#I've never done anything like this before :3 excited and terrified!

[corpseofwires]

Hello! My name is Cassius [pronounced cash-us] and I am a 23 year old, black tarot reader attempting to move in with my fiancé!! We just need some finacial help to get there. I can do readings over video or audio call [or if you're uncomfortable with that I am able to do readings through text as well, it just may be harder to connect without seeing/hearing you]. PayPal is the only way for me to collect payment directly, but my fiancé has Cashapp and Venmo if that works better for some people. I have been doing readings for 10 years and it is currently my main job offline, so I am not making all that I need to be making. Even the 15 minute readings would help me and my fiancé immensely, DM me to get set up. Thank you!!

[qtboni]

Hi bunbuns !! So we reached 1K FOLLOWERS on this blog, and I can't express how grateful I am for the support from everyone. Honestly, I never imagined this blog would ever reach this milestone. A few years ago, I had a Haikyuu-centered blog dedicated to writing fanfics and omg. like. wow. so much has changed since then! I'm overwhelmed with emotions right now, and I just want to say thank you for sticking with my work and showing so much love and support. I know I've been absent from this blog for a while and I admit, I've been missing writing fanfics. After a few weeks of reading other people's fanfics (delulu), I gained so much motivation and found the passion to write again <3 I want to clarify on how to make a REQUEST based on this drabble collection: Please provide a brief outline of the story you want me to write (please keep in mind that each story will be a one-shot), the character/s you want to feature, and you can either choose one of the drabbles or let me choose one for you. As always, please have manners and say ��Thank you’ <3 Here are the drabbles, or like prompts if you may call it, I've written specifically for this celebration! I know I still have a long list of requests waiting in my inbox, and I want to apologize for not getting to them sooner. I really appreciate everyone's patience and support. Writing for you all has been such a rewarding experience, and I'm excited to continue sharing more stories with you all in the future. Much love 💕

── ◜✧◞  MASTERLIST ﹕ᶻz

STATUS || 2/24

• ULTIMATE SACRIFICE — "He would do anything to protect you, would even give his life in return to yours. He had already lost so much, he wasn't going to lose you too."

• HEART'S KNOCKS — "He hesitates to ring the doorbell, his hand trembling slightly. But he can't just leave without at least talking to you."

• SUCH TEASE — "He leans against the wall, a sly smirk etched across his face. His gaze then have gone travelling down your body before settling back on your eyes."

• HEALING TOUCH — "He wakes up to the sight of you by his side, your gentle fingers inspecting the dressings on his wounds."

• ANGEL BABY — "You were the only one he felt he could truly open up to. All the trauma, all the nightmares, you were the first one who truly understood him."

• CONSEQUENCES — "He couldn't bring himself to admit it, but the truth was he was terrified. He had fought in countless battles, but nothing had prepared him for this."

• TENDER CARE — "He grimaces from his injuries, but despite the pain, he gives you a small smile, thankful for your constant care and concern for his wellbeing."

• TIME'S TICKIN' — "He nervously looks around while waiting for the elevator, hoping he'll make it in time."

• LONELY NIGHT — "Rain pounds against the windowsill as he sits alone, lost in thoughts of you, wishing you were by his side."

• DELICATE FLOWER — "He gently wipes away a strand of hair from your face, his fingers trembling slightly as they brush over your skin."

• REMINISCING — "He felt a wave of tense as he entered the room. The scent of flowers and sunshine filled the air, reminding him of all the memories you shared together."

• HERE WITH ME — "He catches you off-guard with a kiss in reuniting after a long deployment."

── ◜‹3◞  COL.L KÖNIG :

• HEARTBEAT — "As you place your head down on his chest, you relished in the comfort of his uniform and the heat of his body."

• AFFECT ME — "He leans in closer to you, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine, as he whispers sweet nothings in your ear."

• RUINATION — "He couldn't shake the feeling that he had done something wrong, that he had ruined everything. He didn't know how to make it better."

── ◜‹3◞  SER.T HORANGI :

• SLEEPY LOVE — "He holds you in his arms, planting kisses on your forehead as he lays you in bed together."

• BELOVED'S TOUCH — "He lays on your lap, his soft hair brushing against your thighs as he looks adoringly up at you."

• SHY HEART — "He stares at you with a loving gaze across the corridor of the barracks. He should probably go before you find him out."

── ◜‹3◞  COL.L ALEJANDRO :

• AFFECTION — "He gently touches your cheek with his thumb, a small, sweet gesture of his affection."

• HIS PRESENCE — “His fingers pause, his gaze fixed firmly on the phone with a single message displayed on the screen: ‘I'm here.’"

• A CHOICE — "He couldn't believe he was really doing this. He was given the choice of betraying everything he stood for, just for you."

── ◜‹3◞  SER.T RODOLFO :

• FIRM HAND — "He tries to get out of bed despite his injuries, but you promptly pushed him back down, reminding him that he must rest to heal."

• SHINING SALUTE — "He stands to attention in his dress uniform, saluting proudly as he looks across the field at you, his sweet lover."

• GREAT CARE — "Your capable hands massaging his aching back, after a long day of training and fighting."

[whumpy-wyrms]

The Last Lab Rat #8: Nightmare

previous | masterlist | next

content: lab whump, captivity, nightmare (italicized), description of death and gore (nobody actually dies), comfort, needles and mind control mention, winged whumpee, test subject whumpee, intimate/creepy scientist carewhumper

short lil chapter before #9, which is 1 of 3 chapters specifically that I've been super super super excited about for over a year now :)

—

Dew was dying.

The scientist had finally done it. He fucked up. His experiment failed, and now his precious test subject was taking his last breaths, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

Visions of giant needles and bright fluorescent lights and white lab coats flooded Dew’s blurry, fading vision. It had just been like any normal day; Anton was conducting another fucked up unethical experiment on his lab rat, when something had gone wrong. Dew didn’t know what it was. Anton didn’t tell him anything besides this being just a fun surprise for him, and he’d find out later.

But Anton made a mistake this time. He made a terrible mistake that cost Dew his life. And now he was fading away and Anton looked worried and angry and scared and confused all at the same time, and Dew was wondering why it reminded him of a scared little kid who had only just learned what death was.

But that wasn’t the end, not yet. Somehow, things shifted and instead of looking panicked and terrified, Anton was standing over Dew with a knife in hand. There were twinkling stars on the ceiling now, that was a nice change. Dew chose to look up there instead of at the scientist who was in the middle of cutting his slowly dying heart out of his body.

And just like that, he was dead.

. . .

Anton was awoken to the motion sensor alarm sounds coming from his surveillance cameras. After his test subject’s second escape attempt a few days before, he turned on the motion sensors at night, in case Dew planned another escape after hours while Anton was sleeping. If there was too much movement, more than normal, then the sensors would go off and sound the alarm, alerting Anton that his test subject was awake and causing ruckus in his room.

And Dew was moving now, he was in bed, thrashing his arms, tossing and turning, but… He wasn’t awake. Oh. Was Anton’s little lab rat having a nightmare?

Dew had lived in Anton’s secret underground laboratory for approximately 55 days now, and this was the first time Anton had seen Dew having a nightmare. And a bad one, to the look of it. Anton guessed it made sense, after everything he put the little guy through, but what was he supposed to do about it?

Anton had never been used to being around… people, in general. He grew up with the scientist who raised him, and had almost no other human contact besides him and the other test subjects being held captive during that time. Pierce taught him all he knew, and none of it was how to comfort somebody. The loneliness that had been consuming Anton all his life— it had never felt like a problem. He didn’t need people. He had science… and animals.

But ever since he found Dew, he was starting to feel a little less lonely. It was nice, talking to someone and having company around that wasn’t an animal, monster, robot or some other experiment.

He hated leaving his test subject all alone, deep underground in his cold, dark lab whenever he was done for the night. While Anton was up here, in his cabin where he could look out the window and see the deer frolicking in the forest and the bright stars above.

And he had to admit, being around Dew was fun. It was fun experimenting on him, testing his limits and making scientific breakthroughs… But it was also fun just being able to talk to another human being about human things. It was fun having someone similar to him that he could relate to and exchange stories. Being with his lab rat was fun, even when he wasn’t experimenting on the poor thing.

And now Dew was having, what seemed to be, a terrible nightmare. And he had absolutely nobody to comfort him during it. Except Anton.

So, at around three in the morning, Anton begrudgingly made the decision to go down to his lab, but not for anything related to science.

Anton paused at the door, hand hovering just over the doorknob.

“Hey, Basil?” He asked, glancing over to his mouse friend’s enclosure. She always comforted Max during their nightmares, so maybe it’d be a good idea to finally introduce them…

“Basil?” Anton asked again. No response. She must be sleeping, so he decided not to wake her up for this. She always got grumpy whenever Anton interrupted her beauty sleep anyway.

Anton opened the door, and began down the long, winding stairs.

. . .

Death was strange to Dew. The last thing he saw was the scientist looming over him, making no attempt to save his life– his sad little pathetic life that had been taken too soon by the man who made the last months a living hell.

Death just felt sad, melancholy, bitter and sweet at the same time. Dew thought to himself, about everything in life he missed out on, and everything he wanted to do before it was taken away from him.

He saw his best friends… Hayden, Layla, and Sawyer… they were there. They were at home, crying and looking for him and he was dead but they didn’t know that, they would never know, because Anton would get rid of his entire existence before anyone even came anywhere close to his lab.

Dew thought about his little crush on his friends, and how he never got to tell them his feelings before he was kidnapped and taken away to the place he would die. His friends would never know how much he loved them. Dew’s entire being was filled with regret and sorrow and anger and sadness as he slowly faded away into nothingness.

Anton had taken everything from him.

“Dewey…” There was that fucking voice. Why was he here again? Dew was supposed to be dead, not him, he’s not supposed to be here too.

“Wake up.” The voice felt oddly far away from him too, miles away in a cloudy abyss. Dew felt underwater, he felt like he was falling, he felt like he was being stabbed by a million terrifying needles all at once. “Wake up,” the voice said again.

