#IM REALLY ILL!!!!!ABOUTTHIS!!!!

[astradyke]

phil lester who wears the we're all doomed hat like a wedding ring. phil lester who says dan's name like it's a pet name. phil lester who takes a thousand photos of dan and every single one is a mosaic of how phil sees him. phil lester who riles dan up just so dan acts like a bastard about it and phil can giggle at him. phil lester who didn't want dan to move out, who didn't want dan to leave their joint work behind. phil lester who heard dan say that he needed to explore his dark painful experiences alone in gay but not proud and replied, okay, i'll be in here, you do this alone but i'm not going anywhere. phil lester who only says dan in his videos, as if everyone knows who dan is, because how could they not? phil lester who writes dan into his videos even when he's not there. phil lester who has a soulmate, right, and he calls him dan, and he takes stupid photos of him, and he keeps his name in his throat during the hiatus, and it means everything.