#IF I WERE A GAMBLING MAN AND I AM YOUD BE MY BEST BET
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every time i hear lucy’s new song i just start shaking and crying
#trying to be cool about it and failing MISERABLY#YOU ARE MY BEST GUESS AT THE FUTURE YOU ARE MY BEST GUESS#IF I WERE A GAMBLING MAN AND I AM YOUD BE MY BEST BET#lucy dacus#julien baker
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here is the church here is the steeple you were looking for saints but you only found people. aint that just the way it goes, i watched you fall from grace you were graceful...
#warm like holding hands and sharing a pair of mittens...#you were my best friend before.....#if i were a gambling man (i am) youd be my best bet...#ouaghhh#YOU WERE MY BEST FRIEND BEFORE!!!!#i am deceased#ANYWAYS#ch
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if i were a gambling man. AND I AM. youd be my BEST BET
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Day 1 - Reserve
Written for @the-hinata-project
Prompt: Reserve Course Student Hinata
Rating: G
Warnings: Lowkey manipulation and insecurity, but other than that, not much.
Notes: Alright, so I’m still in the middle of these, but like... Here’s the first one! They’re all going to be pretty short, around 2K but I’m gonna do my best to finish all of them so wish me luck...! And this first fic is gen. No ships. Next ones won’t be so gen. It’s also pre-HPA. Kind of.
***Alternate Ao3 Link***
Commission? Donate?
The last wish he made on New Year’s was a simple one.
I want to get into Hope’s Peak.
But of course that would never happen.
“Can’t you dream more realistically, Hajime? Do you have any idea how expensive Hope’s Peak actually is? We can’t afford that.”
“I... I know that, but...”
“If you know then why are you burdening us with this? Please. Just think about other people besides yourself for once.”
“...sorry.”
His mother sighs, but ruffles his hair in a show of affection.
“You current high school isn’t so bad, right? You can make good friends here, and it’s a fine school.”
“I guess it’s...decent,” he mumbles.
“Just don’t even worry about Hope’s Peak anymore,” she tells him. “It’s impossible, and it can’t be helped. Keep your chin up. Okay?”
“...fine...”
Because he knew, after all, that she had a point. They couldn’t afford it. And he wasn’t talented. It was a pipe dream to attend. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Still...
--
For his birthday, he was given a new laptop to replace the old. It was a fairly recent model. Pretty expensive. Likely compensation. He can’t say he didn’t like it.
He wasn’t ungrateful. He doesn’t think so.
It’s just that I admire Hope’s Peak more than anything.
So much so that he finds himself on the forums first thing.
>Does anyone have any idea who’s going to be in the upcoming batch?
>They haven’t finished scouting, right? Oh, but I just saw on the news that an actual princess was accepted! Hope’s Peak really can get in anyone!
>Wow, actual royalty?!
>There’s this photographer I follow. She’s getting in, too, I’m pretty sure.
>I just saw Saionji Hiyoko-san’s performance last week. I’m positive she’s getting in.
>I’m more interested in the princess. Can you imagine how lucky it would be to meet an actual princess?
>>They’ll be running the lottery in a month or so. What I would give to have more of a chance...
>Wow, they’re doing that again?
>With how much getting into the reserve course costs, you probably have a better chance with the lottery...
>But if you win the lottery, you’re actually considered talented. Reserves are just...y’know, reserves.
>But you’ll get to meet the princess, potentially. I think the money’s worth it, even if all I can do is steal a glance!
>Still... Seems so lame that you can just pay your way in...
>But brand name recognition is pretty powerful...
>>I heard you can actually get into the main course from the reserve course if you do well enough.
>No way! That’s a pipe dream! Maybe if you paid like, twice as much!
>Must be nice to be rich, huh...
Hinata stares, wondering what to type, but also letting the thoughts swirl around in his head.
>>I would do anything to get into Hope’s Peak. But my family just can’t afford that.
>Yeah, mine neither. Who actually can?
>You’d be surprised... They’re getting a lot of enrollments.
>You can’t like...get a scholarship or anything? It’s not like you need to go to college after attending Hope’s Peak.
>Well the golden gates can’t open that wide, I suppose...
>It’s for the best. If just about anyone could get in, it wouldn’t be that special.
Hinata bites his lip, picking at the peeling skin with his teeth.