No! He was supposed to be dead! He was supposed to be free!

“Dewey? Dew? Wake up. Can you hear me?”

Dew gasped awake at the feeling of someone shaking his shoulders, and sat straight up, clutching his rapidly beating heart through his soft sweater— wait. He was alive. It was all just a bad dream. He was alive.

Dew sighed deeply, trying to calm himself down when he realized he was most definitely not alone.

His eyes snapped open and he stared straight ahead at Anton. It was hard to see, with the room being almost pitch black dark, but Dew knew that shadow standing at the end of his bed all too well by now. His dread from the nightmare came flooding back, and his breathing became rapid again, coming out in short gasps as tears burned in his eyes.

Dew stared up at Anton with wide, scared eyes, his whole body shaking with fear. His hair was a mess, more than usual as it stuck to his face with his stream of tears. His brown eyes were sunken, bags intently visible now that Anton was paying attention. How had he never noticed before? Dew was in pain sometimes, of course, that was sometimes necessary for the experiments. But that was just temporary, physical pain that could easily be healed with the right drugs. But this was different, Dew was scared and sad, and it was Anton’s responsibility to cheer him up.

“Hey,” Anton said softly, trying his hardest to sound comforting.

Dew flinched away hard, wincing as he knocked his head against the wall behind him. His wings curled around his body protectively, and he put his knees to his chest.

“Just breathe, calm down, okay?” Anton said. “It was just a dream. You’re okay now.”

Anton saw the terror deep in Dew’s eyes, a fear that never seemed to leave, but was most intense now. Anton realized the sad fact, his test subject had been dreaming about him.

Dew’s terrible nightmare was about him.

Duh. Fucking obviously, what else would it be about?

“I won’t hurt you, Dew,” Anton said. “Relax.” But Dew still stared at him like a deer caught in headlights, moments from death.

Anton thought for a moment. Maybe it was best to leave Dew alone for a bit then. It wouldn’t be right to stay near him and make him more afraid. He needed his space, and Anton respected that. He slowly turned around to make his way towards the door when he felt a light tug on his shirt.

Oh.

“Do… Do you want me to stay?” Anton asked in disbelief, voice quiet as if not to scare the timid animal away.

Dew looked away, not making eye contact. He knew how scared he looked, how vulnerable and defenseless he was, but… being alone would make it worse. He needed someone here, with him, to comfort him. He hated himself for this. Only a child would want to be comforted after a nightmare… But, he couldn’t help it. He hated feeling so alone all the time. Dew looked back at Anton, and timidly nodded his head.

“...Okay,” Anton said, slowly moving to sit on the edge of the bed. This was weird. He wasn’t used to this, he’d never needed to comfort another human like this since…

That didn’t matter. It’d been five years, Anton was a bit rusty, but he could figure it out.

“Do you want me to stay until you fall back asleep?” Anton asked.

Dew looked embarrassed as he nodded his head, looking to the ground. Okay, Anton thought. That was fine, Anton didn’t need to sleep tonight anyway.

“Alright, I will.” Anton said. “You don’t have to be scared, I won’t hurt you.” Not now anyway, tomorrow’s experiment might be a bit painful, though. He chose not to say that last part out loud.

Dew continued not to say anything as they sat in silence. He closed his eyes, trying to imagine himself somewhere peaceful and safe, just for a few more moments, while he tried to calm down.

Dew flinched when he felt Anton lightly touch his wing. “Sorry,” Anton said, bringing his hand back. He was still extremely fascinated by Dew’s wings, even after a month. But he was trying to be more respectful of Dew’s space.

Dew glared at him, and then quickly stopped himself. No, he couldn’t make Anton upset at him now, not after last time.

As if Anton could sense what Dew was thinking— which was a terrifying but impossible thought in and of itself— Anton sighed and said, “I won’t take control of your mind right now, don't be scared… and uh, you don’t have to talk right now if you don’t want to. It’s okay.”

Dew slowly nodded his head. It was at least a relief to know the scientist wouldn’t force him to talk when he really couldn't sometimes. The thought of finally being understood by someone– even if it was his captor– who was probably similar to Dew in more ways than just being trans, calmed him down a bit more.

I mean, yeah, Dew thought, Anton was probably autistic as well. It was obvious. And… It was a reassuring thought, that despite being kept here against his will, Dew wouldn’t have to worry about not being accommodated. Besides, it was another thing he now knew about Anton that could be useful in the future. Maybe asking him about science would stall future experiments— Dew sure could never stop talking whenever someone asked him about one of his special interests.

Dew decided to lay back down on his side, facing away from Anton, and pretend it was anyone else keeping him company. He was just so tired and at this point, he didn’t care that Anton had started petting his wings again as if he was merely a pet. If the scientist was trying to comfort him, Dew would let him. It was better than being hurt, at least.

Anton tried his best to preen Dew’s wings for him, and Dew sighed deeply, leaning into the nice touch. Any other time he would have recoiled at such contact, but he needed this now, he needed something to ground him back to reality. He needed comfort, even if it was from the person who kidnapped him, who kills him in his nightmares and makes every waking moment a living hell.

Because Anton was all Dew had. He was completely dependent on the man, for both food and water, and comfort. He couldn’t get that anywhere else here, and the thought of never being comforted again made Dew feel sick.

It’s okay, he thought, he’s just doing what he needs to do to survive. By seeking comfort from his fucking captor. Whatever, that was fine. Dew deserved comfort. He’d escape soon. Everything was going to be fine.

Dew just wished he had someone to actually tell him that.

Anton hummed in satisfaction when his test subject slowly started falling back to sleep as he pet his wings. Though, his contentment quickly faded and was replaced with an intense feeling of guilt after being reminded of what had happened a few days prior.

After Dew found out he could be mind-controlled by Anton at any time, he started acting very differently since. Anton noticed right away that his test subject was more afraid of him than he’d ever been, and he couldn’t help but feel terrible about that.

Because, fuck, he was supposed to be making Dew feel comfortable here, right? And now he had just lost every ounce of trust the little guy had in him, all because he wanted to test out a new invention. Sure, mind-control was a huge achievement for Anton, he deserved to be excited about it! …But he went about it the wrong way. He hurt Dew, worse than before.

Because, after that day, Dew was just sad and timid all the time, it was no fun being around him. Instead of the almost playful banter between them that happened during feeding or outside time, Dew was eerily silent and compliant. Because he was scared of losing control of his body again.

Anton, once again, let his love for science blind him into not treating Dew like a person. He had fucked up again, and now Dew would probably never trust him, for good reason.

Anton, of course, didn’t need Dew’s trust, or for him to feel safe and happy. He could give Dew the absolute bare minimum for human survival and he would still serve his purpose as a test subject. But… Anton wasn’t like that. He would never be like that.

It’d just make everything so much easier if Dew was a willing test subject, if they worked together. But now, that’d probably never happen.

Unless…

It’d been long enough. If Dew became friends with Basil, maybe he wouldn’t want to leave… That made sense, right? No, absolutely not, but it was worth a shot. What else could he do?

Tomorrow morning then, Anton decided, he’d introduce Dew to his little mouse friend.

Anton gently set Dew’s wings down and climbed off bed, tucking him under the covers. He left his room, locking it, and headed back upstairs with a smile on his face. A new beginning, a fresh start. He’d make things right. Basil always knew what to do.

—

not sure when the next chapter will be out since it’s a Big one and i need time to get it right, but i'm really really excited about it :D

taglist: @whumpinthepot @shywhumpauthor @whump-me-all-night-long @whump321 @fuckcapitalismasshole @sorry-i-spaced @theelvishcowgirl @catnykit @tettlod @delicateprincepaper @rejectedbytheempty

let me know if you want to be removed or added to the taglist!

[welcome-to-sparkys]

5 + 1 - SecurityWaiter trying to get it on

Requested by @lab-trash

A/N I've never done anything like this before but I'm excited!!! I really struggled with this one though lol made me think.

MINORS DNI

Tags: Mildly suggestive, voyeurism, car sex, blowjob, handjob mention, Mike x ness, securitywaiter, dreamtheory

1. On the couch after Abby went to bed

The two thought this would be the most logical option, Ness especially. They just didn't calculate how difficult it would be to stay quiet, especially with Abby's toys and crayons around the living room. Also, clean up. They didn't have lube on hand too, and while Ness knew a few DIY recipes, Mike just didn't want to risk it. Abby tip toed out of her bedroom, hearing their squabble. She thought the two were fighting. Ness soon had her back in bed. After all that trouble, they decided to snuggle together and snooze to the soft sound of the TV.

2. Mike's home Round 2

This time they waited for Abby to be on an overnight field trip. Mike cleaned up the house to the best of his ability and even bought a rose to pluck the petals and toss all over the bed (it wasn't nearly enough). Ness's heart melted at the gesture. He sat on the bed while Mike ran off to go shower. As Mike came back to the room, dewy from the shower and in nothing but a towel, he slipped and fell. Poor Mike broke his nose and they spent the rest of their date at the ER.

3. In the car

It was... Not a good idea. Elbows and knees bumping into eyes and faces. Uncomfortable as hell, and the weather didn't really permit these activities. Plus, Mike was terrified someone might see them (This was Ness's idea).

4. Public Bathroom

Another one of Ness's ideas!!! (The little freak). Mike was a flustered mess when Ness just dragged him into the disability stall and started tugging at his waist band. Ness's plan probably would have worked too, if someone in a wheelchair waiting for the stall didn't clear their throat and ask when the boys would be finished.

5. Road Head

Surprisingly, Mike's idea. Well, a handjob but Ness was a little too eager and went for the full on blowjob. Mike thought it would be fine because he was taking back roads to their date destination, that is until he saw the police lights. He muttered some "shit" s and "fuck" s as Ness struggled to fix Mike's pants. It was just Vanessa abusing her position of power to pull them over and say hi (and also get the tea on her OTP)

1. Sparky's After hours (this may become a full on fic)

Mike was so exhausted when Ness's shift was finally over, but he was surprised to find the diner completely empty, with the lights off and kitchen closed for the night. Ness had tipped out the staff to leave a little extra early and he did all the cleaning duties alone. He certainly found it worth it as he convinced Mike to toss him on a table and rail him into oblivion.

