#IM SO SORRY IM GONNA LIKE. DO A POST THATS ONLY 205 TO MAKE UP IM SO ASHAMED GOD DAMMIT

[ariyadaivaris]

this is a poor imitation of @tozawas ‘s magnum opus, wwe + shitpost generator (pt 1 and pt 2), but this is all i can do to express my appreciation of this concept

[ariyadaivaris]

hey ive been trying to figure out how to do this for awhile and since some anons have asked im gonna try 2 articulate my feelings about f*nn and this is not going to be very polite and im sorry, its nothing personal and if you have a perspective on him that i dont its fine and i absolutely get you and im glad you can enjoy that! i just wanted to try and work through how the fuck i feel about him and this is ultimately a pretty personal post and not a Manifesto on How F*nn Is Bad (i dont think he is, particularly, ftr), so like, if youre not interested which I CANNOT FAULT YOU FOR AT ALL, just know that its cool to go on! this isn’t trying to start shit or anything, i genuinely dont want to, im just writing this for Me, basically. its alright. 

thanks thats the intro done okay take care i love u

what...does f*nn have even. he’s good in the ring but he’s surrounded by people who are better. he doesn’t have a character. what motivates him? what the fuck is he even fighting for? what is his personality, even? he absorbs the storylines of everyone around him in any feud he does too often for him to be as underdeveloped as he is and yet we are here and WHY???

i mean. apollo. let’s look at apollo! apollo is similarly kinda underdeveloped character-wise and most of who he is comes from who he is irl, and people don’t really play characters up irl! but like. it’s not glaring in the same way f*nn is, because

1) apollo got called up SUPER SUPER EARLY in nxt where f*nn had YEARS to develop a character and still holds a spot as longest reigning nxt champion, and

2) apollo plays a support role! he’s not a main event player (which is fucking criminal in and of itself but thats another issue) and him being underdeveloped+not as fleshed out lends itself pretty well to him supporting people however they need support at the moment. it’s not Ideal but it works well for who he is in the context of story stuff, which is not the case for f*nn

(also 3 secretly but apollo’s moveset is actually really varied and interesting which f*nn’s is...not but that’s a subjective thing obviously lol)

like. f*nn is just. such a nothing of a wrestler. i’m sorry but genuinely i don’t know or understand what there is there. he doesn’t have a character besides...vagueing people on twitter until he gets what he wants and yes okay i know that’s not an entirely true unbiased thing to say and im sorry but also i dont think im exactly Wrong

(also about vaguing people on twitter i know that has something to do with how bad his 2017 booking was, i WON’T deny that, and multiple people are booked badly in dubya at once and they all deserve more than that, but also f*nn’s the only person who really got any rage on his behalf as far as i’ve seen and it’s definitely affected my feelings about that)

the only thing he’s got going for him is a storied history in new japan, which itself feels lacking in the ring, and which honestly...gets...a lot more credit than deserved (and mostly SOLO credit at that)? he DID create the bullet club but his bullet club was essentially an entire stable of Foreigner Heels. cheap heat. any story he told (and i only know that there was apollo 55, im unaware of any other feuds, so bear that in mind) feels so...like...secondary to that of anyone he worked with. he could be a support role and get away with being the white bread he is but GOD FORBID that should happen, and so he just engulfs the story of anyone around him and does nothing and it’s just

it’s disappointing and its boring and exhausting to see him get shot after shot after shot doing the same thing over and over again because He Can. i have nothing much against him, i think he’s petty and petulant and very...self-absorbed, like, not in an entirely bad way but in the sense that he buys a lot of his own hype? and its...off-putting. i don’t know him personally though obviously, that’s just how i feel about him based on what ive seen, but like, as a person, its whatever. i just can’t stand him as a wrestler or a character. he’s generic and unmotivated and so. NOTHING and it’s exhausting to watch and try to make something meaningful and enjoyable out of. especially juxtaposed with the miz rn, and even with s*th, who i hate but who at least HAS a personality even if it’s a genuinely awful one

not even going into the fan reception of f*nn vs anyone else who’s more deserving and interesting than he is, lmao, i’m bitter as anything about how f*nn is treated compared to the cruiserweights because NATURALLY and OBVIOUSLY i’m biased, you all know this, i don’t deny it, i cant say this comparison is all the way fair when im so so so FUCKING cwuisewweights, but like, the reaction to f*nn getting Beachballed vs any of the 205 dudes getting Beachballed was so heartbreaking in how much More he gets just for the name he’s got

