#IM COOKING GUYS HANG ON

[aqqleshiqqing-archive]

HANG ON IM COOKING SOMETHING HANG ON. THAT SONG "LUCKY" RIGHT

"And so I'm sailing through the sea To an island where we'll meet You'll hear the music fill the air I'll put a flower in your hair"

YEAH SO LIKE WHAT IF HE TAKES HER TO THE SOUTHERN ISLAND BECAUSE IM OBSESSED WITH THAT ISLAND HUH HUH THEN WHAT (with the eon ticket !!!!!! the SHIP!!! SAILING THROUGH THE SEA)

STEVEN IN GAME TAKES THE PLAYER TO SOUTHERN ISLAND YEAH SO LIKE WHAT IF HE TOOK HER THERE HUH HUH

and then this shit that my friend brought up thats in the southern island and is INCREDIBLY SIMILAR TO THE MEMORYSHIPPING THEME

[thatofabeavers]

the trans dick grayson brainrot is REAL and will NOT LEAVE MY MINDDDD

Like...my mans would not know he is trans. He would try so hard to girl correctly, my mans is not nearly self aware enough to crack that egg by himself. Gender is a performance and he is winning.

Until he puts on the batsuit and people think he's a man. Then he starts cracking.

[arlathen]

thinking about the inquisitor also moving into the lighthouse. thinking soooo hard.

[pyrotechnotomy]

i don't even think i miss this specific guy in particular i just feel so lonely. and there's also the factor of how often i am insanely uncomfortable and lacking in physical contact or affection. so to be comfortable with it and actually desire it is largely unknown and deeply upsetting to me. i want to cry with frustration at the fact that it has to be this guy instead of a better person. it makes me feel stupid and weak. and throughout all of it i curse my alien ness to this kind of things. it's like some brand new bullshit in my life which i don't need.

[heartscrypt]

Jamie, don't worry. Just like you, I've been thinking about JamiAzu and I, too, have not been able to create any content.

The best thing to do is to chew them in your head until something manifests on your canvas or paper. Alternatively, you can use this ask as an opportunity to talk about them. (I would love to hear your scenarios and headcanons because you understand them like I do.)

oh my god ok OKAY so. i had this fic idea rolling around in my head and the premise was basically like. the aftermath of twst events that didn't feature jamil or azul really heavily / only had small cameos but it was just jamil n azul reflecting (and maybe bonding) afterwards.

this whole thing was inspired by azul getting rejected by eliza in the phantom bride event LOL bc i thought jamil would get a kick out of it. i wanted to cover more events like wish upon a star (which i might talk about in a later post) or harveston or port fest but the phantom bride part i have like. Fully mapped out.

i only have this excerpt because. i lost motivation but if anyone wants to take this fic concept and do it justice they can :3 id just like to be tagged and credited

full outline is under the read more because God it is long. sorry. its also kind of incomprehensible because im incomprehensible about these two

but the ficlet for the first event, phantom bride, was going to take place a few hours after where the event canonically ends. jamil finds out azul got sooo rejected and laughs at him under his breath for a bit. says its because eliza could sense that he was fake as fuck all the time. azul gets frustrated and flustered bc the guy he wants so bad is currently mocking him for having NOOOO game. he's like "yeah well. you didn't participate b/c of kalim so you don't know what impossible standards she had"

jamils still used to deflecting when it comes to his competence so he'd dismissively say that of course he wouldn't have been a suitable candidate to woo the ghost even if kalim was guaranteed to not be involved. he's not that kind of guy. azul's Jamil Bullshit radar is ACTIVATED. he immediately insists that jamil absolutely Could've swayed eliza into wearing the ring and starts praising all of jamil's qualities with such a Genuine belief in jamil's abilities until jamil is the flustered one trying to beat azul's compliments off of him with a stick.