[seviinoxiel]

Kazui T2 VD Thoughts and Speculations pre-MV

I've come back to finally talk about Kazui, one of my favorite prisoners, and give some of my thoughts and speculations based on his T2 voice drama before the MV for Cat drops. This voice drama still keeps a lot of things vague but the one thing I was able to interpret from this is that the Kazui gay theory may actually turn out real.

Eng TL source (big thanks for this):

There's really no other way you could interpret these statements. If he's not specifically gay then he is at the very least LGBT or queer. I will provide some quotes and my thoughts on them below.

Quote 1:

Es raises adultery as a possible cause for his crime but Kazui refutes it not by just saying that he did not commit adultery or infidelity but by also saying that it did not even turn into a case of one, implying that there were feelings towards a third party involved but it was simply never acted upon. Now whether the third party is just one person or a whole gender he keeps it vague.

Quote 2:

His marriage was built upon false pretenses and whether or not he did feel something towards his wife, the foundation of their relationship comprised of lies. Kazui viewed his commitment to the marriage as a sort of self-imposed punishment for his inability to stop his lies. He lied his entire way up to this point and it is only right that he continues to play his part.

Once he got the innocent verdict from Trial 1, he felt a bit relieved that maybe he could open up just a little in hopes of Es and Milgram itself to truly understand him. He took off his ring in order to alleviate himself from his punishment as he was validated into thinking that perhaps his lies could be unraveled. He does, however still feel guilty towards what happened to his wife.

Quote 3:

And then this passage comes along and it really just sounds like an old closeted gay man jaded by facing bigotry his entire life whenever he tried to simply be himself. It is very intense queer coding and if this was not on purpose then I do not know if I can ever trust this series with anything anymore. The emphasis on him lying ever since he was born as a way of survival especially screams queer.

To many queer and LGBT people, coming out of the closet is one of the most terrifying and monumental things you could ever do or ever have done. It feels like laying yourself bare to people who you do not even know if they would accept you or ridicule you. And oftentimes, the way other people act afterwards can feel as if it was a direct product of the coming out and, whenever bad things happen, queer people blame themselves for having even thought that something good would come from being open in the first place. Even though it was not their fault, they blame themselves because that was how society has conditioned them. I speak from experience by the way.

Now, this is speculative territory but I do not think Kazui coming out to his wife ever really affected her mental state to such a degree that she would kill herself because of it. Milgram is quite unreliable with their criteria in picking prisoners (e.g. Yuno being imprisoned for abortion), so I would not put it past them that Kazui was simply convicted for his close relation to his wife, for being a possible cause rather than a direct cause, or for his prior lies which led to that point. I think that was why Es also brought up Kant and how you cannot blame someone for telling the truth no matter whatever situation that may arise from it.

Well, that is all I could say right now and I am excited to see the full MV in around 6 hours. I was very confident in the gay theory before but after this voice drama I am certain about it and I hope I am not the only one. Thank you for reading and once again thank you to @onigiriico for the translation!

[rainbowsandwhumperflies]

Re: analysing Ryan: he's the "love to hate" character in the best possible way (for me, at least). So far he comes across as the most competent in his family and it makes him such a great antagonist; like, his mother is fixated on superficial details(whether Onyx acts graceful or not) over matter(whether he completes tasks or not) and his brother is basically a rich kid bully: the moment he realises he's on equal footing with someone or that confrontation may not end in his favour, Cadran folds like a wet newspaper(at least that's the vibe I'm getting so far). So far, Ryan feels like someone who would be just as functional out of the lap of luxury as he is in one; he can work(or quickly learn to work) his way if not back into lap of luxury, then to being seen as(mostly) a reasonable authority figure position and resources that come with this - and this is what makes him terrifying in a very grounded way (unlike his brother or mother, who seem more set in their ways as rich assholes). Also, we already have indirect proof of Ryan's competence as a whumper - Onyx's behaviour. He's the guy who conditioned him to behave as the perfect servant and supressed Onyx's memories of whatever life he had before serving the royal family. Ryan is ruthless and competent, and this is a very scary combo when established through his actions (as opposed to establishing it through narration - "show, don't tell" at its best). He's not unlikable just because its a genre convention, you written him as a genuinely scary antagonist, and I love this so much i struggle to put it into words. I want to hit him with a chair but I also want to see what schemes he's up to😈😈 also, I love the "every time I write Ryan, he thinks its okay to monologue" tags - he is the antagonist who earned his right to monologue. He's very pragmatic in his vileness(at least so far; based on your tags, he has some major trouble coming his way), and I really like the way it plays out in the story so far.

Tl;dr: I love the way you edit and write those characters so freaking much :3 :3

OH MY GOD. HI. OKAY. THIS ASK HAS MADE MY WHOLE WEEK. I HAVE REREAD THIS ASK LIKE FOUR TIMES JUST GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET.

I feel like you know these characters even better than I do, which is maybe a sign that I've done well writing them but also kind of intimidating?? but yeah. let's talk about Ryan.

The first time I tried to write this story was about a year and a half ago. I stopped for a few different reasons, but I still wanted to rewrite it on my new blog. And when I was rereading my old work, one of the things I got frustrated with was that I was excited to write multiple whumpers, but all of the whumpers sort of blended together. They didn't have any personality, if that makes sense? They were just a bunch of people who wanted to torture a guy. Which is fine but I really wanted them to be more individual, so that's when I started assigning them actual motivations.

And yeah, you pretty much nailed their main motivations. Lucia (the queen—I don't think I've ever mentioned her name but it's Lucia) is very superficial because she is very driven by how she thinks other people see her (she thinks that holding onto the title of royalty is more about popularity than anything else) and it reflects in the way she sees other people, especially the ones who work for her. Cardan is driven by entertainment because he thinks he can get away with anything (hence the surprised folding like a wet newspaper anytime something doesn't go his way). Ryan, on the other hand, is driven by something like productivity? He also sees himself as the most competent person in the family.

I've honestly never considered how well Ryan would do in, like, a job that didn't already come with authority. But he is very... put together, in a way that intimidates everyone around him. He is the type of guy who people praise by saying "They can make the hard but necessary decisions" the way people say about historical figures. Ryan can be super ruthless whenever he thinks he needs to be, whereas if we see Cardan being cruel, it's out of boredom or curiosity.

(On a somewhat separate note, the twins are more or less supposed to be literary foils. Foils are two characters designed to contrast each other, usually to highlight good qualities in the protag of a story, and the twins are meant to highlight how horrible the other one is. cuz they're both horrible.)

Also, it means SO much to me that you included the part about show vs tell because Onyx is not a reliable narrator whatsoever when it comes to the morality of the royal family, due to this conditioning. And I've been kinda nervous about the way it's written because I was worried that the narrator saying "oh yeah this is normal :) they're the royal family they can do whatever they want" might make people think that it's not as bad as it is or something? Especially in spots like chapter three where Onyx is like "oh yeah Ryan hates his brother more than he hates me." But like. I'm glad we can all agree that Ryan is a dick anyway

[sarandipitywrites]

saran's year of writing (2023)

hey y'all! saw a couple posts like this floating around and thought i'd hop on the train, because this year has been WILD for my writing (in a really good way). let's start with the bullet points version and i'll put the details under the cut. here we go:

I JOINED WRITEBLR

shared snippets of my work with other, actual humans!

made friends?!

started (and finished!) draft 2 of Dead Roots, Dark Water

wrote 1 short story for every week in october (that's 5 stories in a month! that's great for me!)

first NaNoWriMo in 10 years (and i finished it!)

drafted and re-drafted The Art of Empty Space

started draft 3 of Dead Roots, Dark Water

details, links to projects, me getting maybe a tad too personal, and those all-important wordcounts under the cut:

I JOINED WRITEBLR

i just realized i only started participating at the beginning of october, but it feels like i've been hanging out with you all the whole year 😅 maybe that means i should cut back a bit? nah...

really though, this year was the year i started taking my writing more seriously (not in a 'gotta get published' kind of way, but in a 'writing makes me happier than anything else and that's enough reason to set aside time and energy for it without feeling hella guilty' kind of way) and seeing you all posting your work and being so positive and encouraging to each other was what helped me get up the nerve to join in. and i can say without a doubt that it's the best choice i've made all year. y'all are such a supportive community and i've never once felt like i was encroaching or didn't belong here (and for me, that's really saying something)

so i guess what i'm getting at is: THANK YOU! i've loved reading your snippets and projects this year, and i'm way more confident in my own than i've ever been 💜 y'all are good peeps

Dead Roots, Dark Water

word count (edited and written): 187,789

that's a lotta words! DRDW is both my longest work wordcount-wise, and the work i've dedicated the most time to... probably ever. and i'm SO happy with it, it's a little concerning (/positive)

DRDW is now on its THIRD draft, and (assuming i don't do a massive re-edit) should be ready to start posting in 2024! *excited screaming* i've never released anything i've written in its entirety (the snippets i've been posting are actually a lot more than i've ever shared before), so this is MASSIVE for me and i'm both excited and terrified! overall, though, it's a very, very good thing

Short Stories

this october, i decided to challenge myself to do several things i don't ever do: write short stories; write them on a timeline; and share them. and i did! i wrote one short story for each week in october, and posted them here. they're far from my best work, and due to the timeline, they never could have been my best, which oddly i think helped make it easier to post them? they were also the first pieces i shared here (or anywhere)! they're not awesome, but i'm proud of them and i'm proud of myself for sharing them

NaNoWriMo and The Art of Empty Space

i've done nano once before, ten years ago. i was in college and had a lot more time then (and a job where i could spend the entire day just writing - i didn't know how good i had it), and even so i remember struggling to reach my word goal. but by the power of writing everything in wingdings so i can't second-guess my word choices, i made it this year! and even though i decided to challenge myself by writing a romance-heavy project (something i've historically avoided because IT'S HARD FOR ME, DAMNIT), i love AES and its characters and that feels fucking awesome.

even though my brain decided to spring a surprise plot restructure on me and now i have to rewrite like half of it. it'll be better for it, though, so it's all good 🥲

What's Next?

my plan for early 2024 is, of course, going to be to work on draft 3 of DRDW with the hope of getting some chapters posted (they are LONG, so i'll probably post to tumblr in chunks and the full, unbroken chapters on Ao3 due to formatting). once that's ready, i'll be able to return my attention to AES and getting draft 1.5 all written up. i've mostly figured out where the plot's going there, so it'll just be writing it up to figure out the gaps. if i'm able to write something for november again next year (which i really hope i will; nano did some great things for AES), it'll probably be one of the other Jak & Daxter fics i have kicking around in my head, because i am Obsessed (and switching it up between working on fanfic and original fic seems to work well for my brain).

i've been not super active here for the last month or so because Real Life Work is kicking my ass, but hopefully that will calm down and i'll be able to do more of what i want: writing wild shit, reading your wild shit, and screaming about it together 💜

good vibes and best wishes to everybody in the new year 🥂

[hgejfmw-hgejhsf]

20 Questions Game for Fic Writers!

I feel like I've done this before, but like...definitely before a MASSIVE amount of my fics were released post-fest, so thanks to the amazing @ssmtskw tagging me, I'm gonna do it all over again!

