ok these are kind of an exception

@numbuhinfinitys @artsygirl0315 @numbuh-72 @kandykatz GIVE BACK THEIR BACK PROBLEMS /j

[tuff-and-fluff-archives]

Party Preparations (Yuletide F/O Event)

Word Count: 1750

Content Warnings: Alcohol Mention

Summary: Not even getting ready for a party is an easy task with Junkrat around. Will Ruby be able to get her boyfriend to comply in time, or will these ADHD- riddled fools get too distracted by each other’s cute outfits? Well, the answer’s obvious, but at least Roadhog is there to help them out.

AAAAH I’M A SLOWPOKE BUT HERE IT’S DONE! I’m so glad I got this done in time for @nougatships​ ‘s event! I’m really looking forward to this event so I’m happy that I was able to finish this hhhhh. It’s far from perfect but I’m just happy it’s done! Also, here’s what Jamie and I will be wearing! (I didn’t include anything for Mako cuz I like that being left up to the imagination.)

“Jamie! Will you just unlock the door already?”

“No! I'm not goin', darl, not if I have ta wear that shit!”

Ruby let out an annoyed huff as she leaned back against the bedroom door, clutching a green flannel shirt in one hand. She, along with Junkrat and Roadhog, had been preparing to leave for a holiday party, but as the night went on, Junkrat had only grown more and more irked that he would need to wear somewhat formal attire for the event, which had culminated in him stubbornly locking himself in his and Ruby’s shared bedroom.

“Jamison,” Ruby called out again, “are you only complaining because you have put on a shirt with long sleeves?”

“... Maybe!”

“C'mon, honey, you know you can’t go shirtless. Even Mako was alright with putting on his sweater!”

“Well he always gets way too into this whole holiday thing anyway!”

Ruby looked back down the hall at Roadhog, who was in the kitchen adding a few finishing touches to the sugar cookies that he had baked earlier that day. The giant of a man was wearing a headband with antlers on it over the top of his mask, along with a flashy sweater with a cartoon pig wearing a Santa hat and the phrase “MERRY PIGMAS” below it.

“... Okay, maybe so,” Ruby answered, turning back to the locked door. “But you picked this shirt out yourself, Jamie! I thought we were gonna do a matching colors kind of thing.”

Junkrat let out a frustrated whine, a clear signal to Ruby that he was giving in. Time to go for the kill.

“You haven't even seen how I look in my outfit yet, honey. I think this dress is really cute, I was looking forward to finding out what you thought…”

There was silence. Then, Ruby noticed the door begin to creep open, and Junkrat's wide amber eyes peered through the cracked door to get a peek at the outfit in question. Ruby took the opportunity to shove the door open, taking Junkrat by surprise and making him stumble backward, and she quickly rushed into the room and tackled him, sending him to the ground.

“Aah!! You tricked me Roobs, no fair!” Junkrat squealed, although he couldn’t help but grin up at his girlfriend as she pinned him to the floor and gave him an up-close view of her new dress.

Ruby leaned in close and teasingly kissed his nose. “All is fair in love and war, my dear. Now put your shirt on!" She shoved the button-up into his face, and he let out a giggle before yanking it out of her grip. 

“Alright, alright, love, stop talkin’ nonsense, I'm puttin' the damn shirt on!”

Ruby scooted down a bit and moved her legs to the side so that she could sit in Junkrat’s lap as he sat up straight. “I was gonna do it all the while anyway,” he chirped with a smug grin as he briskly tore the button-up shirt open. “I just wanted ta make ya work.” He stuck his tongue out, and she playfully smacked his shoulder.

As he slipped the shirt up his arms and over his broad shoulders, Ruby helped him roll the right sleeve up out of the way of his prosthetic arm before she started to fasten the buttons, starting at the lowest one first. As she focused on the task at hand, Junkrat sat back and admired how his girl looked in that low-cut red dress that was short enough to show off her chubby thighs, and he couldn’t stop himself from reaching up and sliding her cardigan off her shoulder to reveal even more of her soft skin.

Ruby kept her eyes on his shirt, but she immediately took notice of his intentions. “Jamie, remember we’re going to leave in five minutes,” she affirmed as she made it to the last few buttons and attempted to fight back a blush. “We’re supposed to be getting dressed.”

Junkrat giggled at the red hue coming over her cheeks as he trailed his hand down to her hip to pull her even closer, and he squeezed her thigh while he leaned in to purr in her ear, “Ya know, babe, you really do look like a right spunk in that pretty little outfit a’ yers.”

As she finished buttoning his shirt, leaving the top one open to provide a glimpse at his chest, she felt a smile spread across her face and a rush of heat go through her body. She moved her hands up to fix his collar and at last made eye contact with him as he grinned down at her, and the blush on her face only strengthened as she felt Junkrat’s hand slide up to cup her bottom.