this part is really funny to me because in my head there's a scene before where jamil is telling azul that his approach failed because he always came off as disingenuous. and then here in this scene azul's so genuine that jamil's taken aback and in his head he's like "if he approached eliza the way he's approaching me NOW there's no way he would've failed." and then he promptly refuses to think about the implications of that thought for the rest of the fic. lol

anyways through the power of lovebombing and a few appeals to jamil's competitive side, azul goads jamil into demonstrating how he would've approached eliza to get the ghost sealing ring on her finger. jamil's pretending to be a suitor. one of jamil's rings (he's a jewelry guy no way he doesn't have a few rings) plays the role of the ghost sealing ring. and of course azul is the Substitute Eliza in their little pretend scenario so we get. these two indirectly flirting with each other in the weirdest fucking way possible. roleplay.

also there's a funny bit of azul mimicking something eliza actually did mid-scenario and jamil breaking out of character to be like "No Way ok Time out no way you aren't fucking with me right now" and azul responding like "no she really did say that" and jamil getting the most longsuffering expression on his face before slipping back into his princely character.

azul enjoys being the one "chased" by jamil for a change but he's always cognizant of the facade jamil's wearing while playing the role of eliza's prince. knows that that's just as much Not the true jamil as the "dutiful servant" jamil was, and is in return so totally lovestruck by how GOOD jamil is at being manipulative. not even swooned by the princely way jamils acting. he's falling head over heels for the fact that he KNOWS jamil is acting and in reality could not care less and yet is able to pull off such a convincing display. because azul's fucking crazy and his taste in men actually sucks so bad he sees all the red flags in jamil as fun little collectibles. he's mentally like "its so frustratingly attractive when he says something with that little smirk smile and we both know he's lying straight to my face but i cant call him out on it." GIRL. YOU ARE SO FAILCRINGE

on jamils end of things. yes he is pretending to be a "prince" for "eliza" but he's also hyperaware that this is azul pretending to be eliza for the sake of the scenario so. he gets a little sneaky. a little underhanded. starts doing and saying things that are targeted to catch Specifically azul off guard so azul gets flustered and breaks character for a split second. this is solely to fuck with azul and has Noooo other reason behind it (nevermind the fact that there is a giddy feeling jamil gets when he's able to crack the facade azul wears to see the real, vulnerable azul hiding underneath).

they go back and forth for a while, jamil pushing forward relentlessly while azul pulls away but always stays close (a complete reversal of their usual dynamic). but then jamil says something that's so completely him and definitely not part of the facade and azul forgets himself for a moment, forgets that they're playing pretend. lets his guard down completely. from jamils perspective, this startles him a little because he wasn't expecting it and he certainly wasn't expecting for azul to seem so convincingly enamored by him (it's because azul actually is but like jamil's kind of operating under the assumption that azul is incredibly fake all the time) and he REALLY doesn't know what to do with the realization that he likes the way azul is looking at him right now a lot more than he probably should like attention coming from someone he supposedly hates.

so he panics internally, shoves the ring onto azul's finger while azul is distracted, and tells him he can stop acting now because jamil proved his point that he Could've gotten the ring on eliza. azul snaps out of it and is like "ah. Yes. Acting. I'm so good at it Wouldn't you agree jamil" (hes pretending his inner monologue rn doesn't mainly consist of distressed dramatic bitch wailing and screaming. hes embarrassed abt being so vulnerable when they're both supposed to be acting he wants to crawl into an octopus pot and never come out). jamil's reply is smth like "yeah yeah whatever of course you're used to acting b/c you're a fraud" (his inner monologue also sounds like distressed screaming btw. less dramatic and more Full of dread and horror). moment of awkward silence where they just aren't looking at each other but azul's hand is still in jamil's (since jamil had to take his hand to put the ring on). worst handholding experience ever. 0/10

jamil breaks the silence. "i prefer it when you're not acting". on the surface its just a casual dig at azul's role at eliza but like THE WAY he says it. means something more. azul picks up on that, thinks back to all the times during the scene where jamil got him to break character for a second, the smug satisfaction on his face when azul sputtered or faltered. his first conclusion is "he wants me so bad" because he's delusional but then he reels it back a little and only says "i prefer your true self as well." jamil knows what THAT means well enough. he's starting to get suspicions that their dynamic isn't just "guy who is trying to exploit someone he sees as an opportunity x guy who fucking hates him because the other guy is a slimeball". he isn't sold on azul's intentions being all that pure though. he needs to bide his time, hang back and see whether this moment was a fluke.