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

52 total!

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

128,450 words!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, only RWRB. In the past, I've written some for Once Upon a Time.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Ghosts

Volume Control

Retaliation

Do we still have forever?

Modification to the map of you

5. Do you respond to comments?

Always! I live by comments, so I will always show my appreciation for every single one.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I suffer from this syndrome that only allows me to write happy endings, so the angstiest ending I've written still brings with it some hope. It's Darkest before the dawn.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I think one of my newer fics, No fear, no fences, nobody - no reins has a pretty lovely ending. Lots of hope for a pretty blissful future.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet. Still waiting on my first hate comment. I'd love for it to never come, but you know how fandom can be.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Before FirstPrince, I wrote a lot of fade to black. Now, I dive right into wherever the story and the characters lead. The fic listed in answer #7 is probably the smuttiest I've ventured so far.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve ever written?

I haven't yet but I'd be open to!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, not yet.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not so far, but a couple are in the works!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

FirstPrince.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I once had a super neat idea for a Captain Swan kid fic, but I don't see myself ever finishing that one.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Henry's POV apparently haha. I'm just gonna spend the rest of my existence writing everything from Henry's point of view, and I'll be fine.

But honestly, as much as I never realized it, I think the dialogue is one of my major strengths. It took a friend @oneofthewednesdays complimenting me on my dialogue as well as hearing a podfic of one of my works to convince me that the dialogue I write feels pretty genuine and authentic.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Writing anything except one shots lol. I'm working on something now that might become my first real multichapter fic that isn't cowritten, and I'm really excited, but also terrified that I won't finish it.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done this! And I've received a ton of positive feedback from native speakers that I did it justice, which made me feel so good.

19. First fandom you ever wrote for?

Pirates of the Caribbean.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

Oh gosh. It's like asking me to choose my favorite child. But as many fics as I've written in the months since joining the RWRB fandom and as immensely proud of them as I am, my heart keeps coming back to quite possibly the best line I've ever written.

“Fuck,” is all that he can say, but even that tastes of Alex, of top shelf whiskey and the cinnamon he always adds to his coffee. Alex had spoken the word into Henry’s mouth on countless occasions, so he was all-too-familiar with the way it slipped off of his tongue so smoothly, as if the letters themselves were forged together just for him by some foul-mouthed god who knew the damage such a word might wreak in the possession of someone as fearless as Alexander Claremont-Diaz.

And this line lives in a little post lake house fic, the second fic I ever published in the RWRB fandom, called What If I Do?

Uncertain who's already done this, so I'm gonna leave this as an open tag for anyone who sees it and wants to share their incredible writing background with the world!

[margridarnauds]

Can I ask 3, 12, and 17? Thanks!

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

There was a lot of work I did this year that I was really proud of, even though I didn't have a large overall output, but probably..."Ce qui nous attire, nous sépare." I'm hoping to have a couple more WIPs published by the end of the year, but this one was very personal and very important to me in a way that isn't always obvious. I'd been working on it for a couple years, since I really started playing Assassin's Creed Unity during the pandemic, and it just kept being put on the shelf and kept being put on the shelf. And then...well, I've talked about what happened this year before, I'm not going to talk about ancient history again. It's done. Suffice it to say, something really bad happened to me that made me wonder if I could ever write again, especially for this fandom. Writing for this particular fandom was like pulling my own teeth out with Victorian dental gear, it was actively painful, it was bringing a lot of really bad memories, and I was in this really difficult space of "what do I do now? How do I move on from this? How do I make this *mine* again?" And I was doing that while I was going through a very difficult first year in my PhD program.

And then, this September, I was finally able to write something again. And it isn't my best, though I think it deserved a lot better than the number of hits it got, I kind of wish that people gave it a bit more of a chance beyond just seeing that it was an AC fusion and walking away, but that doesn't really matter, because what this fic *stands* for means a lot more.

I'm back, motherfuckers.

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

According to my last accounting, about 62, with one or two WIPs being added since then for a grand total of 64. Let's see if we can get it back to 62 for the New Year.

Your favorite character to write this year?

Honestly, I enjoyed a lot of what I put out this year, and I enjoyed pretty much all the characters I wrote for. I really enjoyed working with Mina again, she's always a delight and I was thrilled that people liked what I did with her because that was a fic I was terrified of writing; I enjoyed working with Eivor and Harald; I really enjoyed working with Bres again, especially since I think that a lot of my take on him has matured and crystalized in some ways in the last year, I'm really excited to see where we go with one another from here on out; I enjoyed Margrid and Orléans as always; I enjoyed working with the Resident Evil crew. The nice thing with being in a difficult place -- personally, professionally, etc., is that it meant that I was really in a very experimental place. There were a lot of things that I'd been putting off doing that I suddenly ended up doing. I was writing just about anything that would motivate me to write, and so a lot ended up published that might have been in the WIP folder indefinitely otherwise.

I would say that best in show was probably Lazare, which makes sense because he's kind of the Once and Future Blorbo, the Blorbo Eternal, next to Bres. Again, it was quite painful to work with him, it still can be, but it gave me the chance to work with him and Ronan in a way I'd never really been able to before, with a more mature, nuanced perspective. I feel, in general, that there was a very....nostalgic, melancholy tone to a lot of what I wrote this year, and it worked with the two of them, both as a couple and individually, because it meant that I got to write a version of them who've seen it all, done it all, and are settled but are still distinctively them and still distinctively dealing with surviving a revolution. I feel like, for the last...five years or so, a big hurdle with writing 1789 for me has always been me trying to figure out how to make these character relationships happen over the course of about three months, and now, I'm realizing that they don't have to, that we can extend this by decades if we want to.

[sniffanimal]

*procrastinates by journalling publicly on Tumblr*

something I worked on a little in therapy a while back but maybe I need to focus on and work on more myself is my obsessive need to be my own source of competency porn

like when I was 14 and a freshman, a senior asked me if I was excited for graduation and I said idk that's 3+ years away and he balked because he assumed I was a senior since I always seemed like I knew what I was doing. and that somehow became some sort of defining Moment for me that I was never able to shake fully. I can remember exactly what I was doing in the moment and who said it to me and everything it was that important to me.

I have this insane need to act like I'm hyper-competent and know exactly what I'm doing at all times, and to be the best at anything I can be in that moment. it's like perfectionism except less focused on the result being perfect and more on everyone thinking I'm perfect.

I think about work, and how I've decided to be fucking teachers pet again still, going above and beyond the scope of my job description for my classroom. I go to non-mandatory trainings and spend time outside of work putting together projects and curriculum and stuff. I thoroughly love being the one with all the answers when I can be.

I also pride myself on having impeccable research skills. I like to think I'm very good at getting sources, double checking information before I share it, diving deep to find the kind of information in looking for, keyword searches, database searches, etc. I don't do anything without knowing exactly how to do it first.

all this culminates in a guy who gets very very nervous when I'm faced with my actual real disabilities that can make me actually really struggle with things. A neurotypical/mentally well person probably doesn't need visual reminders for simple things and then 4 redundancies for when that reminder isn't effective. They probably are able to complete multiple tasks a day without forcing themselves to carry a laundry basket up and down stairs through searing back pain. They probably can eat enough food to fuel their brain and body without stomach pain or nausea. It's like imposter syndrome maybe, where I'm terrified people will find out that I have to work 10x as hard as other people to get things done. But paradoxically I wish people would acknowledge that I *am* working 10x as hard as they are to get things done.

I guess my point in posting this is if you feel like this behavior describes you as well, you're not alone. I am willing to bet this is very common in medium-support-needs-but-heavily-masking-autism-burnout folks. Maybe it's also common in people from other marginalized communities, like disabled and trans from my experience, but maybe also racial or other demographics, where you feel an obsessive need to be a model minority.

The last facet of this I want to explore is the guilt I feel when my brain reframes this all as "boo hoo I'm so good at doing things and it makes me sad", like I can't feel anxious and frustrated and burnt out about burning on my own pyre here, simply because other people are not good at things and they experience struggles based on not being good at those things. Maybe I'm just raised Catholic and so I feel guilty about everything I do, or maybe it is legitimate guilt that I can use to reframe my whole situation. But I think what it is is social guilt built off the idea of oppression/struggle Olympics. If I find walking up stairs often painful and exhausting, I should be grateful I can even walk because some people cant, etc etc type stuff.

I'm going to look for essays on this topic later, maybe some DBT worksheets that could be relevant. I'm not currently in therapy but like I said before, I'm really good at researching what I need. I need a different way of framing my perfectionism that gives me grace, not anxiety, when I fall short of it. I think I have some saved books from my reading list about perfectionism, maybe I'll start there.