“J-Jamison, come on. We’re already gonna be late.”

“They can consider it fashionably late,” Junkrat chuckled mischievously as he raked his eyes over her outfit before he looked down at his own and noticed that she had left the top button of his shirt undone. “Oi, Roobs, I think ya missed one.”

“I know,” Ruby whispered as she slowly pulled his face close by his collar. “I like when you leave some cleavage exposed,” she joked.

A deep laugh rumbled in Junkrat’s chest, and he felt his lips brush against Ruby’s as he mumbled, “Well then, that makes two of us.” And with that, they let their mouths crash together, and Ruby moved a hand up to grip Junkrat’s blonde hair as his arms wrapped around her small body to push her tight to his chest. The two were so caught up in their makeout session that they hardly noticed Roadhog stomping down the hall and finding them on the floor of their bedroom.

Roadhog slammed his fist on the door to get the lovers’ attention. “We’re going to be late,” he grumbled, making his annoyance more than clear.

Junkrat looked over to his friend and flashed a wide smile, lipstick smeared around his mouth and not an ounce of shame in his body as he excitedly gestured to his girlfriend. “Look, Hoggie! Doesn’t my Ruby look fuckin’ great in her little outfit?!”

Roadhog merely let out a tired huff before turning around and walking back down the hall.

“Eh, what does he know about fashion,” Junkrat scoffed as he turned back to Ruby. She decided not to burst his bubble and kept it to herself that Roadhog had probably seen plenty of her outfit for the twenty minutes that she had been standing in front of the locked bedroom door. He held Ruby close and stood up so that he was carrying her bridal style and placed a short and sweet kiss to her cheek. “Ya look better than all the gold in the world, darling.”

As Junkrat carried his girlfriend out to the living room, the two saw that Roadhog was already headed out the door, a platter of his homemade sugar cookies in one hand and the car keys in the other hand.

“We better hurry and join him before he leaves us,” Ruby said as she looked up at Junkrat.

“Alright, then let’s- oh shit, wait a tick!” he blurted as he hastily set Ruby down, nearly dropping her before he dashed into the kitchen.

Ruby rolled her eyes, but it was a good opportunity to grab a scarf for her boyfriend so that he kept warm, so she moved to the closet and grabbed his favorite flame-patterned scarf as she heard him rummaging through the fridge before he ran back to her with a boxed pack of beer tucked under his arm. She raised an eyebrow as she turned to wrap the scarf around his neck. “Jamie, are you serious?”

“Aw c’mon Roobs, it ain’t a proper party without heaps of grog!” He flashed a wide smile in the hopes that she would let him bring the alcohol along.

As much as she wanted to say no, Ruby didn’t feel like wasting even more time and testing Roadhog’s patience even further, so she rolled her eyes before tiredly saying, “Alright, fine, but if you get shitfaced you’re going home in the trunk.”

“Deal!” Junkrat beamed and bent down to give Ruby another kiss as she wrapped his scarf around his neck, and he confidently stood up straight and turned towards the door. "Alrighty, let's move out!!"

As Junkrat ran for the open door, he let out a gag as Ruby firmly held onto his scarf to stop him in his tracks. 

"Ey,” he sputtered, “the hell was that for?! I almost dropped me grog!"

"C'mon Jamie, you know the drill. I can't have you banned from another one of my friend's houses," Ruby chided as she moved so that she was standing right in front of him.

"Hmph, s'not my fault they didn't know how ta have a party."

"Well not everyone has the same definition of fun as you, honey. Also, you blew a hole in their roof. Now come on, arms up before I lock you in the bedroom."

Junkrat didn't hesitate to comply, setting down the box and lifting his arms to allow Ruby to give him a pat-down and ensure that he didn't sneak any of his explosives out with him.

"You promise you're gonna behave tonight?" Ruby asked as she checked all his pockets.

"Yes, sweetie."

"No trying to challenge people to any types of fights or 'challenges'?"

"Wouldn't dream of it."

She was almost finished as she stooped down to run her hands down the legs of his pants. "And you'll be watching your mouth, right?"

"Of fucking course I will, babe!"

She looked up at him with pursed lips and one eyebrow raised. He let out a little giggle before kneeling down on one knee and cupping her face to kiss her forehead.

"I'll be on me best behavior, my Ruby," he promised.

She briefly turned her head to kiss the palm of his hand and muttered out a “thank you, sunshine” before refocusing herself. “Well, you’re clean, so you’re free to go. Now let’s get in the car before Mako drives off without us.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Junkrat grinned as he grabbed the twelve-pack and stood back up. He extended his hand to help Ruby up as well before gripping her hand tight and running out the door with her, giving her barely enough time to shut the door behind her as they dashed to the car, ready for a night of socializing- and hopefully, not too much mayhem.