>>Still. I want to get in more than anything.
>If you aren’t talented, it can’t be helped.
>>I would give anything.
>Pffft. No kidding. I’d give an arm and a leg, probably.
>>I would give anything.
>A lot of people would.
>You’re like a super fan, huh. Well, I am, too, but still...
>>Getting into Hope’s Peak has always been my dream.
>Everyone wants to be special, man.
>But if everyone was special then no one would be special.
>It can’t be helped. You’re either born talented or you aren’t.
>Right?! I must have spent hours drawing but there was always that one person I could just never compare to. It’s hopeless!
>You shouldn’t say hopeless on the Hope’s Peak forums!
>Haha, sorry!
>>I’ve never been talented. There’s not one thing I’m particularly good at.
>Normie...
>>But I want to get into Hope’s Peak Academy... More than anything.
>Give it up. For your own good. Wishing for the impossible isn’t healthy.
>Hey, don’t tell him that! What if he ends up winning the lottery?
>Yeah, right!
>>I’m not particularly lucky, either.
>Luck’s not a talent anyway.
>Are you sure? I’ve known people who get ridiculously lucky while gambling...
>If they gamble too much, that luck’s bound to run out. And I bet they’re not that lucky, they just brag a lot.
>That might be true... Still it would be nice just to get into Hope’s Peak by chance...
>Whoever wins that lottery probably is ridiculously lucky considering how many people are participating. We’re talking like, every high school student in their first year in the country.
>Sucks to be other countries, huh.
>Maybe someday but for now, I like not having that much competition.
>Still a ridiculous amount competing...
>I bet it’ll be someone who can afford the reserve course if they haven’t already enrolled.
>No fair! That kind of thing should disqualify you immediately!
>>I just...want to get in...
>Yeah we all do. But it’s impossible.
>Impossible.
>Totally impossible.
>Pigs will fly first.
>I heard some Ultimates actually can make some crazy shit. We might see flying pigs pretty soon.
>That’s terrifying.
>>I just want to get in.
>You should get offline.
He should. He really, really should.
Is it really impossible?
“Of course it is,” he can practically hear them murmur. “Not only are you untalented, you can’t afford it! And you’re going to win the lottery, either!”
Hinata buries his face into his hands, shuddering.
I just... I just...
--
To his surprise, he later receives a DM. Shivering, he clicks it open.
>Would you really do anything for Hope’s Peak?
He doesn’t recognize the name of the sender but...it looks official.
>>Yes. Of course. Why?
>There actually is a program you can sign up for that will get you in without having to pay a coin.
Hinata blinked once. Twice.
It’s way too good to be true.
But he’s desperate. Beyond desperate.
>>What is this program? How can I sign up?
>Here’s the information.
--
What he’s about to do is how people get themselves abducted, he’s pretty sure. But right now, he’s desperate and... If it really was someone associated with Hope’s Peak, how bad can it be? What’s the worse than can happen?
I already have no chance getting in. I know that... But...
His heart was pounding as he took the train. He stared out the window, at HPA’s towering buildings in the distance, getting closer and closer, and he sucks in his breath.
It’s so shining that it hurts to look at.
Shining like a dream...
--
“Ah, Hinata-kun, you made it after all. So you have the necessary information?”
“Uh... Yes...” Truth be told, he didn’t understand most of it. There were a lot of words that were hard to read and pretty...advanced. “I just...well you said you couldn’t explain everything in just files, so...”
The other looked pretty professional. Sharply dressed and smiling in a way that at least seemed pretty welcoming. But...still pretty intimidating, considering the circumstances. Hinata ducked his head, feeling rather flustered.
“Yes, it’s meant to be kept very tightly under wraps, you see,” they laugh. “I need to assure confidentiality before explaining, Hinata-kun. Surely you understand.”
That’s...weird.
But it made his blood thrum with excitement to be a part of.
“I... Y-Yes, of course. Absolutely... Of course...”
“Sign this form, then, promising that.”
“O-Of course...!”
He scribbles down his signature without a second thought. The other smiled more, pleased. Hinata squirmed in his seat, and tried to keep his posture straight.
With that, the other sat across from him, polite and yet...expectant.
Ah... Hah...
“So you’re willing to do anything for this school,” they say, voice almost light but also dense with significance. “Might I ask why?”