[nasoleil]

The ADHD Work Mode hyperfixation kicked in like a motherfucker over the last three days (making me suspect I have been in Waiting Mode inadvertantly for the last two weeks somehow???) and I did two weeks' worth of work in that time. To the point where I actually fell asleep at 11:30pm last night, which is un-fucking-heard of. I'm almost never in bed before 1am.

My body hates me but my mind is (almost) satisfied.

The fam and I got a bunch of cleaning done. I packed all the Booktopia packages that I could pack (some folks still haven't completed their surveys) and I've got a USPS pickup scheduled for tomorrow (we'll see if they show up lmao) to get everything in the mail and off to its new homes.

A (my partner) and I were marveling that there were so many more people who wanted both books instead of just the one we were crowdfunding. People actually looked at our stuff and went "yeah you know what I want to learn more about that" which is still a bit boggling to me. (I'll get into why sometime later)

I'm excited and terrified. I really hope people like them. We don't just write fun little stories (tho there's absolutely nothing wrong with that), we bear our bleeding, beating hearts in our novels. I think writing is how I Cope, so it's no wonder I'm physically incapable of writing anything lighthearted (I've tried lmao)

Then because apparently Work Mode has its claws deep in me I also finalized the stuff I'm gonna send to the manu for Pintopia (which was a lot of cleaning up lineart, making vectors, doing Pantone colors and spec charts, etc, bc I'm trying to be as specific about what I want as possible). Prolly do that email tomorrow tho cuz I'm pretty wiped now.

Once the stuff with the manus is settled, I'll be going whole-hog into Pintopia's campaign page and then, finally, finishing up Book 3's edits.

I had done a prelim edit for a little over half of it a few weeks ago and really struggled with it for some reason. I think I'm starting to get sick of Business Stuff and Art (gods, I have done so much art lately ... which is an objectively good thing but also repetitive) and starting to feel the yearning to get back into the writing groove.

[yandere-daze]

AAAAAND the 4th part! Man, when I tell you this absolutely shook me up when I read this this afternoon. I know I said it before but please if you're interested in reading this story and come across my reblog: Read the story first! It deserves to be read unspoiled because it's just so well written!!

Really op, I can't thank you enough for writing this, I've been thinking about it all day and I think I will continue to for quite a while now dndnd

This story in particular just really hit all the right spots for me and I'm actually inclined to say that this might be one of my favorite yandere stories I've read to date. And that's saying something because I've certainly read a lot of them😉

There's just something so shocking and twisted about all the relevations in this 4th part and it's written in a way that still makes it all believable. There's many surprising things but it doesn't feel like it came out of nowhere. I think the previous parts made a good job of hinting at how truly unhinged Leon is in this (falsely arresting us to spend time with us, trying to harm Ashley because he's jealous) while still leaving some things ambiguous.

Now that I think about it, both of these things were actually really good foreshadowing for what happened to Claire here! Which btw, was really shocking oh my god!!! I knew things couldn't possibly go well for her, I didn't expect him to just murder her right in front of us.

And then, I think what hit me the most about this entire story is when Leon then turned around after killing her and arrested us for murder. At that point I was so pent-up that I had to get up and pace around my room to process things (that's a good thing!)

Also the AUDACITY of this man to coo and tell us that it "wasn't our fault" right after killing our best friend and arresting us for it???? I was so flabbergasted /pos

It just showed that Leon really wouldn't back away from anything to be with us.

Another really striking scene to me was right afterwards in the interrogation room, when Leon hugs our legs and has the audacity to cry while we're also crying out of sheer anguish. And he's not doing it because he realizes that killing Claire was bad or that she didn't deserve it, no. He's crying because of how her death affected us. Not because he just murdered someone out of petty jealousy. He's simply angry because the spark he loved left our eyes. I wonder who's responsible for that 🤔

And I can of skipped over it here but damn. There are a lot of other scenes I loved in this!

Special mention to the scene where we're dragged into the police station again and Leon is sleeping at his desk with our case file on his desk. First of all, him mumbling and whining our name in his sleep as we try to take our file away from him 💕

And the dreadful realization when we actually read what he wrote down. How he's thinking of ways to keep arresting us and pining crimes on us to keep us with him. Him using photos of our friends as shooting targets???? Sir, you're insane!! As if that wasn't obvious before

Also liked how the moment was done when Leon woke up. How delighted and excited he was to see us after just waking up, only to feel horrified when he realizes that we've read the file and know the truth. And how desperate he got then <3

Also oof to him killing Ashley and how absolutely nonchalant or even happy he you sounded about that. He obviously hated her and tried to risk her life many times during the 3rd part but I didn't think he would go through with it. I guess there was no point in holding back any more after everything he had already done.

And last but not least, when we wake up in the hospital with Leon sitting beside us, with a gun next to us. And him saying that he would end it all if we never woke up. Truly goes to show how deep this terrifying obsession with us runs. I frankly don't think we're ever going to get a chance to get away from him again. He already messed up once, he's not going to allow us to run again.

So yes, poor reader is absolutely traumatized after this entire ordeal and I certainly can't blame them.

Thank you so much author for writing this story once again, I truly loved reading it and will be thinking about it for a long time!!! ☺️💕💕

😍😍 OMG, I'm gonna be needing a part four to that Leon post stat.

(Love your writing it's amazing just like you are) ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🤎

part 1. part 2. part 3.

tw :: re4 spoilers, obsessive!leon, yandere!leon, violence, knives, tasers, guns, explosives, framing, murder, abuse of power, death of a character, physical restrainment, noncon touching, thoughts of suicide, being knocked unconscious, shit goes down basically.

⸺ thank u, honeybaby !!!!! i've been vv busy these past few days, but this man has been HEAVY on my mind. i've also been listening to playing dangerous by our lord and savior lana del rey on repeat and it had my brain conjuring up some ideas... (also this part is long so buckle up friends)

you see, you've been praying everyday to earn back those damned memories that slipped from your mind 6 years ago. but in a attempt to do so, all you can feel is a gun against your head, an explosion against your body, and dust permeating your lungs. all before the classic cut to black welcomes you. no crying mouse-ley, no crying guard-dog. just empty darkness. through the abyss, however, you are now able to unveil memories that were buried deep within you. and whether the return of these past events is a good thing or not is up to you.

you remember a late august evening. the cool air and descending leaves would calm you, but your current circumstances prevent you from any serenity. an anonymous tip to the RPD claimed that you were in possession of illegal substances. and somehow, those said drugs had magically appeared into existence within your home. this leaves you here, being driven to the station by the officer of the month, marvin branagh. despite everything, you're grateful marvin was the one to arrest you. you happen to favor him and his basic understanding of boundaries, as opposed to a certain mutt you know far too well.

it's safe to say you've now got quite the reputation in the RPD with how much trouble you get into. and especially with how quickly the problems seem to fade away. you're being escorted through the station until another officer complains to marvin about some kids with fake ID's. he leaves you by yourself at an empty desk with one hand cuffed to the armrest. the desk right beside leon's. you look to the blonde beside you. his head is rested against his arms folded upon his desk, deep in slumber. his cheek is squished against the surface of his arm, pushing his lips out into a duck-like pout. your mugshot peeks out from beneath his sleeping form. you swear through his unintelligible murmuring, you hear a gentle whimper of your name. marvin had mentioned during the drive how he was up all night looking through your case (wouldn't be the first time), but you can't find it in yourself to feel bad for him. you don't trust him. even several years ago, something within you has always prevented you from trusting him.

you fiddle with a mr. raccoon toy as 20 minutes slowly tread by. completely overcome with boredom, you peak over leon's shoulder to see your case file beneath him. maybe you could find something useful inside, like the bastard responsible for all these false claims. using your free hand, you manage to slyly slip your case folder from under his weight. not without a quiet whine of "no, y/n/n... don't leave me..." good god, was he cuddling your mugshot? (it would be the closest he could get to you physically, after all). you ignore him entirely, thanking the heavens that this man is such a deep sleeper.

opening the file, you find standard information about your case. you read through the notes leon left behind, which causes nausea to then stir in your stomach. he jotted down his worries of your case closing and not being able to keep you in the station any longer; there was ideas of any potential loopholes in the system he could take advantage of and prove your innocence. beside his rambling, there was a long list of certain ways he can frame you for crimes to reel you back into his clutches. what in the actual fuck? and just when you thought this situation couldn't get worse, you find he used pictures of your friends at the shooting range, bullet holes piercing through their paper faces.

you read through the evidence in shock, until a sickeningly-sweet tone gasps your name and pulls you out of your trance. you look over the folder to see those familiar blue eyes peering into yours. leon lights up like a golden retriever with a bone when he wakes up and you're the first thing he sees, metaphorical tail wagging and all. to dream of you and to be the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes, it is pure heaven! only, instead of the early morning, love-drunk haze within his dreams, he is instead met with the heartbreaking look of horror on your face. his eyes trail down to see you holding his notes and his heart sinks to the pit of his stomach. no, no, no, it wasn't supposed to be like this! it was never supposed to be like this! you were supposed to fall in love with him! you are supposed to be with him forever!

you are supposed to love him! you have to!

and you thought you've seen the worst, you thought you reached the bottom of the iceberg. but you were so, so wrong. it had been 2 weeks since you learned the truth about leon. since then, you were able to find solace within an old friend, claire redfield. not only do you adore her, but the layer of protection she had given you when you complained about the clingy cop on your hip was just the cherry on top. without leon, these 14 days were the most peace you have felt in what feels like months. you didn't know how the man who acted like he needed your presence more than air felt about this sudden separation. and to be completely honest, you didn't really care.

now, with your arm hooked around claire's, you two walk home after a night out in raccoon city. you're repeating old inside jokes and clutching your chest in heaps of rib-straining laughter. everything is full of high-spirits until you notice a certain cop car sitting in the street. claire enters your estate first, guarding you protectively while you follow her footsteps. you find (you guessed it!) no other than leon kennedy rummaging through your belongings. and the look on leon's face when he sees you with someone else is nothing short of pure anguish, sheer betrayal. he is jealous — so much so that it practically suffocates the room. you've seen plenty of emotions expressed by leon and the consequences that followed, but you've never seen first-hand what jealousy may compel him to do. considering the pictures of your friends he used as target practice, you feel as though the outcome won't be any good.

