#I've lived in really rural areas all my life where there was very limited/no access to public transport

[incorrectpizza]

why are cities so confusing

[pynkhues]

growing up in a cattle station family in rural Australia has its own very real baggage

curious to know more about this

(x)

Mmm, I mean, rural Australia is its own beast, I guess, anon? My mum's from Mareeba which is way up in rural FNQ and her father / my grandfather worked in agriculture up there, so I've spent a lot of time in those sorts of towns, and while it's different from the region Sam grew up in, rural culture in Australia - particularly rural agricultural life - is generally isolating, politicised, cut off from services from healthcare to schools (I don't know why Sam went to school in Sydney obviously, but at the same time I Know Why because rural schools are underresourced, understaffed, and basically agricultural schools) and sometimes even the internet (I've worked in towns where a portable library in a truck would come to towns once a week and would literally be the only internet that town would get as the broadband infrastructure didn't work), and plagued by natural disasters - the area he grew up in in particular is extremely vulnerable to devastating bush fires almost every year.

For context, Australia's landmass is a similar size to the US, but where America's population is 335 million, Australia's population is 26 million. So think about the US, then subtract 210 million people. That's reflected in the economy, it's reflected in regional services, it's reflected in accessibility, it's reflected in capacity for community and connection, it's reflected in everything, because the myth about parts of the country being unliveable is exactly that - a myth. People live - and have lived for tens of thousands of years - all over this country, and Australia's small population size is reflective really of an attempted genocide of Indigenous peoples, the country's global status as a fairly weak middle power, a small economy, a 'young' country in terms of colonisation (Australia was colonised in 1788, but we have the longest still living culture in Aboriginal Australians, who've been here for at least 65,000 years), and, frankly, our historically racist immigration policies.

But putting that aside - - a personal anecdote; when I was at the writers centre, we helped facilitate a workshop with a food writer in the town of Julia Creek, which is a town of about 500 people (it was a part of a broader tour of rural Q). In that, one woman in attendance had driven 10 hours to come, 4 hours of which were her driving off her own sheep station. That might sound nice, but remember a lot of this landscape out there is this:

(Julia Creek!)

Or the Monaro region, where Sam's from, is a lot of the time like this:

It took that woman four hours to drive from her front door to even a road that would take her off her own land, let alone connect her to other people (and we do see the result of that in domestic violence here, but that's a whole other kettle of fish). That's what I mean when I talk about the isolation of regions like this in rural Australia. We do have some services - the Royal Flying Doctors Service literally flies doctors to people like this as a part of healthcare, right? - but on a day-to-day level, people are - - contained, for better sometimes, but I personally think mostly for worse.

Look, my point is that rural Australia is not easy country to live on, and the harshness of the landscape is intensely tied up in Australian concepts of machismo and a romanticised culture of masculinity, which in itself is tied up in what I like to call racism-but-for-mates culture (i.e. fuck off, we're full [genuine tagline of racists here], oh, but not Muhammad down the road, he's my mate], general homophobia, a culture of anti-intellectualism and also a general desperation to survive a landscape and political situation that resents you for being there (because trust me, the Australian government resents having to deliver regional services to pockets of 500 people ala those in Julia Creek).

The limitations of resource - from education to libraries to literally the internet (especially after the bungled rollout of the NBN - we're 82 in the world for internet speed lol, it's bad even in the cities) - are inherently tied up in that, which makes existing in those environments just overall weighted and complicated and tied up in identity politics that are usually contaminated by conservative ideologies. Which when you're an artist, regardless of whether or not you're a writer, painter or actor is complicated.

Plus the area he's from in particular (the Monaro / Snowy Mountains region) is heavily politicised at the moment due to the conversation around brumbies (the Australian word for feral wild horses and the need to cull them), climate change and colonialism. There's a pretty good documentary about it that came out recently if you're interested at all. Here's the trailer:

[captainsquality]

heyoo i live in northeast kansas and also lived in small towns in kentucky and pennsylvania when I was fairly young.

Now, my hometown is the state's capital city. It's somewhere roughly in the 'mid-size' range as far as towns go, and is a half hour drive away from one of the biggest cities in the state, and an hour away from Kansas City on the border of here and missouri.

This northeastern portion of Kansas isn't plains yet, and much of the great plains, contrary to some belief, isn't level flatland- which I can attest, as my family drove across the entire state to hike in colorado every summer when I was a child and our financial situation was better.

That aside, this corner is one of the more densely populated areas of the state.