i don’t know. i don’t know. i just think he’s such a nothing of a character, surrounded by people (taguchi, joe, kevin, hideo, FUCK IT, even s*th or like, fucking, KENNY, or the young bucks, or ANYONE) who really care about the character and story they have against him, and instead of being relegated to a supporting role where he’d be like, Worth anything, he’s thrust into whatever title picture or main event there is because He’s F*nn B*lor and it’s so...so much less talked about or acknowledged and for the life of me i don’t understand why. i don’t know what it is im missing

again, i don’t have much against him as a person, i personally don’t like how he acts but he doesn’t seem Proublematique in any way beyond...the foreigner heel stuff which is inherently built in anti-japan sentiment EVEN THOUGH that is strictly kayfabe afaik (though he does fucken. support the special olympics and did some Cool Trendy Straitjacket Entrances as prince nevitt and that is a very VERY personal thing i have against him) i guess that’s what matters. i just. ugh. im over it

i appreciate him being vocally supportive of queer fans but i don’t owe him for that and i still think it sucks that he, a (as far as i know) straight white dude, is getting the platform to do that instead of people who are actually queer and out in the same company. sonya isn’t getting this chance, and more blatantly, darren never got that chance. despite having the block the hate movement, and despite the fact that his coming out is what got him a face turn while it was ENTIRELY and COMPLETELY unacknowledged in the canon universe of wwe proper. like, i guess that’s not f*nn’s fault but there’s a common trend of men of color being pushed down to boost him up and it’s not the best. i don’t think that’s all his fault but i don’t like it

again this isn’t like, denouncing Liking F*nn, its fine! this isnt decrying everything about him, i don’t wanna fight about this, and if you like finn, sincerely i’m glad you can find something there to like and i hope you’re having a good time with him! and to boot i really DON’T know much about anything he did before dubya, and so i could very well be wrong about everything. like, calling the gullet blub just a Cheap Heat Stable? that interpretation could be and probably is wrong. i know that, and i know that’s probably gonna affect how i feel abt him, but also god i do not care even a bit enough to learn and i would rather die than look at pr*nce nevitt/gullet blub anything

i dont know. i hope this didnt come off as.......TOO shitty, i know this is a stupid and mostly impenetrable post, its alright, this is just me trying to work through this for myself and i promise its not like...a huge thing. thats all! thats all. im sorry if i worded this weird at all and i know my perspective isnt the best or most informed on this, but also i am very very tired of f*nn and i don’t think that’s an unfair thing to say

[ariyadaivaris]

artemidi replied to your post “boy oh boy i sure hope nobody asks about the embarrassing sappy au i...”

I need......more info on this.....blease

i’ve GOT more info on this don’t you even worry your sweet fred head about it !!

nxt’s tag team division is, to say the least, KIND OF...UH...BORDERLINE NONEXISTENT AS OF LATE and so when the time comes to set up the dusty rhodes tag team classic they really end up needing to Scrumble something together! the original plan was that tyler (bate) (to name specific tylers) and jack would team up however long they needed to for the tournament, but oh NO tyler’s been gravely injured, probably by pete because he’s a motherfucker

jack is stuck without a partner and the tournament is stuck without the final team! regal puts out a desperate call for help and ariya decides to strike a deal because why would he team with jack motherfucking gallagher without something to gain from it

the deal is this: ariya teams with jack, withstands whatever mockery comes his way this time, carries the team through the tournament and when he wins, he gets a shot at the cruiserweight title. ariya is a difficult person to work with but desperate times calls for desperate measures, and so ariya and jack end up being the newest addition to the tag team classic! Oh What Drama ! 

things are TENSE, TO SAY THE LEAST

they have to take a bit of a hiatus from 205 so they can travel with nxt, some of the tournament matches take place at house shows and live events and they do still need to work together as a team outside of the tournament if only because they’d be completely fucked otherwise! jack still can’t drive so ariya (dear sweet ariya who can’t drive for shit) is the official pilot in their travels, and jack is...an...interesting co-pilot

the first few weeks are mostly ariya giving jack Ze Silent Treatment while jack refuses to shut up ever and it’s kind of an awkward uneasy dynamic, even after they win their first tournament match through SOME MIRACLE

ariya finally talks to jack during a drive because jack stumbles onto the topic of musicals and says some things and ariya gets very heated very easily and it MIGHT turn into a cutting discussion about the accessibility of theatre and of bootlegs, and about who and what gets visibility in mainstream media and who and what gets nominated for tonys, etc, but its the most fun ariya’s had in awhile and they both kinda learn smth from it and from then on ariya’s more willing to like. at least talk to jack. and it’s...disappointingly...very nice

i feel like during a house show ariya gets trapped in the corner and almost gets dropkicked but jack manages to get to his corner and use his umbrella as kind of a makeshift shield to throw off their opponent and give ariya time to collect his wits and it’s maybe a silly thing to think about but its cute imo! my city now! 