claire breaks the silence, "you disgusting pig! i'm calling my brother down here and he's gonna kick your-" her roar of anger is cut off with a sharp groan.

leon stands, taser gun in hand, as the electrodes strike into claire's body. she then falls to the ground with a loud thump, her form convulsing from the electric shocks waving through her. rushing to her side, you attempt to help her. but, you then cave into yourself when leon walks over in three large strides. and you now realize he is absolutely terrifying when he is jealous. his voice drops to a low husk as he demands you tell him who the fuck this is, a major contrast to the bubbly-puppy you're grown familiar with. you are left flabbergasted and are unable to mutter even a syllable.

you aren't even granted a mere second to compose of yourself before leon pulls a knife, plunging it deep into claire's chest. a scream of pure terror erupts from your throat. you're painted red as he relentlessly stabs your best friend, curling yourself into a corner and hiding your face in your arms. through your tear-stained vision, you see the lifeless body of claire and leon standing above her, huffing with fury like some blood-thirsty creature. something in his gaze perceptibly softens when he sees you, so scared and feeble. and it shatters his heart. after all, leon would take every life on planet earth just to see your lips curl into a smile, even once more. but, nothing could have prepared you for the words that would then leave his mouth.

he turns his body cam on. "y/n l/n, you are under arrest for the murder of... whoever this was. you have the right to remain silent. anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law." you stare at leon entirely flabbergasted, but you're too exhausted to fight against him.

he bends down to you, light whispers of "you're ok, it wasn't your fault" and "i've got you, sweet angel" doing little to comfort you. with his gentle hands against you, leon proceeds to cuff you with the same softness you would use to handle a baby bird. and you let him take you away, because you are too caught up in looking at your best friend who was laughing with you just minutes ago now dead on the ground. you cry to yourself in the backseat of the cop car the whole way to the station.

by the time you get there, you are entirely in a state of shock. tears of dread stream down your cheeks, but your face is nothing short of emotionless. you are so caught up in your head, you don't even notice the whispers of other officers there. they gossip about how considering your track record, it's no wonder you'd end up here for good. a sharp glare from the man guiding you through the department is enough for them to shut their mouths. you're then brought into an interrogation room, with cameras off and no other presence besides you and this mad-man at your beck and call.

cuffed to a chair once again, leon locks the door behind him. he then drops to his knees and ties his arms around your waist, burying his head into you. it takes several seconds for reality to hit you, but you soon realize he is crying. and if you weren't restrained currently, you would've pushed him off and made him suffer a fate far worse than what claire endured. now, the two of you are sobbing together, but for entirely different reasons. you, full of grief over someone you love being murdered just moments ago. leon, full of agony over how the gleam of emotion he was so infatuated with left your eyes. all because of him.

you muster enough strength to plead to the blonde, your voice coming out through hoarse, slurred sniffles. but much to your dismay, your cries fall on deaf ears. if only leon had more morality than he did love for you.

"i'm so sorry, y/n, i just needed to hold you. even for just one last time” he picks his head up to look at you, face breaking out in a pitiful smile. “and i can't lose you. not again.” he grabs hold of your hands from behind your back and begins caressing the digits of your fingers. and the contrast between his smile and the crazed look in his eyes has you shuddering in apprehension.

"you're stuck with me to the end."

your eyes then flutter open to see a blinding white light; you begin to hear the quiet chant of a monitor beside you. where the hell am i? despite your current confusion, all you can think about is how you grieved for your best friend in the grimy cells of the RPD, how everyone turned into undead creatures just a week later, and how leon protected you from anything as small as a paper cut. you remember how several zombies overpowered him and how you took advantage of the opportunity, running like hell away and out of raccoon city. you remember the burning of your lungs, the rain on your skin, the hope of getting far, far away from this nightmare. you also remember the fear you felt when umbrella snatched you into their possession, to where you would soon forget everything that happened. including leon kennedy.

you're in the present now, as you can tell by the sheepskin jacket around your form and the hospital bed you're laid upon. it takes you too long to realize that you're safe, out of the hellhole that is los iluminados. looking down, you find a gun sitting by your hip (leon made the declaration that if you were to never wake up again, he wouldn't hesitate to end it all right then and there). you shift your train of sight to see leon at your bedside with his head in his hands while his entire body trembles with trepidation. the sight of this lovesick maniac at your side causes you to spring forward with a harsh gasp. his heartbeat skyrockets at the sudden occurrence. you're alive, and leon can't stop the tears of relief that fall from his eyes.

"hi, pretty... i'm here, you're safe now..." the smile on his face is borderline terrifying. his hands cup your face, practically clinging onto you like a lifeline.

"i remember... i remember everything..." the statement is entirely said to yourself, your gaze distant and not entirely there.

his eyebrows scrunch upwards, gaze softening (if it can even soften more than it already has). leon then pulls your face to his and molds his lips against yours aggressively, desperately. it isn't soft, sweet, or romantic in any sense. it is inexperienced, but overflowing with raw passion, need, and obsession. he only stops when the two are you are breathless and gasping for air. a dreamy sigh escapes leon's lips once he parts from you, gazing into your eyes as if you were something holy (which you are, obvi, but i digress). leon is so horrifically, irrevocably, disgustingly in love with you. and you can feel everything in his all-too overwhelming kiss.

he then engulfs you and melts into your arms like a noodle in boiling water. his light-headed, lovesick laughter fans against your neck. leon somehow pulls you impossibly closer to him, almost as if he were trying to morph the two of you together. it is too much; he is all you can feel, smell, touch. but, without a sliver of strength in your body, you are entirely vulnerable to him and his captivation.

"ashley... she didn't make it..." there’s a certain tone in leon's voice you can’t explain, but you shudder beneath it, anyway. he tells the information softly, but his voice is full of too much exhilaration to be normal. with these newfound memories, that dread returns to your stomach at the thought of what leon is capable of. what leon may have done to ashley while you were out cold.

through the abyssal darkness, your wish has been granted. you have now retrieved all lost memories.

and now, you know why you never were able to trust leon kennedy.

the end !! hehe, thanks for the fun ride babes.

HOWEVER……….. this is surely not the end of my resident evil stained brainrot. so i will not be continuing this series, but i will most certainly be pouring out everything in my RE-obsessed brain. only if u would like to see it, of course. if u do, pls send me some asks!! and thank u again !!!

[frozaru]

Hello and welcome!

A lot happened yesterday in the new Nintendo Direct from many of the big franchises. It had started off weak imo but credit where it's due, got better as things went on! I have much to talk about so let's get on with the show.

𝙋𝙄𝙆𝙈𝙄𝙉 4

The game to kick off this direct. I will admit that it does look visually pretty, and the new pooch is certainly cute! There's chances for a lot of chaotic fun no doubt. I've never tried a Pikmin game before, and whilst it does not interest me enough to say "buy now", I hope people will enjoy this game. We already know a certain blue puppet went crazy over this. 😉 Perhaps I'll take another look when Pikmin 4 goes on sale one day. The game releases on July 21st, 2023.

𝙎𝘼𝙈𝘽𝘼 𝘿𝙀 𝘼𝙈𝙄𝙂𝙊: 𝙋𝘼𝙍𝙏𝙔 𝘾𝙀𝙉𝙏𝙍𝘼𝙇

An unexpected surprise from Sega happened! This will be the first Samba De Amigo game since 23 YEARS AGO (as of Dreamcast release). Dancing games are not really my thing but hey, maybe this one will be unique enough to consider me giving it a shot! It releases sometime this summer.

𝙎𝙋𝙇𝘼𝙏𝙊𝙊𝙉 3: 𝙀𝙓𝙋𝘼𝙉𝙎𝙄𝙊𝙉 𝙋𝘼𝙎𝙎

If anything, this announcement was the main course for me! Just...wow. ♡ As someone who started within Splatoon 2, it's going to be so fascinating to explore Inkopolis Plaza for my very first time! Also SQUID SISTER SPLATFESTS ARE BACK! I already know @atlantisportal2 is about to have a nostalgia trip. I'm so freaking excited! 😁 Not only that...but Side Order is looking VERY intriguing for me.

Could this be a corrupt version of what happened if Team Order won Splatoon 2: Final Splatfest? Also Pearl and Marina baby, woohoo! Very glad seeing them back along with what looks to be Agent 8. Also you better believe I purchased it ASAP! With that said, wave 1 is set to release sometime in Spring with wave 2 inkcoming (haha) somewhere on the holidays (according to placeholder dates).

𝘼𝘿𝙑𝘼𝙉𝘾𝙀 𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙎 1+2: 𝙍𝙀-𝘽𝙊𝙊𝙏 𝘾𝘼𝙈𝙋

I haven't got much to say about these games, however, I did like what they've shown so far and looking to pick it up sometime in future if reviews are looking good. Like the artstyle they're going for! They will be avaliable on April 21st.

𝙉𝙎𝙊: 𝙂𝘼𝙈𝙀 𝘽𝙊𝙔+𝙂𝘼𝙈𝙀 𝘽𝙊𝙔 𝘼𝘿𝙑𝘼𝙉𝘾𝙀

More games for the service? Yes freaking please! It took a while but now they're here. The games really whizzed by and it would be impossible to put them all here, so if you'd like a glimpse of what I'm personally interested in, take a look. Take your time. 😊 *Tick tick tick* Oh, you're back? Lovely! Nintendo really popped off with the choices imo (looking at you Wario Land 3 and Mario+Luigi Superstar Saga). Some of these games are being released today with others being added in the future.

𝙋𝙇 𝘼𝙉𝘿 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙉𝙀𝙒 𝙒𝙊𝙍𝙇𝘿 𝙊𝙁 𝙎𝙏𝙀𝘼𝙈

A miracle has happened!! After tragic events with both Level 5 and the original creator years ago, Professor Layton is looking to make a return. I've not played any of these games yet which judging by general buzz, I'm missing out! Hope to see more details soon as they come and maybe look into this considered-to-be underrated series in future. A release date has not been confirmed yet.