“It’s...as I said on the forums,” Hinata mumbles, fiddling with his tie. Even dressed professionally for this would-be interview, he feels underdressed. “I’ve always admired this school. Always. It’s always been my dream to...to go there...”
The other nods, expression unchanged.
“And why do you wish so badly to go there, despite not having a talent that can be cultivated?”
Hinata flinched.
“T-That’s...! I...” He hesitates, but he soon finds the words just spilling out. “I just want to be someone I can be proud of. Someone who can stand tall. Be confident. Be significant. Isn’t that what I deserve?”
“Isn’t that what everyone deserves?”
Hinata’s nails dig into his palms.
“I admire Hope’s Peak...more than anyone. I will give whatever I can...and then more than that...if I have to.” His teeth grit. “Whatever it takes... W-Whatever it takes...!”
Even though I know it’s selfish and impossible, I just...!
He just wanted to be someone. Someone other than...this.
Unimportant. Unremarkable. A faceless, meaningless part of the mass. The idea of being consumed by mediocrity and insignificance for the rest of his life, never to matter, never to even be remembered, just to disappear, just like he never even existed—
“I’ll do...w-whatever...it takes...” He’s shaking, eyes wide and crazed. “Whatever it takes... Whatever I can...and then more than that...if I have to.”
“Ah. I see.” An easy smile. And yet, the atmosphere felt so heavy that it was near suffocating. “Very well then, Hinata-kun. That’s exactly the kind of attitude we’re looking for.”
Hinata lit up.
“R-Really?” He dares to let hope slip into his tone. “D-Do you really mean it?”
A nod.
“Hinata-kun... If you could be reborn from the faceless body of a miserable nobody into the world’s hope... Would you?”
“That...sounds too good to be true...” His heart really was racing, but he was flushed with excitement. “But... Y-Yeah... I... Of course...”
“Then, allow me to tell you about how that can be possible. If you agree, you’ll be accepted into the school, free of charge, no talent necessary. In fact, it’s even essential that you be talentless.”
I...don’t understand.
He doesn’t understand but it just sounds so incredible that he can’t help but be swayed.
“...tell me.”
“Very well.”
A folder of files is placed before him. They look too important to grasp. And the stamped out letters of CONFIDENTIAL stare back into his wide-eyed, shimmering gaze.
Fingers trembling, Hinata actually slices his finger open as he flips it open.
He doesn’t even feel the sting, as engrossed as he is in the text.
“I...”
The words swirl around in his head, over and over until he drowns in them.
“Do you need time to think about it?” the other asks him kindly. So kindly that Hinata is struck cold. “Tell you what... You can still get into the reserve course. You don’t have to say yes right away, and the deadline will be in a few months from now. You can attend classes here until then...and then make your decision on whether or not you’re willing to stay. Okay?”
“I... O-Okay.” Hinata swallows. “That’s... I’m okay with that.”
I said I’d do anything. And I do...want to do anything. But...
His hands are shaking while still gripping the files.
I can’t...let this chance slip by...even if it’s something like this. This is everything I ever wanted. Why am I even hesitating?
“It’s alright,” the other says reassuringly, taking the files away with ease. “Hinata-kun, I know you’ll make the best decision for yourself.”
For...myself. Myself...
“I...yes.”
“I’ll have them send in your acceptance letter and uniform.” His hand is shook, the grip warm and calloused. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Hinata-kun.”
“A-A pleasure... Yeah.”
Just like that, Hinata was stumbling out of Hope’s Peak, trembling and falling to pieces with every shaky step.
I have to do it, he can’t help but think. I have to do it, for...for myself...
This was going to be the year his life changed irreparably. He was sure of it.
#thehinataproject#hajime hinata#hinata hajime#Magi fics#the hinata project#although it's not going to show up#I might as well#I'll probably have to message someone anyway#The tragedy of being muted
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you are my best guess at the future. you are my best guess. if i were a gambling man - and i am - youd be my best bet
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you were my best friend before you were my best guess at the future.
YOU ARE MY BEST GUESS. IF I WAS A GAMBLING MAN AND I AM YOUD BE MY BEST BET
#i need to die. i need to die aggressively#ask#kalmia#kal tag#kalmia <333333333#kalmia <3333#KAL <33#KALLLLLLL#kalmiaaaa kal <333#my best guess at the future. you are my best guess
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