after their second round match, which they almost accidentally win (against reDRagon, no less, bc let’s be real while we’re being self indulgent here i DO care more abt this storyline than about those two probably very talented but uninteresting slices of white bread), jack compliments ariya’s performance in the match and ariya doesn’t take it well because like. to this point he’s only thought jack’s just been humiliating and mocking him for no fucken reason since they met, and why wouldn’t he turn up this opportunity to backhandedly insult ariya now. and jack doesn’t KNOW that, and so ariya starts giving him a cold shoulder again for no reason as far as jack knows. OOH this drama. OOH this suspense

after they make it to the semi-finals (which no one was expecting, and certainly not them, honestly), they’ve gotta go to a press event with the other semi-finalists and it’s maybe not the most plot relevant thing but ariya does clean up really nicely and jack is maybe a little distracted the entire time because holy shit

and maybe then jack kinda realizes he hasn’t been engaging in a rivalry with ariya so much as maybe he’s had a dumb awful crush on him this entire time and not known how to realize that or express it and spends the night trying to keep his composure (because who is jack gallagher if not composed) while internally just writhing in embarrassment and agony and going “oh nnnnNNNOOOOOOO oh my goddd what did i DOOOO why did i DO that oh noooooOOOOOooOOooOoo” and its a rough night! 

and ariya sees jack being less than 100% during all this and sees it as Oh He Doesn’t Care, Of Course, Why Would He, and he’s pissed because he really thought they were getting somewhere as a team, and alas here they are and jack isn’t even paying attention to what’s happening, what a rude asshole as fucking always, and ariya MAYBE--just maybe--maybe just fuckin clocks jack in the face after jack tries to tell him he handled that really well

and jack sincerely admires that ariya remained pretty composed and serious and focused even when jack was busy trying not to wither into embarrassed gay dust but ariya only hears that as jack intentionally leaving ariya to his own devices and mocking how shitty a job he did

(not that ariya would ever say he thinks he did a shitty job, but in his heart he DOES want to do well and be a worthy contender, and opponent, and partner, and he knows he gets lucky a lot and so when he DOESN’T and when he’s painfully in control of the things that happen to him everything feels amplified and clumsy and Wrong and jack’s not helping lmao. i love drama)

obviously this isn’t received well and jack and ariya get into a brawl and they have to get broken up by their coworkers in attendance and ariya’s just yelling WHAT DID I EVEN DO TO YOU ASSHOLE, WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM

jack stays with mustafa and lince for the night because ariya straight up threw his bags outside the door of their room and locked him out and jack plays the words back and he’s like Wait...Maybe I’m Misunderstanding The Situation Here

and the next morning he goes to talk to ariya 

(who answers the door looking just fine and who hasn’t been alternating between uneasy sleep and furious tears all night, ariya’s fine) 

and he doesn’t like...get the nerve to go “hey i think i might be in love with you a bit” but he does manage to tell ariya he hasn’t been mocking him, and he’s been sincere this whole time, and he’s genuinely sorry he’s been a dick to ariya since they started on 205, but ariya, to be fair, has also been a dick, maybe more in terms of beating people up but jack’s sorry about what’s been happening, and ariya doesn’t have to accept that apology, and if ariya wants to forfeit their semi-finals match, he understands entirely

and ariya’s just like “yo what the fuck are you kidding i’ve still got a title shot on the line and we’re gonna win this, get in the car, it’s cool or whatever cmon lets GO” and he’s a bit flippant about it but for some reason he wants to...start grinning like an idiot and never stop again? for some reason? weird

things aren’t just all Cool suddenly after that because when i say i love slow burn shit i MEAN like, years, they’re still only barely allies but something’s There and that’s endgame, don’t play with me, we’ve gotta get face!ariya calling for a parlay with heel!jack in between here and The Datening for me to feel truly alive but thats just my humble imho

also they lose in the finals but ariya puts on enough of a performance to merit a title shot anyway and after the loss they might not work as a team anymore and they’re back to their own stories on 205 but before they get back to the hotel and get cleaned up and wash off the grime of bitter bitter defeat ariya finds jack sitting with his chin on his knees in the stairwell and sits silently with him and they maybe hold h*nds for like the BRIEFEST of minutes and never talk about it again but like. we’ve gone this far with this shitty badly written self-indulgent embarrassing post right? try and stop me

just kidding im stopping myself now. i hate that i wrote all of this. im gonna kill myself thanks