𝙏𝙇𝙊𝙕: 𝙏𝙀𝘼𝙍𝙎 𝙊𝙁 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙆𝙄𝙉𝙂𝘿𝙊𝙈

GANON IS BACK AND MORE TERRIFYING THAN EVER! With an amazing reveal of more info, this game is shaping up to be something great already. The visuals, music, and maybe even voice acting...it leaves me impressed. The gameplay could even be a step up with new weapon types and tools among other things (we can make our own cars legit now!?) However, it also reminds me that I need to finish BOTW someday. 😅 I'll be sure to look into this game at some point. Sharpen your blade and prepare for adventure on 12th May, 2023...

(Tysm for getting up to this point reader, it's been wonderful writing it all. I'm still not done yet though and might do part 2 in future. Take care! 👋

🎴My Carrd

[moorishflower]

10 Sandman Fic Recs!

I was struck by the absolutely heady and incredible thought that I have reached a. 800+ followers, and b. can place upon your dashboards the fics of friends and also people with whom I would enjoy being friends, and who I think should get more attention. There's going to mostly be Not the Big Fics in this particular list (I will rec all the big ones I'm readin later!)

Therefore, in no particular order, and containing everything from gen, to Dreamling, to Hobrintheus (or w/e the name for it is lol), ~fic recs~

I'm so sorry that you have to have a body by Taxonamie (AO3, Gen, Teen & Up)

A different take on Dream's capture; Dream's POV.

I DO love some good old body horror, and this fic does SUCH a good good job of really exploring what it'd be like for something that's supposed to be Endless to suddenly be trapped in a continuously dying and rebirthing flesh suit. EXTREME Lady Amalthea vibes. Immaculate.

2. Holy Palmer's Kiss by quentintoo (AO3, Dreamling, General Audiences)

Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss.

I'm pretty sure this was the fic that sparked my intense obsession with longing and like, hand-touching and hand-kissing. Scintillating and sweet.

3. to sleep—perchance to dream by fishydwarrows (AO3, Dreamling, Explicit)

Hob Gadling remembers the night of 1889 well. He dreams and dreams of ways it could've been different, but dreams are often a way of escaping a more terrible reality.

For me THEE Hob whump fic, because if you're going to have an immortal why not make him miserable for a time? Mind the tags, but the payoff is SO, so good. I've read this, I think, at least a half-dozen times.

4. Heat Wave by spqr (AO3, Dreamling, Explicit)

“Sounds like you’re horny to me,” says Matthew.

Somewhat similarly, this for me is THE "Hob Gadling fucks and fucks severely" fic. Everything spqr writes is solid gold, but Dream being Endlessly Horny for his good old friend is both amusing and SCREAMINGLY hot.

5. Eros in Pragma by Delta_Pavonis (AO3, Dreamling, Explicit)

In all his long centuries never had he really done something like this. It was exciting and terrifying and exhilarating and too many emotions all mashed together. He felt like his skin was vibrating. Deep breath in. He could do this. He wanted to do this, desperately wanted to, a desire from deep in his bones. And yet… long breath out. Hob walked over to one of his bedside tables and opened the drawer. There was only one item contained therein and he removed it with shaking hands. The silver buckle jingled softly.

Here's a fun fact! I neither read nor wrote a lot of D/S before I got into Sandman, and now I do, and it's almost entirely because of this fic!

6. I have lately learned the difference by Chthonion (AO3, Dreamling, Mature)

While Dream is imprisoned, Hob dreams of prisons, until, one by one, all of them take the same shape: a glass cage. Hob doesn't realize why until he meets Dream again, and the dreams don’t stop afterward. Trauma, connection, and adventures in accidentally mixing two people’s subconscious demons together in the dreamscape.

This is just. SO good. I love anything that explores Dream's trauma wrt his imprisonment but chooses to do so through Dream's mindscape, and this delivers in spades. Let Hob Gadling smash more snowglobes 2k22.

7. point-set triangulation by therm0dynamics (AO3, Hob/Corinthian, Teen & Up)

Hob knows he is dreaming. He also knows he’s being hunted.

The dynamic between Hob and the Corinthian is FASCINATING -- they're truly mirrors of each other, both hungry for humanity, both wanting, both bound up in cosmic Endless bullshit. This is fairly tame, for the Corinthian, so if you're squeamish I can assure you that this is more psychological than visceral. There's an absolutely smoking hot sequel, though.

8. the pleasant punishment by romanticallyinept (AO3, Hob/Dream/Corinthian, Explicit)

“All right,” Hob says, fairly evenly, he thinks, for what he’s been presented with. “Would someone like to explain what’s going on?” Dream has the decency to look slightly abashed, as if he only just realized that he showed up, unannounced, in his friend’s flat, with a nightmare in tow. But it’s only slightly, because he’s still Dream. “I would not ordinarily involve a human in the discipline of one of my creations,” he says, inclining his head slightly, “but you are no ordinary human, Hob Gadling.” One day, one day, Hob will learn to keep his fool mouth shut.

Hey you know how I said I didn't used to be into D/S dynamics

Well if you weren't either, give this one a try. Gentle dom!Hob punishes a recalcitrant Corinthian while Dream watches. Surprisingly tender, incredibly sexy, lots of feel good subdrop soothing afterwards.

9. A Dream of Stars by jehannaford (AO3, Gen, General Audiences)

After the events of Watership Down, Fiver has a dream and is offered a choice. A very short story.

This is super short, super sweet, and super poignant. It's like 200 words, and it's worth every second of your time.

10. as long as this body shall endure by andunetir (AO3, Dreamling, Explicit)

Hob loves eating pussy. (He knows he shouldn’t be thinking about this at school, but it’s free period and the Year Elevens are more than capable of supervising themselves, so sue him, he’s bored.)

There's not a ton of fic that explores gender through Hob's point of view, but this is one I keep coming back to again and again. Trans!Hob gives me ALL kinds of life, and this is a fascinating exploration of immortality and transness. Also, again, it's super hot.

[midnightdevotion]

Lost

Part 3 of the safe series

Warnings: Domestic Violence, angst

2.3k

a/n: I've never been so nervous to post something in my life, I hope you guys like it! ps it is not proof read.

It's been three weeks since you got that text, and you haven't relaxed since. Constantly looking over your shoulder, waiting on bated breath for the ball to drop. You felt bad for relying on Bradley so much, You've only known the man for four months and yet here you are essentially living with him and attached to his hip whenever he isn't busy with work.

You're terrified he's going to get sick of you, that he will realize maybe you aren't worth all this trouble. It would be so much easier for him to go find someone else with so much less baggage.

"I can hear you thinking from over here honey, whats going on" Penny's melodic voice breaks your toxic thought process.

"I just- I hate being such a burden" what you don't expect is the scoff that comes from her mouth.

"You are not a burden, everyone adores you and we all want to help." you sigh at her words, of course it's not that you don't believe her, but years of abuse and being told you aren't worth anything is hard to unlearn.

Continuing your busy work of cleaning glasses for when the rush starts coming in soon, trying to just turn off your mind. You and Penny work in seamless harmony, getting everything prepped and you are so thankful for the woman who's humming under her breath next to you.

"Excited to see Mav?" you question, letting out a real grin as she shoots you a glare.

"You know it's not like that" She quips back at you, but you just laugh.

"Oh really, so Amelia didn't see him climbing out of your window two nights ago?" When you see her shocked face looking at you, you can't help the laughter that bubbles out of you. You missed joking around with penny like this, hating that for the last three weeks, almost all happiness drained from your bones. She playfully whips you with her rag, as you wiggle your eye brows at her.

"Oh stop it" It's rare to see penny so shy, she clearly has real feelings for maverick, but you knew that the first time you saw the older pilot walk through the doors.

As if fate designed it yourself you see from the corner of your eye, your favorite group of aviators walk in. As Mav makes a beeline straight for Penny and you can't help the whisper that escapes you.

"Not like that my ass" and you know Penny hears you because she bumps her hip into yours, before focusing all the rest of her attention on the handsome pilot. It's not two seconds later your own handsome pilot makes his way to the bar.

"I forgot you were working earlier today, was sad when you weren't home" The way he refers to his house as 'home' for both of you has your stomach in knots or maybe those are butterflies? He watches as you flush behind the counter.

"I- um...how was your day" you finally land on, and you ignore the way his lips tilt up. He knows you well enough to know that you aren't good with emotions, and anything that makes you feel flustered is even worse because of what you went through.

"It was great sweetheart, better now though. How was your day" and he knows he lays it on thick but he can't help it, he loves the way you flush and the way you glance up at him through your pretty lashes.

"Oh um, good mine was good" and he loves the small smile that pops up on your face. He's hated that the last three weeks has taken away your smile. You already reach for his regular order, and he's grinning at you when you hand him his usual beer.

"I've got a surprise for you after work" and your head tilts to the side in question.

"Bradley you don't need to do anything for me" you can't help the guilt that swallows you whole. He's already done so much to help you, and you feel like you haven't done anything for him in return.

"I know sweetheart, but I wanted too" his hand wraps around your wrist, gently rubbing his thumb over the inside of it. You can't look at his eyes and you are genuinely thankful when Hangman calls him over to play some pool. Giving you a reprieve from the suffocating feelings you feel for him.

The night is going smoothly, busy enough that you genuinely forget the chaos that your life is at the moment. You felt refreshed, yeah your night wasn't peaceful physically by any means but after three weeks of your thoughts eating you alive, having a break from that felt energizing.

"pens let me" You gesture to the trash bags she was about to pick up, she raised her eyebrow, almost questioning if you were sure before she decided to let you.

You grab the heavy trash bags and head around the back of the hard deck. Flipping the lid to the large dumpster, you start throwing away the bags one by one. You're humming Great Balls of Fire under your breath, not focusing on your surroundings at all. You know you should've been more cautious.

You feel a hand wrap around your face and cover your mouth, effectively muffling the scream you let out. You know exactly who it is when you smell the tangy smell of sweat and cigarette smoke. It makes you want to vomit. You feel him push you up against the wall of the dumpster. The terror running through your veins more than ever before.