they r still holding hands btw. neither of them has pulled away yet. jamil's the first to look down and Acknowledge it, silently swiping his thumb over the ring on azul's finger. drops the other's hand. says very nonchalantly that azul is going to keep the ring. azuls like "? haha i couldn't Possibly keep this. it's your ring". jamil smirks. says "keep it as a consolation prize. and a reminder of how badly you embarrassed yourself today". looks up through his eyelashes to watch for a reaction. azuls head nearly explodes. jamil knows in his gut that once azul recovers he's going to be Fucking Insufferable for the next few weeks flaunting that ring around everywhere and playing up the bond between himself and jamil but as he leaves, he can't find himself caring all that much about that as long as the other Does wear the ring.

[kaeyapilled]

a fact about me is im always thinking about kaveh and alhaitham in disgustingly cute domestic situations together

[velarisdusk]

i took a break from kinktober writing to crochet a sweater (my first wearable project, im very excited) and i'm listening to the throne of glass audiobook while i do it (IT'S REALLY GOOD IM ANNOYED I DIDNT START ON THE SERIES SOONER??????)

BUT all this to say, i got the idea to - if this sweater goes well - make a velaris sweater :') with ramiel on it :') it's already a thing i know but ive wanted one since the first time i saw one on tiktok but i dont wanna buy clothes on tiktok bc im worried about wearing anything THAT cheap bc i have sensitive skin, and theyre WAY expensive on etsy, so i will make my own :D

[coldflasher]

currently one week into a two-week stay with a terrible relative who needed help recovering from an operation and because i'm the only competent adult who was willing to do it (my dad literally lives with her but is both incompetent and unwilling) and i just. do not know how much more of this i can tolerate

she has the most TERRIBLE opinions and every morning when i sit down she'll just say something AWFUL and i have no choice but to respond because how on earth can you sit and listen to someone say something so repugnant and NOT say something. the one good thing i can say about her is that she isn't a tory but every other terrible evil little box you could tick, she probably fits it

i'm sure you're wondering, quite fairly, why i have even come here knowing this is the case. just to clarify, she has NEVER been this overtly awful before. like don't get me wrong, i knew she had some questionable opinions and i've butted heads with her about her views before but it's never been on this level. i think that now i'm an adult she feels free to go full mask off with everything and i'm like listen i'm usually in favour of unmasking but in this case can you put that shit back on, right the fuck now, preferably with superglue. and then apply said superglue to your mouth

the only reason i haven't just fucking walked out already is because my brother is coming down here on wednesday to see her for the first time since he started on testosterone, and i am genuinely concerned about how this woman will react because like. i'm sure saying she's also a transphobe will come as a shock to no one and for obvious reasons no one has told her... but when she actually sees him and hears him speak in person i feel like she's going to you know. catch on. fairly quickly. and i need to be here so i can back him up against the potential fallout and so i can get him out if things turn nasty. like it's not that i think she'd be able to DO anything, she's an old woman and she's just had surgery, but like. i'm obviously not gonna leave my brother to deal with that shit by himself

but yeah every minute i spend here is slowly crushing my soul to powder and making me feel unwell at the idea that there are real people who fucking think like this. and not only do they think it but they're willing to SAY IT and think it's a normal fucking thing to believe!!! and then when i go "what the fuck is wrong with you" and argue back she acts like there's something wrong with ME!!!! LIKE I'M THE BAD PERSON??? HUHHHHHHH???