Even then, though, there's still a lot of farmland peppered throughout, even within some cities. The neighborhood my parents and I just moved to is near a highway, several major streets, some schools and parks and we have several restaurants and two grocery stores within a five minute drive. The highway gives us relatively easy access to the south side of town where most medical facilities are, as well as the homes of all our family in town(all my mom's younger siblings and my older brother and his wife).

Here on the north side of town, across the river, things quickly move from the more bustling business district across the bridge to less and less populated as you go.

I've been all over this region of the state for all kinds of things in my life and I need you guys from the coast or from more heavily urban areas to understand that even here, in my hometown, which has a lot of good facilities and restaurants, schools, etc, the population distribution varies pretty widely.

Our neighborhood isn't far from many of the things we need, but that is largely in part because we have reasonably working vehicles to get to those places. Even if public transport infrastructure were fucking FANTASTIC here, it wouldn't be a consistently accessible option for any of the three of us.

This is because all three of us are disabled. Mom, in particular, is partially wheelchair bound because after getting longhaul covid in spring of 2020 she's got a weakened heart and respiratory system and chronic fatigue syndrome.

dad and I both have chronic pain and illness issues, though that physical aspect is much more severe for him.

My problems are largely mental health. depression, anxiety and ADHD, all diagnosed before I was even in fifth grade. VERY severe PTSD. More than likely I am autistic as well, but I'm too old to get a Clinical Diagnosis. And finally, riding on the tail of that PTSD, I am clinically diagnosed with moderate level agoraphobia.

If I drive out of town, toward the big college city half an hour away where the skate shop and noodle restaurant I really love are, I pass through two or three VERY VERY small towns on the way. Places that are barely a blip, a couple of miles with a reduced speed limit. A couple of gas stations, etc.

And of course there's also a LOT of farmland. A lot of farmland and a lot of brushland and creeks and streams.

And, of course, houses. In various sizes and conditions, speckled and dotted about, real far away from each other. Real far away from even the nearest cell tower.

Anyway all this is me talking way too much to affirm that truly it is a horrible, stupidass idea to think we should eliminate/abandon cars completely.

It doesn't just leave rural folks hanging out to dry, it fails to account for the situations of partially functional but still disabled people, for whom public transit isn't always doable- even if it's affordable.

We need much, much less dependency on cars, but that shouldn't mean 'BURN IT ALL'.

What it means, for now, is that we just need to invest in additional options. Public transport, infrastructure, that sort of thing- those should be highly prioritized, obviously!

But remember this is a very large country, and the layout and infrastructure and what is most realistic, most accessible, most ideal, is going to look very different depending on the area, and also on the individual needs of the people who live there. saying 'get rid of all cars' is dismissive and reductive.

The other thread on this was started by chuds so I'm gonna reboot it myself: it's really sad that people don't understand the Midwest is where food gets grown and we're supposed to grow a lot more of it.

Suggesting people just move to the cities is astonishingly clueless and would only make the situation worse. Some Americans have truly no idea what it's like out there, tiny communities separated by hour long drives if you even have transport, millions of people really are just abandoned and left behind by what we consider progress and have no way out.

[traumabrained]

Tw for abuse So my parents abuse me, mostly physical from my mother, mostly verbal from my father. I've always coped with the abuse by acting calm and taking it, hiding, or attempting to descalate it and hoping I don't piss them off further. But recently I've started to act out with anger. Not just with them, with my little sister who yells as much as my father, and with animals. Not the ones I own, though. I'm afraid. What's happening to me? I shouldn't be angry. Being angry gets you killed.

while its certainly frightening, its also (as far as i can tell, with my own experiences and the experiences of others i’ve talked to) a normal response. essentially, either your brain thinks it’s safer and is deciding to start processing trauma (which doesn’t seem likely), or else you and your brain are both fed up. there’s really always a limit to how much someone can take, and it looks like you’ve reached that limit. since that can get you in trouble and also cause collateral damage (to the animals, or to your little sister, though “collateral damage” doesnt include self defense), i’m going to give you a few tips that might help you deal with the anger in a way that won’t make your parents abuse even worse.

 (please note that since i dont know your exact situation, some or all of these might not be feasible; if that’s the case, you can message me again with more details if you want? and i’ll look for some different things)

exercise: i know this sounds like everyone’s irritating neurotypical relative but i promise you that if you can do it, it will help. exercise:

  decreases stress and anger

 helps you feel in control (even if you’re not. but it gives you hope, which is very valuable in abusive situations, right?) and 

prepares you for physical attacks, if they get so bad that your options are fight back, run, or die.