His left hand still pressed against your mouth, and you feel tears leaking out of your eyes, praying penny notices that you're still gone. His other hand is squeezing your wrist tightly, and you are not foolish, you know it's because that's where Bradley last touched you.

"you stupid little bitch. Thought you could get away from me." His breath smells like Whiskey and it makes you cringe. "I'll remind you who you belong to"

That's when your instincts finally kick in, for the first time ever it's fight. You bite down on his hand, disgusted by the taste but nothing is going to stop you now. You bring your leg up and knee him between the legs. He lets go of you in surprise and you take off. You're almost around the corner when you feel him grab your wrist.

You try some of the moves Bradley taught you one slow Sunday at his place, ramming your palm straight up into his nose. It doesn't slow him for long, he throws you onto the ground. You scramble to get up, not giving in like you use to. He sends a devastating blow to your stomach and blood is dripping out of your mouth.

He pulls you up by the hair, before he throws you back against the ground. Not expecting this your head slams against the ground. Your vision goes blurry, and you are crying harder. This is it, you know it. That's when you hear it. The man you love's voice, panicked.

"Get the fuck away from her" and you've never heard that level of anger come from the sandy haired pilot. You see penny rushing to you, but your vision is starting to go black. The last thing you register is Bradley tackling your ex to the ground.

____

Earlier in the day.

Rooster had an extra skip in his step today. The private investigator he hired had recovered some evidence that might be enough to get your piece of shit ex arrested. Even hangman couldn't get under his skin.

His day only getting better when he sees you teasing Penny. He hasn't seen you be yourself in weeks and it was killing him slowly. He was excited to tell you about the private investigator and tell you the good news. Hoping you would be happy and not mad at him for hiding this from you.

He let himself get called away from the bar, even if he wanted to get lost in you forever. He is having a good time with his fellow aviators. Always volunteering to go get the refills, everyone knew why.

It had been time for a refill when he looked back up and noticed you weren't behind the bar. He furrows his brow, thinking to himself that you must just be grabbing something from the back for Penny. However, when he catches her eye, she looks worried. He pushes through the crowd in a quick manner.

"Penny where's-" he doesn't get to finish as she talks over him.

"she took the trash out Rooster- it's been too long." that's all he needs to hear. Rushing out of the bar and towards the trash cans, he hears your sobs and his heart is racing.

He doesn't pay any attention to who follows him out of the bar. His eyes land on your form, seeing crimson drip from your lips and Rooster has never wanted to kill someone until today. He takes off towards the man standing over you, and tackles him to the ground with a force that he's never used. Immediately situating himself to throw punch after punch to his face. He's soon pulled off by Jake and Bob, barely registering anything happening around him. He's frantically looking around.

"Bradley!" He finally focuses enough to hear mavericks voice calling out to him. Everything is moving too fast and in slow motion all at once. He looks over to see Penny crying and she's on the phone with her hand to your neck.

It's like he had ice dumped over his head, all the anger he was feeling moved to the back burner as he was overtaken with horror that you might not be okay. He shakes off the other aviators and rushes to you, grabbing your hand.

"please baby you have to make it through this, you can't leave me, not now..not like this" and he feels like it hurts to breathe, and his heart is aching in a way he's not familiar with, and Bradley Bradshaw is very familiar with grief.

The ambulance arriving leaves Bradley watching them put you onto a stretcher, loading you into the back quickly and next thing he knows the sirens are blaring and you're being driven away from him.

Maverick is quick, moving to support Bradley and he barely even registers being taken to his car. The police are arriving and he knows they will need a statement later but he doesn't give them a second glance.

Maverick puts him into the passenger seat, quickly rounding the car and he's not even sure when maverick got his keys from him, but the older father like figure is pulling out of the parking lot quickly.

"Don't let her die dad" and Rooster is sure this has to be a fever dream, praying up to his dad is something he does in any hard or scary situation but nothing compares to the fear he is feeling in this moment. Maverick swallows hard, he didn't know you and Bradley were a serious thing, but seeing his godson with distant eyes and shaking hands he knows, Bradley is in love with you.

When they get to the hospital, Maverick makes him get his hands checked out. Useless if you ask Bradley, he couldn't care less about his hands at the moment. Being given the clear that his hands would be find, no breaks and no stitches needed.

He rushes back to the waiting room. This has to be torture. Every time a doctor walks by he holds his breath. The entire waiting room is filled with the rag tag group of aviators from the dagger team plus Penny and Amelia.

It's 9 agonizing hours later when a doctor finally walks into the waiting area. When he hears your name being said he shoots up. Not a single soul breathes as they await to hear what is happening with you.

"She took a really hard hit to the head which is where most of our concern is. Her ribs are bruised and her wrist is sprained, but she cracked the back of her skull open when she hit the ground. She has a severe concussion and we are worried about swelling. Right now she is in an induced coma, to try and combat the swelling. We estimate that it should go down within a week, but if it doesn't we will have to take her in for brain surgery" It's like the ground is stolen from beneath him. He nods his head, and thanks god that Maverick is there, because he is asking the doctor questions.

"when can I see her" Bradleys voice is raw, as he chokes out the only question that he has on his mind.

"Well, normally we wouldnt allow visitors with it being past 2 am but, if you are quiet we will let you see her, just one at a time though." the Doctor answers. Rooster can see the sympathy in her eyes but he doesn't care, all he has wanted since your hand was ripped away from his was to see you.

He's nervously tapping his hand against his leg as the elevator takes him up. Floor 11. The doors finally ding and he rushes out, frantically looking for room 1118. When he finds it, he stands directly outside the door for a good five minutes before working up the nerve to push it open.

When he does, the tears that have been openly going down his face all night rush out faster. He sees all the cords and iv's sticking out of you and it makes him feel sick. He slowly makes his way over to you, gingerly grabbing your hand.

He just sits there, forehead against your hand for what has to be an hour, tears streaming down his face. The last thing he remembers before passing out holding your hand is mumbling the words "darling please- I need you to be okay- please please please" and feeling so lost.

____

Taglist:

@lunamoonbby @m3laniehearts @frenchtoastix @gspenc @n3ssm0nique @isieoop @rintheemolion @tooflef @justanothermagicalsara @halo-mystic @ladym-17 @captainmarvelnerd @alanadetigy  @luckyladycreator2  @multiplefandomsmess  @tkmarvel-divergentbish @ohh-to-be-a-frog @roosterschanelslut @kayleegrace117

[robinismywife]

Where reader acting as Priscilla is her first ever role so she’s extremely nervous but Austin finds it cute she comforts her.

As a writer I understand you gotta go with your own flow so change and add whatever you please if you do up doing this 💓

𝐒𝐭𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧

PAIRING: Austin butler x actress!fem!reader

WARNINGS: self-doubt. Inform me if I've missed any!

A/N: This was my first request ever and I'm so excited owhfowrugi- Anyways, I hope you like my take on your idea my beloved anon and I'm SO sorry for being so late! Plz fill my inbox with more of your requests it makes me so happy and they are so fun to write!! Enjoy my loves <3

(the gif is not mine but omg it's so adorable I couldn't resist)

Baz Luhrmann was making an Elvis biopic and after having found Austin as his Elvis, he desperately needed to find himself a Priscilla. You had sent in an audition tape but never thought it would get you here, on the set and ready to film. I mean, everything felt unreal and you were extremely out of your comfort zone.

You had been filming for a couple of months now, but you've never felt as nervous and terrified as you're feeling at this very moment. Baz had informed you a week prior that today you would be doing the argument between Priscilla and Elvis. Nevertheless, it was now when you're getting ready for the scene that it's finally settling in.

You were pasing back and forth mumbling your lines, when Baz informed everyone that the cameras were ready. You and Austin walked on the set and smiled at each other, knowing that this scene was difficult for both of you.

"And...Action!"

"Cilla, I give you everything you could want" Austin followed you down the stairs

"What I wan't is a husband!" You turned around facing him. Austin had such a raw expression on his face, his acting always seemed to amaze you. However, here you were finding it extremelly hard to channel Priscilla.

"I- I-" You froze. Well done, Y/n, you forgot your lines. Not only are you a horrible actress but you also have a shitty memory. That's when you felt a warm hand on your shoulder.

"Y/n, did you forget your line?" Worry covered Austin's face "Did I do something wrong?"

"I- No, I just- I need some air" You dropped your prop, walked quickly past the crew. You opened a door and found yourself in the parking lot. You had never used this exit before and god it was freezing.

You began to spiral, thinking of the beautiful set you just walked out off, the incredible costumes you wore everyday. How are you even here right now? How did Baz even pick you? An amateur actress, who's never even stepped in a drama school once. You felt embarassed being on that set with such an amazing actor such as Austin, who is so dedicated to his craft. You didn't deserve this.

"Y/n, what happened back there?" Austin had at last found you.

"Austin.." you sighed looking down at your bell-bottom jeans

"Hey," he grabbed your shaking hand, rubbing circles on your cold skin "You can talk to me"

"I don't think I want to, Aus-" Your cheeks heated up, suddenly feeling embarrassed of saying anything

"You know, you're cute when you're like this- All stubborn" Austin smirked at you. Not in a condescending way but in a comforting one.

"I'm not stubborn I just-" You giggled a little, your mood getting better just by looking at him

"Yeah? I don't believe ya hun"

"Austin!" You groaned, knowing that talking to someone about your feelings was the best thing you could do right now.

"Y/n!" He said back, teasing you like he always did

"Fine, fine! Jeez- I just think that, you know, perhaps Baz made a mistake casting me and-"

"Hey, hey, hey- Why would you think that Y/n? You deserve to be here, you got the part because there's no one like you out there"

"But-"

"No but's, Y/n" He looked down at you with so much appreciation that you felt like crying "You know I love working with you. You're one of the most talented people I've ever met-"

"You mean that?" Your face lit up, making Austin smile as well

"Of course I do- Now go back on that set and show them what you got, yeah?"

"Yeah"