#I've been fantasizing about relapsing on coke
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I fucking hate using my diagnosis as an excuse but holy fucking shit my brain is screaming and tearing itself apart from these overwhelming emotions and I know I need to get back on my meds but I don't fucking want to i am not me when I'm on them but I'm SO much more stable when I'm taking my meds but holy fuck
#I've been fantasizing about relapsing on coke#I won't#but I can fantasize#it isn't good right now#I'm the worst I've been in years#I meant to post this to my vent blog#but this is fine#I'll take a big dab when I get home#and I'll be fine
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