im going to assume that you don’t have equipment that you can use, but if you do, use it. if not:

running--can be done anywhere, and it costs no money. if you think you will need to hide it from your parents, then go out very early in the morning, if possible (or late at night, but the morning is usually a lot safer, and no-one will be paying attention to you. literally anyone you pass will be pre-ocupied with going to work or school, and they will usually be too tired to even look up from their coffee). also try to use a specific pair of clothes--t-shirt, shorts if you have them, one sports bra if you use those, to minimize the amount of sweaty clothes you’ll be putting in the wash. during exercise is a good time to maybe think about your abusers--let yourself get mad. let yourself get pissed, if you can, and use the anger to run even harder. i did this a lot when i still lived with my parents, and it probably saved my life.

weights--you can often buy them pretty cheap on amazon or in a store, but if your parents are monitoring your purchases then you can use gallon jugs of water/milk (if they dont buy galons of water/milk then u can buy 1 gallon of water for around 1USD in most stores, which would be easier to hide and explain than any purchase of exercise equipment). fill the gallons with water, and lift them--you can google “dumbbell exercises” for some exercise routines. do this in the early morning if possible.

push-ups/sit-ups--these are probably the least satisfying to do, at least for me? but also the easiest if you aren’t able to get outside early morning, or if you’re absolutely not going to be able to buy any kind of weights. if you can’t do a full push-up, try working up to it by putting your weight on your knees, instead of your toes.

i recommend that you look into proper technique before you do any of these--im just trying to give you ideas.

if exercise isn’t feasible for any reason, then art is the next way to go. a lot of trauma survivors (especially child abuse survivors) write poetry. visual art is also a good outlet but i’ve found that it’s usually a bit less cathartic. if your parents go through your things regularly, then either make a new tumblr account and tell nobody about it, and write your stuff there, or (if tumblr isnt safe) write only on single sheets of printer/notebook paper and burn or shred them immediately after you’re done. 

if you think you’re not a good enough writer to do this, then listen: you’re not writing this for it to be good. you’re not. it doesn’t matter at all. no-one else will ever read it. you don’t even have to read it again. it doesnt have to look or sound good. the only objective is to process your trauma and anger. the plus side is that no matter what, you will improve your writing by doing this, so if you are interested in being a poet, or already are, then writing trauma poetry will only help you. i recommend poetry instead of prose (prose is anything that isn’t poetry) because you don’t have to worry about structure, or about it making sense/having a plot. it can be really hard at first, especially if you don’t usually write a lot. if you need to, you can try using these prompts (they probably arent all applicable but if you can finish any of these sentences in your head, then you can write a poem about it) (possible trigger warning, skip the bullet points if you need to)(i’m just going to use “they” because any gender of person could do this and i don’t want to make assumptions but you can swap out the pronouns if necessary)

they wouldn’t stop ...

i don’t feel safe ...

they hit me when ...

i feel like i stopped existing at [age]...

i don’t want to be here ...

when you are writing, let yourself get mad, if possible. nothing you write will have any consequences if you burn the page, right? nothing is out of bounds. write anything and everything. write about how they’ll burn in hell. about how you hope they get murdered gruesomely. about how you’ll rip them into pieces the next time they touch you. anything. if you can’t summon anger, that’s okay. you can also write about how you feel like you’re rotting. you can write about how you miss when they were good to you. or how they were never good to you, but you miss it anyway. about how when you get out, you’ll have a nice apartment with someone you love (platonically or romantically, it doesnt matter), and maybe a pet, and how you’ll go to the bakery down the street sometimes and get croissants and sit in the sun and how it will be okay. how you’ll never have to see them again. how safe you’ll be. how happy you’ll be.

any of that will be cathartic, i promise you. i started writing poetry at the age of 12, and all of it was about my abuse. it was bad--i went back and read it a few months ago, and i’ve improved a hell of a lot since then. i’ve worked through a lot of my trauma, partially with a therapist, but mostly with my writing. it’s easier than therapy for me, because no-one else can see me while i do it. it’s easier to break down every part of the abuse, to analyze it. and after writing a poem, i always feel drained, like i just lanced an infection or something. i dont know. but writing works. i promise.

therapy is the last thing thing on my list here because its very inaccessable to a lot of people. minors, anyone without insurance, or anyone in a rural area is going to have a hell of a time getting therapy, you know? so that’s why its last. if you have a good therapist, it’ll probably be the most helpful of all of these, but even that is a hit and miss (i’ve seen at least a dozen therapists, psychiatrists, psychologists, and mixtures of both, and i always seem to get the people who don’t believe me, who think that yelling at me will fix problems, who report everything to my parents. but not everyone’s like that--i just have some incredibly shit luck).

if you can get a therapist, do. they can help immensely. if you can’t, then try the other things until you can get to a position where therapy is accessable for you.

i hope this helped, im sorry its so long? and im sorry it took like a week gah