[screamingay]

somehow these current roommates we have are the worst that ive known yet and last semester we literally had a girl who smoked cigs IN her bedroom. list of grievances below lol

[todayisafridaynight]

national bf day on twitter that means i get legal rights to finish my cringe masadai fic where daigo meets masato's dad(s)

[cc-cuttlefishculler]

idk why my brain chose this particular boarding school (probs bc im fixated on three hopes rn) but i wish we could all live at garreg mach together and go to classes together and hang out and stuff :[

[hedgerlogs]

zhao’s karaoke song is so funny. he is not taking his twitter suspension well

[crunchycrystals]

the bad kids as minecraft youtubers fic

[tkbrokkoli]

nnnnnnggghhhj 😵‍💫

[arolesbianism]

Brainstorming some more stuff for the story with the grape twins and I am very much enjoying reinventing every character in the universe. What if you were a teen parent and didn't realize until the kid you abandoned popped up out of nowhere hanging out with a bunch of supervillains and with a Huge amount of daddy issues. The pains of being an alien and not knowing until you're an adult

[slvttyplum]

being roomies with a guy wasn’t what you had in mind, but what could you do when he was the only one offering the deal you wanted?

a bright smile on his face as he folds his arms over his chest, leaning against the marble counter, his eyes trailing your body.

“of course i can do that for you; don’t worry about paying a deposit; i got you.”

and with that, you were eight months deep into rooming with suguru, only catching each other for a couple of minutes every other day.

“what’s up? you hungry?” his hair tied in a messy bun with his shirt off and his pajama pants hanging low.

ugh… put some clothes on.

offering you dinner every time you came into the kitchen, his eyes dropping to your ass when you passed through to get to the pantry.

he didn’t know why, but he just couldn’t stop looking at you every time he got the chance; you were his type to a T.

suguru thought that was all it was ever going to be, just looking at you and exchanging a few words before you left the apartment or went into your room.

until he heard something, something he was never meant to hear.

when you did your “activities,” you made sure to be respectful; sometimes it even felt weird to do it when someone else was in the house, but you had needs. keeping it quiet, not risking a peep slipping through.

this time you got a little bit too carried away, but you just couldn’t stop. one hand working in between your thighs, your fingers pumping in and out of you at a good steady rhythm, while the other rubbed over your body, and suguru was there to hear it all.

suguru slowly walked to your bedroom door, leaning against the wall by it with his arms folded, red smeared all over his face as his heart raced, the sound pounding in his ears.

the walls were thin, the only downside of this place, but suguru found himself smiling at the fact he could hear you.

trying to imagine what position you were in, if you were using your fingers or a toy, the lewd faces you were doing, if you were building a sweat at this point, questions flying through his head.

he felt like a creep listening in just a few feet away, which he totally was, but your voice was keeping him there.

suguru loves your voice; it sent tingles down his spine every time you would speak, even if it was just a single "no, thank you." when asking you if you wanted dinner.

it was so soothing, so soothing, in fact, that he would purposely prolong the small talk just to hear your voice bounce off the walls of the apartment, his mouth salivating while he listened to you.

keep going, please.

your moans weren’t loud, but they could be heard; they were very distinct, but he could still make out your sweet voice, and that turned him on more than it should have.

unfolding his arms and grabbing for your door handle, if he had to listen to your moans for another minute, he was going to combust; he was going to go fucking insane.

sliding his hand off the handle and putting a knuckle to the door, calling your name as he knocked lightly, loud enough for you to hear.

“… i cooked; did you want anything?”

his eyes slowly looking over to the kitchen that was lightly lit, closing his eyes trying to come up with another excuse, while you quickly scattered, licking your fingers and throwing on the shorts beside your bed.

fast walking to your door and opening it, a bright smile on your face, trying to act normal.

"im fine, suguru; i already ate." your eyes sliding from his beautiful face to his body, once again shirtless with pajama pants hanging low, showing his v-line, but something else caught your eye.

suguru mirrored you, sliding his eyes over your figure and your disheveled look, feeling his dick growing more, his cheeks flushing as he slowly puts his hand over his bulge, making eye contact with you.

a lump was caught in his throat, his chest rising and falling so fast like he just came back from a run.

he needed you, or he was going to go fucking insane.

"do you want to fuck?"